[New York, September 23. Image via INF]

[New York, September 12. Image via INF]

• "If I were writing a letter to Sarah Palin it would be a lot of whys and hows. Who are you? Do you know? Why do you hate animals? Please point out Iraq on a map… This woman hates women. She is not a feminist. She is not the woman that's going to come behind Hillary Clinton and do anything that Hillary Clinton would've been capable of … I can't imagine overturning Roe vs. Wade. She's not of this time. The woman terrifies me." — Pink. [Perez Hilton]
• Lindsay Lohan on Sarah Palin: "Is our country so divided that the Republicans best hope is a narrow minded, media obsessed homophobe? Oh, and...Hint Hint Pali Pal- Don't pose for anymore tabloid covers, you're not a celebrity, you're running for office to represent our, your, my COUNTRY!" [TMZ]
• Lindsay and Samantha Ronson: Seen in an "intense liplock" for "at least half an hour" at NYC's trendy Beatrice Inn. [Page Six]
• Lindsay punched a paparazzo because she thought he tripped her, but actually, she tripped on a metal barricade. Whoops. [TMZ]
• Jennifer Lopez completed her first-ever triathlon on Sunday in Malibu and raised $127,000 for the Children's Hospital of L.A. in the process. A very quick "recovery" from the "foot injury" she had that prevented her from judging the Project Runway fashion show on Friday. Could it be that she wanted a part in a Harvey Weinstein film, and found out she wasn't getting it, so pulled out? [MSNBC]

• Has being Woody Allen's muse turned Scarlett Johansson into a bitch? [Page Six]
• Liz Taylor went to her favorite gay bar on Thursday night! She was out at The Abbey in West Hollywood. Says a witness: "She was lively. She was laughing and she was smiling." Apparently she "held court" in a back corner, holding a martini while a friend held her Maltese, Daisy. [People]
• Five Leaves, the Brooklyn bar owned in part by Heath Ledger's estate, has opened. The decor is '20s-era industrial steel. Mary-Kate Olsen and Michelle Williams maybe attended the unofficial opening. [Gothamist]
• Frances Bean Cobain's 16th birthday party was a "suicidal 16" bash in which guests were awarded prizes if they dressed the "most dead." Girl, where is your mother? Oh yeah. [E!]
• Producer Swizz Beatz is getting divorced and Alicia Keys could be "the other woman." [Rush & Molloy]
• Carla Bruni's ex, Jean-Paul Enthoven (she left him for his son, with whom she had a kid before marrying President Nicolas Sarkozy) is getting "revenge" with a novel. The main character is a cold, wealthy, shopping-obsessed woman. [Times of London]
• Amy Winehouse didn't show up to her own birthday party. She missed a guitar-shaped birthday cake! [The Sun, Mirror]
• Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have made a $2 million donation to create a health center for AIDS and tuberculosis affected children in Ethiopia. The center will be named after daughter Zahara. [E!]
• Guinness World Records says that Brad and Angelina are the world's Most Powerful Actor and Actress. But we all know Maddox, Pax, Zahara, Shiloh, Knox and Vivienne are actually in control. [UPI]
• Daniel Dae Kim of Lost pleaded no contest to drunk driving charges (from Oct. 25) and paid a $500 fine. [Breitbart]
• The Promises Foundation received an autographed oil painting of Britney Spears from Britney Spears, which they're going to sell on eBay with a starting bid of $10,000. Good luck with that! [UPI]
• See the painting here. She's not wearing a top. [TMZ]
• Is manager Larry Rudolph to thank for Britney's epic turn around? [Daily Mail]
• Brit threw her boys a truck-themed birthday party on Saturday. Jamie Lynn brought daughter Maddie. The kids drove around in toy cars with personalized license plates. There were no DUIs. That we know of. [Yahoo News]
• Naomi Campbell is in love, and after having surgery on her ladyparts, thinks she would like to have a baby. [Daily Mail]
• George Takei and Brad Altman were married Sunday in a multicultural ceremony at the Japanese American National Museum that featured a Buddhist priest, Native American wedding bands, a Japanese Koto harp and a bagpipe procession. [Yahoo News]
• "I did not set out to make a controversial film or a social commentary. If Dakota Fanning is so shamed for telling that story, what message does that give victims? I did not set out to make a statement, but in the 12-year process of trying to get this film made I have been unable to avoid facing the politics of being a woman filmmaker and telling women stories…" — Deborah Kampmeier, director of Hounddog, the film often called the "Dakota Fanning rape movie." [NY Times]
• Maryline Blackburn, who won the 1984 Miss Alaska pageant — when Sarah Palin came in second — is now a singer living in Atlanta. Blackburn, who is African-American, says, "Sarah was kinda in my top five. You're kind of looking at all the girls and when I first saw her I thought, 'Oh my goodness, she's absolutely beautiful.' She's a gorgeous woman." But! On November 4? "It's all about Obama, Obama," Blackburn says. [WSBTV]
• Jennifer Hudson: Engaged to boyfriend David Otunga. [People]
• Peaches Geldof and husband Max Drummey now have matching tattoos. [Mirror]
• Spike Lee is ending his feud with Clint Eastwood and maybe starting one with Judd Apapoe [sic]. [Deadline Hollywood]
• Kylie Minogue will perform on the artificial Palm Island in Dubai at the opening ceremony of a 5-star hotel… Ending speculation that Madonna was gonna do the gig. [Mirror]
• John Mayer did a striptease for Heidi Klum. Yeah. [Rush & Molloy]
• Check out Beyoncé playing a hot cop in her new video. [Concrete Loop]
• Damon Dash indeed has sole custody of his son, Damon Jr. His ex girlfriend enrolled the 16-year-old in school in Long Island when he went to visit her, but a judge was like: No. [UPI]
• The only Sienna Miller fansite online might be shutting down! Says the webmistress: "I cannot get past the fact that to me she has completely changed from the Sienna I became a fan of back in 2004." [ONTD]
• This picture shows Sienna walking while Balthazar Getty drives alongside her, in an effort not to be photographed together. [The Sun]
• Contrary to earlier reports, Holly Madison did not dump Hef for Criss Angel! [E!]
• While accepting her award at the Creative Arts Emmys for the video "I'm Fucking Matt Damon," Sarah Silverman said: "Thanks to the person for whom this whole video was made: Jimmy Kimmel, who broke my heart – ohh, who'll always have a place in my heart." [People]
• Matt Damon and Wyclef Jean distributed rice, beans and oil to residents of Haiti, where hundreds of people are homeless and hungry after four devastating hurricanes have hit since mid-August. [Yahoo News]
• Shannen Doherty has shot four episodes of the new 90210, which is all she signed up for. Will she do more? Does the CW want her to? [Yahoo News]
• Shenae Grimes has been "tormenting everyone on set" of the new 90210. [Page Six]
• Mark Ronson and Daisy Lowe: Splitsville. [Mirror]
• A bunch of teachers spill about what stars Amy Winehouse, Jude Law, Simon Cowell and Lily Allen were like as kids. Guess who was an arrogant, "polished character" and popular with the girls? [Guardian]
• Short on cash, Pete Doherty paid for a taxi with paintings he'd done. [The Sun]
• Queen Latifah was going to call her new album The L Word "just for fun" to mess with people who think she is gay. (But, um, isn't she?) [Daily Express]
• Cyndi Lauper to mentor contestants on Australian Idol! [News.com.au]
• Sir Paul McCartney will be guarded by armed secret agents during his gig in Israel — he's apparently the "enemy of Muslims." [The Sun]
• Richard Gere and Debra Winger: Acting together again for the first time since An Officer and a Gentleman? [Fox 411]
• David Beckham: Booed, after his soccer football team lost. [Independent]
• Steve Irwin's 4-year-old son wants his own TV show. [Independent]
• "There is such a great lesson to learn in having your children in the kitchen with you. Children can smell the smells and watch all that goes into the preparation of the food. It’s a five-sense experience for them." — Rachael Ray. [NY Times]
• "I feel there must be an enormous amount of really talented songwriters out there who can't sing. So, please, send me your songs." — Roger Daltrey of The Who. [Daily Express]

