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michael lohan

living la vida lohan

Michael Lohan's Love Child Already Working The Press

Michael Lohan sure has a knack for joining forces with others who are also more than willing to put their children in the spotlight. Lohan's alleged love child Ashley and her mother Kristi Kaufman were interviewed on Entertainment Tonight yesterday, in which the two talked about how much Ashley looks like Lindsay — which she really doesn't — and how much she really wants to meet her half-siblings. The pair also said that it's time for Michael to own up to his responsibility and make good on the promises he's made to Ashley and her mother...like helping to make Ashley a star. (Seriously, these people said this.) What's super incriminating though, is all the jail mail that Michael sent to Ashley while he was locked up, signing each letter "Love, Daddy." Clip above.

living la vida lohan

Which Is Worse: Being A Child Star Or Being The Sibling Of A Child Star?

Sometimes, when watching Living Lohan, I want to cut Dina Lohan some slack, and think of her as the normal, suburban Long Island mom that she insists she is. However after hearing both Cody and Michael Jr. talk about the sacrifices they have to make (being pulled from school and leaving their friends for months at a time) for their sisters' careers, I wonder if Dina really is the nightmare stage mom the press makes her out to be. Then again, her second child Michael, who's now 20, seems to be relatively well adjusted, so who really knows? Clip above.

living la vida lohan

Michael Lohan Jr. Is Refreshingly "Normal"

We never really hear about Michael Lohan Jr. After seeing him on Living Lohan last night, I'm thinking that's because he might just be the sanest, most grounded person in that family. He was the first to admit to the family having to deal with the fallout from his parents' bitter divorce and "Lindsay and all her crap," whereas Dina attributes the family's troubles to the tabloid media. It's kinda sad how Michael has taken on the responsibility of being the "man of the house" at the age of 20, and that Dina willingly allows him to accept that. I felt kinda bad for Michael's girlfriend when watching the episode, because the girl really wanted to go home and spend time with her own family, but her needs weren't as important as the Lohan clan's. Christ, could you imagine having to deal with them as in-laws? Even though they aren't really married? Clip above.


dirt bag

Steven Tyler: Only His Feet Are In Rehab

  • Steven Tyler says his "trademark athletic performances" injured his feet and that's why he's in rehab. He explains: "The doctors told me the pain in my feet could be corrected but it would require a few surgeries over time. The 'foot repair' pain was intense, greater than I'd anticipated. The months of rehabilitative care and the painful strain of physical therapy were traumatic. I really needed a safe environment to recuperate where I could shut off my phone and get back on my feet." A. May. Zing. Who knew rehab was like a chilly pool? You can just dip your toes in it! [TMZ]
  • Michael Lohan: Looking for Lindsay! Apparently he heard she was in New York with Sam Ronson and was kind of hanging around her hotel even though she has no interest in seeing him. A source says: "Michael was staking out the lobby and waiting for Lindsay to make an appearance. It was freaky. He was sitting on the steps and texting like mad, and looking very upset that she hadn't arrived." [Page Six]
  • Alicia Keys is on strict vocal rest when not performing, so she only whispered at a recent photo shoot. And that's why she is not speaking to you. [Page Six]
  • Shocker: Scarlett Johannson's album is not selling very well. [Entertainment Weekly]
  • As previously reported, Clay Aiken has impregnated someone. Artificially, of course. [Yahoo News]
More »

dirt bag

Jessica & Tony Split; Joel Parties With Lindsay While Nicole Babysits

  • Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo: Dunzo! [TMZ]
  • OMG. Was Joel Madden flirting with Lindsay Lohan? Apparently Nicole Richie was home with the baby and Joel was out when Paris Hilton sent Nic a text: "Lindsay was all over Joel!" Nicole tried calling and Joel didn't pick up. Is this how it's gonna be? [Star]
  • Lindsay Lohan's father thinks someone is supplying LL with drugs and Janet Charlton has posted a picture of LL with Samantha Ronson with the words, "Michael, the answer could be right under your nose - or better still, Lindsay's nose." [Janet Charlton's Hollywood]
  • Is Mariah Carey pregnant? Apparently someone from her camp called famed L.A. baby boutique Petit Trésor and asked about (wait for it...) butterflies. [Rush & Molloy]
  • Mariah and new hubby Nick rented out Six Flags Magic Mountain last night so they could have a wedding celebration with their homies. Roller coasters? Just like MC's "Fantasy" video. Which came out in 1995. When Mariah was 25. And Nick Cannon was 15. Not that it matters. [TMZ]
  • Oh, wait: Nick had the theme park shut down as a surprise for Mariah. That is sweet. These two just might melt your cold cold heart. [ET]
  • John Mayer had a show in Orlando last night and totally kissed Jennifer Aniston backstage between songs. [People]
More »

dirt bag

Lindsay Sings: "If I Want It, I Get It. Now."

