Jennifer Hudson, for instance: an actual survivor. Which, I guess, entitles her to a futuristic suit of armor, if that's what she wants.


Or, obviously, Liza! Sequins, wigs, and single-name-recognition are true diva hallmarks.


Toni Braxton appreciates the drama of the occasion, even if this does swing a little David's Bridal.


And Kathy and Hoda, obviously, needed to be here. Their getups are deliciously frumpy. And I'm kind of feeling all the virginal white - both seasonally and occasionally inappropriate.


Kathy Griffin is a virtual virgin goddess! No, seriously, I really like this gown.


Paula is, of course, the grand mistress of this whole thing. Her rather elegantly subdued dress is saved from too much quiet good taste by ruby slippers and - are those stockings?


Speaking of quiet good taste - and wigs - Kim Zolciak is actually going much looser than usual in azalea-tinted meringue.


Kelly Clarkson, diva-in-training, looks about as youthful as an operatic diva with a long history of Wagner performances behind her.


Jordyn Sparks also skews a little frumpy. Which, given the event, I'm kind of feeling.


India.Arie sort of looks like she has gold spilling from her breasts. Nice skill to have!


The horizontal wrap on Sheryl Crow's gauzy number isn't terribly flattering - but might have been better with a shoe other than these high-cut booties.


If you're dressing around a generous bust, like Sheri Shepherd, tight and one-shouldered isn't really the most flattering option, as it results in the dreaded sling effect.


Adele, embryo diva, continues her run as one of the best-dressed women on the proverbial red carpet of life.


You know who don't qualify as divas? Whitney Port and Lauren Conrad. That said, I'm glad they made a sequin effort.


Also: Miley Cyrus. And her dress is terrible. The end.
[Images via Getty]

The Good:
I've a few qualms about the fit of Shoshanna Lonstein Gruss' skirt at points, but as a rule I do think she designs very well for curves - which is to say, her own figure.


Tory Burch does another sort of classic safe chic altogether: the Canvas for Jewels!


Helen Lee Schifter's Cassini-esque floral is, sadly, one of the few touches of whimsy. And as such may be controversial!


The Bad:
Oh dear, Hoda's frock does her lovely figure no favors!


Meanwhile, Kathy Lee could use a touch more structure, a dash more modernity, and, while we're at it, a completely different palette! Silk charmeuse is rarely commensurate with dignity.


Muffie Potter Aston does saloon madam by way of Oz - oddly looks completely appropriate for a society ball. And in truth the more I look, the more I love.


What Say You?
Okay, we saw Andrea Mitchell in a long version of this earlier in the week. What do we think of Jamee Gregory's country club special?


On the one hand, Jill Zarin's bodice is pulling and the gown puts one in mind of Fonda-era aerobics. On the other, do you like the defiance?

[Images via Getty]

#15 Kathie Lee Gifford



Why she's ridic: She makes silly faces; she has managed to transform Hoda Kotb from an award-winning journalist of Egyptian descent into a yenta; she's not joking about that music career of hers.
That's what she said: "I don't think I should be held responsible for anything I don't know about." - In regards to employing sweatshop children for her Wal-Mart clothing line
Why she's fun:

#14 Diana Ross



Why she's ridic: She jiggled Lil' Kim's bare boob on live TV—'nuff said.
That's what she said: "Just because I have my standards they think I'm a bitch."
Why she's fun:

#13 Tara Reid



Why she's ridic: She repeatedly gets shitty, cheap plastic surgery; she is the go-to cautionary tale for party-loving starlets; 80% of the time, you can see where the extensions are attached to her head.
That's what she said: "I wish all the mean people, if you want to be mean to each other, just buy a country together and blow each other up. Then we’d have no terrorists left. Like, don’t kill innocent people for no reason. It’s not fair. We love everybody. We’d even like them if they said they’re sorry. It’s not fair that innocent people are getting hurt. It makes me sad." - Her thoughts on terrorism and world peace from her sorely-missed travel show Taradise
Why she's fun:

