• Last week, Katherine Heigl complained that "cruel and mean" Grey's Anatomy producers forced her to work a 17-hour day, but according to rumors, the schedule was the result of producers shuffling things around to let her promote The Ugly Truth.

• Ken Levine, a producer who does not work on Grey's, says that everyone on the crew was paid overtime for the long day, adding, "This is an extreme case of chutzpah, but it's not uncommon that when shows become big hits cast members become much in demand... All of a sudden, the show that launched their success is now sort of an imposition... So producers are put in the sticky position of either denying them these outside projects or moving heaven and earth to accommodate them." [The L.A. Times]
• EW reports that Jude Law is expecting his fourth child this fall, "following a relationship last year." A rep adds, "no other statements will be made." Mwahaha...we'll see about that! [EW]
• Brad Pitt joked, "It's so tough being an actor... Sometimes they bring you coffee, and sometimes it's cold, and sometimes you don't have a chair to sit on." [People]
• This morning Star said that Michael Cera is 21 and had been dating 33-year-old Charlyne Yi for the past three years, but the two recently broke up (right before their film Paper Hearts opens). Newsweek ran an article dubbing him "The Hipster's Cougar Cub" but then posted a retraction, saying she's probably in her early 20s even though numerous sources say she's 33. Nobody knows here real age, and Newsweek also says he's 20, so we really have no idea how old these kids are. [Newsweek]
• Michael Jackson's friend Dick Gregory said that during MJ's molestation trial he called him saying, "They're trying to kill me ... they'll poison me!" but he was actually just so extremely dehydrated that a doctor at the hospital said if he'd waiting another 12 hours to come in he would have died. [TMZ]
• Michael Jackson's former nutritionist says he mostly existed on juice and smoothie diet, but "He loved trail mix, and once a month he had to have fried chicken." [E!]
• Michael Jackson's chef, Kai Chase, said she knew something was wrong on the morning of MJ's death because Dr. Conrad Murray didn't come downstairs to get the juice and granola he brought him every morning. She says, "I started preparing the lunch and then I looked at my cell phone and it was noon. About 12:05 or 12:10 Dr. Murray runs down the steps and screams, 'Go get Prince!' He's screaming very loud. I run into the den where the kids are playing. Prince runs to meet Dr. Murray and from that point on you could feel the energy in the house change. I walked into the hall and I saw the children there. The daughter was crying. I saw paramedics running up the stairs." Chase, the nanny, the housekeeper, and the kids formed a prayer circle as paramedics tried to save MJ. [Us]
• The DEA and the LAPD are fighting with Las Vegas police because the former agencies wanted to do a simultaneous raid of Dr. Conrad Murray's Houston and Las Vegas residences to maintain an element of surprise, but the Las Vegas police held up the second raid for nearly a week. [TMZ]
• Q: What's hanging above your sofa? David Cross: A painting of Michael Jackson being honored in the Rose Garden with Ronald and Nancy Reagan by his side. [N.Y. Magazine]
• Is Blake Fielder-Civil just holding daily press conferences now? Today he announced that Amy Winehouse cheated on him with four other guys during their marriage. [The Sun]
• When asked about the tabloid-generated rumors that Jessica Simpson would reunite with John Mayer, John's friend Rob Dyrdek said "absolutely not," but added that he "wouldn't rule out... I'm just saying [I don't think so]." [People]
• As mentioned in Midweek Madness, Us claims Tony Romo is dating Natalie Smith, the daughter of his former athletic director at Eastern Illinois University, even though all parties deny it. A source says they're "are are not officially dating, but they are having an intimate relationship." [Us]
• Ryan Reynolds rep has denied rumors that he skipped Comic-Con because of a fight with wife Scarlett Johansson saying, "[The report] is completely untrue. Warner Brothers never planned to have Green Lantern as part of their panel at this year's Comic-Con and Ryan is in Europe shooting a film." [People]
• Yesterday Kelly Clarkson blamed producer Ryan Tedder for not telling her that the backing track on her song "Already Gone" is the same one used on Beyonce's "Halo." Today Tedder replied, "They are two entirely different songs conceptually, melodically, & lyrically and I would never try to dupe an artist such as Kelly Clarkson or Beyoncé into recording over the same musical track, the idea is both hurtful & absurd." [TMZ]
• Ugh. More Twitter clues that Miley Cyrus is leaving her Jonas Brother for Justin Gaston. She Tweeted a line from one of Gaston's songs (apparently he writes music) this morning. [People]
• Georgia Sheriff Al St. Lawrence says he didn't do anything wrong by arresting and releasing the 53-year-old man accused of stalking Miley Cyrus last month. "If we had heard something about this guy supposedly being a stalker or he had been charged with a felony he wouldn't have been released," said St. Lawrence. [WSAV]
• Johnny Depp is looking at schools near Bath, England, where he recently bought a home, for his children Lily-Rose, 10, and Jack, 7. [The Daily Express]
• Madonna has written a column titled "How My Life Changed" about her religious awakening for the Israeli paper Yediot Ahronot. [AP]
• Russell Crowe walked into a charity shop in the U.K. next door to the cafe he's been frequenting while working on Robin Hood and made a £1,000 donation. [BBC]
• Friends of LeAnn Rimes and Dean Sheremet aren't doing much to dispel the rumors that their marriage ended because he's gay (in addition to her affair). They say the two were always spotted shopping for clothes for LeAnn around Nashville and, "When she met Dean, the whole image of who LeAnn Rimes was completely morphed into 'fabulousity," says the source, adding, "Her wardrobe, hair and makeup changed almost over night from the time they started being together." [People]
• For some reason Radar Online has posted the last blurry picture taken of American Idol contestant Alexis Cohen a few hours before she was killed in a hit and run. [Radar Online]
• Bob Barker met with members of the Eastern Band of Cherokee Indians in North Carolina to ask them to stop exhibiting bears in pit-like enclosures at local zoos. [Yahoo]
• Yesterday Courtney Love insulted The Veronicas and Taylor Momsen via Twitter. Lisa Origliasso Tweeted: "Is wondering what is considered 'credible' these days anyway!? A sob story? A drug addition? A guitar? Bleached hair? Give me a break.." [The Veronicas]
• Though a promo for The Real Housewives of Atlanta shows Sheree Whitfield pulling Kim Zolciak's wig off, Kim says, "It didn't happen." Co-star Lisa Wu Hartwell said of the incident, "Did that happen? You have to tune in to see that. But I know she had a hell of a grab on that. She had a serious mean grip." [Us]
• A public records search has revealed some of the names of the rides at the theme park Wizarding World of Harry Potter inside Universal Studios Orlando, including Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey, Flight of the Hippogriff, and Dragon Challenge. [The L.A. Times]
• While promoting her new reality show How'd You Get So Rich? Joan Rivers said, "I'm still in this business at age 197, and am still relevant." [Media Week]
• A memorial garden honoring Adrienne Shelly, the Waitress actor, writer, and director who was murdered in 2006 will be dedicated in New York's West Village next week. [The N.Y. Times]
• Dolly Parton's Broadway musical 9 To 5 will close around Labor Day after a short run, losing about $14 million. [N.Y. Post]
• The Bachelorette Jillian Harris says of her engagement to Ed Swiderski, "It feels more normal than any relationship I've ever had," Harris says. "It's very strange how it's such a contradiction to have something so normal come from something that's so manic." [People]
• DJ AM was once a cocaine addict and survived a plane crash, and this fall he'll help the families of addicts stage interventions on the MTV show Gone Too Far. "There's no reason why I should have lived or why I lived and they didn't," Goldstein said. "I'm never gonna know. But I am alive and I'm here and I have to do something better with my life now." [The L.A. Times]
• "(I'm) a woman who has been through life experiences, thank God, and therapy. I love therapy! I'm very into it. I'm very in touch with my feelings, so I'm a completely different person. Not that different but you know... I gotta tell you, there's nothing like going in and sitting down and talking to someone who has no emotional tie to your life. Just to talk to someone. It's amazing." — Eva Mendes [The Daily Express]
• A fan asked David Beckham where he came up with his children's names and he responded: "With Brooklyn, we found out when we were in New York that Victoria was pregnant with him, so that's where his name comes from. Romeo comes from [the fact] that we're a very romantic couple. When we first met Tom Cruise - actually quite a few years ago – I said 'Isn't Cruise a really nice name?' And Cruz came from that. Tom was one of the first people we phoned when Cruz was born and told him. [People]
• When a reporter suggested Mad Men reflected the classiness of the '60s, Jon Hamm replied: "Buddy, I don't know if they had class back then. I can send you a couple of links of stuff where guys are berating their wives for making their coffee badly. What I think happened in the '60s is I think irony happened. And the idea of selling non-earnestly became cool. And obviously that's not a mistake that that's when the baby boomers started getting 18. We're seeing a lot of it now, we're seeing these cool hipsters, man ... You can't tell 18-year-olds anything. ... That's what happens. The irony happens. And it's cool to be in a not-cool place. Get it man? And so that's what the big shift was that our guys are trying to figure out." [The L.A. Times]
• January Jones said Mad Men producers admonished her for looking too thin. "I'm naturally pretty thin, so I'm trying," she said, explaining that all the women on the show are "encouraged NOT to work out. We want soft; we don't want any muscle definition. They tell us to gain weight, gain weight, gain weight, because they want a soft, voluptuous woman which they were [back then] which is beautiful, as it should be." [I'm Not Obsessed]

• Mischa Barton's former friend Nicole Richie is helping her get her life back together after her recent meltdown. Nicole, "stepped in and talked to her about making changes in her life… basically doing a 360," says a source.

