• Cyndi Lauper and Lady Gaga's M.A.C. Viva Glam ad is out. Gaga looks...surprisingly normal. [FWD]

• Helena Christensen protested in Copenhagen this weekend. In quieter times, she reads the dictionary to expand her English vocabulary. And she's one of those people about text messages: "I get obsessed with spelling. I make every text message I send correct in punctuation," explains the Danish supermodel. "I am super-fastidious about certain things." [Daily Express]
• Phil Knight is standing by Tiger Woods. The scandal-plagued golfer's endorsement deal with Nike is worth a reported $30 million annually; Knight admitted doing a background check on Woods before signing him. "He came out clean," the company founder said. [Reuters]
• It has been confirmed that André Leon Talley is a new judge for the whole next cycle of America's Next Top Model. Kimora Lee Simmons is only a guest judge. It's puzzling that Vogue would want to touch anything in Tyra Banks' smizing empire with a bargepole, but it'll be great to see André's judicial robes on nighttime television. (Also: I would leave New Zealand only for Tyra et al. to set off there. They are shooting the CoverGirl challenge today in Half Moon Bay, apparently.) [TVNZ]
• Christian Lacroix has designed new uniforms for 20,000 French railway employees. They are grey and purple. Few more of these gigs and he'll have his couture business back in no time. [WWD]
• "I've struggled with it! I've struggled with that. I've struggled with that," says Tom Ford, on the luxury culture of insatiable accretion, and charging $75 for socks."Just because one is spiritual doesn't mean one doesn't like crocodile, cashmere. We live in a material world." [TDB]
• To produce its fashion show, Victoria's Secret allegedly filled half a city block with noisy generators that ran 24 hours a day for over a week. This disturbed the sleep of nearby residents, including those at a home for people with HIV. Michael Musto's anonymous source claims that the company, which coincidentally finally broadcast its show on World AIDS Day, had to offer the residents a cash settlement. [Village Voice]
• Serena Williams returns to the Home Shopping Network to sell her line of clothing today. Last time the tennis star did the HSN rounds, her goods sold out in under three hours. How? "Everything in the collection is under $100," Williams explains. "And everything you get from me [is] great quality. I think for those prices and [this] quality, it is a no-brainer." Do you hear that? A no-brainer. It's not buying her clothes that really defies explanation. [People]
• The family that owns Salvatore Ferragamo bought a decrepit estate with a vineyard in Tuscany in 1993. The restoration process now complete, Ferragamo is now introducing four wines into the U.S. market, ranging in price from $15-$80 per bottle. They do not carry the family name trademark, because that would be so vulgar. [BW]
• Project Runway alumnus Rami Kashou has been dressing Queen Rania of Jordan. His spring collection is partly inspired by Frank Gehry. [LATimes]
• Knitwear designer Carmen Colle's lawsuit against Chanel has been thrown out by a Paris court. Colle's company, World Tricot, which designs new knitting and crochet patterns for various designer clients to incorporate into their runway looks, sued Chanel in 2004 when she spied a Chanel coat made from what she alleged was a World Tricot crochet pattern that Chanel had rejected, and never paid for. But it wasn't all bad news for Colle. World Tricot also sued for breach of contract, after Chanel abruptly stopped patronizing the house. Chanel countersued for besmirching its good name by bringing the suit at all. The court found World Tricot was owed €400,000 for the breach of contract, and it also found that Chanel was owed €200,000 for "commercial prejudice." World Tricot may appeal the forgery ruling. [WSJ]
• Jason Wu was asked if he was for or against brunch. "Pro, but only if it's after 1:30," the designer responded. Who the hell is against brunch? [TFI]
• Christopher Kane clarifies his earlier statements about not liking fashion blogs because designers have little to no control over what they publish. Now he says blogs can be fine, so long as they're not "critical" or "negative": "You're allowed to say what you want but sometimes the blogs that you read are really negative and that's what I meant to say really. Sometimes it's too negative for my liking and I think maybe they could give someone a compliment or say something nice. But bloggers nowadays seem to be a bit negative...but when it gets to someone's work and they're being critical, it's like ‘Give them a break'." [Grazia]
• Unilever has suspended its relationship with a palm oil supplier after Greenpeace alleged that the supplier was not harvesting its oil sustainably. Palm oil is a key ingredient in many cosmetics, but deforestation and environmental destruction can result when farmers slash and burn forests to plant palms. [WWD]

• Today in pointless clothing lines of the stars: Miley Cyrus and Max Azria's Wal-Mart collection! The digs look well worth every penny of their sub-$20 price point. [Lucky]
• Now, even the Kings of Leon has one. [Blackbook]

• Lady Gaga wants in on the action. On starting a clothing line, she told Flare magazine, "At some point, I will. Right now, I'm more concerned with using my fame to promote young designers such as Gary Card, an artist who designed a piece I used on stage." Why would she do such a thing? "There hasn't been a commercial artist lately that has embodied avant-garde and couture so insistently as myself." [ONTD]
• Gaga has one new position to console herself with: M.A.C. Viva Glam AIDS fund face. Cyndi Lauper will co-star in the campaign to sell lipstick and raise money for research. [WWD]
• The British Fashion Council and British Vogue are launching a fashion prize to encourage young talent, somewhat along the lines of the American Vogue/CFDA Fashion Fund awards, which kicked off in 2003. £200,000 will be awarded to one UK designer who can demonstrate he or she has international stockists, a media profile, and demonstrated need of the money. [Telegraph]
• Angelina Jolie and Shiloh are apparently fans of Stella McCartney's line for GapKids. [Radaronline]
• That Christian Louboutin made his first public appearance in Washington, D.C., under Obama's watch is no coincidence. "For eight years I was invited, but I never wanted to come before. I never wanted to come with Bush," says the shoe designer. "I'm looking forward to coming back — at least for four years." We really want to make a crack about voting with your feet here. [WaPo]
• Roberto Cavalli: "All over the world people don't treat me like a fashion designer; they treat me like a rock star… I can't walk down 5th Avenue without being treated like a rock star. In fact, maybe it's more… Many times I've walked down 5th Avenue with rock stars and nobody pays attention to them. It's very strange." [FWD]
• Gisele Bundchen passed the written exam portion of her pilot's license. Although heavily pregnant, and "Almost too big to fly," according to her instructor, she's still making supervised practice flights up to three days a week. [People]
• Karolina Kurkova has given birth to a baby boy. [People]
• Kelly Osborne: Fan of Spanx. [People]
• Christian Siriano says his new reality TV show will reflect the best of several recent high-profile fashion documentaries. "It's very like The September Issue, very Valentino [The Last Emperor]. We want it to be as cool and as real as possible." Apparently, September Issue director R.J. Cutler wouldn't touch the project, but he did advise Siriano "just to be real." [The Cut]
• Sadie Frost's clothing line with Jemima French, FrostFrench, is opening its second store in London's Soho. [WWD]
• A real ad man of the 1960s has some bones to pick with Mad Men's treatment of the brand London Fog. So an employee of an industry that manufactures fictions objects to a fictional show's fictionalizing history? We shake our heads at the irony. [AdAge]
• JC Penney is being sued for trademark infringement by the retailer New York & Company. New York & Company says Penney's new "NYC Style" slogan is too close to its "NY Style" advertising tag line. [WWD]
• Can Sir Philip Green conquer America? [Bloomberg]
• Polo Ralph Lauren reported a 10% rise in second-quarter profits. [TS]
• Bata shoes was, before Communism, an international brand headquartered in Slovakia. The company town isn't doing so hot right now, with the economic transition and the competition from Asia. [BussinessWeek]
• Liz Claiborne may have had seven consecutive quarterly losses, with the announcement of an eight expected next week, but C.E.O. Bill McCombs doesn't have to worry about one thing: his job security. McCombs recently had his contract renewed for another three years. It's not an unusual strategy: only 38 companies in the S&P 500 have replaced their C.E.O.'s in the year to September 30, down 10 on the same period last year, despite the trying economic times. [WSJ]
• Not so lucky is Missoni's general manager, Massimo Gasparini. He has been let go and his position will not be filled. [WWD]

• Here are leaked pictures of Lindsay Lohan's spring campaign for 6126. The images were shot by reality-TV-star photographers Markus Klinko and Indrani. [Gone Hollywood]

