• During a recent interview, BBC reporter Andrew Marr asked Nicole Kidman about "one of the things you haven't talked about before... Scientology - a lot of people would say it is a bullying cult." Nicole stammered, then said:

• "This is just so not... I'm here to publicize Nine. If I was here to do an exposé on myself then I'd be like, ‘Let's go', but I have no interest in discussing any of that." Marr pressed: "You don't want to talk about Scientology?" and Nicole said, "No, I'll talk about Nine." Video here: [Times of London]
• Have Kate Hudson and A-Rod split? Sources say he was partying with other women in Miami this weekend while Kate Hudson was promoting Nine in New York. One eyewitness who saw him with two women said, "He was acting VERY single, and Kate Hudson was definitely not there." Another source added, "They are totally over." [Hollywood Life]
• Kourtney Kardashian gave birth to her son Mason Dash Disick this morning. As you'll recall, "Dash" is also the name of the Kardashian's boutique. [E!]
• Courtney Love lost custody of her 17-year-old daughter Frances Bean Cobain on Friday after a long period of unstable behavior. Kurt Cobain's mother and sister were named Frances Bean's legal guardians. [TMZ]
• Police documents show that Florida's Department of Children and Families is investigating whether there was a "domestic in front of children" involving a weapon at Tiger Woods' house on Thanksgiving, but a spokeswoman for the agency said, "I'm just not able, by law, to give confirmation about whether we visited the children." [Radar Online]
• In her first post-scandal public appearance, Elin Nordegren pumped gas on her way to a Christmas party... and she wasn't wearing her wedding ring. [Radar Online]
• Tiger Woods' private jet flew from Boston to Sweden on Sunday, but only the pilot and two flight attendants were on board. Sources say Elin Nordegren is moving to Sweden, but it's unclear why the jet went without her. [Radar Online]
• Tiger Woods' high school girlfriend Dina Gravell-Parr revealed that he broke up with her by letter. She said of Elin Nordegren, "That could of been me... Thank God it's not!" [Radar Online]
• Tiger Woods skipped his best friend Bryon Bell's recent wedding, but he was still listed in the program as the best man. [TMZ]
• Tiger Woods' mistress Jamie Jungers says, "With all the things that have happened, it's probably in my best interest to move up here [to New York]," whatever that means. [N.Y. Magainze]
• Tiger Woods' 14th reported mistress, Theresa Rogers, has hired attorney Gloria Allred, who is also representing Rachel Uchitel. Rogers is in her 40s, making her the oldest of Tiger's reported dalliances. She also claims she slept with him both before and after he married Elin Nordegren. [Radar Online]
• Looks like Rachel Uchitel won't be suing Joy Behar for calling her a hooker. Gloria Allred released this statement: "We accept ABC's apology and this resolves the matter with ABC. Our action and this apology should also send a message to the public that Rachel values her reputation and that she will consider all of her legal options against anyone or any entity which defames her." [TMZ]
• Sources say Rachel Uchitel has been getting death threats from people who got her cell phone number from a 2001 photo posted on the internet. [TMZ]
• Over the weekend Chris Brown posted a profanity-laced rant on Twitter because he couldn't find his album Graffiti at the Walmart in Wallingford, Connecticut. A Walmart spokesman responded: "We are surprised at the comments online. All Walmart stores nationwide have carried the CD since its release, including the Wallingford store mentioned in the post. This store actually sold through its initial shipment over the weekend. The majority of our stores today are showing they do have copies available." [People]
• You won't miss a minute of Joel Madden's mouth surgery thanks to Twitter. He's been updating everyone on his recovery all weekend. [Radar Online]
• Hailey Glassman has reunited with her mother after an estrangement sparked by her relationship with Jon Gosselin. Hailey wrote on Twitter: "I got the best present for Hanukkah, which was my family n I reunited after all the outside manipulations and lies by 'others' ... This is the 1st yr. I don't care about a gift. My family is my gift n I am so grateful. I'm with my Mom right now,we are doing face masks! :-)." [Radar Online]
• Although some sources are claiming Orlando Bloom proposed to Miranda Kerr, Bloom's rep says, "There is no truth to any rumors of engagement." [People]
• Jude Law was sitting next to Robert Downey Jr. at a Sherlock Holmes press junket when reporters asked about his relationship with Sienna Miller. Jude replied: "The only person I'm in love with at the moment is sitting on my left." [The Mirror]
• David Beckham's London football academy is closing, but the school will live on. A spokesman said: "The David Beckham Academy itself is not ending, this site is coming to the end of its lease but we are planning a more flexible model which will reach communities and schools across the country and internationally." [The Independent]
• Fans have been sending messages of support to the Duggars because their 19th child Josie Brooklyn was born three months early on December 10 and is in the NICU for extended care. [People]
• Hugh Grant said he was drunk when he told an assistant to bid £2 million on an Andy Warhol painting of Elizabeth Taylor, but it worked out for the best: he sold it later for £13 million. [The Guardian]
• Grizzwald "Grizz" Chapman, who plays part of Tracy Jordan's entourage on 30 Rock, is on dialysis three times a week for severe hypertension. He's on a five-year waiting list for a kidney transplant, but he has to lose 75 pounds before he can hae the operation. [E!]
• Taylor Swift had a Christmas-themed 20th birthday party and donated $250,000 to schools around the country as a gift to herself. "Something I wanted to do at the end of this amazing year and especially on my birthday was give back to something I really believe in, which is education," said Swift. "The schools that I went to and the amazing people I got to learn from really turned me into who I am, and I wanted to give back." [People]
• Snoop Dogg shot another guest appearance on One Life To Live. "As I said when I was here last time, I've been a fan of One Life to Live since I was a baby because my momma always had it on," said Snoop Dogg. "It's cool to come back and hang with Bo Buchanan and the people in Llanview and ‘rock out with them." [WSJ]
• Cate Blanchett was an hour and a half late to a performance of A Streetcar Named Desire in Brooklyn because it was rainy and icy and she was traveling from out of town. After the curtain calls she said, "Thank you all for hanging around. The weather conspired against us. There's black ice out there. Be careful getting home." [NYT]
• Coldplay is selling instruments they've used and other memorabilia on eBay in an "End of Decade Clearout Sale" to benefit the charity Kids Company. [UPI]
• Jersey Shore's Nicole Polizzi, a.k.a. "Snooki", says: "We are better than The Hills... It is all real." (Insert your own tanning joke here.) [Us]
• UNICO, the largest Italian-American group in the country, is pushing Pap John's Pizza, Nivea, LG Electronics and Burger King to pull their advertisements from Jersey Shore because it's a "discriminatory, insulting and Italian-bashing program." [TMZ]
• Maxwell is back after an eight-year hiatus. "Sometimes I just get sick of myself," he said. "That's kind of what happened in 2001. I didn't want to see another photo; I didn't want to hear me. I just sort of needed a coffee bean in the perfume shop of who I was, you know what I mean?" [CNN]
• In Esquire's "What I've Learned" column Sting says: "You don't have to be the greatest singer in the world. What you need to be is unique. Whenever you open your mouth, people should know: 'Oh, that's Van Morrison.' Or 'That's Bob Dylan.' Or 'That's Bono.' You want to get to that point where you have a unique vocal fingerprint. Then it's about refining that sound and making it more and more you." [Esquire]
• Zoe Saldana, who stars in James Cameron's Avatar, says, "He's been impacted by interesting women all his life, because you can tell he's in tune with his feminine side. I've learned this about men who write good roles for women - there's a very beautiful sentimentality to them. Their exteriors are sugarcoated with this manly presence, but deep on the inside, there's also this [fragility]." [WSJ]
• Former model Sienna Miller says of V magazine doing a plus-size issue, "I suppose that's something you'd have to say - I couldn't sit here and say, 'No, I'm not [into it] ... but I sincerely believe that that's more beautiful than someone who is poker-thin. I really do. I would love to have boobs to go with my hips, but I don't - that's just not the way the cookie crumbled." [New York Magazine]

• Last night, one of the four buses in Miley Cyrus' tour caravan swerved off the road in Virginia and crashed. The driver was killed, and one other person was injured.

