[New York, October 8. Image via INF]

[New York, September 14. Image via INF]

[New York, September 9. Image via WENN]

[New York, September 8. Image via INF]

• Rihanna will appear on the September 14 launch of The Jay Leno Show — her first performance since being assaulted by Chris Brown in February. But she won't be alone:

She's performing "Run This Town" with Jay-Z and Kanye West, which is a track from Jay-Z's new album. [People]

• Matthew Broderick: "I am truly shocked and saddened by the news about my old friend John Hughes. He was a wonderful, very talented guy and my heart goes out to his family." [E!]
• Molly Ringwald: "I was stunned and incredibly sad to hear about the death of John Hughes. He was and will always be such an important part of my life. He will be missed — by me and by everyone that he has touched. My heart and all my thoughts are with his family now." [ET, People]
• Jon Cryer, aka Duckie from Pretty In Pink, on the death of John Hughes: "This is a horrible tragedy. He was an amazing man to work for and with. He respected young actors in a way that made you realize you had to step up your game because you were playing in the big leagues now. That's why he got such great performances out of his actors. My heart goes out to his wife Nancy and their children." [ET]
• Old habits die hard: Amy Winehouse "is still clearly emotional, and seems to suck her thumb when times are bad." Yes, there are pictures. [Daily Mail]
• Paula Abdul may make a deal with American Idol — if they give her what she wants, which is $10 million a year. [TMZ]
• Meanwhile, Paula says: "At this point, there are so many wonderful things that are being offered to me. And I got to take a deep breath, sleep a little ... and go through everything." [AP]
• Um, Constantine Maroulis got his ass kicked trying to defend Paula Abdul's honor or something. [Gatecrasher]
• Blech: Heidi Montag is oompa-loompa orange on her Playboy cover, and covered in dirt. [Perez]
• Hotter than Heidi is 51-year-old Sharon Stone, topless in Paris Match. In the immortal words of Cassie: Stop acting like you haven't seen a titty before. [TheLifeFiles]
• "Jon Gosselin's guide to being a lothario: manipulation and neediness." LOL. A psychotherapist says: "He's picking up a lot of women who are trying to rescue him… Jon's not the faithful type. Men like him are very good at connecting with women, and the woman starts to feel as if he is there for her. But he's just there to boost his own ego." [NY Daily News]
• Despite what was reported in the Post yesterday, Kristin Davis denies that she cut ties as a goodwill ambassador for the human rights group Oxfam. [NY Daily News]
• Paris Hilton and Doug Reinhardt are back together, and were seen on an Air Pacific Flight to Red Bull Island. Yes, Red Bull Island. Not a joke. Can't wait to see them do this again. [Page Six]
• If you have tickets for Madonna's concert in Ljubljana, Slovenia, you are one of a select few: The show's been canceled, and poor ticket sales are reportedly the reason. Although her peeps say "unforeseen logistical difficulties" are the reason. [Reuters]
• From a profile on Charlene Yi: "Ms. Yi walked the short red carpet in wet brown suede shoes and a red cardigan sweater. After posing for pictures, she picked up the olive-drab Army backpack she had left with a publicist after posing for pictures. Ms. Yi told reporters that she had never dated Michael Cera. 'Gossipers!' she yelped. 'You are all gossipers!' Well, why did she pick him to play her onscreen boyfriend in the first place? 'Martin Lawrence passed,' she quipped. Touché!" [Observer]
• Charlene Yi says of Michael Cera: "We were never together. If we were, I'd like to know when that was. And thank God, because it would be devastating to promote this film if I was heartbroken." [The Daily Beast]
• Bethenny Frankel is trying to get pregnant. [Page Six]
• Leonardo DiCaprio: Spotted hanging out with Sports Illustrated swimsuit model, Anne Vyalitsyna. [Page Six]
• Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore were flying to New York when their plane had to make an emergency landing in Las Vegas after the engine overheated. No one was injured, and both actors Tweeted about their experience, because if you don't put it on Twitter, it never happened, right? [People]
• Jermaine Jackson is "cashing in" on Michael Jackson's death by releasing a recording of "Smile," the song he performed at the memorial. Plus, he's working on a series of tribute concerts. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Jermaine says: "In his death, I have found a mission for my life. My existence is now dedicated to spreading Michael's message." [Mirror]
• "Michael Jackson was scheduled to undergo a second physical by an insurance company doctor at the time of his death." [LA Times]
• David Letterman has beat Conan O'Brien in ratings for the fourth week in a row. i'll admit it: I'm on team Dave. [NY Daily News]
• Nora Ephron writes "In Defense of Ryan O'Neal": "Ryan O'Neal had not seen his daughter Tatum in years. He thought she was a Swedish person. I completely understand. The truth is that had I been gay, I might have accidentally made a pass at my own sister in a mall in Las Vegas. So who's to judge? Not me." [HuffPo]
• Queen Latifah and five ladyfriends hit a lesbian party in NYC on Wednesday, and this is news. [Page Six]
• The woman suing Morgan Freeman for flipping her car will have her day in court next year. [USA Today]
• This report claims that Patrick Swayze's fuller face and full head of hair prove that his battle with cancer is going well, even though he is still smoking. [NY Daily News]
• Congrats to SNL's Bill Hader, who will be a dad; his wife is pregnant. [People]
• Aerosmith concerts are postponed while Steven Tyler recovers from falling off of the stage. [USA Today]
• "I had to turn him down. I really hated the idea of Channing Tatum. I told di Bonaventura that this is not the guy to play one of the most feared killers of the 20th Century. I think Mickey Rourke would really be good. He's got that sense of danger, and there's a similarity between the two. But it's not Channing Tatum." — Phil Carlo, who wrote The Ice Man: Confessions of a Mafia Contract Killer. [Page Six]
• "To me, the idea of being an actor and being stuck in Los Angeles — a city that's totally based on one job — is so uninspiring. New York completely fulfills every need I have on a daily basis. I'm madly in love with this city." — Josh Lucas. [Page Six]
• "Resident Evil started out as this fun project. I went in for it as a joke. 'Sure, I'll go make an action movie,' I thought, 'This'll be cool, because my brother loves the video game so much.' It's turned into a steady job. See? [making a fist] The knuckles? They're all cut up. They used to be really soft, but they can't use them any more [in L'Oreal ads]. They use someone else's." — Milla Jovovich. [Guardian]
• "My mom [Bebe Buell] and gran were models and took such good care of their skin I couldn't help but learn. My dad is also full of great beauty advice, like wear your perfume in your belly button and on the soles of your feet so it becomes part of you." — Liv Tyler, to Elle. [Daily Express]
• "I'm always shocked that there's an interesting, full-fledged, ambitiously wrought role for somebody like me, that somebody's willing to put in a movie, it's unusual, that's what I mean by shocked. I'm not shocked because … 'Gosh, me? How do I know how to act?' [Laughs] But there's so many unbelievably talented, richly talented women and men that are older, that just don't get a chance." — Meryl Streep. [Salon]
• "I have this phobia of becoming someone's 'girlfriend.' I have guy friends who have been dating a girl for six months and our other friends don't know her name. They just ask, 'Hey, where's your girlfriend?' And I want to scream, 'OK, her name is Sally, and she's awesome, and you've known her for months. Where did her identity go?'" — Charlene Yi. [The Daily Beast]

