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Martha Stewart

leftovers

England To Martha Stewart: Denied! • Woman Beats Sex Offender Neighbor With Bat

WTF, England: The British government has banned Martha Stewart from entering the UK because of her criminal convictions in 2004. Wait, didn't Paris visit England a few months ago? • Some genius just found out that word-of-mouth influences shopping decisions and now the workplace is being called a "lucrative marketing channel for advertisers." Ugh. • A Mass. high school has banned the nickname, "Redmen," from their sports teams, while residents claim they will continue to fight to keep the name. Goody! I wonder if these "residents" will enjoy my new sport's team nickname, "'Nillamotherfuckers." I think it sounds "very noble and dignified." • GOP women are defecting from McCain! Ok, two women. But one of them is rich! • Meanwhile, the other side of the political spectrum (sort of) thinks reproductive rights aren't playing a big role for women this election year. • Overheard at the beach: "I'll tell you what I would do if a guy gave me a promise statue! I'd lube that shit up and stick it in my vag!" • A woman beat a man with a baseball bat after learning he was a level 3 sex offender from a police flyer. She snapped after remembering him talking to her young daughter, she said she "would do it again" if given the chance. • Oh look! It is a swimming hedgehog! And he's named Shming! Excuse me for a moment, I have to go see if you can nom a hedgehog. (Warning: The voices on the video may cause your head to explode).

rag trade

Meet Karenna, Martha Stewart's Wardrobe Mistress

  • Martha Stewart has a wardrobe mistress paint the soles of her Christian Louboutins black. We would endorse this, as we take most of our fashion cues from the fictional character Cayce Pollard in William Gibson's Pattern Recognition and think that conspicuous logos are the scourge of the universe, but blogging about the fact that you not only remove said logos but have a "wardrobe mistress" to do it for you is not exactly inconspicuous. And yet...I love her? [The Martha Blog]
  • Ooooh, promo shots from Stylista, the new Tyra-produced reality show wherein the winner gets to be the assistant to known-psychopath Anne Slowey! Anne, an Elle editor, is one of those fashion people who is driven batshit by persistent fad dieting, but the resultant batshitism, in an industry whose shallowness is matched only by its aloofness, can be kind of endearing, unless you are her assistant. Ratings gold! [Fashionologie]
  • Tori Spelling and her son are shilling for Skechers, which I find fitting. I mean, Skechers is sort of the Tori Spelling of shoe brands, and if you don't believe me I'm here to remind you the company was founded by the same guy who brought the world L.A. Gear. [SassyBella]
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the good, the bad & the ugly

Women Rule At The Time 100 Party

Last night in New York, Time magazine hosted a reception honoring its self-selected 100 Most Influential people of the year and, I have to say, the women in attendance were a cool bunch: Arianna Huffington, Martha Stewart, Angelica Huston, Wendy Kopp, Tina Fey, Madeeha Hasan Odhaib, Elizabeth Gilbert, and others. And since today's my last day as a full-time Jezebel, I've decided to focus less on the clothes and more on what they've accomplished. On the whole, these are women sans stylists: They're all Good in my book! (Though Wendi Deng's dress is a little unforgivable.) More »

clips

Rosie O'Donnell Offers Unflinching Glimpse Into Martha Stewart's Jailhouse Soul

They've been counting down to Rosie O'Donnell's appearance on Rachael Ray forever now. But after watching today's much-hyped episode, I can't help but think that what they should have been counting down to was Rosie O'Donnell's phenomenal vocal-impression of Martha Stewart and her tale of visiting the her in a West Virginia women's prison back in 2004, when Martha confessed that what she missed most about life on the outside was "lemons". Clip above.

rag trade

Donatella Versace Expresses Love For Fellow Blondes

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the good, the bad & the ugly

Tribeca Film Festival: The Stars Dress Up For Robert DeNiro

It's officially springtime in New York. (And no, not just because it's an insane 78 degrees today.) Last night marked the opening of this year's Tribeca Film Festival, the indie showcase masterminded by Robert DeNiro and producer Jane Rosenthal in an effort to reinvigorate Lower Manhattan and the New York art community alike. In addition to DeNiro and his gorgeous wife Grace Hightower, David Bowie, Iman, Martha Stewart, Donna Karan, Russell Simmons, Porschia Coleman, Sigourney Weaver, Natasha Richardson, Gayle King, Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld, and others were on hand. The full Good, Bad & Ugly, after the jump. More »

