• Lindsay Lohan has returned from India!

While there, she visited the Sanlaap women's and children's shelter outside Calcutta. She spent about 3 hours with people there, and watched dance performances by the children. With her was a four-person camera crew from the BBC, and, at one point, Lindsay wore a bindi. Of course. [People]

• If you have $300, you can buy a "Marc Jacob" bag from LohanHouse.com, where Lindsay and her family are selling gently used clothes, shoes, hats, bags, and "collectables." [Page Six, Lohan House]
• Chris Brown is pissed that stores are not carrying his new CD, Graffiti. He wrote on his Twitter: "im tired of this shit. major stores r blackballing my cd. not stockin the shelves and lying to costumers. what the fuck do i gotta do... WTF... yeah i said it and i aint retracting shit. im not biting my tongue about shit else... the industry can kiss my ass." He said of a Walmart in Connecticut: "They didn't even have my album in the back… not on shelves, saw for myself. the manager told me that when there are new releases its mandatory to put em on the shelves.. BUT NO SIGN OF GRAFFITI." [MSNBC Scoop, Twitter, Page Six, Gatecrasher]
• Lily Allen may have smoked a cigarette during a concert last week; and if the Liverpool City Council can prove she was smoking, she and the venue could be fined. The council is asking "witnesse" to rat Lily out. [BBC News]
• Jude Law and Sienna Miller: "In love" and moving in together in the new year. As you may recall, their romance began on the set of Alfie; then Jude cheated on her with his children's nanny. Forgive but not forget? [The Sun]
• Playgirl has turned down alleged nude photos of Tiger Woods — apparently taken by Tiger himself. The magazine's spokesperson Daniel Nardicio says: "They were impossible to 100 percent verify, hence the unwillingness to go there." [People]
• Tiger Woods' wife, Elin Nordegren, is not in Sweden, despite some reports. She is in the guest house, which, while large, is not another country. [TMZ]
• Consulting firm Accenture is the first corporate sponsor to officially drop Tiger Woods. [NY Post]
• Tiger Woods' wife will reportedly dump him after Christmas and is talking to a divorce lawyer. As for Tiger, he is seeing a therapist. Allegedly. [Radar Online]
• This report claims that Elin Nordegren wants a trial separation. but that Tiger Woods wants to take a cruise on his yacht with her and convince her to stay with him and have another baby. (?1?!) [NY Post]
• Here, Cori Rist, who hooked up with Tiger Woods, is called a "spectacular escort." [Rush & Molloy]
• According to this report: Tiger Woods and Rachel Uchitel are both in Palm Beach, Florida. But he's on his yacht; she's with her family. [TMZ]
• "Tiger Woods Cheated As Dad Died. Star Bedded Jamie Jungers As Father Lay Dying In Hospital." [Radar Online]
• Gerald Posner reports that Tiger Woods had a "separate team handle his trysts," and that Rachel Uchitel could be getting $5 million to stay quiet. [The Daily Beast]
• A source says Uma Thurman's ex-fiancé was too controlling: "It seemed like he always wanted to run the show… He wanted to bring in his own chef and his own security. He'd talk about redesigning her house in the city and knocking down buildings at her place upstate." [Rush & Molloy]
• Russell Brand was seen spotted shopping for diamonds at Cartier, fueling speculation he's going to ask Katy Perry to marry him. [Daily Mail]
• Is Prince William a "shadow King"? [NY Daily News]
• Jay-Z is well-loved by his Rocawear employees, whose Christmas gift to him was a video spoof of his hit single, "Empire State of Mind." [Page Six]
• Behold: Lady Gaga and Cyndi Lauper in the 2010 MAC Viva Glam ad campaign, shot by Ellen von Unwerth. [The Life Files]
• Susan Boyle says he life hasn't changed that much: "I have everything I had before – it's just a little more interesting now." She hasn't really splurged on too much: She bought "a red couch and some cushions." And, she says: "To anyone who has a dream I say follow that dream. You are never too old. It is never too late. And dreams can become a reality." [People]
• What do we think of Carey Hart's Day-of-the-Dead-style tattoo of Pink? [The Life Files]
• Guy Ritchie is thinking of opening a branch of his London pub, the Punch Bowl, in New York. [Daily Express]
• Sad face: Grizz from 30 Rock is suffering from severe hypertension and has to be on a dialysis machine three times a week. He's on the waiting list for a kidney transplant, but need to lose 75 pounds before he's considered a viable candidate. And the wait is 5 years. He talks about all this on Dr. Oz's show on Tuesday. [NY Daily News]
• The Los Angeles Film Critics Association and the Boston Society of Film Critics agree: Mo'Nique's performance in Precious and Kathryn Bigelow's The Hurt Locker were some of the best moments in film this year. [People]
• Lots of Kerry Washington's favorite places in New York are food-related. [NY Post]
• Candy Spelling, a panelist on E!'s new series, Bank of Hollywood — produced by Ryan Seacrest — says: "I don't have to work. I'm not putting up my own money! We all contributed our salaries, but I wasn't going to pay [the contestants] to be on TV… I love giving of my time and money — I'm very charitable and sit on three nonprofit boards and two city boards as commissioner — but… then I would just be donating money and leaving it up to the contestants as to how it's spent. We all felt a strong responsibility about how they would spend the money." Yeah, I don't know either, but it sounds snotty. [NY Post]
• Sarah Ferguson, ex-Duchess Of York, says she's going to start a historical novel, starring an aristocratic redhead and set in the eighteenth century, "sort of like Pride and Prejudice meets 24. It's actually me putting myself in the eighteenth century… I can just imagine how it would be, and I have such fun!" [New York Magazine]
• Groan: Spencer Pratt now owns a music company, King Spencer Music. Be afraid. [TMZ]
• Entourage's Kevin Connolly says he thinks Rex Lee didn't really mean it when he said he was made fun of on the set because of his ethnicity and sexuality. Pardon? [TMZ]
• At the link, an obituary for Natasha Richardson by Ralph Fiennes. [Guardian]
• Add Kid Rock and Dave Grohl to the list of musicians suing bars for playing unlicensed music. [TMZ]
• LOL: 21-year-old Ekaterina Ivanova is calling ex-boyfriend, 65-year-old Rolling Stone Ronnie Wood, an "evil goblin." [Telegraph]
• CSI Miami's Jonathan Togo was arrested Friday for allegedly getting violent in a fight with his girlfriend; he was booked for felony domestic violence. [TMZ]
• A year after being rejected on TV, Bachelor contestant Melissa Rycroft got married. But not to a guy from TV. [Us Magazine]
• "Garth Brooks & Trisha Yearwood Celebrate Anniversary at McDonald's." [People]
• The Princess And The Frog was number one at the box office with a modest $25 million. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Bentley Meeker is a celebrity lighting guru and you are not. [Page Six]
• "I don't want to talk about him, except that I like him… I think everyone needs an adventure buddy." — Holly Madison on Benji Madden. [People]
• "Whenever anybody say they are going to give me some kind of award, I'm always a little stupefied by the notion. The first thing I say is 'why?' I just go to work like anyone else, except my job happens to be a little stranger." — Johnny Depp, when receiving a career achievement award at the Bahamas International Film Festival. [AP]
• "It makes certain cities impossible to live in. Like Sydney, it makes it impossible for us to live there… We certainly don't get that treatment in Tennessee. But it goes with the territory. It's just, we have to be careful, just to maintain some sort of semblance of a normal life for our child." — Nicole Kidman says attention from photographers is the reason she won't live in Sydney. [News.com.au]
• "I don't have a personal vendetta against Nicole Kidman… These are Machiavellian games that are being played and they are just not right. If she doesn't want to be photographed she should change her profession and become a butcher." — Paparazzo Jamie Fawcett, whom Nicole Kidman has requested a restraining order against and also took to court for placing a listening bug outside her home and following her in his car. [News.com.au]
• "Breaking up the band was a mistake because I think it broke trust with the audience. You had an audience that was very invested in that idea - whether they were invested in the people or the idea or the songs, I don't know. Like a relationship that you break off from and then try to pick back up, it's never quite the same. It doesn't mean it can't be as good, but it has to be different. That beautiful original feeling got lost in the interim of being away. If we had said, 'We just went away for seven years,' it would have been similar, but somehow breaking up, there's a violence to it." — Billy Corgan, on the Smashing Pumpkins. [WENN via Spinner]
• "If I didn't act, I'd be a nutcase. Some people have to do it. They have a lot of emotion they have to get out." — Rachel Weisz, who's in The Lovely Bones. [News.com.au]
• "My body is falling apart. The only way that I could do it is if I played a character who gets shot in the left leg and the right shoulder in the opening scene." — Kenny Rogers says he is too "decrepit" to be in Christmas In Canaan, the movie based on the book he wrote. [Daily Express]
• "Sometimes when I watch the show back I think we've gone too far because I see the pre-story beforehand, I can then see the audition from their perspective and there are times where I think I could have handled that better or I was in a bad mood and I was too rude. At the same time... no-one is sort of dragged kicking and screaming onto the audition set." — Simon Cowell. [BBC News]
• "A journalist went up to my  husband once and said 'did you know that dating anyone more than three years younger than you is considered pedophilia?' [Peter shot back] 'Really? My wife is seven years younger.'" — Maggie Gyllenhaal. [Gatecrasher]
• "Angry African-American women, you know, thought that it would be the image that people would associate with them. Virginiaca is definitely art imitating life, but I understand where they're coming from, and I don't have to project that onto mainstream America. What's funny is funny. This place is well known for getting angry letters — Lorne keeps 50 of them outside his office. It keeps you grounded in the fact that in late-night comedy, you're going to have to burn somebody." — Kenan Thompson. [New York Magazine]
• "I say 'Be Italian' many times in the song, but it was important to me that every time I say it, it have a different meaning, because there are so many different things about being Italian. There's love of life and food and sex and drink. There's love of dancing, love of singing. So it was putting all that into it." — Fergie, on her song in Nine. [NY Post]
• "The negative stuff is crazy and the positive stuff is crazy… I actually see all the discussion and controversy and, you know, 'Is it Smurfs and Dances With Wolves in space?' and all this crap, as good. It fuels interest. All those people that go online and repeatedly dismiss the movie day after day, I know they're going to be there watching it." — James Cameron on Avatar. [NY Post]
• "I think every little girl should be able to feel themselves the princess. I think every little girl is worthy of having a princely young man, and vice versa. It's really thrilling that Zahara will never have a moment where she didn't see herself in that light. She's Ethiopian. She comes from kings and queens. She should certainly know herself as a princess." — The Princess And The Frog's Anika Noni Rose, responding to Angelina Jolie's claim that she's ecstatic that daughter Zahara has a role model. [Ok!]
• "I'm working out again. I'm going to make the sequel to 300. My pecs will be glistening. I'll have a codpiece. I'm going to blow your mind." — Alec Baldwin. [Rush & Molloy]

The Good
No, that's not Kid Rock next to Leslie Mann (whose dress we think looks totally Mad Men and beautiful). That's actually director Robert Rodriguez, who is wearing a crushed velvet sports coat with what appear to be black leather appliqués. (We do not actually want to encourage anyone to wear a crushed velvet sports coat with black leather appliqués; left to our own devices, Rodriguez would be in the Bad. We just liked this photo of them together.)


Budding actress Yara Shahidi shows them how it's done. Perfectly age-appropriate without being cutesy. And she looks like she's having so much fun!


Kat Dennings — the starlet who reads books, everybody! — plays it extremely safe here in an LBD. However: the structured, 50s-style cut is very flattering, and the clutch is a nice touch.