• Lindsay Lohan has turned down a $700,000 offer to pose topless in Playboy. Since we already saw her nipples in New York magazine, what would be the point? [Page Six]
• Meanwhile, there's a truce in the Lohan fam: Michael is actually saying nice things about Dina! And mom, dad and all the kids will allegedly all be together for the final service for Lindsay's grandfather, who died last week. They'll scatter his ashes in a Long Island harbor. [E!]
• You know how Sarah Palin was on the cover of Us? Apparently the magazine "lost thousands of subscribers in the first 24 hours" following the printing of the issue. [MSNBC]

• Lily Allen's suffering from a major hangover and some regret after drunkly swearing on stage at the GQ Awards. Her Facebook status is "dying inside" and she wrote that she "feels like killing" herself, although that part has since been removed. Free champagne is a blessing and a curse. [Daily Mail]
• Leighton Meester and Blake Lively of Gossip Girl: Guest stars on 30 Rock this fall. Apparently Liz Lemon was a mean girl in high school! [EW]
• Heidi Montag: "I'm waiting for my Barbie Doll. That's what I want next." Spencer Pratt: "We just talked to Mattel yesterday, and we are already working on our own Ken and Barbie." That sound you hear: Thunderous hooves, as the Apocalyptic horsemen approach. [Socialite Life]
• Romeo Beckham is The Dark Knight. [The Sun]
• Balthazar Getty and Matthew Rhys, who play brothers on Brothers & Sisters are not speaking to each other, and it's Sienna Miller's fault. Naturally. [E!]
• Hayden Panettiere, 19, is moving into her own house in West Hollywood. But! Her beau, Milo Ventimiglia, is upset because he thought they were moving in together. Turns out she's wary of Milo, who keeps talking about marriage. A source says: "She's not even old enough to have a drink, so she's not even thinking about settling down." [Star]
• Whoa, there's a feud between Alec Baldwin and Greg Garcia, the exec producer of My Name Is Earl. Alec can't understand why they'd do a one-hour episode of Earl: You've got to be fucking kidding me," he says. Garcia says Alec sounds like a "psychotic narcissist." [Page Six, Defamer]
• This story about Jennifer Aniston is titled: "Did Brangelina Spoil Jennifer For Other Men?" Here is an actual line from the article: "When it comes to men, Jen’s radar seems hopelessly broken, leaving her prey to the serial-shagger charms of men such as [Paul] Sculfor, who is now cosily loved up with Cameron Diaz, and [John] Mayer, who has been involved with a string of other celebs including Jessica Simpson and Jennifer Love Hewitt." [The Sun]
• Amy Winehouse ordered 48 bottles of Jack Daniel's. For a weekend gig. [The Sun]
• Kim Kardashian is helping sister Khloe with Celebrity Apprentice. First assignment: Lunch with Omarosa. Uh-oh! [Page Six]
• Tension in New Kids On The Block? Seems like Donnie won't hang out with the other kids or play their reindeer games. [Page Six]
• Richard Branson says, "The best way to reduce your carbon footprint is not to fly at all. But that's not realistic. You can't walk to England." He has a solution, of course: "Fly Virgin. One hundred percent of all profits from all our airlines are reinvested into finding a cleaner fuel solution. We had an experimental 747 that ran on coconut oil… but it took 150,000 coconuts for one flight. So now we're looking at developing fuel from algae. If you fly Virgin, you'll support this cause." [Rush & Molloy]
• Rachel Weisz was voted Hollywood's hottest babe — in a poll of 4,000 lesbians. [The Sun]
• Actor Joe Pantoliano, aka Ralph Cifaretto on the Sopranos, was at the RNC lobbying for his charity, No Kidding, which deals with brain disease. Joey Pants sufferers from clinical depression. [Page Six]
• The court case between Matt LeBlanc and his former business manager has been settled. You can click to see the court papers or think a happy thought about butterflies, and I suggest the latter, because the papers are a yawn. [ET]
• One year after vowing never to perform on the MTV Awards again, Kanye West will close the show's 25th annual ceremony in Hollywood on Sunday. [Reuters]
• Christina Aguilera will also perform at the VMAs. [Daily Star]
• Don't hold your breath for U2's new album: It's been pushed to 2009. Bono says the band has 50 or 60 new songs to consider for inclusion. Decision time. [Reuters]
• The dude who robbed Kiki Dunst's hotel room last August is getting four years in jail. Maybe that's why his MySpace has Jewish prayer music on it? [Gothamist]
• Ciara: Naked on the cover of Vibe magazine. [Concrete Loop]
• Akon performed in South Africa last week and when one of his female fans embraced him, he violently elbowed her off the stage. [Molly Good]
• Anthony Edwards will appear on the final season of ER, but Dr. Mark Greene is not back from the dead: He'll be in flashback scenes. [AP]
• Are you the Gatekeeper? Columbia Pictures is working on a new installment of Ghostbusters. [LA Times]
• An L.A. businessman is suing Gene Simmons over an Indy Racing League deal. [E!]
• "It's going to stop one day. It's not that you fall. It's just one day there are new people, and, you know, the opportunities aren't what they once were. It happens to everybody, man. I prepare for the worst. I think every show I do, I realize I could get booed off the stage and they could throw tomatoes. Hey — Michael Jackson, man. One day you're Vanilla Ice and the next day you're…Vanilla Ice." — Chris Rock on his career. [Page Six]
• "I live in Costa Rica, way off the grid. We live off solar power, with no car, and no telephone. I'm nothing like my character. I'm more into the environment." — Perrey Reeves, aka Entourage's Mrs. Ari Gold. [Rush & Molloy]
• "I didn't really have any expectations. They say it gives you a little more juice for the first year and that's it. It certainly didn't help me get this movie made." — Helen Hunt, on life after winning an Oscar, and her directorial debut, Then She Found Me, in which Salman Rushie has a part as an obstetrician. [Guardian]
• "The corsets were very restrictive. The worst part was after lunch because they don’t help your digestion." — Keira Knightley on burping her way through The Duchess. [The Sun]
• "I don't always love kids. Sometimes I absolutely loathe them. Children are just people who haven't lived very long yet. I'm predisposed to be affectionate if someone’s smaller but if they're loathsome in the first five minutes, they're loathsome.” — Colin Firth. [Daily Express]
• "I had sex if I had the energy. I wasn't one of those guys who believed in the myths about the guy losing his chi. The fact is that if you are riding your bike six, seven hours a day, you are not a sex champion. You're just not. You have fatigue, low testosterone and a lower libido. But you know, I never got any complaints." — Lance Armstrong to Men's Journal. [Page Six]

