Downton Abbey creator Julian Fellowes would have liked to give Matthew and Lady Mary Crawley a happier ending, but wasn't able to because Dan Stevens bailed so unceremoniously.

While Jon Hamm is known for leaving only one thin layer of clothing between us and him, which has left an indelible large-phallus-shaped imprint on the Internet/cultural landscape/your dreams, AMC is concerned that our more-than-passing acquaintance with his scrote is distracting us from all the Serious Acting that…

A few days ago, Kim Kardashian said that what she got most from her relationship with Kanye West was an appreciation of privacy. The new cover of French fashion mag L'Officiel Hommes features Kimye's idea of what "privacy" is, whose definition clearly got switched to "maybe fucking on a magazine cover" in the Oxford…

The universe works in mysterious ways, but occasionally a gear will click into place and simplify at least one aspect of your troubled adult existence. Examples: cheese going on fries, and the fact that Blair Waldorf and Seth Cohen are dating. See? Motherfucking TOLD YOU. It's like the plot of The Time Traveler's Wife…

Speaking of pictures ripped out of Teen People that you glued on your 5th grade Trapper Keeper (weren't we? we totally were), Britney Spurrz has gotten the jump on her boss Simon Cowell. She's quitting The X-Factor before Cowell and the other assorted Powers that Be can fire her, tired of paying her $15 million to say…

Aw, shucks! Even after all these years (Grease came out in 1978), John Travolta (Danny Zuko) and Olivia Newton John (Sandra Dee) have remained close. And looky here! They even performed a new Christmas song together and turned it into a music video. "I Think You Might Like It" follows the story of two aliens disguised …

K8 Middleton, rather delightfully referred to in this New York Daily News article as a "queasy royal," is feeling a little better after getting fluids but remains in London's King Edward VII hospital due to severe Wingardium Leviosa!! hyperemesis gravidarum. A palace spokesman wants everyone concerned for Kate to know…

What Not To Wear co-host Stacy London reveals in her upcoming book The Truth About Style that she came by the lessons she doles out to women in sartorial need the hard way. When her psoriasis began at the age of 4, she grew into a self-punishing adolescent who battled anorexia and compulsive overeating, with a weight…

As that Philip Larkin poem goes, "They fuck you up, your mum and dad / They may not mean to, but they do / They lose track of you right around the wrap party for Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen / And then passively watch as you implode your own career."

This morning serves us up some Gossip Girl meta-theater. Rumors on the set of GG are that Blake Lively is "glowing," which is Hollywoodese for "Lookit, there might be a baby in that person." A source from the show adds, "Blake is usually really careful about what she eats, but since her wedding, she seems to be eating a lot …