• That was quick: Steve Madden has finalized a deal with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen to manufacture shoes and accessories for the pair's new Olsenboye JC Penney's brand. [Crains]
• Francesca Versace, the niece of Donatella and daughter of Santo, was rejected the first time she applied to Central St. Martins. "I went to the London College of Fashion and did business and pattern cutting, which I hated, but reapplied for Saint Martins and finally got in. The first year, I was crying all the time. All the teachers gave me such a hard time." The designer says that, eventually, she started to fit in. "I did three years and I loved it. I had so much fun by the end." Now she lives in London and is best friends with Silvio Berlusconi's daughter. [Times UK]
• The December cover of Harper's Bazaar is rumored to feature Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson. [WWD]
• Sometimes the Daily Mail online headline writers are evil geniuses. "Can Chanel Really Gild This Lily Or Are They Allen A Laugh?" would be one of those times. [Daily Mail]
• Project Runway alum Jeffrey Sebelia is taking his poor-man's-Santino aesthetic to his latest position, as creative director of the casual wear label Fluxus. [WWD]
• The M.A.C.-sponsored fashion shows at Milk Studios will continue at least for the next two years, says Estee Lauder Group president John Demsey. [The Cut]
• Scott Schuman's project for Burberry involved him shooting 100 trench coats, reveals Garance Doré. Included in the post is one of the pictures, of Doré wearing a short navy trench with a Yankees cap. [Garance Doré]
• The Gucci family biopic that Ridley Scott is making has Gucci family members upset. The story he's dramatizing — the intrafamily struggle for control that cost the life of eventual winner Maurizio Gucci, who was killed on his wife's orders just after hiring young designer Tom Ford — does not, they feel, redound to their benefit. "Enough mud," says Patrizia Gucci, Maurizio's cousin. "We have been through horrible things and paid plenty in person. I will write a book about the Guccis to say who they really are. And I will give Scott a copy, in hopes that his movie will never be released." Angelina Jolie is purportedly in talks to play Maurizio's wife. [Variety]
• And with the opening of Mongolia's first Louis Vuitton store, late last month, comes the inevitable trend story about how Ulaan Bator is, like, so hot right now (move over, Paris!). Actually, the warmest praise the capital garners from Louis Vuitton C.E.O. Yves Carcelle is that it is equivalent to "a good-sized provincial town in China." [News.com.au]
• Prada had just nailed down an agreement with its garment workers' union to furlough 250 out of 3,000 workers at its factory for four to six weeks when it announced that the rotating suspensions will only last three weeks. Spring orders outstripped the company's expectations by 10%. [Reuters]
• Gabriel Aubry, the male model who fathered Halle Berry's child, will be the spring face of Louis Vuitton men's wear. [Sassybella]
• Marc Jacobs might do a reality show. "I have very specific ideas about a show and how I'd want it to go, and I'd want it to be really different than the other ones," says the designer. But, "I don't think it's going to happen. I don't think so, unless we came up with the right thing, the right way." He hasn't been in touch with Bravo, who a few weeks back said it was "desperate" to have Jacobs in a show. We'd recommend re-watching Loïc Prigent's Louis Vuitton doc if you're feeling anxious. [The Cut]
• Alexander "I make $390 Italian yarn bike shorts" Wang, on his successful Barneys trunk show last week: "When I got to Barneys, I was welcomed with the news that our Rocco bag had a waiting list of 400-plus. By day's end, their entire Spring 2010 handbag order sold out with pre-buys — and that's before it will even hit the floor. Yikes! Good news, but now we're going to have to figure out how to produce more bags so our section won't be empty come January." A 400-plus person waiting list? Are the bags made of gold? Is it magically charmed so that whatever you wish for, you reach in and, pouf, there it is? Does it buy you drinks after a long day? Because we're struggling to understand what it is that's attractive about a black leather bag with studs on the bottom that costs nearly a grand. [Style.com]

• Heidi Klum's new coffee table book, Rankin's Heidilicious , is "very naughty." Who doesn't want nudity with their coffee? Oh, wait, everyone? [ElleUK]
• American Apparel brings its sleaze to England. England doesn't like it. [The Street]

• The "provocative" American Apparel ad, which appeared, natch, in Vice, involved a model who appeared to be under the legal age of 16. And who was probably wearing crotchless lame jersey bloomers? AA says she's 23. [Daily Mail]
• No, wait, it's a hoodie - unzipped, obviously, and revealing one underaged nip. [Reuters]
• The Advertising Standards Authority has suggested that the vertically-integrated softcore "could be seen to sexualise a model who appeared to be a child." [BBC]
• Fashion weekly Grazia has come to France, sporting Kate Moss. [WWD]
• Speaking of Kate! The much-discussed Paris Kate Moss retrospective has been put on hold for lack of funds. Priorities, people! [Google]
• This is a woman whose latest perfume ad features leather corsets, partial nudity and "fantasy sex!" [Daily Mail]
• And she's appearing on her celebrity stylist best mate's reality show! [GraziaDaily]
• Grazia's hoping to beat Elle in France. But Elle has a secret weapon: Posh Spice's cleavage. [Cocoperez]
• A biography of Laura Ashley - the woman behind the florals - hits tomorrow. The chintz-mongers will be releasing a line of mugs and fancies to correspond to its release. [ElleUK]
• Karl Lagerfeld's cover of Wallpaper: "While Lagerfeld has shot his current muse, Baptiste Giabiconi, clad in a Dior Homme suit for his cover, he's added a layer of paper to the magazine, which those inclined can peel off to reveal Giabiconi naked. Lagerfeld has also shot a 27-page editorial for the title featuring Giabiconi in locales such as the Queen's Theater in Versailles." He's caught the pulse of the times. [WWD]
• Harper's Bazaar bucked the September slump: their secret weapon? Susan Boyle. [Min]
• House of Deréon is taking their glitz to Greece. Cue Trojan Horse joke. [WWD]
• Mary-Kate Olsen on her style? "There was a photo of me with weird sunglasses on and a green sweatshirt, some striped thing, with tights and cowboy boots. Something really random where in some sense it's me. To this day, I have never read the article. I just saw the photo and thought, 'God, I look crazy in that photograph!'" This, is true. [NYPost]
• And speaking of sartorial eccentrics, what's on tap for Betsey Johnson? "I'm going back to my true blue pieces - and couture prom dresses. I'm hoping the clothes will get edgier - more archival and kick-ass shoulder pads. I just want to be more true blue me." Already hating those young girls who will be buying said couture prom dresses. [VogueUK]
• Ruben Toledo on his (amazing) covers for Penguin classics: "I must confess I didn't re-read the books - I never read them in the first place. (I was a really bad student as a kid!) It was great to enter them without a preconceived notion of where the story was going, which really triggered my imagination. I took all three manuscripts with me to Miami Beach last New Year's break and spent time reading under the palm trees." [WWD]
• Oh dear: is Derek Lam having cash-flow issues? Sources say the former CFDA winner is bleeding money, has lazy managers, and is being "propped up" by "Italian investors." Aren't we all. [NYPost]
• Gucci's funding a scholarship promoting the use of "experimental technologies" that will make fashion greener. [WWD]
• Loads of designers are banding together against Chicago retailer Jake, who has apparently stiffed a bunch of them. [WWD]
• Max Azria's going to be doing a guest turn on the terrible-but-compelling-looking new model drama The Beautiful Life. Is this the beginning of serious fashion cred? Given that the other known guest stars are Tory Burch and Tyra, we're gonna go with "no." [People]
• House's Olivia Wilde is the face of new Escada scent "Desire Me." Quoth the good doctor, "For me, Escada represents style, refinement and sensuality. I like to think of myself as being an Escada woman, and I think that the majority of women aspire to these admirable qualities that this perfumes so perfectly represents." This said, the ad is very cheesy and kinda looks like it was shot in 1993. [Sassybella]
• Speaking of what every woman allegedly wants to be, Megan Fox is said to be the next face of Armani perfume. [Fashionologie]
• She'd be replacing Beyonce? WTF? [NY]
• Mad Men makeup tips: "A great start would be lining the top lash line only with a gel liner like M·A·C Fluidline...We love this product for recreating the perfect '60s eye. Replacing gloss and sheer or shimmer lipsticks with matte reds, bright pinks, and corals help create a more retro look." So does a cocktail and a Winston. [People]
• Tiffany's doing great. In point of fact, they've kicked Wal-Mart's ass. [WSJ]