• Oprah is being sued for $1 trillion. That is one trillion dollars. Here's the deal:

Author Damon Lloyd Goffe of the Bronx claims that in April 2008, Oprah confessed to seizing (?) and publishing (on the web) a first draft of his work, A Tome of Poetry, under the title Pieces Of My Soul. [National Enquirer]

• Newly unemployed Paula Abdul might go to The View: The show's rep says "She was always welcome on the program in the past and always will be in the future." Paula might fill in during Elisabeth Hasselbeck's maternity leave, but probably won't be offered a full-time job; the rep says: "We aren't hiring, of course." [E!]
• Apparently Paula's Idol resignation Tweet took many Idol staffers by surprise. When asked if Paula will be replaced, one exec said: "I have no idea." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Former American Idol producer Nigel Lythgoe says he's talked with Paula about coming to Fox's So You Think You Can Dance. "With Paula's background as a dancer, choreographer and reality judge now, I don't know anyone more qualified than Paula Abdul." [NY Daily News]
• "Who can replace Paula Abdul on 'American Idol?' Sarah Palin? Judge Judy?" LOL. [NY Daily News]
• You know who will be on American Idol? Victoria Beckham. Yes, Posh Spice will make a guest appearance on the judging panel. Zigazig-ah. [Daily Mail]
• Posh's appearance will be a one-off. [People]
• Britney wants to marry her manager-boyfriend Jason Trawick and have his baby (she wants a girl), but a source says: "Jason's last long-term relationship ended because he wouldn't pop the question." As always, consider the source on this. [MSNBC via National Enquirer]
• Kristin Davis is caught in the middle of Mideast politics — she is no longer a spokeswoman for human rights/relief organization Oxfam International because she endorses the Ahava cosmetics line, which is made by Dead Sea Cosmetics in the Mitzhe Shalem Jewish settlement in the West Bank. Oxfam considers this "disputed" territory. [Page Six]
• A new batch of nude photographs of Vanessa Hudgens hit the internet and her lawyer confirms that they are real and that she was underage when they were taken. You've got to wonder who keeps leaking pictures of the Disney teen queen, and how he or she is getting access to these images. [Perez]
• According to this report, the Vanessa Hudgens pix are actually old. Yet! Released just in time: There's a red carpet premiere of her new flick, Bandslam, tomorrow. [E!]
• Mischa Barton didn't go to some castmate's birthday party and we're supposed to read something into that. [Page Six]
• Matt Damon, Don Cheadle and George Clooney are hanging out at Cloon's luxurious Lake Como estate, like an Ocean's Eleven reunion. Except no Brad Pitt. [NY Daily News]
• Aerosmith's Steven Tyler was airlifted to a hospital after falling off the stage during a show in South Dakota. Not a joke: He went down during the song "Love In An Elevator." His injuries are reportedly not too serious: minor head and neck injuries and a shoulder injury. [AP]
• In a poll by lovefilm.com (?), Anne Hathaway was named best actress under 30. Keira Knightley got second place. [Telegraph]
• It's tough to describe the creeptastic pictures in the results of this "NYC Prep Meets Yearbook Yourself" post, but there are retro hairstyles and Morrissey quotes, so you'd better just click and see. [The Faster Times]
• Michael Jackson and rapper Fabolous are on the top of the Billboard charts. [Reuters]
• A South Korean newspaper is suing Michael Jackson's estate for $7.9 million over some canceled concert dates in 1990. As if Katherine Jackson's lawyers didn't have enough to worry about. [AP]
• Katherine Jackson will be telling Prince and Paris that their biological mom is Debbie Rowe in the next few weeks. [NY Post]
• A play at the Edinburgh Fringe festival — with an all-Malawian cast — is about Madonna's adoption saga and titled Mercy Madonna of Malawi. Her Madgesty is played by a black male actor in a blonde wig, and he looks like he's loving it. [BBC News]
• If you haven't seen it yet, the animated Modest Mouse video directed by Heath Ledger can be found at the link. [NY Daily News]
• Barbra Streisand is auctioning off more than 400 personal items to benefit her charity: A baby grand piano, a dress from Funny Lady, some outfits from Meet The Fockers. "What good does it do in storage?" Barbra asks. The Streisand Foundation supports women's, children's, environmental and political causes. [AP]
• Catherine Deneuve was booed at a performance in Italy, where she was reading at a cultural festival. Attendees may have been frustrated that she was reading in French and there were no subtitles. [AP]
• Pedro Almodóvar turns 60 next month, and is about to release his 17th feature film, Broken Embraces. He says: "I want to make more. Right now, I feel a sense of urgency that I never had before to make films. I feel much more in a hurry now than when I was 20 or 30. Time passes." And! On muse Penelope Cruz: "Hollywood doesn't take such risks with actors. They're not that rich in female characters either. I have the advantage that I know Penelope very well as a friend. She has such faith in me, so I can take more risks, bring out those unseen Penelopes, that other directors wouldn't dare to try or conceive." Be sure and click the link and watch the trailer, in which Cruz wears a bunch of different wigs and channels Audrey Hepburn and Marilyn Monroe. [Telegraph]
• Liam Neeson will star in Unknown White Male, a thriller from the director of Orphan, in which Neeson will play a doctor who gets into a car accident and goes into a coma. When he wakes up, his wife doesn't recognize him — and she's living with another man who has assumed his identity. [Variety]
• HBO, which has been getting very lady-friendly lately, is developing a show for Laura Dern. The premise? A formerly self-destructive woman has a spiritual awakening and becomes determined to live an enlightened life, wreaking unintended consequences." Writer? Mike White, School Of Rock. [Women & Hollywood]
• Thomas Beatie, known as the "pregnant man," is pitching a reality series to Oxygen to TLC. [NY Daily News]
• Retrogossip: "Marilyn Monroe and Tony Curtis had affair while making 'Some Like it Hot,' Curtis reveals in book.… The 84-year-old actor writes that he and Monroe had an affair while making the movie in 1958 which left her pregnant. Had she not miscarried, Marilyn would have been his baby mama." [Gatecrasher]
• "He'd better start making some good films ... I'm not a great fan of Public Enemies, because I think [Michael Mann's] a fucking extraordinary filmmaker, but personally I didn't think Johnny had enough room to act ... He's making so much money. There was a piece in the Huffington Post today. It's a letter saying 'All right, come on, we all love you, but stop.' ... It's like, 'Come on. You've got the power to make some really good films happen. Why are you doing this shit?'" — Terry Gilliam on Johnny Depp. [NY Mag]
• "Chris Kattan wanting to be a leading man is a joke, and it's a great way to poke fun of myself. It's not so much about finding a gig but good, respectful gigs." — Chris Kattan, on his role in Bollywood Hero, in which he decides to head to India and reinvent himself as the star of a Bollywood epic, Peculiar Dancing Boy. [USA Today
• "My priorities have shifted completely, which has helped my career because there's this new peace that I have. If I never did anything again, I would be a mom and I'd be totally happy being a mom. Everything has fallen into place so beautifully because I'm not trying so hard. If my daughter's OK, I can concentrate on something else. So it's not like all day I'm thinking about me." — Milla Jovovich. [LA Times]
• "If this article comes out and we're not together, I'd still love [Tony]," she says. "And he'd still be a huge part of who I am today." — Jessica Simpson, to Glamour magazine. [NY Daily News]
• The thing is that American Idol obviously appeals to a massive audience, and they have everything from little teenagers that freak out and scream when they see me. Then there's the sort of weird kids that were a little bit different and alternative than everyone else and were getting into Idol, too. You have the single moms. You have the Oprah audience. You have the grandmothers. You have women that want a baby. Women that want to fuck you. Women that want you to fuck their daughter or people that want to make you cookies. So you have everything. But I'll tell you, I definitely have a pretty hard-core sort of middle-age woman following. It's awesome when anyone follows, but I think that if I had a new hit on the radio and I was playing shows, you'd see a lot more of the teeners there, but the women that are dedicated, that travel all over the country to see me, are from 30 to 50 and some older, definitely. You know that's all been really great and fun, but I'm very focused on the work and eventually settling down and finding one nice girl, preferably Greek." — Constantine Maroulis, former Idol contestant and current Broadway star in Rock Of Ages.[The Daily Beast]

