And here's the live stream:

10:55 That was it!?

10:44 Ugh. The male secretary gets his own secretary?

10:42 God, Pete is such a weenie.

10:35 I wonder if gay sex was hotter in the '60s because it was so forbidden, adding to the excitement level.

10:34 Scratch that. GAY SEX!

10:24 Am I the only one who is disappointed by this episode so far? It's really oddly paced and not getting to any of the shit that interests me (Peggy, Joan, Betty, etc.).

10:21 I was wondering how long it was gonna take before they had a party-girl stewardess storyline.

10:20 Hey smokers: Does this show make you wanna light up more than normal?

10:18 OMG, that lady's hair hat at Pete's house! She looks like Phyllis Diller after a few drinks.

10:12 Silver fox!

10:10 I like that the women on the show re-wear their outfits, like Peggy and her plaid ruffles.

10:08 Lesbian!

10:05 Has anyone ever drank warm milk? I've never known anyone to.

Press "watch now" to see the liveblog!

For those who need a little background, here's a list of the nominees.

10:50 UM....WHAT? There should be 10 minutes left!

10:35 My prediction: Duck will be president and then fuck it all up by getting drunk.

10:20 Wow, OK, so is Betty actually gonna become a modern woman by getting an abortion and getting divorced?

10:17 I think this is shaping up to be that Betty is gonna take Don back because she's afraid of Cuban missiles. I'm drunk.

10:16 Colin Hanks looks like he's cream-filled.

10:08 Hmm...I think I like Duck WAY better as a drunk.

10:01 Betty's pregs! I thought they showed that period scene in the last episode just to demonstrate why Betty was being such a bitch to her neighbor earlier on, you know, because she had PMS.

10:00 This was my fiancé's idea:

10:00 ET: That's it! If you've got something to say, email "them" or stick around in the comments.

9:59 ET: She goes out on footage of the White House T-ball game and how Bush made all the Joint Chiefs participate. Kent says, "It might have been less humiliating if he let them pitch!" Bonus rogering reference about Bush and the Joint Chiefs right after Rachel mentions that Bush took neocon think tank advice over theirs per Woodward's book? Kent redeems himself. He can be the most annoying bastard, but if he can work in the buttsecks references under the radar, he's my boy.

9:58 ET: Lance Armstrong might come out of retirement in 2009. Kent is a little annoying.

9:57 ET: "Just Enough" with Kent Jone on pop culture? Ok, whatevs. MTV Video Music Awards: Rihanna, P!nk, Jonas Brothers, and then Britney Speaks won three awards including video of the year? Man, the things you miss.

9:54 ET: "It's a little unfair to accuse me of trashing her religion and then trash [Jeremiah Wright], Pat. But it was a pleasure to have you." She needs to have a fucking hook for him. Or a slave hood she could zip shut like The Gimp from Pulp Fiction.

9:54 ET: "I would love to ask her that, but I'm afraid the campaign would think me not appropriately deferential." ZING.

9:52 ET: It's also unfair to criticize her church, according to Pat. She's a Pentacostal, by the way, not an evangelical. He accuses Rachel of "trashing" that religion.

9:51 ET: "It was the scruvy lies and slanders on the DailyKos... They didn't do this to John Edwards." Rachel points out that all blogs did cover it while the MSM didn't, and the MSM wouldn't if Palin hadn't put the statement out.

9:50 ET: It's Pat! His combover is way less obvious on TV than in person. Also, he's pissed that the Washington Post put Bristol Palin's pregnancy above the fold... and that's, like, totally unobjective of the,

9:48 ET: Keeping Sarah away from the media. Rick Davis calls coverage of her "unobjective." On Fox News. No irony.

9:48 ET: FedEx lemming commercial! Love this commercial!

9:47 ET: Alli commercial! I like my fat ass, thanks. Sometimes. I like it better than shitting weird, anyway.

9:44 ET: "We are Day 9 into Sarah Palin's Media Avoidance Tour." Also, she calls Pat Buchanan her fake uncle and shows Michelle Obama dancing and Michelle looks fucking awesome dancing and is better than Barack. Michelle and I need to go dancing. Michelle, call me!

9:43 ET: She says Obama's message is that, "Did you like the last 8 years? Great, go vote for John McCain??" Umm, the fuck? Yeah, not so much.

9:41 ET: Rosa doesn't have a good answer: we're really divided, national polls don't matter, polls don't capture new voters, Sarah Palin's too divisive and Obama has more of a can-do attitude than Palin. Yeah, seriously, remain not impressed with Rosa. And not because I'm a whiny, trying-to-lose hang-wringer.