We are pretty sure that "Jolie Vanier" is a made-up name. But whoever this girl is, she knows how to pick a dress. Our only niggle with this one is the non-functional belt on the bodice that threatens to mess with the cool drop-waist silhouette; the color is perfect on her, the cut is interesting but demure, and she looks like she can definitely walk in those shoes. Adorable.


The Bad

Lorielle New, we have three words: Too. Many. Butterflies.

Ashley Edner's outfit wouldn't be an actual Bad, if those outdated slouch cowboy boots didn't give off an I'm-From-A-Large-Discount-Retailer volatile organic compound stench we can smell from here; if cropped black leggings under tunics were not so boring; if Gothic black nailpolish were not so trite; and if those bracelets around the 90s-born actress's wrists did not look like bar bands. That is all.


It's hard to make a balloon-sleeved shrug work. Something with that much volume should probably only top a long, lean silhouette — a column dress, or skinny pants and a long blouse. But Kate Lindor looks like she's not even trying: the shrug is twisted up and hanging wrong, the proportions are wrong, the colors are all wrong. And, if you are going to wear a leather dress, the most important thing is that it fit well. Hell, the only important thing is that it fit well.


Oh no, Leo Howard. We are sure some awful stylist gave you these clothes and said this is how real Hollywood kid actors do it for the red carpet, and you replied, incredulous, "Really?" And the stylist grinned and said, "Yuh-huh!" and you slowly let yourself be convinced. But no. No to the fedora, no to the hoodie — it is August in Los Angeles, remember? — no to scrunching up the sleeves on the hoodie, no to the blinging watch that weighs more than you do, no to the sneakers — do those even fit? — no to the tee shirt with the no-doubt lame, generically off-center, screen print. The pants can stay, if you insist.


What Say You?

Is Lexi Ainsworth wearing an awesome outfit that looks fun without being either too old or too young, with extra props given for a truly great pair of vintage boots? Or is this a naff denim romper, and a borderline-inappropriate slogan tee shirt that appears to say, "Madonna Boy Toy"?

[Images via Getty]

• A smattering of guy-centric sites have decided that August 4 should be A Day Without Megan Fox:

A Megan Fox media blackout day. Which, of course, makes me want to talk about Megan Fox, say Megan Fox and just Megan Fox Megan Fox Megan Fox. [Gatecrasher]

• More info on A Day Without Megan Fox at the link, and, of course, an intro to the Twitter tag #NoMF. [Asylum]
• A family affair: Madonna's daughter Lourdes will be in Her Madgesty's music video for the single "Celebration." [ET]
• Meanwhile, Guy Ritchie is in Montenegro cavorting with 18-year-old twin models. [Daily Mail]
• If this is true, it is Epic: A Kevin Federline weight-loss reality show. [MSNBC]
• A second act for Courtney Love? She may be moving to New York's West Village and signing with a "youthful" NYC music agency which manages bands like Fall Out Boy and Panic! at the Disco. [Observer]
• Chris Brown's "Forever" is in the iTunes top 10, thanks to that viral wedding video. [Reuters]
• Detectives and DEA agents seized cell phones and a hard drive from Dr. Conrad Murray's house yesterday, confirming suspicions that he is the target of a manslaughter investigation. [People]
• Michael Jackson may have used at least 19 aliases to get drugs; authorities are searching Dr. Conrad Murray's medical records for the names. [TMZ]
• "LAPD detectives and members of the L.A. County Coroner's office are gathering info on various doctors who treated Michael Jackson over the years." [TMZ]
• Tito Jackson says: "I had no clue of what was being done by his personal physician whatsoever… but I feel at times he was [encircled by enablers]." [ET]
• Michael Jackson's personal chef recalls the day MJ died — how Dr. Conrad Murray ran down the stairs screaming, "Go get Prince!" [Yahoo News via AP]
• Josh Hartnett moved out of his apartment and an eyewitness says it was kind of a mess: "Organic food everywhere … All that's left is trash and facial products and stuff." [Observer]
• Even Kim Kardashian's BFF Brittny Gastineau was surprised that KK and Reggie Bush broke up. "I loved them as a couple," she says. "They clicked well together." [People]
• Katy Perry thinks Katy Perry's fake Josh Grobin[sic] tattoo is hilar. [Gatecrasher]
• Eddie Izzard will run more than 1,000 miles around the UK in seven weeks — for charity. [The Sun]
• What will you be watching this fall? According on one research company: Jay Leno, Vampire Diaries, Glee and Cougar Town. [Reuters]
• Elizabeth Mitchell dishes about Lost, V, and Sawyer, at the link. [E!]
• Johnny Knoxville: Officially divorced. [Extra]
• "Rachel Weisz sizes up her beefy co-star." [Telegraph]
• Whoa: Bryce Dallas Howard joins the Twilight cast for the Eclipse film, replacing Rachelle Lefevre as the character of Victoria. Not a sparkle vamp fan? All you need to know is this red-haired bloodsucker builds an army. [Variety]
• Charlize Theron will will produce, develop and star in an adaptation of Christopher Buckley's satirical novel Florence of Arabia. (Plot: A State Dept. employee {Charlize} watches her friend marry the prince of a Middle Eastern country and subsequently get executed, then fights for equal rights for the women of that country.) [Variety]
• From a description of Animal Fair magazine's 10th Annual Paws for Fashion Show: "Real Housewife Jill Zarin carried her tiny Chihuahua, whose red neckerchief matched her gown, and America's Next Top Model Jaslene Gonzalez and her Chihuahua wore Nina Ricci." [Observer]
• Slash and Steven Adler were both granted a restraining order yesterday against a woman who sounds a little… off. [TMZ]
• Prepare to weep: In a study of 5,000 children between the ages of 6 and 15, one in 20 picked former Boom Town Rats singer Bob Geldof instead of Sir Isaac Newton when asked to name the man who discovered gravity. A quarter did not know William Shakespeare wrote King Lear and nearly two thirds did not know when the slave trade was abolished in Britain. One in 20 were under the false impression that Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice was written by JK Rowling. [Telegraph]
• ANTM's CariDee English and Semi Precious Weapons frontman Justin Tranter: Makeout sesh in a pool. [Page Six]
• Q: In one scene the female character saws through her husband's leg, and in another the male character ejaculates blood. Is this the darkest film you've ever made? A: "Yeah, it could be. [Pause.] Yeah, yeah. Probably. What am I going to do now? I have no idea." — From a Q & A with Lars Von Trier, on his film, Antichrist. [Time]
• Blind item! "Which hard-partying rockette has so few friends that she calls up her publicist for lengthy four-hour chats every day?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I've butted heads with Ann Coulter many times on TV and I enjoy that. I want it to be a conglomeration of different opinions. I want guests to disagree with me, with each other, and have spirited debates. Not just about politics. I'm interested in everything, except sports and I'm interested in sports if there's an issue involved — rather than, you know, batting averages. [But no yelling.] Even on The View when it gets like that, it gives me a headache." — Joy Behar, on her new talk show for HLN. [LA Times]
• "Personally I think that's one of the most depressing things about the film industry generally today. The writers and directors should be blamed just as much as the studios because really everything seems to be a remake or adapting a 1970s TV show that was never particularly good. Why anyone thinks that it would be a good feature film now, you know, goodness knows why. And I guess it's easy to say it's security that you know a studio is only prepared to put $150 million or $200 million into something if it's a known quantity. But at the same time I'm also aware that audiences are getting fed up with the lack of original ideas and original stories. And if you look back to the great days of Star Wars and Indiana Jones and those sorts of movies, they weren't based on TV shows, they weren't based on comics. They were inspired by them and they had DNA in them which came from years of Flash Gordon and various things in the past but nonetheless they were original. And yet we seem to be incapable as a general industry, which includes not just the studios but the filmmakers and writers and directors, we seem to be incapable of doing that now for some reason. It's a little bit depressing." — Peter Jackson, who is promoting a film called District 9. [LA Times]
• "If one more 'journalist' makes a cavalier statement about me and my band, I will personally or with my fans' help, greet them at their home and discover just how much they believe in their freedom of speech. I dare you all to write one more thing that you won't say to my face. Because I will make you say it. In that manner. That is a threat." — Marilyn Manson. [Page Six]
• "I had a great time when I was young and still feel youthful. But I've no desire still to look as if I'm in my 20s. I don't want to look in the mirror and see The Joker from Batman staring back." — Kim Cattrall won't be getting plastic surgery. [Daily Express]
• "Some people are really passionate about film and some just want to be stars. I'm more interested in film." — Beastie Boy Adam Yauch, who will continue to work with his film company, Oscilloscope Laboratories, despite having cancer of the salivary gland. [Financial Times]
• "I think at first it was odd for the fans when I came on board. There was a question of whether I was going to kind of try to bring some amped up macho mentality … I wouldn't even know how to do that. I think I'm pretty fem. I have a lot of estrogen." — Chris Weitz, director of the next Twilight film, New Moon. [Time]
• Kid Rock does not like Twitter: "It's gay. If one more person asks me if I have a Twitter, I'm going to tell them, 'Twitter this shit, motherfucker.'" [Page Six]

• Chris Brown tried to sit next to Mariah Carey during a private reception after Michael Jackson's memorial. She quickly informed him that she would rather he sit at another table. [Perez Hilton]