• "Mischa isn't even smoking anymore, thanks to Nicole... Nicole told Mischa that she has to straighten up because she has a lot riding on this new show," added the source. We hate to question an anonymous source, but it seems her math is a little off there. [Radar Online]
• Maybe the rumors are true: Mischa Barton is scheduled to return to work on The Beautiful Life later this week. Her rep says she "will be resuming production as planned with the rest of the cast in NYC. She's back to business as usual." [People]
• Jessica Simpson said she's not going to ask Tony Romo to return the $100,000 boat she got him for his last birthday. She explained, "I'm not an Indian giver." [TMZ]
• Joe Simpson says Jessica Simpson is "doing very good," since the breakup and she got a 5-carat diamond ring this weekend from a random jewelry designer at a party. What more could a girl want? [E!]
• "Jen romping with so publicly with Butler is like stabbing a knife through Brad's heart," claims a source, because as we all know the only reason Jennifer Aniston continues to pursue romantic relationships is to make Brad Pitt jealous. [ONTD]
• Just so you know, Brad Pitt bought another motorcycle. [The Daily Mail]
• Some are interpreting a reference Miley Cyrus made on Twitter to a John Mayer song to mean that she's going to break up with Nick Jonas for Justin Gaston... or something like that. We can't spend anymore time trying to make sense of a 16-year-old's Tweets. [People]
• Apparently Demi Lovato is still friends with Miley Cyrus even though she just broke up with her brother Trace Cyrus. Lovato says, "Recently [Miley] sent me this four-page text message encouraging me and telling me she has faith in me. It was so inspiring and made me feel great – because I do get a bit overwhelmed by the paps sometimes." [People]
• Amy Winehouse is shipping all of her equipment back from the Caribbean so she can set up a new studio and start recording her third album. [The Sun]
• Now that their divorce is finalized, Blake Fielder-Civil continues to spill details about Amy Winehouse. He says of the first time she tried heroin, "We had a bottle of pink champagne and had sex and were lying on the bed together talking. I'd been smoking heroin on my own before that, but never in front of her. I got a bit for myself, and she looked at me and said, 'Can I have some?' I was out of my mind on drugs and I said, 'Of course'. She inhaled the heroin and then just sat back, smiled and her eyes went a bit funny. She said, 'I can see why you take this'. Amy took to heroin like a duck to water, same as me." [The Sun]
• DEA agents raided Dr. Conrad Murray's home in Las Vegas today looking for Michael Jackson's medical records. An agent spoke to the press and said Dr. Murray was home during the raid. [TMZ, TMZ]
• A spokeswoman for Dr. Conrad Murray's lawyer said, "It's a waste of time responding to all these timed ‘leaks' from ‘anonymous' sources... I have no doubt they want to make a case – for goodness sakes, it's Michael Jackson - but things tend to shake out when all the facts are made known." [Radar Online]
• According to Brody Jenner he doesn't hang out with Lauren Conrad anymore. "I haven't seen much of her since she left the show," said Brody. It's almost like the producers of The Hills were forcing them to hang out. [E!]
• Apparently this L.A. Candy movie is all part of Lauren Conrad's master plan. "Lauren's goal is to get into producing – it always was," says a source, "It was always to make L.A. Candy into a film or TV show. She's been in talks about it." [People]
• Daniel Bark, the man who allegedly hit and killed American Idol hopeful Alexis Cohen has been charged with aggravated manslaughter by causing the death of another while fleeing from law enforcement officers, vehicular homicide and eluding police. Bark's attorney says he's on suicide watch. [UPI, Extra]
• Simon Cowell is dating Mezghan Hussainy, a make-up artist who works on American Idol. [The Daily Mail]
• Marilyn Manson wrote this threat to journalists on his blog: "I can, but do not need to defend myself And the absurd accusations that the average press has clinged onto. If we need a nude photo of me to prove that I am far different than the soon-to-be-murdered-in-their-home press has decided to fabricate, that is easy. But if one more 'journalist' makes a cavalier statement about me and my band, I will personally or with my fans help, greet them at their home and discover just how much they believe in their freedom of speech. I dare you all to write one more thing that you won't say to my face. Because I will make you say it. In that manner. That is a threat. Mm" [Perez Hilton]
• It seems Marilyn Manson's comments were a reaction to a recent L.A. Weekly interview that paints him as a paranoid cocaine addict and claims ex Evan Rachel Wood was nicknamed "Snowflake" because "when they played shows, she'd hold all the coke." [Rolling Stone]
• A few days before their split from Reggie Bush, Kim Kardashian said in an interview about their house hunting expedition, "I've always wanted to buy a big house myself and ... It is time for me to move. I wish my sisters could move in with me...I don't think I would ever live with someone unless I'm engaged. I'm really firm on that. I have done it before. I would tell all my friends, the best thing is to keep your independence. It feels really good to be able to buy a place by myself." Of course, People thinks this is "telling." [People]
• Hulk Hogan's divorce from Linda Bollea is nearing an end. This morning they agreed to a final settlement over their assets and Hulk told reporters, "I'm a free man." [TMZ]
• Supposedly just six months into their relationship Josh Duhamel and Fergie's relationship is on the rocks because he wants to start a family and she wants to pursue her career. "Publicly they're painting a picture of sheer bliss, but behind the scenes, cracks in their young marriage are beginning to show," says a source. [The National Enquirer]
• The Sun quoted Estelle, who sings "American Boy" as Tweeting "Rihanna just doesn't do it for me," but she says they were actually quoting one of her followers and she never insulted Rihanna. [The Daily Express]
• Ashley Jensen of Ugly Betty and her husband, actor Terence Beesley, are expecting their first child in the fall. [People]
• Ethan and Joel Coen's A Serious Man and Drew Barrymore's Whip It will premiere at the Toronto International Film Festival. [Variety]
• Warren Beatty's lawyer is arguing that it would be too expensive and inconvenient for him to travel to Delaware for the trial to settle a dispute about the movie and TV rights to Dick Tracy. [AP]
• A reporter on Good Day Scramento joked during an interview with Joan Rivers that her daughter Melissa Rivers was just riding her coattails. Joan replied: "I think we're going to end the interview right here. Don't be so fucking smart." [TMZ]
• Josh Brolin says sex with Megan Fox was "uncomfortable" ... on screen in their film Jonah Hex. [The Sun]
• Leonardo DiCaprio was spotted flirting with Ashley Roberts of the Pussycat Dolls. [The Sun]
• According to a press release from E!'s Daily 10, Kevin Federline says of his relationship with Britney Spears, "It's been really cordial, you know, thank God. We've had our rough patches, but you know, right now, we're doing great." And concerning the rumors that he'll star in a reality show about him getting back into shape, Kev says, "It would probably be pretty interesting, you know?"
• A reporter asked Nora Ephron if it's possible to achieve real happiness without butter. She replied: "I feel this way, but, you know, there are probably some people who have probably achieved happiness without it. But I feel sorry for them." [The L.A. Times]
• Dame Judi Dench was almost hit by a speeding taxi in London. The driver yelled, "You stupid cunt!" and she replied, " That's Dame Cunt to you!" [Perez Hilton]
• Diane Keaton has spearheaded a campaign to keep a developer from demolishing the Century Plaza Hotel, a curving glass and steel building made in the '60s that Keaton calls, "a sexy woman surrounded by ogling men – Sophia Loren in the 1960s". [The Independent]
• "Who's not Team Edward?" says Jennifer Love Hewitt of Twilight's Edward Cullen, "There is not a girl in the world who's not Team Edward! Have you met girls who are not Team Edward? Well, they are not girls! They're aliens from another planet who should not be allowed to exist... Listen, Edward can fly you through the forest. He's like Aladdin with vampire teeth - there's magic-carpet rides. He can sing. He can watch you sleep. He plays music. He sniffs your neck. I mean, please!" [MTV]

When the story hit USWeekly's site, the commenters came out in force to announce their hatred for Miley and to warn Nick to run from her "slutty" ways:

2:47 PM Anonymous Says:
She is pathetic- way to dump one & move on to the next. Justin is much better off without a tramp like you.
Please remind me why girls look up to her. She is UGLY and ANNOYING!

