Karl Lagerfeld To Design "Chanel Homes" On "Fashion Island"

• Kaiser Karl himself is set to help create and conceive of 80 homes on Dubai's new Isla Moda (yes, "Fashion Island"). Says the designer: "The metamorphosis of art and beauty is my passion. The discovery of contemporary mediums of expression has allowed me to pursue my interest in art, beauty, architecture and progressive cultural exchange. Dubai is a fashion bud on the verge of blossoming into the next fashion hub of the world. The city is alive with culture and rich in personality, making it a perfect place for aesthetic, fashion and design to flourish. Isla Moda has tremendous potential to be the style icon of the future and I intend on driving the island to high style stardom." [Refinery29]
• Perennially self-satisfied designer, phrase-maker and Cuomo in-law is disturbed by America's #1 slot in a recent international drug-use ranking, proclaiming it "A Number One We Don't Want To Be." [Awearness Blog]
• This blogger from New Mexico was just robbed. By chance, he happens to have been stalking Tom Ford. [Fashionista]

Fashion Flock Give Karl Lagerfeld A Sartorial Salute

Karl Lagerfeld & Friends: Black & White & German All Over

Karl Lagerfeld's Understated, Eco-Friendly Transportation

John Galliano Breaks The Hearts Of Southern College Students

• On Saturday night, John Galliano, the keynote speaker at Savannah College of Art and Design, called in sick, disappointing the hundreds of students who were probably already sort of disappointed by having to go to fashion school in Georgia for 4 years.
  [WWD, 2nd article]

• Heart bags, hot pants, and high heels with guns highlighted the Karl Lagerfeld cruise collection at The Raleigh Hotel in Miami Beach. More Scarface than Golden Girls.[WWD, 1st item]

• Jerry Hall is set to auction off the wedding dress she wore when she married Mick Jagger. Who will be the lucky (?) bidder? [UPI]
• This just in: Agyness Deyn doesn't drink during working hours, flies first class, gets knackered after a photo shoot! Now I've heard everything. [The Independent]
• Watch every woman in New York City go wild as Bloomingdale's hosts a Sex And The City lingerie party. It's a seven-day marathon with a sweepstakes prize that includes free tickets to the premiere, fingernail scratches all over your face, and your hair extensions being ripped from your skull. Good times! [WWD]

Pray For Marc Jacobs

• "It's out of control. There's always a different boy and everyone is worried he's going to pull a Halston." That's an anonymous friend of Marc Jacobs on the increasingly-erratic fashion designer. [Page Six]
  
• Ouch: David Lauren was not invited to his girlfriend (of three years) Lauren Bush's cousin Jenna's wedding. You know, Jenna Bush: Daughter of the POTUS. Apparently the Bush clan think David is too old for Lauren. Oh, and also too Jewish? Awkward. [Rush & Molloy]
  
• Kristin Davis is pissed about the injustices she faced making the Sex and the City movie: "It's in the contract that we get to keep our outfits, which is a fantastic thing, except that, for me, all of my outfits were samples. I kept my running pants, which I love and wear them a lot, but I was like, Where are my clothes?" [E!]

It's A Bird! It's A Plane! No, It's Anna Wintour's Dress

Karl Gives Restrained Response To Critics Of Wintour's Costume Gala Gown

Anna Wintour: 1; Rachel Zoe: 0

• OMG: Rachel Zoe has been disinvited from the Anna Wintour-hosted Metropolitan Museum of Art's Costume Institute Gala, taking place Monday night in New York. This is what you get when you tempt the gods and proclaim yourself more important than Vogue. [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Also, Wintour has instructed Vogue staffers that they may only wear white, silver, or other "pale shades." Just like the colors of faces that she likes to see on her magazine's cover! [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• French Vogue editor-in-chief Carine Roitfeld and designer/Chanel creative director "Krazy" Karl Lagerfeld were both named to the Time 100 List, as influential members of the fashion community. Something about the way they both made fashion about "the street" or something. [Vogue UK]
  
• Gisele Bundchen is still the top-paid model, according to Forbes. Heidi Klum is the second. Take that, Moss. [Sassybella]