• The crew on Madonna's world tour is threatening to quit because they had to stay at a cheap airport hotel while she stayed in an £11,000-a-night castle. It cannot be confirmed whether or not Her Madgesty said, "Let them eat cake." [Mirror, WOW Report]
• Here's the latest on David Duchovny: He may have had an addiction to online porn. And he may have released a statement about it because he was already in treatment and a fellow patient was about to sell info to the tabloids. [Fox News]
• Looking back at old interviews, Duchovny revealed his love of porn and '80s porn stars. [People]
• Meanwhile, Tea Leoni has canceled her appearance at the Toronto Film Festival. [People]
• Lindsay Lohan hung out with Sam Ronson instead of going to her grandfather's wake on Long Island. [The Sun]
• Lindsay signed a MySpace message "This song is for SR… ILY." Translation: "This song is for Sam Ronson. I love you." [Pop Dirt]
• Are Queen Latifah and her long time partner Jeanette Jenkins planning on adopting? Are they out now? [ONTD]

• Some dude's been arrested for stealing a digital camera that had pictures of Kate Middleton and Prince William vacationing in Mustique together. The camera belonged to Kate's little sister Pippa and the guy intended to sell the snaps to the tabloids, obvs. [Daily Mail]
• Kevin Spacey: Seen pinching the bare bottom of some dude. [Mr. Paparazzi, via Perez Hilton]
• Says a witness: "Kevin looked like he was having a brilliant time." [The Sun]
• Elisabeth Hasselbeck of The View is heading to the Republican National Convention on Thursday. She'll fly in and out on the same day. "I must really want John McCain elected," she says, "because I would not get on a plane like that for anyone else." Oh, the sacrifice! Thank God McCain has you. [NY Daily News]
• The apocalypse is nigh: Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are opening a bar. In NEW YORK. To be called The Hill. [W]
• Save Katie! The anti-Scientology group Anonymous will be protesting at opening night of Katie Holmes' Broadway debut in All My Sons. "We aren’t looking to shut it down, we just want to prove a point," says a spokesperson. [MSNBC]
• Josh Hartnett and and unnamed female friend went into a little-used library at a SoHo hotel and started getting "hot and heavy." Since the hotel — and the library — are under security camera surveillance, the staff saw a little show on a monitor. No video link, sorry! [MSNBC]
• Michael Phelps shot a cameo for the new season of Entourage. "It was like being in New York City with one of the Beatles," Kevin "E" Connolly says. "People were stopping in the streets and climbing up things to see him. They were going nuts. He's like a superstar." [Yahoo News]
• Meanwhile, Michael Phelps is totally not talking about the ladies and doing his best to have some privacy: "I never said I have a girlfriend, and I never said I don't have a girlfriend," he says. [People]
• DNA evidence has linked an air conditioning repairman to the 2001 stabbing death of Ashley Ellerin, Ashton Kutcher's former girlfriend. [Yahoo News]
• Johnny Depp was on stage with his old band! One night only! He played guitar and sang backup! It was for charity. [Yahoo News]
• This was probably inevitable but still: Oy: Agyness Deyn is working on a Hollywood career. [Daily Mail]
• Not that you asked, but Britney has been working out "super hard" and is in "great shape." [Page Six]
• Angelina Jolie would like to work on a European film. "No one has asked me yet," she says. "When I can really speak it, maybe I'll try out for a French film in a few years." [Breitbart]
• Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty: Moving in together? They looked at a $22 million mansion in Malibu and Sienna liked it. (At that price point, what's not to like?) [Perez Hilton]
• Maroon 5's Adam Levine: Seen hitting on newly single Anne Hathaway at the Vanity Fair DNC party. Uh-oh, isn't Adam on that herpes chart? [Fox News]
• James Gandolfini, 46, married his fiancée Deborah Lin, 40, in her hometown of Honolulu, Hawaii on Saturday. "They both wore long, green leis around their necks," says a source. "There were lots of white flowers on the tables and Gandolfini was beaming." [People]
• French actress Emmanuelle Beart and director Fabrice Du Welz are defending their latest movie, Vinyan, in which Beart stars as a mother who loses her son to the 2004 tsunami but refuses to believe he is dead. The character and her husband go looking for the kid in the jungle of the Thai-Myanmar border and stumble across a terrifying world ruled by savage children. It's a horror film, but the director says, "I tried to be as respectful as I can. I don't want to be unpleasant to people who have really suffered from the tsunami." [Yahoo News]
• John Mayer got really drunk and partied with a blonde cocktail waitress on the last night of his world tour. On stage, he mentioned reading The Secret and said "I had a conversation recently, and a lot of tears were exchanged." Jen Aniston, sniff, sniff. [People]
• This is just coming out now, but apparently Amy Winehouse overdosed twice last year: Once in July, from smoking hash for 36 hours; next in August from cocaine, heroin, ecstasy, ketamine and crystal meth. Now she might have brain damage or schizophrenia from the drugs. [The Sun]
• Another "Amy Winehouse may have brain damage" story. [Daily Mail]
• Headline of the day: "Could Scarlett Be The Next Spielberg?" Yes, Ms. Johansson wants to direct. [Daily Express]
• Mel Gibson has become "close to" a "glamorous Russian musician" on the set on his new movie but he says she's just a colleague and he remains happily married. [Daily Mail]
• The stage musical version of 9 To 5 features 19 new Dolly Parton songs. "She's so lovely and so humble," producer Robert Greenblatt says. "She says, 'I'm not sure I'll get you the whole way there, but I'd love to give it a try. If something doesn't work exactly, I'll rewrite it.'" [Variety]
• Colin Farrell saved this homeless guy's life by giving him cash and telling him: "You need to get your life together, man, promise me. And make sure you go see my new movie." [Toronto Sun]
• Jude Law is visiting Afghanistan to promote peace. Yeah, I dunno. [AP]
• Sign of the recession? Diddy had to give up his private jet. [The Star]
• Natalie Portman won a humanity award at the Venice Film Festival, where she made her directorial debut with a short film called Eve. [The Star]
• Duran Duran fan? Maybe you wanna read about how cocaine destroyed the band. Written by Andy Taylor! [Daily Mail]
• Sixty-two year old Cher has a 36 year old man and she hired a private jet to fly him and two of his buddies to Memphis to catch a Merle Haggard show, which is kind of awesome. [Page Six]
• Michelle Williams and Spike Jonze: Still on. [Page Six]
• Leanne Rimes, 26, has been married for seven years, and says she is ready for a baby. [People]
• "You are bugging the fuck out… No disrespect. …Alaska? I don't even know if there's any black people in Alaska. If you really think we're gonna let you win the election with these crazy decisions that you're making, you're bugging." —Diddy's thoughts about Sarah Palin in a video directed to John McCain. [Perez Hilton]
• Jerry O'Connell says pregnant wife Rebecca Romjin craves lemonade and soy cream cheese. "Can't be cream cheese. Soy cream cheese. Do you know how difficult it is to find soy cream cheese? It's usually in the corner of the supermarket someplace!" [People]
• "The easiest sex scene I have done was in Mulholland Drive because it was with another woman. There was no awkwardness. There was no sexual tension." — Naomi Watts. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "When it comes to fashion, I know about as much as Betty. I love to play dress-up and it’s fun, but I’m not interested in the fashion world. If I wasn’t an actress, I’d probably want to be a teacher." — America Ferrera. [Mirror]
• "I always knew I was never the prettiest or ugliest girl in the room. Life's too short to inject botulism into you face to get rid of a tiny line because you've laughed too much. I don't feel a need to lose weight, because I'm not 21. I'm happy with my package." — Ashley Jensen, aka Christina on Ugly Betty. [Daily Mail]
• "It's very strange to be here in London without Anthony Minghella, whom I loved very much, and very painful. I was so frightened in the first week of shooting The English Patient, I was trembling, but he was trying to find a way to win my trust, and he just said to me, 'Well, fly...' and I did and it changed my life." — Juliette Binoche. [Independent]
• "Victoria and I are very different. People bracket us together because we live in the same city and we’re both interested in fashion. Victoria’s fashion line has been very successful and, hopefully mine will be too. But that’s where the similarities begin and end." —Melanie "Scary Spice" Brown. Not that you knew she had a fashion line. [Daily Mail]
• "The only thing I can cook really is mince meat, which is ironic because I'm a vegetarian. But I like calzone and lasagne. I cooked every day in Spain so David and the boys lived off minced meat for four years. I cook a Sunday dinner every single Sunday I'll have you know. My kids like Yorkshire pudding so I make that, I can make it from scratch and I make Dora the Explorer cakes for afters because the kids love them." — Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham. [Daily Mail]
• "I can't even think about having another baby right now. The boys take up so much of my time." — Victoria Beckham. [Mirror]
• "I don't care for [romantic comedies] where the guy is emasculated, tossed around by the woman, and lacking a point of view. It's a disservice to both the male and the female. I like to give my guys some balls" - Matthew McConaughey to Plenty magazine. [Page Six]
• "I kind of want to see how the audience responds first. I don't want to overstay my welcome." — Shannen Doherty, on whether she will stick with the new 90210. [LA Times]
• "I informed British Airways of my late arrival. I told them I was a kind of minor celebrity and I might get a bit of hassle at the airport. Turns out they are complete arseholes. Even when I fell over and badly creased my hat, I had no assistance. I was crying but I didn't want them to see. A cynic might say I missed the plane, an honest man might say I went to the airport a little late." —Pete Doherty. [Mirror]
• "I think manipulation is something that women do a lot, it's still our number one problem. You look at those characters [in The Duchess] — Georgiana and Bess — and they're hugely trying to outmanoeuvre each other, but I think it's also possible for intense love affairs to happen between women — not necessarily sexual, but things can obviously take a sexual turn. Women do get obsessed with other women — whether they love them or hate them, and I think that line is very easy to cross." — Keira Knightley [Guardian]