10:33 PM Old School Woman Says:
I have to agree with some of the posts here. She is another DISNEY talent that shows she is nothing but a S*UT! I fault her parents. What parent in their right mind allows a 15 year old CHILD to date a 20 year old MAN! She didn't dump him, he dumped her. She was no longer of any value to his GOALS as a celebrity. Also, they probably had NOTHING in common being that he is 20 and when they first dated she was 15! Does the word PEDOPHILE come to mind. She is no longer of any use to him. He got his 15 minutes of fame and will receive more because now the media will follow him around to get his take on the breakup. He will spew all about their personal relationship to the tabloids to make his money. What idiots the parents where to condone this relationship. He will probably talk about their personal lives too! Now Miley wants to go back to protecting her image by being with the cellibate Jonas brother! Give me a break. Miley you got USED! Deal with it!

I suspect that several of these "anonymous" commenters were fans of the Jonas Brothers who didn't want to see their imaginary boyfriend hook up with Hannah Montana. But sadly, I also think there were several adults on the site who, for some reason or another, seem to think that a 16-year-old who—gasp—dares to split from her boyfriend and "reconnect" with another boy is a total slutbag who should be shunned, Hester Prynne-style, for even daring to associate herself with more than one man before someone puts a ring on her finger.

There has always been an obsession with youth in this country; the weird fascination with teen starlets is really nothing new. And it can easily be argued that the public's obsession with Miley's sex life (as well as the sex lives of the Jonas Brothers) can be traced to the Disney "purity ring" marketing machine, which pushes sexualized images of children while attempting to rectify the situation by insisting that none of their stars are sexually active whatsoever. It's totally okay to sell sex, you see, as long as you aren't having it.

The vitriol spewed at Miley Cyrus is all too familiar: Britney Spears' career began flailing soon after her breakup with Justin Timberlake, and even now, years later, whenever Britney hits a rough patch, people seem to expect Justin to come to the rescue. It's a very peculiar setup: we, as a society, expect famous teenagers to remain teenagers forever, and we expect their relationships to stand the test of time, which is a pretty unfair burden to put on kids, as I'm pretty sure none of us would want to be stopped on the street and asked embarrassing questions about our boyfriend or girlfriend from 9th grade.

I have admitted in the past that I hate the Disney machine and what it does to young girls, and though I often find myself annoyed by Miley Cyrus (and most of that annoyance is aimed at the machine behind her, including Disney and her parents) I think this particular incident, especially the vitriol being thrown at Miley, for daring to date around and—gasp—perhaps even have sex, compared to the "protective" comments being geared toward Nick, just shows how these young women are being set up to fall, hard, just for going through the normal transition from being a teenager to being an adult. At least one commenter had Miley's back:

8:03 PM Becky Says:

I cannot believe some of you people! How can you call a girl you have never even met, and who, as far as I know, has never had a sexcapade flaunted over the rag mags, a slut? She seems like a fairly well-adjusted teenager to me. What exactly makes her a slut? Her dating an older man? My husband is four years older than me, yet no one blinks an eye at that. Or is it that she has a nose ring? Oh no! Self-expression!!! Bless my buttons and call the exorcist! Or maybe her dating an ex again makes her slutty...have none of you gone from one boy to the next quite quickly when you were teenagers? You people are pathetic.

Amen, Becky. Bless my buttons and call the exorcist, indeed.

Miley Cyrus: Nick Jonas And I Have "Reconnected" [USWeekly]
Earlier: That's Enough, Disney Girls

• A rep for Chastity Bono—the child of Sonny and Cher—confirms that Bono is in the initial stages of transitioning from female to male.

"Yes, it's true — Chaz, after many years of consideration, has made the courageous decision to honor his true identity. It is Chaz's hope that his choice to transition will open the hearts and minds of the public regarding this issue, just as his 'coming out' did nearly 20 years ago. We ask that the media respect Chaz's privacy during this long process as he will not be doing any interviews at this time." [TMZ]

• But that won't stop TMZ from hypothesizing about what Bono is going through right now. [TMZ]
• Real Housewives of New Jersey's Jacqueline Laurita gave birth to an 8 lbs., 8 oz. baby boy named Nicholas Thursday morning. No word on whether or not he's read Cop Without a Badge yet. [Us]
• An independent autopsy of David Carradine's body, requested by his family, concluded that the actor did not commit suicide. [Breitbart]
• Dr. Michael Baden, the guy from all those HBO autopsy shows, is the one who performed the examination. [TMZ]
• Nicolas Cage felt it was important enough to released an official statement alerting people that he did not hire a Voodoo Priestess to break a hex on the set The Sorcerer's Apprentice. Cage said, "I don't know why tabloids don't call up and ask before they print this gobbly gook." Maybe because you use words that sound like the name of a candy Hogwarts students could purchase in Diagon Alley, thus confirming an interest in dark arts? [NY Mag]
• Miley Cyrus is "devastated" over her breakup with model Justin Gaston, as her Tweets—"Tears are words the heart can't express"—would indicate. [Daily Express]
• But not that devastated. Miley and Nick Jonas are back on, as evidenced by blurry photos of them jet skiing together in Georgia. That's the most fun she'll ever have between her legs as long as she's with that guy. [Perez Hilton]
• Paris Hilton got over her breakup with Doug Reinhardt—real fast—with the help of a hookup with Cristiano Ronaldo. [TMZ]
• Does Rihanna have a new boyfriend? She's been seen hanging out with Canadian rapper Aubrey "Drake" Graham a bunch for the past month. I thought "Aubrey" was a girl group girl's name.[People]
• Before she was fired from her position as Miss California USA, Carrie Prejean was offered a spot on I'm a Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here! The producers of the show promised her $70,000 if she stayed for one week and $140,000 if she stayed for all three weeks. A pageant exec turned the offer down for her. [TMZ]
• Kyle MacLachlan is considering leaving Desperate Housewives to be a stay-at-home-dad. [Daily Express]
• John Cleese is recovering from eye surgery, and uplifted by well-wishers. [Daily Express]
• Television actor Johnny Palermo—once a regular on the Nickelodeon series Just for Kicks—was killed this week, along with his girlfriend, in a car accident in L.A. He was 27. [UPI]
• Martha Stewart's lynx Himalayan cat Mozart passed away. He was 19. [TMZ]
• My Name Is Earl is finally dead. A statement issued by producers said they "could not make the economics work without seriously undermining the artistic integrity of the series." [NY Mag]
• Yoko Ono was given a lifetime achievement award at the Mojo magazine awards in London, for changing "music as we know it in her own right." [BBC]
• A bunch of Austrian's are already pissed off about Bruno, in which Sacha Baron Cohen plays a gay fashion journalist who wants to be "the most famous Austrian since Hitler," saying it poses a threat to Austria's world image. Their lack of a sense of humor seems a lot more damaging. [Telegraph]
• While watching He's Just Not That Into You at home alone last night, Lily Allen had a Bridget Jones moment when she Tweeted, "I think I may be alone forever. Sad." [The Sun]
• Smug-marrieds Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz were recently photographed for NOH8, a campaign supporting efforts to overturn Proposition 8. [E!]
• A ruling from Malawi's highest court—on whether or not Madonna is allowed to adopt a 3-year-old Malawian girl—is expected Friday. [Yahoo]
• Perhaps because he knows the world wouldn't feel right if he went an entire week without being arrested, Pete Doherty was arrested last night. This time the charges were for drunk driving, driving without a license, and drug possession. [The Sun]
• Defending his seemingly drunk, early-morning live television interview yesterday, Danny DeVito said, "I was only trying to make a TV interview fun." [Radar]
• Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston did not have a secret hotel rendezvous, as reported on the cover of Star. Doye. [Us]
• Woody Allen ducked out of his own party for his latest film Whatever Works after only a few minutes. [Daily Beast]
• Kanye West admits that there is one person in the world who dresses better than he does: Lady Gaga. [NY Mag]
• Ticket sales for Les Miserables in London's West End have gone up 46% since Susan Boyle's star-making performance of "I Dreamed A Dream" during the first round of Britain's Got Talent. [Telegraph]
• A New Jersey woman— Jamie Czerniawski—who was once featured on the show Wife Swap stabbed her husband with a kitchen knife. She says it was in self-defense. Czerniawski is currently out on $75,000 bail. [AP]
• Kim Gordon and Thurston Moore of Sonic Youth are big Gossip Girl fans, and they like that the kids on the show get good grades. [NY Mag]
• Kevin Smith is taking his stand-up/Q&A show to Carnegie Hall. Silent Bob Speaks: An Evening With Kevin Smith is on June 17. [Newsweek]
• "I have to either have a baby or get engaged. I can't just be happy and have a great boyfriend and travel the world. Those things are not fantastic enough for people." - Jennifer Love Hewitt discussing how the tabloids view her relationship with boyfriend Jamie Kennedy. [E!]
• "I think women are afraid to say that they don't want children because they're going to get shunned. But I think that's changing too now. I have more girlfriends who don't have kids than those that do. And honestly? We don't need any more kids. We have plenty of people on this planet." - Cameron Diaz. [ONTD]