• Just what you always wanted: Heidi Montag has posed for the September issue of Playboy:

Here is the obligatory quote about how classy it is: "There is nudity. It's tasteful – she had a lot of fun with it," says a source. [People]

• Wait, what? Rihanna and Chris Brown requested seats together at the NBA Finals game in Orlando, Florida. Some kind of carefully orchestrated show of support?!?!?! [ET]
• Oh, no: This report states that Rihanna and Chris Brown did not sit together. [Page Six]
• Madonna's adoption appeal: Approved. She's in the process of working out the details and getting Mercy to New York. [BBC News, Daily News, People]
• Kristin Davis says of the Sex And The City sequel: "I haven't read the actual script yet; we're supposed to get it this week." But she says some of the characters known for Manolos and martinis might be feeling the sting of the recession: "I don't think we are totally switching to a new shoe brand, but there are definitely some effects of the economic situation that will be felt, but I don't know if [the consequences will be felt] across the board or specific to certain characters." [WWD]
• Kanye West and Chanel Iman: Seen getting cozy. [Page Six]
• Kanye West is also into Lady GaGa: "I'm into her style. It's hot right now. I mean, I'm a guy - so obviously I'm into her." Guess what? they're going on tour together! [Daily News]
• Kanye West performed for 3,000 teens in his hometown of Chicago at an event for the Kanye West Foundation, a nonprofit working to decrease dropout rates and improve literacy. It was co-founded by Kanye's late mother, who worked in education for years. The kids who got to see Kanye were students who had improved their grades and attendance; Chicago has a 50% dropout rate. [MSNBC]
• Were the Usher divorce reports just a rumor? His wife doesn't seem to know anything about it ,and there's no record of him filing… yet. But also, his wife hasn't spoken to him "in a few days." [TMZ]
• According to this report, Usher hasn't filed for divorce yet, but a clerk with Cobb County Superior Court in Georgia says, "we had a telephone conversation last week with an attorney asking how to file for them." Why the divorce? One source rails: "Tameka is crazy. His mother didn't even go to their wedding because she didn't approve!" [Gatecrasher]
• BREAKING: Anne Hathaway upstaged by raccoon. [Page Six]
• Sonny Bono's widow — Congresswoman Mary Bono — says she "loves and supports Chaz" — meaning Chastity Bono, who is transitioning from female to male. [TMZ]
• Did Chastity Bono's rep want cash for her sex change story? [National Enquirer]
• Even though Kate Winslet said "it's very tempting to have a nanny and live in a gated community," her rep clarifies: "'She has a part-time nanny." [Daily Mail]
• Doug Reinhardt's rep released a statement about his relationship with Paris Hilton, which reads: "Doug refuses to take part of this ridiculous media circus. He wishes Paris and all of her future boyfriends the best of luck." All together now: Oh. Snap. [TMZ]
• Paris Has already moved on, to Madrid Real soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo, who is what is technically referred to as a serious hottie. [Page Six]
• This story about a late mortician accused of misusing burial funds is "notable" because the estranged wife of the man, J. Jeffrey Fretti, is named Tamara, and she is the sister of Katie Holmes. [Toledo Blade]
• When it comes to dating someone much older, Evan Rachel Wood, 21, who was with Marilyn Manson, 40, says: "I don't think it works. I think it's a bad idea. I think as long as you learn from it - good or bad experience - it's an experience, and you should take something away from it." Of the new Woody Allen film Whatever Works, Evan says: "I spoke to Larry [David] about it and told him if the relationship went any further sexually I wouldn't have done the movie... That's one of the things that I liked about the relationship in the movie; it never crosses that line or gets creepy." [Daily Express]
• Wow. According to this article, "Before [Jada Pinkett Smith's new show] Hawthorne and HBO's The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency debuted a few months ago (starring Jill Scott), it had been 35 years since an African-American woman was the lead in a TV drama." [Newsweek]
• Even though Carrie Prejean has been telling everyone she and her new boobs were offered Playboy, insiders say there was never an offer on the table. Hmm. [Extra]
• A "select band of Los Angeles wordsmiths," Lab Twenty6, has refused to let Peaches Geldof join their discussion group. [The Sun]
• Joy Behar rarely leaves her neighborhood. So what? [NY Mag]
• Eva Mendes got all verklempt while discussing her work with The Art of Elysium, an organization that encourages working actors, artists and musicians to voluntarily dedicate their time and talents to children battling serious medical conditions. Thank God for waterproof mascara," she sniffed. [WWD]