• David and Victoria Beckham were in a car crash Friday in France. David was driving his BMW to the Nice airport when he lost control and crashed into a wall. No kids were in the car; Posh was the only passenger. The vehicle had a smashed windshield and damage on the passenger side, but everyone was OK. Bex had to catch his plane (to appear in the Olympic closing ceremonies) so he left poor Vicky with the car… [Perez Hilton]
• Playdate! Kingston Rossdale and the Spears brothers! Britney entertained the three boys while Gwen and Gavin have their hands full with a new baby at home. It says a lot about Brit's progress that people will leave their kids with her, huh? And look, only two nannies in the accompanying picture. [Daily Mail]
• Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie can claim £1,400 a month in child benefits after registering France as their home. Not that they will claim the money. Because they are perfect. [The Sun]
• Lance Bass helped Christina Applegate recover from her double mastectomy. "I was at the hospital holding her hand and getting her through it," he says. "She is a very, very loved person. She's a big crossword puzzle girl. That kept her busy. In her hours of recovery, she's made all these roses out of lace. She has hundreds and hundreds of these amazing different roses. She doesn't know what she's going to do with them." [People]

• Apparently the trailer for Keira Knightley's new film, The Duchess, has shots of Princess Diana intercut in it, with the words "The two were related by ancestry and united by destiny… History repeats itself." Except Keira's flick is about Georgiana, Duchess of Devonshire. Who did not die in a car crash. [Telegraph]
• Madonna and Guy renewed their vows in a private Kabbalah ceremony in London. A-Rod, shmay-rod! [Daily Mail]
• Madonna's Sticky & Sweet tour kicked off over the weekend! [The Sun]
• Madge has $1 million worth of Swarovski crystals on her costumes! [Mirror]
• Her show was "epic" and featured a video appearance by Britney Spears, as well as virtual appearances by Kanye West and Pharrell Williams. [Mirror]
• Madonna's workouts to get in shape for her tour have paid off. Hubby Guy Rithie says: "Her legs are Olympic standard. She is in amazing shape. You won’t find a fitter bird than her. Her legs are so toned. She’s fitter than dancers on her tour who are half her age." [The Sun]
• Madonna's tour includes negative images of destruction: global warming, Hitler, Mugabe and Senator John McCain. Then! Positive images! John Lennon, Al Gore, Mahatma Gandhi and Barack Obama! [AP]
• Um, the McCain camp is not happy about Madonna's tour images. "The comparisons are outrageous, unacceptable and crudely divisive all at the same time." [Yahoo News]
• Is Madonna sparking a stocking trend with her 100 pairs of fishnets? [The Sun]
• Four relatives of Helena Bonham Carter were killed in a minibus crash while of a safari holiday in South Africa last week. [Times of London]
• Amanda Bynes was in a minor car accident Saturday afternoon in L.A. She made an unsafe turn and another car hit her. No serious damage, no drugs or alcohol. [People]
• Jet-setting billionaire Charles Simonyi is engaged to a Swedish woman named Lisa Persdotter, which is weird because Martha Stewart has often referred to him as "my boyfriend." [ONTD]
• Chris Kattan filed for legal separation from his wife, Sunshine Tutt, citing irreconcilable differences.The couple were engaged for 18 months and married for less than 2 months. Sigh, WWMD? (What Would Mango Do?) [Yahoo News via E!]
• John Mayer paparazzi shots aren't worth very much now that he's not with Jennifer Aniston. [MSNBC]
• Barenaked Ladies frontman Ed Robertson and three other people are "very lucky" to have survived a plane crash yesterday. The float-plane went down in the trees in Bancroft, Ontario, Canada. [Toronto Sun]
• Kim Kardashian cut her foot in her hotel room Sunday night. A source says there was so much blood, it looked like a murder scene. She sliced her foot open on a glass coffee table — right before she's supposed to start Dancing With The Stars! [ONTD]
• George Michael's final farewell concert was in London over the weekend. "It's great to be home," he said. (I won't let you down. I will not give you up. Gotta have some faith in the sound… It's the one good thing that I've got.) [Telegraph]
• There was a beachside premiere party for 90210 over the weekend, with Shannen Doherty and Jennie Garth in attendance. [AP]
• Boy jeans: Now seen on Jennifer Aniston. Katie Holmes, what hath thou wrought? [Daily Mail]
• Drew Barrymore: seen singing "I Will Survive" at a karaoke joint in Detroit with Whip It co-stars Juliette Lewis and Ellen Page. It's okay, you'll find better than the Mac dude! [Mirror]
• Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty went house shopping in Malibu! The "love nest" they checked out was priced at £11million. Guess that's what Getty oil money will get you. [Mirror]
• Snoop Dogg has been granted a visa to perform in Australia, despite his long list of drugs, firearms and weapons charges. You can't hold back the dee oh double gee! [News.com.au]
• Paula Abdul has undergone neck surgery to repair an old cheerleading injury. She's supposedly been in a lot of pain since um, 1987, which maybe made her take pain pills, which maybe made her loopy. [Perez Hilton]
• TV chef Jamie Oliver was talking about free range chickens and gassing chicks when he some kind of Holocaust joke about the Germans, whoops. [The Star]
• Adrian Grenier: Dating an Aussie "weather girl"? [News.com.au]
