Kelly has a mouth on her, especially when talking about what it's like to be a successful woman. “I think that people hate women. And I don’t think they like powerful women, and I think it really goes back to Salem, I really do. I think it really goes back to this concept of, you know, hysterical coming from uterus… I think that people really have to look back to Egypt, and this concept of women being in power is not a new thought. With the advent of religion, you saw the demise of the female in the godhead. In Christianity, Mary gets pregnant on her own, she doesn’t even get fucked.”

As raunchy and fantastic as that vagina monologue was, Kelly's secret plans for The Hills are really the best part about her interaction with Observer all-star Meredith Bryan. Cutrone is friends with Paul Morrissey, a former denizen of Warhol's factory. She also lives with an up-and-coming male model named Demian, though their relationship is strictly platonic. So Cutrone's brain came up with this little gem of an idea: “I was like, ‘Paul, if I get Whitney to marry Demian, will you come and direct an episode of The Hills?’ That would be the ultimate Warhol thing, right? To get fucking Paul to do an episode of The Hills would be amaaaaazing!” My brain just exploded from all the meta.

The Dark Angel Of The Hills [Observer]

Earlier: Fashion PR Lady Kelly Cutrone Is So Boss

• Bex bares (almost) all for Armani once more. After the item, People earnestly queries, "Tell us: What do you think of David Beckham’s ads?" Eager to see the conversation this generates. [People]
• The previously-discussed Italian Vogue featuring only models of color hits European newsstands next Thursday! "In a reverse of the general pattern of fashion magazines, all the faces are black, and all the feature topics are related to black women in the arts and entertainment." [New York Times]
• Tyra Banks is one of said black models. (Click to see awesome pix.) [Fashionista]
• Tyra's new show Stylista: OBVIOUSLY BIGGEST THING OF THE SUMMER. [Fashionista]
• "Soften your image" for only $99! Michelle Obama's View dress at Donna Ricco! [Donna Ricco]

• Night owl Kate Moss launches her second perfume in Berlin. "Moss was actively involved in choosing the fragrance, packaging and name, vetoing options like Enigma and Velvet Night and instead going with Velvet Hour, a name she says invokes dusk, a favorite hour of the day. 'There's that feeling — Oh, nighttime's coming again, thank goodness,' Moss said." [WWD]
• These celebs are so enterprising! Mischa Barton's new handbag line set to launch next month. The collex is described as "30 vintage-inspired shoulder bags and clutches in earth-tone colors." No word on whether Barton was "actively involved in choosing" said styles, colors. [fabsugar]
• Adidas sues WalMart over use of stripes on sneakers. [WWD]
• Lovable Ginnifer Goodwin wins MaxMara "Face of the Future Award!" Not sure what that is, but love her acceptance speech: "And here’s to us not wasting our brain power on counting the calories of our suppers." [People]
• Diesel kicks off South Beach's "Fashion Week Swim" with, um, swimwear. [WWD]
• Fashionista goes "behind the scenes" at Kate Spade. They talk shorts. [fashionista]
• Awesome/terrifying fashion flack Kelly Cutrone, Observer via "The Cut": “I wouldn’t want 80 percent of [powerhouse fashion firm] KCD’s roster,” she insisted. “I would never rep Versace, I can’t stand her, I think she makes disgusting clothes. Calvin [Klein] is like, snore! Who wears Calvin Klein? I’m not dissing him. I think he’s built an amazing, respectable business, but I would never want to work for Calvin Klein, ever.” And that's just the start! [New York Magazine]
• Patricia Field to hawk clothes for home-shopping channel? Actually makes sense: Will probably hit coreSATC demographic! "The stylist has teamed with the shopping network on an exclusive brand, Destination Style New York, launching on TV and on hsn.com on Sept. 23. The collection, designed by Field and longtime House of Field designer David Dalrymple, is made up of 50 pieces ranging from sportswear and denim to dresses and accessories." [WWD]
• Michelle Obama feted by those who really matter: The fashion world. Pundits like Zac Posen and Tory Burch applauded the maybe-first-lady's sartorial instincts, Isabel Toledo gown. [WWD]
• But if you swing pachyderm: Cindy McCain's look for less. [The Budget Fashionista]
• Awesome-sounding "whimsical" sports-bra ad! Titled "The Apology Letter," the ad focuses on a female runner reading to men and women who usually stare at her bouncing breasts. She tells the gawkers they will "no longer have a free show due to her new extra support CW-X bra." [WWD]

Image Copyright 2008 Giorgio Armani

• Europeans are always more progressive than Americans. Rumor is, Italian Vogue may be producing a cover featuring only black models. [Fashionista]
  
• Oh. My. God. High School Musical and Hannah Montana-inspired Crocs, soon available at a store near you. [Yahoo]
  
• Francis Ford Coppola and Sofia Coppola will be the next faces of Louis Vuitton's "core values" campaign (the very same campaign in which Keith Richards agreed to participate in exchange for a LV monogrammed guitar case.) What do you think the Coppolas get out of this? An LV director's chair? An LV vinyard? [WWD, 1st item]
  