• Twilight clothing is happening — it's only surprising it took so long. The duds go on sale at Nordstrom in October. Selina Khan, on the right, looks like she just doesn't care about Edward or Jacob, bless her heart. [People]

• Amazon.com is acquiring Zappos.com. The cost? $847 million. [NYTimes]
• Wonder Woman Lynda Carter will be live in person at Talbot's for Fashion Night Out, a night of special sales and events designed to encourage consumers to shop at the start of New York Fashion Week. Carter will be at Talbot's Madison Avenue store to promote her new CD, "At Last." [WWD]
• Meanwhile, France is one step closer to allowing shops to open on Sundays after the bill was narrowly approved by the senate. Mon dieu! [WWD]
• Barney's New York took down a disturbing window display that featured bloodied mannequins, posed as though they were struggling against assailants. And here we thought Simon Doonan's judgment was impeccable in all things. [NYDN]
• The actress Melissa George has invented a new product which she calls "HemmingMyWay." Geddit! The Grey's star, along with her business partner Kara Harshbarger, plans to sell clear adhesive strips with snaps affixed that allow a wearer to quickly adjust the length of her pants when she changes from flats to heels. Look, it even has a Facebook page! [WWD]
• Amy Winehouse's father wants her to license her name to a perfume house for £500,000. [Telegraph]
• And Lily Allen is doing a line of jewelry. "I love jewelry, always have done," explains the pop star. [Vogue UK]
• A 1994 Arte documentary about Yves Saint Laurent, Tout Terriblement, is being released on DVD. [WWD]
• In London next Thursday, a Chanel-themed flash mob has been announced. Anyone wearing Chanel, or Chanel-esque outfits should meet like-minded sartorial souls at St. Pancras International Station at 6 p.m. [UK Elle]
• 19-year-old Georgian Sean O'Pry topped Forbes' list of the highest-earning male models. There are pictures. [Forbes]
• Retail executives' pay fell last year. The 10 top-earning executives compensation packages decreased by 9.4%. [WWD]
• Could Fabiola Beracasa really be developing a reality show in the style of Anthony Bourdain's No Reservations, where she flies around the world looking for...unusual fashion? [P6]
• Daniel Vosovic, Santino Rice, Korto Momolu, Sweet P, Jeffrey Sebelia, Uli Herzner, Mychael Knight and Chris March are the designers returning to Project Runway for a second helping of Tim Gunn's soothing drone and Heidi Klum's adenoidal exhortations. Project Runway: All-Star Challenge will be broadcast as a two-hour special before the show's sixth season premiere. All we want to know is whatever happened to Andrae? [People]
• Jeremy Scott is yet another designer heading to London Fashion Week this fall. Though based in Los Angeles, Scott normally shows in Paris. [WWD]
• MAC cosmetics is ending its sponsorship of fashion week, and instead holding its own competing roster of shows at Milk studios in Chelsea. Proenza Schouler, Erin Fetherston, and Alexander Wang have already committed to slots in the lineup. [NYTimes]
• Alex Wang on his day off, according to his friend Ryan Korban: "We do a lot of driving around - he loves driving. So we drive out to Brooklyn and just kind of cruise around. He's always got the music blasting and he's singing. It's surprising, but he's a really good driver. He's screaming and the music is to the max and he's drinking an iced coffee, but he's completely steady." [W]
• Esteban Cortazar is out at Emanuel Ungaro, WWD is reporting. The young Colombian designer had clashed with the house's management over advertising and the brand's direction; his collections met with mixed reviews, and at last month's resort show, the Ungaro CEO refused to say if Cortazar would be kept on. No successor has yet been named. [WWD]
• The quirky downtown gallery Partners & Spade got written about in the Times. Oh well — nothing good lasts forever. [NYTimes]
• Ozwald Boateng, the Ghana-born, London-based all-round spectacular menswear designer and tailor, made two suits for President Obama and hand-delivered them to the American ambassador to Ghana during the president's recent visit. If Obama wore Boateng's suits, nobody would call him frumpy, ever. [WWD]
• Another story about Crocs and what they mean. [LATimes]
• The New York Economic Development Corporation-run industry site NYCFashionInfo.com, which collates insidery arcana like designer showroom contacts and market week dates, might start accepting advertising and publishing more "lifestyle content" because it only attracts 2,000 visitors a month. [WWD]
• Apparel sales in England in the month of June rose by 1.2%. [FT]
• Skechers lost $5.9 million in the second quarter. The result was actually better than analysts had expected. [WWD]>

• Designer Oscar de la Renta says Hillary Clinton, whom he's dressing for the Inaugural ball, is "very prudish about the type of clothes she likes to wear." It's a constant battle! [People]

• Fergie's MAC campaign is — how do we put this? —scary. [Oh No They Didn't]
• “Did you know there’s dissent in the Gossip Girl wardrobe closet? The main costume designer is clashing with the other stylists and producers on set because they think he’s making Blake look like a “trashy whore” and they’re convinced he was responsible for her awful Golden Globes dress." [Fashionista]
• Showing a total disregard for celebrity morale, every designer seems to be canceling their fashion week parties. [WWD]
• As the financial crisis hits the luxe market hard, both Elizabeth Arden and Estee Lauder cut their profit views. [Reuters]
• Alexander McQueen and Puma are teaming up for a (tartan?!) sportswear line. [WWD]
• Edina Monsoon, take note: Christian Lacroix is selling his Paris apartment for about $2.6 million. [WSJ]
• If you were panting to see the spawn of Keith Richards, Carly Simon and James Taylor shill for Lucky jeans (us neither), sorry, Charlie, you'll have to go online. [WWD]
• Optimism? Red herring? Either way, Project Runway is on the fashion week schedule, and we want to believe! [Blogging Project Runway]
• Dolce and Gabbana's long-awaited foray into cosemtics happens next month. [WWD]
• Wait for it: Alexander Wang's diffusion line is actually cheap! [New York]
• Jonathan Rhys Meyers, currently ludicrous for Hugo Boss cologne, will be the legs of New Energie jeans. [WWD]
• Stetson, us, wants Obama to wear a fedora to the Inaugural. We can all dream on. [Brand Freak]
• Oy: Saks is laying of 1,100 employees. That's 9% of its workforce. [WWD]
• And yet Uggs, the cockroach of the clothing world, are still doing better than ever! [Telegraph]
• Michael Pitt's doing the short film thin for designer Stefano Pilati. [WWD]
• And in real news, Calvin Klein is wrangling with the preservation board over overhaulin' his Hamptons waterfront home. [Media Bistro]

• Moddle Erin Wasson declares that in '09, "I'm definitely devoting myself to saving and adopting more animals... Yes, I can only imagine how crowded my house will be by 2010!" [Refinery29]

• Abigail Lorick's '09 plans are closer to home: "My New Year's resolution is to get health insurance. And to be more selfless." [Refinery29]
• Daisy Lowe, Gwen-Stefani's sorta-stepdaughter and Mark Ronson's sorta-girlfriend, looks appropriately It-Girly in her new Marc by Marc Jacobs ads. [Sassybella]
• Anthropologie, in a continuing bid to pretend not to be a major conglomerate, launches in-store craft workshops. Says the chief merchandising officer (CMO?), they “aren’t designed to sell anything...We wanted to share something really personal, which is our creative side, on a one-on-one level,” and it's not their fault that they're surrounded by stuff people can buy! [WWD]
• I know everyone's saying "Mimosa" is the new black for '09...but what no one seems to get? People like black because we can actually wear it. [BoingBoing]
• Things have gotten so bad that the Liz Claiborne CEO is flying coach. Not being sarcastic; it's bad enough without knowing what you're missing. [WSJ]
• Thakoon is pleased about Michelle Obama sporting his resortwear: “A print dress? On TV?” Panichgul notes puckishly. “There’s change you can believe in.” [Style.com]
• Amid turmoil, American Apparel names new CFO. Worse still, the Wall Street Journal refers to them as "a teen retailer." [WSJ]
• Slate's "Explainer" tells us what to do if our synthetic clothing melts to our body. Having read it, we'd rather just avoid having it happen. [Slate]
• Clothing manufacturers want stores to absorb the losses caused by slashed holiday prices. This is a no-win, fellas. [Reuters]
• We're all for Phil Collins' daughter starting an accessories line for a good cause, but when we were 19? We did a lot with volunteering. [WWD]
• Dame Edna is digging her gig as a MAC face. Quoth the drag diva: "I'm very lucky, because I do have fantastic skin...I'm sure Liz Hurley is a very nice girl, but it's time for her, Isabella Rossellini and Nicole Kidman to move over. Those girls are all passé now – tragically for them." [Telegraph]
• Bar Rafaeli, moddle and DiCaprio squeeze, draws shoot out, makes photographer miss dinner. [Fox News]