• Some have taken Jermaine Dupri's absence from Michael Jackson's funeral as confirmation of the rumors that he and Janet Jackson have split, but a pal says Dupri just "doesn't attend funerals." [Us]
• Janet Jackson has offered to raise Michael Jackson's kids... according to a random Inside Edition reporter. [CBS News]
• Debbie Rowe is suing the woman who sold Extra the emails in which Rowe said she doesn't really want custody of Michael Jackson's kids for defamation and invasion of privacy. Rowe says the emails are fake and she hasn't spoken to the women recently. [AP]
• Sources say lawyers for Debbie Rowe and Katherine Jackson are close to working out a custody settlement. It looks like Katherine will have custody of the children if a judge agrees. [TMZ]
• Hundreds of stuffed animals and other memorabilia left outside the Motown Historical Museum after Michael Jackson's death were buried in two vaults at Woodlawn Cemetary in Detroit. The cemetary, where Rosa Parks is buried and Diana Ross and the Four Tops have plots reserved, donated the vaults to Jackson along with a granite headstone memorial. [AP]
• The Iowa Fair let people vote online to decide whether or not there would be a butter sculpture made of Michael Jackson. Sixty-five percent voted no so plans for the sculpture have been cancelled. [UPI]
• The song "Home", which LaToya Jackson previously recorded to honor her family is being re-released as a tribute to Michael Jackson. The song will be the first single or LaToya's new album. The proceeds will got to AIDS Project LA. [AP]
• Marlon, Randy, Tito and possibly Jackie Jackson will do a paid performance of Jackson 5 songs at Reggae Sumfest in Jamaica next week. [TMZ]
• Prosecutors have opened a manslaughter investigation after the collapse of the stage being constructed for a Madonna concert in France killed two men and injured eight others. [Entertainment Tonight]
• The same company built the stage for the Madonna and Britney Spears concert at Dodger Stadium in November, which also collapsed. The company released a statement saying, "We were incredibly saddened by the tragic accident ... Two of our Directors have flown out to Marseille to visit the injured and to get a better understanding of what caused the accident ...There is absolutely no technical or other connection between the incident at the Dodgers Stadium in November 2008 and the tragic accident yesterday (July 16 2009) at the Velodrome in Marseille." [TMZ]
• Ne-Yo got sick and left the stage crying during a concert in Manchester, England. People thought he was crying because he was singing a tribute to Michael Jackson, but then he was struggling to move and clung onto a table onstage to keep from falling over. A presenter said he had "a really bad fever." [UPI]
• Lady Gaga was asked to wear a less revealing outfit and not dance provocatively for an appearince on Britain's GMTV yesterday mornign. A source says, "She finally agreed to tone it down. The nation would have been coughing up cornflakes if she'd had her way." [The Daily Express]
• Mark Ronson, who produced Back To Black says, "I heard Amy [Winehouse] was back in town, but I haven't spoken to her yet. I'm working on a new record now, but I would love to work with Amy again. I would definitely like to hear what Amy's been working on - she's an amazing artist, so I would be interested in anything she does." [The Daily Express]
• Eva Longoria Parker went camping in Normandy with husband Tony Parker, who is French. An onlooker said, "Sleeping under canvas obviously agreed with her. She looked gorgeous!" [The Daily Express]
• Security has been tightened on the set of The Fighter after an intruder startled Amy Adams in her trailer. "Amy was getting ready to leave the set when the guy climbed the steps right outside her trailer and said: ‘I'm looking for my cousin,'" said a source. "Amy, who was fully dressed and was with a production worker, yelled out: ‘What the hell are you doing?' and the guy quickly climbed down the stairs before running off." [Radar Online]
• Leelee Sobieski is engaged to menswear designer Adam Kimmel. [Us]
• Ivanka Trump gushes about her new fiance Jared Kushner: "Jared is my best friend for many reasons, largely because I've allowed him to see who I truly am and he still loves me... He's a bit of a hero of mine. His ability to remain focused - he lacks an anxiety that's natural for someone his age handed so much responsibility … Sometimes I catch myself looking at him and being thankful that I have grown to a level of personal maturity that I would value so much the qualities he has." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Ivanka Trump's mother Ivana Trump says, "I am so thrilled about Ivanka's engagement. She and Jared have been a serious couple for a long time, and their happiness has grown as their relationship has deepened." [People]
• Oprah's ratings have slipped by nearly a third since 2004. Some suggest people are suddenly tired of her after 20 years and others think it's an Obama backlash... since Obama is so unpopular right now. [N.Y. Post]
• John Goodman will star in The Station a new FOX comedy about CIA agents trying to install a new dictator in Central America. Sounds hilarious! [Media Week]
• Adrian Grenier showed up late to Live With Regis And Kelly yesterday. "I didn't realize it was live! I thought they just tape it," he said. [The Observer]
• Russell Crowe is in negotiations to reprise his role of Jack Aubrey for a Master and Commander sequel. [Yahoo]
• Mischa Barton may be released from psychiatric evaluation on Saturday. "A 5150 is considered a psychiatric emergency, when a person is deemed a danger to themselves, to others or is gravely disabled," says a psychiatrist who doesn't treat her. "A serious risk of suicide is a primary reason for the hold, as well as those suffering from severe depression or schizophrenia." [People]
• Jon Gosselin has moved into a two bedroom apartment on Manhattan's Upper West Side. [People]
• Russell Simmons says his favorite New Yorker is Rev. Al Sharpton. [N.Y. Magazine]
• Here's an analysis of why the ads for Funny People mention that it's a Judd Apatow film but don't print Adam Sandler or Seth Rogan's names. [L.A. Times]
• Kid Rock debuted his American Badass Beer at a his concerts in Detroit this week. He said, "I'm American, that's what I like to drink, and from looking around the parking lot before my shows, I know that's what my fans drink." [UPI]
• Derek and Julianne Hough both received Emmy nominations for a dance they choreographed and performed on Dancing With the Stars I can't think of a better person to be nominated with," said Julianne. "My first time being nominated for an Emmy last year was surreal and awesome, but this time around is more special because Derek and I choreographed to fit our personalities and not the celebrities we dance with on the show." [People]
• Q: You do "hot topics." Doesn't that come from The View?
  Wendy Williams: Yeah. They're the topics and they're hot. What else would I call them?
  Q: You also have a member of the audience introduce you, just like Rosie O'Donnell did.
  Wendy Williams: Are you accusing me of being a thief? Rosie's not using it anymore. Stop being so observant! [Newsweek]
• Marc Anthony scheduled a news conference with the Miami Dophins for next Tuesday. When Gloria Estefan arranged a similar news conference last month she announced that she was becoming a minority owner. [Yahoo]
• Here's the first image from the Broadway production of After Miss Julie, which Sienna Miller and Jonny Lee Miller will star in this fall. [Entertainment Weekly]
• Did you know Vin Diesel has been working behind the camera? He says: "For the mass public I think they probably aren't aware of my directing history but I think when you do the research it becomes super-clear. I think people that know me solely for XXX or Fast And Furious might be a little surprised but I directed a short film called Multi-Facial that was in Cannes," the actor explained. [The Star]
• Taylor Lautner says of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart: "The whole cast is really close. It would be difficult for our characters if we weren't. It's a love triangle, and we need to understand each other. So the fact that we're close and can talk things through in rehearsals, and if we're out at dinner, we'll just randomly start talking about the scene we're shooting the next day . . . If we weren't able to do those things, I don't know where we'd be. [The L.A. Times]
• Here's a video of Stephan Jenkins of Third Eye Blind performing a song he says is about being in love with a lesbian [Gothamist]
• Zooey Deschanel says of the soundtrack to 500 Days of Summer: "If they were bonding over some shitty band, that would actually make me close the script. But the fact that they liked music that was approved by me, because they're bonding over the Smiths, I was, like, ‘Well, obviously!'" [Rolling Stone]
• Zooey Deschanel gives a more detailed assessment of the soundtrack to 500 Days of Summer here: [Esquire]
• "When I first started acting and auditioning, people wanted me to be as generic as possible. When you're going out for the part of 'High School Girl #2,' people want you to be a stereotype. But I was never easily categorized. It was always difficult to reduce me to two sentences. Casting agents don't want unique-they want, 'That girl looks like a bitch,' or, 'That girl looks like a princess.' Eventually, though, you end up building your career on things that are different from other people, but in the beginning it was frustrating. I just try to be myself and as honest as possible-but I have limits." — Zooey Deschanel. [Black Book Magazine]
• An Oompa Loompah was detained by security guards at Florida's Westfield Broward mall earlier today. He had been promoting an upcoming comedy show, but a security officer cuffed him and detained him for several hours. Onlookers laughed and screamed, "Let the Oompa Loompa go!" [Peopel]

• Oh, snap: Paulina Porizkova has been given the pink slip by Tyra and America's Next Top Model! The '80s supermodel told Craig Ferguson on the Late, Late Show:

"Listen, do you know why I am in Los Angeles? Because I am looking for a job. Because I was fired by America's Next Top Model on my birthday." (PP's birthday was April 9.) She continued: "The reason I was told I was fired was because, it seemed, that America's Next Top Model has gotten too fat and they needed to cut some fat and the fat was me. So I figured it was either that or my gigantic huge ego. Which I wasn't aware of until I was told by the producers that I have an ego problem." Will Twiggy come back? Or will the show just have Ms. J, Nigel and Tyra as judges? [E!]

• Did George Clooney get smashed and puke at a party in Miami? A snitch says "He was drinking vodka and Patron, but it looked like he'd had enough," then he hurled in the VIP area. George says: "That never happened, although I was sitting next to someone who did throw up." Right, right. [Gatecrasher]
• Did Brad Pitt get wasted and drunk dial Jennier Aniston? A source says he called and told her he misses her and that he's sorry for any hurt caused." Right, right. [Gatecrasher]
• Someone tried to break into Lindsay Lohan's house yesterday. Cops thought maybe the house was ransacked, but, no, it was just messy. Who among us has not had a bedroom that looked like it was hit by burglars? I have been there. [TMZ]
• Whoops: Rihanna accidentally sent Chris Brown birthday presents! "One of Rihanna's assistants accidentally gave him an expensive pair of sneakers and a watch that Rihanna had bought before they broke up," a source tells Us Weekly. "She no longer wanted to send them." [MSNBC]
• Kate Winslet wears a ring given to her by Leonardo DiCaprio, and it's engraved inside. But she won't reveal what the text reads. One guess: "I'm cold, Rose." [Mirror]
• More on this in Midweek Madness, but Kate from Jon & Kate Plus 8 maybe "drew up a secret contract that allows Jon to have girlfriends on the side - as long as he stays on the show." [Star]
• Former Idol runner-up Clay Aiken has reached out to Adam Lambert, but apparently the Idol producers don't want Gayken anywhere near Glambert. [Chicago Sun-Times]
• Britney Spears' cousin and former assistant Alli Sims has a new single on iTunes, which she alerted her entire phone book about via text message. [Page Six]
• Since what every woman lives for is to be validated by men, Olivia Wilde must be thrilled that she is number one on the Maxim Hot 100 list. [USA Today]
• Wow! Jennifer Hudson looks gorgeous on the new cover of Essence. LOL at the number one sex secret: "Make Him Say Your Name." People! That is a Beyoncé song. [The Life files]
• Michael Jackson could take home more than $50 million from his 50-show stint at London's O2 Arena. [Reuters]
• Michael Jackson's tour is "shrouded in secrecy." A source says "here are some big things that will happen and amaze." [MSNBC]
• Nicole Kidman was supposed to star in a Woody Allen film with Josh Brolin and Naomi Watts, but has "bolted" from the project. [Variety]
• As seen in this 2008 video, Carrie Prejean was a lingerie model for E! [E!]
• Mark Ronson names his "essentials": Lagavulin whiskey; Duran Duran; the Sunday New York Times. Among others. [Men.Style.Com]
• Justin Timberlake's family adores Jessica Biel. [Page Six]
• A 50 Cent/Bette Midler duet would be epic. Amazing! In the meantime, you'll have to make do knowing that they garden together. Sorta. [E!]
• Drop everything and shed a single glistening tear: Chad Michael Murray is leaving One Tree Hill. Ditto Hilarie Burton. [E!]
• This Daily Fail story is about how Leona Lewis is lonely, homesick and gaining weight; based on a few photos. Charming. [Daily Mail]
• Depeche Mode's lead singer, Dave Gahan, is in the hospital in Athens, Greece for an undisclosed illness. Insert "Shake The Disease" or "Just Can't Get Enough" or "Personal Jesus" joke here. [Yahoo News via AP]
• Katie "Jordan" Price and Peter Andre constantly sniped at each other and she called him her "punch bag," so maybe it's best that they have split. [The Sun]
• This report claims that Katie "Jordan" Price was training for a marathon (?!?!) and refusing to fornicate, which is why "sex-starved" hubs Peter Andre wanted out. [The Sun]
• I called this, but here it is: "Katie Price's mystery man is gay equestrian star." [News.com.au]
• Kylie Minogue and her hot hottie boyfriend went to a photobooth where they acted "like a pair of lovestruck teenagers." Whee! [Daily Mail]
• Kid Rock is making an alcohol product called Bad Ass Beer. "It just tastes like good American light beer…an everyday beer," he says. "It's creating jobs in Michigan at the brewing company. We know people are hurting here so we're trying to take that whole approach." [LA Times]
• New day, same story: Trudie Styler, Rainforest Foundation founder, hired a private jet for the White House Correspondents' Dinner. Won't someone think of the epiphytes?!?!?! [Daily Mail]
• Anna Kournikova had so many demands related to a recent speaking engagement — chauffeur, first class plane tickets — that she is being called Costly Kournikova. [Daily Mail]
• This guy who "contributed script ideas" to Guy Ritchie's flick, RocknRolla, is on the "most wanted" list in London; he was involved in a demonstration against Israel's presence in Gaza and his Facebook (?!?!) states, "Muslim first before anything. And InshAllah I will die one…" [The Sun]
• Three words: Goonies cast reunion. [USA Today]
• Blind item! "Which self-branded wanna-be celeb was caught doing the walk of shame at11 a.m. - in her ball gown - after a recent gala in D.C.? [Gatecrasher]
• "It's very exciting and very different than the first one, which is the luxury of getting to do another one. We did the first one, and those were our pent-up things that we hadn't finished in the show, so now we're just starting fresh in a way, which is really, really exciting. It's just a new adventure." — Kristin Davis, on the Sex And The City sequel. [Mirror]
• "I've changed the destination of my wedding seven times." — Rachel Hunter. [Page Six]
• "Somebody told me these people are using it. I hate politics. I just want people to serve the people. I want governments, whichever government comes in, to be unbiased and say there should be justice in the country and that's my purpose in life." — Composer AR Rahman, who is upset that Indian political campaigns are using the song "Jai Hao." [Times Of India]
• "This is what I told the guys: The plan was I wanted to do the dance record, go on the tour, come home and get pregnant — since I'm a pro at it now because I did it before. I'll write the record while I'm pregnant, then after I have the baby, we'll go on tour and we'll have a new No Doubt record. It'll be amazing… It totally didn't work. I don't know how other women feel, but I lose connection with myself because my body becomes this other vessel for this other human, even after a few months, you don't have your body back, you're not yourself. I was feeling not very modern, not very creative." — Gwen Stefani, on working with No Doubt. [LA Times]
• "Lindsay is a good person to have watch over Ali right now. Lindsay can show Ali the ropes. Ali's out there working on her record and singing career." — Dina Lohan. [MSNBC]
• "I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING TWITTER... WHY WOULD I USE TWITTER??? I ONLY BLOG 5 PERCENT OF WHAT I'M UP TO IN THE FIRST PLACE. I'M ACTUALLY SLOW DELIVERING CONTENT BECAUSE I'M TOO BUSY ACTUALLY BUSY BEING CREATIVE MOST OF THE TIME AND IF I'M NOT AND I'M JUST LAYING ON A BEACH I WOULDN'T TELL THE WORLD. EVERYTHING THAT TWITTER OFFERS I NEED LESS OF. THE PEOPLE AT TWITTER KNOW I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING TWITTER SO FOR THEM TO ALLOW SOMEONE TO POSE AS ME AND ACCUMULATE OVER A MILLION NAMES IS IRRESPONSIBLE AND DECEITFUL TO THERE FAITHFUL USERS. REPEAT... THE HEADS OF TWITTER KNEW I DIDN'T HAVE A TWITTER AND THEY HAVE TO KNOW WHICH ACCOUNTS HAVE HIGH ACTIVITY ON THEM. IT'S A FUCKING FARCE AND IT MAKES ME QUESTION WHAT OTHER SO CALLED CELEBRITY TWITTERS ARE ACTUALLY REAL OR FAKE. HEY TWITTER, TAKE THE SO CALLED KANYE WEST TWITTER DOWN NOW .... WHY? ... BECAUSE MY CAPS LOCK KEY IS LOUD!!!!!!!!!" — Your friend, Kanye West. [DListed]