9:40 ET: Rachel asks a good question: if Obama's so totally going to win, why are they tied.

9:39 ET: LA Times columnist Rosa Brooks. "Democrats seize every opportunity to wring their hands." I already find her a little annoying.

9:38 ET: Ooh, they just show Barack being sarcastic: "With the exception of [every policy issue under the sun, John McCain] is totally going to shake things up in Washington."

9:35 ET: Back to Olbermann's Obama interview! Obama likes the John McSame meme. Rachel doesn't seem to be buying that he is better off sticking to his current tactics.

9:32 ET: Congress won't take up SCHIP again despite the fact that Republicans don't want to have to vote against it before an election because they're scared of the veto pen. Wahhhh.

9:30 ET: Federal government took over Fannie Mae and Federal Mac. McCain twice was all about not bailing them out: now, naturally, he's all for it. Palin said today that they've become too big and expensive for taxpayers... only they weren't until the federal government took them over.

9:29 ET: Underreported stories! Yay! First up: the GSA wants the government to repeal post 9/11 safety codes because developers won't make enough money if they have to put up glow tape in stairwells. Man, when will the Bushies be evac'd from D.C. again?

9:26 ET: eHarmony commercial. They don't allow Teh Gayz to participate, but apparently enough lonely straights watch Rachel anyway. Then AT&T and Crestor for the Oldz.

9:26 ET: Awww, Rachel hits on one of my bugaboos — Congress should fucking pass some legislation Bush has threatened to veto. Fuck his veto! Fuck it!

9:25 ET: McCain is now saying they won't let Palin give an interview until they're sure the media would be "appropriately deferential." The media is supposed to be deferential? Where the fuck did that get this country after 9/11?

9:24 ET: He's never endorsed a candidate since he's been a pastor? Is that even allowed anymore?

9:22 ET: Rachel wants to know if its appropriate to ask Palin about why she sat in church and listened to that crap, and T.D. says we should ask her if she believes it but it isn't fair to judge her for not being rude to a guest speaker. Man, he's so even-tempered. I guess Rachel's leaving the fire-breathing for Olbermann. I'm kind of cool with that.

9:21 ET: He says politicians prolly shouldn't speak for God as it related to war. Amen.

9:20 ET: Bishop T.D. Jakes is here!

9:19 ET: Jews for Jesus founder preached of her church, and God uses terrorism to express His displeasure with Jews. Can we officially say Jews for Jesus people are as creepy as Scientologists.

9:18 ET: God has a plan for Iraq (according to Sarah Palin? Hmmmm, could that be... Barack Obama?

9:16 ET: Cialis commercial. I guess it's not just women that think Rachel Maddow is fucking hot.

9:15 ET: Sarah Palin's pastor thinks that Alaska will be a refuge during the apocalypse... Man, evangelicals make Catholic orthodoxy look completely rational.

9:14 ET: Pro-drilling commercial? WTF?

9:13 ET: "Unlike chocolate and peanut butter, church and state are not two great tastes that go great together," says Rachel.

9:12 ET: Rick Davis said that this campaign isn't about the issues? WTF?

9:11 ET: "If anyone is the ideological heir to George W. Bush, it's Sarah Palin." No, Rachel didn't say it, but it was a great line.

9:06 ET: Breaking down how Sarah P

10:17am: I am stuck in traffic behind a broken down bus! This cabbie is an asshole. I might have to get out and run. [Ed note: The movie is supposed to start at 10:15]

10:37: Two cabs and one subway trip later. I'm finally here! It took me an hour to travel maybe three miles. I already hate this movie.

10:40: These are the shoes I chose to wear. Thank friggin god I didn't wear heels as a joke.

10:41: Big just proposed to Carrie. Kinda.
10:45: This theater is packed and everyone is laughing at the stupid jokes. Although Samantha told Carrie she should get Botox.

10:48: Carrie still has that stupid pink crystal-y phone. Except it's taped together which is a nice touch. She just asked Samantha to be her maid of honor.

10:49: All Charlotte does is scream.

10:50: LOL! Carrie's boss talked her into doing the bride at 40 piece by saying "Vogue airbrushing".

10:52: The wedding photo shoot scene. The Dior dress looks like frothy diarrhea. Vivienne Westwood personally sent Carrie a dress for free.

10:55: Haha. Carrie is becoming far-sighted but won't get glasses. Also Chris Noth: Fake tan much?
10:56: Carrie does research for her new book (about love) at the library.

10:59: Carrie won't tell her friends how often she and Big fuck!