• It's unclear if the driver died in the crash, or if he died at the wheel, causing the accident. Miley's personal bus was not involved in the accident and the concert they were heading to in North Carolina is still on. [TMZ, TMZ]
• This statement was posted on Miley Cyrus' website: "We are deeply saddened by the loss of Bill 'Uncle Bill' Douglas... Members of our tour are like members of our family. Our thoughts and prayers go out to his family in the midst of this tragedy. He will truly be missed." [People]
• A judge threw out a case filed by an Asian woman named Lucie Kim on behalf of Asian-Americans in L.A. against Miley Cyrus for making squinty eyes in a photo. [TMZ]
• Michael Lohan claims he has a contract that could be the "smoking gun" in TLC's case against Jon Gosselin. Lohan says it's a contract between himself, Gosselin, Mike Heller (the son of Jon's lawyer) and Hailey Glassman, which led to Jon being paid for outside appearances that violated his TLC deal, even though it's unsigned. [Radar Online]
• The good news: The final episode of Jon and Kate Plus 8 will air on Monday. Jon and Kate will take the kids on separate outings, and "individually, Jon and Kate reflect on what the past has meant and what the future might hold." The bad news: A TLC spokeswoman says, "We are focusing on the launch of Kate's new series in early spring." [Us]
• In yet another creditor's claim, against Michael Jackson's estate, a company called Video & Audio Center said it is owed $128,482 for installing the TV system at Neverland Ranch. [TMZ]
• Joel Madden says Nicole Richie is home resting after being hospitalized with pneumonia. "So I stepped off the plane after a month out of the country, and basically went straight to the hospital for the week," he wrote on his website. "But don't worry all is well and we are home with no problems." [People]
• Britney Spears' ex Adnan Ghalib has been sentenced to 45 days in jail and 36 months probation after pleading guilty to leaving the scene of an accident. [TMZ]
• Flight attendant Lisa Wilson is suing Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony because she claims their "personal protection dog" "growled and lunged at her," and "headbutted her leg and she fell and seriously injured her back." Wilson claims the dog was "obviously dangerous" and should have been sent to counseling. [Us]
• Ashlee Simpson-Wentz and Pete Wentz's son Bronx Mowgli turned one today. Ashlee Tweeted yesterday: "BX's 1st bday tomorrow!" she wrote. "My angel is going to be a year!! The greatest year of my life." Pete Tweeted: "Happy birthday bx. you dont have twitter and cant read this. Thanks to all my friends that recorded lullabies. cant believe its been a year." [Us]
• Lily Allen, who urged the British government to crack down on illegal file sharing, said in a radio interview, "If someone comes up with a burnt copy of my CD and offers it to you for £4 I haven't a problem with that as long as the person buying it places some kind of value on my music." [Daily Express]
• Carrie Prejean's brother Billy Arnone talked to Radar Online about her sex tapes and said, "If they were put in front of me I'd probably watch it." [Radar Online]
• In other sketchy family member news, Paris Hilton's mom revealed that her daughter wanted to get breast implants. Kathy Hilton said, "At one point [Paris] was like 'I wanna do this and that, I'm so flat!' but then all of a sudden she was like 'I love it. I don't care. I love it.' I'm proud of that; I think that's really nice." [Daily Express]
• Wesley Snipes' is appealing an "unreasonable" three-year prison sentence. He was convicted last year of failing to file his income tax returns for three years, but his lawyers argued today that he should have been granted a hearing to decide whether the trial should have been in New York instead of Florida. During the trial, Snipes explained that he's an idealistic artist "unschooled in the science of law and finance." [AP]
• The IRS issued a tax lien against Joe Francis for about $34,000,000 and now he's asking a judge to order the agency to unfreeze his money because he's on the brink of bankruptcy. [TMZ]
• Roman Polanski's lawyer says his client won't agree voluntarily to being extradited to the U.S. "We also maintain that Mr Polanski did not face a fair trial in Los Angeles," he said. "For all these reasons, among others, his position remains unchanged: he will not accept being extradited to the United States." [Reuters]
• On a radio show Rihanna said of her relationship with Chris Brown, "There are a lot of ... places that we've been to together, music, different things that come up that are reminders of your ex... When [his music] comes on the radio, I don't ... turn it off. I like his music... I've gotten over it, but there are definitely constant reminders ... songs that were our favorite songs, or hit songs." [People]
• Halle Berry, who has experienced domestic abuse herself, says of Rihanna, "Any time a woman frees herself from that kind of bondage and that kind of situation I'm proud." [Access Hollywood]
• Ha. In this video from four yeas ago Taylor Lautner says, "My dad says I can't date until I'm 28, but I'll have to negotiate that one down a little." [People]
• The Roman Catholic Church is bashing Twilight. A Vatican official said, "The theme of vampires in Twilight combines a mixture of excesses that as ever is aimed at young people and gives a heavy esoteric element. It is once again that age-old trick or ideal formula of using extremes to make an impact at the box office. This film is nothing more than a moral vacuum with a deviant message and as such should be of concern." [Contact Music]
• New Moon made $26.3 million during midnight showings at North American box offices last night, breaking the record set by Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. [Reuters]
• Susan Boyle said she was "shocked" when she lost America's Got Talent: "Sure, I mean, I am thrilled for Diversity; they deserved it. But I was working so hard, lost in the midst of all the excitement and yes, I felt the dream may be over after not picking up the winner's prize. Who would not?" [CBS News]
• Dave Navarro says he's a fan of his ex-wife Carmen Electra's girl-on-girl strip/sex tape. [TMZ]
• "You can't make music as a famous person," says John Mayer. "Famous people make really bad records – so I make music as a musician. I've read people say I was the shit, and I've read people say I am shit. I don't have to prove anything any more – all I have to do is play. Now my motivation is not so that people know my name, it's not so I can make money, it's not so I can meet girls – my motivation is to prove to people that you can buck the trend: that it's not an absolute that if you can be really successful, then you're gonna start sucking." [The Guardian]
• Yesterday, Rex Lee, who plays Lloyd on Entourage said crew members "occasionally" make fun of his ethnicity and homosexuality on set. The show's creator Doug Ellin says he's "shocked and horrified" and "will be speaking to everybody before we start filming again in March. It's not something condoned or acceptable." [TMZ]
• We can't handle any more Real Housewives drama, but if you want to know about the "infidelity, booze brawls, computer hacking," and physical threats" involved in new Orange County cast member Alexis Bellino's divorce read on: [Star]
• Derek Hough says his sister Julianne Hough broke up with Chuck Wicks because, "She's 21 years old and her career is skyrocketing right now and it's tough to sustain a relationship, especially with somebody who's so much older than her." [People]
• Ashley Jensen, who recently became a mother, said: "To be honest, I'm stumbling from day to day at the moment. Just getting to grips with feeding and not sleeping. It's all about routine, and it's very all-consuming. I had to feed him before I came out, which is why I was a little bit late, even though he wasn't really due a feed. And now I'm worried about whether my breasts are going to start lactating! You can't be away from him for too long. One thing it has given me is a real respect for womankind. Giving birth is amazing, and such a great leveller. It doesn't matter who you are – whether you're Mrs Beverly Hills with your Botox, or someone living in a caravan in Idaho. You both go through that." [The Independent]
• "I think for me the most satisfying thing is going out with my first headlining tour and having every show sell out. That was something that I never dreamed would be so quick to happen. Putting Madison Square Garden on sale and having it be sold out in 59 seconds. Like I can't believe that. I'm still completely blown away by that." — Taylor Swift [CNN]
• Eva Mendes says she was excited to work on Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans, "Because Werner Herzog has been on my hit list for a while. I think he's a cinematic god and I think he's unparalleled. I think he's so prolific and he's such an iconoclast-you know, he's it. Working with him was a dream come true. I know that [Nicholas Cage] felt similarly. Obviously, I worked with Nic on Ghost Rider-a big popcorn movie-which is nothing like this. But I got to know Nic and the way he works and I really just like him as a person so I knew his personality and I thought, "Oh gosh, him and Werner Herzog together? They're going to kill it." [Maxim]
• Gayle King onOprah Winfrey ending her show: "I think that Oprah always makes the best decision for herself. I really do. And I have a feeling she will come up with some things to do. She has a very full life … We don't need to worry about her filling her time, I promise you that! Life is good for her." [People]

• In her book Still Standing Carrie Prejean says, "I believed then and I believe now that marriage should be a legally recognized sacrament between a man and a woman. If that makes me a bigot, so is Barack Obama."