• Sad face: Mickey Rourke's 18-year-old chihuahua, Loki, has died. Rourke called Loki "the love of his life." And famously thanked his all his dogs in his Golden Globes speech. RIP little dude! [E!, TMZ]

• Sarah Jessica Parker's been talking about the Sex And The City sequel. She wants the new movie to be a "massive romp." And she's worried about the consumerism: "How do we address these economic times in a franchise that has a lot to do with luxury and labels? You know, there is a lot that we have to think about because times are very different." Indeed. [UPI]
• Lindsay Lohan was seen having a fabulous time in New York while Sam Ronson was in San Diego, what does it mean??!?! [Page Six]
• The lone Asian dude in Miley Cyrus's "goofy" photo has been identified; his name is Chuck Willis, and he is a model/actor/photographer. Who hangs out with Hannah Montana. [ONTD]
• The Guardian's Hadley Freeman spends five minutes with "the surprisingly tall" Justin Timberlake and promptly falls "a little bit in love." [Guardian]
• Oscar producers want M.I.A. to be on the show so badly — even though she just gave birth — that they're willing to let her perform her track from Slumdog Millionaire from a "large bed" on stage. Or she could appear via hologram. The bed idea sounds kind of awesome, but only if there are dancing orderlies. [NY Mag, MSNBC Scoop]
• More Oscar gossip: Hugh Jackman is hosting, but he'll be joined on stage by Beyoncé, Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens and Mamma Mia's Amanda Seyfried for a big song and dance number, directed by Moulin Rouge's Baz Luhrmann. If they do "Dancing Queen," it just might be the gayest thing on TV since Charles Nelson Riley. [Yahoo News via E!]
• John Mayer will be attending the Oscars, and says: "It's my first Oscars. And it's my first being an Oscar boyfriend. After that night I have a deal almost signed in blood that says I must go into the studio and finish this record. So after Oscar Sunday, Monday morning I'm invisible." [PopSugar]
• Bookies who deal with Oscar bets says Heath Ledger is "such an absolute certainty you've got to feel a bit sorry for the fellow nominees. They have no absolutely no chance whatsoever of winning." [Mirror]
• An L.A. Superior Court judge has ruled that Roman Polanski will have to come to the U.S. and face a judge before his 1977 child sex case can be dismissed. Of course, if Polanski arrives in the States, he faces immediate arrest, as he is a fugitive. [Variety]
• Hayden Panettiere, 19, fresh off of her breakup from Milo Ventimiglia, 31, was seen flirting with Gerard Butler, 39. Can you blame her? He's hot! [MSNBC Scoop]
• Seth Rogen will appear on the cover of Playboy, only the 9th time a dude's been on the cover in 56 years. But will he be clothed? [Page Six]
• Rachel Bilson and Hayden Christensen are engaged, by the by. [Page Six]
• Kanye West looks morose on the new cover of Details and inside says the kind of stuff you expect Kanyeezy to say. Like: "Put this in the magazine: There's nothing more to be said about music. I'm the fucking end-all, be-all of music." And! "People ask me a lot about my drive," he says. "I think it comes from, like, having a sexual addiction at a really young age. Look at the drive that people have to get sex-to dress like this and get a haircut and be in the club in the freezing cold at 3 a.m., the places they go to pick up a girl. If you can focus the energy into something valuable, put that into work ethic..." [Yahoo News via E!]
• Also, when Kanye was 12, he produced a video game: "My game was very sexual. The main character was, like, a giant penis. It was like Mario Brothers, but the ghosts were, like, vaginas. Mind you, I'm 12 years old, and this is stuff 30-year-olds are programming. You'd have to draw in and program every little step-it literally took me all night to do a step, 'cause the penis, y'know, had little feet and eyes." [Yahoo News via E!]
• Michael Phelps is so afraid of people snapping his picture, he's had the windows of his home tinted and he's been hiding out in strip clubs, where photographs are not allowed. No, really, that's the only reason. [Page Six]
• Has Kylie Minogue had cosmetic surgery? The latest edition of the UK's Grazia magazine asks on its cover: "What has Kylie done to her face?" A surgeon who does not treat her has the answer: "Kylie's brows look a little higher than usual, which suggests she's having regular Botox to lift them. One of Kylie's brows is slightly more arched and higher than the other, which is often a telltale sign." [News.com.au]
• Boo-hoo: Eva Longoria Parker is sad that Nicolette Sheridan is leaving Desperate Housewives. "I love her so much as a person, and I love the character of Edie Britt, that I can't imagine the show without her," Eva says. [Mirror]
• Here's a video of Benicio Del Toro talking about playing Che Guevara and doing some really good stuff with his expressive eyebrows. [Guardian]
• Kid Rock is making Kid Rock Beer, which is expected to create 394 new jobs in Michigan. Those without jobs will at least have something to drink? [Detroit Free Press]
• Ashton Kutcher is in negotiations to star in a flick called Traded, about a superstar NFL quarterback and a 12-year-old middle school geek who magically trade bodies. Sort of Freaky Friday Night Lights. [Variety]
• Bob Barker "relaxes in retirement with dog and bottle of tequila." He doesn't watch Price Is Right. [ABC News]
• Set your DVR; A&E has ordered 11 episodes of Hammertime, a show which tracks the life of MC Hammer and his family. Can't touch this? [Variety]
• Luther Campbell from 2 Live Crew was arrested for contempt of court last night; he owes $10,233.36 and he'd better pay up. [TMZ]
• Morrissey, who turns 50 in May, says of the chance that he'll still be in the music biz at age 55: "I think it's incredibly slim. For heaven's sake!" [Daily Express]
• Blind items! 1. Which movie producer is finding out bad habits die hard? Despite being married, he asked a gorgeous, dark-haired woman back to his hotel for a "late-night private audition" after a dinner at the Berlin Film Festival. As the actress accepted, look for her to appear in his upcoming pictures. 2. Which kooky fashion figure asked for illegal substances on her contract rider? She said in order for her to appear at a fashion show, she needs two bottles of Cristal and "cocaine - a lot of it." [Page Six]
• Blind item: "Which F-list celeb had an abortion six months ago? We hear she's still not sure who the father was." Wait, why do we care about this? [Gatecrasher]
• "God, I might pass out. Your heart pounds really hard, and just that moment…wow. My grandmother is coming. My mom and my grandmother. Three generations. " — Taraji P. Henson, on being a nominee at the Oscars. [Washington Post]
• "My mother, she was like, 'I don't know if Mama wants to come because she had a knee replacement surgery and she's been going to the doctor and it's a long evening.' I said: 'Mom, you know what? Why don't we just let Grandma make the decision? Let's call her and let her say no.' We called her on a three-way and I said, 'Hey, Grandma, we got an extra ticket for the Oscars, you wanna come?' 'I sure do, baby!' She did not hesitate, do you understand? Grandma is not going to miss it for the world, do you hear me? She didn't want to hear about how long it was going to be. She didn't want to hear about that, she'd moved on to what she was going to wear. She was like, 'Well, I have this outfit and these shoes.' I was like, 'Bring it, Grandma.'" — Taraji P. Henson. [WaPo]
• "It's just something for your eyes to look at. It's just a change from the norm, innit? The problem is, I never buy a piece of art. I don't see the point in buying something because I know my eyes will get bored of it eventually. You know, a lot of museums keep the stuff, they rotate it, because people get sick of looking at it. They shift the art around, don't they? People go, 'I'm sick of that now.' They move it around the world, let someone else's eyes look at it." — Ricky Gervais, on art. [Guardian]
• "I really believe I'm on the very tail end of television as a big money-making business. I think there will always be a certain number of people who make a lot of money, like American Idol or NFL football, but I just think that in 10 years when people have good Internet connections, there are going to be a thousand channels. People will be making money, they just won't be making a lot of money. Even successful shows or programming will bring in small amounts of money." — Jimmy Kimmel. [Broadcasting & Cable]
• "Oh my God, I'm one of the greatest rappers in the world. I'll get on a track and completely ee-nihilate that track, I'll eat it and rip it in half. I wouldn't have to think of it. […] I have, like, nuclear power, like a superhero, like Cyclops when he puts his glasses on." — Kanye West. [Yahoo News via E!]
• "The next chapter of your life has begun. The toughest decisions you will ever have to make lie in front of you. You have shifted the cultural paradigm of America, but now you have to live up to the ideal that fostered the shift and ensure that the paradigm doesn't shift back. You must deliver." — LL Cool J, in an (open, unsolicited) letter to Barack Obama. [Mirror]
• "I am her biggest fan and I can't get enough of her. But wearing my fashion hat, I want to say to Meryl Streep, 'You need to accept responsibility for what you are wearing. I don't know that you do.' The message she's sending is, 'I'm too smart for this and it doesn't matter to me what I'm wearing.' I want to say to her that it should matter to you." — Tim Gunn. [MSNBC Scoop]

