It's hard to tell if Michael Alone is a McDonald's knockoff or just a poor translation, but either way, these butchered brands are right up my "you couldn't think of a more original name?" alley.

You can't have the real thing, but you can settle for next-best: Kenneth Jay Lane's "Princess Simulated Sapphire Ring," now on sale at QVC for just $39.54 plus shipping. It's "blue blood brilliance"! Get one for each finger.