• She continues, "I was not then, nor am I now, aspiring to be the next Anita Bryant. I am comfortable with all God's children. Civil unions between gay people, at least as a matter of law, have always been fine with me. If asked, I would have told you that I believed that gay couples should have visiting rights in the hospital, just like everybody else." [Radar Online]
• In the book Carrie Prejean also accuses Donald Trump of dividing up Miss USA contestants based on their looks. "Carrie should be ashamed of herself," says Trump. "Certainly I would never do a thing like that, because it would be too hurtful. I don't stand the ones that are less attractive to one side, and the beautiful ones on the other side. It was total nonsense — it was fiction in her imagination... I don't even know how she came up with an idea like that." [Extra]
• Shanna Moakler has apologized for calling Khloe Kardashian a "donkey" on The Wendy Williams Show. "I feel really bad. I shouldn't have said it," she says. "It was just an off-the-cuff statement." [Us]
• Joel and Benji Madden walked out of an Australian radio interview because the hosts tried a stupid stunt to test whether one twin can sense what the other is feeling. Benji was blindfolded and Joel was handed a the picture of Britney Spears getting out of a car sans underwear. Joel said, "I think I'm pretty laid back dude, but you guys are getting on my nerves," and they left. [Perez Hilton]
• Britney Spears addressed the Australian lip-synching incident — sort of. "I hear there is a lot of controversy in the media about my show," said Brit in a statement. "Some reporters have said they love it and some don't. I came to Australia for my fans!" [People]
• Dina Lohan has spoken out about Michael Lohan's near-daily release of private phone conversations saying, "The tapes were from a long time ago, and for a father to stoop this low is unforgivable... My ex-husband has been in and out of jail for 10 years. My children and I gave him a chance to get to know them again, and he clearly blew that chance!" [E!]
• Joe and Katherine Jackson were fighting in court today. Joe is objecting to the two men named as executors of Michael Jackson's will, but Katherine's lawyer says he has no right to object since he was cut out of the will. Joe claims the will is a forgery. [TMZ, TMZ]
• At the Glamour women of the year awards Rihanna said she feels she has a responsibility to speak out for other victims of domestic violence. "I'm really a woman, a human being," she said. "I go through real situations that women all over the world go through every day. It's great to have the opportunity to be a voice for those women." [People]
• Rihanna says her new album helped her deal with her feelings about Chris Brown. "I got to vent because I didn't really talk a lot. I didn't talk to a lot of people about anything I was feeling. I just did it on the record." [USA Today]
• David Letterman's accused extortionist Robert Halderman asked a judge to dismiss the charges against him because he says he was trying to sell a screenplay to Letterman and the so-called extortion was just "a pure commercial transaction." [TMZ]
• While David Letterman made it sound like his affair with Stephanie Birkitt was long over, according to papers filed by Robert Halderman it continued "unabated" into this past summer. [TMZ]
• Ozzy and Jack Osbourne donated $4,500 to the Muncie, Indiana police department where Jack filmed the reality show Armed & Famous so they could buy a new police dog. [CBS News]
• Kelly Osbourne has lost 25 pounds on DWTS but it wasn't easy. "I'm fucking starving right now!" she says. [Us]
• Katy Perry introduced Russell Brand to her parents. "I've had the privilege of meeting Katy's family. I always get along with spiritual people," he says. "For me the things that happen on a higher level are more important than transient things." [Ok]
• Katy Perry wore a bustier and hot pants made from West Ham jerseys while hosting the MTV European Music Awards to impress Russell Brand. He Tweeted: "MY GIRLFRIEND has worn a West Ham basque while hosting the EMA's. What a day!" [People]
• Toni Braxton and Keri Lewis, her husband of eight years, have separated. [E!]
• Shaquille O'Neal's wife Shaunie has filed for a legal separation "with intent to divorce" citing irreconcilable differences. They have four minor children. [TMZ]
• Joss Stone has enraged anti-drug activists by saying, "Weed has been given this evil stamp, but how is it dangerous? It's going to make you laugh your arse off? You might go to sleep? I think alcohol is much more harmful. People beat the fuck out of each other on alcohol. But I don't smoke weed all day long. I live in Devon and hardly ever go to clubs. When I do, I'll drink three or four beers then move on to a vodka. I don't want to take all those horrible drugs. Although some sound fun, so I might dabble now and then!" [Daily Mail]
• Simon Cowell is the top-earning man on prime-time U.S. television with an estimated yearly income of $75 million. [Reuters]
• Levi Johnston says Sarah Palin "doesn't bother me ... Just because she ran for vice president and was governor of Alaska doesn't intimidate me... I wouldn't want her running my country." [ET]
• A judge has ruled that TLC can depose Kate Major in their lawsuit against Jon Gosselin. [Radar Online]
• Jon Gosselin is counter suing TLC for $5 million. [Radar Online]
• On last night's episode of Jon and Kate Plus 8, Kate Gosselin looked back at a clip of a past show in which Jon Gosselin said to her, "When are you going to pull the stick out." Kate says: "Perhaps [that] was a sign of things to come." [Us]
• A judge has granted Jennifer Lopez a temporary restraining order barring her ex-husband Ojani Noa from releasing 11 hours of video taken during their honeymoon. [AP]
• Oprah Winfrey will air a rare interview with Stephenie Meyer on Friday. "Since I'm only doing one interview, better make it really, really big," wrote Meyer on her blog. [People]
• "These jeans are a few days old, but the top is probably fresh because it gets to the point where even I can't stand the air around me. I don't know, my personal hygiene – it's so disgusting!" — Robert Pattinson [Us]
• Katie Price is returning to the British version of I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here, making her the only celebrity to go to the jungle twice. [Daily Mail]
• First Kristin Cavallari dating Audrina Patridge's ex Justin Bobby and now she's dating Audrina's other ex, Tal Cooperman. "It's not for the show. They hit it off and have been hanging out off-camera," said a source. [People]
• Dave Grohl says he always knew Kurt Cobain would die young. "There are some people that you meet in life that you just know that they are not going to live to be a hundred years old. In some ways, you kind of prepare yourself emotionally for that to be a reality." [Daily Express]
• John Cusack says he agreed to star in 2012 because, "I just liked the script... I got offered it and it was definitely the A-plus version of these movies, as far as the kind of movie it was and the budget and the script. Usually these movies go to whoever the biggest box-office star in the world was, but Roland wanted me to do it and he's a very powerful director. It's not easy to get these roles. It would go to Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt, anybody who's the biggest box-office star." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Chiwetel Ejiefor says the paparazzi were ruthless with Angelina Jolie while they were filming Salt. "More so than other people, they were sort of everywhere, and there were a lot of paparazzi and stuff. But I think she handles it incredibly well. I don't really know how she does it, but definitely she is able to do the work but also be very gracious with them, and it's really quite interesting to watch," he said. [BlackBook Magazine]
• When asked if she ever craves meat now that she's vegan Alicia Silverstone said, "Craving is a complicated word... what craving actually is versus what you think you want. There are times that, if there is nothing else around...suddenly a cheese plate goes by, then sometimes I'll think 'Oh, I want some cheese.' But over the years, I've scratched that itch at different times, and I've come to realize that it's not better than anything else I'm eating." [WSJ]
• Jake Gyllenhaal says in his new film Prince of Persia, "There's a whole scene with ostriches in the movie and ... They're all real ostriches, highly paid, and we were all briefed on them for weeks before like 'They're these massive destructive creatures that can tear your heart out with their claws.' I swear to God I never thought of an ostrich this way! ... I walked up to it and one of my stuntmen was in the ring with them, and finally, I was like, "When am I going to be in a fucking cage with ostriches again in my life? I gotta get in here!" So I got in there and they were the sweetest things." [ONTD]
• In an interview about the season finale of Mad Men Matthew Weiner said there's no chance Betty and Don will reconcile. "It's so unambiguous to me that this marriage is over, but the audience seems to cling to the idea that they should be together because we want to believe in those things," he said. "The marriage was not good. It was built on a lie and the lie was exposed. In the end, Don coming clean really damaged his relationship with her, more than the lying, her seeing who he actually was." [Daily Beast]

• Rosie O'Donnell has confirmed the rumors that her five-year marriage to Kelli Carpenter is on the rocks. She said: "Kelli and I love each other very much and we are working on our issues..."