• Joaquin Phoenix, who recently retired from acting, officially launched his rap career this past Friday. Says Phoenix: "Are there people who think it's going to suck? Probably, but I can’t worry about that." [People]

• Why rap? "This is me saying this is who I am," Phoenix says, "This is my story." He then added, "This is my life, this is no Mekhi Phifer." Ok, not really. But you know you were thinking it too! [People]
• Portia de Rossi says that her marriage to Ellen Degeneres has changed her life: ""There's a peace to [being married] and a sense of togetherness that we just didn't have before. And I didn't even realize it would change as much as it has, but it's so lovely," de Rossi says. [People]
• The Youth of America will be represented, at least in musical form, by Kanye West, Kid Rock, and Fall Out Boy, who have been asked to perform at the Youth Inaugural Ball. In related news: the Youth of America can't wait until they are old enough to vote, so that they can avoid being represented by Kid Rock and Pete Wentz once and for all. [People]
• Anne Hathaway has a bit of Princess Mia in her after all: "I was on a first date with someone and I was so nervous I think I had crossed my legs really tight and stuck them under the table and was leaning against them and at one point I got up to go to the bathroom and my leg had fallen asleep but I didn't know it so I stood up and fell into the next table," Hathaway says, "I was laid across it and the guy was like 'Are you ok?' I was hoping somehow that he hadn't noticed. The worst part was that I had to walk to the bathroom with a kind of limp, dragging my leg."[ShowbizSpy]
• Kendra Wilkinson is now apologizing for remarks she made about Hugh Hefner and their sex life in USWeekly: "I'm really bad at interviews, and anyone who knows me knew I meant no harm...I'm a goofball. Mostly, I'm very sorry to have hurt Hef...Playboy made me who I am, and Hef has done more for me than anyone else," Wilkinson says, "In my heart, I will always love Hef and Playboy."[E!]
• Renee Zellweger has no plans to be a mother anytime soon: "Motherhood has never been an ambition. I don't think like that. I never have expectations like, 'When I'm 19 I'm going to do this, and by the time I've hit 25 I'm going to do that'," Zellweger says, "I just take things as they come, each day at a time, and if things happen then all well and good."[ShowbizSpy]
• Kate Winslet has no desire to live like Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie: "Although I don't know them, I do think about their situation. They're like a walking soap opera, and the public wants to know what's going to happen next. I didn't choose this profession because I wanted to be famous. I come from a family of actors, who have often struggled, so I always thought I'd be lucky if I even got a job," Winslet says, "I'm grateful for my success because of the freedom it's given me as an actress. The downside is how much more publicly available you become. I don't want Mia or Joe to think being famous is about wearing beautiful dresses - if you're on a red carpet and wearing a fabulous frock, it's the result of years of hard graft."[DailyMail]
• Amy Poehler is getting ready for the launch of her still-untitled new show: “You just try to do your best and work with talented people,” Poehler says, “Doing stuff that is a little scary, I think is good. You have to keep moving.” E!]
• Matt Lauer will be the first to interview hero pilot Chesley Sullenberger. The interview will air on Monday's Today Show. [NYTimes]
• You know how you saw a commercial for Paul Blart:Mall Cop and thought to yourself: Who is going to see that? Well it turns out everybody did: it's currently leading at the box office, fending off My Bloody Valentine and Notorious. [EW]

• Gwyneth Paltrow may be launching a chain of gyms with her trainer, Tracy Anderson. [Digital Spy]
• Gisele Bundchen and Tom Brady: Engaged. Congratulations are in order, unless you're a Giants fan... or Bridget Moynahan. [People]

• Britney's former manager, Johnny Wright, says that she isn't ready for a comeback. “She’s being pushed back into being a money machine," said Wright. “I want her to be happy in her heart, then go back to the business because she wants to, not because people are convincing her she has to, or that it would be good therapy for her.” [Perez Hilton]
• Radiohead provided the background music (and an appropriately unsettling tone) for this PSA on homelessness. It's the first time they've let their music be used in an ad. [Ad Week]
• On Sunday afternoon, Fergie and Josh Duhamel went to LAX to catch a flight to their tropical honeymoon at an undisclosed location. When asked if she would have kids soon, Fergie joked, "I'm pregnant with twins." Ha. [People]
• Kevin James and his wife named their new baby girl Shea, after the former home field for the NY Mets. [Perez Hilton]
• Marie Claire nosily inquired as to whether cover girl Renee Zellweger would ever get married again, and she said "never say never." But, rather than sitting home an moping about the prospect of spinsterhood, she's keeping herself busy. Says Zellweger, "I suppose if I sat still long enough to get to know somebody beyond a dinner date, maybe. But I don't feel like my life is empty or that I have to make something happen." [People]
• Kid Rock says he doesn't understand rehab an insists you can live a normal life while doing drugs. He says: "Some people do a line of cocaine and start selling their TVs and their guitar and everything else. Other people do it, have a fun night and go about their business." Kid Rock adds that he has a different personality when he drinks and probably should be in AA. [Daily Express]
• Joseph Brooks, 70, who won an Academy Award for writing the song "You Light Up My Life," is a suspect in five sexual assaults. He is accused of luring aspiring models and actresses to his apartment through ads on Craigslist and forcing himself on them. [UPI]
• The Travolta family has released a letter thanking their adopted home of Ocala, Florida for their support, writing, "Ocala's citizens have made an impossibly painful situation, a little less painful." [People]
• Patti LuPone stopped singing a few bars into the final number of her show Gypsy because a man was using flash photography. She refused to sing for five minutes until he was ejected from the theater. [NY Magazine]
• Jeremy Piven says he is embarrassed by some of the public backlash to his claim that he has mercury poisoning ... but nothing is as bad as the mercury poisoning that brought him to his knees. Sniff! [People]
• Mad Men creator Matt Weiner is not signed on for season three and said at the Golden Globes, "I don't know anything about next season — I don't even know if it's happening." But don't worry, Weiner is still in negotiations to stay on and AMC has announced that the show will go on with or without him. [E!]
• Hilary Duff will star in a new show called Barely Legal, based on the true story of an 18-year-old who passed the bar exam. It's like Doogie Howser, M.D. with lawyers! [Arts Beat]
• Ryan Seacrest joked this morning that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie snubbed him at the Golden Globes last night because they don't know who he is. [Perez Hilton]
• Heath Ledger's dad says of his late son's Golden Globe win for Best Supporting actor, "he would have been running from the media, but he would have been very proud." [News.com.au]
• Vanessa Hudgens may have been cast as a werewolf in the new Twilight movie. [Perez Hilton]
• "As an artist, [Yoko] Ono undoubtedly has her moments; but, for the most part, her work is muddled by the kind of whimsical freethinking that is a hangover of the Sixties and Seventies, and which today seems fey, pretentious, out of touch and out of date." - Telegraph critic Alastair Sooke on the new Yoko Ono retrospective Yoko Ono: Between the Sky and My Head. [The Telegraph]

• Liz Taylor is reportedly on life support after suffering heart failure. A source says, "Doctors though they were going to lose her." The 76-year-old was diagnosed with pneumonia last week. Be well! [Daily Mail]
• Tom Cruise is named in a $250 million federal lawsuit against the Church of Scientology. It seems that the guy behind the suit, Peter Letterese, is using a celebrity name to get attention. It's working. [Rush & Molloy]
• Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick left a NYC restaurant. Together. Which is a "show of unity" after the news of his affair broke, according to this paper. [Daily Mail]
• Ryan Gosling made his DJ debut at the Green Door Lounge in Hollywood Tuesday night and guess who showed up? Rachel McAdams! Ryan and his ex talked when he was away from the booth and a spy says, "He seemed happy to see her." Ryan played tunes from the '40s and '50s. [People]

• The best news we've heard in a long time: Britney Spears wants nothing to do with Sam Lutfi. [TMZ]
• Also, Britney's conservatorship — in which her dad takes care of her — will be extended until the fall. [TMZ]
• Blake Incarcerated is so depressed he's stopped his mopping job. A source says, "[It] may sound funny, but it gave him something to do. Instead he mopes around his cell." Jail isn't supposed to be fun, babe! [The Sun]
• Gossip Girl's Leighton Meester: Dating Entourage's Joshua LeBar? [Star]
• Jennifer Garner was seen walking out of a doctor's office with a piece of paper with the words "March 2" circled, so E! is speculating that March 2 could be her due date. Didn't she say she was four months pregnant? March is seven months from now. Babies don't hang in there for 11 months. Also, who the hell cares what her due date is? [E!]
• Ivana Trump fell while partying on Denise Rich's yacht in Saint-Tropez. She's gonna be okay. [Rush & Molloy]
• Kate Middleton refused to upgrade to first class on her trip to Barbados to meet Prince William; she wanted to be treated as a regular passenger. Um, if there is a first class seat to the Caribbean up for grabs, I know someone who wants it. I've already packed. [The Sun]
• Alicia Keys protested her concert in Indonesia being sponsored by cigarettes, so Philip Morris pulled the billboards and posters down. She also released a statement: "I am an unyielding advocate for the well-being of children around the world and do not condone or endorse smoking," she said. Love her! [Yahoo News]
• On an episode of Living Lohan, Ali went on a casting call and met with some Hollywood types — including Peter Davy. He's made some "adult" movies like Breast Wishes 14 and Bun Sisters 12. So yeah, at 14, she's already met a porn producer. [MSNBC]
• Jessica Simpson is on the cover of Elle in a skin-tight plaid shirt and jeans. And the writer asked her if she'd ever been abused: "I don't want to talk about it, but I have definitely experienced abuse in a way that I would tell people to take their heart and run," she said. Wait, what? [ET]
• Liv Tyler's estranged husband Royston Langdon might sing for Velvet Revolver, now that Scott Weiland has left the band. Shallow opinion that is neither here nor there: Scott's hotter. [People]
• Kanye's late mother, Donda West, owes $606,983.43 on her home; it's being foreclosed upon. Kanye's got some paperwork to take care of. [Perez Hilton]
• Ed McMahon's money troubles continue: He owes lawyers $275,000 for handling his daughter's divorce. Ouch. [Yahoo News]
• Katy Perry recorded a song called Breakout a few years ago and Miley Cyrus did it recently. You can hear both and pick a fave if you care. [ONTD]
• The Black Crowes are suing Gretchen Wilson for song stealing. Her "Work Hard, Play Harder" apparently has parts of their 1991 track "Jealous Again." [Yahoo News]
• Oh! You can compare and contrast the songs here. [E!]
• Kid Rock's being accused of assault. This is from a 2006 incident with autograph seekers at Hollywood's Roosevelt Hotel. You know what's funny? Someone wanted Kid Rock's autograph. [Yahoo News]
• India.Arie was supposed to debut on Broadway in For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow Is Enuf, but there's a delay, due to money probs. Boo. [USA Today]
• Chuck Kelly and his ad agency partner Chris Preston wanted to name their company Kelly Preston. Except they realized there is a Kelly Preston, and she's married to John Travolta. Although she was born Kelly Kamalelehua Palzis. [AdFreak]
• Jacob The Jeweler is suing Wyclef Jean over non-payment for bling. [Crain's]
• Remember D'Angelo? There's a story about him in the August issue of Spin. Apparently being sexy ruined his life. "We couldn’t get through one song before women would start to scream for him to take off something,” says an insider. "It wasn’t about the music. All they wanted was for him to take off his clothes." Another source says,"He’d get angry and started breaking shit. The audience thinking, 'fuck your art, I wanna see your ass!' made him angry." Welcome to life as an object. Many women know exactly how you feel. [Stereohyped]
• "Dylan was doing occupations at school recently and the teacher said, 'You have to go home and ask Mummy and Daddy what they do.' So we were trying to explain to Dylan that we make movies and he went to Michael, 'Hang on. Mama makes movies, you make pancakes!' So my two-time Oscar-winning husband with a career of 40 years looks at me and says, 'Oh, it’s come to that!' — Catherine Zeta Jones discussing her son (and husband Michael Douglas). [The Sun]
• Doug Reinhardt, who went out with Lauren Conrad briefly, went on the radio and said, "She a good kisser." What a gentleman. [E!]
• "It's about empowering girls," Lauren says of The Hills. "You're gonna have bad boyfriends and best friends-turned-enemies. You need to be yourself, you need to work hard and you'll get there." [ET]

• Okay, it's slightly less random than it seems: Dempsey's wife, Jillian, has been Avon’s global creative color director since July 2006. Not that this really excuses it. Or why WWD refers to "Unscripted", ominously, as the actor's "first scent." And about that name: does he really want to take credit for ad-libbing the Grey's dialogue? [WWD]
• Meanwhile, in other fragrance news, Josh Hartnett is fronting "Emporio Armani: Diamonds for Men," [ET]
• ...while Eva Mendes is the, um, face of both Calvin Klein's new Secret Obsession perfume and its "Seductive Comfort" underwear line. Quoth the loyal pitchwoman, ""I wear [Calvin Klein] G-strings all of the time on the red carpet and when shooting for a film because you don't see the [panty] lines." [WWD]
• Christian Siriano: "I am honored to be a part of this amazing group of talent!” Siriano said. “It is a dream to work with legends such as [director] Charles Shyer, Uma Thurman and [costume designer] Milena Canonero on a wonderful story filled with creative inspirations." The project? Eloise in Paris. [E!]

