Jezebel: ladymag lookback

Awesome British Lass Gives Women's Magazines Her Best Left Hook

Anna — Wed, 20 Feb 2008 16:00:00 EST

We love to complain that the greatest crime perpetuated by women's magazine editors that they publish the old same crap under different covers month after month, year after year. Well, yesterday, we were directed to a website, Faking Good Breeding, on which a Smith College coed posted an excerpt from "What Every Woman Knows By Now", an Atlantic article about this most favorite of our irritations. The piece — written by British novelist/critic Marghanita Laski (no, not like the drink, or the Italian fashion heiress) — is better than anything we could ever dream up: In less than a thousand words, Laski (seen above left in 1934) hilariously and accurately calls bullshit on the stuff that modern women's periodicals are made of, and proves that nothing ever changes when it comes to shilling "femininity" on the newsstand and trafficking in man-anxiety. Her amazing ladymag manifesto-of-sorts — did we mention it was written in 1950? — after the jump.

"What Every Woman Knows By Now", from the "Accent On Living" section of the May 1950 issue of the Atlantic.

It is as much a source of amazement as of income to me that readers of the women's magazines have such an insatiable thirst for reading the same information over and over again, despite the fact that any one year's reading must inevitably give enough information about the technique of being a woman to see one through a lifetime. I have, then, no fear of spoiling the market, either for myself or others. Every subject in this symposium, given a snappy title and an angle that appeals to the editor, will still be worth a substantial fee.
ACCESSORIES
The simplest are in the best taste.
Men like women to be in the best taste.

BROKEN HEARTS
Find a new interest
Time cures all.
Men don't like women to ring them up.

CARE OF FACE
Remove old make-up with cream (dry skins), lotion (oily skins), or superfatted soap (if you must).
Then dab face with an astringent lotion.
Then pat in nourishing cream.
Blackheads are frequently due to internal causes. Drink lots of water.
Men are repelled by pimples.

CHARM
Charm is an indefinable quality.
Men like it.

CLOTHES
Choose the clothes that suit you.
You can be perfectly dressed at every income level.
Little touches of white must be immaculate.
Diagonal stripes are slimming.
Invest your all in one good little black dress (or tweed suit).
Don't go in for clutter but have lots of bits and pieces that will make one outfit do the work of ten.
Men like black satin, well-cut tweeds, floating tulle, utter simplicity, and don't notice what you wear anyway.

CULTURE
Read good books sometimes.
Men don't like cultured women much.

FIGURE
Figure deficiencies are frequently glandular. Consult your doctor.
A good corset can correct many figure faults. Have it fitted by an expert.
Good exercises can correct bad figures. Here are some.
Men like good figures.

FURS
If you can't afford good furs don't have any, but there are some awfully cheap ones in the shops.
Men are impressed by mink — but then, so are you.

HAIR ON THE HEAD
The condition of the hair reflects the general health.
Massage with the finger tips stimulates the scalp.
Brush fifty times a day and wash at least every fortnight.
Choose the hair style that suits you and don't get into a rut.
No moral opprobrium is attached to dye.
Men love those gleaming tresses.

HAIR, SUPERFULOUS
In the armpits remove by depilatory.
On the legs remove by depilatory, wax, sandpaper, or razor; the last will coarsen the new growth.
On the face remove by wax (will weaken growth) or by electrolysis (will kill it).
If the growth is slight, bleach with peroxide-and-ammonia.
Men notice superfluous hair.

HANDS
Before doing rough work smooth a protective cream over your hands.
After washing, smooth a creamy lotion over your hands.
Make your hands flexible by shaking in one way or another.
File your nails to the shape that suits you.
Press back your cuticles after you've had a bath.
Chipped polish looks slovenly.
Men abhor scarlet talons.

JEWELRY
One big good piece is better than a lot of little cheap trinkets.
One big cheap piece is better than a lot of little good ones.
In fact, One Big Piece is Best.
Men are better if they like jewelry.

MAKE-UP
Smooth on foundation cream or lotion, not forgetting neck.
Add rouge where it improves the natural shape of your face.
Add discreet eye-shadow and mascara on the upper lids only.
Paint outline of lips with a brush, fill in with lipstick, blot on a tissue, powder, and add more lipstick.
Press in powder over face and neck; remove surplus.
Men don't like women to be obviously made up.

MANNERS
Be sweet to old people.
Be kind to his mother.
Be nice to other girls — they have brothers.
Don't comb your hair or clean your nails in public.
Don't order direct from the waiter.
Don't swear or drink too much.
Men hate red marks on coffee cups.