• Miley Cyrus and Justin Gaston have split after less than a year together. A source says the breakup was a result of Miley's traveling, and not Nick Jonas, although he and Miley "have been spending time together." [Us]

• Adam Lambert's debut album is set to drop in the fall. He says, "It's going to be ridiculous! Get Ready!!!" [People]
• And Lambert's "official coming out cover of Rolling Stone" apparently includes a disturbingly-placed snake. [Perez Hilton]
• Megan Fox is in favor of legalizing marijuana. If it ever happened, she says, she'd be the "first person in line to buy a pack of joints." [TMZ]
• In what is perhaps the most superficial news item ever, Heidi Montag Pratt is starting a dry shampoo line inspired by her hair care experiences on I'm a Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here!. [Life & Style]
• Also, Heidi and Spencer have left the show for real this time. Hollywood publicist Michael Levine says, "the audience is also ridiculous for partnering in their absurdity." Well, yeah. [ABC]
• Adam Ant credits his comeback from "his deranged and bloated appearance" seven years ago to regular exercise and his girlfriend Clare, who makes sure he eats "only the finest healthy food." [Daily Mail]
• DJ Jazzy Jeff "stormed off the stage" at Kansas City venue Power & Light District, and later said managers stopped the show "for playin' hip hop." The managers say they just wanted him to turn the music down. [Breitbart]
• Okay, so maybe Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore didn't invite Susan Boyle to sing at their anniversary. [Telegraph]
• On September 9, Natalie Cole will give her first concert after her kidney transplant and her sister's death. [AP, via Yahoo News]
• David Carradine's ex-wife says he once suspended himself from a rope in a crucifixion position while she was giving a party. When she asked him what he was doing, he said, "I really would like a sandwich." [TMZ]
• The Thai police say the FBI can get involved in investigating Carradine's death, but only in an "observer role." [TMZ]
• And photos of Carradine's body show that the rope around his neck was knotted in the front, making it more likely his death was an accident. Apparently people who practice bondage frequently knot ropes in the front for easier release. [TMZ]
• Thirty-four-year-old Enrique Iglesias says he's not yet "mature" enough to father Anna Kournikova's children. [TMZ]
• A new play about Kurt Cobain is running in London, but will it be as good as Christopher Walken's play about Elvis? [Independent]
• Bret Michaels broke his nose and split his lip when he was hit by a falling sign at the Tony Awards, but he was apparently really nice about it. [People]
• Emeril Lagasse helped Jon and Kate Gosselin prepare a meal for their 100th episode. The menu included green bean casserole, chili macaroni, and, oddly, granola. [People]
• A Toni Braxton impersonator accused of telling a Suriname audience she was the real Toni Braxton has been acquitted. WTF. [AP, via Yahoo News]
• Mike Tyson has married his girlfriend after the death of their daughter Exodus. [Radar Online]
• Shanna Moakler surprisingly took the high road in response to Travis Barker's defamatory tweets. She had her reps tell OK!, "Shanna is not going to play out her personal relationships in the media." Her relationship to Carrie Prejean's breasts is another story.[Perez Hilton]
• Depeche Mode has resumed its tour after singer Dave Gahan's cancer surgery. [NYT]
• In potentially disturbing news for St. Lucia's youth, Amy Winehouse has pledged to help them. [Mirror]
• OK! is taking Emma Watson's statement that "there's something going on" between Robert Pattinson and Kristin Stewart as proof that they are together. [OK!]
• But Watson's publicist says the statement is made up! [Perez Hilton]
• Some sources say Leonardo Dicaprio and Bar Rafaeli have broken up. [People]
• Others say they are still together, but "miserable-looking." [TMZ]
• Paris Hilton loves Doug Reinhardt, but not Kim Kardashian — according to Doug Reinhardt. [E! Online]
• Anika Noni Rose says Jennifer Hudson will be a great mom. "It's been a harrowing year for her and I hope that she finds comfort, joy and support and that she can move forward with her new baby," Rose adds. [People]
• Prince reportedly needs two hip replacements, but refuses because, as a Jehovah's Witness, he can't get a blood transfusion. [Showbiz411.com]
• A tabloid reporter slyly questions whether Brooke Shields's mom really has dementia, then says he and Teri Shields were great friends and that "most of our wonderful afternoons together never resulted in a story." What a saint. [National Enquirer]
• Terrence Howard says the Obamas should go to Prague on one of their date nights, because it is "an untapped resource of love and romance," while Paris is "overused." Russell Simmons thinks they should go to a yoga studio. [Politico]
• "I went to see Andrea Bocelli last night. The first time I've been out in months. The Hollywood Bowl allowed me to use my wheelchair." — Elizabeth Taylor, via Twitter [CNN]
• "I think I'm either naive or insane to play her - maybe a little bit of both!" — Anne Hathaway, on playing Judy Garland in an upcoming biopic [Daily Express]
• "I have a body that girls can look at and go, Oh she's not anorexically skinny. She looks healthy and she's got cellulite, yeah!" — Hayden Panettiere [E! Online]
• "(These shows) are a reflection of our society. You hear kids saying that they want to be famous, and when you ask them what for, they don't know - they just want to be famous. It's like there is this lack of passion in the doing of something that that might bring you riches. When I was little, I never said I wanted to be famous, I said I wanted to be a musician." — Lenny Kravitz, on reality shows [Daily Express]
• "He violated me. I never told anybody. I just buried it as deeply as I could and kept people at an arms length. I never really let a person get too close to me. I could have been married years ago, but I had a commitment issue." — Queen Latifah, speaking out for the first time about her childhood sexual abuse [The Sun]
• "Just know that this too shall pass.… Next week, it will be someone else on the cover [of magazines] and you can go about your life." — the sage Tori Spelling, advising Jon and Kate Gosselin on their notoriety [LA Times]

• Chris Brown has publicly addressed the Rihanna assault for the first time in a short YouTube video. He says he's working on a new album, Grafitti, and he'll release a new single this summer. He says: "Everybody that's haters, they've just been haters..."

