Natalie Portman on Marie Claire

Representative Quote:

She got to spend three months in France when she was 11, shooting The Professional, and on her days off her mother would take her to Monet's house in Giverny and encourage her to come home and paint a version of what she'd seen. When she traveled to Japan for the premiere of The Professional, her parents insisted on a week off to explore the country. Portman shrugs: "OK, so I didn't really go to high school parties," she says, "and yeah, I didn't touch pot till I was in my 20s. I didn't get flat-out drunk until I went to college. But I think that's a good thing in many ways."

Most Immediately Annoying Cover Line:

"Diet Or Exercise: Which Sheds The Pounds Faster?"

Largest Number On The Cover, And What It Refers To:

275. Which is either the number of brain cells you will shed reading "WHAT'S SO BAD ABOUT BONKING THE BOSS?", or the number of Fabulous Finds To Start The New Year you, mere female, will need to get him in a bonking mood.

Britney Spears on Elle

Elle's Lady Gaga cover might be getting all the attention — but the January issue is actually hitting newsstands with a second cover, featuring Spears and her sons. Golf claps for Britney, everyone! Last time she tried to do an Elle shoot, something terrible happened.

Representative Quote:

Elle's Spears profile is not yet online, so let's nab another quote from Marie Claire.

A little-known fact about Portman is that for her very first acting job — as an off-Broadway understudy — she replaced Britney Spears. Needless to say, their paths have diverged wildly since then

Most Immediately Annoying Cover Line:

"DO YOU EXERCISE TO EAT? HERE'S A BETTER WAY."

Largest Number On The Cover, And What It Refers To:

175. The speed, in miles per hour, which this magazine might reach if you dropped it off a very tall building. Which would be more educational than reading about the BEST NEW SHOES, JACKETS, AND BAGS.

Lady Gaga on Elle

Representative Quote:

"I get all the symptoms of a pregnant woman. I get headaches, I get tired, I get blurred vision sometimes during a really intense session with [her creative team] the Haus."

WHEN WILL YOU PEOPLE UNDERSTAND THAT THIS WOMAN IS JUST PREGNANT WITH CREATIVITY?!

Most Immediately Annoying Cover Line:

See above.

Largest Number On The Cover, And What It Refers To:

See above.

Sarah Jessica Parker on Glamour

Representative Quote:

SJP: I still will not wear turtlenecks.

GLAMOUR: Why not?

SJP: I feel like I'm having a panic attack in them. I'm so short that the little bit of height I have is taken and consumed by the turtleneck. My son won't wear them, either!

Most Immediately Annoying Cover Line:

"SO TRUE! Why The Happiest Women Aren't Perfect."

Largest Number On The Cover, And What It Refers To:

50. Could that be the number of Your Most Private Questions that you could Answer, right now, by reading Wikipedia.

Scarlett Johanson on UK Harper's Bazaar

Representative Quote:

This comes from the mouth of Bono, who is interviewed alongside Johanson, because she wears (PRODUCT) RED clothing in the accompanying fashion shoot:

"I don't give a shit how things look anymore. I just want to get the results, get the cheque signed. If it takes me looking like a totally unhip white messiah, I don't care. You do whatever it takes to get people what they need to survive. For me, it was coming home that was the hardest. Coming back to my privileged life. I used to find that really difficult. It's hard when you find yourself in such a harsh juxtaposition with somebody who's fighting for their life. It used to make me feel more awkward than it does now, being this rich rock star next to a starving African."

Most Immediately Annoying Cover Line:

Strangely, none. (The standard beauty and fashion stories look exceptionally inoffensive, or unexceptionally offensive.) Although as hard as it is to take a half dozen pages of Johanson nursing a bad case of sexyface in leopard print clothing, it's pretty odd that the cover implies she and Bono would bond over a serious consideration of music.

Largest Number On The Cover, And What It Refers To:

2010, which is the year you might finally itemize your charitable donations for tax purposes, and briefly consider writing off the cost of Johanson's Tom Waits album. Since listening to it was clearly an act of charity on your part.

Kate Hudson on US Harper's Bazaar

Representative Quote:

"With a hot new movie and major-league man, Kate Hudson seems anything but normal. But the bubbly blonde is just like the rest of us (with fancier clothes, of course)."

Major League! Get it? Get it? No, she really doesn't say anything about A-Rod:

Isn't she moving fast? "People don't know where I'm moving," she counters good-naturedly. "They're just reading psychobabble in these [tabloid] magazines." Even when confronted with the evidence — a picture of her kissing A-Rod — she gamely holds her ground. "There's a guy that's shooting probably 60 frames a minute. That was a sideswipe on the cheek. That wasn't even a kiss." So she's not in love with this guy? "I quickly kissed the cheek," she maintains. "And I remember one of the headlines the next day said, MAKEOUT SESSION. What is wrong with people?

Hahaha, she didn't actually specify "tabloid" magazines.

Most Immediately Annoying Cover Line:

Harper's Bazaar on this side of the pond is totally deficient in this category, too. "Get Gorgeous Hair" — much as our credulity doesn't stretch to believing such a thing could ever result from the use of ridiculously priced products — just doesn't raise my hackles.

Largest Number On The Cover, And What It Refers To:

562. Either New Ideas to Update Your Look (again!), or Things You Might Make If You Treated This Issue Like An Origami Project.

• Jon Gosselin attempted to make peace with Kate Gosselin at a divorce arbitration hearing yesterday by bringing roses to the courtroom. Kate turned them down, "but in the end it all came together and concluded on a happy note." [People]

• According to Jon's lawyer, Mark Heller "it's possible" that The Gosselins divorce could be finalized by the end of the year. [People]
• According to ABC, production has temporarily stopped on Courteney Cox's show Cougar Town "in order for Courteney to deal with a private family matter." [People]
• Whoops! Michael Phelps allegedly owes $23,289.16 in back taxes to the State of California. [TMZ]
• "My old agent used to promote me as the male Keira Knightley. (Laughs) I thought: ‘Well, what does that say about me exactly?' Do I pout a lot or something?"-Robert Pattinson [Mirror]
• Melanie Brown, aka Scary Spice, says that she hasn't completely ruled out posing for Playboy: "Playboy are always asking me to pose for them. They've asked me on and off for the past five years, which I'm really flattered by, but it's all about timing and right now it's not the right time. But I definitely haven't ruled it out." [Mirror]
• One of Seth Meyers' ways of winding down on Sundays after a long night at SNL is to call his parents: "I've called them every Sunday since I went away to college," he says, "We started this family football pool when my brother and I were, like, 9 and 7; I guess they felt it was a key thing, to teach us the building blocks of gambling at a young age. Or maybe they figured it would always give us a reason to call home. I lost $10 last week." [NYTimes]
• "Not too long ago. my mum ran into one nun at home, who'd known me, and the nun told her, 'Oh my God, I watched the "She-Wolf" video, and Shakira looks phenomenal in it! I love how she looks, how she does the splits, and how flexible her legs are.' This was an 80-year-old nun. Times are changing."-Shakira [Guardian]
• Jennifer Aniston eats french fries. Is it because she's lonely? Because Angelina Jolie "stole" her husband away? Because she desperately wants a child?! Or maybe, just maybe, she eats fries because—gasp!—she likes them?! [E!]
• John Travolta thanked his neighbors in Ocala, Florida at a recent screening of his new film, Old Dogs, for the support they showed his family after the death of his son, Jett: "We know that we have a community. We know that we have friends. And we know that we are loved. We appreciate it. Jett appreciates it. We love you, Ocala." [People]
• Jay-Z reportedly "refused to be photographed with the Victoria's Secret models for fear of upsetting his wife, Beyoncé. [PageSix]
• Sean "Diddy" Combs spent $3 million on his 40th birthday party, which included a "$30,000 orchid display." [PageSix]
• Mariah Carey has also been a big spender lately, reportedly dropping £750,000 during a recent four-day trip to London. [DailyMail]
• New Moon took in 72.7 million dollars at the box office on Friday, breaking the one-day record set by The Dark Knight in 2008. [Yahoo]
• According to Entertainment Weekly, Lady Gaga's performance at the American Music Awards this evening "appears to be her most far-reaching live effort yet, as though she took a look at that bizarre gyroscope dress-to-piano transition she rather botched on Saturday Night Live and said, "Yeah, but what if we made it even harder for me to get to the keyboard?" [EW]
• Stop the presses: Victoria Beckham took her children out for frozen yogurt! And one of them had a tantrum! But then she gave him a talking to! And then everyone got yogurt! Huzzah! [DailyMail]
• "I don't want to be a sex symbol. I'm a geek. Anyway if I was naked on screen it would not be titillating."-Simon Pegg [Mirror]
• Gayle King, whose previous talk show attempt flopped in the ratings, may get a second chance at a talk show after Oprah Winfrey's show goes off the air in 2011. [PageSix]
• "I think there's some artists that are really focused on the music and the artistry, but I also think being a showman and being an entertainer is more than just being a musician. It's everything-it's something to look at and to listen to."-Adam Lambert [JustJared]
• "He has to be good in bed and the size matters. The inner beauty counts as well, but without a toy it doesn't make it fun. Right now I don't want to have a serious relationship, I want to have fun. I love flirting at the moment. I'm single and I'm enjoying my freedom. But I don't give my phone number out that often. But if I'm dating, I check the boy from the top to the bottom."-Rihanna [ShowbizSpy]
• "The day my Britain's Got Talent audition was shown on TV life changed for ever. I was sitting at home watching the show alone. Then, when I came on the telly, I heard shouting outside my window. My neighbours were outside jumping for joy, screaming and and shouting. We ended up having a bit of a street party."-Susan Boyle [Mirror]
• "I'm in the know because I did courses. I like to be known as me, first of all – that's the problem with being associated with any religion. Different things in Scientology have helped me become even more of an individual, not a blind follower. People are like: "What? I thought they steal your money." Nobody's stealing my money."- Juliette Lewis [Guardian]
• Michael Jackson's famous Moonwalk glove was sold at auction yesterday for $350,000, far above its original estimate of $40,000-$60,000. [Yahoo]
• Amy Winehouse is planning on getting a nose job. "Amy's become totally obsessed with surgery since her boob job," says a source, "She wants her nose made smaller to fit with her small face as she hates the fact her nose is so big and she doesn't like the shape. Amy says she can barely look in the mirror at the moment as she hates it so much. She's booked in for January but is pushing to get it done sooner. Her family are dead-set against it and her brother has gone mad at her saying it will ruin her whole look and she will become unrecognisable. They're trying to talk her out of it but Amy's having none of it." [Mirror]
• "Jake is the kind of guy who can do a spot-on impression of someone you work with that will make you giggle. He plays guitar and has a great voice. Kids and dogs love him. He loves his mom and sister and girlfriend. He's perfect. Too bad he's ugly."-Natalie Portman on Jake Gyllenhaal [JustJared]

[Image via INFDaily.]