• Katie "Jordan" Price bought a horse, which this paper claims "will ease the pain of her split with hubby Peter Andre." [The Sun]
• Weird: Someone is trying to form a group called New Kids On The Block. So the real New Kids On The Block are suing. [TMZ]
• Singer Nivea Hamilton and model Lauren London are both pregnant by rapper Lil Wayne. For some reason we thought he reproduced when you spilled water on him? [Perez]
• Amy Poehler will star in Lunch Lady, a flick based on a children's graphic novel series — titles include Lunch Lady and the League of Librarians and Lunch Lady and the Cyborg Substitute, both of which are due this summer. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Matt Damon might play Lance Armstrong in a biopic. Do we approve? [Mirror]
• "DJ Jazzy Jeff says his weekend performance in Kansas City was stopped because of censorship, not race." [AP]
• Blind item! "Which very married actor had a flirtatious folly with a gay hairdresser?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Those are two very different communities, but something they both share is love of celebration. My relationship with the gay community is long-standing and loyal, and I love them very much. I consider my music to be very gay, and I love that it is gay." — Lady GaGa on being embraced by the gay and hip-hop "communities." [USA Today]
• "She's just a great, crazy character who is psychologically complex, a textbook sociopath. But she's charming and seemingly sweet, even when she does really bad things. Who wouldn't want to play a character like that?" — Gina Gershon, on playing socialite Pat Allanson in the Lifetime mobie Everything She Ever Wanted. [USA Today]
• "[I] will sometimes hold off on the insulin, which will jack my blood sugar level up to the low 200 range. It's like how a prizefighter will want to go into the ring with his blood sugar levels high. It gives you the stamina of a bull. So, yes, sometimes I will endanger my own life to pleasure a woman." — Bret Michaels. [Perez]
• "Music is about listening not looking. That's why I wore these huge baggy dresses on stage with The Cranberries… I basically had the wrong kind of love and attention around me. I lived six years in a bus with strangers, touring the world with the band, seeing the insides of hotels. I lost touch with my friends. I was lonely all that time. I went nuts I was so lonely. These were days before mobile phones so I had to find a phonebox just to talk to my parents. I lost a lot of my youth." — from a worthwhile interview with Dolores O'Riordan. [Independent]
• Yeah, we played [brother and sister], but at least we're not related in real life! Good God! I thought it would be creepy for him, but it's not." — Evan Rachel Wood on dating former Once and Again costar Shane West. [NY Daily News]
• "Being nice and adorable isn't funny. I enjoyed being a bitch. Everyone does. They are always better written and it's a relief… Then they said, 'Here's this woman director we like, Anne Fletcher. Can she come and meet you?' I met her and within five minutes, she said the word 'vagina,' and I'm like (her voice rising giddily), 'I love her.' " — Sandra Bullock, on why she wanted to do The Proposal. [USA Today]
• "I may never hear that word 'mom.' But being a parent is not about breeding. It's about caring. And it's easy to say, but it's harder to do. When you don't have that title, you flounder and it hurts. But this is the best test of being a parent. And I just have to keep reminding myself I don't care what I get. I care what I give." — Sandra Bullock, on being a stepmom. [USA Today]
• "I get more naked this season than I did last season. We have a really great crew and everyone's really respectful. It's not an issue for me… [But] I work my ass off. I'm very careful about what I eat, and I work out a lot. My costume entails bathing suits, short-shorts and nude scenes, come on! I don't want to be perpetuating the myth that women actually do look exactly like the way they look in magazines and on television through absolutely no effort!" — Anna Paquin on True Blood. [E!]

• Oh, snap: Paulina Porizkova has been given the pink slip by Tyra and America's Next Top Model! The '80s supermodel told Craig Ferguson on the Late, Late Show:

"Listen, do you know why I am in Los Angeles? Because I am looking for a job. Because I was fired by America's Next Top Model on my birthday." (PP's birthday was April 9.) She continued: "The reason I was told I was fired was because, it seemed, that America's Next Top Model has gotten too fat and they needed to cut some fat and the fat was me. So I figured it was either that or my gigantic huge ego. Which I wasn't aware of until I was told by the producers that I have an ego problem." Will Twiggy come back? Or will the show just have Ms. J, Nigel and Tyra as judges? [E!]

