I don't know about you, but when I purchase something, I like to feel confident it's what I've been promised. For instance: If I am acquiring a coat trimmed with "faux fur," I prefer that the fur actually be faux, as opposed to something called a "raccoon dog."

When JC Penney hired noted gay lesbian homosexual Ellen Degeneres as its spokesperson, a homophobic group called One Million Moms fired back by calling for a massive boycott of the department store chain. Rather than dismiss Degeneres, JCP doubled down and featured in the pages of its May catalog a couple of happy…

Zooey Deschanel's breach-of-contract lawsuit against Steve Madden — who agreed, and then reneged, on a deal to produce a line tentatively called "Zooey's Shoes And Accessories" — reveals some details of how the celebrity-clothing-line sausage gets made. And paid for.

• Lady Gaga's meat dress was named the top fashion moment of 2010 by the sartorial sages at Time, closely followed by M.I.A.'s burqa, and Venus Williams' lingerie-inspired French Open get-up. Let's discuss. [Time]

• Blake Lively is rumored to be the face of an upcoming Chanel handbag campaign. [E!]
• Having Linda Evangelista in its ads has apparently driven up Talbot's quarterly profits by 17%. [WWD]

• Angelina Jolie is shilling fine jewelry again, with former Asprey executive Robert Procop. This black necklace she wore to a Salt premiere is one of their pieces. The jewels will be "priced individually," with proceeds going to Jolie's charity. [WWD]

• One of the perks of having an international supermodel for a girlfriend must be that you get to cast her in ads for your funny Moscow apartment development. Naomi Campbell's performance here seems more dutiful than inspired, however. [Copyranter]

• Krazy Kaiser Karl, on Kate Middleton and Prince William: "For the royals, apparently the royal blood is not in demand any longer." But no matter, because Middleton is "beautiful and elegant," and "chic in a way the position needs." [WWD]

• American Apparel's stock is tumbling this morning, following news that the company's dodgy accounting has caught the eye of the U.S. Attorney's office. It's currently trading at 0.83. [AMEX:APP]
• Dov says: "The capital structure issues will work themselves out." [WWD]

• Kate Hudson is the new face of Almay. Take that, Cam! [WWD]
• Big news. Two cup sizes, to be exact: that's what a new super-wonderbra promises to deliver. Says a Marks & Spencer lingerie designer, "Our bra is revolutionary." [DailyMail]

• Tilda, on her fragrance: "My son tells me it smells like Christmas." [WWD]
• "I like to look at paintings mainly, like those of Francis Bacon. Or Mapplethorpe, Newton, and Penn," says noted hottie/photographer Victor Demarchelier, son of Patrick. [Style.com]

Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland isn't even released until tomorrow, but you can already dress in, adorn yourself with, carry, make yourself up with, loll around in bed wearing, and get your nails did with products tied to the movie.

• Alexander McQueen's funeral took place today in London. His father Ronald, Daphne Guinness, Naomi Campbell, Lady Gaga, and Kate Moss were all in attendance. [Daily Mail]

• As if Britney, for Candie's, at Kohl's, wasn't enough, the fallen pop-princess will be immortalized by Annie Leibovitz, Mark Seliger and Terry Richardson. Why not?! [People]
• For Johnny Weir, not following fashion week would be like giving up water." [WWD]

• Rachel McAdams — with a mop of, dare we say it, could that be Kate G.-inspired hair — graces the January cover of Vogue. McAdams went to a couple fashion shows with Anna Wintour in September. [JustJared]

• Yes, this outfit is available! [OC via Racked]
• Kanye's so-last-week jackassery has spawned a tee shirt. We say: stop trying to make "I'ma let you finish" happen! [InventorSpot]
• Miuccia Prada has a "passion for knickers," believes deeply in no-pants. [Telegraph]

LC Lauren Conrad, the latest fashion contribution from the former Hills star, launched today at Kohl's. Compared to her now-defunct "high end" line, the new stuff for Kohl's is just the same shit with a different price tag.

• Mickey Rourke, at Max Azria: "I really don't like Max that much. He's a short little guy with a good looking wife. Maybe I'll steal his wife." [WSJ]
• Tom Ford to close-talking columnist: "Are you trying to smell me?" [NationalPost]

• A rare, left-handed Michael Jackson glove — the one the star wore when he unveiled his moonwalk at Motown's 25th anniversary in 1983 — is to be auctioned in November at the Hard Rock Café in Times Square. [CTV]