• "All my real fans, I love y'all. I ain't a monster." [TMZ]
• Kanye West has released the music video for his song "Paranoid," which stars Rihanna. [Perez Hilton]
• Slumdog Millionaire director Danny Boyle and producer Christian Colson flew to Mumbai after seeing pictures of Azharuddin Ismail and Rubina Ali picking through the debris of their demolished homes. Boyle said a home had been bought for Ismail, and that they would soon buy one for Ali. Boyle said, "We've been trying for a long time to move them into legal accommodation." Ali's father, Rafiq Quereshi, countered, "It has been five to six months. Everything is available in Mumbai if you have the money. If you really want to get us a house, you can get us a house in two days." [Reuters, E!]
• Kate Gosselin's estranged brother Kevin Kreider, who has given interviews to numerous media outlets in the past few weeks, has reportedly been offering to talk about what it's like behind the scenes at Jon and Kate Plus 8 for $30,000. It's not clear which news outlets paid him, but he insists he and his wife Jodi Kreider are, "speaking out now because we want to be the voice of our nieces and nephews... We're seeing it turn tide, that they're being viewed as a commodity." [E!]
• Susan Boyle supposedly watched fellow Britain's Got Talent finalist Shaheen Jafargholi perform on a TV at a London hotel bar, and when one of the judges complimented the 12-year-old, Boyle yelled "fuck off" and waved two fingers (a dirty gesture in the UK) at the screen. A rep for the show said, "As far as we are aware Susan was not at the bar during Shaheen's performance. She started watching the show there but left early and watched some of the acts in her room as she was being asked for interviews in the bar by journalists." [Newser]
• A representative for Susan Boyle said, "Susan was in the bar with friends but was getting hassled by a journalist. The four of them left before Shaheen's live performance to watch it in the room instead." [The Daily Mail]
• American Idol scandal: AT&T provided free phones so fans could text message their votes at two Arkansas parties supporting winner Kris Allen in Arkansas. They even showed people how to "power text," which lets you send 10 votes at a time and is forbidden in the show's rules. AT&T says they were invited to parties organized by locals, but no free texting services were offered to Adam Lambert supporters. [Perez Hilton]
• Terri Seymour has requested a restraining order from Janice Thibodeaux, the woman who attacked her outside the American Idol finale last week. She says, Thibodeaux, "attacked [her] from behind, putting her into a headlock, wrenching her neck and choking her with the full force of her 200 pound frame," and could have killed her if the cops hadn't intervened. [TMZ]
• Suri Cruise will only eat with chop sticks. "Suri doesn't like to eat with anything else," says a source. During a recent visit to Le Pain Quotidien, "She wouldn't touch her sandwich and pastries without them!" [Star]
• Justin Gaston says he doesn't live with girlfriend Miley Cyrus, but in an apartment in North Hollywood with two roommates. But he may wish he lived with the Cyrus clan. When asked to describe his dream life Gaston says, "[I'd be] one of those little lapdogs that gets petted all day... You know, they wake up, get fed, get attention. I like attention. I'd like to be one of those little dogs. Is that weird?" [People]
• Michael Lohan was arrested last month because his former fiancee Erin Muller says he threatened to killer her when she tried to end their relationship in March. Lohan appeared at court on Long Island yesterday, but fled when he saw members of the media. He's due in court today because he has been charged with falling behind in child support payments. [The Daily Express]
• Mel Gibson's pregnant girlfriend, Oksana Grigorieva, already has an 11-year-old son from her relationship with Timothy Dalton. "It [seems] very important to Oksana that Mel and her son bond," says a source. "Mel is fun to be around and great with kids." [People]
• A fan made it past security backstage at Beyonce's concert in London and tried to speak to Beyonce. A source says, "He cried out her name with his arms outstretched before security bundled him back out again. He said he wanted to see Jay-Z to give him a demo tape." [The London Paper]
• Melissa Joan Hart is on the new cover of People in a bikini because she lost 42 pounds after having a baby. Plus, dieting to be on the cover of the mag is pretty much the only career move former teen stars have left. She says, "Everyone still thinks I'm huge, but I'm not anymore!" [People]
• Jennie Garth has revealed that she has a leaky valve in her heart, which was discovered seven years ago. "A lot of people have it," she explains. "They don't know they have it ... [It] leaks blood." She says that sometimes she can feel it too. "It sort of flutters open and shut sort of a thing ... It's weird because sometimes when I'm resting I can feel a little weird fluttering." It may get more complicated in the future, but for now it is not dangerous. [People]
• Andy Garcia's brother-in-law has been sentenced to 15 years in prison. Ramon Puentes Jr. was convicted in the Fuel Farm Case, a large scheme to siphon jet fuel from the Miami Airport's fuel depot. Garcia and Puentes' wives are sisters. [UPI]
• Justin Long says Alison Lohman, his Drag Me To Hell co-star got "banged up really bad," while filming the movie. He said: "I have never seen an actress work so hard and she would always have a different bruise, it was like the bruise of the day, 'What's on the menu today?' and she would be like 'check this out, it looks like Uzbekistan and I don't know how I got it.'" [The Star]
• The State's lost comedy album has surfaced online. "We would love to do more," said David Wain, who was a member of the comedy group. "The State is an 11-headed beast though. Getting anything to happen requires divine miracles - just in terms of scheduling and logistics." [Rolling Stone]
• Lauren Conrad says she's looking forward to living "a little more unplanned," when she leaves The Hills. She says, "It's hard to look at somebody who used to be your best friend and say, 'We can't be friends. Too much has happened... I'm trying to move on, but they won't let me. And when someone keeps pushing you into the same position, well…you get upset." [ONTD]
• Amy Winehouse won't return to London unless she can find a St. Lucian chef to move to the UK and cook for her. A friend said Amy told her, "there's no way she'll come back unless she can find a chef she likes and who is prepared to move country. She really doesn't look after herself when she is back in London, and is always skipping meals." [This Is London]
• Mackenzie Phillips, who entered rehab for the 10th time in September 2008, will appear on the third season of Celebrity Rehab With Dr. Drew as a "sober coach." As you may recall, last season's sober coach was Gary Busey. [TMZ]
• Morrissey has called off yet another London concert. His rep said: "Morrissey is on continued doctor's orders not to sing, to ensure a complete recuperation." [The Mirror]
• Katie Price already had estranged husband Peter Andre's things put into storage, and today a locksmith's van was spotted outside their home. [The Sun]
• Bethenny Frankel of The Real Housewives of New York is blogging each week about The Real Housewives of New Jersey. She says Teresa, "is clearly living vicariously through her daughter." Jacqueline's daughter is spoiled and "her mother is a sweet doormat who doesn't seem to want to take a position on anything." As for Dina, she says she's, "willing to bet she's had some minor work done on that pretty face of hers." Is Bethenny not aware that she'll definitely have to meet these women, or that they could be at her front door in about an hour? [E!]
• "Cameron Diaz cuts a lonely figure as she takes a solitary swim in Hawaii." Poor Cam is so lonely since she broke up with Paul Sculfor. Jennifer Aniston is probably free to hang out with her, as she's just been sitting around thinking about how much she misses Brad Pitt for the past few years. [The Daily Mail]
• Phylicia Rashad plays matriarch Violet WestonWell in the play August: Osage County. When asked why she plays so many matriarchs, she said: "Consider what you're asking. How many women in the world are matriarchs? Many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many. It's not a role foreign to women, is it? So there. [Laughs.] So there." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Joy Behar says she likes Fred Armisen's Saturday Night Live impression of her. "I think he's right on. I think he's got me down. He gets the fidgeting. I'm a constant fidgeter. It's probably why I don't weigh 200 pounds, because I keep working it off by moving constantly and fidgeting and fixing my hair. And this phrase, 'So what? Who cares?' — I realize that I say that a lot and that it's basically a philosophy of life." [The Star Tribune]
• Marilyn Manson has a new album, The High End of Low. He says: "Track two is called "Pretty as a Swastika." It's something I said to a girl because of her complexion - with black hair, red lips and pale skin. I mean, it was a complex and poetic comment that soon led to intercourse, so I felt no reason for it to be seen as confusing, hateful and destructive. The record label [told me], Take it off the album. Rather than do so, I decided to produce it on the inside of the sleeve with a different name, so it'll be sold in Wal-Mart or wherever stores sell guns but are afraid to deal with lyrics. So I put "Pretty as a ($)" because all of their motivations are based on money." [Time]

• Miley Cyrus wants to dump her boyfriend Justin Gaston, but her father doesn't approve:

According to the National Enquirer, "Billy Ray thinks Justin is a solid, stand-up Christian guy who keeps his nose clean and stays out of trouble," says a source. But: "It's finally dawning on (Miley) that she's young, rich and famous," the source said. "And she can have any guy she's interested in." [MSNBC via National Enquirer]