• Rosie continued, "Those are the only words I am ever going to say. Ever. And that is something that has been agreed upon by all parties. But everything's fine and everybody's good and we're still both raising them together. We will both continue to parent them and we're friendly and everything's all right." [Radar Online]
• Kelli Carpenter reportedly took their youngest child (who she gave birth to) and moved into their Manhattan condo a few months ago, while Rosie O'Donnell is staying in their Nyack, NY home with their three adopted children. Sources say Kelli initiated the split because she couldn't deal with Rosie's mood swings. [Radar Online]
• Randy Jackson says Michael Jackson's signature on his 2002 will must be forged because on the date the will was signed MJ was with Randy in New York protesting against Sony executive Tommy Mattola. According to Al Sharpton's rep, he was also at the protest and can confirm that MJ was in New York, not signing the will in L.A. [TMZ]
• A literary agent is shopping a book containing Michael Jackson's "private writings" and drawings. [Crains New York]
• Jon Gosselin is demanding $12,000 an hour to guest-host a Florida radio show. He was offered first class plane tickets and a luxury hotel room but Jon's rep said he should also be paid because, "[Jon's] name and appearance on your show will instantly draw press ... and will be a high point for the show." The rep described Gosselin as "quite funny, sharp witted and interesting." O-rly? [TMZ]
• The lawyer who sponsored attorney Mark Heller's petition to represent Jon Gosselin in Pennsylvania has made a motion to formally withdraw his support, so it looks like Jon may need a new lawyer. [TMZ]
• Carrie Prejean has responded to Miss California USA's lawsuit against her by releasing this statement through her lawyer: "They have proven, once again, that they will use whatever scurrilous accusations they can dredge up – or invent – to try and tarnish Carrie's reputation and her good name. It is both appalling and pathetic to see K2 and their friends in Hollywood try to destroy this young woman simply for standing up for her beliefs." [Radar Online]
• Roman Polanski's lawyers need to get their story straight. One says there's "no change in strategy" and Polanski will "continue to fight extradition." Another says he may voluntarily surrender to U.S. authorities. [AP]
• Joel Madden wrote on his blog: "I keep getting emails from old friends and family asking about a wedding. NO we didn't get married." So Star's new cover story about Joel and Nicole Richie being married by a Rev. Moon over the internet isn't true? [Perez Hilton]
• Regarding Bronson Pinchot's accusations that as a young man Tom Cruise constantly made homophobic comments, his publicist said, "Obviously this is so far removed from who Tom Cruise is as a person, this must have been said in jest." It's a pretty clever statement, considering it's unclear whether he means Cruise or Pinchot was joking. [N.Y. Magazine]
• Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel went to see Where the Wild Things Are in Vancouver, where she's shooting a movie. Justin put his feet up on the seat in front of him and his head on Jess's shoulder. "They laughed a lot," said an eyewitness. "They seem so happy to be back together, to have worked things out." [Ok]
• The status of Usher's marriage to Tameka Foster Raymond has been changed to "disposed," which usually means it's been finalized. [TMZ]
• Amy Ryan gave birth to Georgia Gracie Slovin on October 15, her first child with her fiance, comedy writer Eric Slovin. [UPI]
• A Run-DMC musical is in the works. "Their work speaks to everybody," says producer Paula Wagner, "and the story of their rise to fame is innately theatrical." [N.Y.T.]
• Susan Sarandon has won the Stockholm film festival's lifetime achievement award for her "reflection, seduction and rebellion" in playing many "multifaceted female characters." [USA Today]
• Reggie Miller has obtained a restraining order against Alexander Von Furstenberg, who threatened to "beat him down" because he thinks Reggie hit on his fiancée Ali Kay. [Radar Online]
• Mayumi Heene's former client, Sunda Croonquist, says the family was homeless. They were staying in their work studio and "were living in conditions that were not acceptable", "slept on the floor or couches," and didn't have a bathroom. [Radar Online]
• Hulk Hogan says he considered suicide after Linda Hogan left him but Laila Ali, his Gladiators co-star, saved his life. He explained he took Xanax with rum and had his hand on the trigger of a gun when Ali called him after noticing he looked distracted at work. [CNN]
• Patricia Field called Sex and the City 2: Electric Boogaloo "Star Wars for women all over the world." Um, no. [People]
• Madonna has give Glee the rights to her catalogue and there's an all-Madonna episode in the works. [Entertainment Weekly]
• David Boreanaz was cheating on his wife of eight years, Jaime Bergman, while she was pregnant with their second child this spring. [Star]
• Emma Thompson, who attended the graduation of her adopted son Tindyebwa Agaba from the University of Exeter in July, will return to the school next month to lead talks on race relations. She said, "Exeter is very white and middle class and it needs to be cracked open a bit. I shall be there with my son, Tindy, who is from Rwanda. He had some unpleasant experiences at Exeter, but also some good ones. That's what's great, that the university has reacted with great oomph. They see we do need to open our eyes and doors and see what's been going on with people. I've been very impressed with that and I'll be there for three or four days." [Telegraph]
• The National Organization for Women sent a letter to David Letterman's producing partner Rob Burnett criticizing Dave for creating a "toxic environment" for the women he works with. Burnett defended Letterman, saying many women hold positions of power at their production company, no one has ever accused him of sexual harassment, and the scandal "did not stem from a complaint from anyone on our staff, but rather from an alleged attempt to commit a crime" against Letterman [Extra]
• Whitney Houston is selling her New Jersey home, which was featured on Being Bobby Brown for $2.5 million. There are pictures of the house here: [Real Estalker]
• "There are no childhoods any more," Smokey Robinson. "Our kids are indoctrinated from the time they're two years old with the news, the computer, advertising, every single, solitary thing. Our kids are brilliant – they're not stupid. This stuff is touching them. It's taking their childhood. They got too much information too fast." [The Telegraph]
• Alexa Chung says the biggest difference between New York and London is, "The rules in America are very oppressive. There are so many rules that people love to stick by. Like ID'ing you all the time, not letting you bringing a coffee into this venue (laughs). People are just sticklers for rules and they don't let you sneak a sneaky one. Like smoking cigarettes… It seems quite regimented." [Fashion Informer]
• "I equate fame with being a blue alien," says Juliette Lewis. "Some people are like [animated whisper], 'Look at the blue alien, she's so cute!' and other people are like [disgusted sneer], 'Oh my God, don't talk to the blue alien!' And, however they treat you, at the end of the day you're still a blue alien." [The Telegraph]
• Kim Kardashian, who recently turned 29, says, "I'm not going to lie, I woke up this morning feeling a little old! It's my last year in my 20s." [People]
• Kim Kardashian will guest judge tonight's episode of America's Next Top Model. She says, "I'm just a big fan of the show and I adore Tyra... I was so excited to give these girls advice and make a difference for their careers." [People]
• Mischa Barton says, "We have paint parties at my house, and everyone comes over and paints on blank canvases, and just does things for fun," she told us. "My kind of art has always been film. That's my primary interest, and everything else is just a hobby." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Michael Buble, who used to sleep with his bible every night praying that God would make him a singer, says, "As I get older I have a different concept of what God is to me and - it's not that I'm into organized religion - the truth is that I don't know. I'm sorry if that offends people out there, but I'm just being honest, I don't know. So instead of making it about a certain God, I have a relationship with that one thing. The universe. God. You can call it Jesus, you can call it Jehovah. You can call it whatever you want. Buddha if you want. Whatever. When I was a kid I definitely put it out there to the universe and to my God and I prayed that it would happen and it's obvious that it worked." [AP]
• Snoop Dogg says he referenced True Blood in "Gangsta Luv" because, "You know I'm down with it... I love that show. I wish I could be on it. I'd be a hell of a vampire, don't you think? So what's happenin'? True Blood, get at me - Snoop Dogg wants to be a vampire." [MTV]