The interview — published in three parts — is by no means a hit job, but Strozzi does dish on the tricks of her trade. Like, despite a specific request from Palin that Strozzi utilize Palin's personal foundation — Revlon Age Defying Makeup with Botafirm in Medium Beige, by the way — Strozzi cheated and mixed in her own preference, Georgio Armani Luminous Silk Foundation. Not that Palin needed to be covered up quite the way her running mate did:

I have said this to just about everyone I speak to...the Governor's skin is the most beautiful skin I have ever worked with. Of course, makeup always helps to create an even canvas, but the condition of her skin was flawless. I attribute it to the clean Alaskan air, lots of fresh fish and protein, and a good fitness regime.

Or that picture in the attic, either way.

Oh, and those long eyelashes? If you didn't guess, they're as fake as the ones in the TV commercials. Strozzi says:

Also, she got very accustomed to the individual lashes I would put on her every morning....which, unfortunately are not so easy to do yourself!

Guess that made the winking sexier, right?

Strozzi does shoot down the rumors that Palin's lipliner is tattooed on — she says that she used "an automatic L'Oreal pencil in Nudes, which we covered the lip with and then put a gloss over it." But, if you're a woman whose ever worn lip liner with a shiny gloss, I'll bet you already knew that rumor was false, didn't you? Lip liners always outlast anything else you put on your lips.

Although Strozzi's make-up kit was limited due to space limitations, she does dish on what she regularly applied to Palin, which we've priced out below:

Foundation:
Armani Luminous Silk Foundations: $58.00 (Saks Fifth Ave.)
Revlon Age Defying Makeup with Botafirm: $12.99 (on sale for $11.69 at drugstore.com)

Powder:
Unlisted brand, though Strozzi says "we" switched to oil free face powder when the days began to get increasing long." Given Strozz's penchant for going high-end on products that could clog one's pores, we'll say she spent $30 on each of 2 different powders at a department store (which is generous, considering how much Armani's powders retail for).

Blush:
MAC blush in Gingerly and Cubic: $18.00 each (MAC)
Chanel blush in Horizon and Narcisse: $42.00 each (Saks Fifth Avenue)

Eyes
L'Oreal Voluminous mascara: $6.99 (drugstore.com)
Individual fake eyelashes: (estimate: $14 for Make Up Forever at Sephora but prices vary)
Chanel eyeshadow quads in Variations and Beiges de Chanel: $56.00 each (Saks Fifth Avenue)
MAC single shadows in Amber Lights and Romp: $14.50 each (MAC)
Sephora Slim Eye pencils in Dark Brown, Chocolate Brown, and Black: $5.00 each (Sephora)

Lips:
automatic L'Oreal pencil in nudes: $7.85 (drugstore.com)
lip gloss: prices vary — but since Strozzi won't spill until she launches her own blog, we're guessing it's not from CVS, and will price this at $30.

So, given that Strozzi probably had a couple of mascaras and glosses, multiple boxes of eyelashes and a couple of things she didn't mention, we estimate that just 10 weeks worth of makeup for Sarah Palin cost between $700 and $1,000. Of course, compared to the $35,000 the campaign spent on Strozzi's services through mid-October, that's a pittance — but it's probably more than some of us have spent on makeup in a lifetime.

Q&A With Sarah Palin's Makeup Artist, Amy Strozzi! [Talking Shopping]
Who's the Fairest of Them All? Amy Says It's Sarah Palin [Talking Shopping]
The Beauty Products Behind Sarah Palin's Look! [Talking Shopping]

Related: Top Salary in McCain Camp? Palin’s Makeup Stylist [NY Times]
The Picture of Dorian Gray [Wikipedia]
Is Sarah Palin's Lipliner A Tattoo? [Huffington Post]

Earlier: John McCain's Make-Up Artist

• It's official: Thierry Mugler will be costuming Beyonce's tour. "In addition to serving as 'creative adviser,' with input on everything from set lighting to choreography, Mugler will direct three segments of the show, called 'Dangerously in Love,' 'Ave Maria' and the finale. He’ll also costume the production — from the star herself, who will wear approximately 58 Mugler creations, to the band, back-up dancers and singers." [WWD]
• Michelle Obama is fashion's new favorite doll! "The American fashion industry hasn’t had a catch this big since, well, since another icon of Democratic chic took up residency on Pennsylvania Avenue in 1961." [WWD]
• And don't forget playing virtual dress-up with Sasha and Malia! [WWD]
• Naomi Campbell on her Miami retrospective: “It’s an honor to have your timeline in your career mapped out, and to be asked to be part of such a prestigious week is quite overwhelming." [New York Times]

• Fashion Week may be seriously subdued: think "presentations" instead of runway shows. [WWD]
• As rumors swirl over Anna Wintour's possible retirement, the knives are out! "She's had to put up with an unbelievable amount of nastiness, mainly from female journalists because of jealousy," claims one defender. [Independent]
• Yes! Iconic Aussie drag queen Dame Edna is MAC's new muse! [Independent]
• The new line of "Lanvin dolls" is, disappointingly, more like porcelain statuettes, "a hark back to Jeanne Lanvin's partaking in the post-war Theâtre de la Mode show which saw French couturiers showcasing their designs through miniature dolls, due to the lack of fabric." The outfits are still cool, though. [Dazed Digital]
• Speaking of playing dress-up: Alberta Ferretti enters the virtual world of Stardoll. "Without question, Philosophy di Alberta Ferretti’s Stardoll suite is the game’s classiest — and of course, most expensive — shopping destination. In the Philosophy boutique, you can you scope out, try on, and “buy” select pieces from the label’s Fall 2008 collection. Before you dress your avatar in the Goth Lolita-tinged finery, take note of the ensembles conveniently “modeled” by virtual showroom rep Zelda Williams (yes, Robin’s teenaged daughter)." [Sassybella]
• A new Brooklyn plus-sized vintage boutique is the first of its kind. [Racked]
• Donatella Versace "travels everywhere with her inner circle of bodyguard, hairstylist, make-up artist and a handsome French pony-tailed assistant called Bruce," even to do earthquake relief in China. [TimesOnline]
• "If Virginia Woolf were alive today, one fashion critic observed, she would wear Nicole Farhi." Or not. [Telegraph]
• Zac Posen is doing a diffusion line! We don't know with whom! [Fashionista]
• Earnest Sewn's so-called "recession-proof" store is all under $50! [Style.com]
• Hop can "beauty hospitals" no longer exist? [Peculiar Beauty]
• The Pussycat Dolls' lingerie — outerwear? — hits Bebe. “I designed this line specifically for women to feel empowered, strong, feminine, sexy and a little naughty if they’re feeling it,” said (visionary) Robin Antin. [WWD]
• Calvin Klein's futuristic take on menswear classics are...like futuristic versions of clothes. [Esquire]
• Jack of all trades Karl Lagerfeld gets behind the lens, shooting Eva Herzigova for a calendar. “It’s about how one girl can be every woman. It’s an idea I love,” quoth the Kaiser. [WWD]

• John Mayer on his breakup with Jen Aniston: "There's no lying, there's no cheating, there's no nothing. Jennifer Aniston is the smartest, most sophisticated person I think I have ever met. People are different, people have different chemistry. I ended a relationship to be alone, because I don't want to waste somebody's time if something's not right." Hmm, does Mayer The Player have commitmentphobia? [People, UPI]
• John Mayer also says: "I'm sorry that the story's not interesting. But it's about time that somebody stands up for that girl and I think she's great." [OK!]
• Um, there's also video of John making these statements. He actually seems emotional. [TMZ]
• Okay, this report says that though they're going through a rocky time, John and Jen are not over. Then again, it also claims that "the birth of the Brangelina twins has got her down." Ugh. [The Sun]
• This report says that money was an issue with Jen and John. "Jen was tired of paying for everything," says a source. "Cobwebs come flying out of (Mayer's) wallet when he opens it. John liked living like a movie star when he was with her. Jen would never say anything, but you could tell it irritated her." [MSNBC]
• Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi tied the knot! The private ceremony took place at their home in Los Angeles. There were 19 guests, including both of their mothers. [Yahoo News]