• Did George Clooney get smashed and puke at a party in Miami? A snitch says "He was drinking vodka and Patron, but it looked like he'd had enough," then he hurled in the VIP area. George says: "That never happened, although I was sitting next to someone who did throw up." Right, right. [Gatecrasher]
• Did Brad Pitt get wasted and drunk dial Jennier Aniston? A source says he called and told her he misses her and that he's sorry for any hurt caused." Right, right. [Gatecrasher]
• Someone tried to break into Lindsay Lohan's house yesterday. Cops thought maybe the house was ransacked, but, no, it was just messy. Who among us has not had a bedroom that looked like it was hit by burglars? I have been there. [TMZ]
• Whoops: Rihanna accidentally sent Chris Brown birthday presents! "One of Rihanna's assistants accidentally gave him an expensive pair of sneakers and a watch that Rihanna had bought before they broke up," a source tells Us Weekly. "She no longer wanted to send them." [MSNBC]
• Kate Winslet wears a ring given to her by Leonardo DiCaprio, and it's engraved inside. But she won't reveal what the text reads. One guess: "I'm cold, Rose." [Mirror]
• More on this in Midweek Madness, but Kate from Jon & Kate Plus 8 maybe "drew up a secret contract that allows Jon to have girlfriends on the side - as long as he stays on the show." [Star]
• Former Idol runner-up Clay Aiken has reached out to Adam Lambert, but apparently the Idol producers don't want Gayken anywhere near Glambert. [Chicago Sun-Times]
• Britney Spears' cousin and former assistant Alli Sims has a new single on iTunes, which she alerted her entire phone book about via text message. [Page Six]
• Since what every woman lives for is to be validated by men, Olivia Wilde must be thrilled that she is number one on the Maxim Hot 100 list. [USA Today]
• Wow! Jennifer Hudson looks gorgeous on the new cover of Essence. LOL at the number one sex secret: "Make Him Say Your Name." People! That is a Beyoncé song. [The Life files]
• Michael Jackson could take home more than $50 million from his 50-show stint at London's O2 Arena. [Reuters]
• Michael Jackson's tour is "shrouded in secrecy." A source says "here are some big things that will happen and amaze." [MSNBC]
• Nicole Kidman was supposed to star in a Woody Allen film with Josh Brolin and Naomi Watts, but has "bolted" from the project. [Variety]
• As seen in this 2008 video, Carrie Prejean was a lingerie model for E! [E!]
• Mark Ronson names his "essentials": Lagavulin whiskey; Duran Duran; the Sunday New York Times. Among others. [Men.Style.Com]
• Justin Timberlake's family adores Jessica Biel. [Page Six]
• A 50 Cent/Bette Midler duet would be epic. Amazing! In the meantime, you'll have to make do knowing that they garden together. Sorta. [E!]
• Drop everything and shed a single glistening tear: Chad Michael Murray is leaving One Tree Hill. Ditto Hilarie Burton. [E!]
• This Daily Fail story is about how Leona Lewis is lonely, homesick and gaining weight; based on a few photos. Charming. [Daily Mail]
• Depeche Mode's lead singer, Dave Gahan, is in the hospital in Athens, Greece for an undisclosed illness. Insert "Shake The Disease" or "Just Can't Get Enough" or "Personal Jesus" joke here. [Yahoo News via AP]
• Katie "Jordan" Price and Peter Andre constantly sniped at each other and she called him her "punch bag," so maybe it's best that they have split. [The Sun]
• This report claims that Katie "Jordan" Price was training for a marathon (?!?!) and refusing to fornicate, which is why "sex-starved" hubs Peter Andre wanted out. [The Sun]
• I called this, but here it is: "Katie Price's mystery man is gay equestrian star." [News.com.au]
• Kylie Minogue and her hot hottie boyfriend went to a photobooth where they acted "like a pair of lovestruck teenagers." Whee! [Daily Mail]
• Kid Rock is making an alcohol product called Bad Ass Beer. "It just tastes like good American light beer…an everyday beer," he says. "It's creating jobs in Michigan at the brewing company. We know people are hurting here so we're trying to take that whole approach." [LA Times]
• New day, same story: Trudie Styler, Rainforest Foundation founder, hired a private jet for the White House Correspondents' Dinner. Won't someone think of the epiphytes?!?!?! [Daily Mail]
• Anna Kournikova had so many demands related to a recent speaking engagement — chauffeur, first class plane tickets — that she is being called Costly Kournikova. [Daily Mail]
• This guy who "contributed script ideas" to Guy Ritchie's flick, RocknRolla, is on the "most wanted" list in London; he was involved in a demonstration against Israel's presence in Gaza and his Facebook (?!?!) states, "Muslim first before anything. And InshAllah I will die one…" [The Sun]
• Three words: Goonies cast reunion. [USA Today]
• Blind item! "Which self-branded wanna-be celeb was caught doing the walk of shame at11 a.m. - in her ball gown - after a recent gala in D.C.? [Gatecrasher]
• "It's very exciting and very different than the first one, which is the luxury of getting to do another one. We did the first one, and those were our pent-up things that we hadn't finished in the show, so now we're just starting fresh in a way, which is really, really exciting. It's just a new adventure." — Kristin Davis, on the Sex And The City sequel. [Mirror]
• "I've changed the destination of my wedding seven times." — Rachel Hunter. [Page Six]
• "Somebody told me these people are using it. I hate politics. I just want people to serve the people. I want governments, whichever government comes in, to be unbiased and say there should be justice in the country and that's my purpose in life." — Composer AR Rahman, who is upset that Indian political campaigns are using the song "Jai Hao." [Times Of India]
• "This is what I told the guys: The plan was I wanted to do the dance record, go on the tour, come home and get pregnant — since I'm a pro at it now because I did it before. I'll write the record while I'm pregnant, then after I have the baby, we'll go on tour and we'll have a new No Doubt record. It'll be amazing… It totally didn't work. I don't know how other women feel, but I lose connection with myself because my body becomes this other vessel for this other human, even after a few months, you don't have your body back, you're not yourself. I was feeling not very modern, not very creative." — Gwen Stefani, on working with No Doubt. [LA Times]
• "Lindsay is a good person to have watch over Ali right now. Lindsay can show Ali the ropes. Ali's out there working on her record and singing career." — Dina Lohan. [MSNBC]
• "I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING TWITTER... WHY WOULD I USE TWITTER??? I ONLY BLOG 5 PERCENT OF WHAT I'M UP TO IN THE FIRST PLACE. I'M ACTUALLY SLOW DELIVERING CONTENT BECAUSE I'M TOO BUSY ACTUALLY BUSY BEING CREATIVE MOST OF THE TIME AND IF I'M NOT AND I'M JUST LAYING ON A BEACH I WOULDN'T TELL THE WORLD. EVERYTHING THAT TWITTER OFFERS I NEED LESS OF. THE PEOPLE AT TWITTER KNOW I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING TWITTER SO FOR THEM TO ALLOW SOMEONE TO POSE AS ME AND ACCUMULATE OVER A MILLION NAMES IS IRRESPONSIBLE AND DECEITFUL TO THERE FAITHFUL USERS. REPEAT... THE HEADS OF TWITTER KNEW I DIDN'T HAVE A TWITTER AND THEY HAVE TO KNOW WHICH ACCOUNTS HAVE HIGH ACTIVITY ON THEM. IT'S A FUCKING FARCE AND IT MAKES ME QUESTION WHAT OTHER SO CALLED CELEBRITY TWITTERS ARE ACTUALLY REAL OR FAKE. HEY TWITTER, TAKE THE SO CALLED KANYE WEST TWITTER DOWN NOW .... WHY? ... BECAUSE MY CAPS LOCK KEY IS LOUD!!!!!!!!!" — Your friend, Kanye West. [DListed]

[Brentwood, CA, October 5. Image via Splash.]