Ok!
"He's Mine!"
The story is called "Crazy In Love." "After months of steamy, no-strings-attached hookups" Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer "have decided what they want to be to each other: Full time lovers." Jen "had an epiphany" and realized that "not every romantic connection needs to lead to marriage." Although she's "vowed" to get pregnant by her 41st birthday, she doesn't want to pressure John. But she does want him to be the father of her child. Also: Jen's "secret pain" is that her dog, Norman, is sick; he's got joint stiffness and trouble walking, so Jen got him a masseuse. In addition, he eats organic white meat chicken and organic rice. Next: Cameron Diaz and Justin Timberlake are ready to reunite. JT turned to Cammie to get advice about his "crumbling" relationship with Jessica. LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibrian want to start a family, even though they're not planning on getting married. In a random interview with Paris Hilton, she's asked about Jon Gosselin, she says: "I don't know why anyone would care. He just seems like a hungry tiger going through a mid-life crisis." A tiger? Maybe she saw his Ed Hardy jeans and got confused. Taylor Swift and Taylor Lautner are planning a romantic rendez-vous, but a friend of Swift's says: "It's so funny: They're both household names, but they both have to check with their parents before going on vacation together."
Grade: D- (dying for a cult)

Life & Style
"Kim: I'm Having A Baby."
Talk about cover lies: Kim Kardashian is NOT pregnant. Inside, the mag says: "If all goes according to plan, Kim WILL be pregnant by next October." Next: Are Joel Madden and Nicole Richie married? An insider says the story is 100% false. No secret ceremony! In the "Countdown To New Moon" story, this sentence is key: "With fewer than 20 days until the sequel's release on Nov. 20, bloodthirsty fans are working themselves into a frenzy — and the cast is ready to bite back!" Oh! Rumor Vs. Truth: Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are not engaged. But they are dating. They're staying on the same floor of the Sheraton Vancouver Wall Center, but they have separate 2 bedroom suites. Moving along… "How Britney Got Her Best Body Ever" is a tie-in to the cover line, "Easy Fat Burning Tricks." Guess what these tricks are? She's getting 8 hours of sleep a night, drinking a ton of water, eating three normal meals a day. And! She's doing 800 to 1000 crunches a day. Here's Sharon Osbourne on Karl Lagerfeld, who recently said "No one wants to see curvy women." She says: "I have a really good plastic surgeon that could help him out with his face. My god he's ugly." Angelina Jolie has a "deep-seated fear of hugging." She told a British mag: "A handshake is all I can handle from people who aren't close to me." An insider says: "Angelina doesn't like her personal space to be invaded. She just has to have it on her terms. She has to decide who will hug or kiss her, and when." Um, that sounds reasonable? Uncertainly and stress about Justin Timberlake are making Jessica Biel drop pounds. The reason? "After more than two years, Justin still hasn't put a ring on it." Also, the mag points out: "Her butt's vanished." (See image 7.) The "Surprising Celebrity Couples" box includes Halle Berry and Donny Wood, Brad Pitt and Christina Applegate, and a picture of a kitten and a chick. (See image 8.) Gisele Bunchen is having a girl, and will decorate the nursery in cream and seafoam green. Victoria Beckham picked her son up from school wearing a $18,726 outfit. (See image 9.) Lastly, in an interview with Amber Riley, aka Mercedes from Glee, she says: "You're not your dress size. You're not your shoe size. You're not your pants size. If I'm going to wear a name tag, it's going to say 'Amber Riley," not 'Fat Girl.'"
Grade: D- (marrying a cult member)

Us
"How Love Saved Britney."
Britney Spears and Jason Trawick went on vacation in Mexico with Brit's dad and her kids. Jason and Britney are really getting along: Brit's dad loves him, Brit's mom loves him and everything is great. Moving on: Michael Lohan flew out to be with Lindsay Lohan after her home was robbed, but he had a photographer with him. Lindsay tells the mag: "There was a paparazzi with him. It's just like, can't you be a father behind closed doors without cameras? I wish he would shut up." And about those reports that Michael wants to kidnap Lindsay and get her into rehab, LL says: "He's the one who needs to see someone — for his addiction to the media." Lindsay also says: "Everything is good. I'm in a good place." Paris Jackson has been wearing a small key on a chain around her neck; it fits into a locket that was placed on Michael Jackson's body as it was interred. Sad. Nadya Suleman lost 145 pounds by doing midnight workouts. And giving birth to 8 kids. In Gosselin "news," with mommy and daddy arguing, the kids are suffering: Mady has been getting into trouble at school for name-calling. The kids try to see how much they can get away with. The sextuplets talk back more, hit more — the boys especially. And: "When Mady gets off the school bus, she'll drop her bag at Jon's feet and walk past without a hello," says a source. "Jon yells at her, but she doesn't seem to care. I think she picked that skill up from Kate." Want details of Khloe Kardashian's prenup? The mag provides a handy chart. (See image 10.) We sorta love this quote from Taylor Swift: "In high school, Halloween seemed like an excuse for all the girls to take off their clothes. My best friend and I decided to go against the trend." She was Chewbacca! (See image 11.)
Grade: D (joining a cult )

In Touch
"Baby Joy." Here's what we learned from Kendra: "Well, a lot of it is TMI. But I was reading a baby book that said right now your breasts are going to leak. And I freaked. So then I was experimenting and I squeezed my boob and stuff came out. I screamed. I felt like a cow!" Next: Angelina promised Brad she would take a break from movies, but she's gone back on her word and signed on for lead role in The Tourist. THAT HUSSY. A "friend" says: "Pretending to be someone else for 14 hours a day makes her problems feel less real." Kate Gosselin's BFF Jamie Cole Ayers has "replaced" Jon as Kate's companion and is "making her happier than Jon ever did." A "pal" says: "They love going out for coffee and girl talk. And sometimes they'll even have sleepovers." Sometimes they fall asleep in the same bed, and "are as close as two women can be." And since they were seen holding hands, OMG are they LESBIANS?!?! An "associate" says: "They're very fond of each other, almost like sisters. They're close enough to hold hands or take a nap together… But it's a platonic love." In an "In Touch Intervention," there are letters to Lindsay and the headline is "We Don't Want You To Die." The letters are from Michael Lohan, Courtenay Semel, and one of the intervention leaders from the show Intervention. This should have been the cover story! They wrote "heart-wrenching" letters to the mag, hoping LL would read them. Michael Lohan's letter calls LL honey four times in two paragraphs. (See image 14, with highlighting by Margaret.) Here's a snippet: "I have held your vacant body in my arms, felt the tears fall down our faces, and I tried every way to make you see what is happening to you." Also inside: Katie Holmes' parents are begging her to come home to Ohio. An insider says: "She used to be so bubbly and positive… The spark is gone." Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer are looking for an apartment in Manhattan. Even though John already owns an apartment in Manhattan. He's moving his stuff into her place in LA, and they're looking for a place to share in NYC. Her rep, naturally, denies this story. T.R. Knight has broken up with his boyfriend of almost two years, Mark Cornelsen, but there are no hard feelings. Lastly: "Is This What 17 Looks Like?" calls out Taylor Lautner and Taylor Momsen who are "growing up too fast."
Grade: D+ (getting married by a cult leader)

