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"I'm Pregnant," And Other "Lies" Twitterers Say Women Tell
New York, 4:32 PM
Tue Dec 8
74 posts in the last 24 hours
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"I'm Pregnant," And Other "Lies" Twitterers Say Women Tell |
Original material is licensed under a Creative Commons License permitting non-commercial sharing with attribution.
06/04/09
Women's fiction is a Lifetime Original Movie screenplay.
Women's fiction is written in small blurbs underneath pictures of celebrities.
Women's fiction is written every day, by idiots who say that there is no glass ceiling.
Women's fiction is being cataloged on Twitter, under the tag #liesgirlstell.
05/28/09
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05/28/09
Also, unicorns are all complete and total jerks so I'm glad people are exposing their lies, lies, and lies. Unicorns are MEAN.
05/28/09
05/28/09
"i'm getting back to work on the massive presentation i'm giving tomorrow" #lieshippichxtells
05/28/09
Do men generally lie about being pregnant? I've never encountered this, and he really wouldn't be believed anyway, for obvious biological reasons.
Sadly, I do know one girl that has done the pregnancy lie (not that that makes the Twitter feed less offensive). Except she did it at a party, in front of other people and her boyfriend, and it was the first her boyfriend knew about it. And then it turned out to be a lie anyway. Drama! And sigh, yes, they are still together.
05/28/09
05/28/09
"Yes, I'm working right now" #lieskathrynwithaytells
05/28/09
05/28/09
Is that not true? Have I been lied to?
Regardless, I'd still do it for reciprocation's sake.
05/28/09
I mean, I definitely do it with my husband, but when I was younger, I did it thinking it something you had to do, and it was really upsetting and damaging for me then. To this day, I still have trouble enjoying it because of bad experiences when I was younger, doing something I really did not want to be doing.
05/28/09
Also, I don't believe that people weren't having oral/anal sex in previous generations. This is why every generation thinks they invented sex. "No you didn't! I bet your grandparents are doing the same things you are!"
05/28/09
I definitely agree in the reciprocal nature of this. For awhile I dated a man who wasn't comfortable going down on women, and I respected that. He definitely got less attention as a result (!) but he never complained because he appreciated it at all. He didn't feel he was owed anything and understood it is a personal preference.
Luckily, I've married a more generous man, and like Birthday Girl said, that's helped make me more interested in giving back. But I still struggle with it because I'd like to enjoy it the way so many women say they do, but I just don't. And I think a lot of that has to do with rushing into it to begin with and having some bad experiences.
05/28/09
05/28/09
But dude... we've all had that one friend that totally did lie about being pregnant. We weren't happy about it but we didn't cut her off, either.
05/28/09
05/28/09
Sluts.
05/28/09
05/28/09
"I'm not a rapist" #liesunicornstell
05/28/09
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05/28/09
- "Of course you're the only one for me, Baby!"
- "No, I've never had a venereal disease!"
- "That's right, I'm a pilot/doctor/actor."
- "What are you talking about? I love your parents!"
- "I'm just going out drinkin' wit ma boyz!"
05/28/09
-"I'll pull out."
-"We're just friends."
05/28/09
05/28/09
"I swear I didn't put your bras in the dryer."
"Just let me stick in tip in." (I fall for that one EVERY TIME my husband says it!!!!)
05/28/09
05/28/09
It's sad that I even have to do this.
05/28/09
Seriously, if a dude gets all pissy about that, then what manly, appealing qualities can he possibly have?
05/28/09
Where are said guys? I need to meet them.
The reason this whole thing makes me mad is because if a girl says "I'm not into oral sex" and then a guy pressures her into doing it and she does it doesn't mean she was lying about being into it.
By the same token if you nag and nag and nag a girl about trying anal and she eventually gives in, that doesn't mean she was lying when she said she didn't want to try it. It just means that you're a whiny baby.
I have a theory that if (some) men find something really sexually pleasurable, they lose all sense of how much their partner is or isn't enjoying it and tend to erroneously think that she must find it pleasurable by virtue of the fact that they themselves are enjoying it so much. Like a "how could something that's so good for me be bad for her?" mentality (maybe I should say MANtality?)
05/28/09
OK, I know we're just joking around here (and I am too), but every time I hear a woman complain about what guys are supposedly into, I want to ask: Come on, there are plenty of guys who don't do X behavior -- isn't it possible that you just happen to be attracted to the type of guys who do do that? (E.g., in this case, mama's boys who can't handle getting what they want in every instance.)
In any case, to answer your question, we're generally outside and playing sports. Sometimes we go to bed early so we can get up the next day for practice or hiking.
05/28/09
Yes of course I washed my hands before dinner! #liestoddlerstell
I did not get my hair all over your favorite chair while you were gone #liespetstell
I am a crucial force in the current type II metagame #lieskithkinstell