• Poor Jonas Brothers: Their new show has fewer viewers than Miley Cyrus' Hannah Montana. [LA Times]
• Lindsay Lohan is hazardous to little sister Ali Lohan's health, says a psychiatrist who does not treat either of them. "If you have an older child who is breaking a lot of the rules and engaging in dangerous and risky behavior, this can have a negative impact on the younger child," says Dr. Eva Ritvo. Um, duh. [NY Daily News]
• The self-proclaimed father of Mercy, the child Madonna is trying to adopt, is being called an "opportunist" by Mercy's family. [NY Daily News]
• Did writer James Frey tape his phonecalls with Oprah Winfrey or did he just make it seem like he did, in a new "fictional" passage in his book? [Page Six]
• George Clooney is willing to help his buddy Rande Gerber — Cindy Crawford's husband — in regards to that sexual-harassment lawsuit filed against him. Turns out Cloons was with Gerber the night of the alleged incident. This should get interesting… [E!]
• Gerber says both he and Clooney are willing to take lie detector tests! [MSNBC Scoop]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Is Gisele Bundchen pregnant? [Page Six]
• Courteney Cox ran into Brad Pitt at a concert — you know, her best friend's ex-husband — and "chatted away" with him all night. Page Six seems to think this was evil of her. [Page Six]
• Spencer Pratt spoke to The Daily Beast, dropping gems like: "Heidi and I do we love fame… We're honored to be famous. We feel blessed to be famous. We pray every day to stay famous. It's the most fun. That's our mentality with fame. That's why we're so different than everybody else in these tabloids-because we embrace it." He also says: "Interscope can put $18 million behind Nicole Scherzinger's flop solo album, but Heidi and I are going the underground route, where iTunes takes its cut, and the rest goes to Heidi. Sure, Lady Gaga's got hit songs, but she's eating at Taco Bell. Heidi's got amazing songs and has her portrait on the wall at Cut [steak house in Los Angeles]." And! "Twittering is an absolute gift from God." [The Daily Beast]
• So you know how Jessica Simpson is, inexplicably, on the June cover of Vanity Fair? The mag's PR director says it's because: "She's at a crossroads in her career… Where she's headed - or not - says a lot about the nature of celebrity in America. And she looks pretty decent in a swimsuit, contrary to recent reports." All together now: *headdesk.* [MSNBC Scoop]
• Amy Winehouse has been "frolicking" with a "mystery man" in St. Lucia; as seen in these pictures, dude is dark & lovely. He may be a "local sheller" named Anton Moses; a source says: "Amy has become very cozy with Anton. Amy sets aside every evening to spend time with him and each day he saves her his best shell." [Daily Mail]
• The woman who is accused of having a thing with Jon Gosselin of Jon & Kate Plus 8 speaks! Deanna Hummel says: "We're just friends." [People]
• Susan Boyle is so popular now she's had to changed her phone number. For her home phone, that is: The "technophobe" has been given a mobile phone but is "nervous" about using it. [The Sun]
• Dolly Parton's children's book, I Am A Rainbow, drops May 14. "It's about moods - pink for shy, red for angry, green for jealous," she says. "It teaches children that we all have these moods; it's about what you do with them." [USA Today]
• Liam Neeson has spoken to the ski instructor who last saw Natasha Richardson alive. A source says: "He was very dignified and never sought to blame anyone - he just wanted to understand what happened for his own peace of mind." [The Sun]
• NBC wants advertisers to know that Jay Leno is "advertiser friendly," and "not afraid to experiment with live commercials and with sponsorships." Which doesn't sound desperate at all! [AdAge]
• "Since swine flu is super trendy I wanted to make sure I was in style with my swine flu ring!" blogged Katy Perry. There's a picture of her new ring, which is a sparkly flying piggy. Katy also blogged about a conversation she had with her cat, Kitty Purry: "Kitty Purry was telling me the other night that she remembers when bird flu was in and now pig flu is cool and she wonders when kitty flu is gonna hit," writes Perry, "as she would like to be more popular than she currently already is. Fame whore." [People]
• Ed Westwick was spotted kissing costar Jessica Szohr at the BritWeek charity football match in L.A., but when asked if his girlfriend was there to support him, Westwick answered, "My who?" [Mirror]
• Christina Aguilera will make her silver screen debut in a flick called Burlesque. She'll play "an ambitious smalltown girl with a big voice who finds love, family and success in a Los Angeles neo-burlesque club." In other words, yes, she will sing. [Variety]
• Jack White wants Kate Moss on his new band Dead Weather's album. As an aside: White Moss would be a cool name for a band. [The Sun]
• By the by, Meg White is engaged to guitarist Jackson Smith, son of Patti Smith and Fred Smith. [People]
• Also betrothed: Alyssa Milano and CAA agent Dave Bugliari, who just had an engagement party Saturday. [E!]
• Bebe Neuwirth was wed to Chris Calkins, founder of Napa Valley's Destino vineyard, in a "quiet" Buddhist/Christian ceremony performed by Peter Coyote, who has one of the best voices in showbiz. [Page Six]
• Mad Men! Returns! But will be sorta delayed! It was supposed to come back in July! But we'll have to wait until August! Still! Mad Men! Returns! [Variety]
• Click the link at the end of this sentence if you would like to see a giant Lego portrait of JK Rowling, which kids helped build. [Telegraph]
• Your friend Billy Zane has baby fever! "I'm single right now — and kind of loving it," he says. "[But] I hear the patter of little feet. But I foresee that - I sense it, I feel it, I feel it coming. It's just a sense that you get. I think I'm ready for fatherhood. But I'm not out there hunting for my bride - as of yet." Then he got in the lifeboat and left you behind. [Daily Express]
• Ed McMahon, who was suing L.A.'s Cedars-Sinai hospital for misdiagnosing a neck fracture, has settled his lawsuit. [TMZ]
• "Dallas star Victoria Principal 'threatened maid with a gun after accusing her of taking too long walking her dog.'" [Daily Mail]
• "It's peculiar and unnerving in a way to see so many young people walking around with cellphones and iPods in their ears and so wrapped up in media and video games. It robs them of their self-identity. It's a shame to see them so tuned out to real life." — Bob Dylan to Rolling Stone. [Page Six]
• "You know, I've seen him [Springsteen] several times in concert, and I've only met him twice and I put out my hand and I mumbled. I couldn't get a sentence out. The same thing happened with Mick Jagger. We were on the plane coming back from Miami." — Henry Winkler, aka The Fonz. [Daily Express]
• "I no longer feel insecure about my acting. Early on I took any job that was offered, milking it for the money. I had no idea what I was doing - that's when insecurity and self-loathing start." — Tom Hanks, star of Turner Y Hooch. [Mirror]
• "My friend's mom, Wendy, blogs almost daily on a site called Wendy from Encore which goes great with my morning coffee. I like to catch up with my friends across the country by reading their blogs, which is ironic as the phrases 'my friend's blog,' 'blogging' or 'blogosphere' always make me cringe. I just happen to have some very clever friends who are wonderful writers and offer up a slice of real everyday life." — Scarlett Johansson. [The Daily Beast]
• "I always find it funny that so much skin-cream advertising features, like, Jessica Alba. She's gorgeous and 12!" — Brooke Shields to More. [Page Six]

• El oh el: It appears none of the celebrity weeklies have bought exclusive rights to pictures of Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt's wedding this weekend.

A source says they're not worried, because chances are, the pix will end up in all the mags: "They'd rather be on page 50 of Us, People, In Touch or Life & Style than be on the cover of a magazine like OK! that isn't going to sell. They need to make money, and so does the magazine. The formula is changing," spills a source. [MSNBC Scoop]