• And now, the cold, hard, retail reality sets in: Neiman Marcus and Net-A-Porter are dropping Ungaro for Spring. Barneys and Saks also aren't ordering. Lindsay Lohan and Mounir Moufarrige, what have you wrought! [Style.com]

• Ashley Tisdale does not yearn for a clothing line. "I've started a production company; I guess that's kind of my clothing line," says the actress. [WWD]
• The incredible Alexander McQueen shoes — both the bulbous hoof ones, and the ones that look like some piece of anthropomorphic weaponry out of eXistenZ, which Lady Gaga wore in the video for "Bad Romance" — are apparently a hit. The designer says he's been inundated with calls from women wanting to buy the so-called "Alien" shoes, albeit some who are interested in them as art pieces. The process by which the shoes are made is protected by copyright, says a spokesperson for the brand. No word on whether a commercial version will be produced for wide sale; McQueen is mulling a charity auction for the runway samples. [Grazia]
• Carlos Falchi's line of handbags for Target is in stores now through December 27th. The designer says, if he didn't have his current job, "I'd like to be a Brazilian cowboy." [TFI]
• Victoria Beckham's people are denying the rumors she is planning, with Simon Fuller, to open a modeling agency — perhaps a U.S. branch of Storm, in which Fuller holds a controlling stake — in New York. "There is absolutely no truth in the story regarding Victoria Beckham and Simon Fuller opening a modeling agency in New York," says her spokesman. "Victoria is concentrating all her efforts on her fashion line and her family." [Vogue UK]
• Daniel Lalonde, president of Louis Vuitton, basically confirmed Lara Stone will be the face of the spring campaign. [The Cut]
• Betsey Johnson is redesigning her stores. Gone will be the hot-pink walls, replaced with white walls and checkerboard floors, to better display the clothes. [Racked]
• Dooney & Bourke co-founder Frederic Bourke has been sentenced to 366 days in prison and a $1 million fine for his role in a failed scheme to bribe Azeri officials into privatizing Azerbaijan's oil company, which would have essentially deprived the country of profits from its greatest national resource. Bourke is appealing. [WWD]
• Model Karmen Pedaru spent a year as goalie on an Estonian national soccer team. [W]
• Funny, the only item this list of How To Look Like Gisele Bundchen is missing is: being born to look like Gisele Bundchen. (OK, so Nars Orgasm is bog standard by now, but $475 moisturizer? Come on.) [Blackbook]
• The BHV — pretty much the most awesome department store in Paris — is getting Beth Ditto and Jean-Charles de Castelbajac to do its holiday windows. Meanwhile, stately old Printemps has Natalia Vodianova. [WWD]
• The British Fashion Council will give an award to the winner of a public vote on who best "embodies the spirit of London." Nominees include Alexa Chung, Kate Moss, and Vivienne Westwood. [BFC]
• Jeffrey Monteiro might be taking over as head designer at Bill Blass. [WWD]
• Liz Lange is launching a lifestyle shopping site, apparently kind of like Gilt crossed with Daily Candy. [Crains]
• People are trying to save Luella on the Internet. [Fashionista]
• The Gossip Girl timeline is apparently now forever divided by the caesura of the Threesome; say Before The Threesome or After The Threesome, and everyone immediately knows what you mean. The boys on the show have been wearing a lot of Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen's line, Elizabeth & James, People notes. [People]
• Jason Wu is doing a capsule collection for Tse this spring. [WWD]
• Anthropologie is the most profitable of the three Urban Outfitters brands, quarterly results reveal. [TS]
• Marie Osmond is licensing her name to a fashion and home decor line. Every last piece in the Marie Lifestyle Collection will retail for under $100. Expect to see it in stores later this month. [UPI]
• Donna Karan's West Indies home is currently making us cry bitter tears of envy from our very black souls. [SB]

I've always liked the name Kate. It has a take-no-prisoners shortness and efficiency — I envision Kate walking down a major street in a big city, wearing cigarette pants and stylish ankle boots, with her head in the game and her eyes on the prize. Katherine may dither, Kathy may chirp, but Kate speaks in a serious, matter-of-fact voice, and when she speaks, you listen. Often, when I think about names, I think about high school, but I can't imagine Kate before she had her own apartment (studio; well-appointed but not ostentatious; clean) or her demanding yet extremely cool job (architect; investigative reporter; corporate detective; spy?). Kate doesn't have a lot of time for friends, but when you manage to catch her in town (she travels a lot for work), she gives great advice. And she tells a great story, although you always know there's a better story she's not telling. Kate could star in a modern-dress production of The Taming of the Shrew — except that in the final act, she'd tell Petruchio where to shove it.

But there's also a dark side to Kate. She's so cool and successful it can make her stuck up. She's not a mean girl, and she's not interested in shit-talk or gossip, but she might not have compassion for people less together than her. Sometimes she just doesn't understand how you could date that guy, or that girl, or why you lost your job when she just got a promotion. This aspect of Kate I can imagine playing out in high school — she's the girl who couldn't see why everyone didn't get an A on the bio test, since it was so easy. Kate doesn't take pleasure in other people's pain, but she has no appreciation for messiness in life, and if you're a little bit of a mess, she has no time for you.

Famous Kates don't necessarily bear out my vision of the name. Kate Moss, whom I consider the iconic Kate, certainly dresses like one. She has the badass aspect of Kateness down, but she's also no stranger to messiness. Kate Winslet just seems too lushly gorgeous — and also too down-to-earth — to fit my image of the somewhat unforgiving Kate. Cate Blanchett might be closer — that angular, ethereal face looks like it could deliver some harsh judgments. But Kate Bosworth seems the closest to the ice-queen version of Kate, especially since her enthusiasm for horseback-riding adds a little upper-crustiness to her image.

Kate hit its peak of popularity — #97 in the US — in the 1880s, and it seems like a pretty good name for a Victorian lady, especially the kind who plays the piano and paints and knows three languages and looks down her nose at you if you use the wrong fork. The name fell all the way down to #843 in the fifties — maybe those traditionalist times favored less hard-driving names for women. Now the name has rebounded to #139, but if you're a Kate, you probably don't give a shit. You're probably not even reading this — after all, you have a plane to catch.

Kate [Wikipedia]
Kate (popularity) [The Baby Name Wizard]

Earlier: J Is For Jennifer, The Vanilla Of Names
I Is For Isabel, Who's Snooty, But Earns It
H Is For Hillary, A Barrel Of Laughs
G Is For Grace - What's That Up Her Sleeve?
F Is For Francesca, And I Wish I Were Her
E Is For Emily, Who Seems Sweet (At First)
D Is For Danielle (Or Dani, Who's Apparently Kinda Judgey)
C Is For Courtney, Who's Too Cool For School
B is for Beth (And Barack! And Bandana!)
A Is For Anna: What My First Name Says About Me

• Lindsay Lohan accidentally ruined a cake at a Victoria's Secret party, as she thought the cake was actually a giant perfume bottle. "She accidentally poked a hole right in the middle of it." says a source. Team Pie shenanigans! [PageSix]

• Meanwhile, Michael Lohan is furious that the judge at Lindsay's recent probation hearing didn't order his daughter to go to rehab: "She needs to put my daughter in rehab," Lohan says, "How could that judge have let her just walk in to court and walk right back out? The least they could have done was give her a drug test at the door." [RadarOnline]
• Dina Lohan however, just used her Oh Snap Flowchart on Michael, releasing this statement: "Michael Lohan needs to focus on being a parent, paying child support, of which he is six months behind, and making up for all the years he was an absentee dad," Dina says, "And stop going on national television talking about his children publicly."
  Lindsay, meanwhile, is reportedly considering taking a restraining order out against her father. [People]
• Mickey Rourke allegedly is "fascinated with the Mafia" and once "created his own crew in a "male-bonding ceremony" in Los Angeles with 13 friends who swore allegiance to one another." [PageSix]
• Renee Zellweger and Bradley Cooper were spotted together in Vancouver, and according to DJ Leanne who dined at the same restaurant as the couple, ""Renée was very happy. She was laughing, smiling. They were very cute. They were definitely having a good time and seemed happy." [People]
• Stephanie Santoro, former nanny to the Gosselins (who also claims she hooked up with Jon), says that the Gosselin kids love filming Jon and Kate Plus 8, and that Jon Gosselin is on a monstrous power trip right now. All he does want out of everything is control. He wants to be in control of everything in his life," she said, "including Kate." [LATimes]
• "I was pretty upset. I don't like to think of him sitting in a prison cell. But I wouldn't comment upon it because it's a very complicated issue, you know? It seems odd. He's been living in Switzerland for years and I've visited him there, so this is all very strange."- Ewan McGregor on Roman Polanski [LATimes]
• Kiera Knightley, Amy Winehouse, and Nicole Kidman all all being considered to play Dusty Springfield in an upcoming biopic. [DailyExpress]
• "I don't see it as being from a misogynistic point of view. On the contrary, I don't find any hatred there. For me, the woman character was him. I felt I was playing him. The vulnerability of that woman is Lars."-Charlotte Gainsbourg on her role in the controversial film, Antichrist. [LATimes]
• "It's funny, because I haven't had one ounce of Botox or any of that. I finally got gray hairs in the past couple years, and I wore it on ER, but they made me cover it up in this show. I don't want to be one of those weird-looking guys who gets old but stays looking young."-John Stamos on his youthful appearance [TheAdvocate]
• "I'm old. It's an interesting thing to watch yourself grow older on screen. I was watching Up In The Air and I thought, 'Jesus, who's the old gray-haired guy?' And it was me. I never wear makeup for movies and now it's starting to show."- George Clooney [Telegraph]
• Busta Rhymes has been ordered to pay $75,000 to a man he assaulted in 2003. [UPI]
• Jermaine Jackson's ex-wife, Alejandra Jackson, claims that Jermaine owes $35,550 in court-ordered child support. [TMZ]
• Kim Kardashian's was robbed last night; the robber made off with several pieces of jewelry, including a Cartier watch. [TheSun]
• Megan Fox was crowned "Best Sci-Fi Actress" at the Spike TV Scream Awards last night. [DailyMail]
• "Most of my humor is how totally ridiculous I am. I can find endlessly funny things about me or our life. The grand statement followed upon stepping in the pile of poo."- Ted Danson [LATimes]
• Real Housewives' star Bethenny Frankel is engaged to boyfriend Jason Hoppy. "It feels great, because I'm with the right person," Frankel says. [People]
• Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson are rolling their eyes at this right now, according to a source who says the pair "never used to pay attention to what was being written about them in the media but in recent weeks, they've become fascinated by it. They're obsessed with Googling themselves to find out what the bloggers and fans are saying about them. They find all the rumors hilarious!" [ShowbizSpy]
• Madonna is currently being sued by neighbors in her Central Park apartment building, who claim Madonna is using the space to rehearse and subjecting them all to "blaring music, stomping and shaking walls," for three hours a day. [Mirror]
• Are Madonna and Guy Richie getting back together? A source says maybe possibly who knows: "The pair of them have huge egos so, rather than speaking directly to one another, they are using friends to relay information. The truth is both Guy and Madonna are becoming more and more open in their admissions that in many ways they regret getting divorced." [ShowbizSpy]
• "When I'm singing in the studio, I have an image in my mind of sitting at a table with somebody and they're sitting right across from me and I'm telling them something," he says. "There's a lot of music and a lot of people out there who can tell you how they feel, but if you can tell somebody how they feel and they didn't realize it until you told them, then you've got something." -Tim McGraw [WashingtonPost]
• Hugh Jackman's people are reportedly pushing the actor to turn down a second stint hosting the Oscars, as "he's a movie star, not a song and dance man." [DeadlineHollywood]
• Sting's wife, Trudie Styler calls him "Pookie," because, as Sting explains, "Pookie means magic mushroom. It's because we used to take so many when we were younger." [TheSun]