MARRIAGE
Enter it joyously and proudly.
Remember you've got to take as well as give.
There are all sorts of compensations.
Men should be encouraged to wash up.

PERFUME
Choose the perfume that suits you.
Spray it onto your body but never onto your clothes.
Test new perfume by trying a drop on the back of your hand.
Have different perfumes for different moods or make one perfume distinctively YOU.
Men are enraptured by perfume.

SHOPPING
Either go with an open mind or with a rigidly-to-be-adhered-to list.
Either enlist the help of the shop assistant or don't let her make up your mind for you.
Either men like shopping or — more usually — they don't.

SHYNESS
Prepare a few conversational remarks to break the ice.
Try to put the other person at his ease.
Instruct yourself in current affairs.
Join a club.
Men like a woman to be a good listener.

SPECIAL OCCASIONS
Cream hands thickly and sleep in gloves the night before.
Try to fit in a facial and a hair-do.
Rest for an hour with your feet up and pads over your eyes.
Make up extra specially carefully.
Oh, men, men, men.

TOP SECRET
Consult your doctor.
Send us a stamped addressed envelope.
Men are beasts.

What Every Woman Knows By Now [The Atlantic, fee required]
Women's Magazines...So Little Changes In 50 Years [Faking Good Breeding]
Marghanita Laski [Wikipedia]

Earlier: The Five Great Lies Of Women's Magazines

'CCC': The LiveJournal For Bored '30s Housewives

Dodai — Wed, 03 Oct 2007 17:00:00 EDT

Today's Daily Mail has a long but interesting story about the creation of Britain's first women's magazine. In 1935, a young mother wrote a letter to a publication called Nursery World:

Can any mother help me? I live a very lonely life as I have no near neighbours. I cannot afford to buy a wireless. I adore reading, but with no library am very limited with books. I dislike needlework, though I have to do a lot of it! I get so down and depressed after the children are in bed and I am alone in the house. I know it is bad to brood and breed hard thoughts and resentment. Can any reader suggest an occupation that will intrigue me and exclude "thinking" and cost nothing?

According to the article, women from all over the country wrote back expressing similar frustrations. They were intelligent women who found themselves married and confined to their homes, not exactly fulfilled by their roles as housewives and mothers. The solution? They started a private magazine, a place where all of their ideas and opinions could be expressed.

Each woman, writing under a nom de plume, would contribute an article on any subject and post it to the editor, who would assemble the articles. She would mail the completed magazine to the first woman on a pre-arranged list, who had a set amount of time to read it, and who would add her own comments on the pages before sending it on to the next member.

The women dubbed this project the Cooperative Correspondence Club, or CCC, and there were up to 24 members at any one time. There was only one copy of the magazine every 2 weeks, so, often, more than one issue would circulate at a time. The stories were about motherhood, life during wartime, marriage, and the struggles of a daily routine. As cheesy as it sounds, what's fascinating is that this urge, desire — to bond with other women through the written word, read their stories and secrets, without actually knowing or meeting them — sounds a lot like what we do right here everyday. Just a moment of sincerity. We'll be back to jaded and superficial before you know it.

'Can Any Mother Help Me?' The Question That Inspired Britain's First Women's Magazine More Than 70 Years Ago [Daily Mail]

"You Are My Favorite Halloween Witch": Kooky 'Cosmo' Editor Helen Gurley Brown

Anna — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 11:00:00 EDT

Looking back at old issues of Cosmopolitan, we've come to the realization that former Cosmo editor Helen Gurley Brown was not only obsessed with calorie-restriction and randomly-exposed breasts, but that she was just plain crazy (in a charming way, that is). Take her editor's letters: The name-dropping! The strange transitions! (She goes from singing Barbara Walters' praises to discussing the new trend of eye-lifts among younger women without so much as a lead-in.) The awkward use of italics! After the jump, Helen's October 1977 Cosmopolitan editor's letter, which covers everything from lack of libido and ex-wives to Frank Sinatra, Walter Cronkite, and eating lobsters with Jaws star Roy Scheider.