11:02: Also, she calls him "John" now.

11:03: OMG, Big built Carrie a closet just like Mariah Carey's. It looks like a store.

11:04: Charlotte just screamed again. And again.

11:05: I'm cringing. They are trying on outfits to "Walk This Way".

11:07: The Miranda/Steve storyline is actually really good. He just admitted to cheating on her and the old lady in the wheelchair behind me just yelled "Hit him! Hit him!" I'm gonna try to get a picture of her.

11:14: Miranda is like a total bitch.

11:24: Big just jilted her! Because she wouldn't answer the phone in the morning. Seriously, all these people are such babies! who wants to put up with this bullshit? Now Charlotte is screaming at Big. Kristin Davis' throat must've been so sore.

11:28: "Okay so he didn't really jilt her. He freaked for a second, then turned around and went back but Carrie was already embarrassed and then she hit him. The whole thing could've been avoided. Kind of like this movie!

11:31: The reason why the honeymoon was in Mexico is because Carrie paid for it as a surprise.

11:32: Carrie is now in a deep depression in Mexico She's been sleeping and not eating. Speaking of, I'm gonna step out to the concession stand for some breakfast.

11:34: Hahahaha! They actually showed Miranda's thick bush.

11:43: Breakfast!

11:44: Somehow Carrie got her apartment back. I missed that when I was buying my breakfast.

11:47: I guess I also missed the part about how Carrie can afford Jennifer Hudson.

11:50: It really pisses me off that Carrie isn't computer literate. Her assistant does her email for her while she flips through magazines on her couch.

11:55: Carrie died her hair dark brown and changed her phone number and is complaining about having a different area code. [The Lifestyles Of The Rich And First World! -Ed.]

11:57: Samantha adopted a dog because its a girl who loves to hump and she felt a connection.

11:58: Jennifer Hudson deserves a Razzie for this. She sucks.

12:00 Oh! I forgot to mention that Charlotte shit her pants in Mexico. Literally.

12:02: Carrie bought her assistant a Louis Vuitton bag for Christmas. Carrie is a retard.

12:08: Okay, finally a Carrie outfit I like. Pajamas, boots, fur coat, stupid hat. That's what I call "walking the dog" attire.

12:10: This sad people on New Year's Eve montage is way too long.

12:16: Carrie finally realized that she is a self-obsessed narcissist! And that she uses "I" too much.

12:29: One therapy session and Miranda and Steve are back together. Also, Miranda is the only one to show her tits.

12:32: Samantha has gained like 5 lbs and everyone noticed. What bitches.

12:33: Samantha and Smith just had the most civilized breakup after 5 years.

12:35: I just checked carriebradshaw.com and she wrote a book called MENhattan? Barf.
12:37: Also, Charlotte's little girls are named Lily and Rose. Barf x2.
12:41: Interesting. Carrie always wears a bra to bed, but in this frantic city scene she is running through the streets without one.
12:46: People are actually crying in this theater because Big proposed a second time with a Manolo!

12:51: Last line: "And there they were, four friends who had met as girls and were now women ready to enter the next phase of their lives, dressed head to toe in love. And that's one label that never goes out of style." LOL.

This is the violent wheelchair lady.

This is the next showing lining up. So many mothers and daughters.

Yeah, I'm sure they share their sexual liberation together.

12:59: As I was walking out of the theater a middle aged woman working there asked me if the movie was any good and I made the "so-so" sign with my hand and then she goes, "Yeah, I figured. I never liked that show. I'm a Will & Grace fan myself."

8:58 I'm glad that Paulina redeemed herself by saying "This isn't 'plus size.' This is beautiful."

8:57 HOLY FUCKING SHIT ALSDKFJSADL;FKJSADLF;KASDJNFLKSADHSAKL;FJADLKF;J. YAAAAAAAY for plus size girls!

8:56 Here it comes! I'm actually torn right now. I feel like Tyra, when she says, "I woke up this morning and I knew who I was voting for tonight. But now I'm up in the air."

8:53 I'm a little offended by Paulina calling Whitney a "ham." I don't like the pork connotation.

8:47 I love when Tyra gives a compliment and couches it in "You remind me of me."

8:46 Everyone got a costume change except Whitney?

8:44 Jeez, Whitney's dress is making me nervous.

8:42 Boy models? Also, where's Orangella already!?

8:41 Oh, this is a new weave for Tyra!

8:35 Where's Orangella already!?

8:30 WHITNEY! Dude, a plus size girl could take this. Also, Whitney is like totally thinner than me. Does that make me family size?