  • Synth! Dance beat! Breathy vocals! It's Lindsay Lohan's new track, "Bossy." And guess what? It doesn't totally suck. "Stop touching me without permission," she sings. "I'm jut a little bossy. If I want it, I get it — Now." Ha! Like that fur coat? But is the song as good as Kelis's "Bossy"? Well, LL's track was written by Ne-Yo. Lemme know what you think. I may have to listen again. And Again. And then one more time, with rollerskates on. I'm so embarrassed. [People]
  • Meanwhile: Lindsay's dad Michael is pissed that the Mingling Moms named ex-wife Dina a "Top Mom." He says: "Are you kidding? Look at her off-screen antics, her lack of morals and how she conducts herself. She comes stumbling out of Butter at 3:15 a.m. with bloodshot eyes and a red runny nose, yelling 'Oh, [bleep],' when she saw the paparazzi." Meanwhile, Dina says: "He's on a mission to destroy me." Wow, this kind of stuff must be great for the kids to hear. [Page Six]
  • So Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon spill all their wedding details to People, including the fact that they get along because they are 'both eternally 12 years old" and Mariah now has a "Mrs. Cannon" tattoo. [Yahoo News]
  More »

dirt bag

Mariah Gets Engaged... With Used Ring

  • Mariah Carey, 38, is engaged to Wild 'N Out star Nick Cannon, 27. Yeah, weird. Did you even know they knew each other? [Access Hollywood]
  • And, um, the ring Nick gave Mariah is the same one he gave his former fiancé, Victoria's Secret model Selita Ebanks. That is just Tackée Harry. [Perez Hilton]
  • Madonna humped Justin Timberlake in during her show at New York City's Roseland. The more things change, the more they stay the same, no? [E!]
  • A second nanny in the Rob Lowe case has filed a cross complaint and it says that Rob's wife Sheryl sexually harassed her by walking around naked and asking about the size of the nanny's boyfriend's penis. (Apparently the boyfriend is a 7 foot former NBA player.) But yeah, from an employer? Ew. [TMZ]
  • The nanny also says the wife was "perverted, disgusting and crude." [People]
  • Meanwhile, Rob Lowe's lawyer says the allegations are false, obvs. [People]
More »

dirt bag

Newlyweds Jay-Z & Beyoncé: Already Brawling

  • Lovers' spat! At a Barack Obama party, the DJ started playing "Crazy In Love" and Jay-Z grabbed the mic and said, "Sorry Bey but fuck that — let's play something else." B was pissed! Later the couple kissed and made up, though. [Mirror]
  • This should not come as a surprise and hardly qualifies as news, but Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt of The Hills want their own show. They've been in NYC pitching it to execs; it would be about them (gag) planning their wedding. Listen, if we all concentrate, maybe we can prevent this from happening: Every time Spencer gets what he wants, an angel loses its wings. [Page Six]
  • Amy Winehouse has taken up painting watercolors. I want to hang one in my apartment so badly. [Mirror]
More »

dirt bag

Sources Swear Ashlee Simpson Is Knocked Up

  • Remember how sources said Ashlee was knocked up and then Pete Wentz said she wasn't ? Now sources say Ashlee Simpson is pregnant and will get married next month at a private residence in Southern California. [People]
  • Jessica Simpson is reportedly jealous of little sis Ashlee, since she's always wanted a baby and even joked she'd resort to making her hairstylist Ken Paves the daddy. Oy. [MSNBC]
  • Cameron Diaz's father died suddenly yesterday; the cause was pneumonia. [TMZ]
  • Um, prepare yourself: Rob Lowe's nanny says he repeatedly exposed his "flaccid penis" and his "erect penis" to her, repeatedly asked her "to touch his penis," repeatedly masturbated in front of her, showed her pornographic images on his computer, asked her to give him a massage and tell him dirty stories. Shudder. [TMZ]
  • So yeah, the nanny is countersuing Lowe for sexual harassment. She is seeking $50,000 in general damages as well as punitive damages and unpaid wages. [Reuters]
More »

dirt bag

Britney Gets In Fender Bender

  • Britney Spears was involved in a minor car accident Saturday night; no one was injured and no vehicles were damaged. [AP]
  • Apparently Brit was in stop and go traffic, driving at about 10 m.p.h. and putting on her makeup before the accident. Brit passed a field sobriety test. [TMZ]
  • Dr. Phil is so classy and generous! He allegedly posted bond for one of the cheerleaders arrested for beating a teenage girl on videotape because her grandmother told reporters she didn't have the money to bail her granddaughter out. Of course, that means that Dr. Phil would have "exclusive" rights to her story. [TMZ]
  • But wait! It wasn't Dr. Phil but a production assistant from his show. Also known as a scapegoat. [TMZ]
  • A source says "It's getting desperate" behind the scenes of Dr. Phil's show. Ya think? [MSNBC]
More »

dirt bag

Will Heath Ledger Win A Posthumous Oscar?