(Click on image to enlarge)

Earlier: 'Cosmpolitan' Celebrates "Plump Women", 'Playboy' Style
Helen Gurley Brown Still Alive & Kicking, Still Hates Her Muffin-Top

In 'Cosmopolitan', White Women Have All The Fun

Anna — Fri, 21 Sep 2007 13:00:00 EDT

Apparently white women were the only ones having lots of drunk, safe sex in the late '70s: Another curious thing about the October 1977 issue of Cosmopolitan is that there is nary a woman of color to be found, both on editorial and advertising pages. Except Iman! The Somali model (then 22 years old) had an entire advertising spread all to her lonesome... shilling for some scent called "Tigress". (Because nothing says "wild" or "provoking" than an East African woman clad in gold lamé). The advertisement, after the jump.

(Click on image to enlarge)

'Cosmopolitan' Celebrates "Plump" Women, 'Playboy' Style

Anna — Thu, 20 Sep 2007 12:00:00 EDT

Before women's magazines relied on the adjective "curvy" to help them describe any female with a body-mass index of over 20 (or a cup-size of C and above), they preferred the word "plump". (Or "cushiony"!) Below, a four-page spread from the October 1977 issue of Cosmopolitan meant to celebrate the idea that "Plump Is Pretty" that ends up coming off as something more appropriate for Playboy.

Earlier: What Are 'Curves'? Jessica Alba Adds To The Confusion

30 Years of 'Cosmo': Sex, Drugs & Sperm-Killers

Anna — Wed, 19 Sep 2007 16:00:00 EDT

More fun with the October issues of Cosmopolitan! Below, a gallery of advertisements that fall squarely into the "vice" category (i.e. they're all about sex, booze, smokes & contraception). Our favorite: The advertisement for Fredrick's of Hollywood's "Elite VII", which, unlike men, "doesn't stay out with the boys."

Earlier: 30 Years Of 'Cosmo' Ads: Scents, Spirits, Cigarettes & Sex
30 Years Of 'Cosmopolitan': It's All About The Sex & Hair

30 Years of 'Cosmo' Ads: Scents, Spirits, Cigarettes & Sex

Anna — Tue, 18 Sep 2007 15:30:00 EDT

Yesterday, we kicked off our first Ladymag Lookback with a look at the differences in cover models and cover lines from three decades of Cosmopolitan: October '77, '87, '97, and '07. Today we're doing a mini-analysis of the advertising contained within each issue. Here's the narrative rundown: In addition to lots of paid-for pictures of lipstick, nail polish and perfume, the older issues of Cosmo are notable for reflecting what looked to be rampant (yet unsurprising) alcohol and tobacco abuse among its readers. Marlboro cigarettes were a favorite - ads for the brand appear in every issue we looked at... except for the current 2007 issue, which features one tobacco advertisement — for the controversial R.J. Reynolds brand Camel No. 9 ("Now Available In Stiletto"). Alcohol — particularly tequila — is everywhere as well, although, much like tobacco, it is in much higher evidence in the older issues. (Special treat: The 1987 issue features a full-page printed PSA warning against the dangers of cocaine use.)

As for sex, strangely, of the four issues analyzed, there is an equal total number of ads for fertility devices/conception products and contraceptive devices. (This, in a magazine founded and long-edited by the writer of Sex And The Single Girl?).

And while we're on the subject of vaginas? Apparently women didn't get yeast infections back in the fall of 1977. The first ad for a yeast infection treatment crops up in the October 1997 issue; in the issues for the two previous decades, the only ads related to a woman's reproductive organs are those for sanitary napkins, tampons and things like "herbal-scented" douches and "feminine deodorant suppositories"... also available in "unscented" or an "herbal". Below, some numbers:

1977 - 335 pages
Number of perfume ads: 18

Number of ads for liquor or mixers: 21

Number of ads for cigarettes: 13

Number of ads for contraceptives: 2
Number of ads for fertility/conception aids: 0

1987 — 331 pages
Number of perfume ads: 15

Number of ads for liquor or mixers: 8

Number of ads for cigarettes: 7

Number of ads for contraceptives: 2
Number of ads for fertility/conception aids: 6

1997 - 297 pages
Number of perfume ads: 15

Number of ads for liquor or mixers: 1

Number of ads for cigarettes: 4

Number of ads for contraceptive products: 1
Number of ads for fertility/conception aids: 0

2007 - 269 pages
Number of perfume ads: 14

Number of ads for liquor or mixers: 3

Number of ads for cigarettes: 1

Number of ads for contraceptive products: 2
Number of ads for fertility/conception aids: 1

Earlier: 30 Years of 'Cosmopolitan': It's All About The Sex And Hair
Helen Gurley Brown Still Alive & Kicking; Still Hates Her Muffin-Top