8:27 Whitney's picture is pretty, but I think she looks stupid in it the way that Paulina thinks Anya looks stoopid.

8:23 Holy friggin' shit! Versace! They're actually going to be wearing a real designer's clothes in a runway show tonight? But more importantly: We're totally gonna get some Donatella action!

8:21 Tyra just said to Fatima, "You have to do that eye squint. You have to smile with your eyes, and squint them and make them smaller, but keep them open, because your eyes are already small." What the hell kind of advice is that?

8:18 OK, again, not to be a bish, but I think that Fatima is vastly overestimating her relatability. I, for one, can not relate growing up "in a shack," being a virgin, having female circumcision, being as thin as a rail, and not having "travels" documents.

8:17 Why can't anyone pronounce arrivederci?

8:14 Hey, i never noticed that Jay Manuel wears a gold band on his ring finger. Does he have a life partner? Haha! "Life partner" is such a gay term, and I don't mean gay in a homosexual way.

8:10 Now that Anya is crying, and her eyelids are red, she looks super albino.

8:07 Billboard in Times Square! Oh, here comes Tootie.

8:06 Anya, don't chop your finger off!

8:05 Not to be a bish, but Fatima needs to work on her skin. I mean, this is a modeling competition.

10:30 It's taking forever for this shit to load: http://www.ambrelake.com/

10:28 So how long do you think this fake relationship with Ambre will last? I bet they aren't even together at the reunion next week. Fuck, they better not be. I want a third season!

10:26 Desperation and fear is not a good look on Ambre. her whole face is sweaty and shaking.

10:21 The fact that Bret constantly refers to "rock of love" as though it's an actual phrase that people use never ceases to entertain me.

10:19 Has anyone else seen The Ruins? (Great movie, btw.) Bret looks like he just walked out of the tomb where the poison plant lives. Wait...poison! Ha!

10:12 In these reflective shots on the beach, Bret looks like my school bus driver from when I was in grade school. She was a woman. Sort of.

10:10 It's weird when Bret and everyone talk about his "lifestyle." What kind of crazy lifestyle could he possibly have, considering his diabeedus?

10:00 I saw an ad for Maid of Honor on the side of a bus a few weeks ago, and I joked that it was probably the same plot as My Best Friend's Wedding but with gender reversal. Turns out it is! Also, so that's what Dwayne Wayne's been up to. Huh!

9:55 Ha! I really hope the girls realize that Bret has given them the same necklace.

9:52 Kudos to Bret for kissing Daisy after she puked. Although something about him leads me to believe that he doesn't do the same after a girl gives him a BJ.

9:46 Seriously, how many girls have puked while on a date with Bret?

9:41 It's kinda telling that Daisy isn't really good at the whole mean girl thing. She's too nice or something.

9:40 Side not: Ew! Did you see Hal Sparks in that magician commercial? Why is he doing that with his hair?

9:35 WHOA! Ambre is showing Bret her vagina! When do you think he'll show her his?

9:34 Does Ambre seriously think that Bret picked that charm necklace out for her himself? Or that it wasn't provided for free by a sponsor.

9:32 I don't understand why Ambre keeps saying that Daisy is being ugly. Wasn't Daisy just confronting Ambre for belittling her in front of Bret.

9:29 I truly wonder what Daisy was doing all day while Ambre was on her date with Bret. My best guess is trying on outfits.

9:21 Thanks AndYourLittleDogToo. I was totally spelling Ambre's name wrong. Well, actually, I was spelling it correctly. She's the one that's spelling it wrong.

9:17 Hahahaha. I love how Ambre is saying that she feels so sexy, meanwhile she has last night's eyeliner on, her legs are cut up, and her rosacea is showing around her mouth.

9:10 I'm not into Ambre. I don't like how she tries to cut Daisy down. Also, she's such a fake-y actress wannabe. But at the same time, this is a fake-y dating show, so I guess that's fitting.

9:04 Bret seems to love bringing the girls to real spring break type places, like Cancun and Cabo. It's wonderfully inappropriate because he and Ambre could have children old enough to be on spring break, and I'm fairly certain that Daisy hasn't gone to college.

9:00 Oh, and I totally forgot that Ambre wasn't even supposed to stay after the first episode. That Jersey-type brunette left and Ambre got to stay in her place.

8:20: Waiting outside - Kit and Jeffrey are here together and chatting. Kit looks much older in person. Jeffrey is smoking cloves and has grown his hair out.

8:25: Just asked Jeffrey who he likes from the current season; he says Sweet P is his favorite: "Sweet P and Hillary in 08 all the way."