  • Will Heath Ledger earn an Academy Award for his role as the Joker in The Dark Knight? That's the buzz coming out of his native Australia. [News.com.au]
  • Pete Doherty setting young heroin addicts straight on a new TV show? With music-based therapy sessions? Verdict: Maybeshambles. [Sydney Morning Herald]
  • Amy Winehouse took a cab home but couldn't pay for it. Anybody got a tenner? [TMZ]
  • George Clooney is putting pressure on Olympic supplier Omega watches to make a stand against China's lax Darfur policy. This gossip column calls it the Sexiest Scolding Alive. [Rush & Molloy]
More »

dirt bag

Jamie Lynn, Lily Allen, Fantasia: Totally Knocked Up

  • Britney Spears found out that her 16-year-old sister Jamie Lynn was pregnant when everybody else did... Last night as the new issue of OK! was dropping. She was said to be "frantic" when she heard. [TMZ]
  • Then Brit told a group of photographers and fans, "My sister's not pregnant." [TMZ]
  • Then she issued a statement: "Britney is aware of the news regarding Jamie Lynn's pregnancy. She wishes her sister nothing but the best and asks for privacy during this time." She can ask, but she's not gonna get it. [Perez Hilton]
  • Oh, and Lynne Spears' book on parenting is being delayed. Good idea! [People]
More »

jezebel: the marketing survey

The Jezebel Reader: Profile Of A Bleeding-Heart, Bleeding-Sexed, Socially-Conscious Clive Owen-Worshiping Slob

Dear Reader:
As our esteemed colleague Anna announced this morning, today is our six month anniversary. Now give yourselves a pat on the back for contributing to our momentous growth and all around well-being. Done? Great. After a few days of extensive data mining, we'd like to take this opportunity to present to you a psychographic profile of the average Jezebel reader. Who is this elusive hussy? Is she for or against period sex? Does she think Tyra Banks had a nose job? Does she like black, white or Asian babies best? We used the scientifically infallible method of culling your poll answers to create a foolproof Jezebel reader profile. Our results after the jump. More »

dirt bag

Catherine Zeta-Jones Is Not Anorexic

  • Catherine Zeta-Jones is speaking out! She wants you to know that, despite the rumors, she is not anorexic. Uh, we never even heard those rumors. [People]
  • Owen Wilson's interview on MySpace — conducted by director Wes Anderson — covered a lot of topics, but not Wilson's suicide attempt. [People]
  • Halle Berry has told Actors Studio host James Lipton that when her father beat her sister and mother, "it was the worst year" of her life. Her parents divorced when she was 4 years old. [Mirror]
  • Is Britney Spears dating Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo? They were seen "hanging out" over the weekend. Last week we read he was dating One Tree Hill star Sophia Bush, so whatever. [People]
More »

dirt bag

It's Ring Time For Rose And Robert

  • Rose McGowan and her Planet Terror director Robert Rodriguez: Engaged! She was previously engaged to Marilyn Manson; he was previously married to the mother of his 5 kids. (Did we ever tell you our theory? That Rob likes Rose partly because her name starts with an R? His kids are named Rocket, Racer, Rebel, Rogue and Rhiannon.) [People]
  • Word on Britney Spears is that she will get one monitored overnight visit with her kids per week. Apparently her behavior in the courtroom was "appalling." She interrupted the L.A. County Commissioner, was "sarcastic," "contentious, argumentative and condescending." [TMZ]
  • Hmm, or did she address the judge in a "soft and respectful voice" ? [People]
  • In any case, after court, Britney went shopping at Neiman-Marcus. [ET]
More »

rich & rehabulous

Celebrity Rehab: The Only "Promise" Is Lindsay Will Remain A Coke-Addled Lush Who Can't Drive

Call me naive; I always figured that, profligacy/paparazzi/presence of other addicted photogenic celebs aside, Lindsay was on balance better off in rehab than at, you know, Hyde. Really, what was I thinking? There is no crop of people more price-insensitive than a bunch of people used to watching a few grand disappear inside their nostrils every day, which is why the sliding scale for rehab in Malibu ranges from the ghetto no-frills cost of $15,000 a month to practically 70 grand a month at Passages, and not that I really give a shit about the exploitation and mistreatment of celebrities but I would like a little variety in my TMZ news cycle and today's LA Times investigation into Promises etc. actually managed to piss me off: there aren't even any fucking doctors working at these places! More »

Lindsay Lohan and her father, Michael, will spend five days together at a secluded Utah lodge, reports People. "It can only help her recovery," Dina Lohan says. "It's time to mend." Also, we're not sure Michael has anything else to do. We're not kidding. After two stints in prison, rehab, and failed reality TV pitches, Michael doesn't really have any cash flow. In July, when asked whether he would seek employment, as the judge ordered, he countered: "I work for (Christian drug and alcohol program) Teen Challenge. I work for God." Hopefully The Almighty can spot Michael 5 vacation days. [People, Access Hollywood]