• Meanwhile, fellow PR winner Jay McCarroll is shilling his wares on QVC. [Blogging Project Runway]
• I think we can all agree that there's no such thing as too many Karl Lagerfeld documentaries. [WWD]
• German Elle celebrated its big 2-0 in Berlin. Yes, Lagerfeld was there. [WWD]
• In one handy reference: the Ethical Fashion Directory. [The Guardian]
• Bravissimo offers "full-figured" nightwear; PJs that actually support. 'Rather than the 'one size fits all' approach, Bravissimo's designs are based on a standard sized back, shoulders and waist but, within each dress size, offer different sizes to account for the fullness of the bust.' [The Star]
• Model Lily Cole in French Playboy, which is allegedly more 'artistic' than the Yank version. Hm. [Fashionista]
• Long-awaited Prada flagship opens in San Francisco. [WWD]
• CondeNast'sFashion Rocks, the worst fashion and music magazine in the history of the universe, will come out in September, and the accompanying concert features Rihanna, Beyoncé, Justin Timberlake, Fergie, Mariah Carey, Keith Urban, Kid Rock and Lil Wayne. It'll air on CBS. [E!]
• Yup, the death watch is on for Mervyn's, all right. We feel bad for the chain's founder. [Los Angeles Times]
• That Visa London clothing swap LiLo fronted? Listen to this undemocratic twist: "Participants dropped off unwanted items at collection points over the last six weeks, receiving points on a swipe card. The more exclusive the outfit, the more points they received, which they could spend yesterday on other donated items." Wait, who determined "exclusivity"? [The Observer]
• Russian public schools ban "emo and goth" clothing. [Fashionista]
• "But fashion is also theatre, a world of make believe, and there is nothing more theatrical than revealing the layers of artifice that construct an image, especially when it is done within the image itself. It is like the conjurer's reveal." The intricate dance that is Fashion Photography. [The Guardian]
• Alexander Calder's jewelry, which he mostly made for family and friends, is on display at the Philly Art Museum. And it's amazing. '"He's not a jeweler,"a curator said. "There are no welds. He's working on an anvil and a bench, but he's not doing what jewelers do, not making links or soldering things. He's taking wire and doing stuff with it that no one else was doing. With basic wire."' [NPR]
• New York's Clock Tower Building, a century-old Madison Avenue landmark, is getting a makeover. By Versace. The quietly tasteful fashion house is decorating 55 apartments and a spa. presumably gold, cheetah, tanning beds will figure prominently. [Reuters]
• Betsy Johnson is awesome, has a "man-lover." [WWD]
• Parishoners at St. James United Church of Christ have modified 150 pairs of boxer shorts for wounded veterans, replacing the shorts' side seams with fasteners so they are easier to fit over bulky prosthetics and braces. Good work and probably something that people don't often consider. But the fact that they're bringing the undies to the altar to be blessed on Sunday is just peculiar. [USA Today]
• "Jacques Kaplan, 83, Bold Furrier, Dies." [IHT]
• Designers Kate&Kass name their designs after famous women. They have an Ingrid Newkirk. Also a Benazir Bhutto minidress. [Fabsugar]
• In spite of economic challenges, textile fairs thrive. [WWD]
• Seattle Jezzies: donate gently used prom duds for low-income teens. [,a href="http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/lifestyle/371628_tf222.html?source=rss">Seattlepi]
• Bravo's Runway replacement? UK import Fashion House , which "replicates the workings of the fashion business through a fashion house." Teams of designers will live together and work to create an entire line — rather than just individual pieces — that has the potential to be purchased by commercial buyers.' We want to believe! [New York Magazine]
• British denim brand Lee Copper celebrated its centennial with various one-off collabs: "From the gothic-inspired denim dress complete with Swarovski crucifix designed by Giles, to the vintage denim jacket emblazoned with signature gold lips by Jade Jagger, each and every piece is set to shoot straight to the top of every fashion fan's wishlist." Well, let's not get carried away, here. [ElleUK]

• Heidi and Spencer are going to Iraq to "perform" for the troops. And Meghan McCain — John's daughter — may be helping with the travel arrangements. Head. Exploding. [People]
• Omarosa went on Wendy Williams' new talk show Monday and shit got heated. Omarosa didn't like the way Wendy introduced her; when Wendy held Omarosa's book up to the camera, Omarosa snatched it out of Wendy's hand. Omarosa attacked Wendy's appearance, asking whether she'd had a nose job and saying she shouldn't wear wigs. "Omarosa wished her career was my career," Wendy says. "Omarosa is a delusional, D-list, pathetic woman." [Breitbart]
• Ooooh! Video of Omarosa and Wendy! [E!]
• This confusing report seems to hint that Christian Bale's mother and sister have accused him of assault. Say it ain't so. [The Sun]

• Was the Madonna/A-Rod kerfluffle engineered by manager Guy Oseary to give the Yankee a higher profile? [TMZ]
• Is Madonna overdoing it? Apparently, between the A-Rod drama and tour rehearsals, she is anemic, has a knee injury and is "down, physically and mentally." Call a waaamubalnce. [The Sun]
• Peaches Geldof, 19, nearly died from a drug overdose. The daughter of Former Boomtown Rats singer Sir Bob, 56, stopped breathing and was given mouth-to-mouth resuscitation by a pal. The party girl refused to go to the hospital when an ambulance arrived, fearing her dad would find out. Peaches felt well enough to attend the premiere of the Dark Knight the next day. [The Sun]
• Chinese star Tony Leung Chiu-Wai's wedding to Hong Kong actress Carina Lau Kar-ling is causing a "frenzy" in the entertainment news media in Hong Kong. Related: That is one hot couple. [International Herald Tribune]
• A Boston couple denied producers permission to shoot a film in their apartment building because Mel Gibson is in the movie. Ouch! [UPI]
• This blood-covered woman holding a gun is Nicole Richie. No, really! It's a still from her stint in the NBC show Chuck. [EW]
• Look out below! Bill Murray plans to jump out of a plane at the Chicago Air and Water Show next month. [UPI]
• When asked about the historical inaccuracies in The Tudors, Jonathan Rhys Meyers responded thusly: "We're not making a documentary for universities. Having actors with an appealing look is what an audience demands today – especially when there's quite a bit of sexual activity involved." [Telegraph]
• May 29, 2009 — Jay Leno's last day as host of The Tonight Show. [Reuters]
• Denise Richards went to court yesterday and the commissioner denied the majority of her requests regarding her custody battle with Charlie Sheen. It was a closed door hearing so we actually don't know what the hell the requests were. [USA Today]
• Remember back in October when Kid Rock was in a brawl at Waffle House? There's video now. Kid has a bodyguard and some pals, the dude he punched was alone. Seems like the fight was 4 on one…Scattered, smothered, covered, etc. [TMZ]
• Bloc Party frontman Kele Okereke claims he was the recipient of a racist tirade from the Sex Pistols' Johnny Rotten. Rotten, whose real name is John Lydon, denies everything, calls Okereke a liar and says: "Grow up and learn to be a true man." [LiveNews, Guardian]
• Girls Gone Wild mogul Joe Francis pleaded not guilty to tax evasion — he claims he's being targeted by the IRS because of how he makes a living. What's wrong with plying underage girls with alcohol and filming them in the shower? [LA Times]
• Does Miley Cyrus want to "transition" into adulthood with a racy film role? [MSNBC]
• Shanna Moakler vs. Kim Kardashian: Kim turns out to be the classy one in this fight. Imagine that. [Perez Hilton]
• Because Blake Incarcerated has already served most of his 27 month sentence, he should only remain in jail 18 more weeks — Christmas with Amy! [The Sun]
• Holy smokes: Britney left her lighter and cigarettes out on a table and Sean Preston, 2, picked 'em up. Playing with a lighter for 2 seconds might not kill a kid but it's a bad idea, no? [NY Post]
• Oh yes. There are pictures. The kid is holding the lighter. [Egotastic]
• Britney's Britney Spears Foundation has a $200,000 deficit, uh-oh. [Fox News]
• If you're rich, fashionable celebrity, you're in Portofino, Cap D'Antibes or St. Tropez right now. [Page Six]
• Al Reynolds has a new lady and she looks like Star Jones. [Page Six]
• Alec Baldwin: Pissed Diane Sawyer had to reschedule an interview because her husband, Mike Nichols, had heart surgery. [Rush & Molloy]
• Sam and Lindsay were in New York! They were seen on Mulberry street on Friday night and were in the Hamptons over the weekend. [Rush & Molloy]
• Taye Diggs was asked about that N-word debate that brought Elisabeth Hasselbeck to tears. "She doesn’t understand, and, no offense — I don’t think any white person has the right to tell a black person or to even weigh in on subject matter such as that. They don’t know what it’s like to be called that word; they don’t know what it’s like to be black," Diggs says. "They can have an opinion, but… don’t take a word that you created and called me for many, many years, and then me being in my position, have the strength to change what it means in my own culture. Don’t try to take it back now. Now it’s ours. Leave it alone." [Perez Hilton]
• "The breakdown of a marriage is a very difficult and painful experience especially when children are involved. In light of the fact that many pictures have surfaced in print and on the Internet which has caused myself and my family great embarrassment, I felt it necessary to at least acknowledge publicly that yes indeed my wife and I have separated and I will not be commenting any further." — Balthazar Getty. [Yahoo News]

• Drew Barrymore and Justin Long: Dunzo. Sigh. They seemed so ridiculously happy, didn't they? They've been together since August 2007, though they knew each other for seven years before getting serious. Drew's been through so much… Sniff. [Us Magazine]
• Kate Moss and Jamie Hince: Also splitsville! Sob. Now Cher is stuck in my head. [People]
• Matthew McConaughey is a dad! Camilla Alves gave birth to a baby boy yesterday. Matt and Camilla are both "stoked." [Us Magazine]
• Lily Allen is back with Ed Simons from the Chemical Brothers. This is according to diligent reporting by checking their Facebook profiles. [The Sun]
• Oh! And Samantha Ronson bought Lindsay Lohan a $21,000 Cartier ring. It's not an engagement ring, it's a token of her commitment. But yeah. Ah, love. [Mirror]
• James Haven and Maddox Jolie-Pitt visited Angelina Jolie in the hospital over the weekend. Still no twins! [People]
• Amy Winehouse is addicted. To tanning beds. [The Sun]