Star
"Nicole & Joel: Married!"
Nicole Richie and Joel Madden supposedly got married on October 14th, in their home — along with 45,000 other people — as part of a mass wedding by the Unification Church. No, really. A source says after DJ AM died, Nicole didn't want to spend another day not being Mrs. Joel Madden. While the Reverend Sun Myoung Moon wed bunch of people in South Korea, Nicole and Joel were watching it on the internet with a justice of the peace who was translating and marrying them! To celebrate, two days later, Nicole and Joel went to Teddy's with Benji Madden and Samantha Ronson. Nicole was sitting on Joel's lap and people were congratulating them. Moving on: Lindsay Lohan flew to LA for her court date, but immediately went out partying. She was seen cuddling with Balthazar Getty — and left with him at 1:30am. When she showed up at court the next morning, she had "angry welts" on her arms — "tell-tale signs of cutting herself." (See image 12). After leaving court, she wanted to celebrate not having to go to jail, so she went to Teddy's and got so smashed that she left slumped in the backseat of someone's car. She went back to the same club the next night and kept going up to the DJ booth, where Samantha Ronson was spinning, and an eyewitness says: "Lindsay had circles under her eyes and looked like she hadn't showered in days." Oooh, George Clooney "Knifestyles"! A plastic surgeon who does not treat the Cloons thinks he had Botox, upper and lower eyelid surgery, and filler in his smile lines. (See image 13.) In an exclusive interview with Levi Johnston, the mag asks about him posing for Playgirl: "Are we going to see the full monty?" And Levi says: "I don't know. I'm going to decide that on the fly. I want to keep it classy." This piece has lots of stuff you never wanted to know about him toning up his ass, his manscaping and his "dream job," which is "maybe getting into acting." Kill me now. Next, the mag claims that Mary-Kate Olsen's boyfriend, Nate Lowman, proposed to her while they were on vacation in Paris. The ring was hidden in a truffle box. Katie Holmes gave James Van Der Beek Cameron Diaz's email address, and Dawson and Cammie have been "cyberflirting." Blind item: "Which dancing hunk would rather be doing the mambo with a guy? Though publicly straight, he's been carrying on an affair with a man for years, and he intends to keep it secret." CoughDonnieOsmond?Cough. Penelope Cruz will have a cameo in Sex And The City 2 as the CEO of an international company — Carrie with catch Mr. Big flirting with her character. At an event last week in New York, Madonna confessed to a partygoer that she's become so self conscious about her veiny hands, she'll wear gloves even when it's not cold out. Kelly Rutherford was at a party in NY where the staff was handing out Godiva chocolates; Kelly would smell them, lick them, then put them down, so as not to ruin her diet. Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen are fighting over where their baby will be delivered; Gisele wants to give birth in Brazil, surrounded by her family; Tom's football season won't be over so he wants her to do it in L.A. and just fly the family to California. Kate Gosselin accidentally left her diary out on her nightstand and now thinks that Jon stole it. Apparently she misses the good sex she and Jon used to have, hates her body and hates Joy Behar for asking her tough questions on The View. (Not only do we not believe she left her diary out, we don't believe she has a diary.) David Boreanaz is a "serial cheater" who allegedly has been hooking up with a NYC event planner. Jodie Sweetin says that when she did her last round of interviews about getting off of drugs, she was on drugs. But now she says "I'm tired of lying." She's shilling a memoir, UnSweetined, though she's been sober less than a year. And she says: "life isn't like a Full House episode. Uncle Jesse isn't going to come into that courtroom and convince the judge to rule in my favor by singing a Beach Boys song... But that's life, and I think I'm finally starting to get it." Lastly: Jessica Biel was so upset about the rumors involving Rihanna and Justin that she flew to NYC to confront Rihanna. But friends say Rihanna is "an honest, upfront person" who has nothing to hide and said she'd show Jessica the pictures of Justin she had on her BlackBerry. But! They never met up.
Grade: C- (listening to The Cult)

• For the love of God. Khloe Kardashian says: "I want to be a skinny pregnant person." Actually, what she says when she's asked about having kids is:

"Honestly, I just lost weight! I want to be a skinny pregnant person, like how my sister Kourtney looks so cute pregnant. I can't be a house [after] I just lost weight." She does sort of redeem herself by saying: "I am always fat no matter how much weight I lose… [My sisters and I] are all curvy and we are all accepting of our body types. I think if I was in Hollywood by myself, I would be so much more susceptible to falling into having an eating disorder." [E!]

• Maybe Khloe shouldn't hear this, but Kristen Stewart says: "You should see my brother; he's, like, emaciated. We both just happen to be really skinny." [Us Magazine via Allure]
• Kim Kardashian will get $50,000 for celebrating her birthday at Tao in Las Vegas. A source says, "Kim is worth the huge fee because she's so hot." [Page Six]
• Headline Of The Day: "Michael Jackson's Giraffes in $100,000 War" [TMZ]
• Sources say the Jackson family has been invited to attend the premiere of This Is It; but Katherine Jackson and other family members insist they have been snubbed. [TMZ]
• Did Nicole Richie and Joel Madden have a secret wedding? Radar Online found out that Joel got a marriage license earlier this week. [The Star via Radar]
• Lindsay Lohan's on probation for DUI and has a court date this morning because she "failed to meet an unspecified probationary condition." [NY Post]
• Madonna on quitting Tracy Anderson workouts: "I learned a lot of great things working out with Tracy Anderson, I did not ditch or fire her. I simply wanted to try a new method of working out when my tour ended. We remain friends." [Page Six]
• Madonna and Carlos Leon threw a party for Lourdes' 13th birthday on Wednesday at trendy NYC restaurant Delicatessen. Lola had red velvet cake. [Gatecrasher]
• Eminem has declined to collaborate with fellow Michigan-er Madonna. She says: "I wanted to work with Eminem. I don't think he wanted to work with me. Maybe he's shy." That must be it! [Avril Lavigne's new man is Dole Food Company billionaire Justin Murdock. Not a sk8r boi. [Daily Telegraph]
• Diddy was throwing money off the stage at a show when his $20,000 diamond studded ring flew off. So naturally everyone was frisked before they left the event, which they didn't like. Guess what? The ring was not found. "He ain't getting' it back," one witness said. "Someone pocketed that, and they probably took it to the nearest jeweler." My guess? Someone swallowed it and is hoping for the best. [NY Post]
• "David Beckham's son Brooklyn is carving out a sporting name for himself... as an American footballer." Coaches at his school have called him a "wonderkid" and a "natural thrower and hard tackler." [The Sun]
• Courtney Love: Reformed Hole and is in the studio recording new tracks. This paper declares: "Should be interesting because she can definitely rock out." [The Sun]
• Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jamie Kennedy are still on and he "has no plans of ruining a good thing." [People]
• Jon Gosselin has reportedly approached awards shows with requests to appear as a presenter — and has been turned down by at least two productions. [MSNBC Scoop ]
• The guy who punched Leona Lewis in the face is an aspiring singer who didn't make it as a contestant on X Factor. Of course. [The Sun]
• There will be no lesbian talk in Anna Nicole Smith's hearing. Adjust accordingly. [Mirror]
• Except you can read about how "Anna Nicole Smith's female doctor funneled drugs to the Playmate to fuel their lesbian love affair" at this link. [NY Post]
• Howard K. Stern was urged to send Anna Nicole Smith to rehab, but told Anna's bodyguard rehab "would kill her." [LA Times]
• Does Donald Trump really not know who Tilda Swinton is? [Page Six]
• So you know how January Jones' rack looks huge on the cover of GQ? "They definitely did some significant retouching," claims a source. But GQ photo editor says: "Yes, they're real. And they're spectacular… People think that a person will look the same in every photograph, but that just doesn't happen… Terry [Richardson] likes to work with harder lighting, and that can create a stronger shadow — that, and body position and perspective could give the illusion that her breasts are bigger. January Jones needed no help. Trust me." [Page Six]
• Jimmy Kimmel and new girlfriend Molly McNearney — who works on his show — had a sleepover. And this is news. News accompanied by a picture of Jimmy "pasty and shirtless" on his balcony, watching Molly leave the morning after. [Radar Online]
• Wood alert: Jesse Metcalfe says that doing sex scenes with Eva Longoria for Desperate Housewives made him "pop a wheelie." [TMZ]
• Whitney Houston is mad at Wendy Williams. [Gatecrasher]
• Kylie Minogue: Spotted making out with her Spanish hunk at a party even though her parents were there. [Page Six]
• Depeche Mode's Dave Gahan denies he said "Thank you very much, Chile" when he was in Peru. [AP]
• Nigella Lawson's back went out, so she put on a corset and ate a chocolate bar. I'll have to try that next time. [Daily Express]
• BREAKING: Karina Smirnoff loves being single. [People]
• Fred Durst got married in July. Then separated a month later. And now he's filed for divorce. [People, TMZ]
• A column called "A Night Of Round Table With Monty Python" is predictably full of weird jokes. [NY Times]
• The new cast of Celebrity Apprentice includes Darryl Strawberry, Rod Blagojevich, Sinbad, Sharon Osbourne, Bret Michaels, Cyndi Lauper, Holly Robinson Peete, Carol Leifer, (who wrote for Seinfeld and whom the character of Elaine was based on), wrestlers Goldberg and Maria Kanellis, chef Curtis Stone and Olympic gold-medal swimmer Summer Sanders. [NY Post]
• "At the age of eight I discovered that I could write songs. My dad used to take them to the notary and register them so that nobody could steal them from me. Who does that? What parent takes a treasure in his child's scribbles?" — Shakira. [Guardian]
• "Before my third album, they warned me that if nothing really happened, they were going to drop me. I knew it was my last chance, so I took control. I started to get more involved with production. I started to use my own influences. My music was influenced more by the Anglo-Saxons than the local tropical or Latin roots. When I was singing in Spanish, I had a more rock'n'roll attitude. I was very inflexible, very rigid in many aspects. There were things that would be completely unacceptable to me, like wearing a leotard, or showing my legs. I was more of a purist then." — Shakira. [Guardian]
• "I envisioned that as my life: staying in academia to make a living and then taking summers off to write my novels. I understand the self-loathing and the resentment, and the discipline that it takes to sit down in front of a typewriter or computer every single day, whether it's going well or not going well … I didn't need to research how to be a professor [for Californication's third season] because I'd already been a teaching assistant when I was pursuing my Ph.D.; it was a very clear memory." — Former Yale doctoral student David Duchovny. [The Daily Beast]
• "In Uganda, fat is beautiful. [Jessica is] always scrutinized by the world. Beauty starts from within." — Joe Simpson, Jessica's dad. [MSNBC Scoop]
• "I think that for the first few seasons, it was very clear that Amanda didn't want to be bothered with any type of work. She's at a fashion magazine because she loves fashion — mostly just wearing it. There is a certain reality show with a certain stylist [Newton declines to identify it, but duh, it's Bravo's The Rachel Zoe Project], and I thought, 'Oh my God, that's a glimpse of Amanda's future.' We're going to see that Amanda's love of fashion can help her get ahead in her career. Amanda has a real skill that can actually benefit Mode magazine, apart from looking cute - not that she won't still look cute." — Becki Newton, Ugly Betty's Amanda. [TV Guide]
• "I go outside, and I'm wearing a funky T-shirt and my hair is dirty, and people say, 'What's wrong with her? She needs to invest in a hairbrush. I'm like, don't you get it? I'm not that girl! Like, I never was that girl. It's not like I was really clean-cut last year. The commenters are usually worse than the bloggers. I know what people say about me." — Kristen Stewart. [Us Magazine via Allure]
• "I grew up going to Disneyland twice a week. But I was banned for a year because I went to Disney prison. I was really young so I wasn't responsible for this - it was all my brother's fault. You get a stamp when you leave the park which if you put hairspray on it you can transfer it to someone else's hand, so in the parking lot he went up to somebody and said, 'Hey can we spray hairspray on your hand?0' and we transferred it. And then we go in through the turnstile and there's people there called Fox Fighters or some weird name, They take us aside and I'm like six-years-old and my brother says 'No matter what they say do not confess.' He was like a professional felon at twelve!" — Blake Lively.[Showbiz Spy]
• "It started with the fact that it was my very first week on The View and Barbara and Whoopi asked me if I thought the earth was round or flat. The response that came out was, 'I don't know. I'm trying to take care of my son.' I was really nervous. I was totally outside of my comfort zone and I made a comment that I didn't mean to make. It was a brain fart. I did not know that people were going to hate me as much as they did. I mean like, hate me. My website crashed. But then the women of The View came together and said, 'If we didn't think you could be here, you wouldn't be at this table. We love you. We support you. Don't even worry about it.' I got a ton of e-mails from women saying, I don't care if the earth is round or flat either, Sherri. I'm just trying to pay my bills. That's when I realized that we've gotta give ourselves a break or permission to say dumb things and keep moving. I know what a lot of other women are going through, you try to be perfect for everybody. We've gotta give ourselves a break." — Sherri Shepherd on her new self-help memoir, Permission Slips: Every Woman's Guide to Giving Herself a Break. [Time]
• "I'm old. It's an interesting thing to watch yourself grow older on screen. I was watching Up In The Air and I thought, 'Jesus, who's the old gray-haired guy?' And it was me. I never wear makeup for movies and now it's starting to show. But I'm kind of comfortable with getting older because it's better than the other option, which is being dead. So I'll take getting older." — George Clooney. [Telegraph]
• "I want to hate Megan Fox more than anything. We all do. But I read a bunch of her quotes, and she's witty and smart and carefree. I thought, 'This is the kind of girl I'd love to be friends with' "—Kristen Bell in Women's Health. [Page Six]
• "It was a challenging year. I may have thrown myself off a building. I think work saved me. I'm very grateful I had work." — Madonna. [The Sun]