• Elijah Wood and Shirley Manson star in a new ad campaign for Oliver Peoples Spring 2010 Resort Collection. Hate to say it, but in this Mad Men-inspired campaign, both come across as a poor woman's Joan & Don. [Black Book]

• According to Paula Sutter, Diane von Furstenberg is "a techy." "She's constantly looking at new technologies. We have a lot more to do there," she said at a recent conference. [WWD]
• In response to the recent terrorist attacks in Mumbai, fashion industry members have come together to create a new book, titled To India, With Love. Contributors include Yves Carcelle, Diane von Furstenberg, Evelyn Lauder, Silvia Fendi, Matthew Williamson, Rachel Roy, Kenneth Cole, Tory Burch and Cynthia Rowley. Natalie Portman, Wes Anderson, Adrien Brody and Elizabeth Hurley are also involved. [WWD]
• Marks and Spencer model - and former WAG (American translation: former wife or girlfriend of an athlete) - Noemie Lenoir had a slight wardrobe malfunction while she was on stage at a charity auction. The back of her dress came unzipped, revealing some very small underwear, but she shrugged and let the bidding continue. [Daily Mail]
• Rory Tahari, wife of designer Elie Tahari, is publishing a book on getting organized, which will include chapters on weddings, children, divorce, and even death. [Observer]
• Gucci will be the main sponsor of the European Equestrian Masters, an international horse jumping show. This will be Gucci's first equestrian funding in 20 years, but the luxury brand has a long history with the elite sport. [WWD]
• New York State's first lady Michelle Paterson recently got the celebrity treatment from Rachel Roy, who sent out a publicity alert announcing Paterson's recent sartorial choice at a party thrown by New York Post gossip columnist Cindy Adams. [Observer]
• Mark Badgley and James Mischka, the designer team behind Badgley Mischka, may be in talks with the home shopping network. Sources say that they are considering following in the footsteps of Tina Knowles and creating a "lifestyle collection" specifically for HSN. [WWD]
• Further proof that Michelle Obama can make anything a trend: Kitten heels are suddenly all the rage in Milan. Of course, that could be because they are just more practical, but that's not half as interesting. [Black Book]
• The ethereally beautiful clothing of Kate and Lura Mulleavy will be featured in an exhibit at the Smithsonian's Cooper-Hewitt National Design Museum next year. Now you, too, can touch the Rodarte! (Actually, that's probably a bad idea.) [WWD]
• Fancy cotton-shirt brand Three Dots has created a basic white v-neck with built-in shoulder pads. Sorry to spoil the surprise, but it's fug. [Inventor Spot]
• Danielle Vitale, president of Gucci America Inc., has announced a shift in focus for the brand. While they plan to continue to stress the "power and allure of product," Vitale would also like to see a greater focus on customer service and employee satisfaction. [WWD]
• Women in the UK are spending more money on clothes, but buying less, according to analysts. This may mean that more people are turning away from fast fashion and favoring quality over quantity. [Daily Mail]
• Victoria's Secret Angel Miranda Kerr is launching an organic skin care line. We're just glad she's not "designing" clothes. [Sassy Bella]
• To address the dearth of angels caused by the model baby boom, Victoria's Secret has reportedly hired Guess model Jessica Hart. [NY Post]
• 1,500 immigrant workers have been fired from American Apparel in the last month because they had not been granted the legal right to work in the U.S. [WWD]
• Gap Inc. has selected a new agency for their holiday ad campaign. Crispin Porter & Bogusky will replace Laird & Partners, which is a shame, because one of the few things likable about the Gap were those cheerful, winter-y holiday ads. [AdAge]
• Jil Sander on her new line for Uniqlo: "I have always been fascinated by the original concept of high street fashion; by the idea of offering attractive, clean-cut clothes to everyone...If you want to make a real difference in the future of fashion, it makes a lot of sense, to engage in a company that has the power to reach people on a global scale." [Times of London]
• Nike shares rose 4.8% in after-hours trading Tuesday, exceeding Wall Street's expectations. [TheStreet]
• According to sources, an Ajman sheihk has submitted a bid for broke fashion house Christian Lacroix. The new owner would preserve Lacroix's current operations, including couture. [WWD]
• Like Diane von Furstenberg, David Lauren, senior VP of Ralph Lauren, is a self-proclaimed techy. "It's great to see all these brands innovating on the phone. It takes shopping and really makes it a part of your life," he says of the company's iPhone app. [Ad Age]
• Hermes is refusing to comment on whether or not they bought jewelery label Asprey. They have, however, confirmed a collaboration with Monaco-based ship-builder Wally to create a £90 million yacht. We were going to make fun of this, but then we saw the pictures, and... we want to go to there. [Vogue UK & Daily Mail]
• Sources say Sarah Jessica Parker is in talks with Halston to be their next celebrity face. Earlier this month, SJP was photographed on the set of Sex and the City: Not Again in a Halston dress, so that could be a sign. [E Online]
• Although the last thing we need is yet another celebrity fragrance, this ad for Kylie Minogue's new perfume, featuring two versions of her model boyfriend, is pretty awesome. [The Sun]

• A London man found the album from Amy Winehouse's wedding to Blake Fielder-Civil in a dumpster with some photos torn out and Amy's beehive colored in.

• The man said, "I don't know if Amy threw the album away or her ex (did), but my wife said that's what she would do if we ever divorced, so it could have been the actions of an angry woman... Whoever threw it away obviously never wanted to look at that album again." Amy's rep issued a statement that she wanted it back, and the man returned it. [The Daily Express]
• A 44-year-old woman has accused Dr. Phil or sexually molesting her when she was being treated by him and interning for him in the summer of 1985, according to The National Enquirer. "He profoundly affected the course of my life. The world should know this man is a predator and a bully. He shouldn't be telling Americans how to live their lives, how to improve themselves." said the woman. [The National Enquirer]
• Vanessa Hudgens lawyer says she's considering filing criminal charges against websites that publish nude photos of her taken when she was underage. She took the photos herself and believes her computer may have been hacked. [TMZ]
• Tony Curtis claims in his new book The Making of 'Some Like It Hot' that he and Marilyn Monroe had an affair while filming the movie. They were both married to other people, and he says she was pregnant with his child, but miscarried. [The Daily Mail]
• Despite recent rumors that Katherine Jackson is so convinced foul play was involved in Michael Jackson's death she wants a third autopsy done on his body, a family source says, "there is neither a plan nor a need for another autopsy." [E!]
• The Jackson family has finally decided to bury Michael Jackson at Forest Lawn cemetery six weeks after his death. [WENN]
• In a federal complaint filed in New York, DEA agents say Michael Douglas' son Cameron Douglas has moved "pounds" of crystal meth since 2006. He was investigated for three years and allegedly tens of thousands of dollars of crystal meth. Three of his former clients are cooperating with prosecutors in the hope that the sentence for their narcotics convictions will be reduced. [TMZ]
• Miley Cyrus has been granted a temporary restraining order against Mark McLeod, the man arrested on Tuesday for allegedly attempting to stalk her. [TMZ]
• Wrigley's has "formally terminated" their relationship with Chris Brown. When news of his assault on Rihanna originally came out the company just suspended his campaign. [TMZ]
• Many American Idol staffers are excited to see Paula Abdul go according to a "veteran key Idol staff member" who said, "Can't you hear our celebration? We broke out the good champagne tonight." [Chicago Sun-Times]
• Paula says Simon Cowell already misses her and claims she hasn't heard that Nigel Lythgoe of offered her a guest judge spot on an episode of So You Think You Can Dance. [TMZ]
• Some American Idol sources say there's a good chance Paula Abdul will come back to the show next season. [TMZ]
• Victoria Beckham will guest judge one episode of American Idol next season. [The Daily Mail]
• Tom Sizemore was arrested on domestic violence charges after an altercation with a woman in L.A. last night and is still in custody. [TMZ]
• Polish fire emergency services have to approve evacuation routes before Madonna's Warsaw concert can take place. Some Polish Roman Catholics are protesting the concert, which is scheduled to take place during the feast of the Assumption of the Holly Virgin Mary because they say Madonna is anti-Christian. [UPI]
• A lawyer for Samantha Burke, who is having Jude Law's baby in October, responded to an interview request saying, "At this time, Samantha has decided not to give an exclusive story," which Radar thinks is news. [Radar Online]
• Does the following sentence mean anything to you? "Leonardo DiCaprio went on a mad bender in Ibiza last night - with Jodie Marsh's ex-hubby Matt Peacock." We know how to say, "Where is the library?" and "Did Peter Andre cheat on Jordan?" but are still not fluent in British. [The Sun]
• Kid Rock sent over $1,500 to a pizza boy who was beaten by a gang and needed emergency reconstructive surgery after reading about his story in The Cincinnati Enquirer. [The Daily Express]
• Steven Tyler was dancing onstage and fell off the stage at a show in South Dakota. He was taken to the hospital and treated for minor head, neck, and shoulder injuries. Video at the link. [TMZ]
• Kate Gosselin will be on Today on Monday for her first interview since she and Jon Gosselin announced that they're divorcing. [Associated Press]
• On August 15 Alyssa Milano will marry talent agent David Bugliari at a private home in New Jersey. [Radar Online]
• Milla Jovovich and director Paul Anderson will marry on August 22. "It's going to be small," she said, "It's just going to be family and close friends. And it's at our home and it's going to be kind of like Havana/Cuban, like very California-Spanish feeling. It's going to be nice." [People]
• The Jay Leno Show will premiere on September 14 with musical guests Jay-Z, Rihanna, and Kanye West. [Variety]
• Britney Spears will appear at the Teen Choice Awards on Monday night. [BritneySpears.com]
• Kristen Wiig bought a Manhattan co-op from Mad Men and Sopranos director Alan Taylor. [N.Y. Observer]
• In the video at the link RHOA's NeNe Leakes says, "I TiVo a lot of things I'm on. I'm just the bomb," and discusses her love for Anderson Cooper and Maxwell. [Entertainment Weekly]
• In Paul Giamatti's new film Cold Souls he plays "an angst-ridden actor who is also Paul Giamatti and who literally has his soul surgically removed to help him cope with the stress of his career and life." He says of playing a fictional version of himself, "The only time it really struck me as very weird was when someone said my whole name during a scene, and I'd go, 'We should cut and start again because there's obviously a mistake there.' Then I'd remember I was actually playing me." [Reuters]
• Molly Ringwald says of her new twins Roman Stylianos and Adele Georgiana, "You get up with one of the babies and feed and change that one and get the baby back to sleep, and the other wakes up, and then you feed and change that one. It is exhausting, but it's wonderful," [People]
• "My friends love coming over [to my house], because they get fed," says Jennifer Aniston. "It's the best restaurant in town." Her personal chef adds, "Jen's a homebody. It's been so much fun to create a place where everybody feels comfortable, like one big family." [People]
• Sienna Miller says she "probably looked awful" for dating married father of four Balthazar Getty. "I probably seem like not a particularly nice person, not a girl's girl," she said. "I do think sometimes people get morally superior without understanding situations and the situation I got into was not ideal, but it happened and if I could go back and be more responsible, I would." [Us]