• Wait! Amy Winehouse as Doctor Who? Seriously? [The Sun]
• Ashley Dupré, the high-class hooker of whom Eliot Spitzer was a client, is developing a cable reality series. Hmmm. Possible names: Hookin Ain't Easy, Girl Gone Mild, You, Me & Dupré. Meh. Got anything? [E!]
• Did Nicole Kidman name her new daughter Sunday because Keith Urban has a song called Sunday? Or is it because Nic's Catholic and still bitter about her Scientology experience? [MSNBC]
• Steve-O says that after 115 days of sobriety, he's "back in the looney bin." Uh-oh. [USA Today]
• Pete Doherty missed a £60,000 gig this weekend because his cat went into labor. Kittens! [The Sun]
• Serena Williams's maybe-boyfriend Common was in London where — what a coincidence! — Serena was kicking ass at Wimbeldon. She had a house, he had a hotel room, the whole thing is super hush-hush. [E!]
• Maggie Gyllenhaal checked in with Katie Holmes before she agreed to play the part of Rachel in the new Batman flick. "I wanted to be sure, first of all, that I had her blessing," Maggie says. "And I was assured that I did. I'm a big fan of hers, I think she was really great in the first movie. And yet I felt like it wouldn't have done anyone any good if I tried to imitate her. Really what I decided was that it had to be a whole new woman. If I'm going to do what I do well, I have to be free to do it." [Contact Music]
• Shaquille O'Neal is supposedly getting divorced, and yet he was all hugged up with the wife in the Cayman Islands over the weekend. [TMZ]
• Selma Blair was one of the only Hellboy II stars who didn't have to wear prosthetics or heavy makeup, so naturally, she teased her castmates relentlessly. "On the hottest days, when the other actors [couldn't] breathe in their makeup, I breeze in and say how sweaty I feel in my cotton tank top," she says. I plan to see this movie, and I'm not ashamed to say so. Anyone else? [Page Six]
• Are you interested in Kid Rock's "skanky panky"? Click here, no one will judge you. But it's not that interesting. [Rush & Molloy]
• Psyched about Mamma Mia!? Don't get your hopes up for an ABBA reunion tour. [Yahoo News]
• The Osbournes are coming back to TV! The family will host a prime-time variety hour kinda like Sonny and Cher had. Good idea? [Reuters]
• News you did not need to know: Flavor Flav lost his virginity at the age of six. [Perez Hilton]
• Keanu Reeves' court transcript regarding a paparazzo's negligence lawsuit will be sealed because it's none of your business. [E!]
• Kanye West may be taking anger management courses. [StereoHyped]
• "I thought innocent until proven guilty also applied in U.S. law. It seems sad when, as everybody who has had a drug problem knows, it takes supreme effort to get where I am today. I was really looking forward to doing my first live tour for a decade, and to be told that after all this hard work, I am not welcome in the U.S. for even six short weeks is heartbreaking. I am hardly a threat to national security. I am just a performer trying to do his job." — Boy George. [Newsweek]
• "My life is part humor, part roses, part thorns. I'll come off the stage at Texas Stadium (and) I'm a rock god. And then, an hour and a half later, I'm throwing a football and waiting for a cheeseburger from a truck stop at Carl's Corner, alongside a freeway. That is the balance in life." — Bret Michaels. [USA Today]
• "I don’t expect to ever get married again or have children. I am never at home and every woman gets sick of it… If I was them, I would never put up with me for long — and they don’t." — George Clooney. [MSNBC]
• Bette Midler answered Vanity Fair's Proust Questionnaire. Her life motto: "Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke." [Variety]

• Nicole Richie and Joel Madden did not get married this weekend, despite reports by Star magazine that they were having a $2 million wedding. But! Joel did post fake wedding pictures on his band's blog with a message that read: "I've been getting calls and texts from my family all week asking me why they weren't invited to my wedding. I guess the only answer I could give them was that I didn't know we were having one." In the pix, he and Nicole are gorillas. [E!]
• Amy Winehouse agreed to sing at the party of a Russian billionaire, but when she showed up in Moscow, she was "in no condition" to appear on stage. Organizers spent two hours trying to pull her together, and a source says "she put on a terrific show." [Rush & Molloy]
• You may have heard that Scarlett Johansson and Barack Obama have an e-mail relationship: But did you know that Scarlett's brother Hunter works for the senator? [Page Six]
• M.I.A., whom this paper calls a "lady rapper," is engaged! Check out her bling. [Rush & Molloy]
• Tim Russert's heart was enlarged. [People]

• Ashanti says that she and Nelly are "good friends," who might get engaged in the future. [People]
• Kate Hudson and Lance Armstrong: Hanging out in Canada, where Lance was in a fund-raising bike ride. [People]
• NCIS actress Pauley Perrette is asking the public to help find her missing friend. "Her purse was found at one end of Runyon Canyon with all the contents in it; her jewelry was found in another part of Runyon Canyon," says Perrette. [E!]
• This picture of David Beckham talking to Didier Mbenga of the L.A. Lakers is high-larious. [ONTD]
• Has Lily Allen given up partying??? [Mirror]
• Princess Eugenie: Seen frolicking naked on school grounds. [Daily Mail]
• Snoop Dogg's wife was busted for DUI over the weekend, and from the looks of her mugshot, she was wasted! [TMZ]
• Kid Rock was hospitalized for stomach cramps and dehydration over the weekend. [TMZ]
• At her baby shower, pregnant 24 actress Mary Lynn Rajskub jumped into the swimming pool to beat the heat. [People]
• Mary-Louise Parker broke her toe during a love scene for Weeds. "I smashed it on the bed frame," she says. [People]
• Britney Spears and Kevin Federline were both in Vegas over the weekend, though they apparently didn't run into each other. Kev was honored as Father Of The Year; Brit had father's day dinner with her dad. Where were the kids? [People]
• Sean Connery was in the hospital Friday for a fractured ankle he suffered while playing golf. How does that happen? Don't you just hit the ball as far as you can and then get in a little car and chase it? [Star]
• A Hindu leader wants Mike Meyer's new movie, The Love Guru, to have an NC-17 rating. Says Bhavna Shinde: "From the information available about the movie, it appears to be mocking and ridiculing Hinduism, Hindu philosophy, ashram life, Hindu concepts and terminology, Gurus, etc. Cinema is a powerful medium and it can create stereotypes in the minds of some audiences, especially in the minds of younger audiences, who are passing through an impressionable phase." [Punjab Newsline]
• Is actor Michael Madsen is being a total pain in the ass on his new movie? [Rush & Molloy]
• What are all of the kids from the School Of Rock now? Find out! [ONTD]
• Legendary actor Richard Dreyfuss: Seem "ogling the bare-breasted talent" at Larry Flynt's Hustler Club. [Page Six]
• Is anyone sorta curious about Kit Kittredge: An American Girl'? Starring Abigail Breslin? At the premiere, Abigail said, "I'm excited to see all the girls, and welcome the boys who come too!" Boys? Really? [ET]
• Keira Knightley's mom says Keira is not anorexic, and that she "eats like a horse." "She has always been thin. She's her daddy's daughter, with his long body." [The Sun]
• The Sun has apologized for a false story it printed about Rhys Ifans punching Sienna Miller's friend and co-star Matthew Rhys. [The Sun]
• Dr. Oz from Oprah — getting his own show. [UPI]
• Does Hugh Laurie have a Burger King Gold Card? Does he get limitless supply of free burgers? Do all celebs get one? So. Jealous. Hate to miss a Whopportnity. [ONTD]

The Good:
Alicia Keys exudes class and good taste while Christina Applegate brings new life to the color purple.

The Good...But:
Vanessa Hudgens and Miley Cyrus both look super cute. But aren't their dresses a little short given their ages? (Also, Hudgens is starting to bear an uncanny resemblance to early 90's Mariah Carey. Just saying.)

The Bad:
Rihanna's dress is wearing her, not the other way around and Avril Lavigne forgot it isn't Halloween and clearly came as Streetwalker Barbie.

Carrie Underwood is being slowly choked by her dress while Ashley Tisdale channels Mr. Roboto.

The Ugly:
Taylor Swift not only pairs cowboys boots with a cocktail dress, but wears sheer stocking to boot. (No pun attended.) Meanwhile, Fergie's neck is moments away from bearing stigmata.

Phoebe Prince and Kid Rock: No further explanation needed.

• If you believe the UK tabloids, which are using Italian sources, Angelina Jolie might be pregnant, OMGWTFYAY. [Mirror]
  
• Um, yeah, the UK papers are really really pushing the story that Angelina Jolie is pregnant. And Cate Blanchett too. [The Sun]
  
• Did something go wrong between Joaquin Phoenix and Eva Mendes? While they were filming We Own The Night there was talk of them hooking up — now they're snapping at each other in the press. [Page Six]
  
• Madonna dated Tupac. One more time: Madonna dated Tupac. We don't even have words. [Gatecrasher]
  
• Owen Wilson went on a date with Jessica Simpson. Is that really what he needs? [Mirror]

• Amy Winehouse was supposed to come to the US next week — and be on Saturday Night Live — but her arrest in Norway will prevent the trip. Also, her father, Mitch, says she's still suffering from bulimia and substance abuse. [The Sun]
• Britney's mom, Lynne Spears, will release her memoir next Mother's Day. Working title: Pop Culture Mom: A Real Story of Fame and Family in a Tabloid World. How do you think it will end? [Gatecrasher, 4th from bottom]
• Blind item! "Which blond sitcom star and new mom should watch her man more closely? When apart, he likes to hit on girls that look a lot like her." [Gatecrasher, last item]
• Was Brad Pitt was turned down from the Barack Obama campaign because Obama doesn't want to seem "too Hollywood'? And are Brad and Barack 9th cousins? [Rush & Molloy]
• Tommy Lee is not pressing charges against Kid Rock for that scuffle at the MTV Awards last month. Eh, we'd already forgotten about it. [People]
• Kate Hudson's star-studded Halloween party included Ashley Olsen as a vampire, Taye Diggs as an old-skool rapper and Oliver Hudson as a guy with his dick in a box. [E!]
• Britney Spears showed up at a Virgin Mega Store in Hollywood for the release of her new album — but she couldn't find parking, so she left. [ET]
• Wanna see a picture of Kimora Lee Simmons at age 14, holding a McDonald's cheeseburger? Fabulosity! [The.Life Files]
• Southern California native Gwen Stefani is donating proceeds of her concert tonight to victims of the wildfires. [MTV News]
• Kanye West is releasing a book of "Kanye-isms," "the creative, humorous and insightful philosophies and anecdotes used in creating my path to success." Give a black man a chance! [MTV News]
• The Hills bit player Brody Jenner's mom RSVPs to parties for him. Why are we not surprised? [Page Six]
• Someone pranked a conference call with the anchors of the Today show [Page Six]
• Ivanka Trump got bounced from an New York bar for forgetting her ID. [Page Six]
• Fall Out Boy's Pete Wentz broke his foot during a performance because he rocks so hard. [Friends Or Enemies]

• Rose McGowan and her Planet Terror director Robert Rodriguez: Engaged! She was previously engaged to Marilyn Manson; he was previously married to the mother of his 5 kids. (Did we ever tell you our theory? That Rob likes Rose partly because her name starts with an R? His kids are named Rocket, Racer, Rebel, Rogue and Rhiannon.) [People]
  
