Claudia Schiffer Does Not Exactly Have Much To Hide

• Well, someone is looking perky at 37. But who? Dodai likes this cover but I'm against stupid masks being used to conceal the mugs of celebrities I haven't seen enough of. I feel like the last I saw Claudia Schiffer was in her exercise video. [Telegraph]
  
• Celeb stylist Phillip Bloch got a little taste of Abu Ghraib when he got thrown out of a Kanye West concert at Madison Square Garden for hanging out with a bunch of teenage girls who were smoking pot. "They never asked for ID, never asked for my name. It was complete brutality," he says. [NY Post]
  
• "Remember, when our customer tightens their belt, it's generally ostrich or alligator." That's Neiman Marcus CEO Burt Tansky, just echoing Thomas Frank's sentiments on the ruins of the "man-made catastrophe that proceeded directly from the deliberate beatdown of organized labor and the wrecking of the liberal state." [Slate]
  
• Making one's rack look and feel respectable is hard enough without forcing bras to perform additional functions like transporting wine and crap, but leave it to the Japanese to invent a solar-powered bra that can charge a cell phone. [Reuters]

God Bless Ridiculous Fashion Folk, Every One Of Them

• God bless Vivienne Westwood for being so undeniably herself. Says the fashion designer-cum-philosopher: "I'd like to do less, but there are people dependent on me now. My thing has always been, just let me finish this pair of trousers and then I can read my book. We've all got to wear something, I suppose. So my advice would be to buy quality. Choose well. I think there's a certain status in seeing someone wearing the same thing over and over again." [Vogue UK]
  
• God bless Heidi Klum. She's just so wise: "[Take] time out for yourself so you can engage in an activity that you really enjoy. [Also, don't] neglect the romance in your life. [And] wear pretty lingerie if you don't want to feel schlumpy." [Vogue UK]
  
• God bless Donatella Versace for saying at the Times Talks on Sunday that her fashion motto is "Don't let the rappers wear more bling than you do!" and that she hopes to be reincarnated as Maya Rudolph. [Fashion Week Daily]

Is Marie Claire Taking Over Elle's Sloppy Project Runway Seconds?

• More rumored changes for The Greatest Show On Earth, Project Runway: Season 6 of the show, the first to be broadcast on Lifetime, may feature "More Than A Pretty Face" magazine Marie Claire in lieu of Elle as the affiliated fashion magazine sponsor. [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Whoah: Are New York Times fashion critic Cathy Horyn and Skeletor/stylist Rachel Zoe more similar than we could have ever imagined? Possibly, if it's true that Cathy Horyn was also mysteriously not invited to the dinner and dancing portion of tonight's Costume Institute festivities. [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• And what does legendary costume designer Bob Mackie not like about the fashion industry? "Doing a fashion show that's on for 20 minutes and then it's over and everybody runs to the next one. Nobody sings, nobody dances, nobody tells jokes. I found it quite unsatisfying." I second that emotion. [WWD, sub req'd]

Harvey Weinstein's Out To Get Nina Garcia, But In A Good Way

• "We'll get her," says Harvey Weinstein of ELLE's Nina Garcia (Weinstein) is being sued for breach of contract for taking Project Runway from Bravo to Lifetime. While Weinstein is probably the first person to say anything about wanting to continue to work with Garcia, we find his statement more creepy than encouraging. [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• "I am fine alone now, but not when I'll be 90," says Giorgio Armani of having a private equity firm get involved in his business. [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• "Buying vintage or revamping clothes and making things myself is my take on helping the environment." Oh bite me, Zooey Deschanel. [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• "I used to consider myself Italian, but now I feel very European." —Margherita Missoni. [Fashion Week Daily]

Lifetime's Latest Sobfest: The Death Of Project Runway

Lifetime Movie Premiere Brings Out The Worst In Some Stars

Kate Hudson Gets Creative; Heather Locklear Goes Lifetime

*Inspired by Shirley MacLaine's assertion that the best parts for actresses fall into one of the above categories

How Women's Television Is Just Like Sex And The City

Slate's TV columnist Troy Patterson parses the programming on the three women's television networks today, and, reading Patterson's descriptions of each lady network, I had to wonder: could the networks be categorized using the ultimate post-modern archetypes, Sex and the City characters? It is the Most Important Show of Our Time, after all. The answer I came up with?:Of course they can.

With its rude, slutty and unapologetic programming, Oxygen is clearly Samantha. Strippers fellating beer bottles, plastic surgery advocating Janice Dickinson and her modeling agency, and re-runs of Absolutely Fabulous just scream Samantha with their combination of glitter, foul mouths and trash. (Remember when Carrie caught Samantha blowing the UPS guy? Total Oxygen material.)