Harding is enraged by items like acid-washed denim, shapeless sweater dresses and an oversized cat T-shirt. She argues that if you remember the 80s, like she does, then you'll recall:

For decades, the plus-size fashion desert was one more inescapable message to larger women that we were other, less than, undeserving of the nice things made widely available to women who were closer to the cultural beauty standard — that we were supposed to shut up and take whatever they gave us, because it wasn't like we could ever look pretty anyway…

That's why that stupid cat T-shirt (and related atrocities) feels like such a slap in the face to many of us, after we dared to hope for something different and better. Meet the new fat clothes, same as the old fat clothes.

But the thing is, at least Harding has something to critique. In a time when Ann Taylor has stopped carrying size 16 in its stores and Old Navy has phased out its plus-size section except online, plus-sized shoppers need choices. Maybe Beth Ditto's splangled, '80s leggings aren't for everyone, but for those desiring a cat T-shirt need not feel left out. Harding does concede that it's all about options: "Having real choices when it comes to expressing ourselves through clothing does feel a bit luxurious, even if domino-print leggings don't."

A Slap In The Face To Fat Girls [Salon]
Earlier: Beth Ditto Makes Plus-Size Clothing Fun, Sequined, 80s

• Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick's surrogate gave birth to their twin girls this morning in Ohio. Sarah Jessica and Matthew are at the hospital with the surrogate and released a statement saying:

• "Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick are delighted to announce the healthy arrival of their two daughters. Marion Loretta Elwell Broderick weighed 5 lbs, 11oz and Tabitha Hodge Broderick weighed 6 pounds. Both Hodge and Elwell are family names on Parker's side. The babies are doing beautifully and the entire family is over the moon. [TMZ, ABC News]
• Kate Gosselin's brother Kevin Kreider and his wife Jodi Kreider were so outraged by Kate discussing her divorce on TV that they agreed to do an interview with Radar Online in their home minutes after last night's Jon and Kate Plus 8 ended. Kevin said, "We're just so heartbroken and sad about the announcement they made... an announcement that could be so life-shattering for a young child. It was used to gain ratings without any regard for my nieces and nephews." [Radar Online]
• Miranda Tozier-Robbins, the woman who was allegedly caught peeping into Britney Spears' home, pled not guilty today to charges of trespassing, peeping, and prowling. A pretrial date was is set for July 17. [TMZ]
• Lil Wayne attended a pretrial hearing in Arizona related to drug posession and weapons charges. The judge set another date for August 11. [USA Today]
• Darryl Hannah and others were arrested at a protest in West Virginia against mountaintop removal mining. Protesters were blocking a road near a coal processing plant. [USA Today]
• E! is now a "Speidi-Free Zone." The network won't cover Spencer and Heidi Pratt, "Barring any actual news (e.g., she gets knocked up, he falls off a cliff or-heaven help us-her album goes to No. 1), consider this their very last post." [E!]
• Audrina Patridge stars in a new Carl's Jr. ad. While wearing a gold bikini, she rolls around on the beach and eats a "healthier" Teriyaki Burger. She says, "To look this good in a bikini, I've got to give up, like, everything. But there's no way I'm giving up that Teriyaki burger. I'm totally obsessed. I have to be a little bad." [The Sun]
• While speaking at the National Conference on Volunteers and Service, Matthew McConaughey talked about expecting his second child with girlfriend Camilla Alves. "We are putting after-school fitness and wellness programs into underserved communities nationwide, teaching physical fitness, nutrition education, with an emphasis on daily gratitude for how much or how little we have," McConaughey said, "And now that I'm blessed to be a father myself – I got one at home [Levi] who's 11 months and as you people know, we have another one in the oven, three months – this foundation and its cause means even more to me." [People]
• Though Nick Cannon says wife Mariah Carey isn't pregnant, he's announced that when the day comes he'll be a great dad. "I want to be a father that's all about love," says Cannon. "That's the main thing to get right and at the end of the day it's just about smothering my children with love. The same way I do to my wife!" [People]
• Would you vote for President Jolie? Supposedly Angelina Jolie is thinking of entering politics. "Ange has admitted she's getting bored with Hollywood. She said she's now got her sights set on Washington," says a friend. "She is passionate about people's rights, war and justice and thinks she can get more hands-on and make even more of a difference by getting into politics. She admires Obama and thinks she could make a big difference too if she were in his position." [The Daily Express]
• Eve will appear in two episodes of Glee as a "no-nonsense girls' choir director from a rival school." Whitney Houston was being considered for the part. [Entertainment Weekly]
• According to the annual report of the British Board of Film Classification, several viewers complained about Dame Judi Dench's swearing in Quantum of Solace. "Almost every time Dame Judi swears in a film, regardless of its category, we can expect a number of complaints," said the report. "It seems that she should not use such language." [The Mirror]
• Nick Jonas is meeting with Speaker Nancy Pelosi's office this afternoon on behalf of the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation. [Politico]
• Zac Efron has been signed to star in an untitled "sexy thriller." [The Hollywood Reporter]
• If you want to see some spoilers concerning whether or not Dominic Monaghan will return to Lost, read on: [E!]
• Sam Kinison's widow, Malika Borghese is suing Sam's brother for allegedly forging the comedian's will 17 years ago. She claims he rewrote the will to give himself most of his brother's estate, but she only found out in 2007. [TMZ]
• A coroner has announced that Former Wilco guitarist Jay Bennett died of an overdose of the pain killer fentanyl. He had posted on MySpace that he was getting ready for hip replacement surgery after years of pain. [AP]
• Despite rumors that she was given special treatment in prison, Foxy Brown says, "It was incarceration, not vacation. I only wore the designer clothing I was allowed to have." [The N.Y. Post]
• If you're a great tattoo artist, Megan Fox would like to meet you. "I'm looking for a really good artist," she said, "So if you fancy yourself one, try and find me. Have your people talk to my people, and I'll come see you." [E!]
• Paul McCartney has been telling friends he's confident that he'll live to be 100. "Paul has a hunch he'll still be here to mark his 100th year," says a family source. "At the end of the day he leads a pretty healthy life with a strict vegetarian diet and he exercises regularly. He certainly sees 100 as a reachable target." [The Daily Express]
• Courteney Cox will guest star in an episode of Lisa Kudrow's online comedy series Web Therapy, which is produced by Lexus for their branded entertainment network. Alan Cumming, Steven Weber and Victor Garber will also guest star in the second season. [Brand Week]
• Patti LuPone responded to the New York Times story on her pausing a performance to yell at an audience member who may have been photographing her. She wrote in an email: "I found the tone of your report very snide and feel compelled to write you to ask – what do expect me, or any performer for that matter, to do? Do we allow our rights to be violated (photography, filming and audio taping of performances is illegal) or tolerate rudeness by members of the audience who feel they have the right to sit in a dark theater, texting or checking their e-mail while the light from their screens distract both performers and the audience alike? Or, should I stand up for my rights as a performer as well as the audiences I perform for?" [N.Y. Times]
• Ellen DeGeneres says she and wife Portia de Rossi aren't going to have kids. "We have animals, and we love them. They don't talk back, and they don't explore their vocal chords out in public," said Ellen. "[Portia's] brother and his wife just had a baby girl who's a month old now, and it's fun to be a part of that. But no, I think, you know, we definitely thought about it. And it's something I think most people, as a relationship goes on, explore. But it's just a huge responsibility, and I don't know that that's something we want to take on. We're very happily married without children." [Ok]
• Melissa Auf der Maur says she only recorded background vocals for Courtney Love's solo album Nobody's Daughter because of producer Michael Beinhorn, who worked on the last Hole album, not because the band is reuniting. "Michael Beinhorn and I had an incredible working relationship on Celebrity Skin," Auf der Maur said. "And he called me and asked me if I would sing on [Courtney's] new solo record – which is what I understood it was. And I said 'Yes' because I enjoy working with him and ... well, she and I have a history of making music together. And I'm happy to visit her again in the future." [The Guardian]
• Melissa Leo plays Christian Bale's mom in the upcoming film The Fighter. When asked about her onscreen son's reputation for getting too into his roles, she said, "He does, but that's great. I met him on the airplane to Massachusetts a month and a half ago, before he had met his character Dicky. I watched him meet Dicky and right away saw how [Christian] absorbed him. Then, I saw him again a couple of weeks later when we got together to do work, and the transformation-wow. It has been amazing. It just delights me to see. Acting is so precious to me, and to see someone like Christian who really works at it and enjoys it...He's just amazing." [E!]
• Samuel L. Jackson says the only reason he wasn't in Mamma Mia! is that he wasn't aware his friend Phylida Lloyd was even working on it. He says, "I missed that because a friend of mine actually directed Mamma Mia! And I didn't know it until I saw her last year at the British Film Awards and they won all of these awards. I would have called to be in Mamma Mia! I'm a huge Abba fan." [The Daily Express]