• "Boyfriend" jackets are big for spring. But Peter Som says the ones he designed for Bill Blass are inspired by Hillary Clinton and Michelle Obama. [WSJ]

• Elle editor-in-chief Roberta Myers has decided not to assume the role of president of the American Society of Magazine Editors, most likely because she is too hell-bent on becoming a reality TV star. [WWD, 1st item]
• Rumer Willis, Kristin Cavallari, Christina Milian, Josie Maran, Pete Wentz, Corbin Bleu and Wilmer Valderrama have all apparently gotten desperate and all collectively facing Wal-Mart's Op line's latest ad campaign. [Just Jared]
• If you are dying to know what's in Kimora Lee Simmons' makeup bag, well, here's an itemized list. [Marie Claire]
• The rumors are true: Linda Evangelista will be the face of Prada's Fall 2008 ad campaign. [FabSugar]
• Tory Burch refers to her employees as her "family". [WWD, sub req'd]
• Kanye West-endorsed, Damien Hirst-designed t-shirts to benefit Bono's Product (RED)? Oh my. [Chic Report]
• Uber fashion publicist Kelly Cutrone likes chopping vegetables and washing dishes. [WSJ]
• Moby: Wants you to design a t-shirt for him. [USA Today]

Earlier: Fashion PR Lady Kelly Cutrone Is So Boss

Stranger, still, is who the fashion industry is blaming on this shift to skinny: Consumers themselves. Kelly Cutrone, head of PR firm People's Revolution, explains that fashion is simply "responding" to what men want. Spoken in true PR speak. Has anyone heard about the obesity epidemic in this fucking country? According to the New York Times the average weight of the adult American man has risen from 166.3 in 2002 to 191 pounds today. Meanwhile, Tyson Beckford continues to mentor aspiring male models on Bravo's new reality show Make Me A Supermodel, where the models are put through rigorous exercise regiments to achieve greater muscle mass.

Considering the fact that women wield enormous influence over the wardrobes of the men in their lives, we'll ask you: is there anything stylish or even sexy about the sight of a concave or malnourished man in a pair of skinny jeans?

The Vanishing Point [NY Times]

• British Fashion Council head Harold Tillman wants to start a "Big Sister" program in which old skool supermodels mentor malnourished up-and-coming mannequins. Leading the way in this admirable new endeavor? Naomi Campbell. [Vogue UK]
  
• Elsewhere in Naomi news, she uses Berlin Fashion Week to point out on the 75th anniversary of Nazi rule that, uh, the industry is still pretty white. [Guardian UK]
  
• Elsewhere in Naomi news, did you know she asked Hugo Chavez about the Spice Girls? [Guanabee]
  
• Karl Lagerfeld: now a teddy bear. [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• Remember Zulema? From Project Runway season 2? Who got voted off for a dress which Michael Kors described as looking "like something the town whore's mom who's a real bad sewer made"? Which doesn't even make sense, but whatever? Well, now she's showing her collection during New York Fashion Week... on her MySpace page. [Sassybella]

• Balenciaga designer Nicolas Ghesquiere: really, really good at sports. Who knew? [WWD, 1st item]
• I would actually play sports if it gave me an excuse to wear Chanel. [Vogue UK]
• At Betsey Johnson's Fall/Winter 2008 runway show on Saturday (don't worry, we'll be there), the designer will be celebrating the 30-year anniversary of her line with a retrospective of 15 different looks from the house's history. She'll still be doing a cartwheel at the show's end, another 30-year old tradition, too. [WWD, 3rd item]
• Although many designers (including Marc Jacobs, Donna Karan, DVF) are showing a single "green" look at tomorrow night's "Future Fashion" show, the sisters Mulleavy of Rodarte are making their entire collection eco-friendly this season. [Fashion Week Daily]
• The recession might be bad for you, but it's going to be great for the kids looking for work in sweatshops. [Guardian]
• Um, I'm weirdly excited by a website entitled MyTights.com. [FabSugar]
• Thou shalt wear your hair in a low and tight bun for spring. [BellaSugar]
• Mischa Barton's Spring 2008 Keds ads are so much better than the ones she did for Iceberg. [Sassybella]
• Oooh video of Chanel couture collection from 1983. [Sassybella]

• Carrie Bradshaw in Burberry in Sex and the City movie ads: Potentially even more damaging to the brand than the chavs? [Vogue UK]
  
• Quick turnaround! Halston redux will be available on-line on Net-a-Porter the day after its runway show next week? Says Net-a-Porter chairman Natalie Massenet:"I am sure this will be a shock to the brands that specialize in knocking off some of the talent in the fashion industry. They had their cake and have been eating it for a while." [Vogue UK]
  
• All employees in the Tod's group were just given a $2,000 bonus by Group head Diego Della Valle as an "I'm-Sorry-The-Italian-Economy-Is-Bad-Right-Now" gesture. Um, are you reading this, Mr. Denton? [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• Cynthia Rowley: Now designing for Target. [WWD, 4th item]
  
• ThreeAsFour: Now designing for the Gap. [Fashionista]