8:35: We're in a holding area now; they've taken the photographers in and I'm just sitting in a press line. Of course, everyone in the press line is not dressed up at all; we're all wearing jeans.

8:45: I think I see the woman wrestler that Chris March costumed; she's wearing a leopard print coat. Of course.

8:55: Jay McCarroll and Uncle Nick arriving together; They are being escorted in by security. I only saw Jay for a minute, but his hair is short except for the front, which is in a pseudo-pompadour and it's all dyed black. Except for the poof, which is white. Uncle Nick is wearing a tailored blue suit.

9:00: Ugh we have been standing in the passageway between the main foyer and then tent for a while now; I am growing faint. But I've befriended some gays.

9:05: Security just made an announcement that everyone needs to throw out their coffee before entering.

9:07: Ooh, Laura Bennett; Bad Mommy. Gonna go talk to her.

9:09: Laura says she's gonna be on QVC on Feb .24, selling 7 garments [Shameless plug! -Ed.] Chloe gonna be on too. Also she can't wait to see Jillan and Chris March and thinks Christian will win.

9:10: She thinks this season was boring; no drama. However, in regards to drama, she says she is scared of the Jezebel commenters; she calls the Jezebel readers "salty New England dogs." She says she wants to respond to the commenters who railed at her for calling her nannies "the girls", explaining that, in the South, you're either a "girl" or an "old bag". And she says she can't believe someone commented about her letting her kids run around at the airport: "Wouldn't you rather them run around at the airport than on the plane?"

9:15: More Laura: She thinks Christian will win. But she'll be a little disappointed if he does. She says she agreed with the Project Rungay guys that he's "princess puffy sleeves" and that she wants to slap him across the face every week and that she screams at her tv telling him he needs to behave.

9:18: Ooh, I'm gonna try to grab Tyson Beckford.

9:20: Tyson wants Christian to win. Or, as he called him, "That guy with the funny hair and glasses."

9:25: Okay, they told everyone to take their seats - time to start, they say. I just had to throw some bitch out of my seat and have her unhand my swag bag. Inside the bag: The new issue of Elle, some Tresemme curl spray, a Hershey bar, Tresemme hair spray, L'Oreal lip gloss, a key ring. Person behind me just said of new Elle, "I love Amy Adams but ugh that is the worst picture of her."

9:33: Oooh, lights dimming. Stragglers are being told by security to take seats NOW.
There is minor hollering. Where oh where is Tim Gunn?

9:38: Padma just took her seat. She is so fucking hot. Ted Allen and Gail Simmons sitting beside her. Seats next to the judges are saved for Niki Taylor and Mary Louise Parker. Ooh, Nina and Michael are in the house! Michael's wearing his shades; Nina has bangs.

9:39: Victoria motherfucking Beckham is here!!!!!!!! She just entered down runway with Heidi; wearing an almost neon orange dress.

9:40: Posh is the motherfucking guest judge!!!! Everyone is waving and cheering for her. Heidi's wearing jeans; I wonder if they're Jordache? Okay, it's starting!

9:45: Heidi made her entrance: "Hello everybody!" (Clapping) She says lots of super-fast beating hearts backstage. Now she's introducing the judges. And she also made big point of telling everyone that Harvey Weinstein here too.

9:47: I wonder if I would look hot or dumb in Heidi's haircut.

9:49: Okay Sweet P has entered; she says she hopes we love her collection as much as she does. She is crying.

9:50: First look: it's like a metallic-y suitish thing? Gold shirt. Purple metallic flecked top with bustle and pencil skirt. Second look: tube dress in the purple material; so much more sophisticated than anything she ever did on the show. Now a crazy stripe skinny suit with ruffle shirt. Now a skirt suit in stripe print with ruffle bell sleeves, and ruffles down the back. An olive green felt cape over bronze tiered ruffle halter dress. Tartan tube dress with exaggerated hips. Tartan high-waisted trousers, with a striped peasant blouse. Ooh pretty tailored purple coat, with navy detailing. Maybe it's supposed to be a dress? Fits like a glove. Blue silk dress with sheer black top and back. Gold dress with exaggerated hips.

9:55: Black and gold deco looking dress, above knee, very cool. How did sweet p make this??? Black velvet exaggerated jodphurs with white silk sleeveless top with velvet bow and felt big hat. That was the closing look. I was strangely impressed! Sweet P is crying while taking her bow.