Sex And The City Movie Could Not Afford Clothes In Sex And The City Movie

• It will not surprise anyone to learn that the clothes worn in the Sex & The City movie were not paid for by the movie's production budget but by designers hoping that product placement in the movie will result in clothing sales to actual people convinced that dressing like the characters in Sex & The City is a wise course of action. [Variety]
  
• Speaking of which, Matthew Broderick on the opening of his latest film, the Helen Hunt-directed Then She Found Me: "We just get dressed, get in a car, and hope for the best. But Sarah Jessica's premiere will be a big one! She looks really beautiful today, but it's just the dress rehearsal for now." [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Hell to the no, Rami Kashou did not copy Yves Saint Laurent in designing a dress for Heidi Klum! [NY Mag]
  
• Bloomingdales' workers are on the brink of their first-ever strike. That's what you get when you let retail workers unionize, Terry Lundgren! [Crain's]

This Week We Hung Out With A Lot Of Child Molesters

• We were so into the Fundamentalist Church of Latter Day Saints and their Yearning For Zion Ranch, where girls in their early teens get married off to gross molesty old men with multiple other wives, none of whom are allowed to wear red because that's Jesus' color.
  
• Are those teens better, or worse off than the brave 8-year-old Yemeni girl name Nojoud Muhammed Nasser who was married off by her crazy homeless father, but has now successfully filed for divorce.
  
• A study in contrasts: the marriage of Nojoud Muhammed Nasser versus the insane Southern belles of MTV's True Life who call themselves "old maids" at age 24.

10 Things Karl Lagerfeld Could Do Without

Supermodel Ana Beatriz Barros: The Face That Launched A Thousand Stupid Fashion Wars

• A Brazilian model I've never heard of left her new agency to go back to her old agency and now it's war. Here she is. Fuck, the Peloponnesian broke out over less, right? Or was that one about democracy and self-determination? Whatever; it's on between Elite and Next. [Page Six]
  
• The bitter battle over the rights to Project Runway, which is switching networks from NBC to Lifetime, is also approaching Total War. Can David Boies deliver Harvey Weinstein the victory he couldn't deliver Al Gore? Is it kind of funny that the Times is now referring to reality show "seasons" as "cycles"? [NYT]
  
• Anna Wintour has been sending little care packages to tennis star Roger Federer for many months now — in a motherly way? a cougarly way? are you really forcing me to think about that? — but last week when Federer was defeated by Andy Roddick, she abruptly canceled her trip to a tennis match. Oooh, nuclear Wintwar! Page Six]

Gwen Stefani Wants You To Smell Like A Doll

• Gwen Stefani's soon-to-be-released Harajuku Lovers fragrance collection comes with dolls that look just like her own Harajuku girl back-up dancers. WTF. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• OMG is Britney Spears going to "collaborate" on a clothing line with Ed Hardy? Like whoah. [Star]
  
• The newest Donatella-designed Versace watch retails for $226,800. Says Donatella: "Women don't really need a watch to tell time today — they have their cell phones and BlackBerries." You heard it straight from the horse's mouth: It's expensive shit you don't need. [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Why does making your own deodorant actually sound like fun? [BellaSugar]

Krazy Karl Lagerfeld Looks Dandy, Gives Directions

BREAKING NEWS: Karl Lagerfeld Changes Clothes

• Breaking news! Karl Lagerfeld changed his uniform. He's now rocking a gray suit and a bow tie, in contrast to the black suit and a skinny tie of yore. This is akin to the time Jay-Z announced he had stopped wearing sports jerseys, and you can expect its effects to be felt on the Karl Lagerfeld figurine industry and the Karl Lagerfeld party impersonator industry soonest. [FabSugar UK]
  
• "I told them, 'I'll only do it if you make me a guitar case with the logo on it,' " says Keith Richards, of what made him agree to be the new face of Louis Vuitton. Way to haggle, Keith! [USA Today]
  
• Barneys Creative Director/general master of awesomeness Simon Doonan's memoir of his childhood, Nasty is being turned into a TV show called Beautiful People thanks to the producer of The Office and Asbolutely Fabulous. "It's a low-rent Madame Bovary," he says. We may just be watching this. [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• Speaking of which, says Donatella Versace of Doonan, after their stint parading in the Barneys windows together: "I think Simon actually wants to be a mannequin." [WWD, sub req'd]