• Poor Posh. After the embarrassingly poor sales of her denim line and ensuing abandonment by retailers, we hear that her men's dVb line has been pushed back "until next year" by L.A. boutique Kitson. Plucky Posh is undaunted, having spoken of her desire to launch a couture line and show at New York's fashion week. dVb denies the line is floundering, claiming that "it is currently being manufactured but is likely to reach stores later than anticipated." [This Is London]
• A man has confessed to the murder of Canadian model Diana O'Brien, whose body was found last week in Shanghai, where the 20-year-old was on a 3-month modeling contract. 18-year-old Chen Jun was arrested Friday morning in Anhui province; he apparently killed the model during an armed robbery of her apartment. [CNN]
• Gwyneth Paltrow is really slacking in her obligations to Estee Lauder's new "Sensous" perfume, refusing to show for any of the hundred ridiculous promos the company's set up (opening the stock market, anyone?) and leaving the burden on the slender shoulders of co-pitchwomen Hilary Rhoda, Carolyn Murphy, and Elizabeth Hurley. Recriminations all around. [New York Magazine]

• Seems the Nuclear Wintour has thawed for Obama: the fashionista was on the newly-published list of "major donors" to the Dem's campaign, indicating that she's raised fifty grand or more. [Neew York Times]
• Wait, fashion, and bloggers...petty? Hard to believe, but it would seem that style sites Fashion Indie and Coutorture are engaged in the most ridiculous war of words (and pictures) ever. Says The Pipeline, "in our years of reading and writing for fashion blogs, this is as mad a skirmish as we've ever seen." [Pipeline]
• The CEO of Overstock.com, that online retailer with all the insinuating "Big O" commercials, has decided not to sell fur through his sites. “You don’t have to think about it very much before you realize … you’re completely objectifying an animal when you say I’m going to wear it as a decorative object. That’s over the line for anyone who gives it any thought, I would think,' said Patrick Byrne, who's made waves in the past for his "battles against hedge funds." [Reuters]
• Are low necklines responsible for Marks and Spencer's market slump? Some suggest that the chain's base of older folks has been alienated by attempts to appeal to a more youthful demographic. "The clothes are not suitable for our age group,' says one older lady. "The dresses are too low on top and they don't have sleeves. They just show too much cleavage and at our age we can't wear that sort of style."' [Independent]
• Charity "Clothes Off Our Backs" latest fundraiser is selling off Rodo shoes. The twist/catch? Celebs like Kate Beckinsale, Cate Blanchett, Sheryl Crow, Kirsten Dunst, Zooey Deschanel and America Ferrera have each decorated a pair "as they chose." Apparently not everyone finds these words ominous: Pink's pair has already racked up $400 in bids; the heels Kristin Davis decorated have scored a more modest $170. [EOnline]
• Next up for Target GO!: Purses by Monica Botkier, coming up next week, and a jewelry line by Dean Harris on 8/17. We've not had great luck with the designer accessories lines in the past, but hope springs eternal in the breast of Recessionistas. [The Budget Fashionista]
• "Black is best when you're in court/The judge will be impressed!" That's Singin' In The Rain. This isThe Daily News on Christie Brinkley's courtroom choices :"The media-savvy former model - who's tried hard on the stand to argue she has been a perfect wife and mother - has picked crisp button-down shirts smoothed into sharp pencil skirts for her divorce trial against estranged husband Cook. Call it the Serious Woman's Uniform - and a smart wardrobe choice when you're up for a fight. "It's not threatening, that's the bottom line," says fashion commentator Mary Alice Stephenson. "The pencil skirt is a piece of clothing that all women respond to."" [Daily News]
• New York consumer confidence at all-time low. [Crain's]
• Super-scrawny menswear designer Hedi Slimane will be the cover model for the debut of Vogue Homme Japan. Said Kazuhiro Saito, editor in chief of Vogue Nippon and the new men's spin-off of Slimane's aesthetic, '"There were those very skinny, boyish male models. That works for Japanese guys."' [WWD]
• The public asks Tim Gunn ten really asinine questions like, "What movie or TV cast has had the biggest impact on fashion?" He makes it work. [Time]

[Israel, June 16. Image via Splash.]

According to Kristin Davis, the director's instructions were to "think that's so sexy."

And I said, "No, listen, man, I've been playing Charlotte for awhile, and she would not think that's sexy. You have to trust me."

Oh good grief. Anyway, that's about all I gleaned from this story, except that the liquefy filter hasn't gone out of style and yes I'm talking to whoever touched up Miranda:

Here's the whole spread:

Also, Marie Claire shot four separate covers for this issue: bet you can't guess which one I found at my local newsstand! But as a consolation prize for those who can't be bothered to collect them all they give you four cover-like pages anyway, which brings me to:

I'm sorry, what the fuck does that even mean? Oh, whatever.

10:17am: I am stuck in traffic behind a broken down bus! This cabbie is an asshole. I might have to get out and run. [Ed note: The movie is supposed to start at 10:15]

10:37: Two cabs and one subway trip later. I'm finally here! It took me an hour to travel maybe three miles. I already hate this movie.

10:40: These are the shoes I chose to wear. Thank friggin god I didn't wear heels as a joke.

10:41: Big just proposed to Carrie. Kinda.
10:45: This theater is packed and everyone is laughing at the stupid jokes. Although Samantha told Carrie she should get Botox.

10:48: Carrie still has that stupid pink crystal-y phone. Except it's taped together which is a nice touch. She just asked Samantha to be her maid of honor.

10:49: All Charlotte does is scream.

10:50: LOL! Carrie's boss talked her into doing the bride at 40 piece by saying "Vogue airbrushing".