• Nicole Richie and Joel Madden have welcomed their second child. She announced on her website, "In the middle of night, the very early hours of September 9, 2009, Sparrow James Midnight Madden was born." [Us]

• Sources say Katherine Heigl is adopting a baby this week from Korea with husband Josh Kelley. The baby is about 10 months old and her name is Nayleigh but will be called Leigh. [Radar Online]
• Susan Boyle will appear on the finale of America's Got Talent in her first performance on American TV. [Perez Hilton]
• Video of the altercation between Brody Jenner, Joe Francis, and Jayde Nicole has emerged and it seems to confirm Francis' story that he didn't repeatedly hit and kick Jayde, as she claimed. She throws a drink at him and he grabs her hair, but doesn't touch her again. [TMZ]
• Whitney Port and Freddie Fackelmayer have broken up, but it seems they may have only been dating on The City, as their relationship will be featured on the show. [People]
• Audrina Patridge says she doesn't keep in touch with her BFFs from The Hills. "I barely talk to Lauren. We'll text every now and then, but that's about it," she says. "Heidi, um, keeps asking me to go to Bible study with her." [People]
• Various Jackson family members are angry at Jermaine Jackson for holding a Michael Jackson tribute concert in Vienna, and they say he badgered Katherine Jackson into saying she supports the tribute. [TMZ]
• Kate Gosselin rejected an offer to pose for Playboy for $400,000. "Hugh sent her a letter, but Kate was totally mortified and threw it away!" said a source. "She didn't think it was appropriate because of the children." [N.Y. Daily News]
• This is a story about Victoria Beckham not tipping when she went to Medieval Times in California; more importantly, why was Victoria Beckham at Medieval Times? [TMZ]
• Dina Lohan is mad because TMZ labeled her the "worst mom ever" months ago, but TMZ counters that was a title she won in a poll. Apparently respondents didn't think driving your daughter to a bar after finishing up a stint in rehab was an example of great parenting. [TMZ]
• Ashley Olsen was spotted crying in a restaurant while sitting on boyfriend Justin Bartha's lap. [Radar Online]
• Tila Tequila's lawyer says NFL player Shawne Merriman's claim that he was trying to keep Tila off the road because she was drunk when he allegedly assaulted her is just spin. Her lawyer said, "Shawne Merriman and his advisors have decided that the best defense is a good offense, attacking Tila Tequila in the press with a lot of calculated spin to cover up his illegal and indefensible actions. Fortunately, we as a society will not tolerate a 6'4", 270 pound all-pro NFL linebacker physically assaulting a young lady who is 4'11" and 93 pounds. It is never justifiable to brutally assault, choke, strike and imprison a woman." [TMZ]
• Shawne Merriman's ex-girlfriend Gloria Velez says she doesn't think he could have choked Tila Tequila because he never laid a hand on her during their four year relationship. [TMZ]
• Shawne Merriman had been interviewed for the October issue of Playboy before the incident and the whole thing is about hitting various NFL players on the field. He says, "I'm so dangerous right now I scare myself." [Playboy]
• Hugh Hefner is worth about $43 million based on documents filed with his divorce papers. [TMZ]
• Jay-Z says of working with Kanye West again for his new album Blueprint 3, "The most interesting thing in the studio was Kanye because of Kayne's growth. You got to figure on the first "Blueprint" he was a new producer, so he was just putting in the beats and moving out the way. On this one, he had an opinion about how the songs should sound and it was just great energy that we had in the studio." [AP]
• Jay-Z says he was addicted when he used to sell crack in his Brooklyn neighborhood, but to selling, not drugs. "You become addicted to the feeling, the uncertainty and adrenaline and danger of that lifestyle," he said. [People]
• Well, she certainly doesn't mince words! When Malin Akerman was shown a picture of President Obama shirtless in Hawaii she said, "I might have to have a little bathroom break. Change my panties... Oh, my God. I really need to meet him and mess up his marriage. And mess up mine, too... Have you seen his hands? I'm sorry, but I'm a big hand freak, and those hands could wrap around you twice." [Esquire]
• Sources say Casey Wilson was fired from Saturday Night Live because she was told to lose 30 pounds over the summer hiatus and either refused to or was unable to. [E!]
• ABC has rolled out the stealth advertising campaign for Cougar Town with placards for Jules Cobb real estate featuring Courteney Cox posted in residential neighborhoods. [Time]
• A source close to Karina Smirnoff says of her breakup with Maksim Chmerkovskly, "They both knew when they had been spending more time together recently things weren't going so well... She's not devastated but it obviously hurts, she's angry. She'll always love him and respect him but she always knew in heart of hearts from the beginning of their relationship that he wasn't the one for her." [People]
• Jennifer Aniston says she doesn't care if she's portrayed inaccurately in the media. "It doesn't bug me, if people don't believe it. That's all," she says. "I would just hate it if people actually believed any of it. That's what I would be disappointed with because I don't want crap like that to distract from what I do, my work." [People]
• "I think that's because it's just instinctual as a woman to be the caretaker of your home. Women complain that men don't do enough, but it's your own fault... You train your man to do nothing. You can't blame someone for not knowing what his or her job should be if you don't ask for it right off the bat," says Jennifer Aniston, adding, "I think it's important to have closure in any relationship that ends - from a romantic relationship to a friendship. You should always have a sense of clarity at the end and know why it began and why it ended. You need that in your life to move cleanly into your next phase." [N.Y. Daily News]