• Word on Britney Spears is that she will get one monitored overnight visit with her kids per week. Apparently her behavior in the courtroom was "appalling." She interrupted the L.A. County Commissioner, was "sarcastic," "contentious, argumentative and condescending." [TMZ]
  
• Hmm, or did she address the judge in a "soft and respectful voice" ? [People]
  
• In any case, after court, Britney went shopping at Neiman-Marcus. [ET]

• Is Michael Lohan a two-timer? A Long Island woman claims she had an "intimate, loving" relationship with Lindsay's dad for the past four months, only to find out this week he had another girlfriend. Michael denies her allegations, saying, "This woman is a liar. She's neurotic." We're trying to figure out why anyone would lie about having sex with Michael Lohan. [Page Six]
• Wednesday, Gene Simmons from Kiss slipped a flight attendant a note that read "Would you like to get together???" She declined. [Page Six]
• Jessica Simpson may not have a hot CD or TV show, but she's raking in the cash from Proactiv — she re-signed for another year of infomercials, a roughly $3 million deal. [Page Six]
• Kid Rock's CD release party was filled with Kid Rock look-alikes, ew. [Page Six]
• But uh, women like his look? Because Kid Rock has two women fighting over him. One's a model, the other a Penthouse Pet. [Rush & Molloy]
• Apparently new movie We Own The Night opens with a sexy scene that involves Joaquin Phoenix "proving his manual dexterity" with co-star Eva Mendes. We have no idea what that means but we want to see it. [Page Six]
• Leonardo DiCaprio's model girlfriend, Bar Refaeli, is suing an Israeli newspaper for libel after claiming she said, "I am not sorry for not serving in the army ... Why is it good to die for our country? Isn't it better to live in New York?" Refaeli's lawyer Dror Arad Alon said the statements are false and that she was "wickedly manipulated." [Rush & Molloy, 4th item]
• Pete Doherty plans to celebrate being sober by going on a "Dry Tour" in booze-free venues. Great for Pete, maybe not so great for the people who have to listen to his music without a cocktail? [The Sun]
• Divorce talks between Heather Mills and Sir Paul McCartney have completely collapsed, and the couple is heading for a "full-blown public divorce hearing." The date is set for February — anything could happen before then! [Daily Mail]

• Go ahead and file this under things you hate yourself for wanting to know more about: Kimora Lee Simmons wants another baby — and she wants boyfriend Djimon Hounsou to be the daddy. Seems like they spent the weekend in Antigua uh, trying. [Page Six]
  
• Click! Joaquin Phoenix hung up on a reporter from Time Out New York when she asked him how he prepared for his role as a druggy club owner in We Own The Night. [Page Six]
  
• Lindsay Lohan wants to move to Utah, partly to be with her new boyfriend, snowboarder Riley Giles. [Gatecrasher]
  
• Pamela Anderson: Pregnant with Rick Salomon's baby? [Gatecrasher, 3rd from bottom]

• Blind item! "Which light-footed contestant on a celebrity TV challenge was so nervous before going on that he actually tossed his cookies backstage, in front of the other celebs?" [TMZ]
• Lost actress Michelle Rodriguez will serve 180 days (that's six months!) in jail for her DUI, probation violation and hit and run. [TMZ]
• Bobby Brown is in "great spirits" after having a mild heart attack Tuesday and hopes to perform this weekend, which is his prerogative. [People]
• Oh, except, according to Bobby, he didn't have a heart attack. He "went in for a check up." [ABC News]
• Christopher "Big Black" Boykin of MTV's Rob & Big is going to be a dad! His unnamed baby mama is due in February. [People]
• Kid Rock: "Getting married is the most fun you can have in life. Being married sucks." [People]
• Madonna's deal to leave her record label has almost been finalized. She's entering an agreement with concert promoter Live Nation for more than $100 million. [NY Times]
• Sir Paul McCartney and Heather Mills were in court finalizing the terms of their separation, which could be the most costly in British legal history. Paul has offered £20 million, but Heather wants more like £50 million, and sources say since he is worth £825 million, he may have to pay £70 million. We'd be happy with £1 million. Seriously. Uh, how much is that in dollars? [Telegraph]
• Eva Longoria wants to have a baby, but if she gets knocked up it will destroy the plotline of Desperate Housewives. The show's creator Marc Cherry has "forbidden" her to get pregnant. Can he do that? [Mirror]
• Amy Winehouse "flew into a jealous rage" when she thought husband Blake Fielder-Civil was flirting with supermodel Lily Cole. The couple were heard screaming at each other for 20 minutes in a toilet stall and the marriage is reportedly "hanging by a thread." [Mirror]
• Samantha Ronson has sued Perez Hilton for repeating a report claiming that she planted cocaine in Lindsay Lohan's car. The judge couldn't find evidence of malice, and the case could be dismissed today. [Yahoo News]

• After three hours in court (Kevin Federline showed up, Britney Spears did not) a family court judge decided that Kevin will retain custody of the kids. For now. Britney is allowed monitored visitation. There will be another hearing on Oct. 26. Also? Kevin was wearing an eyepatch. Britney was at Starbucks with her dog while this was going on. [TMZ]
  
• Is Britney checking into a Caribbean rehab facility this weekend? That would explain why she's so calm. [Perez Hilton]
  
• There is good news for Britney: "Gimme More" is number one on Billboard's Hot Digital Songs chart and #3 on the pop charts. [L.A. Times]
  
• "You are a pig, A sad jobless pig who is sad and talentless..." That's an excerpt from an e-mail from Charlie Sheen to Denise Richards, which she included in documents filed in the custody battle. Also included? Pictures of Charlie's "erect penis" he used for his profile on sex sites. Do not want! [Page Six]

• Ben Affleck is teaching his daughter to love the Red Sox. Poor girl! [Page Six]
• The Angelina Jolie pictures on the cover of In Touch that prompted the "Is she pregnant" story were cropped to hide her flat, flat stomach. Of course! [Page Six]
• Evan Handler, who played Harry Goldenblatt on Sex And The City, showed up to the set of the film Tuesday — and production was halted due to his chronic hiccuping problem. LOL. [Page Six]
• Kim and Kourtney Kardashian: Underage nude picture scandal? Why are we not surprised? [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which weight-loss poster girl has her people replace the labels on her clothes for photo shoots — from 8's and 10's to 4's and 2's?" [Gatecrasher, last item]
• Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez and his wife Cynthia are expecting a baby, due in the spring. [People]
• Rita Cosby, author of Blond Ambition: The Untold Story Behind Anna Nicole Smith's Death was served papers regarding the $60 million suit by Howard K. Stern right on the red carpet of her book party. Ouch! [Radar]
• Sienna Miller was banned from her new movie's afterparty — maybe the producers of the film she is currently shooting wanted to make sure she didn't show up hungover? [Daily Mail]
• Nick Cannon and fiancée Selita Ebanks: Dunzo! This despite the fact that he asked her to marry him via Jumbotron. [People]
• Kid Rock claims that ex-wife Pamela Anderson lied to him about having a miscarriage. Pam says he's just "bitter." But she doesn't deny it, hmmm. [People]
• Are you ready for a Larry Birkhead "day in the life of a daddy" reality show? Yeah, neither are we. [Rush & Molloy]
• Nicky Hilton, Wilmer Valderrama and Nick Lachey are joining forces to open a restaurant called Company in Las Vegas' Luxor hotel and casino. Uh, thanks but no thanks. [E!]

• Britney's former bodyguard says one night he saw her "out of it" in a trashed hotel room with crystal meth paraphernalia and he "thought she was going to die." [The Sun]
  
• The bodyguard was also concerned that Britney would drown the kids. [Us Magazine]
  
• In addition, Britney was seen leaving her attorney's office in tears. It's kind of heartbreaking, isn't it? [X17]
  
• Stephanie Allen, whose family is worth about $1.4 billion, is divorcing her husband, Tony. Exhibit A in the divorce file? Lindsay Lohan, with whom Tony has reportedly gotten close while staying at Le Cirque rehab in Utah. [Daily Mail]
  
• Salma Hayek has given birth to a baby girl, Valentina Paloma Pinault. If you're thinking of sending a gift, keep in mind that Salma's baby daddy/fiancé François Henri Pinault, is the CEO of the firm which owns Gucci and Yves Saint Laurent, so the kid's probably got everything she "needs". [People]

• George Clooney and his girlfriend were in a motorcycle crash on Friday. Clooney suffered a hairline fracture of a rib and road rash; Sara Larson's foot was broken. They were treated and released from the hospital. The most disturbing part? The crash happened in Weehawken, N.J. [People]
• Mariah Carey is famous, you guys. She showed up to an event with eight "massive" bodyguards and had the bathroom shut down for 10 minutes while she primped. [Page Six]
• Las Vegas entertainment promoter Jeff Beacher is offering Kid Rock and Tommy Lee a $5 million prize to settle their feud in a winner-take-all boxing match. Dude, no one cares anymore. [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which aging action hero travels around with at least three of his 'boys,' aka equally aging pals, and has them do his dirty work to get rid of women when he tires of them?" [Gatecrasher, last item]
• Did you know that Jodie Foster wears a hearing aid? [Daily Mail]
• Angelina Jolie's next kid may come from Myanmar. Which the Brit papers insist on still calling Burma. [Daily Mail]
• Sharon Osbourne says her son, Jack, was given OxyContin when he was 15 — by Courtney Love. [Daily Mail]

• Brad Pitt bought a Patek Philippe watch (the $15,000 model is considered cheap) yesterday, making those Angelina "he spends money like water" comments seem true. [Rush & Molloy, 2nd item]
  
• Vincent Gallo is pissed at the New York Post for intimating that the dick in his film Brown Bunny wasn't his, or real. Insert eyeroll here.[Page Six]
  
• In Toronto, a homeless guy told Colin Farrell it was his 55th birthday, so Colin took the "vagrant" to a travel outfitters shop and bought him a thermal sleeping bag, new clothes and some luggage — and gave him a "wad of cash." Gotta love the Irish! [Page Six]
  
• Vogue editor Anna Wintour reportedly sends tennis player Roger Federer stuff with "little notes that say 'This would look great on you.'" Rrrow! [Page Six]
  
• Is Leonardo DiCaprio's girlfriend, Bar Refaeli, destined for the cover of the 2008 Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition? She's on a photo shoot in Israel right now. [Page Six]
  
• Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott are "in talks" to star in Chicago on broadway. Together. [Page Six]

• Helena Christensen's neighbor is suing the model for "loud offensive sound and noise." Is the model having too much fun with Heath Ledger? [Page Six]
• Superproducer Timbaland says Britney needs to apologize and get herself a "comeback story" [Showbuzz]
• The artwork for Britney's new single: not half bad! [The Sun]
• New Vanessa Hudgens pictures show her making kissy faces with other girls and sticking out her tongue, yawn. [News.com.au]
• But Vanessa did cancel her appearance on The Tonight Show With Jay Leno tonight? [People]
• A former bodyguard claims that Larry Birkhead did a staged photoshoot at Anna Nicole Smith's son Daniel's gravesite. So not surprised. Also: someone has pictures of Anna, the baby and Daniel in a hospital bed — and Daniel "appears to be dead." [Rush & Molloy]
• Model/actress Jamie King: chased down FedEx trucks to find her engagement ring. [People]
• Kid Rock denies that he hit Tommy Lee because of Pamela Anderson. "It had absolutely zero to do with her...." [People]
• Shakira: taking a class in the History of Western Civilization at UCLA. Seriously. [People]
• Is Britney going to show up at the Emmys? [Us Magazine]
• Amy Winehouse turns 24 today! She's been seen eating McDonald's and West Indian food to put on weight, says a source. [Mirror]