10:52: The wedding photo shoot scene. The Dior dress looks like frothy diarrhea. Vivienne Westwood personally sent Carrie a dress for free.

10:55: Haha. Carrie is becoming far-sighted but won't get glasses. Also Chris Noth: Fake tan much?
10:56: Carrie does research for her new book (about love) at the library.

10:59: Carrie won't tell her friends how often she and Big fuck!

11:02: Also, she calls him "John" now.

11:03: OMG, Big built Carrie a closet just like Mariah Carey's. It looks like a store.

11:04: Charlotte just screamed again. And again.

11:05: I'm cringing. They are trying on outfits to "Walk This Way".

11:07: The Miranda/Steve storyline is actually really good. He just admitted to cheating on her and the old lady in the wheelchair behind me just yelled "Hit him! Hit him!" I'm gonna try to get a picture of her.

11:14: Miranda is like a total bitch.

11:24: Big just jilted her! Because she wouldn't answer the phone in the morning. Seriously, all these people are such babies! who wants to put up with this bullshit? Now Charlotte is screaming at Big. Kristin Davis' throat must've been so sore.

11:28: "Okay so he didn't really jilt her. He freaked for a second, then turned around and went back but Carrie was already embarrassed and then she hit him. The whole thing could've been avoided. Kind of like this movie!

11:31: The reason why the honeymoon was in Mexico is because Carrie paid for it as a surprise.

11:32: Carrie is now in a deep depression in Mexico She's been sleeping and not eating. Speaking of, I'm gonna step out to the concession stand for some breakfast.

11:34: Hahahaha! They actually showed Miranda's thick bush.

11:43: Breakfast!

11:44: Somehow Carrie got her apartment back. I missed that when I was buying my breakfast.

11:47: I guess I also missed the part about how Carrie can afford Jennifer Hudson.

11:50: It really pisses me off that Carrie isn't computer literate. Her assistant does her email for her while she flips through magazines on her couch.

11:55: Carrie died her hair dark brown and changed her phone number and is complaining about having a different area code. [The Lifestyles Of The Rich And First World! -Ed.]

11:57: Samantha adopted a dog because its a girl who loves to hump and she felt a connection.

11:58: Jennifer Hudson deserves a Razzie for this. She sucks.

12:00 Oh! I forgot to mention that Charlotte shit her pants in Mexico. Literally.

12:02: Carrie bought her assistant a Louis Vuitton bag for Christmas. Carrie is a retard.

12:08: Okay, finally a Carrie outfit I like. Pajamas, boots, fur coat, stupid hat. That's what I call "walking the dog" attire.

12:10: This sad people on New Year's Eve montage is way too long.

12:16: Carrie finally realized that she is a self-obsessed narcissist! And that she uses "I" too much.

12:29: One therapy session and Miranda and Steve are back together. Also, Miranda is the only one to show her tits.

12:32: Samantha has gained like 5 lbs and everyone noticed. What bitches.

12:33: Samantha and Smith just had the most civilized breakup after 5 years.

12:35: I just checked carriebradshaw.com and she wrote a book called MENhattan? Barf.
12:37: Also, Charlotte's little girls are named Lily and Rose. Barf x2.
12:41: Interesting. Carrie always wears a bra to bed, but in this frantic city scene she is running through the streets without one.
12:46: People are actually crying in this theater because Big proposed a second time with a Manolo!

12:51: Last line: "And there they were, four friends who had met as girls and were now women ready to enter the next phase of their lives, dressed head to toe in love. And that's one label that never goes out of style." LOL.

This is the violent wheelchair lady.

This is the next showing lining up. So many mothers and daughters.

Yeah, I'm sure they share their sexual liberation together.

12:59: As I was walking out of the theater a middle aged woman working there asked me if the movie was any good and I made the "so-so" sign with my hand and then she goes, "Yeah, I figured. I never liked that show. I'm a Will & Grace fan myself."

The Good
Kristin Davis shone like a fancy piece of Hanukkah gelt.
Anna Wintour looks like my mom, which is awesome for my mom but...well, I guess it's awesome for Anna too.
Lorraine Bracco, aka the former Dr. Melfi, has a PhD in cute shoes.
The only thing missing from Cynthia Nixon's ensemble is her cute, ginger girlfriend.
I think Lydia Hearst looks great in what is probably Heatherette, although she didn't need the hippie necklace.
Oh Idina! You look lovely. Mazel Tov.
Perry Farrell looks like a God, as usual, and his lady-friend looks like a window display at Agent Provocateur. (Yes, that's good. We want more of that).
Amy Sedaris is a genius, and her outfit has a perfectly spring-appropriate color palette.
Check and mate! You done good SJP.

The Bad
Eli Manning? Don't mind if I do! But who's the lady in the confusing-print dress?
Kim Catrall's dress looks like it's doused in dollar bills.
I love that Lil Kim was there, but I don't love that she's wearing what looks like second-hand H&M.
I don't care for this dress on Michelle Williams. It's too, "Call Tina Knowles and get me something from the House of Dereon to wear to the Sex In The City premiere!"

The Ugly
Even Miss Piggy was there! (Joke, it's Nicole Forrester, who probably doesn't even know who Miss Piggy is).
Tranny? It's Tranny. It's Solid Gold Ferocia Tranny. It's Studio 54 via Project Runway Tranny. Tranny. (Sorry, that joke will never get old for me. Thanks, Amy Poehler).

[Images via Getty]

Despite all of Charlotte's Cosmo-swilling, Kristin Davis is sober, and has been since before her stint on Sex and the City. "I’m a recovering alcoholic. I’ve never hid it, but I’ve been sober the whole time I’ve been famous, so it wasn’t like I had to go to rehab publicly," Davis told Health magazine. • Audrina and Justin Bobby are maybe back together. "If things get hard I always go back to Justin," Aud tells Us. The Hills are alive with the sound of boredom. • Britney Spears is allegedly in talks to perform at the Palms Casino in Vegas for a tidy sum. Hey, Celine Dion did it! [Celebitchy,Us, Dlisted]

The Good:
Cynthia Nixon: Simple, gorgeous, sleek, refined, sophisticated. When you don't have a huge rack you can pull this kind of thing off without looking trashy. Plus, the long column works with her body and she looks lean and tall. Kudos!

