Jezebel: Louboutins

Every Time A Louboutin Is Sold, Victoria Beckham Gets Her Wings

Dodai — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 11:10:00 EDT

[Manchester, August 29. Image via Splash.]

Oprah Wears Louboutins To Interview Anti-Consumerist "Freegans"

Slut Machine — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 18:00:00 EST

On yesterday's Oprah, Lisa Ling investigated the world of "freegans," people who live alternative lifestyles in order to limit their use of resources and their participation in the economy. Oprah sat with Madeline, a woman who earns a six-figure salary, but hasn't bought clothing in three years, and does her grocery shopping via organized trips of dumpster diving. The tactics of freegans can be a little outrageous, but so was the fact that Oprah was interviewing this anti-consumerist in a pair of Louboutin heels that look like they've never touched pavement. Clip above.

Louboutins? Marc Jacobs Jellies? Nah. It's All About Crocs!

Jennifer — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 12:25:16 EDT

OMG!!! Crocs, maker of comfy-anti-chic (yay for rebel style! fight the man!) clog-sandal hybrids (a clandal? a slog?) is expanding its brand and launching a full-out line of Crocs-branded footwear. With price-points ranging from $149 to $299 you've got to admire the way that Crocs wants consumers to drain their wallets in the name of slacker style. The top 5 reasons why we can't wait for the next in rubber shoes, after the jump.

1. Sienna Miller for Tod's? Scarlett for Louis Vuitton? Child's play. We want to see big man on the restaurant campus and noted Crocs-wearer Mario Batali starring in the ad campaign. We're envisioning a Mario Testino (Mario + Mario!) photo shoot in which a scantily-clad Batali stirs up some real fires in the kitchen wearing the new Crocs fashions. Yes, we realize the line is for women. But Batali in drag? We'd buy anything with that image behind it.

2. As we discussed yesterday, you could wear rubber on your feet in an 80's throwback kind of way. But why pay homage to a style from decades past when you could we wearing less-fashionable clonkers on your feet in brand new styles? Poor judgment regarding inadequately-ventilated footwear is always in style, clearly!

3. We love high-low style! (Paging John Edwards during Sunday night's debate!!!) That's why we think the fact that the new shoes will be mixing rubber with leather, suede, and lambswool is sure to yield one classy shoe. Who wouldn't want to wear the bastard lovechild of Uggs and a rubber plant?

4. Puke green, rotting papaya orange, dirty snow grey: If these aren't the hottest colors to put on your feet, we don't know what is!

5. Last time we checked, the whole point of Crocs is that wearing them is a choice of comfort over style. Which like we totally dig, ok? So the fact that the new line has 8 of 9 designs on a steep wedge heel — well, doesn't that imply style over comfort? And why choose, say, Yves Saint Laurent wooden platforms when you could be achieving the same pain quotient in an overpriced everyman shoe? Stylish pain? That's just masochistic. But ugly pain? Now that's a look everyone can love!

Crocs Unveils Fashion Line To Broaden Customer Base [WSJ]

Fatal Epidemic Breaks Out In UK: Paralysis-Yielding Jeans To Blame

Jennifer — Mon, 04 Jun 2007 16:30:05 EDT

Pity the Englishwoman with DFS: Debilitating Fashion Syndrome. Hitting England harder than the Bubonic plague — and with even more grotesque results! — DFS-afflicted women find themselves unable to eat, bend, walk, or sit, all because of their fashion choices. Case studies of these self-mutilating fashion fiends, after the jump.

The High-Waisted Denim Abuser:

'I can't do anything normal in these jeans. I can't bend. And you can forget food - it's liquids every two hours, and not too much, at that. They have taken over my life. I can't even wash up.'

The Louboutin Addict:

'They're so high that I've become banister-reliant. My days of walking down the middle of the stairs are over - there has to be a banister, or I can't move.'

The Chanel Whore:

One all-powerful editrix-in-chief recently joined a gym and went once, never to return...[She] couldn't understand why her personal trainer wasn't keen to let her on the treadmill in her Chanel platform sneakers with diamanté double Cs and dinky bows.

The Delusional Hobbler:

[She has such an] extreme wardrobe that it requires an entourage: one helper to carry the three designer handbags she routinely totes, and another to cling on to for support when she totters around in impossible heels. 'She threads her arm through mine, and we're off. Well, she hobbles and I drag her,' says her appointed walker.

So if you see a woman looking fearful when faced with a scary staircase or stranded in a crosswalk, abandoned by her dragger and unable to lift her well-heeled footsies, do your part and help the poor sicko out. Or just laugh and keep walking. That works too!

I Don't Do Walking... [Times of London]