• Blind item! "Which newly single TV personality tried out his sonorous baritone on young co-eds while vacationing in Mexico? 'He was bouncing between college girls like a pinball,' says our spy. 'His son was there, and it was embarrassing to watch.' Even worse, we hear there were no takers." [Rush & Molloy]
• Mary J. Blige and Robin Thicke will tour together in North America this fall. Will they sing together? A duet could be hot! [Reuters]
• When Alanis Morissette was 15 years old, she opened for Vanilla Ice on tour: "I was instructed not to look him in the eye and that was my first experience of honouring someone’s privacy to the point where you look away when they come near you. I thought, 'Wow, I didn’t think that actually existed!'" [Daily Express]
• Ed McMahon has found someone to buy his home and it's not Donald Trump. [Yahoo News]
• If you like Lil Wayne, Birdman or the Hot Boys, you'll love Cash Money Mobile, the new phone service that delivers ringtones, graphics, videoclips, text alerts and other crap right to your phone. A milli, a milli, a milli. [Reuters]
• Bobby Brown is being sued for failing to pay the legal bills for his divorce from Whitney Houston. He still owes almost $100,000 — can he get if from that country show? [Mirror]
• Tennis star James Blake talks about going to high school with John Mayer: "Just about every day he was at my house, and we'd play Nintendo games… I was about five feet tall wearing a back brace [due to scoliosis]… I don't think either one of us was doing that great [with the ladies] in high school – John was still kind of fitting into a niche ... He's more than made up for himself with how he's done since then." [People]
• Christopher Plummer recalls that hilarious time he thought he had syphilis and William Shatner took his role in Henry V. [Page Six]
• It's been twenty years since N.W.A.'s Straight Outta Compton. Ice Cube says: "It was what we saw all around us in Los Angeles. Gangsta to us didn't have anything to do with Al Capone and stuff like that. It's just about living your life the way you want to live it. And you're not going to let nothing stop you." [USA Today]
• A Serbian village unveiled what it says is Europe's first statue to late Jamaican reggae star Bob Marley on Saturday. Apparently the war-torn region prefers role models of peace. [Yahoo News]
• There's an excerpt from Faith Evans' book, and it details the night when she caught Lil' Kim in Biggie's bed. "As soon as I saw a small lump next to Big’s large frame, I flew into a rage, ran over to the side of the bed, and pulled back the covers. I grabbed some chick our of the bed and started beating her ass. At some point, the chick’s wig came off in my hand; It was a short, cropped wig. I stopped throwing punches for a minute to get a good look at the chick I was beating up. It was Lil Kim. She was completely butt-naked, yelling as I pushed her around the room…" [The.Life Files, Gawker]
• "Growing up, there’s a lot of pressure on young women, when you first become aware of your own looks in relation to other women’s looks. You just want to be cookie-cutter beautiful. And sometimes you think, 'Maybe I could change something about myself to fit that mould.' I’m no exception to that. When I was growing up I wanted a nose job because I didn’t think my nose was good. Your face needs to have character if you’re going to be an actor or you’re just kind of a face. You’re not really a person or a personality." — Anne Hathaway. [Daily Express]
• "Making clothes together in our studio makes us feel complete. We probably sound like a group of grannies in a knitting circle but it's the truth and it gives us some control over our visual identity." — Coldplay's Chris Martin. [Mirror]
• "I wrote that song as a stalker. It was raining, and I was sitting there in front of the house, watching her come home from a date after we were divorced. I was imagining what she did on this date, and watching her giving him a kiss. I went home and wrote this song." — Terrence Howard, on the "No. 1 Fan" from his new album. [E!]

[New York, August 21. Image via Splash.]

I do not give a fuck what Jennifer Aniston does with her life. I don't think that she needs a husband and a baby, that she will never be content unless she finds love. But! I do think that someone somewhere does think that. If not about Jennifer Aniston then about themselves. And I think poor Jen has become the receptacle for all the single-girl insecurities. She's got gobs of money, a fit body, great hair and possibly, a skilled cosmetic surgeon. Some women seem to think, "If she can't find love, what hope is there for me?"

And not only does Jen represent the fears single women have about themselves, she embodies the irrational terror the rest of the world has about single women. Despite the fact that she has never made any comments supporting these facts, she is painted in the press as a "high-maintenance, desperate, wannabe bridezilla who'd poke holes in your condom with a pin as soon as look at you." (Ms. Hudson's words.) How did it come to this? And why does Ms. Hudson hold us accountable? Plenty of celebrities find love — in as much as two self-obsessed shallow people can love each other. But if Jennifer Aniston really wanted to dedicate herself to getting hitched, she would probably stop dating celebrities. There must be some independently wealthy businessdude out there (that way she knows he's not after her dough) whom she could date. But the truth is, she may not want a husband and a baby. She may want to shag Brad Pitt, models and rock musicians and move right along. Why do people care so much?