• Ellen and Portia both wore Zac Posen. They exchanged rings by Neil Lane. The couple said handwritten vows. Sniff. [People]
• Oooh, you can see Portia's fluffy pink dress here. A source called it a "Cinderella tutu." [Us]
• A crowd of 6,000 people gathered on Chicago's South Side to remember Bernie Mac on Saturday. Samuel L. Jackson spoke at the church and said: "He never turned that kid down for an autograph. He always had time to shake a hand. He was always that kid from Chicago who wanted to make everybody happy and everybody laugh." [CNN]
• Meanwhile, a Presbyterian Church in Memphis is being criticized for holding a memorial for Scientologist Isaac Hayes. [UPI]
• Madonna's 50th birthday was Saturday. She spent the day praying at the Kabbalah center before hitting a London nightclub. [Mirror]
• In other news, doesn't look like Madonna will be adopting that little girl in Malawi. Although we'll surely hear something different tomorrow. [The Sun]
• Meanwhile: Guy Ritchie's script adviser has been charged with possessing more than £100,000 worth of cocaine and cannabis. At least he knows his stuff. [Daily Mail]
• Tyra Banks kept her audience waiting for two hours for a taping of "Celebrating Black Models, Past, Present and Future" while she was backstage "giggling, snacking and chatting with the crew." At the end of the show, Tyra and some other models released black balloons, which, as we all know, kill sea life. Anyway, a source says the whole show was "self-indulgent, narcissistic crap." [Page Six]
• Phil Collins has divorced third wife Orianne Cevey after six years of marriage and two children. He's paid her £25 million, more than Paul McCartney gave Heather Mills. [Mirror]
• Harry Potter star Daniel Radcliffe suffers from dyspraxia, a neurological problem which impairs movement. His spokesperson says his condition is mild and "at worst manifests itself in an inability to tie his shoe laces and bad handwriting." [Daily Mail]
• Courtenay Semel is spilling details about her relationship with Lindsay Lohan: "Everyone thinks Samantha is Lindsay’s first lesbian love, but we were very passionate until her fear of being found out drove us apart," she says. Apparently Courtnenay and LL would do lines of coke, then go home and "fall into bed together." You know, Star was on to LL's "roomate" Courtenay months ago! [News Of The World]
• Courtenay also claims that Lindsay slept with a bunch of dudes to suppress her lesbian urges. [The Sun]
• Was Peaches Geldof's quickie Vegas wedding a publicity stunt for the groom's rock band? The group, Chester French, was unknown in the UK before the wedding; now they have five gigs: Sheffield tomorrow night, followed by Birmingham, Manchester, Edinburgh and London. [Mirror]
• Peaches has gone to visit her father, who will surely quiz her about what the hell is going on. [The Sun]
• By the by, Peaches' new hubs doesn't know who Sir Bob Geldof is, so that should go over well. [Mirror]
• Oh, dear. There's a picture of Peaches licking the face of Mark The Cobrasnake. [Daily Mail]
• Did Peaches get married because she was depressed? Is she still scarred from the death of her mother eight years ago? [The Sun]
• Amy Winehouse has become obsessed with The Wizard Of Oz and is using a sample of music from the film in one of her new tracks. Clearly, she loves the scene that's all, "Poppies… poppies!" [The Sun]
• Gossip Girl gossip: The first season comes out on DVD this week, with an audiobook narrated by Christina Ricci. Except no one likes audiobooks, especially not GG fans. [NY Times]
• Bill Murray jumped out of a plane on Friday. The 57-year-old actor leapt from 13,500 feet with members of the Army Golden Knights Parachute Team. When Murray landed, he said: "I really feel like having a drink." [AP]
• Paris Hilton's extensions were extremely obvious on the red carpet at a recent event. [UPI]
• View said extensions here. [ONTD]
• Jared Leto's band, 30 Seconds To Mars, is being sued by its label, Virgin Records, for not delivering three albums as required by contract. More time in the studio, less time on eyeliner, guys. [AP]
• Blind item! "Which hunk in a summer movie is a violent, closeted homosexual? The heartthrob snuck into his ex's apartment a few months ago and raped him so violently, the ex ended up in the hospital — and the actor paid him $500,000 to keep his mouth shut." [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which oft-photographed socialite is being forced to get a job by her parents? She looks rich but is really broke, and is now looking for modeling gigs." [Page Six]
• Drama in the Black Eyed Peas! Fergie's too busy shooting a movie to commit to a tour schedule. [Page Six]
• Celebs at the DNC? George Clooney, Madonna, Kanye West, Scarlett Johansson, Susan Sarandon, Spike Lee, Quentin Tarantino and Matt Damon all wanna be there when Barack Obama says, "Yes, I can." [Rush & Molloy]
• Kim Kardashian performed with the Pussycat Dolls in Vegas on Friday and used iChat to show boyfriend Reggie Bush what she looked like in her costume. Yeah, she knows how to video chat. Be afraid. [People]
• Everything you need to know about Lo Bosworth's role on The Hills: "A subtle intelligence is Lo's saving grace. It's all there in her withering gaze, usually directed away from her target, and possibly in whatever she's always typing into her cellphone." [L.A. Times]
• Sixteen-year-old Georgia Jagger won't let mom Jerry Hall wear anything inappropriate. "I did take all her miniskirts. I told her one night that her skirt was too short – she came down the stairs and I was like, 'God, Mum, you are 50.'" [Daily Mail]
• Entourage star Emmanuelle Chriqui was one of the many patrons of an L.A. nightclub who came out coughing when someone set off pepper spray. [TMZ]
• Mark Frith, editor of Heat magazine, has a book about what it's like to run a tabloid readers love and stars hate. An excerpt: "Jude Law's lawyer calls again. 'We've reason to believe you're planning to run some photographs that you don't have permission to run. When does the magazine print?' 'It already has.' Silence. Then he tells me our lawyers will be getting a letter." [Daily Mail]
• Somebody stole stuff out of the Dancing With The Stars van when it was in Roseville, MN. [UPI]
• Is Avril Lavigne too sexy for Malaysia? [Yahoo News]
• Patrick Swayze continues to smoke. [The Sun]
• Robert Wagner has talked to a friend about the night Natalie Wood died. [Times of London]
• Headline of the day: "Even when he was kissing me, Warren Beatty could not resist staring at himself in the mirror." [Daily Mail]
• "I'd like an Oscar, I think, and I'd also like to have been the face of a big cosmetics company, like Chanel or one of the others. You know what, I am actually going to say I'd like an Oscar nomination rather than an Oscar. I don't want to jinx it." — Emma Roberts. [News.com.au]
• "I saw The Dark Knight. I'm like, 'That's not my idea of what I want to see in a movie.' I loved The Prestige but didn't understand The Dark Knight. Didn't get it, still can't tell you what happened in the movie, what happened to the character… I'm like, 'I get it. This is so high-brow and so fucking smart, I clearly need a college education to understand this movie. You know what? Fuck DC comics. That's all I have to say and that's where I'm really coming from." — Robert Downey Jr. [MSNBC]

• Wacko Jacko is teaming up with Ed Hardy designer Christian Audigier to launch a new line this fall. The apparently delusional Frenchman says, “It’s the merging of the King of Pop with the king of fashion. Something explosive is going to happen.” Kitson, for some reason, has committed to carrying the line exclusively. Like all Michael Jackson news, this is somehow deeply depressing. [People]
• Um, Michael's sister Janet is also doing a line, apparently. Starting with lingerie. Insert "wardrobe malfunction" joke here. Oh, wait, Perez Hilton already did. [Perez Hilton]
• A spotlight fell on the head of a male model walking in Tom Ford's Milan show. Insert...no, don't. [Fashionista]
• Nelson Mandela has personally banned serenity-challenged Naomi Campbell from the stage of his 90th birthday concert! Campbell was wearing a "46664" baseball cap at the time of her arrest (Mandela's prison number during his 27-year stint behind bars and the emblem of his current anti-AIDS initiative), which Mandela found "disappointing" given that he personally counseled her following her last brush with the law/cellphone/maid. [Daily Mail]