9:57: Now it's...Chris March. And crowd goes WILD. He is crying. I am starting to tear up too! "Go Chris" the crowd is shouting; the whole place is clearly pulling for him. He says "I never knew that living my life one day at a time for many days would lead me to this hour, this moment."

10:00: First look: blue silk screened dress with a Botticelli face on it; applause from crowd. And a black model wearing it! Second look is a suit. Oh lord there is pony hair fringe. Blue velvet skirt and tapestry jacket. Next is long jacket in the tapestry, also with the pony hair. Now a red Grecian gown, also silk screened. Now a suit in velvet: red velvet jacket, black velvet pencil skirt. Next is a rather awful red velvet dress: short, spaghetti straps, lots of applique. Now a long dress: Red velvet with a red velvet belt and a red silk panel down middle. Now another dress getting applause: A black and red dress with another large scale image silk screened on. Now a black velvet full skirt with black silk top and patent belt. Third look to get applause: a suit in black velvet with exaggerated pony hair collar and bottom. Flapper dress with furry fringe bottom. One more look! Long black stretch velvet dress with giant stole and knit panel down center. That's the closer. Applause from crowd: It definitely looked more like a collection than Sweet P's. Chris is crying and screaming "thank you" and hugging "his" model, who is also black and was incidentally my year at Tufts, if I remember correctly.

10:06: Next w have Jillian: place goes insane again. She is sosososo cute!
She says she's so proud to be here, showing very first collection, she hopes we see her inspiration and feel inspired as well.

10:07: First look: wow this is awesome. Applause from crowd. Greenish pinstripe jacket with big collar and knit hood underneath. Next look is a mini skirt with architectural pleats and a knit hat, black turtleneck. Next are jodpuhrs and a knit jacket. Next is a gold minidress with sheer black overlay. Next is a olive velvet jacket with a ruffled mini skirt. Next look gets applause; a knit black and white striped top with a deep scoop neck and these crazy pom pom sleeves paired with an olive tweed skirt. Next is a hooded jacket and flouncy long skirt. Now a knit sweater with cutouts and skinny pants. Now this cool armor jacket with knit tights.

10:10 AM: More applause for dress with this silvery bottom with tulle overlay
Next: velvet blue draped dress. Next is a corset top dress with pleated metallic black long skirt; it's the closer and it's awesome. Big applause from crowd I hope she wins. "Most wearable", says woman next to me.

10:13: Now is Rami. He looks smug. He's "very excited to be here with us as we experience this moment". He says his collection is a celebration of women. He says women should be cherished and treated as muses every day of their lives. Now he is coughing. But not crying.

10:14: First look: its teal and draped, but it has a corset built-in. It has puffy shoulders a la Christian. Next teal suit with a mini skirt and draping where the jacket comes in at waist. Next is a strapless graphic black and white dress: it is, of course, draped, but it got applause. Now we have skinny hot pink pants and a big blouse with black vest. Now a hot pink draped tent dress with puffy sleeves. Now a hot pink skirt, mini lots of detailing with shiny black blouse. High waisted pants with obi belt get applause. That's with a pink blouse with built in cape. Olive green pants and a one-shoulder draped top. Final look is a gown in olive: combo of draping and weave work gets applause. Ah one more look! Gold draped goddess gown: Beautiful. Shit wait one more!. Big applause for this really intricately constructed gold dress. With this beautiful trumpet skirt. And one more! [Oy. -Ed.] Black dress with trumpet skirt and all these crazy little tags of fabric layered upon each other. The eveningwear he showed was very impressive. I could do without his separates and day wear, on the whole.

10:20: And last but not least we have Christian and his stupid haircut. He says thank you for coming: this collection means a lot to him. He says everyone looks fierce. His first look is so perfect for Posh: A full black to the knee skirt that literally blossoms, and a metallic black turtleneck. Next is skinny pants and black hip-length skirted jacket; next is another short very architectural jacket. More black: Another jacket and pants combo.

10:23: I can't believe I'm saying this: his collection rocks. Now a sheer black blouse and skinny pants. Now this full felt jacket hat got big applause, built-in layer like his couture dress. Now skinny black pants and a truly couture-looking ruffled white high blouse so high it covers her face. Now a cream Christian jacket and trousers. More skinny pants with a giant sleeved cream blouse with a maroon felt full jacket belted over. Now a top that looks like his couture dress. Huge applause. HugER applause for a gown that has cream on one side, brown on other and is intricately layered. Finally, a long feathered gown: layers upon layers. He really went all out, says woman next to me. No way can't he win. He was the best by far. Wow: the kid's got talent. And I can imagine Posh in all of it!!!!