We've Made Jennifer Aniston's Love Life The Pitts [Mirror]

• Ryan Gosling. Rachel McAdams. Back together. [Perez Hilton]
• Ellen blogs about her nuptials! "I had a big, big weekend. I got married to Portia de Rossi! Sorry, John Stamos… this one's taken. The wedding was everything we hoped it could be. I wish I could've invited all of you. But I have some pictures and video I can show you when Season 6 starts on September 8. I can't wait to see them too… it was all a blur. Blissfully yours, The just married Mrs. DeGeneres." [ET]
• LeRoi Moore, the sax player in the Dave Matthews Band, has died. He was injured in an ATV accident June 30 and suffered a punctured lung and broken ribs. Sudden complications from that accident sent him to the hospital yesterday, where he passed away unexpectedly. He was 46. [TMZ]
• Here's the latest on the Aniston/Mayer breakup: A source says, "She is so intent on getting married and having children, he felt hemmed in. After a 20-minute phone conversation, he just said, 'I can't take it any more,' and hung up. Then he texted, 'That's it - the end.'" Pretty please, can this be THE END of reports about these two? [Mirror]

• Madonna drank "Crack Baby" shots on her birthday, which are made with vodka and champagne. Blech. [Page Six]
• Elizabeth Taylor is back home and doing well after being hospitalized. She's planning trips to Europe and Hawaii and weighing in on holiday packaging for her perfume line White Diamonds. Be well, Liz! [Yahoo News]
• What you didn't see on The Hills: Heidi and Spencer running their mouths. Oh, and apparently Lauren went out with Doug Reinhardt back when she was in high school. [E!]
• Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham is preparing to sue a U.K. magazine over an article claiming she's "hooked on sex and diet pills." Apparently she doesn't take diet pills. No word on the sex. [Yahoo News]
• Michael Phelps' Saturday night race pulled a hell of a lot of viewers for NBC, but The Golden Girls is still the most-watched Saturday night show of the last 18 years. Thank you for being a friend! [Yahoo News]
• BTdubs, swimmer Amanda Beard is not dating Michael Phelps. "Ew, no!" she says. [MSNBC]
• Revealed! Jessica Alba's baby weight-loss plan! Low-fat, low-carb diet! Core exercises! Cardio and circuit training! Working out with a girlfriend! Kill me now! [People]
• Sharon Stone, 50, is dating a dude named Chase who is 24. That is all. [Perez Hilton]
• This report says that Balthazar Getty's wife Rosetta is convinced he started hooking up with Sienna when he and Rosetta were still together. Sick of this story yet? [Mirror]
• Chris Martin says he'll never trash a hotel room — because he used to clean them. "When you’re a cleaner and you walk into a trashed room, it’s truly annoying… Spare a thought for the poor schmuck cleaning the room." [The Sun]
• Amy Winehouse has booked into a rehab clinic just a short drive from Blake Incarcerated's jail. [The Sun]
• The Australian men's sailing team won a gold medal yesterday after getting a good luck call from Nicole Kidman. The guy didn't pick up at first: True story! [People]
• Theyyyyy're here! Poltergeist remake, in the works. Stay away from the light, Carole Anne! [Variety]
• Leona Lewis, Mariah Carey, Beyoncé, Miley Cyrus and Rihanna have teamed up for a charity track, "Just Stand Up." There will be a Just Stand Up To Cancer TV special on September 5; the song should hit iTunes a few days earlier. [The Sun]
• Apparently Sir Bob Geldof has been dealing with the stress from daughter Peaches' antics by going dancing. Sometimes what they call "gossip" isn't. [The Sun]
• A sneak peek of Sanjaya's Nationwide Mutual Insurance commercial, in which he has lots of different hairstyles. [People]
• Luke Wilson might be dating a Yale-educated lawyer named Meg Simpson. Stay Tuned. [Village Voice]
• James Hetfield of Metallica erected a fence on his California property which blocks access to a fire road used by hikers and equestrians. Kill 'em all! [UPI]
• Jessica Simpson is doing beer ads for Dallas' Stampede Brewing Co. Classy. [Yahoo News]
• Spotted: Al Pacino wearing blue nail polish. [Mirror]
• Paris Hilton is taking that crappy best friend show idea to London. Sorry, Brits! [Guardian]
• A leading Italian medial group doesn't want ER or Grey's Anatomy to air on Italian television: "These programs are teaching viewers inaccurate views on medicine," says Annalisa Silvestro, president of the National Federation of Medical College. "They are spreading misinformation." It's called entertainment, no? [Yahoo News]
• Roger Moore has a book coming out in November; a memoir called My Word Is Bond. He recalls crashing a boat while filming Live And Let Die, cracking his front teeth and twisting his knee. "There I was, as a fearless 007, hobbling on a cane to my boat and then pretending to be indestructible for the cameras. Who says I can't act?" [AP]
• Pete Doherty's band is banned from the Moonfest festival in Westbury, Wiltshire, next week. The police say: "We carried out an analysis of what Pete Doherty and his band does. What he does as part of his routine is to gee up the crowd. They speed up and then slow down the music and create a whirlpool effect in the crowd. They [the crowd] all get geed up and then they start fighting." Um, ok. [Guardian]
• Gossip straight outta 1992: Kurt Cobain vs. Axl Rose; Stephanie Seymour vs. Courtney Love. [Rush & Molloy]
• Headline of the day: "I Want An IVF Baby With My Fifth Husband After I've Posed For Playboy, Says Surgically Remodelled Brigitte Nielsen." [This Is London]
• Gary Glitter was supposed to be deported to the UK, but he conveniently collapsed in a Thai airport hotel room complaining about his heart. [Guardian]
• "It's very difficult to be a career person and have a relationship. I didn't succeed at doing it at all. It's incredibly hard… I empowered myself by not staying in the thing with Russell [Crowe]. I felt it was going to be repeating some similar patterns that I'd just gotten out of and it was a drag because I was crazy about him." — Meg Ryan. [Daily Mail]
• "It was my first nude scene and it wasn’t supposed to be me. I had a body double and we had some complicating factors with her. It was sort of a last minute thing, where I said, 'I’ll just go ahead and do this.' I was really uncomfortable. This crew that I’d been working with, that knows me when I put on my producer hat, suddenly sees me naked. It was really humiliating." — Anna Faris, on The House Bunny. [ONTD]
• "It's fatal when actresses use Botox. I remember seeing Cold Mountain, and it really looked to me like Nicole Kidman had been using it. Her face was neither sad nor glad — nor anything, she was just like a painted doll. I thought: 'Why would she do that?'" — Britt Ekland, the Bond girl once married to Peter Sellers. [Page Six]

• A month after being diagnosed with breast cancer, Christina Applegate is now cancer-free. "I'm clear," she told Robin Roberts of Good Morning America earlier today. "Absolutely 100 percent clear and clean. It did not spread — they got everything out, so I'm definitely not going to die from breast cancer." She went on to say: "My decision, after looking at all the treatment plans that were possibilities for me, the only one that seemed the most logical and the one that was going to work for me was to have a bilateral mastectomy." Apparently she had the surgery about three weeks ago. She'll have reconstructive surgery in the coming months. Be well! [ABC News]
• Madonna made a 40-minute speech on her birthday and admitted that she was "disappointed" that some of her celebrity BFFs, including Gwyneth Paltrow and Stella McCartney, didn't come to her party. But! Lourdes sang for her, and Guy told her she's beautiful. Is it enough for the woman who wants it all? (Do you think Madge gets depressed?) [MSNBC]
• Apparently Jennifer Aniston is not impressed that John "The Player" Mayer made that speech about her being the smartest most sophisticated person ever. A friend of Jen's says: "He is the biggest jerk ever. How dare he set up a p.r. stunt like that? He should be ashamed of himself and just shut his mouth." [Page Six]