• Perhaps Naomi will take comfort from this news: "...lawmakers are proposing to give supermodels their own category of work visa. This is especially bold because while easing the way for several hundred models to work during New York's Fashion Week, they must resolutely ignore the pleas of high-tech businesses seeking more visas for well-educated workers." [LA Times]
• "Consumer confidence hits 16-year low." [WWD]
• Dragon fruit is the latest snake oil. [New York Magazine]
• File under 'curiously appropriate meeting of psuedo-hipster mediocrities': Agyness Deyn is dating one of the Strokes. [Perez Hilton]
• Just when you thought they couldn't get any uglier: Crocs 2.0 [Blackbook]
• MAC, Emanuel Ungaro team up for new makeup line. [Gisele Bundchen about eating disorders is like talking with a pro athlete about steroids." [Newser]
• Expectant mother Angelina Jolie apparently has no need for the teeny-tiny black leather getup she wears in her new flick, Wanted. She's auctioning it at CharityFolks.com, where it's expected to fetch about three grand. Proceeds benefit a charity of Morgan Freeman's that helps communities prepare for natural disasters. [E!]
• Tom Ford flouts recession, beating sales budget by 100%. [IHT]
• "King of Bling" "Jacob the Jeweler" goes to jail for money-laundering. [WWD]
• Chinese sportswear's Olympic ambitions flouted. [Wall Street Journal]
• Fashionistas really, really need to stop talking politics. [Guardian]
• Parisian "concept store" Colette opens pop-up store in New York! [Fashionista]
• Brit It-girl and Gwen Stefani sorta-stepdaughter Daisy Lowe on her style: "Like a fairy pixie doll, but with a little bit of a vintage twist. Like a dirty fairy. I like to mix it up—old vintage fabric dresses with exotic Tibetan jewelry, flowers, headbands, that sort of thing." [Refinery29]
• After rough patch, Thierry Mugler on the upswing. [WWD]

• Gwen Stefani's soon-to-be-released Harajuku Lovers fragrance collection comes with dolls that look just like her own Harajuku girl back-up dancers. WTF. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• OMG is Britney Spears going to "collaborate" on a clothing line with Ed Hardy? Like whoah. [Star]
  
• The newest Donatella-designed Versace watch retails for $226,800. Says Donatella: "Women don't really need a watch to tell time today — they have their cell phones and BlackBerries." You heard it straight from the horse's mouth: It's expensive shit you don't need. [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Why does making your own deodorant actually sound like fun? [BellaSugar]

• More expensive shit: Armani luggage. [WWD, sub req'd]
• And more still: Pictures of Kate Moss's face. [Vogue UK]
• So-called upscale beauty brands Clarins, Kiehl's, Origins, Bare Escentuals and Bumble and Bumble are now selling their wares through so-called not-upscale mass retailer Target. The brands are all nervous about diluting their image. Don't they know? Getting something at Target is the new getting something at Bloomingdale's. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Why do watch brands need "ambassadors"? Um, here is an essay that explains it. [Financial Times]
• Bras: Big business in Britain. [Telegraph]
• Speaking of which, Agent Provocateur has relaunched their website and it is "steamy" and "raunchy" and "seamy." Enjoy! [Telegraph]
• For those of you deeply concerned about where all of Carla Bruni's clothes are coming from, rest assured: her rep says, that she "either borrows or buys. And it's all her personal budget. It's not the state budget. The same goes for her hair and makeup." [WWD, sub req'd]
• The amazing Chan Marshall (aka Cat Power) on being a "muse" to Karl Lagerfeld: "I don't think I'm a muse. I'm just like... A regular, maybe. Just a character in Karl's world." [Fashion Week Daily]
• Aw, tear! Hearst is starting a website called DonateMyDress.org where real-life Serena van der Woodsens can donate their old clothes to real-life Jenny Humphreys. No chance in hell the Blair Waldorfs are going to get in on the act. [WWD, 3rd item]
• Kim Stewart is the "face" of Ciate's paint pots, aka nail polish. When you see Kim Stewart, is a manicure is the first thing you think of? [Kiss And Makeup]
• The NYPD had a good time in Queens last night, confiscating $5.5 million in fake Burberry, Chanel, Coach, Fendi, Kate Spade, Gucci and Prada bags. [WWD, sub req'd]
• MAC is opening up something called a Pro Store that isn't just retail, but an "educational center" as well. Hmm, smells like a ruse to get you to spend more time at the counter, and more money on expensive shit. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Christian Louboutin: Now doing resort footwear. [Fashion Week Daily]
• This is what I look like in sunglasses. [Coutorture]

• Anna Wintour claims she is very concerned about how "pale and thin" the models look nowadays. Don't worry, Anna, next to you they look vibrant and full of color! [WWD, 4th item]
  
• Here's your public service announcement of the day: The ingredient 1,4-Dioxane, which is found in many organic beauty and cleaning products, has been found to be carcinogenic. Go de-green your home now. Just don't mix any ammonia with chlorine in the process! [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• "You could say the baseball cap comes from a jockey cap worn by a Russian princess in the 1760s," says milliner Nasir Mazhar. [Vogue UK]
  
• Designer Giles Deacon says if he wasn't a designer he would be a zookeeper. [Independent]
  
• Ghanian businessman Kwabena Osei Bonsu making handbags from plastic litter he finds strewn throughout Accra. We don't normally endorse "handbag designer" as a profession, but that's kind of cool. I wonder if you could make handbags out of "space junk"? [Independent]

• Whoah USB port engagement rings; I totally want one. For my right hand of course. [Chic Report]
• Oh phew: Hermes profits are up. [WWD, sub req'd]
• MAC and Heatherette: Doing a makeup line together. Oh, Lydia Hearst is going to be all over this shit. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Former Chloe designer Phoebe Philo is apparently itching for a new design gig. [WWD, 2nd item]
• And 6267 designers Tommaso Aquilano and Roberto Rimondi are rumored to be taking over the reins at Gianfranco Ferre. [WWD, 5th item]
• Ossie Clark's widow Celia Birtwell is designing a limited-edition capsule collection for...Express. Uh, yeah, that'll save your languishing business, Express. [WWD, sub req'd]
• OMG the suspense is killing us; Will Carla Bruni wear Chanel or Dior when visiting UK PM Gordon Brown and his wife with new husband French president Nicolas Sarkozy next week? [WWD, 3rd item]
• Hot deal alert: A $3,509 python skin laptop bag. [Chic Report]

How gross are the testers? Which ones are safe to try?

Well, testers in general are always sort of borderline gross. This is why you should get a sample from a Sephora cast member whenever possible. We have drawers and drawers full of them, and every client is supposed to leave the store with three samples. Lately we've all been living in fear of being "shopped," which is when someone working for the company poses as a client and then reports back to corporate about how the cast member did. If someone won't give you samples, that's really fucked up of them first of all, but it's also a big company no-no. This gets tricky with Color World. Makeup samples are harder to give out, but we have a few, so you should always ask. But the testers are always going to be the testers and people are always going to do what they do with them no matter where you are. I've seen people do some really gnarly things with the testers. The best is when they stick their dirty fingers right into the pots of face cream and rub it all over their faces in huge amounts in the middle of the store. Sometimes the jar is getting kind of empty and they're all in there trying to dig it out. People who are sort of possibly homeless-ish play with all the testers. I've seen tons of people pick lipsticks up off the displays and put them directly on their lips. When we see this, we're supposed to discreetly get rid of the sample and put out a fresh one, but you can't be everywhere at once so we miss things. We're also supposed to direct everyone to one of the hygiene stations with all the disposable applicators, but they don't always listen. That's also sort of why the hygiene station is there—so you can personally do something to avoid getting in on other people's nasty shit.

When will Fort Wayne, Indiana get a Sephora store?

How the fuck am I supposed to know? I am extremely busy working a register and stocking shelves and putting Prevage in my mouth. I have no idea. Call 1-877-SEPHORA. It'll get you somewhere, although I don't know where that somewhere would be.