• Police are investigating Lindsay Lohan because she's accused of walking off with the jewels she wore during a photo shoot for British Elle. [The Sun]

• Madonna released a statement through her rep saying, "I am extremely grateful for the Supreme Court's ruling on my application to adopt Mercy James... I am ecstatic. My family and I look forward to sharing our lives with her." [Us]
• Yet another star of I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here has been hospitalized. Janice Dickinson was rushed to a Costa Rican medical facility to treat an undisclosed illness. Previously, Heidi Pratt and Lou Diamond Phillips needed medical treatment. [New York Magazine]
• Jessica Alba will not be charged for putting shark posters all over Oklahoma City earlier this month because no one wants to prosecute her. [TMZ]
• A paparazzi says after taking pictures of Kevin Spacey working on the set of his new film Casino Jack he was thrown into some bushes by crew members and Spacey said, "Don't ever take my picture and fight with the crew." Assistants for the film say that the photographer actually started the incident by hitting a production assistant after he asked him to leave. [The Daily Express]
• Angelina Jolie recorded a PSA to draw attention to World Refugee Day on June 20. Angie says: "Refugees are the most vulnerable people on earth. Every day, they are fighting to survive. They deserve our respect. Please do not forget them. Remember them on this day." [Just Jared]
• News alert: Newly-single Megan Fox "wouldn't rule out" dating a British guy. [The Sun]
• Friends of Usher and Tameka Foster Raymond say their split comes as no surprise. One friend says, "As bad as this is gonna sound, it was never a matter of 'I wonder if they'll divorce,' but more like 'I wonder WHEN they'll divorce.'" Another pal adds, "They peaked before they even got married... Right after it was over, they started to drift apart. [Usher] just wasn't ready to settle down, at least not with her." [People]
• Kelis, who is nine months pregnant, has filed legal papers asking that her estranged husband Nas be order to give her spousal support, child support, and money for all pregnacy-related expenses. She says even though he's rich, he's completely cut her off ans she's out of money. "My survival is based on [Nas'] will at this time. If he does not want to pay for an expense, it does not get paid," says Kelis. [TMZ]
• After cancelling a show on Sunday Susan Boyle will rejoin the Britain's Got Talent tour tonight. "She had one rest day, but she will be back on stage tonight," says a tour rep. [Us]
• John Mayer and friend Rob Dyrdekwere spotted doing tequila shots at a Hollywood club before Mayer gave an impromptu performance. Mayer then Tweeted "In triage at Cedars with @Robdyrdek. When the contents of his stomach hit that silicon bag and we all saw it, we just broke into applause." But a source says it was all a hoax and Dyrdek didn't really have his stomach pumped. [People]
• In this video, Spencer Pratt explains that Jesus saved Al Roker's life, because if he hadn't been recently "saved by Jesus" he would have ripped the anchor head off for being "disrespectful" and "inappropriate" this morning on the Today show. [TMZ]
• For the third time in a week Miley Cyrus' people have had her hang up on a radio interview when a host asked a question that Disney hadn't approved. Miley claimed on her Twitter that, "a station goes over time I am IMMEDIATELY connected to the next station." [TMZ]
• Billy Ray Cyrus says the upcoming fourth season of Hannah Montana will be the last. "Quite frankly, I give a lot of credit to Miley for taking it to another year," said Cyrus. "She didn't want it to just end with whatever was the last episode we did. She wanted it to build to where there's a moral to the story, to where it doesn't just end and go away and that's it. She wanted there to be an official ending to Hannah Montana." [UPI]
• A photo of Robert De Niro and Anthony "Fat Andy" Ruggiano has surfaced, sparking rumors that he met with the late mobster who was involved in at least seven murders to research his role in Analyze This. De Niro says he doesn't recall taking the picture. [The Daily Express]
• T-shirt company Sledge USA wanted Carrie Prejean to model for the company even after she lost her crown, but Prejean didn't bother to show up for the job. [Perez Hilton]
• "Idol champ's lesbian hell." Kelly Clarkson has been single for several years and she says, "Those [lesbian rumours] are not helping me on the dating front! I prefer the boys. I'm extremely flattered when I do get hit on by girls and I think it's hot but I'm not into it. I like boys." [The Sun]
• For his upcoming debut album, Adam Lambert will work with RedOne, the producer behind Lady Gaga's "Poker Face" and "Just Dance." [E!]
• Bloomsbury Publishing released a statement denying allegations that J.K. Rowling copied "substantial parts of a 1987 book called The Adventures of Willy the Wizard — No 1 Livid Land by Adrian Jacobs for Harry Potter And The Goblet of Fire. The statement said, "The allegations of plagiarism made today, Monday 15 June 2009, by the Estate of Adrian Jacobs are unfounded, unsubstantiated and untrue. This claim is without merit and will be defended vigorously." [Reuters]
• Are you dying to hear the new single from Mel Gibson's girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva? You can listen to it here: [People]
• Thandie Newton will teach acting classes at the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls in South Africa. [The Daily Express]
• Kim and Kourtney Kardashian, Kendra Wilkinson, and others have filmed a new commercial for E!'s Drive Safe campaign that promotes having a designated driver. [E!]
• Carnie Wilson gave birth to a baby girl named Luciana Bella on Friday. She is the second daughter for Wilson and her husband Rob Bonfiglio. [People]
• Peaches Geldof was spotted leaving the Scientology Celebrity Center in New York with recruitment documents. [The Sun]
• Jordan and estranged husband Peter Andre have signed a deal to star in rival reality shows that will air at the same time on different networks to play out their divorce in public. [The Sun]
• Prince Ernst August of Hannover, husband of Caroline of Monaco, admitted that he hit a hotel owner in Kenya. A court previously ruled that he was guilty of beating the hotel owner with a metal object, but he says he only hit him with his hands. [CBS News]
• Alice Cooper says he would like to write an operatic movie starring himself. He said if he wasn't a musician he "would probably write movies, but why not put that to music to make an operative thing on stage where you can portray this guy? ... Alice has always been the villain so Alice can easily play this character." [The Star]
• In case you're wondering what it's like to be in the presence of Robert Pattinson, a New York magazine intern risked life and limb to report on the scene around the area where he is currently filming in New York. He says: "I tried to take cell-phone pics, but I was thwarted by packs of girls literally crying... People threw roses at him, took pictures, gasped. He smiled and then had to SPRINT into his trailer. He looked skinnier, paler - yet better! - in person." [New York Magazine]
• "I don't mind getting older; I mind getting uglier. You know – knees, disease, old age, death. I'm a wreck. Frankly, who else cares? No one else does. No one else in the world is out there saying, 'It's a tragedy she's getting older.'
  So why bring yourself down?" — Chrissie Hynde [The Telegraph]
• Bruce Willis is half-naked in most of the photos for his new W magazine shoot with Emma Heming, but that wasn't the original plan. He explains, "When we were getting ready to do the shoot and we were talking about the concept, they said to me, 'We see you with a lot of clothes, a lot of layers.' And I said, 'Great!' And they said, 'Emma's going to be scantily clad,' and I said, 'As it should be!' And then we get there and Steven says, 'We're gonna change it up, we'll put Emma in a lot of clothes and we'll have you in less clothes.' And I went, 'I gotta get some weights!'" [W]

• Alec Baldwin is public enemy number one in the Philipines because last week when David Letterman asked Baldwin about his desire to expand his family, he joked:

• "I'm thinking about getting a Filipino mail-order bride at this point...or a Russian one." [E!]
• John Krasinski has befriended his co-star Lake Bell, so clearly he's planning on breaking up with Emily Blunt. A source says, "John and Lake have been flirting like crazy on set. In between takes, they sit next to each other, giggling and whispering like teenagers - he'll play with her rings or she'll rest her head on his shoulder." [Star]
• More sources confirm that Mel Gibson's girlfriend, Oksana Grigorieva is pregnant. Supposedly she's in her second trimester and he's already told his other children. [TMZ]
• A settlement has been reached in screenwriter Benedict Fitzgerald's lawsuit against Mel Gibson over The Passion of the Christ. Fitzgerald claims Gibson understated the film's budget and told him he would not receive any money from the film, but considered it a gift of his faith. [Yahoo]
• Jon and Kate Gosselin plus their eight kids celebrated the sextuplets' birthday on Saturday. Their bodyguard Steve Neild was there, along with TLC's cameras. When shooting was done, Jon and Kate left in separate cars. [E!]
• Stars are checking in on Twitter after Sunday's earthquake in L.A. Miley Cyrus (who was in the Bahamas) Tweeted: "did anyone else feel the earthquake. 5.0!!!" Thankfully, Lauren Conrad is unharmed: " Earthquake!! We were relaxing at home watching TV and the building started rocking. We are fine! :)" Lindsay Lohan kept it short: "Earthquake scared me!" [People]
• Ryan O'Neal has confirmed that there will be a follow up to Farrah's Story that will air on May 15. "We haven't stopped filming and we're going to make a second installment of her life eventually," said O'Neal. [MSNBC]
• Ethan Zohn of Survivor: Africa has a rare form of Hodgkin's Lymphoma and began chemotherapy treatments last week. [People]
• In this clip from Good Morning America, Christian Bale is asked if he has an anger problem and he says that while "John Conner has an anger problem," the incident in which he yelled at co-worker was resolved within 30 seconds in real life. [TMZ]
• While promoting her upcoming musical Nine at Cannes, Penelope Cruz came down with "some sort of food poisoning." She's seeing a doctor and trying to get better before the premiere tomorrow. [People]
• Though Paulina Porizkova said she suspects she was let go from America's Next Top Model because she complained about Tyra Banks' behavior, Banks and a producer released a statement today saying, "America's Next Top Model is not immune to these financially challenging times. We've had to make significant cuts in every area of the production and, unfortunately, Paulina was a casualty of these cuts." [People]
• LeAnn Rimes and her husband Dean Sheremet are selling their Franklin, Tennessee mansion for $7.45 million. There's no word on where they are moving, or if they will both be moving to the same house. [TMZ]
• Wanda Sykes says of calling Rush Limbaugh "the 20th hijacker" at The White House Correspondents Association dinner, "Here's the problem with people who aren't comedians, [who] deconstruct comedy. It wasn't a 9/11 joke. Of course, 9/11 isn't funny, but it wasn't a 9/11 joke." [Politico]
• Kate Walsh's estranged husband Alex Young has been trying to get financial information on Walsh from the ABC network and her accounting firm. The firm asked for a protective order against Young, but a judge has denied it. [TMZ]
• The New Kids on the Block set sail on Friday for a cruise to the Bahamas with 2,000 fans. "I don't know what we were thinking," said Donnie Wahlberg. "We have nowhere to run if it gets out of hand." [People]
• Mary Louise Parker is mad because she had to do a nude scene for Weeds that she did not feel was necessary. "I didn't think I needed to be naked," she said. "I fought with the director about it, and now I am bitter. I knew it was going to be on the Internet: 'Mary Louise shows off her big nipples.' I wish I hadn't done that. I was goaded into it." Co-executive producer Roberto Benabib said, "We felt at that point in her life, defenses had been so thoroughly stripped away. There was a nonchalance to the nudity that informed the scene … I thought it was wonderful, one of the five best scenes Mary-Louise has ever done [on Weeds]." [People]
• Carmen Electra will appear in a week's worth of shows this July in Crazy Horse Paris, a topless cabaret show in Las Vegas. "She's not going topless, but she will be wearing very little. She's going to wear whatever she is comfortable with," says a rep for the show. [People]
• ABC has cancelled Samantha Who? because the show couldn't cut it's budget enough. [Variety]
• Jamie Kennedy was performing at a New York City comedy club this weekend and girlfriend Jennifer Love Hewitt worked the merchandise table selling Kennedy's T-shirts and DVDs. "She took my shirts and bedazzled them," Kennedy says. "She would take regular shirts and put sparkles on them, and we actually sold out of them – people go nuts for them." [People]
• The songwriters behind Mamma Mia! will bring their present their musical Kristina in English for the first time at Carnegie Hall in September. [N.Y. Times]
• Deborah Harry says she's "pro everything you can do to feel better and make yourself look better. I have no qualms about surgery whatsoever. I don't want to look like I've had a load of surgery." [The L.A. Times]
• Mike Viola, who produced Mandy Moore's new album Amanda Leigh says, "It's not the voice on any of her recordings. She's like a soul singer. She really has it-great pitch, great tone, real range, incredible stamina." It was Viola's idea to use Moore's birth name as the title, "because it's almost like starting from scratch. She's trying to make a real artistic record. Good for her! Good for fucking her!" [NY Magazine]
• Taye Diggs and his wife Idina Menzel are both on Private Practice, but they don't play each other's love interests. Diggs said he's OK with his wife making out with Tim Daily on set because he's a good looking man and she deserves it. Menzel replied, "You know what? I do deserve it. Because Taye's always kissing beautiful women on movie sets. About time I got my turn." [NY Magazine]
• Everyone at Cannes is talking about Lars von Trier's Antichrist, which involves a genital mutilation. The film is described as a "treatise on grief and gynophobia" and a misogyny consultant is credited on the film. Some people booed, some laughed, and some clapped at the end of the film. At a press conference von Trier said he made the film because "It's the hand of God... And I am the best film director in the world. I'm not sure if God is the best God in the world." [N.Y. Magazine]

• Rihanna has a new song, with guest vocals by Lady GaGa, titled Silly Boy. Kanye West posted it online, and the lyrics are:

"I said I'm not coming back. You fooled me once but you can't have that ego turning… Cause you had a good girl, good girl, girl. That's a keeper. You had a good girl, good girl but didn't know how to treat her… So silly boy get out my face. Why do you like the way regrets taste?" Maybe I'm old, but the vocals sound like they were performed by a GPS unit on a dashboard. [The Sun]

• Wow. Eminem is flying 200 laid-off Toledo auto workers to L.A. to be on Jimmy Kimmel Live May 15. The idea is to "put a face on" the plight of American auto workers. [Toledo Free Press]
• Tourism peeps in St. Lucia are still glad Amy Winehouse performed, even though her set at the St. Lucia Jazz Festival was cut short because of rain. Uh, didn't she walk off the stage? [Yahoo News via AP]
• Madonna is so over Yankee Alex Rodriguez, she took her kids to a Mets game. Burn! [Page Six]
• Although Brooke Shields is calling Kiefer Sutherland a "gentleman," this report notes that one of his former co-stars claims he would "go to the bar immediately after he'd finish working. He'd sit there for hours, putting them back. When it was time to go home, he'd be cantankerous and ornery. He was not a pleasant drunk." Now he faces a $1,000 fine and a year in jail in L.A. for violating his DUI probation. [Gatecrasher]
• Heidi Klum and Seal renewed their wedding vows in a "white trash" wedding, and reporter Rosemary Black writes, "Why is it still PC to make fun of a huge segment of the Caucasian population that is frequently low income and under-educated?" [NY Daily News]
• Will Kara DioGuardi return for another season of American Idol? Seems like she doesn't even know: "I hope I'm here for another season," she says, "but I haven't been asked yet." [Gatecrasher]
• After his stint on Saturday Night Live, Justin Timberlake had dinner with girlfriend Jessica Biel and father Randy Timberlake, who "seemed really proud of him." Aww. [Page Six]
• A lady who works at a St. Louis beauty salon found the Twilight sequel script in the trash outside of a hotel. She returned the New Moon pages to the studio and has been invited to the premiere. [Breitbart]
• The National Enquirer says that Kevin Federline wants more cash from Britney: He currently gets about $40,000 a month but "can't afford the rent, his help, the food and the booze it takes to keep up (his home)." According to a source. [MSNBC]
• Speaking of Britney, Sam Lutfi may have to pay her legal fees from the courtroom battle over the restraining order; that's about $123,142. Not to mention the $72,292 her lawyers are going to try and squeeze out of Adnan Ghalib. [People]
• How will the show Jon & Kate Plus 8 — the fifth season of which premieres in two weeks — deal with the "scandal" its star, Jon Gosselin is involved in? [MSNBC]
• Oh, no. No no no no. Jennifer Aniston wants to be on Mad Men. "I like Mad Men," says Jennifer. "I would love to be in that, it's great. I love the era. I would love it if they offered me a role." But, but, that's part of the charm! That there are no "stars," except for the ones the show created! Sniff. Sob. [Daily Express]
• These drunk pix allegedly caused the marriage of Katie "Jordan" Price and Peter Andre to disintegrate. The "mystery man" makes my gaydar ping, though. [The Sun]
• On Celebrity Apprentice, Joan Rivers sniped that Annie Duke was "worse than Hitler; Hitler never had PMS." Now Rivers says: "It's just an expression. But I stand behind it." [CNN]
• This paper says Joan Rivers is "forever the comeback kid." [NY Daily News]
• In this video interview from August, Farrah Fawcett talks about her terminal cancer: "It's much easier to go through something and deal with it without being under a microscope. It was stressful. I was terrified of getting the chemo. It's not pleasant. And the radiation is not pleasant. It becomes your life. People call, 'How are you?' 'How do you feel?' 'We're praying for you.' 'Do you still have your hair?' 'What do you feel like?' When every single call is that kind of call… it's all you talk about. It's all-consuming. Then, your quality of life is never the same." [LA Times]
• In this video, Farrah Fawcett's friend Alana Stewart talks about the "cutting edge" treatment FF received in Germany. [ET]
• Ryan O'Neal recalls the moment he knew Farrah Fawcett was really really sick; they were walking on the beach: "We used to take that walk all the time to the rocks and back. And halfway there she stopped and said, 'Can we go back?' And Red and I looked at each other and we knew…" Also, Farrah doesn't realize son Redmond visits the house in shackles, since he is currently serving a jail sentence. "When you go in to her," Ryan tells Redmond, "don't rattle your chains." Ryan told Today's Meredith Vieira, "She doesn't know... she just holds him." [People]
• The Gossip Girl spinoff, possibly now called Lily and not Valley Girls, appears to be BACK ON. [NY Mag]
• Heidi Montag Pratt has a new video, which involves writhing in a bikini. Also breaking: The sky is blue. [Perez]
• In this interview with Depeche Mode, Martin Gore talks about giving up drinking and Andy Fletcher comments on the band's 30th year of being together: "I think at first when we found out it was going to be 30 years, I think it was, 'Oh my God, how embarrassing. We're really old!' But I think now we've really got our heads around it, and I think it's something to be actually proud of." [CNN]
• Yoko Ono has unveiled a John Lennon exhibit at New York City's Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Annex. Included is a billboard featuring Lennon's blood-splattered glasses that marked the 30th anniversary of his death. Ono says: "I thought I might be criticized for it.. But it's very important now for people to understand what violence is about." [USA Today]
• Congrats to SNL star Maya Rudolph, who is expecting baby number 2. [People]
• Ooh, Rachel Weisz is in talks to play one of my faves, Hedy Lamarr, in a flick called Face Value. Lamarr was not only a screen siren but an accomplished scientist; she created a method of changing frequencies which is the key to modern wireless communication — which will be the subject of the film. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Dermot Mulroney will make his directorial debut, Keep It Together, a comedy/drama about "love and divorce." Christopher Walken and Blythe Danner in negotiations to join the cast! [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Scott Speedman is in Atom Egoyan's film Adoration as a tow truck driver: "The guy teaching me didn't realize I was an actor doing it for a movie. He yelled at me up and down. I didn't use a tow double, even though I'm sure they had one at the ready." [USA Today]
• Every anniversary, Tori Spelling's husband slips a new diamond ring on her finger and this year it is a white diamond and a yellow diamond and blah blah blah being rich is awesome. [People]
• Trudie Styler, who co-founded the Rainforest Foundation, flew her hairstylist from New York to Washington, DC, last weekend on a private jet to do her hair and makeup for the White House Correspondents' Dinner. [Page Six]
• Mark Landon, eldest son of Michael Landon, has died at age 60. [Yahoo News via AP]
• The Simpsons stamp could become the nation's most popular stamp, knocking Elvis out of the top spot! [NY Post]
• Blind item! "Which buxom B-list pinup only helps out charities that ply her with cocaine?" [Gatecrasher]
• "How would you like being a young actor walking into a casting agent and the first thing they say is, 'Leave!' " — Liev Schreiber on NPR on the way people used to mispronounce his name. [Page Six]
• "As a mother, you have to read your kids a lot of these books, so it's fun to get involved in the process. I've had such a good time with this. This book is about becoming self aware and that realization in childhood. The title is my nickname, and I hated my nickname when I was seven years old. At that age, I tried to get rid of my freckles and I hated dodgeball - I still hate dodgeball." — Julianne Moore, at a reading of her second children's book, Freckleface Strawberry and the Dodgeball Bully. [WWD]
• "When David and I got to the first shoot we were both standing in our bathrobes, looking at each other and saying, 'Okay, who's going to drop their dressing gown first?' It can be a little intimidating standing half-naked in a studio full of strangers, so it's good to have the support of each other, reassuring and encouraging one another. David is always incredibly supportive of everything I do. I never used to go to the gym before working with Armani – but if you're going to be photographed in your bra and knickers you want to look as good as you can… I still work out every day. I drop the kids at school, and from the school I go to the gym and do the miles on the treadmill. I have worked hard, and if you are going to agree to be photographed in underwear you have to put the hours in, so when you turn up on the day and take off your robe you feel confident that you can do the job. As a 35-year-old mother of three, I'm looking okay." — Victoria Beckham. [The Sun]