Today on Martha, Joan Rivers dropped by to help Martha Stewart make chocolate-covered matzah. Said Joan: "Every time I see matzah, it reminds me of my chest: Flat and covered in brown spots."

dirt bag

Sources Swear Ashlee Simpson Is Knocked Up

  • Remember how sources said Ashlee was knocked up and then Pete Wentz said she wasn't ? Now sources say Ashlee Simpson is pregnant and will get married next month at a private residence in Southern California. [People]
  • Jessica Simpson is reportedly jealous of little sis Ashlee, since she's always wanted a baby and even joked she'd resort to making her hairstylist Ken Paves the daddy. Oy. [MSNBC]
  • Cameron Diaz's father died suddenly yesterday; the cause was pneumonia. [TMZ]
  • Um, prepare yourself: Rob Lowe's nanny says he repeatedly exposed his "flaccid penis" and his "erect penis" to her, repeatedly asked her "to touch his penis," repeatedly masturbated in front of her, showed her pornographic images on his computer, asked her to give him a massage and tell him dirty stories. Shudder. [TMZ]
  • So yeah, the nanny is countersuing Lowe for sexual harassment. She is seeking $50,000 in general damages as well as punitive damages and unpaid wages. [Reuters]
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rag trade

Madonna: Why Stop At One When You Can Achieve World "Green" Magazine Cover Domination?

  • Oh, look, it's Madonna. On the cover of a glossy magazine's "green" issue. How novel! And even more exciting: Elle is doing some fashion designer water bottle promotion. [Fashion Week Daily]
  • Robin Givhan on Madge: "Her latest incarnation — blond waves, lace-up boots and a corset — speaks to the most old-fashioned, condescending sentiment of all: She looks good for her age." [Washington Post]
  • Christiane Amanpour slipped Diane Von Furstenburg a note Monday night saying, "Congratulations, from one dominatrix to another." Click the jump while there is still time to get a Jamie Rubin Barry Diller BDSM image out of your mind! [NYDN]
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Nathan Lane popped by Martha today to make Easter crafts with Ms. Stewart. Only, he sorta refused to do the craft (making faux-chocolate Easter bunnies) and, while creating the mold (which involved using binder clips) Lane remarked, "Rock Hard Putty — used by Eliot Spitzer!" before going on to exclaim, "It's alright, Martha. They're not going to do this...People have jobs, they have lives, they don't have time to make damn putties!" After a commercial, break Lane told the audience that he had been given a Ritalin during the break and was ready to work. But after Martha handed him a file for him to smooth the edges on his bunny — Lane couldn't help himself: "Did you learn this in prison, Martha?" Martha's reply? "Yes. I did." [Martha Stewart]

dirt bag

Nicole & Joel: Not Spending Enough Time With The Baby?

  • Nicole Richie and Joel Madden were seen partying Grammy weekend, so some random source says, "It's almost as if they aren't parents." Kind of a cheap shot. But yeah, the nanny is apparently working overtime. Mom and dad need to party! [Page Six]
  • Guess who was on the set when Lindsay Lohan posed nude for Bert Stern's Marilyn Monroe-inspired New York magazine shoot? Not momager Dina, but 14-year-old little sis, Ali. Picking up tips on how to behave? [Rush & Molloy]
  • Dad Jamie tells Britney's new bodyguards not to let her go to a bar or bathroom alone. Also, when she left a restaurant Saturday, she took a cup of coffee with her. [Page Six]
  • Britney's ongoing custody case reconvenes in court today. First order of business: Who will rep Brit? The firm of Trope and Trope bailed. [E!]
  • If you find Bindi Irwin vaguely terrifying, wait until you see her doll. [TMZ]
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clips

Martha Stewart Speaks Best In Show Beagle's Language

Of the many reasons why I love Martha Stewart, her obsessive and fanatic love of animals is surely near the top of the list. Today she had on Uno, the adorable, 3-year old beagle who won Best In Show last night at the Westminster Dog Show. [I was at a bar watching this 'lil guy "collect" his trophy, and let me tell you: Barflies CHEERED. -Ed.] What we learned: Uno is from South Carolina and continues to love to "talk"... and Martha was more than glad to talk right back to him. Clip above.