• Now that she's broken up with Lance Armstrong, Kate Hudson has been calling old flame Owen Wilson! "He was frosty at first," says an insider. "He felt betrayed when she dumped him for his friend Lance. But after a while, he caved in and has been sweet to her." Déjà vu all over again. [Star]
• Three words: Beckham The Musical! [People]
• Shirtless pictures of Rafael Nadal. [ONTD via NY Mag]
• Jemaine Clement of Flight Of The Conchords got married! The lucky lady is his long-time girlfriend, Miranda Manasiadis; the ceremony took place in a Los Angeles registry office and costar Bret McKenzie was in attendance. Time to listen to that song Jemaine and Bret wrote for us. [Stuff.co.nz]
• Joshua Radin, the dude who sang at Ellen and Portia's wedding, says: "I cannot imagine topping that experience. I've never played a wedding before, and I probably won't again until it's my own.” Oh and what's this? Pictures in People on newsstands on Friday? Online today? Noted! [People]
• Post-Madonna and estranged wife Cynthia, Alex Rodriguez has been seeing women in Miami's South Beach as well as New York. Don't hate the player, hate the game. [Page Six]
• Britney's custody dispute has been resolved, but it certainly cost her: She owes lawyers over $700,000. [AP]
• Both Donnie Wahlberg and his wife filed for divorce from each other on the same day, within hours. The feeling is mutual. [TMZ]
• Joe Francis of Girls Gone Wild will be tried on federal charges in L.A. in September. Did he deduct $20 million in fraudulent expenses on corporate tax returns? He says his accountant set him up, but he also brought "contraband" (sleeping pills, prescription drugs and $700 in cash) into jail and is being sued by GGW ladies. [NY Times]
• Sadie Frost went over to Amy Winehouse's and "left in the early hours in tatters, wearing the singer’s ballerina pumps and showing off her bra strap through an unbuttoned dress." Also? Intoxicated. Obvs. [The Sun]
• Lily Allen's been airing her business on her MySpace: "Now, the album. It has been finished for a while now. I don't really know what's going on with it… I might go on another holiday as I don't have anything else to do." [Mirror]
• Lily Allen smacked a French woman in the street after the passerby called her a "fucking asshole." Amy and Lily need to get in the studio and off of the streets! [The Sun]
• Leonardo DiCaprio: "The worst dancer ever." [Page Six]
• Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt want to have a "clan" like Brad and Angelina: adopted and biological kids. "We'd be so lucky to have a clan like that," says Heidi. She also says: "I used to want to be a missionary… Go to the U.N. for World Hunger and really, you know, not just go there for a safari, but go there to actually help." Lord help us all. [Yahoo News]
• Heidi and Spencer will get married: Heidi is just "waiting for that big ring." Also, she wants the wedding to air live on TV. She says she won't leave the show, because, "Where would I go?" How about "away"? [Pop Sugar]
• Oh, and by the way, Heidi and Spencer would love to take over The Hills. "I think that maybe Lauren is tired of [being on the show], but we’re just beginning," Heidi says. "We’re not even remotely sick of it." [People]
• Lauren Conrad on The Hills: "The show is definitely reaching its end. It's been so amazing and I've loved most of it, but I think there is going to come a time where I need to live my life for myself and not in front of viewers. I'm young and having fun with it now, but it's not something I am going to be able to do forever, obviously." [ET]
• In news older than your grandma, Paris Hilton and Britney Spears are being blamed for the popularity of small dogs. [Mirror]
• Tori Spelling's bad boob job will make your chest hurt. [Awful Plastic Surgery]
• Uma Thurman is on the cover of the new In Style and says she would maybe have more kids: "If it's meant to happen, it will. I love and adore being a mother." [People]
• Buckle your seatbelts: Peaches Geldof is moving to the U.S. [Mirror]
• Kelly Osbourne says of Peaches: "It’s a bit sad, to be honest. It’s a great big cry for help and people need to stop talking about her and, you know, maybe all she needs is a hug." [Daily Express]
• New couple alert: Bow Wow and Reverend Run's daughter Vanessa. [Page Six]
• Rhys Ifans and Kimberly Stewart wore leather ensembles on a date to famous sushi restaurant Nobu. [The Sun]
• Paris Hilton's boobs: Plastic or push-up bra? [Page Six]
• New Beyoncé album coming November 18. Title: Virtuoso Intellect. [The.Life Files]
• Critics will not be getting advance screeners of the new 90210, which could mean that it sucks. Stay tuned; the show premieres 9/02. [Perez Hilton]
• Brad Pitt is teaming up with Kiehl's but you won't be able to tell. [ET]
• As previously reported, Roseanne has written a post to Jon Voight on her Web site, and it reads thusly: "Your evil spawn Angelina Jolie and her vacuous hubby Brad Pitt make about $40 million a year in violent, psychopathic movies and give away three of it to starving children, trying to look as if they give a crap about humanity as they spit out more dunces that will consume more than their fair share and wreck the earth even more… Miss Jolie says she likes [John] McCain too and hasn't decided who to endorse....huh? Aren't you supposed to be somewhat enlightened, or do you not know that the African daughter you hold in every picture had parents who suffered and died because of the Republican party's worldwide economic assault on Africa over the last few decades since Reagan? It might be good for your Asian and African children's self-esteem to know you support [Barack Obama, a man of color] for the leader of the free world." [Us Magazine]

[New York, August 15. Image via INF]

• John Mayer on his breakup with Jen Aniston: "There's no lying, there's no cheating, there's no nothing. Jennifer Aniston is the smartest, most sophisticated person I think I have ever met. People are different, people have different chemistry. I ended a relationship to be alone, because I don't want to waste somebody's time if something's not right." Hmm, does Mayer The Player have commitmentphobia? [People, UPI]
• John Mayer also says: "I'm sorry that the story's not interesting. But it's about time that somebody stands up for that girl and I think she's great." [OK!]
• Um, there's also video of John making these statements. He actually seems emotional. [TMZ]
• Okay, this report says that though they're going through a rocky time, John and Jen are not over. Then again, it also claims that "the birth of the Brangelina twins has got her down." Ugh. [The Sun]
• This report says that money was an issue with Jen and John. "Jen was tired of paying for everything," says a source. "Cobwebs come flying out of (Mayer's) wallet when he opens it. John liked living like a movie star when he was with her. Jen would never say anything, but you could tell it irritated her." [MSNBC]
• Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi tied the knot! The private ceremony took place at their home in Los Angeles. There were 19 guests, including both of their mothers. [Yahoo News]