• Only one more day of having to listen to designers opine about politics! Marc Jacobs' L.A. windows are "set up with the Republicans menacingly on one side (with a particularly freaky-looking W) and brightly dressed Obama voters/supporters on the other. There's also a gun-toting Palin with a letter posted next to her image, which reads as follows: Dearest Citizens, I believe in, 1) No choice for you gals. 2) Creationism for you kids. 3) No rights for you gays and lesbians. 4) Everyone should own a gun! You gotta believe in something, baby!" [Racked]
• Stella McCartney throws an Obama-themed tea. I guess eating his face is an endorsement. [WWD]
• Meanwhile, Henri Bendel stays neutral: "Today, the store will unveil its bipartisan windows featuring a group of five mannequins dressed in the latest cocktail dresses from Chloé & Reese and Greta Constantine. The girls are flanked by red and blue polling booths, each one representing a political party. Today, each mannequin can be seen with a large question mark above its head, but Wednesday morning, the question marks will be removed and the group will be placed in front of the winning voting booth. Several pounds of confetti will be thrown over the group in celebration of that party’s win." [WWD]

• Rihanna's the face of Gucci's new "Tattoo Heart" campaign, which features, um, tattoo hearts on clothes. Some of the proceeds benefit Unicef. [Perez Hilton]
• The secret of Yves Saint Laurent's success? "He liked women to be beautiful." [Reuters]
• Wanna see a young female moddle in Lagerfeld drag? No? Don't click on this link. [FashionWeekDaily]
• Mod pioneer Mary Quant gets her own stamp! It features a mod bird in a mini and zip-top. [ElleUK]
• Did you know Zac Posen was a classically trained singer? Apparently it's why he's so into opera — hence his Lincoln Center arts leadership award for his commitment to supporting arts education. [WWD]
• Consignment stores continue to clean up. [WSJ]
• Apparently the new Kate Moss tell-all is a great read, even if it boils down to the moddle demanding, "Why the f**k can't I have fun all the time?" [Daily Mail]
• Speaking of models with drug scandals in their (recent) pasts: Rosie Huntington-Whiteley has a new gig as the face of dothegreenthing.com. [Fashionista]
• A moddle we can actually get behind? Alek Wek. "I'm working with my uncle in the Sudan embassy in London to open a secondary school on the Nile in Susan. It would be made up of 50 per cent boys and 50 per cent girls...My father always stressed education. I didn't understand it when I was young but I understand now." [VogueUK]
• Christian Siriano, modest as always: "Also, designing Heidi’s gown for the Emmys was amazing, especially when I went to the afterparty and met Debra Messing. Debra told me, “Oh my God, I love your clothes, you’re a genius!” You never know who’s going to be a fan of your work." [Cosmopolitan]
• The city grounds to a halt as we all get our vote on; the Nylon girls are "Gone Voting!" [Nylon]
• Retail extravaganza Lucky Shops looks undimmed by the economy! Encouraging, or depressing? [FashionWeekDaily]

• Is Ashley Olsen getting married? The National Enquirer thinks so. It'll happen on the French Riviera next summer; she wants Karl Lagerfeld to make the dress and Annie Leibovitz to take the pix. Oh, the hubs-to-be is boyfriend Justin Bartha. [Daily Express]
• Ryan Reynolds ran the NYC marathon! His time? 3 hours and 50 minutes, faster than he anticipated. "It was an incredible experience," he says. He was asked how he'd celebrate and claimed: "I'll probably celebrate by eating my own body weight in raw dough." [People]
• Heh, things were "frosty" between Tina Fey and John McCain on Saturday Night Live. [MSNBC]
• A "crazed" Madonna fan stormed on to the set of Guy Ritchie's new movie and threatened to kill him. The teenager had a knife and was shouting, "I love Madonna." He was arrested, though if he were cast in Guy Ritchie's movie, that would be believable. [Mirror]
• Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt's kids went trick-or-treating in Malibu on Friday. Maddox was a Marine; Zahara was a Jolly Green Giant; Shiloh was a sheriff. Need pix!!! [Star Magazine]