10:25: He is now posing on the runway and his model is laughing at him.

10:28: Okay, Heidi back out: she says best finale ever. She says she knows judging is going to be hard and says thanks to fans and media for covering, and told us all "Auf Wiedersehen - you can go now!"

10:30: Niki Taylor is telling me she has no favorites; she says they were all amazing, and she's really glad she doesn't have to do the judging!

10:35: Trying to get to Heidi now. . Reporters are just tossing questions
She says she's never had to fight for one of her choices; that it's Sheits pretty diplomatic and there's usually a consensus. She also says that Victoria called Bravo and asked to be a judge on the show

10:40: Kara Janx: She thinks finale was so not amateur, so professional; she says toss up for her between Jillian, Christian and Rami, that she loved all three and thinks they were equally strong in different ways. Ted Allen: Leaning towards Sweet P. He says he's classic in that way. He says he's never left the finale saying he loved everyone's collection.

10:45: Okay, headed home; pics will be up shortly.

1:32 a.m. Hey guys. Pretty Hillary Chelsea photo, yes? Thanks to reader George who emailed in to tell me why he voted for Obama even though I never emailed him with a convincing argument as to why he ought to. I was very convincingly on death's doorstep George, but I sent ESP through the ghost of John Kenneth Galbraith via Jesus via Mike Huckabee. Surely you saw him on the TV tonight telling everyone how much he respects John McCain? That was code!

12:25 a.m. Wolf is projecting victory for Hillary in California.

12:20 a.m. Um, so did California not get the memo that John Edwards dropped out? Or is that 11% of the thus-counted California vote just a testament to the state's long-term commitment to good hair?

12:18 a.m. Ohhhhhhh... Lunesta commercial...........................

12:15 a.m. Missouri goes back to Barry! Or maybe!?!

12:13 a.m. California results are watchable here and here for your realtime freakout pleasure. Clinton is leading in the first 5% of ballots cast in every single county. I don't know what this means but I think we all heard the candidates talk tonight about the moms working late and pulling that second shift. This race is all about the procrastinator vote.

12:04 a.m. Oh wow, you really are reading! Eh, I maybe passed out for a minute. Barry has such a nice voice...

11:52 p.m. Obama just said something about how it's "not about who's up and who's down..." It's about who's crying now, Barry?? Hillary is still leading in California.

11:36 p.m. It's weird to be doing this when I know fucking no one is reading it. SinisterRouge for America's Next Top Jezebel editor...

11:30 p.m. Doh! Georgia goes to Huckabee. And apparently the cities of Missouri are still streaming in so it's too close to call for HIl bc only white people (who are not "cool") like her etc. etc.

11:27 p.m. So Missouri — I thought we called Missouri awhile ago, but whatev — looks like it's going to Clinton, despite the appearance of Paul Rudd at a recent Obama rally there. Sigh. Utah looks like a maybe for Obama. And no one can figure out which Republican gets Georgia.

11:20 p.m. Ok, switched to CNN, ironically on account of that Liberty Mutual commercial with the awful Sarah McLachlanesque awful song that plays like 397 times an hour on CNN. They're talking about how the Latins hate Obama again. This is every pundit's favorite demographic trend. But personally, I loved how a Spanish radio pundit went on MSNBC this morning and said: "We Latins couldn't be happier! None of the leading candidates want to deport all of us to Guantanamo or whatever!"

11:15 p.m. Hillary just won Arizona. Maybe scratch that delegate count thing?!

11:14 p.m. Obama is leading the delegate count for the evening. That is, according to the Obama campaign he is.

11:07 p.m. Chris Matthews, Mike Huckabee and Keith Olbermann are all talking and they are all agreeing with one another because what they are talking about is how much they hate Mitt Romney. We should introduce that guy to the Luos and the Kikuyus next!

11:03 p.m. McCain wins ARIZONA!!!! And Barry wins Idaho. Nice try, Idaho, I am still not forgiving you for those effing Denise Austin potato commercials.

10:57 p.m. Hillary talking. "I won't let anyone swift boat this country's future." Ha ha ha because she will crush them. Hillary sees an America where we stand up to the oil companies and the oil producing countries COUGH COUGH Dubai COUGH. Oooooooh, now she's congratulating Obama!!! Keeping the old Hill-Barry ticket fantasy alive! She looks forward to future debates — ha ha she'll CRUSH you, Barry! — okay so this is a really good speech. The polls are now closed in California. God it's about time.

10:52 p.m. Oh yay she's talking! And again, yellow...hmm. Ooooh she mentioned American Samoa. Where are the Girl Scout cookies when you just ate a pint of Half Baked and you've given up?