rag trade

Karl Lagerfeld: Now Pocket Sized

  • Karl Lagerfeld has designed a lead figurine of himself, to be sold as a limited edition (1,000 units only) for $300 at Paris boutique Colette. Perfect for teaching etiquette, nutrition, and brand-expansion strategy to your Homies! [WWD, 3rd item]
  • Agyness Deyn has replaced Drew Barrymore as the face of English designer Giles Deacon's diffusion line, Gold. Anyway, if they were looking for someone less overexposed than Drew Barrymore, they failed. [Vogue UK]
  • Aw, gender equality! Male models are getting freakishly thin, too. [NY Mag]
  • Diane von Furstenberg: "Is it clothes that make you glamorous? I don't think so! Glamour is shine, glamour is having an aura, and that is not just about clothes or makeup — I am very often without makeup, and I always look for comfortable clothes. For me, it's important to be who you are, or — even better—to be who you want to be." This doesn't exactly make sense, but at least it seems sincere! [BlackBook]
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dirt bag

Nicole & Christina Are Mommies; Britney's On Wedding Watch

  • As reported late Friday, Nicole Richie gave birth to her baby on January 11, a daughter she named Harlow Winter Kate Madden. (6 lbs., 7oz.) Ooh, pretty name! Er, names, that is. [People]
  • And the next day, just down the hall in Cedars Sinai's maternity ward, Christina Aguilera gave birth to a baby boy, Max Liron Bratman, (6 lbs. 2 oz.) on Saturday. Seventeen years from now, will Max and Harlow be dating? [TMZ]
  • Britney Spears and new boyfriend Adnan Ghalib went shopping over the weekend and Ghalib got into a "shoving match" with the paparazzi. Dude, don't forget where you came from! [Page Six]
  • Um, while Brit and her man were car shopping, she was wearing her old wedding dress. [People]
  • Did Britney pay for Adnan's new Mercedes SUV? [PopDirt]
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rag trade

Tim Gunn Makes Conflict-Of-Interest Case Work

  • Tim Gunn is taking some conflict-of-interest heat regarding a recent column he wrote OK! magazine. (Tim writes for OK!? How declasse!) When advising a reader about what jeans are best to fit most bodies, he steered the reader towards Liz Claiborne and Lucky Brand. Funny thing is, Gunn just happens to be the Chief Creative Officer of Liz Claiborne. [WWD, 2nd item]
  • The ads of David Beckham in his Emporio Armani undies don't hit the UK 'til March, but sales for white men's briefs have already gone up 50% since the announcement was made that Beckham's face (and balls) would be tied to the brand. [WWD, 2nd item]
  • Marc Jacobs on his camel toe costume: "I love being the unexpected, even if that means not moving for the entire night. You just kind of slide in from the front and hang out here. And the fur is all artificial of course, but there is simply too much of it!" Why are we not surprised that Jacobs would be anti-bush? [Fashion Week Daily]
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nesting into hibernation

A Look Back At Blueprint, A Magazine That Dared To Be Pretty

Today Martha Stewart's fashion/lifestyle glossy for the Grey's Anatomy generation, Blueprint followed Jane, House & Garden and Vibe Vixen into magazine heaven. Wherefore the untimely death? What can we learn from its tasteful, cheerily minimalist time on this earth's newsstands? Right now Blueprint is probably wishing it had never been born, which is why it's the job of Moe and Guardian Editorial Angel Maria to peruse the November/December issue to remind the world what Blueprint achieved in its short eighteen-odd months in publication. More »

rag trade

Just What The World Needs: 'Sex And The City' Panties

  • Oh, Christ. There is going to be a Sex and the City lingerie line by Cosabella as a tie-in with the movie. Predictably, there will be four mini-lines, named after each of the four main characters on the show, meaning the "Samantha" line will be for the transgendered? Excellent. [WWD, 1st item]
  • How did we not know that Nina Ricci designer Olivier Theyskens once collaborated with the Smashing Pumpkins? [Vogue UK]
  • "I collect vintage jewelry and I'm lucky enough to be married to a rich man who can buy it for me." So says Iman. Um, so like, all that modeling you've been doing over the past few decades has been pro bono? How nice. [WWD, sub req'd]
  • Mark your Chanukadvent calendars! Isaac Mizrahi is appearing on Martha Stewart's show on Dec. 18! We can't wait to see those two queens frost cookies together. [Fashion Week Daily]
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It's official: Martha Stewart is a saint. Over at the Sirius Radio headquarters in Manhattan, she "personally reworked" a holiday tree in the lobby, a staffer claims. "She really got into it, she put on tons of lights, ornaments and hung Howard Stern and Martha cookies," the source squeals. "It's an unbelievable tree, we don't even remember the one before... It was drab and ugly, and they didn't invest a lot of time in it. Martha saved Christmas." Is there anything she can't do? [Page Six]