I don't know how a heavily pregnant Heidi can stand in these heels...one hopes at least that she doesn't have a good view of the unfortunate tie-dyed border.


Rhyon Brown's dress looks like rainbow sherbet, except with...coffee, instead of lime. You decide whether this is a good thing.


Olivia Munn proves that a sack with a zipper down the front is still a sack.


Kim Coles is wise to break up this bamboo grove with a belt...but it's a little uncanny how exactly the belt matches her hair.


I get that the whole little-tramp menswear thing is back, but seriously, couldn't Maria Menounos has hemmed her trousers like 1/2" shorter?


I like to think that Malin Akerman pulled this out of the closet on laundry day at the last second and still kind of makes it work.


Monica has the look of a woman whose pants are cutting off her circulation.


So does Lauren 'Lo' Bosworth. And her very loud jacket only distracts momentarily.


I have a really hard time not seeing Miranda Cosgrove as the brat from School of Rock - even though I know she's a tween star in her own right, who wears rather adult one-shouldered cocktail frocks.


Elisabeth Shue sports an LBD - longish black dress - and a very frumpy pair of Easy Spirit-ish shoes.


Cheryl Hines has found it: the most hideously unflattering pair of shoes in all the land.





Morgan Freeman: Fagin called. He wants his gloves back.


I like Tichina Arnold's daughter's version of the mother-daughter ensemble better - but in combination, they're pretty cute.

[Images via Getty]

Angelina Jolie channels Lara Croft - or Megan Fox - and it looks really uncomfortable in all kinds of ways. Not that, as her PR flacks would remind us EVERYONE IN THE WORLD DOESN'T STILL WANT TO SLEEP WITH HER STRAIGHT MEN GAY MEN LESBIANS STRAIGHT WOMEN BOW DOWN!


Yeah, everyone kinda misses the Buffalo 66 look. But there's something to be said for Christina Ricci just embracing Blythe Doll.


I'm sure we've seen this dress before (yay!), but - maybe because of her loyalty to former employer Kaiser Karl - when I picture Diane Kruger it's always in something like this: feather-embellished and fuzzy and haute.


Okay, I don't think Jenna Fischer's Grecian is the most flattering on her, although if she'd worked in a more structured fabric, it could have succeeded. Sometimes it seems like, instead of angels and devils, she's got a little "dowdy monster" on her shoulder whispering bad fashion advice.


Okay, so, I always love me some slightly-mature Valley of the Dolls, and Carla Gugino's rocking it. You will notice I am making no objection to the grape hue. I am working on it. I even - get this - just got a vintage bike with a carriage the color of Beaujolais Nouveau. It's called "The Sophisticate." And since my nom de guerre is "the petite sophisticate," it's like the universe was telling me that it was time to put aside my purple issues and move on.


I'm actually very interested to see what happens when Maria Menounos lifts her arms: does it suddenly skew poncho? Skirt? Or mini?


Do I love this corset action? No. Does it feel a little "romanticized bordello?" Yes. Does Melanie Laurent look stunning? You betcha.


See, I think I could like Jessica Lowndes' frock if my eye weren't distracted by her equally shiny accessories - which I just want to pick up in my beak and hoard in my nest.


Sue me. I love Bridget Fonda's 50's bohemian. You just know she cooks with garlic and likes folk music.

[Images via Getty]

Okay. I'm not sure why Amy Adams' hair looks filthy, and her shoes look too narrow for her feet (I know the lateral squash all too well) but digging on the crisp frock!


Obviously Julie Powell and Amy Adams looks absolutely nothing alike (and it can't be fun to have to dress for one of these things as the token non-actor, I always think.) But Julie looks terrific, and her shoes fit way better, too.


It took me a moment to determine whether Giada De Laurentiis' top had a weird kangaroo pocket or just a weird fan ruffle, sur-crotch. Methinks it's the latter. But can I say how much I love the food celebs here?


I despise so many things about the lovely Ashley Greene's ensemble that an itemized list would rival the Key to All Mythologies in length.


I'm not normally a major fan of the Valley of the Dolls-style evolution of maternity-chic - and this fabric is pretty susceptible to wrinkling, considering it's gotta sit through a film - but Jane Lynch looks comfy, happy.


I don't think I've ever seen Mary Lynn Rajskub look better than she does in this soft Grecian.


I'd sort of like to see Meryl Streep's easy jersey sans cardi, but heck, a gal's gotta protect against the drafts.


Okay, this is from his website and I don't think I can improve on it: "Suave, sophisticated Emrhys Cooper delivers a one-two punch of brooding good looks and versatility with a dash of playfulness." He also adds a dash of Tab Hunter hair.


You know who this event needed? Brittny Gastineau. And, thank goodness, she's also showing her bra. Now everyone can relax and enjoy the movie!


As regards 80's nostalgia: I don't remember the 80's being that good. It involved a lot of graham crackers and a severe limit on the amount of TV I was allowed to watch. (I chose David the Gnome.) Nina Bergman disagrees.


I kind of love how Kate Flannery always does "approachable but commanding boss" on the red carpet.


When, Yvonne Strahovski, did it become okay to wear a transparent shirt on the red carpet? Or did it...not?


I can't tell whether Maria Menounos is headed to a disco, a playpen, a tractor or a Mormon temple. I guess this really is all-purpose!


Rob McElhenney, meanwhile, can apparently go fly-fishing directly from the premiere.


Nora Ephron may feel bad about her neck, but there's certainly no reason to worry about her classic uniform of clean basics! (Yes, that was cheesy. And made no sense.)


The Alice Waters seal of approval! I'd love to see her closet and touch all the silks. I'll bet it smells of sage. Sorry, creepy!