10:47 p.m. Browser crashed. I was in the middle of some screed re that Brooks column I brought up before everything went haywire. Look, dudes. Anyone — anyone, under any circumstances, but especially to a potential ally — who says "I will crush you" or "I will destroy you" or whatever, is lame. Period. I don't care I don't care I don't care. Not giving Hillary a pass bc she doesn't have an overabundance of testosterone to credit. But the more important part is, if I am supposed to give her credit for anything she did from 1992 to 2000 aside from needlessly alienating everyone on Capitol Hill with a health-care plan that a more diplomatic personality might have salvaged and, oh yeah, hiring Dick Morris back to win the 96 election, why won't the Clintons release the papers that might elucidate what exactly the fuck that was? That's all.

10:27 p.m. Obama won Connecticut, spoiling the whole "Tri-state trifecta" plan everyone as of an hour ago thought was going to take it home for HIllary. Connecticut, you see, is where all the hedge fund managers live, and...well that's the "audacity" part...aw shit maybe we should just give this one up to the success of evil misogynist propaganda? Whatev, that's like two more delegates...

10:26 p.m. SHOCKER: Romney wins Utah.

10:13 p.m. Kansas just went for Obama 72-27! Suck it, Hillary, that's like a palindrome or something!?! Anyway I just got another email from one of those people who sent me some link full of reasons to vote for Hillary if you have ever in your life endured sexism that I did not find very convincing, and now she says "I hate that you act like I have to vote for Obama bc that's what all the cool kids are doing!!!" Seriously, do you expect me to also explain why Garden State sucked? Maybe because I am not in college I do not get this line of reasoning. I had a friend who claimed I liked Obama bc I like hip-hop culture, and I was like "I suppose that would make sense, if it were 1989 and the apotheosis of hip-hop culture was like, The Low-End Theory, but have you ever heard of 50 Cent?" And that made me wonder: is that the kind of college crowd Obama is attracting? The a cappella singing, jazz history minoring, hackeysack douche whose only redeeming quality is that he owns the Low End Theory contingent? Did that contingent even continue to exist after 1997? And does Shepard Fairey play into this somehow? Anyway, any thoughts/enlightening statements are welcome.

10:12 p.m. Mike Huckabee is talking or something. Wait, who's that tall broad behind him who is not Chuck Norris' hot wife?

10:02 p.m. Obama is projected to win North Dakota. They must have like at least 1.3 delegates right?

9:54 p.m. Oh god, do I really have to pay attention to Mike Huckabee again? Because he won Alabama...by 2,000 votes? Fuck this. Mike Huckabee will endorse McCain, and then McCain will get all the Jesus people to vote for him and ... this Purina Fancy Feast commercial makes me want to inflict cruelty to actresses who nuzzle fluffy white cats to regurgitated jazz standards.

9:42 p.m. So...the big disappointment for McCain is that he's winning big in Blue States? So, like, the Red State Republicans are just going to stay home? Rather than vote against the Clintons for a bona fide war hero? It's just kinda hard to believe that the average Republican hates McCain as much as the average race-bating, immigrant-demonizing Jack Abramoff-BFFing secretary porking (see what I did there? pork? Hah) Capitol Hill Republican. I dunno though.

9:35 p.m. Scarbrough and Buchanan have just agreed on the evening's takeaway thus far! It's been a BIG disappointment for John McCain. Because Mitt Romney managed to win his home state.

9:32 p.m. Alabama just went to Obama and Huckabee. (Hey, just like Iowa!) And it might happen in Georgia, too; it's allegedly too close to call...

9:27 p.m. Some bottle blonde on Fox is talking about how Massachusetts must've gone for Clinton bc it's one of those blue collar hick states where they don't really like blacks.

9:26 p.m. California polls still open for another 94 minutes! God, I am soooooo energized.

9:24 p.m. Why is everyone on Fox News so stoked right now? I thought all those GOP shills, like, hated John McCain!!

9:23 p.m. Dear SinisterRouge, why.

9:15 p.m. So, catching up on Megan's, it started off a pretty positive night for Obama, but now Hillary's projected to be the winner in New Jersey, New York, Arkansas and Massachusetts, while Obama took Delaware. Those were all states that he was trying and, now apparently failing, to gain on Hillary in. McCain's also apparently taking New York.

8:40 p.m. Hey, so you'll have to give me a few minutes to get situated. I feel like shit. Did you read David Brooks today? I only did because it's number two on the Most Emailed list.