The New York Times' Modern Love column is like a box of chocolates, if half of the chocolates were replaced by cringeworthy middle school journals crumpled up and dipped in hardened, bitter regret. I'm happy to report, however, that this week's Modern Love was actually pretty sweet.
A prekindergarten teacher is facing disciplinary action from the Buffalo School District after she sent parents a (handwritten!) letter about how their kids were so gross and stinky that she could hardly bring herself to go near them.
I grew up in Tennessee in the 1980s. This means that when I wasn't being spanked by a paddle, a hand, a belt, or a switch of my own choosing, I was being yelled at. Clearly, I have an extremely well adjusted attitude towards authority figures and a deep, abiding love for all mankind. Which is why it comes as zero…
A Utah woman has given birth to a 14 pound, 22-inch-long baby boy. Calm your wincing ladyparts, though — he was delivered via Caesarean Section. Still. Jesus Olympian Stretch Mark Christ.
Bike helmets are, for bike-wielding kids with only a rudimentary understanding of their own motor skills, a necessary form of public humiliation Even really sleek, Tron-looking bike helmets are humiliating (and uncomfortable) to strap on, and, for a kid with a bike, the first true act of childhood rebellion is…
About a week ago I began deleting all photos and videos of my children from the Internet. This is proving to be no easy task. Like many parents, I’ve excitedly shared virtually every step, misstep and milestone that myself and my children have muddled our way through.
No one wants to raise an asshole and according to a new study the key to that could be making your kid go to bed at the same time every night.
An elementary school in Port Washington, New York just banned all balls that are not made of Nerf foam from its playground. Related: America's Alliance of Kid Bullies just ranked Port Washington, New York as its number 1 favorite bullying destination for summer 2014.
So, on the one hand, "Bat Dad" (no relation to this more famous Bat Dad) is funny — the cadence of his Batman voice is spot-on and he regularly saves his family from their greatest foe, mundanity. On the other hand, Jesus Christ would it suck to live in a house with this guy. I think the only family member still into…
Parents whose children are in New York public schools are pissed that Rosh Hashana has fallen so unusually early this year, which means they have to deal with their kids for an entire extra week of summer break.
Lori Duron is the author of Raising My Rainbow, a popular parenting blog (now a memoir) where she documents what it's like raising C.J., her non-gender conforming son who prefers dresses, dolls and makeup to toys that are typically seen as boyish. Thanks to her popular website, Duron has become the face of non-gender…
I’ve blogged twice about the sexist preview for “Planes,” and after seeing the movie today, I’m afraid I’ve got to blog about this awful scene once more. The sexist scene actually opens the movie. It sets the tone for the whole film, which is the opposite of what I thought the scene was going to do. When I saw the…
"We’d go to bookstores and libraries all the time and I was like, 'Why aren’t there any pictures of kids that look like my kids?'" So fretted actress Garcelle Beauvais, mother to biracial sons. She was so frustrated by the situation, she went ahead and wrote a children's book herself.
"A clean plate is a happy plate" is a common refrain for new parents — but sometimes it's not so happy for the kid. More like "miserable" or "potentially pukey" or "burgeoning weird relationship with food." As if you moms didn't have enough to worry about. I have a fucking CAT, and every time I go out of the house I am…
I'm not a mother, but as far as I can tell, writing about motherhood is sort of like writing about feminism: There's no real right answer, it's been complicated by years of movements and counter-movements, and you're bound to elicit disapproval regardless of what your stance is. Like, obviously. I'm not telling you…
Sorry to sound all fusty and Tom Wolfe-ish, but it's nice to know that even in 2013, when teenage girls are getting pregnant in order to be on MTV and Princesses of Long Island is a show, and Kardashians happen, some people get famous because they're just irrepressible stars. Bright, shining motherfuckin' stars.
A lot of the shit kids say is dumb, like "We should eat marshmallows with every meal," and "Why doesn't everyone roll around on Heelys?" JK that shit is not dumb at all. Kids actually know what they're talking about, because no one has corrupted their innocent little child brains with the deep cynicism that watching hours …
So, on the one hand, children are goblins bent on murdering their younger siblings and slowly driving their parents insane. We know this thing, this is a thing we know. Fine, BUT children are also resilient little cretins whose hearts are full of joy and laughter even if their older sisters spread diaper cream all…
Sam Cornwell, a photographer from England, took a second of video a day and stitched into a video of his son Indigo's first year on planet earth. It's neato — and he's got that song in the background that's used in lots of movies lately to make you cry. When Indigo takes his first steps, I totally said "yes!" out loud.…
Reproducing is like super low rise fit-n-flare glitter jeans: so 10 years ago.
As if being in middle school wasn't already the worst, now parents have the option of temporarily branding their child's arm with a list of known allergies. Next stop? Learning how to market these things as something other than NERD CITY, POPULATION: Kid with the allergy tattoo.
CBC Music arranged for 5-year-old piano prodigy Ryan Wang to play a private concert for a 101-year-old grandma named Dorothy Landry who isn't into "rock n' roll" or "all that modern stuff." And they hug and cry and it's touching as fuq. Because we were not already dehydrated enough by this damn weather without leaking…
It's the best of times; it's the worst of times, ergo: Kids are awesome; kids are dicks. Just like adults! A kid will hand you half of their brownie to share like some angelic little benevolent sugar fairy, and then snatch it right back from you and lick it. Parents are intimately familiar with this Jekyll and Hyde…
When we talk about "hazing" in the media, it's usually in pretty abstract generalities—the victims were humiliated, beaten, forced to drink to excess, and so on—but there's nothing quite like a photograph to drive home just what something means. These photos from an investigation into hazing at Inglemoor High School…
Yes, yes — we all know that the highest calling for women in fascist countries is to birth beautiful, stout baby-soldiers for the State, but a new, conveniently-timed Father’s Day poll suggests that lots of men want to be dads one day. In fact, just about as many men as women aspire to carefully guide an infant human …
You would think that most parents are smart enough to know that their prescription medications' "keep out of reach of children" warning isn't to be taken lightly, but maybe not. Doctors are reporting an increase in incidences of children being brought to the hospital after getting into their moms' and dads' pill…
I know we say things are the world's cutest or best every five minutes. There are two reasons for this: 1. We are hyperbolic, hysterical women; and 2. Things just keep getting better and better, baby! This time, we bring you the New Truth, in the form of the legit world's cutest kid FOR REAL, Luiz Antonio. Take it…