• Louis Vuitton, not content to merely assault us with logos in magazines, on billboards and plastered across half the luggage in LAX's baggage carousels, is producing television commercials now too. [WWD]
• Since the stars have no awards shows to go to it looks like many will be coming out to New York for next week's fashion shows instead. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Alberta Ferretti has inked a fragrance licensing deal with Elizabeth Arden; the label's premiere scent is set to launch in spring 2009, with a skin care line to follow. [WWD, 1st item]
• Ralph Lauren just opened a new endoscopy wing at the Ralph Lauren Center for Cancer Care and Prevention in Harlem. We never knew that Ralph was all into helping cancer patients in Harlem! [WWD]
• The Spring 2008 Nordstrom campaign is all artsy and highbrow, with paintings done by Ruven Afandor. Paintings done by Ruven Afandor on models, that is. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Marie Claire editor-in-chief Joanna Coles on the reasoning behind the pre-Fashion Week dinner she threw: "The designers needed help and the models needed feeding." [Fashion Week Daily]
• More from PR pro Kelly Cutrone on preparing for Fashion Week: "Mara Hoffman...refus[ed] to show before 2:21 p.m. on February 2 as the moon would be void, off course (of course)...Araks will show first, immediately followed (after 2:21 p.m.) by Mara. I call Mara and ask, "What is happening astrologically?" She replies, "Mercury is in retrograde." [Chic Report]
• No shocker here: More and more people are buying clothes from Amazon.com. [Times of London]
• How bad is the economy? So bad that lipstick isn't even selling. And lipstick sales are supposed to go up during a recession. [AdAge]

• "With so many magazine images that are so completely retouched, we've gone in the opposite direction, showing the soul of a woman." That's artist Francois-Marie Banier, on this Diane von Furstenberg ad starring Natalia Vodianova. Which makes us wonder, if that is the "opposite direction" of the retouching trend, we sort of wonder what that trend would look like "taken to its hyperbolic extreme." [Vogue UK]
  
• And in other DVF news, Diane is suing Target over a wrapdress. Wait, you're telling us Target didn't invent the wrapdress? [Reuters]
  
• Kate Moss and Naomi Campbell are appearing on the February cover of French Vogue together — with Naomi appearing sans hair extensions. What would Tyra say? [Fashion Week Daily]

• Fashion PR guru Kelly Cutrone on her blog on Fashion Week Daily: "I woke up this morning and thought, 'I wonder if, when you die, is there a fashion section in heaven?' I also wondered if you had spent a great portion of your life working in fashion if you would be mandated there. Next I asked, 'Is there anyway I could avoid going to the fashion section of heaven?'" Oh Kelly, don't worry, you're all going to hell anyway! [Fashion Week Daily]
• Stella McCartney for LeSportsac! [Sassybella]
• Stella McCartney lingerie! [Nylon]
• Quote of the day, from WWD: "SAGGING ECONOMY BE DAMNED. Plenty of women are spending the equivalent of nearly two barrels of oil — or more — to slather themselves in luxury body creams." [WWD]
• Famous recluse/corset-maker Mr. Pearl on his wares: "To me, a corseted body, with the shape of the indentation at the waist, is beauty in extreme; it represents absolute femininity....Breathing does become a problem, but it does not affect digestion....It would be interesting if people would consider [corsets], since I believe liposuction and plastic surgery are quite ugly acts by comparison, and the results are not quite as becoming. What a corset lace can do is much more attractive." Spoken like a true man. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Prada made some animated sort film inspired by wallpaper called Trembled Blossoms, and it's showing at Fashion Week. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Rachel Roy is designing a capsule collection for Manolo Blahnik. Moe can tell you that Roy is Damon Dash's wife, but you're going to have to google the meaning of "capsule collection" yourself. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Former supermodel Eva Herzigova on Valentino: "Do you remember how we would always have to be in full hair and makeup before Valentino would even look at us?" Yeah, we'll miss him. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Still not quite ready to say goodbye to Valentino? Here's how to get the makeup look from his couture show. [BellaSugar]
• The new Versace shoes have red soles. We're assuming Mr. Louboutin is going to be less than thrilled. [Ugh. Because, you know, manufacturing red soles is practically MAPPING THE HUMAN GENOME in the fashion industry. -Moe] [Chic Report]
• English designer Christopher Kane is doing a limited edition lip gloss for Lancome. The packaging is extra-pretty. [Nylon]

Dieters got a new tool Wednesday to help them take off the extra pounds — the first government-approved nonprescription diet pill.

The Food and Drug Administration said the fat-blocking weight-loss pill orlistat, which has been available by prescription, can be sold in a reduced-strength version over the counter.

The new version will be sold as "alli" by GlacoSmithKline PLC. Xenical, the prescription version, is made by Roche Holding AG.

Of course, with any dieting mechanism (remember Olestra?), there's always a chance of, er, anal spillage:

"The Food and Drug Administration said the most common side effect of the product is a change in bowel habits including loose stool and some oily spotting. Eating a low-fat diet will reduce the likelihood of this side effect."

(Take note, Kelly Cutrone)

[CNN]
[Gawker: Who's the Poopy Pants Publicist?]