Kristin Davis looks cute, flirty and special without being overdone. The harsh flash is not doing the dress justice here; it has ruffle details at the hem.

Vivienne Westwood is 67 and fabulous. Do your thing girl!

This cut and color makes Martine McCutcheon look like a shapely goddess.

Love the vibrant sapphire blue on Kelly Rowland!

Sheree Murphy's little black dress makes a big impact.

Nineteen year old Daisy Lowe has legs for miles and is young enough to play with the short skirt/long jacket proportion.

This is quirky done right. I don't know who Portia Freeman is, but I love a woman who takes a chance and succeeds.

Adore the hue of Trinny Woodall's dress!

Paul O'Grady is a well-dressed cock in the henhouse.

The Bad:

Here is Sarah Jessica Parker and the infamous hat. Everyone is talking about this hat. The dress is adorable and the hat is kind of cool but together, eh, something is just off. It's quirky for quirky's sake and not fab or glam enough. In my opinon.

I don't "get" Kim Cattrall's dress. It's weirdly stiff below the waist. She has looked better.

I love Patricia Field, but this ensemble is a mess.

Tess Daly is late for her Ancient Roman stripper audition.

Adele is a singer with a gorgeous voice but apparently no evening gown. Seriously, though, check out her music. Amazing.

Roisin Murphy: From head to toe, it's like Picasso and Dr. Seuss had a paint fight.

I just don't think that Louise Redknapp is doing her body any favors with this dress.

Fiona Bruce's gown seems dated and amateur-ish.

Georgia May Jagger needs to get her hair out of her face and put on something more fitting for a 16-year-old.

I just do not like Lisa Snowdon's skirt. Sue me. (The shoes are glorious!)

Jaquetta Wheeler didn't even really try.

The Ugly:

Alex Curran looks as cheap and bright as a Florida motel.

Kim Stewart's pose, dress and attendance at this event are mind-boggling.

[Images via Getty and FilmMagic.]

• "It's out of control. There's always a different boy and everyone is worried he's going to pull a Halston." That's an anonymous friend of Marc Jacobs on the increasingly-erratic fashion designer. [Page Six]
  
• Ouch: David Lauren was not invited to his girlfriend (of three years) Lauren Bush's cousin Jenna's wedding. You know, Jenna Bush: Daughter of the POTUS. Apparently the Bush clan think David is too old for Lauren. Oh, and also too Jewish? Awkward. [Rush & Molloy]
  
• Kristin Davis is pissed about the injustices she faced making the Sex and the City movie: "It's in the contract that we get to keep our outfits, which is a fantastic thing, except that, for me, all of my outfits were samples. I kept my running pants, which I love and wear them a lot, but I was like, Where are my clothes?" [E!]

• Blondes need not apply to model for the lookbook for Lindsay Lohan's new leggings line. [Perez Hilton]
• God is dead: Perez Hilton is getting his own clothing line. For Hot Topic. [Celebitchy]
• The New York Giants' Super Bowl Championship ring was designed by their defensive end Michael Strahan, who told jewelers at Tiffany's he wanted a "Ten-table ring": "When I walk into a restaurant, I want you to be able to see it from 10 tables away." Um, thanks but no. [WWD, 1st item]
• And what does Giorgio Armani think about paying the most in taxes in all of Italy? "I was on a beach when I heard that. I'm not concerned with it." [NYDaily News]
• Cindy Crawford: Regrets, she has some: ""I regret that I wasn't wilder," she says. "I was working and I was nervous. I was the one in the corner with the book, being responsible. I can be wild now. I'll sometimes dance on a table for my husband and his friends. But not naked - those days are gone." [Vogue UK]
• China's latest offense: The exportation of fake Nikes. [LATimes]
• Harper's Bazaar editor-in-chief Glenda Bailey says that her permanent plus one Steven Sumner says she was only awarded with an Officer of the British Empire award because, "I shop for Britain. He thinks OBE stands for 'Owns Bloody Everything.'" [WWD, 4th item]
• It's so hard to be Diane Kruger. Of the goings-on after the Met Costume Institute Gala, she says, "I went to that party at Phillipe, which was way too overcrowded, so I headed down to Bungalow, where I danced with Christian Louboutin. That was fun!" [Fashion Week Daily]
• Eva Mendes: Pics of her topless in Italian Vogue here. [Egotastic]
• Donatella Versace is still trying to tell anyone who will listen that her girl Hillary Clinton should wear a dress. [Page Six]
• Karl Lagerfeld's handbag and luggage line is inspired by...Karl Lagerfeld. [Vogue UK]
• Fergie's daughter Princess Beatrice is working at Selfridge's department store during her gap year between high school and uni. How pleb of her. [Telegraph]
• Hermes: Sales up 13.4%. Good for them? [WWD, sub req'd]

The Bad:
The feathers! The gloves! Serena would not approve, Blake Lively.
Yes, the dress is nice enough. But I just can't take seeing Beyonce in one more "Beyonce" dress. Does the girl know no other silhouettes?!
Why must you hurt your boobies and toes, Eva Amurri???
Too much and not in a good way, Longoria.
Apologies to Eva Mendes but I just hate that color.
I think Gisele looks a little more trashy than classy.
Could Ivanka Trump wear anything more boring? Make an effort, lady.
I want to love Jennifer Connolly's dress. But I can't.
Ack! Leaping diagonal tiers, Jennifer Lopez!
Kristin Davis is all washed out.
Liv Tyler is wearing a lurex garbage bag toga.
Why does Mary J. Blige look sorta rumpled?
I love classic black dresses, but Sarah Michelle Gellar is wearing the wrong look for this occasion.
Sarah Silverman looks like a cracked-out Amy Winehouse. Oh. Wait. Nevermind.
Thandie Newton would look great if only she ditched the duster.
Dylan Lauren is rocking the Del Boca Vista aesthetic.
Something about this dress makes Julia Roberts look matronly.
I don't know who Alice Braga is, but her dress is a little mother-of-the-bride.
Too much pink, Lara Spencer.
Piper Perabo? Or a lost little alien?
Tamara Mellon looks a little Vegas, if ya know what I mean.
I don't want to see Donna Karan's side-boob ever again.
Is Helena Christensen wearing some suburban teen's prom dress?
Good effort, Kate Bosworth, but... no.

[Images via Getty.]