Thanksgiving combines two things that are awesome but riddled with double entendres: eating and watching American football. Let's celebrate them in combination with a cornucopia of hot football players who we would mind basting our turkey.

At Slate, Robert Weintraub notes some unfortunate Super Bowl trivia: "The big game's two biggest stars, [Santonio] Holmes and [Larry] Fitzgerald, have both been accused of domestic assault." So why aren't we talking about it?