• In this video of concert footage, Britney's extensions get ripped out of her head and left behind on a couch. [Perez Hilton]
• Kudos to TMZ for the headline, "Britney Weaves It All On Stage." [TMZ]
• Lily Allen celebrated the end of her tour by having a "massive ice cream fight" in her dressing room. But she paid the clean-up bill: "Cost me $2,000. End of tour, time to get mashed." [The Sun]
• In case you forgot that Madonna's boyfriend Jesus Luz has a job, he totally walked the runway in a Jeffrey Fashion Cares fashion show. How do we feel about those white trousers? [WWD]
• Even though Miley Cyrus is with Justin Gaston, is she still hung up on her ex, Nick Jonas? Were they making out recently? Are they MFEO (made for each other)? [Gatecrasher]
• Jay Leno, who hasn't missed work in years, checked himself into a hospital with a "mystery illness." [NY Daily News]
• Paris Hilton's "BFF," Brittany Flickinger, was in a car crash in Hollywood last night; she wasn't wearing a seat belt and slammed her head into the windshield. Luckily, she escaped with only a chipped bone in her leg. [TMZ]
• Behold: Video of Justin Timberlake, in foxy glasses, talking about his mancrush on LeBron James: "He just lights me up!" He also declares Caddy Shack as the best sports movie ever. [Rolling Stone]
• Ashton Kutcher's Twitter can now be considered a place to break new artists; he wrote about an unsigned singer/songwriter named Alex Highton and now the guy's MySpace is blowing up. [Telegraph]
• Guess who stars in one of Kanye West's next videos? Rihanna. Yeezy says, "She's an amazing talent…Collaborating with her is always a pleasure!" [Fashion Week Daily]
• Amy Winehouse's dad flew to St. Lucia yesterday to check on the singer. Will they go horseback riding together? [The Sun]
• Beyoncé wants to do Broadway in a couple of years, when she's settled down and had some rugrats with Jay-Z: "It's my ideal job," she explains. "I'll be able to go to the theater every day and drop my kids off and maybe make some food — maybe I'll know how to cook by then — and then go do what I love and have some normalcy and have a regular schedule." [Reuters]
• Kim Kardashian on Miss California, Carrie Prejean: "I don't agree with her narrow mindedness and neither do a lot of people… Everyone has the right to be happy and be treated equally and I think not allowing gay marriage just kind of puts us back." But KK also says: "Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. She stood up for what she believes in so she should be happy with that backlash." [People]
• Is Pam Anderson down and out? Or is Courtney Love high? Wait. Don't answer that. Courtney says: "Pam Anderson doesn't even have a credit card. And she lives in Paradise Cove — which is in Malibu, but it's a trailer park in Malibu." [Page Six]
• This piece about Russell Crowe begins: "He is a man's man - or, rather, he is the kind of man in whom shabby, ageing, overweight, altogether untidy and unresolved males can see their manly image. In other words, Russell Crowe seems more than happy taking very little care of himself, his appearance or his 'glamour.'" Why don't you tell us how you really feel? [Guardian]
• Jerry Seinfeld's grandparents arrived in this country via Ellis Island, and their story will be in the spotlight on May 19, when the Statue of Liberty-Ellis Island Foundation bestows a "family heritage" award on Seinfeld. [NY Times]
• Parker Posey is no longer dating Keanu Reeves and has moved on to a graphic designer and sculptor named Scott Lenhardt. As seen in this picture, they're super happy and adorbs. [NY Mag]
• Aww, pictures of Slumdog Millionaire stars Dev Patel and Freida Pinto nuzzling up to each other over lunch in Israel — where Pinto is filming — will melt your cold, tiny heart. [Daily Mail]
• This report calls Kate Middleton Prince William's "bride in waiting," and notes that it's been discovered that she's related to Swallows And Amazons creator Arthur Ransome. [Daily Express]
• Blogger Julia Allison lives in the same apartment building as Rosie O'Donnell. Wednesday she posted a Twitter which read: "Holy shit. My neighbor Rosie O'Donnell has been having a knock down drag out screaming match with Kelli for the last hour. Sad. :( " Anywho, JA deleted the post, maybe because it's an invasion of privacy, but it's sorta too late. [Ed note: This will be the only mention of Ms. Allison on this blog for all of 2009.] [Gawker]
• Dane Cook was on Larry King Live, talking about his half-brother and former manager who embezzled millions from him: "It's a terrible betrayal. But hopefully justice will be served and I can move on with my life." [ET]
• Sniffle: Elton John, Paul McCartney and Mick Jagger have lost "huge chunks" of their personal fortunes due to the economic crisis. [Reuters]
• Stephen Dorff has joined the cast of the porn industry comedy Born To Be A Star, which is produced and co-written by Adam Sandler. [Variety]
• Blind item! "Which closeted - and married - actor almost had his cover blown when he hit on a straight man in a sauna? Word is the offended dude is now quite wealthy, thanks to a payoff." [Gatecrasher]
• "Although I'm her friend, [I don't want to defend her to her detractors] because that's their right as well. They feel really strongly about their opinion for pro-gay rights, and that's great." — Miss USA on Miss California. [Gatecrasher]
• "I realized I was spending hours and hours in the middle of the night signing autographs. Unless I had assistants forging letters and signatures I knew I couldn't continue. So I posted a message on the internet saying: 'If I can't do it honestly, I won't do it any more.'" — Viggo Mortensen, on answering fan mail. [Daily Mail]
• "He called me and said, 'You know let's do it right away.' It was really emotional. I think the only way he could have come back was right after because his family was all there to support his boys. Liam is heroic. He came back and finished. I think he's trying to absorb [what's happened] ... He's suddenly a single parent with absolutely no preparation for that. But he is surrounded by people that really love him. There is a lot of support." — Director Atom Egoyan, on Liam Neeson, who returned to the set of the film Chloe days after his wife Natasha Richardson died. [People]
• "We're just extremely careful with our shit. I keep a CD with me, I'm the only one who usually has a CD. Maybe me and Dre… Other than that, nobody has it." — Eminem, on how his new album avoided getting leaked. [Rolling Stone]
• "Watching it was horribly unhealthy for me. You think that would help keep me sober, you know seeing myself as this raving lunatic...It absolutely triggered these crazy urges to get loaded." — Steve-O on watching his upcoming documentary about his addiction and recovery. [E!]
• "For some reason people think like if you tell someone they're too thin that's OK. But if you tell someone they're too heavy that's insulting… It hurts either way. I'm the same weight I was before I was pregnant. I've been pregnant for two years in a row. I'm the same weight I was on 90210. I'm the same weight I was before I met Dean and we got married. It's the same." — Tori Spelling. [AP]
• "If you read some of his early-life autobiography, it's horrible... the amount of mental anguish he has to go through, just to have any kind of even vaguely sexual relationship. It's really depressing what he's going through in his head. Dali had a massive fear of penetration – penetrating someone or being penetrated… [As for the love scenes with a man,] I think girls almost really like watching something like that. From what I've read, people really get excited about that – it sounds really sexy!" — Robert Pattinson on playing Salvador Dali. [Independent]
• "Marijuana has always been that drug that united people. It's always been on the verge of being legal. It's hardly a drug really. When people look at marijuana, they look at it as an enjoyment of connecting." — Redman. [NY Daily News]
• "Most of the time, songs that I write end up being finished in 30 minutes or less. 'Love Story' I wrote on my bedroom floor in about 20 minutes. When I get on a roll with something, it's really hard for me to put it down unfinished. — From "10 Questions For Taylor Swift." [Time]
• "I don't even know what 'tweeting' means ... but it sounds dirty!" — Michelle Trachtenberg. [Gatecrasher]

[Hollywood, March 31. Image via Splash.]

[Los Angeles, March 22. Image via WENN.]

• New details on Rihanna: The warrant detailing the entire assault has been released, her family says she's changed her contact information, and her rep isn't denying that she and Chris are engaged.

• A search warrant affidavit based on "Robyn F."'s statements was filed to obtain cell phone records for Rihanna, Chris, and one of Rihanna's personal assistants. The report alleges that Chris beat Rihanna while driving and tried to push her out of his car. Rihanna called her assistant during the attack and pretended to tell her, "I am on my way home. Make sure the cops are there when I get there," but she got the assistant's voicemail. Chris said: "You just did the stupidest thing ever. I'm going to kill you." The report says he put her in a headlock and she almost lost consciousness. You can read the entire document here: [The Smoking Gun]
• Law enforcement sources say that on the night of the attack, Rihanna said Chris had been violent to her in the past and the attacks were getting more violent. [TMZ]
• The tabloid magazines are insisting that Rihanna and Chris are either married or engaged, and when her reps finally responded, this is what they said: "Sorry for the delayed response, but we aren't able to offer anything right now but will keep you in posted if that changes." Are they not in touch with Rihanna or is it possible that the story is true? [Perez Hilton]
• Rihanna's dad, Ronald Fenty, says that he and Rihanna's mother and brother can't reach her anymore because her phone numbers and email have been changed. He said of Chris Brown being charged: "Justice can never be served in this situation. He can't feel the pain she felt. I don't believe in hitting a woman. I hope everything works out better for them. I don't feel happy or sad. He's in the court's hands. Let justice prevail." [Us]
• Whoever runs Chris Brown's MySpace picked today to post a reminder to vote for Chris for the Kids Choice Awards. [MySpace]
• Jaime Lee Curtis wrote a post on the Huffington Post complaining about the New York Times story on President Obama going gray. "Give me a f-ing break," she writes. "Are we really so deluded ... that we are focusing even one inch of a column of this venerable institution, the New York Times as well as every other outlet, Huffpost included, on the president's hair color?" [The Huffington Post]
• A Beatles version of Rock Band is coming out in September. Instruments modeled after the ones uses by the band will be sold to go with the game. [AP]
• In this video from last night's David Letterman, U2 read the Top Ten List and The Edge goes off script and makes fun of Sting. [E!]
• Watch the new Wolverine trailer, with many gratuitous shots of a shirtless Hugh Jackman here: [Perez Hilton]
• Former Monkees guitarist Peter Tork has been diagnosed with a rare form of cancer in his tounge. He has Adenoid Cystic Carcinoma, a cancer of the head and neck, but says his prognosis is good. [The Daily Mail]
• Miley Cyrus's boyfriend, Justin Gaston, was once on the cover of an European teen magazine called Electric Youth! wearing a Speedo. [Perez Hilton]
• Julia Roberts was invited to be one of the former winners presenting awards at the Oscars but turned the Academy down. "My husband had been away and just returned home so I felt it best to stay home and welcome him and be with my family," she said. "That was my priority so we watched the show on television." [The Telegraph]
• Oprah is going to talk about her interview with Michelle Obama on Friday's show and share pictures. The interview will appear in the next issue of O Magazine. [Chicago Sun-Times]
• Robin Williams has postponed his comedy tour because he needs heart surgery. He's getting an aortic valve replacement and hopes to be able to work again in the fall. [TMZ]
• Politico has an "exclusive" interview with Brad Pitt in D.C. ... in which he doesn't say a word. [Politico]
• Dr. Laura is criticizing Kohl's on her blog for choosing Britney Spears to represent their brand Candie's. Kohl's answered one of her reader's complaints, saying Brit "personifies the iconic ‘Candie's Girl:' flirty, self-confident, and stylish." Dr. Laura says, "How 'bout 'piggish, out of control, and irresponsible parent?'" [Dr. Laura Blog]
• Vince Vaughn is actually engaged to 29-year-old Calgary realtor Kyla Weber, according to her dad. [Montreal Gazette]
• Blake Lively says when Gossip Girl returns on March 17 Serena will have a new love interest and "You get to see a little bit of the economy reflected on our show. There's a bit of a Bernie Madoff-type thing happening." [USA Today]
• Adele is apologizing to Justin Timberlake because she was overwhelmed backstage at the Grammys and didn't realize it was him when he congratulated her. "Justin, I love you and I'm really sorry ... for making it seem like I didn't want to meet you," says Adele. "I really did – and I don't think we can ever be friends because you're just too much. You're too good!" [Peopel]
• In this video a paparazzi asks Michelle Rodriquez, "How's your community service going?" and she shoots back, "How's your dick sucking going brother?" [Jossip]
• You can watch the commercial Helen Hunt directed for Frito-Lay snack brand TrueNorth here: [Ad Week]
• D.L. Hughley Breaks the News will end its run this month. CNN says Hughley approached them about ending the show because he wants to move to L.A. [Media Bistro]
• Jerry Seinfeld, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Jason Alexander, and Michael Richards will be featured on a multi-episode story arc on HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm this fall. [Entertainment Weekly]
• [AP]
• On the set of The Burning Plain Mexican director Guillermo Arriaga's friend Adrian would teach Charlize Theron swear words in Spanish and have her repeat them to the director. Theron says: "Adrian was like 'Go to Guillermo and say... I can't remember now, and I would say it really loud and half the crew understood it!" [The Mirror]
• Taylor Swift says: "My friends and I took pride in the fact that we were the weirdest girls at our school. We never fit in with the cool girls because we didn't really care what people thought. We had so much fun goofing off and being being crazy. We would go out to dinner in our prom dress, accessorized with scarves, fingerless gloves and costume jewelry. Sometimes we'd draw a beauty mark on our faces, wear a tiara and funny slippers. We didn't care!" [Perez Hilton]
• Michael Caine is playing an old man forced to enter a nursing home in his new film Is Anybody There? He says: "I don't think of me as an old man ... I play a guy, 75, 76, and I tell myself, 'He is not you. He is him. He's very sick. He is getting dementia. And he has a much harder life than you have.' I always like to stretch myself and do films that interest me. I thought he was a wonderful old man. I really loved him." [USA Today]
• Roseanne Barr wrote another lengthy blog post about Rihanna and Chris Brown. She says that Rihanna is sending out the message through her publicity team that she provoked Chris so he's not to blame. "I just know from experience that this is how show business works to conceal and excuse domestic abuse," she says. "I also know from experience that it is common that the woman throws the first insult or punch. the big dirty secret is that violent men are with violent women and vice versa. They continue to stay together so they can continue to be violent, break up and then make up, involving all their families and their friends in the whole sick and stinking charade. They both need to go to jail, if in fact she did hit him or terrorize him psychologically. I lived through this crap, and I know how it goes." [The Life Files]