I'm starting to think it's not a premiere until perma-guest Kat Kramer shows. How? Why? Maybe she's become such an institution that all the PR people figure everyone must know something they don't. Whatever, I love her.


Looking at Molly Sims' myriad straps gives me sympathy pangs: Can you imagine wrestling with this in a store dressing room, breaking out in a cold sweat and wondering if you'll ever extricate yourself?


[Images via Getty, Bauer-Griffin]

Kim, in Starship Enterprise lbd, is the most demure in her family - by a wide margin.


I'd always understood that people liked bandage dresses because they kind of held you in. Beth Shack has taught me otherwise. And, yes, I do understand that the dress code for the Playboy Mansion is "take your shortest, tightest, lowest dress. Make it shorter, tighter, lower. Then an old man in pajamas will let you in."


Kris Jenner shows inventiveness: a gym towel is functional and decorative! (I kid! I kid! It's a stole!) By the way, am I the only one who's ever wondered if Kris was a really big Kinks fan? Yes? Okay, then.


I'm a defender of the romper, onesie, playsuit, what have you, which I feel has dissertation-worthy implications about the state of society and the economy. But. The low-crotch, diaper-style varietal, as modeled by Maria Menounos, is another matter altogether.


Colby O'Donis is apparently a Grammy-nominated songwriter. He is also accomplished in the art of sartorial douchebaggery. Indeed, I'd go so far as to say, not merely nominated, but award-winning.


Khloe Kardashian feels "drapery" and "skintight" are not mutually exclusive. As is her prerogative.


Kourtney Kardashian must be really hard to talk with in this dress. You'd have to do that thing some guys do where they look really, really intently into your eyes so as to avoid anything inappropriate.


[Images via Getty]

[Beverly Hills, California. January 12. Image via Getty.]

• Nicole Kidman was at the U.N. yesterday to urge governments to end violence against women around the globe. Such a worthy cause! (But is her face capable of emoting?) [E!]
  
• By the by, Nicole is looking waaay more pregnant. [Sydney Morning Herald]
  
• It's official: Beyoncé and Jay-Z filed their signed marriage license in Scarsdale, NY. The wedding date? April 4, duh. [People]
  
• "Amy Winehouse visits two pubs in London, tries to buy a kebab and is pissed because the shop is closed, smokes in a non-smoking store, steals a newspaper, arrives to her house at 4:00 AM, befriends 16 year-old girl, locks herself out and breaks in via the garage." [ONTD]
  
• Amy was smoking a "spliff" in a pub before all that started. Is a spliff in the UK the same thing it is in the US? [The Sun]
  
• Penguin publishing has offered Amy and Blake Incarcerated £1 million for a book about their stormy marriage. Raise your hand if you would read that. [The Sun]

• Hugh Jackman has given Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson his blessing. Not that they asked. But he is friends with X-Men costar Ryan. [People]
• Dita von Teese is the face — ambassador — of Cointreau. "I knew with [my] martini-glass act, I could eventually collaborate with a spirit brand but the opportunities that had come before just didn't seem like the right fit," she says. "And [Cointreau] is so historic and sophisticated and French." [W]
• Kathy Najimy? Seen dancing on a table at Butter? Kind of awesome. [Page Six]
• Dancing With The Stars' Cheryl Burke and Gerard Butler are not dating, but they are neighbors. "He actually lives in my apartment building, and we've been friends for a few months," she claims. Hmm, is that a regular denial or a protest-too-much denial? It's so hard to tell. [People]
• Singer John Legend might be dating ET host Maria Menounos. She annoys me. [Page Six]
• Is Barbra Streisand avoiding the 60th anniversary celebration in Israel (where she was scheduled to appear) because President Bush is going to be there? [Page Six]
• "We were shooting in Harlem, a scene where I smash the windshield of the car belonging to Tina's ex-boyfriend, who just dissed her in the club. It was 2 a.m., and everyone got their lawn chairs out and were cheering me on. They were screaming, 'You can do it! C'mon, Amy, smash that windshield!' " — Amy Poehler on filming Baby Mama. [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which A-list actor with a long-suffering wife is not only a serial philanderer (we knew that) but a major cokehead (that's news!)? He makes bathroom trips every five minutes at his favorite L.A. club and likes to have a young woman seated on his lap." [Gatecrasher]
• Richie Sambora plea bargained his DUI case. The charge was dismissed and the prosecutors did not file child endangerment charges, even though Sambora's 10-year-old daughter was in the car when he was stopped. Sambora will pay a fine and be on three years probation. [TMZ]
• Yankee Alex Rodriguez and his wife welcomed a second child Monday night in Miami. [People]
• Hot hottie Gary Dourdan of CSI and CSI: Miami's Khandi Alexander will both be leaving their shows. [Concrete Loop]
• Daniel "Harry Potter" Radcliffe told an interviewer he was smitten with a woman he met at a party, though he didn't manage to get her name or number. Two Australian women have come forward, claiming to be the beautiful stranger in question. But! Radcliffe's rep says there was no girl, it was a joke. The rep should keep his mouth shut and let Dan go on a date. [Reuters]
• Kelly Brook and Billy Zane have broken up, not that you care. [Mirror]
• The bad buzz around Tom Cruise's Nazi movie, Valkyrie, continues. And, uh, the trailer — with its mix of British and American accents — and Tom, smiling with an eye patch on — is... Yeah. [NY Times]
• Eighty-two year old actress Patricia Neal, who starred in films like A Face in the Crowd, Hud and The Day the Earth Stood Still, will receive Lifetime Achievement Award from the Nashville Film Festival. [USA Today]
• Kelly Clarkson likes to walk around her house naked, even if her home is "filled with strangers for photo shoots or fittings." Since my clothes have been gone... I can breathe for the first time... [MSNBC]
• Lou Reed and Laurie Anderson: Secretly wed! [Page Six]