What's the best way to get the cast members to actually help you instead of standing around talking to each other?

Ooh, they call that a "black cloud." Because we all wear black, you know, and if too many of us are standing around together, it's like we're going to rain on people's shopping experience. You shouldn't be having a hard time getting a cast member's attention or getting them to help you, and there aren't supposed to be black clouds out on the stage. Obviously black clouds happen, customer service is not perfect, blah blah blah. If you call a store and ask for Leadership, someone will very patiently listen to you complain, be really nice about it, and then probably hang up the phone and talk shit on you. Also, you're complaining about someone who is probably going to leave the company within six months anyway. This job is for children who like eye shadow. You might be able to kind of get some of them in trouble by doing this, but probably not.

What do you think about the Sephora brand eye shadows?

I like them. I use them. They have really pretty colors, and I like the texture of the creamier ones a lot. I think that sometimes, people expect them to be more highly pigmented than they are. They look like they're going to be these really bold colors, but then they go on a little more sheerly. If you want a more pigmented eye shadow, look for companies that are making those. MAC is sort of the gold standard for highly pigmented eye shadows... but I mean, MAC is no joke. Drag queens and movie sets use it. Highly pigmented is what they do. Definitely try stuff out on your hand before you buy it if you're not sure what it does. Or just return it. Sephora brand everything is kind of "meh." The brushes and stuff are cool, but the products are all really middle-of-the-line and not that exciting, especially compared to the other lines we carry.

Why are you so eager to stay at this job, get the training, and learn more? Are you an esthetician or just between jobs, or what?

Okay, what you don't understand is this: I got home from work a few hours ago and I feel like I just mainlined $3000 worth of the best drug imaginable straight into my brain. You would have to love products as much as I do to be able to stand working here. I give myself a facial every night. Ask me about my Kinerase collection. It's sick. No, I'm not an esthetician, yes, I am perfectly capable of holding down a better job. I just like my kind of crack. It's my shit. I'm working here to fuel my fancy skin care addiction. I just realized everyone who works here is eighteen. I asked them, "how can you afford to work here?" And they said, "I live with my parents." Even this woman who works here who is forty and divorced — she lives with her mom. We are all here for the same reason.

Have you always been addicted to beauty products?

Ever since I came down with adult-onset cystic acne about ten years ago. I am a very vain person, the type of person who will stay inside my house and not go into work and refuse to see my closest friends if I have a bad breakout. It is sick. But there is something so sad and homeless about acne. It just looks like something is wrong. That's why I love helping someone who comes in and looks like shit. There is a feminine joy I get from being able to say, here, I know a lot about this and I can help you. Because I can. I have dabbled in everything. I am hardcore. I will try your homeopathic aspirin-raw honey mask. I will take your supplements; I will spend hundreds of dollars on credit on fancy products and I will let you stick your acupuncture needles in me. I also don't pussyfoot around; I believe it's gonna look worse before it looks better. And I do not let obstacles stand in my way: at my lowest point — I can't believe I did this but at my lowest point I would routinely go to a dermatologist and get cortisone shots in my cystic acne. And I would watch where he stuck the needles and when he left the room I would steal a bunch of syringes and do it on myself at night.

Why does corporate Sephora call insults "gifts?" How do they get away with it?

Most of the people who work here are teenagers and they are happy to not be working at McDonald's. This is how they get away with it. As to the why of this issue, my best guess is that it's called a "gift" in an attempt to put a positive spin on what could be construed—let's face it, by anyone functioning normally as a human being—as negative feedback. They mask it with this new-agey shit like, "this is a gift for you to take to the future." Like we should be very glad that now we know our makeup looks like shit or that our shoes are fug, so that we can correct the situation and do a better job. Oh, also, Sephora is what we call a "values-based" company, which to my understanding means that we are not allowed to even say words like steal, shoplift, took, take, thief, what have you. Instead of loss prevention, we have "excellent client servicing." This means that we follow clients around, talking to them, helping them, basically watching them like hawks under the guise of customer service to ensure that the bad thing we're not supposed to say does not happen. So there isn't a security guard, no tags, nothing like that. Instead it's us, and I mean... our costumes don't have pockets for a reason, too. But yeah, we don't use negative terms at Sephora and "gift" is another example of that.

How quickly does stock move at your store? Do any of the items sit around on the shelves for a long time?

People are not feeling the Decleor skincare line. They don't buy the Bliss home waxing kit ever, either. We sell a lot of Perricone, but people seem to be kind of confused about the other cosmeceuticals unless I am here to enable them. Those are my favorite things to sell, but the names have gotten so technical for some of these products that people literally do not understand that oh, this is face cream. The department store brands don't sell... Clinique, Lancome, Shiseido, all of those. People can get those in other places so they tend not to care so much about them. Sometimes someone will come in and request a certain Lancome product or something, but for the most part, people are interested in the fun, new stuff. These products all have preservatives enough so that we can keep them on the shelf for years if they don't sell. Also, I'm not there all the time so it's hard for me to know exactly how much is moving in terms of a gross net. This isn't the kind of thing staff members are routinely consulted about, we're just told how much the store made and how much we are expected to sell for the day.

What's up with your fearless Leader, Cunty Claus? Did she do anything cunty this week?

She does some kind of cunty something every week, pretty much. This week I was at the store on a Sunday before it opened, and I mean, cast members use the front door just like everyone else so if that's locked, you're shit out of luck until someone opens it for you. So we're waiting outside in the cold, and by the time anyone remembered to open the door for us, we were all a grand total of three minutes late. I was the last one to clock in, and I was only three minutes late. Anyway, Cunty Claus took this opportunity to give all of us this terrible lecture at Touch Base, which is our opening meeting, and it's all about how she doesn't understand why we didn't call the store if we were going to be late, what are our excuses, we're late all the time, just a bunch of bullshit like that. I explained to her that we were only three minutes late according to the time clock and she launches into this whole big thing about how the time clock and the clock on the stage are different or something bullshitty. Basically she was just pissed we didn't hop to it in a big hurry freaking out over our jobs even though it wasn't even our faults in the first place that no one opened the doors sooner. She's on this extremely creepy power trip. Once she found me leaning against a display for what, a second, and she says, "We don't lean here. We stand at Sephora." What the fuck? Who says that? She's really into intimidating the cast members so that she seems more authoritative. I think she lives in a world where she has no power and any time she's not at Sephora, working, people like take their dicks out and wipe them on her face. But I guess Sephora is the place where she can avoid the Dirty Sanchez and so we're all three minutes late on Cunty Claus' beat.

How did you finally get rid of your acne?

Oh, that is a long story I will save for next time. But I literally know everything about anything having to do with your skin, so bring on the skin care queries. I am fired up and ready to fight your glands with you.

• The facts speak for themselves: Heidi Klum is designing a capsule collection for Jordache, for which she has been modeling over the past year. Think she'll offer hair extensions to cover nipples as well? [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Kathy Hilton just released her own perfume. It's called "My Secret." We don't really want to think about what Kathy Hilton's secret might smell like. [BellaSugar]
  
• Gloria Steinem would not approve: Georgina Chapman, Marchesa designer and wife of Halston co-owner Harvey Weinstein, was named "Georgina Weinstein" on her front row seat at Halston yesterday. Only, as Chapman herself put it, "I didn't change my name, they did it for me." [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Jimmy Choo's CEO Tamara Mellon thinks that boyfriend Christian Slater should take a more active, or acting, role in fashion. Mellon says Slater would be "perfect" to play Halston in any upcoming biopic on the designer. [WWD, 1st item]