• Miley Cyrus, 15 and Justin Gaston, 20, were "all over each other" backstage at the Christian Audigier show at LA Fashion Week. Justin walked in the show, and everytime he passed, he would blow a kiss and wink at his teenage girlfriend, and she, witnesses say, "licked her lips seductively as he passed her." A source heard Miley saying she was going to skip the after party to stay at Justin's and have a party of her own. [Page Six]
• Britney's dad testified in her misdemeanor driving-without-a-license trial Thursday that California is not her permanent residence. "Her home is Louisiana," he said. Um, perjury? Anyone? [People]
• Oh, Britney is building a house in Louisiana. This much is true. [TMZ]
• Look for Britney on the January cover of Glamour magazine. Shot by freakin' Patrick Demarchelier. [NY Mag]
• Yeah, so John Mayer spent his birthday with Jennifer Aniston. He had a party at the Grand Havana Room, a members-only restaurant and cigar club in L.A. They totally sat next to each other and "seemed happy." [People]
• In Angelina Jolie's interview with the New York Times, she says she wants her kids to see Mr. And Mrs. Smith someday: "Not a lot of people get to see a movie where their parents fell in love." Team Aniston peeps think that she's admitting Brad cheated on Jen with her. But Team Jolie folks are like, hey, it is when they met, and they denied they were together physically. The threads over on this posting are crazytown. [ONTD]

• Surprise, surprise: Amy Winehouse didn't show up for her DJing gig at that pub in London. She was "bedridden." [Mirror]
• Katherine Heigl: Adopting a Korean baby. So says the National Enquirer. Katherine's big sister Meg was adopted from Korea more than 30 years ago and has had a "profound impact" on Katherine's life. [ONTD]
• Awesome pix of Justin Timberlake and Ellen Degeneres playing golf. [ET]
• Madonna and Guy have not been speaking to each other for a while, because they allegedly "cannot be in a room together for more than a few minutes without having a shouting match." Think of the children! [Perez Hilton]
• Um, this report says Madonna's marriage began sliding towards divorce after her hubby’s "unsympathetic" reaction when she fell off a horse and broke eight bones. [The Sun]
• A source close to Guy says "It wasn't just one thing. They just lost their connection." [People]
• Madge and Guy won't battle over money, but they will fight over custody of the kids. They both hired high-powered lawyers. [Daily Mail, Telegraph]
• Madonna's brother Christopher Ciccone says Kabbalah killed the marriage. [The Sun]
• Maggie and Jake Gyllenhaal's parents: Officially filed for divorce. Naomi and Stephen Gyllenhaal were married in 1977. Is it too early to start drinking? [TMZ]
• DJ AM has actually escaped death twice: "In the burn center, they did a scan and found that I had a blood clot that in this flight could have traveled to my heart and I could have died," he says. While still at the burn center in Georgia, he was put on blood-thinning medication. [People]
• Contrary to earlier reports, Steve Wonder's house did not burn down in the L.A. fires. Overjoyed? [TMZ]
• Tea Leoni in More magazine, talking about her new movie, Manure: "But at the same time, we have this incredible cast with Billy Bob Thornton, who is maybe my new favorite person in the world." [ONTD]
• Billy Bob Thornton swears he is not the reason David Duchovny and Tea Leoni split: His publicist issued a statement which reads: "Billy Bob Thornton and Téa Leoni are just friends." Strong words! [E!]
• Kathy Griffin's says Bravo claims she's signed on for another season of My Life On The D-List — but she hasn't, and she's "trying to extract tens more dollars from Bravo." [Perez Hilton]
• Is Bruce Willis getting married? He took his model girlfriend Emma Heming to Cartier in Beverly Hills and they totally looked at rings. [Daily Express]
• Mena Suvari's engaged and wants a "fairy-tale wedding." [Yahoo News]
• Actress and Brooklynite Hope Davis on the recession: "Even the little spa on my corner is advertising 50 percent off facials. Everybody’s suffering; it’s going to affect everybody." [NY Mag]
• Are you ready for an Eminem comeback? He's releasing a book on October 21 and an album later in the year. Here are some personal pictures that will be in the book, including snaps of Em as a kid, a picture of his first mix tape and shots of him with his daughter. [EW]
• Susan Sarandon: Guest of honor at the second annual Middle East International Film Festival in Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates. She said: "In the US we don't have the opportunity to see these films; even English(-language) documentaries are hard to find. Festivals are a wonderful opportunity for people to see documentaries they might not normally see." Plus, the formation of a Middle Eastern chapter of Women in Film and Television was announced. [Reuters]
• Daisy Lowe broke up with her boyfriend Will Blondelle because records by her ex, Mark Ronson were being played in a club. Yeah, I dunno. [Mirror]
• Hadn't heard this, but Kenneth Branagh will not direct Jude Law in Hamlet as planned. Branagh dropped out due to a scheduling conflict. [UPI]
• Headline of the day: Phil Spector "Used Obscene Language About Women And Stated They Should Be Shot." [Daily Mail]
• James Taylor's playing five free concerts for Obama in the election battleground state of North Carolina. "It's a great relief to see someone running who believes government can do good things for people," he says. He adds, "I've seen fire and I've seen rain." [AP]
• The Supreme Court says Survivor champ Richard Hatch must serve out the rest of his four-year, three-month prison sentence for failing to pay the IRS taxes on the million bucks he won. [E!]
• Chris Kattan and Sunshine Tutt officially divorced, after two months of wedded bliss. What's up with SNL alums and short (heh) marriages? [E!]
• Stephen Baldwin on Barack Obama: "If he wins the election, he'll hurt me. He's a cultural terrorist." [Perez Hilton]
• "I lie all the time. The last lie I told was the last time someone invited me to a wedding, or a christening, or a party. I can't say, 'I don't really like you that much, I'm worried about the other people you'd invite; a wedding bores me stupid, I think it's ridiculous and pointless and I'd rather sit at home in my [underwear] drinking wine." —Ricky Gervais. [Guardian]
• "I strongly feel there needs to be a new way forward. Barack Obama is pushing things in the right direction. I’m excited about the election. Unfortunately, things will probably get dirty. I hope Obama can stay above the fray … I’m hopeful for the first time in a long, long while. It’s one of the most exciting elections in my lifetime." — Daniel Craig, who knows he can't vote, but is watching US politics very closely. [MSNBC]
• "I don't like guns much, and the reason I don't like them is because I do like them. If you put one in my hand, I feel incredibly omnipotent. And I hate that truth." — Colin Farrell. [Rush & Molloy]
• "I’m never at home and every woman gets sick of it. If I was them, I wouldn’t put up with me for too long, and they don’t. I wonder if I’m going to be relegated to three-year relationships for the rest of my life." — George Clooney. [Mirror]

[Los Angeles, September 14. Image via Flynet]