• Ellen and Portia both wore Zac Posen. They exchanged rings by Neil Lane. The couple said handwritten vows. Sniff. [People]
• Oooh, you can see Portia's fluffy pink dress here. A source called it a "Cinderella tutu." [Us]
• A crowd of 6,000 people gathered on Chicago's South Side to remember Bernie Mac on Saturday. Samuel L. Jackson spoke at the church and said: "He never turned that kid down for an autograph. He always had time to shake a hand. He was always that kid from Chicago who wanted to make everybody happy and everybody laugh." [CNN]
• Meanwhile, a Presbyterian Church in Memphis is being criticized for holding a memorial for Scientologist Isaac Hayes. [UPI]
• Madonna's 50th birthday was Saturday. She spent the day praying at the Kabbalah center before hitting a London nightclub. [Mirror]
• In other news, doesn't look like Madonna will be adopting that little girl in Malawi. Although we'll surely hear something different tomorrow. [The Sun]
• Meanwhile: Guy Ritchie's script adviser has been charged with possessing more than £100,000 worth of cocaine and cannabis. At least he knows his stuff. [Daily Mail]
• Tyra Banks kept her audience waiting for two hours for a taping of "Celebrating Black Models, Past, Present and Future" while she was backstage "giggling, snacking and chatting with the crew." At the end of the show, Tyra and some other models released black balloons, which, as we all know, kill sea life. Anyway, a source says the whole show was "self-indulgent, narcissistic crap." [Page Six]
• Phil Collins has divorced third wife Orianne Cevey after six years of marriage and two children. He's paid her £25 million, more than Paul McCartney gave Heather Mills. [Mirror]
• Harry Potter star Daniel Radcliffe suffers from dyspraxia, a neurological problem which impairs movement. His spokesperson says his condition is mild and "at worst manifests itself in an inability to tie his shoe laces and bad handwriting." [Daily Mail]
• Courtenay Semel is spilling details about her relationship with Lindsay Lohan: "Everyone thinks Samantha is Lindsay’s first lesbian love, but we were very passionate until her fear of being found out drove us apart," she says. Apparently Courtnenay and LL would do lines of coke, then go home and "fall into bed together." You know, Star was on to LL's "roomate" Courtenay months ago! [News Of The World]
• Courtenay also claims that Lindsay slept with a bunch of dudes to suppress her lesbian urges. [The Sun]
• Was Peaches Geldof's quickie Vegas wedding a publicity stunt for the groom's rock band? The group, Chester French, was unknown in the UK before the wedding; now they have five gigs: Sheffield tomorrow night, followed by Birmingham, Manchester, Edinburgh and London. [Mirror]
• Peaches has gone to visit her father, who will surely quiz her about what the hell is going on. [The Sun]
• By the by, Peaches' new hubs doesn't know who Sir Bob Geldof is, so that should go over well. [Mirror]
• Oh, dear. There's a picture of Peaches licking the face of Mark The Cobrasnake. [Daily Mail]
• Did Peaches get married because she was depressed? Is she still scarred from the death of her mother eight years ago? [The Sun]
• Amy Winehouse has become obsessed with The Wizard Of Oz and is using a sample of music from the film in one of her new tracks. Clearly, she loves the scene that's all, "Poppies… poppies!" [The Sun]
• Gossip Girl gossip: The first season comes out on DVD this week, with an audiobook narrated by Christina Ricci. Except no one likes audiobooks, especially not GG fans. [NY Times]
• Bill Murray jumped out of a plane on Friday. The 57-year-old actor leapt from 13,500 feet with members of the Army Golden Knights Parachute Team. When Murray landed, he said: "I really feel like having a drink." [AP]
• Paris Hilton's extensions were extremely obvious on the red carpet at a recent event. [UPI]
• View said extensions here. [ONTD]
• Jared Leto's band, 30 Seconds To Mars, is being sued by its label, Virgin Records, for not delivering three albums as required by contract. More time in the studio, less time on eyeliner, guys. [AP]
• Blind item! "Which hunk in a summer movie is a violent, closeted homosexual? The heartthrob snuck into his ex's apartment a few months ago and raped him so violently, the ex ended up in the hospital — and the actor paid him $500,000 to keep his mouth shut." [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which oft-photographed socialite is being forced to get a job by her parents? She looks rich but is really broke, and is now looking for modeling gigs." [Page Six]
• Drama in the Black Eyed Peas! Fergie's too busy shooting a movie to commit to a tour schedule. [Page Six]
• Celebs at the DNC? George Clooney, Madonna, Kanye West, Scarlett Johansson, Susan Sarandon, Spike Lee, Quentin Tarantino and Matt Damon all wanna be there when Barack Obama says, "Yes, I can." [Rush & Molloy]
• Kim Kardashian performed with the Pussycat Dolls in Vegas on Friday and used iChat to show boyfriend Reggie Bush what she looked like in her costume. Yeah, she knows how to video chat. Be afraid. [People]
• Everything you need to know about Lo Bosworth's role on The Hills: "A subtle intelligence is Lo's saving grace. It's all there in her withering gaze, usually directed away from her target, and possibly in whatever she's always typing into her cellphone." [L.A. Times]
• Sixteen-year-old Georgia Jagger won't let mom Jerry Hall wear anything inappropriate. "I did take all her miniskirts. I told her one night that her skirt was too short – she came down the stairs and I was like, 'God, Mum, you are 50.'" [Daily Mail]
• Entourage star Emmanuelle Chriqui was one of the many patrons of an L.A. nightclub who came out coughing when someone set off pepper spray. [TMZ]
• Mark Frith, editor of Heat magazine, has a book about what it's like to run a tabloid readers love and stars hate. An excerpt: "Jude Law's lawyer calls again. 'We've reason to believe you're planning to run some photographs that you don't have permission to run. When does the magazine print?' 'It already has.' Silence. Then he tells me our lawyers will be getting a letter." [Daily Mail]
• Somebody stole stuff out of the Dancing With The Stars van when it was in Roseville, MN. [UPI]
• Is Avril Lavigne too sexy for Malaysia? [Yahoo News]
• Patrick Swayze continues to smoke. [The Sun]
• Robert Wagner has talked to a friend about the night Natalie Wood died. [Times of London]
• Headline of the day: "Even when he was kissing me, Warren Beatty could not resist staring at himself in the mirror." [Daily Mail]
• "I'd like an Oscar, I think, and I'd also like to have been the face of a big cosmetics company, like Chanel or one of the others. You know what, I am actually going to say I'd like an Oscar nomination rather than an Oscar. I don't want to jinx it." — Emma Roberts. [News.com.au]
• "I saw The Dark Knight. I'm like, 'That's not my idea of what I want to see in a movie.' I loved The Prestige but didn't understand The Dark Knight. Didn't get it, still can't tell you what happened in the movie, what happened to the character… I'm like, 'I get it. This is so high-brow and so fucking smart, I clearly need a college education to understand this movie. You know what? Fuck DC comics. That's all I have to say and that's where I'm really coming from." — Robert Downey Jr. [MSNBC]

• "i just had to share something that came up today and it made me feel a bit sick to my stomach. so, here's the visual... two paparazzi come up out of nowhere (like usual) and start throwing questions at me... one of them being, 'Hey Lindsay, what do you have to say about people commenting on your sisters implants?' WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Did you really just ask me that? She is a 14 year old girl, and you are a pedophile! i am not judging people that do, but i am just saying that its not something that my family finds necessary to do, especially when you're not even fully developed yet! It is hard enough being 14 years old and you have enough insecurities to begin with, then add being in the public eye... i just find it really disconcerting that