#12 Kathleen Turner



Why she's ridic: She sounds like the personification of an ashtray full of cigarette butts when she talks; she pissed off Nicholas Cage after she accused him of stealing a dog; she didn't correct rumors of being a drunk because she didn't think that being known as a drunk would hurt her career.
That's what she said: "I find the idea of today's icons being teenagers incredibly uninspiring."
Why she's fun:

#11 Bai Ling



Why she's ridic: She loves to sing; she loves to dance; she can spend the day crying, but be damned if she won't pick herself up by the bootstraps, go out to a porn star's birthday party and work the red carpet.
That's what she said: "My name is Bai Ling. That means white spirit, and I really feel like sometimes I'm not existing."
Why she's fun:

#10 Celine Dion



Why she's ridic: She doesn't seem to eat; she's very French Canadian; she tried to be fashion-forward once.
That's what she said: "I've never been cool, and I don't care." - Regarding her adult contemporary radio success
Why she's fun:

#9 Elizabeth Taylor



Why she's ridic: Larry Fortensky; Michael Jackson; pills — lots and lots of them.
That's what she said: "The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues."
Why she's fun:

#8 Keyshia Cole's Birth Mom Frankie



Why she's ridic: Frankie is a former crack addict who gave birth to Keyshia Cole. Keyshia was mostly raised by her foster mom and both women remain in her life and, thankfully, her BET reality show Keyshia Cole: The Way It Is. Frankie always speaks her mind, although some of might not make much sense. But she's relatable, since two of her favorite things are "eating Popeye's chicken and watching horror movies."
That's what she said: "I was smoking like a broke stove. Crack. For real." - In regards to why she was in prison, from this outtakes interview from the second season of Keyshia Cole: The Way It Is
Why she's fun:

#7 Mariah Carey



Why she's ridic: She met her much-younger husband at the Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards; she has likened herself to a mermaid on several occasions; a few titles from her discography are Daydream, Butterfly, Rainbow, Glitter, Charmbracelet, and E=MC².
That's what she said: "I don't mind being compared to Whitney, there are people miles worse to be compared to."
Why she's fun:

#6 Liza Minelli



Why she's ridic: She married at least two gay men; she had the most awesome bridal party ever assembled; she says her "esses" weird, making them sound like "shh."
That's what she said: "I feel like I haven't done my best work yet."
Why she's fun:

#5 Paula Abdul



Why she's ridic: She managed to get six #1 Billboard Hot 100 hits out of that excuse for a singing voice; she explained her "quirky" behavior by admitting she has a chronic pain condition; she continues to appear on live television despite being very unpredictable.
That's what she said: "When people expect me to go right, I'll go left. I'm unpredictable. "
Why she's fun:

#4 Courtney Love



Why she's ridic: She took heroin while pregnant; she had a crack bender a few years ago; she still manages to say some of the most intriguing, insightful, intelligent things.
That's what she said: "Drugs make you make bad fashion choices." - From her anti-drug PSA
Why she's fun:

#3 Janice Dickinson



Why she's ridic: She slept with her friend's boyfriend when she was a model; she won't let her beef with Tyra Banks die; she talks about her sobriety as though it's something she actually maintains.
That's what she said: "Without gay men, I am nothing."
Why she's fun:

#2 Anna Nicole Smith



Why she's ridic: Born in a poor Texas town, met her baby daddy fried chicken establishment, met her billionaire husband at a strip club, took off her clothes for money, fled the country with her slimy lawyer, and is now, in death, somewhat of a legend.
That's what she said: "It's very expensive to be me. It's terrible the things I have to do to be me. " - Testimony on the stand during the case battling for her dead husband's fortune
Why she's fun:

#1 Whitney Houston



Why she's ridic: In an interview, she told Diane Sawyer to produce receipts to prove she is spending money on crack, as though crack dealers provide that kind of documentation; she managed to stay married to Bobby Brown for a considerable amount of time; she hung out with Ariel Sharon in Israel and wouldn't shake his hand, for reasons unknown.
That's what she said: "Hell to the no!" - In regards to anything she's not in favor of
Why she's fun:

Related: Young Rapper With A Plan: Lil Mama Tries To Move Up From Makeup [NY Times]