• One last Halston item! Rachel Zoe, who sits on the label's creative advisory team, wasn't at yesterday's debut show. A rep for the label was quick to issue a statement that Zoe has not been fired. Um, the lady doth protest too much? [WWD, 2nd item]
• Does the fashion industry hate the Bush Administration? Laura Bush is having a luncheon next week for all the designers who participated in this year's The Heart Truth's Red Dress Collection but Nicole Miler, Donna Karan, Carmen Marc Valvo, Tracy Reese, and Marchesa designers Georgina Chapman and Keren Craig have all said that they won't be able to attend. [WWD, 3rd item]
• Is anyone else depressed that Naomi Campbell and Andre Leon Talley collaborated to star and style in a SoBe "Thrillicious" commercial? [Fashion Week Daily]
• Burberry faux-fur parkas actually use dog fur. Fun! [UPI]
• Charges have been dropped against the manager of the Abercrombie & Fitch store in Virginia Beach, who was scapegoated by a cop whose delicate sensibilities were offended by A&F ads. [MSNBC]
• The latest item up for sale under Bono's (Product) RED line: The Mulberry Roxanne bag, done in sweatshirt material (red, naturally), for the Gap. [Sassybella]
• Count Fergie in as the latest face of MAC Viva Glam lipstick. [WWD, 2nd item]
• Brittany Murphy on Mr. and Mrs. Max Azria: "They're a very nice family, with great morals, very grounded. Plus, they'll even invite you over for Shabbat dinner. Who would turn that down?" [WWD, 4th item]
• Model Caroline Trentini has declared that she will be donating a percentage of her earnings from New York fashion shows to the Center of Support of Underprivileged Children with Cancer in her native Brazil. [WWD, 5th item]
• Is model/First Lady of France Carla Bruni pregnant with a son? [Vogue UK]
• Just what the world needed: Chocolate Armani Easter eggs. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Avon profits have dropped by 30%. There is no time for beauty in a recession. [Breitbart]

• Tory Burch is designing a line inspired by old pictures of Martha Stewart, back from when Martha Stewart looked sort of like a pretty version of Tory Burch. [As I'm sure you can imagine, Jennie, who loves both WASPs and fashion-pop culture collabos like the proverbial fat kid loves cake, is in a corner somewhere heaving in ecstasy. Hey Jennie, Ralph Lauren called, and he's got a message for you! "I Am Your Father." -Moe] [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Ever wondered how Miuccia Prada transported herself from office to car in those heels? A giant slide. Sort of what you'd expect, but whoa. [Sassybella]
  
• Vivienne Westwood, Luella Bartley and others are designing dresses inspired by the Disney princesses as part of the celebration of Euro Disney's 15th anniversary. The dresses will be auctioned off with proceeds going to UNICEF, which is the part you should focus on, as opposed to whatever the fuck the guy who drops a few hundred grand on a Westwood-designed Ariel gown will actually be doing with it. [FemaleFirst]

• J. Mendel designer Gilles Mendel has a band called Born Again Baldwins. Um, quirky? [WWD, 2nd item]
• We love Julianne Moore. Which is why we're not exactly thrilled to bring you the news that Vogue sponsored the reading she held for her children's book Freckleface Ball yesterday, at the Hogan store. [WWD, 3rd item]
• M.A.C. raised $100 million in funds for the M.A.C. AIDS Foundation! Wait, you mean to tell us fashion does actually give back? [Fashion Week Daily]
• What has Elizabeth Hurley been up to? "I'm still working on my bikini line, but I've also started to work on my organic farming." Of course she has. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Don't you just hate when the claim that your overpriced line of yoga wear is made from seaweed turns out not to be true? [NYT]
• Tiffany's is after eBay, saying it is not doing anything to crack down on sellers of counterfeit Tiffany's baubles. [WSJ]
• Burberry profits are up 31%. They credit "accessories" which is investor relations speak for "accessibly priced crap that comes in that signature plaid, duh." [FT]
• Says fashion designer/sister of fashion photographer Mario Testino of the strong creative genes in their family: "I have a brother in Paris who works with Mario, a sister in New York who is an interior designer, another sister in Peru who designs jewellery but also works with Mario - in fact we all do a bit - we're his slaves!" Um, nevermind. Not strong genes. Strong chains. [Vogue UK]
• Prada. Limited edition. Keychains. Design taken from Prada archives from the '30's. Also, teddy bears. [Vogue UK]

• All that time spent workin' on her fitness pays yet another dividend: Fergie is the latest MAC Viva Glam spokesperson. [WWD, 1st item]
  
• If you live in New York and have nothing better to do this weekend — and trust us, you don't — might we suggest that you pop by the Marc Jacobs men's store in the West Village? The sales boys there will be selling in the nude. [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• Cate Blanchett used to only think super-expensive skincare brand SK-II was good for Australians and Kiwis, but apparently she changed her mind and decided citizens of Spain, the U.K., Canada and U.S. America could benefit from it too, and as a result we will be seeing her face even more and some money changed hands and that's why we subscribe to WWD so you don't have to, guys. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Heidi Klum sings [Gossip Girls via Sassybella]
  
• Designer Yves Saint Laurent's country estate in Normandy: yours for a marked-down $17.8 million. [WSJ]

• Barney's creative director Simon Doonan on Iman: "She's a laugh, so dry and hilarious. She should have her own television show. If they're all like her in Somalia, I am going there on my next vacation." Um. [WWD, 3rd item]
• Lanvin's Alber Elbaz on being current in design: "I'm afraid of the word of the moment because its like being Miss America; there is nothing worse than being Miss America 2005 in 2006." [Fashion Week Daily]
• Coach is valiantly fighting the evil blogforces who insist they aren't a "real" luxury brand by opening up a new chain of what it is terming "legacy" stores, which for your purposes would probably be better described as "who the fuck needs a $20,000 alligator skin bag?" stores. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Ouch! Where does Vogue UK get off with telling us we're short?! [Vogue UK]
• Yay for jewelry that doesn't involve mutilating elephants! [WWD, sub req'd]

• Yup, we're still bitter about not being at London Fashion Week. The Stella McCartney for Adidas show was held at an amusement park at which the models and guests frolicked, playing mini-golf and eating hot dogs. [Vogue UK]
  
• OMG. David Beckham is rumored to be designing the costumes for the Spice Girl Tour. OMG. [Vogue UK]
  
• Snaps to ELLE.com for recognizing that the fashion industry is just like high school. And even bestowing the superlatives to go along with it. And it's even almost bitchy! Just like high school should be! [Elle.com]
  
• At age 80 Eartha Kitt is the face of the new MAC line "Smoke Signals." And at age 80 she has better legs than we ever will too. Purrrrrrfect. [WWD, sub req'd]

• Louis Vuitton is showcasing the works of Moscow artists in its Paris store. Just like Sherri Shepherd (and Tom Friedman) told us, the world is flat. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Paul Smith introduces his first women's fragrance, Paul Smith Rose, which is inspired by the, uh, Sir Paul Smith Rose that his wife had named for him. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Aretha Franklin does PR speak about Sean "Diddy" Combs new fragrance "Unforgivable for Women": "I like [Unforgivable for Women] because it's sexy and refreshing and has a lot of really good elements to it." [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Meanwhile Combs has posted the video advertisement for Unforgivable for Women that was banned from TV on his MySpace page "I feel strongly that this movie needs to be viewed and judged by the public and not executives." Dude - it's an ad for perfume not Do The Right Thing. [Vogue UK]
  
• Want your own Versace-and-Liz-Hurley-esque black safety pin dress? London department store Harrods now says it will whip you up a custom version. For about $22,000 that is. [Sassybella]
  
• Virtual Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen dolls. For reals. [Fashion Week Daily]

• Oh great: Valentino finally breaks down and retires, and now we have to deal with the lady-doth-protest-too-muches of Giorgio Armani who, out of the blue, has made a big announcement that he is not retiring. Now we give him one year, tops. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Best. Fashion Week quote. EVER: "She don't want nothing to do with this!," security guard at Miss Sixty show, regarding Demi Moore and Hilary Swank, to aggressive photographers. Yes. [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Donatella Versace is one hard-working bitch: Our favorite bleached-blonde, tanorexic cokehead Italian says she left the hospital immediately after delivering one of her two children (via Cesarean) to complete the designs on the Versace men's line. All we can think about is 1) the painkillers and 2) the hygiene? [NY Post]
  
• The kids? Still buying denim. And lots of it. [MediaPost]

• Alexander McQueen is teaming up with MAC to create a makeup line inspired by his Spring 2008 collection's makeup. Which was done by MAC. And which was apparently inspired by images of Cleopatra. So we're thinking they don't have to actually make anything new if they've already done this? Head. Hurting. Now. [Vogue UK]
• Ew: Why would accessories designer Lulu Guinness want Arden Wohl to be modeling her bags? [Vogue UK]
• A reality show about Elie and Rory Tahari??? But why??? [Fashion Week Daily]