• Ooh, check out Angelina's eyes on the cover of British Harper's Bazaar. [ONTD]
• The head of rap label Def Jam died Saturday: Shakir Stewart, who succeeded Jay-Z as VP in June, committed suicide. [Reuters]
• Daniel Craig talks about his arm: "I tore my shoulder when we were making Casino Royale and it started to ache during Quantum Of Solace. I went to see a surgeon and had reconstructive surgery - I had six pins put in. So now I can't really move my arm and it's a little painful, but I'm having physio every day, and it's healing well." [Daily Mail]
• Lindsay Lohan will have her deposition videotaped in Samantha Ronson's ongoing lawsuit against her former attorney. She has a lot of conditions, though, and wants the transcripts to be destroyed when the case is over. [E!]
• Lindsay was supposed to host the World Music Awards in Monaco next weekend, but she's been replaced by, um, Denise Richards. Downgrade! [Mirror]
• Simon Cowell and girlfriend Terri Seymour: Dunzo. She ended it after 6 years. Want to guess who doesn't believe in marriage? [Newser.com]
• After Terri broke up with him, Simon allegedly said "Thank God! " [Daily Mail]
• Terri wanted kids, Simon did not. [Mirror]
• Simon also says: "You know, the most incredible thing I’ve seen on TV for absolutely ages was the Sarah Palin/Joe Biden debate. I watched it for an hour and there wasn’t one second I wasn’t completely riveted. I would love to bring the concept of the American presidential debate to Britain. I know I could engage the audience, get people involved." [Daily Mail]
• Peaches Geldof walked out of a London store with an item of clothing draped over her arm and didn't pay for it. A shopkeeper ran out and confronted Peaches, who said it was an accident. Apparently this is the fourth time she's walked out of a store without paying for clothes, although it seems like she always has a good excuse. [Mirror]
• Joaquin Phoenix, who is retiring from acting, might be back on drugs: He was "out of it" at a tribute to Paul Newman last week in San Francisco. Grief-stricken, maybe? [Page Six]
• Peaches' husband's band has a new single, "She Loves Everybody," about a controlling, insecure girl who craves affection. [Mirror]
• Amy Winehouse has gained weight and is trying to stop smoking. She's still hooked on sugar, however. [Mirror]
• Oh, wait, Amy Winehouse is back in the hospital. It seems to be related to the chest infection she had last week. Or her emphysema. [People]
• A New Zealand TV journalist is being investigated and might lose her job after a "trainwreck" interview with Pink; it seems the woman's sister used to be Pink's assistant and the reporter ambushed the pop star with questions about why she'd fired her sister. [News.com.au]
• More weird New Zealand news: A pizza chain used a Halloween ad which featured skeletal animations of the Queen Mother, Sir Edmund Hillary and Heath Ledger dancing on gravestones. The company has apologized. [Times of London]
• In case you couldn't already guess, Tyra is endorsing Barack Obama. [Yahoo News]
• Usher is taking a year off from music to travel the world and find "inspiration." Good luck! [Mirror]
• Jessica Simpson's BFF, stylist Ken Paves, had his face bloodied during a paparazzi crush outside of an L.A. restaurant. There were so many cameras swarming that some guy accidentally hit Ken near his eye with a camera. Jess and Ken made it to the car, and went directly to the hospital. [TMZ]
• Bruno, aka Sacha Baron Cohen, crashed a rally banning gay marriage in California. [Yahoo New]
• There was a memorial for Jennifer Hudson's family members, including nephew Julian King, on Sunday. His second-grade teacher read from journals written by his classmates. [AP]
• Melanie "Scary Spice" Brown is renewing her vows in Egypt, but Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham doesn't plan to attend. Snubby spice? [The Sun]
• It appears to be really and truly on between Criss Angel and Holly Madison. If you have a strong stomach, gaze upon this image of them kissing. [TMZ]
• Mindy McCready is out of jail. [E!]
• Here's a video in which Senator John McCain meets Anna Nicole Smith, one of her "biggest fans." [Politico]
• Brad Pitt and Leonardo DiCaprio have Oscar buzz for The Curious Case of Benjamin Button and Revolutionary Road, but Oscar voters tend to like it when actors play real people. [Reuters]
• Nigella Lawson once made her kids give their Christmas gifts to charity. "I wanted them to think about how lucky they are," she explains. Hmm, could work, could make them harbor resentment. [The Sun]
• Bon Jovi's being sued for £250,000 after one of the rock group's entourage allegedly deliberately ran over a woman with a golf cart at a concert. [Telegraph]
• Viggo Mortensen is in a film adaptation of a play about about an ordinary man in 1930s Germany being slowly co-opted by the Nazis. He says the story has relevance today; "You don't need to be some kind of bookworm or political activist; little and big decisions that individuals make in society on a daily basis are what any country is." [LA Times]
• LL Cool J has been inducted into the Long Island, NY Music Hall Of Fame. Didn't know there was such a thing, but, congrats? [UPI]
• Natalie Portman and Rashida Jones have made a very important election-related video you simply must watch. [Funny Or Die]
• Is Sienna Miller's relationship with Balthazar Getty fizzling out? [Mirror, Daily Mail]
• In an op-ed about paparazzi and papers vs. celebrities — especially Sienna Miller, who's gone to court seeking damages for a "campaign of harassment" by photographers, this writer states: "We have no right to invade people's privacy, but we do have a time honoured journalistic tradition of doing so that I would hate to see disappear." [Independent]
• Kylie Minogue would love to be an actress: "I’d love to do a comedy." [The Sun]
• It's weird to think about Dakota Fanning as 14-year-old sophomore and varsity cheerleader in real life, but that is what she is. [USA Today]
• Elle UK asked Kelly Osbourne to be part of a photography portfolio celebrating friendship and love; she decided to do it with her boyfriend. "My boyfriend is my best friend," she says. "We always go shopping together, we like going to music festivals and we chat on the phone a thousand times a day." [Elle UK]
• Haven't heard about these two in a while, but Nelly says he and Ashanti are "serious." They've been on and off since 2003. [People]
• Here's a piece about how stars change shape for films. A former Royal Marine who has worked on the last five James Bond films, has also been training with Jake Gyllenhaal for Prince Of Persia. He says: "Most actors are athletes nowadays. Their fitness is a big factor in whether they get cast or not. Jake has to look like a warrior capable of sword-fighting, not like he's been hitting the gym. He is working out twice, sometimes three times a day, six days a week, for three to four months on top of stunt rehearsals before filming begins." Ready to go back to bed? [Times of London]
• Did Paris Hilton steal Benji Madden from Sophie Monk? This was 8 months ago, if you care. [News.com.au]
• Johnny Carson's former lawyer is calling the Tonight Show host a sad, depressed man who cheated on his wives and was tormented by his mother. Tears of a clown? [Page Six]
• Whoa: Mickey Rourke once planned to kill a man and then commit suicide, because the guy had raped a woman he knew. [The Sun]
• The Pet Shop Boys will be presented with an outstanding contribution to music award at next year's Brit Awards, which means Simon Cowell won't get it. What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this? [BBC News, Mirror]
• The Communist Party of St. Petersburg must not have much to do, because they're pissed at "Bond girl" Olga Kurylenko for "sleeping with the West." [UPI]
• Jean-Claude Van Damme canceled promotional appearances for a film because one of his dogs is in a coma. Tragic! [Page Six]
• "Kate Winslet is always naked, sitting on a toilet, running buck-naked. She's free. I want to be the kind of actress who can really be comfortable with my body like that" — Halle Berry in Elle. [Page Six]
• "I've kept in touch with William — he's really good looking. But I prefer Harry, he's more my type." — Paris Hilton on the Princes. [Mirrror]
• "I need you to make the best sub you have ever made because it's for Snoop Dogg," A "handler" to a Subway employee in Australia. [News.com.au]
• "I've always been a slow starter. My first date was with a girl called Cessi. We had a beautiful relationship over the phone all summer and then when we met I couldn't look her in the eye." — Leonardo DiCaprio. [Guardian]
• "I don't know if seniors like me at all. I think they're a little sick of me. I think they say, 'Get off! We just want to rest.' I thought I was wonderful. Then I saw a replay. I couldn't believe I was just one, two, three, turn. I didn't have the spunk I thought I had." — Cloris Leachman, on her final Dancing With The Stars performance. [Newsweek]
• "Owen Wilson is so divine in this film. I've never seen him play a part like this. He was a man; he was a husband; he was a father. And I feel like, how brave of him, to walk through the year that he walked through." — Jennifer Aniston on her Marley And Me costar. [LA Times]
• "It's a different part of my life. I try and look back on it with fondness but when I'm reminded of it I'm really embarrassed… Honestly, I really hoped my daughter wouldn't see it, otherwise she'd never listen to a thing I say again. I thought I was the coolest guy in the world but really I was just a jackass." — Mark Wahlberg on his "Marky Mark" music career. [Telegraph]
• "If someone starts talking to me negatively about something they've never actually studied that actual text of, I don't really admire them very much because it shows they don't have much integrity, so I just kind of ignore them. I'm not going to listen to gossip and hearsay about something that's affected my life so tremendously in such a tremendously positive way. It's a new religion. Historically every new religion has been [dismissed]. People were hanged, fed to the lions for their beliefs so this is just a modern day evolution of what happens when something new comes into our culture. It is not fully understood yet. I've seen drug addicts completely rehabilitated, I've seen the illiterate become literate, I've seen people that were so depressed and hopeless completely rehabilitate their goals in life, become happier, find partners. It's beautiful." — Jenna Elfman on Scientology. [Perez Hilton]
• "Every other guy I've been out with has used me for money or sex — but in most cases they just want fame. It made it hard to trust people… I loved this guy for three years but he betrayed me. Rick’s a scumbag and I hate him. It was just the most horrible thing that’s ever happened to me. So humiliating and embarrassing. But at the end of the day, I didn’t do anything wrong. I’ve found someone who loves me for me. Benji’s my best friend and I know he’d never hurt me." — Paris Hilton. [News Of The World]
• "To go on about acting as art is ridiculous. You don’t have to be gifted just to hit a mark and a line. As far as I’m concerned, that’s 90 per cent of the job. Anyone who finds acting difficult just shouldn’t be doing it." — Kurt Russell. [Daily Express]
• "I'm thinking, 'If this guy (Jesus) can die for mankind, the least I can do is quit smoking. I really felt an epiphany was happening. I even thought I saw a light around me. Four hours later, I bought a packet of Marlboro Reds. Who am I kidding? I need a cigarette." — Gerard Butler, on his religious experience at the Church of the Holy Sepulcher in Jerusalem, Israel. [ONTD]
• "I shaved my back just in case. I went fully bare, like a two year old. I was ready. I didn't want to be too real for the world. I don't think the world is too ready for a hairy back in a love scene. Has there ever been a sex scene with Robin Williams? People don't want to see that. That would border on bestiality." — Seth Rogen, on preparing himself for Zack And Miri Make A Porno. [Daily Express]

• Literary sensations Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen premiere their first book, Influence. '"Ashley and Mary-Kate take readers on a journey through their celebrated young lives, pausing to reflect on what has helped shape them into who they are today," the book's publisher said in a statement. "They interviewed 20 people and wrote brief essays about each other." Those interviewed include fashion designers Karl Lagerfeld, Diane Von Furstenburg, John Galliano and Christian Louboutin. "We interviewed the people who have inspired us, with the hope that they will inspire and teach others," Mary-Kate said. "We want to explain culturally how ideas evolve."' [People]
• The first "Cavalli Club" will open in Dubai this Fall. Says Roberto, '“living against monotony, with the enjoyment of music, of good food, of pleasant company” is the club’s philosophy. In his goal to offer “multiple culinary and sensorial experiences,” Cavalli plans an Italian restaurant flanked by a sushi bar and a wine bar on the top floor.' We can only assume this will be convenient to Lagerfeld's "Fashion Island." [WWD]
• A new investor allows Sadie Frost's company to live another day. Said a rep of the Jude Law ex and her design partner Jemima French, "Sadie and Jemima relish the opportunity to be fully hands-on again and being able to return to the creative and business helm of a fashion label. Both designers are currently working on their next collection" [Independent]

• The new Calvin Klein "Secret Obsession" campaign, starring Eva Mendes, was deemed too provocative for U.S. air waves - so it's to preview on the 'net. "TV networks will simply not allow Steven Meisel's commercial to be aired - it's too raunchy and risque, featuring Eva enjoying a private, intimate moment, set to a seductive sound track, wearing very little." [ElleUK]
• Lipstick Queen Poppy King should stick to cosmetics: "To be in fashion right now means to understand the difference between feminine and female and to get the balance right: too feminine and we are back in the submission of the '50s, too confrontational and it becomes '80s power woman. But in between these two is that wonderful space that it just 100 percent female—neither overly hostile nor apologetic. Perhaps if Hillary Clinton had got this sense of female right it may have turned out differently for her." [JC Report]
• Ashton Kutcher to return as face of Pepe Jeans London. [VogueUK]
• Cartier apparently thinks it's 2005, teams up with MySpace. [Guardian]
• Denim line Rock & Republic launches makeup line for unclear reasons. [Cosmetics News]
• Hockey player and novelty Vogue intern Sean Avery now dating Calvin Klein's ex-wife, Kelly. Well, they said Wintour was crushing on him, too...[Page Six]
• Modeling agency sues other modeling agency for model poaching. [UPI]
• Jewelry designers haggle over intellectual property. [Fashionista]
• Good old J. Crew weathers economic storm through "honesty and communication." [AdAge]
• Vidal Sassoon on his "rags to riches" story of hairstyling to the stars. [KQED]
• LVMH, Sony settle over musicians playing fast and loose with their trademarks. Kanye West, "Louis Vuitton Don," we're looking at you. [WWD]
• "Supergirl" line a fashion dream team: "Warner Bros. is moving full-steam ahead with a long-term, global Supergirl branded contemporary sportswear line, ready for resort selling. The line is designed by the trio of Shoshanna Lonstein Gruss, Alice Roi and Laura Poretzky." [WWD]
• Weak global economy means less direct sourcing from India. [Business Week]
• Despite Blane's desperate attempts to force a catch-phrase, "boring contestants" and an earlier time slot have Project Runway off to a slow start, ratings-wise. [Portfolio]
• Canadian con man convicted of selling fake Gucci stock options. [WWD]