• Heidi Montag's Playboy shoot: Not that X-Rated. Sources say the mag had strict instructions when photographing her:

"No nipples, no vagina, no ass." Guess that's where she keeps her good Christian values? [TMZ]

• Madonna has signed on to appear as a mentor in the new season of UK reality show X Factor. Also guest starring: Robbie Williams, Whitney Houston and Rihanna. [Telegraph]
• Kate Hudson is dating Alex Rodriguez and Friday Night Lights actress Minka Kelly is dating A-Rod rival Derek Jeter. Word is: "Things between the two photogenic actresses are frostier than the new stadium's $9 beer." [Page Six]
• Mary-Kate and Ashley: Double-dating, chain smoking, tickling. [Page Six]
• Seth MacFarlane says Family Guy's Stewie is gay. "We had an episode that went all the way to the script phase in which Stewie does come out. It had to do with the harassment he took from other kids at school. He ends up going back in time to prevent a passage in Leviticus from being written: 'Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with womankind. It is an abomination.' But we decided it's better to keep it vague, which makes more sense because he's a 1-year-old. Ultimately, Stewie will be gay or a very unhappy repressed heterosexual. It also explains why he's so hellbent on killing [his mother, Lois] and taking over the world: He has a lot of aggression, which comes from confusion and uncertainty about his orientation." [Gatecrasher]
• When Kourtney Kardashian says she is "so shocked" by her pregnancy, you've got to wonder what she means: She knows how to get knocked up, right? Anyways, she says: We were in the Everglades and I kept feeling nauseous and sick. I just kept thinking something wasn't right. I went to the doctor and he confirmed the news. I was just so shocked." Kourtney has not revealed who impregnated her, but in the past she was linked to skateboarder Scott Disick, whose website notes: "As for girls, he was known as being able to manipulate them into anything." [People]
• Anna Faris and Chris Pratt: Married. And it happened it Bali on July 9. As you'll recall, they were seen on what was thought to be a wedding trip in Hawaii in late July, then her rep said it wasn't true that they'd gotten hitched in Hawaii. Which wasn't exactly a lie. [People]
• Kate Gosselin on Jon Gosselin's relationship(s): "It is hurtful. Very hurtful. To be very honest, the most hurtful part is when his decisions directly affect our children. That's the hardest part for me." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Michael Jackson's "Will You Be There" will be remade with John Mayer, Lionel Richie, Whitney Houston, Usher, Dionne Warwick, Wyclef and Jermaine Jackson. Larry King's wife Shawn is spearheading the tribute, which will either be awesome or awful. [TMZ]
• …And Shawn King has just pulled out of a duet with Jermaine Jackson she was supposed to do in Vienna. [Page Six]
• Jennie Garth basically confirms that Robert Pattinson is dating Kristen Stewart by saying, "I can't say [which New Moon costar] …but he is dating one of them!" Oh man, it's Buff Werewolf, isn't it? Remember when they held hands? [Gatecrasher]
• "David Beckham disappoints Chelsea and Tottenham by insisting AC Milan is most likely destination for England star." [Daily Mail]
• "Beckhams set to swap LA for Italy?" [Mirror]
• Is Denzel Washington — like so many other Hollywood types — looking to make a living in TV? He's considering an executive producer role on a cop drama called Billy Stiles, written by Virgil Williams, who has penned scripts for 24 and ER. [Reuters]
• Kendra Wilkinson and Hank Baskett: Expecting a boy.
  "Whether this little guy is a jock or not, he's definitely going to be a mama's boy," Kendra says. "And there's no doubt he's gonna be a handsome one … just look at his dad!" [People]
• Rebecca Romijn is giving husband Jerry O'Connell diaper duty while she works on new show Eastwick. This column calls him Mr. Mom, but shouldn't it just be "Dad"? [People]
• Glenn Close used to be in Up With People?!?!? [Page Six]
• Michael Douglas has released a statement regarding his son, Cameron, being busted for meth and thrown in jail for heroin: "The family is devastated and very disappointed in Cameron's recent behavior. Any family who has dealt with substance abuse knows how devastating it can be." [People, NY Daily News]
• "A New York City judge says a jury can decide whether the author of a best-selling book about the death of Playboy playmate Anna Nicole Smith defamed her lawyer by calling him a pimp." [USA Today]
• "Anna Nicole Smith pal Howard K. Stern wins OK to sue writer for libel over gay sex video tale" [NY Daily News]
• Mickey Rourke is not impressed when you "make it rain" in the club. [Page Six]
• "Jon Hamm and Jennifer Westfeldt are ready to take on Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell for the title of Longest Dating (and Unmarried) Couple." [Gatecrasher]
• Acting legend Charles Dance, whom you may have seen in Gosford Park, says Paris Hilton's British Best Friend series is "a show for airheads, starring an airhead." Her show is bumping his university drama, Trinity. [The Sun]
• Paul Giamatti will replace Sean Penn as Larry in the Three Stooges movie. Benecio Del Toro will play Moe, and Curly has yet to be cast. [NY Daily News]
• Kim Basinger may play Zac Efron's mom in The Death and Life of Charlie St. Cloud, a flick about a grieving family. [Variety]
• Bachelorette Jillian Harris stands by Ed Swiderski, but other continue to women talk about how shady he is, blah blah blah. [MSNBC]
• Blind item! "Which scorned reality star is in talks with a major R&B singer to have a faux relationship - just to improve her image?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Today some people in traffic tried to sell me a baby. A live human baby. I didn't know what to say. I said a little prayer for the kid. Wow. It all happend so fast. I was trying to figure out if they were serious, and i think when my reaction was not a good one, they just took off. I mean look. Chances are they were joking. The scary part is i really couldn't tell. Maybe i'm just one gullable fool (sic)." — Joel Madden, via Twitter. [News.com.au]
• "Ran into the people that tried to sell me their baby today on melrose.Told me to tell you all they were joking. I thought 10k was a bit high." — Joel Madden. [Twitter]
• "I learned 30 pages of dialogue in German and English and went to the audition dressed like the character. I killed it. I did everything except sleep with the director to get that part" — Diane Kruger, to Playboy on landing her role in Inglourious Basterds. [Page Six]
• "I got stuck being searched in Toronto, and she waited for me. I totally wasn't expecting to see her when I got through my Toronto search, and she was there, patiently waiting. Some people wouldn't have waited. That's all I'm saying." —Eric Bana on The Time Traveler's Wife costar Rachel McAdams. [USA Today]
• "What was I gonna do? I was worried about you. What if you'd been sent to jail or something and I had to alert the studio?" — Rachel McAdams to Eric Bana. [USA Today]
• "You know, in the old days it was very difficult to make movies 'cause you had to have 35 millimeter cameras, which were phenomenally expensive. Or you had to have rich parents that could send you to film school. Nowadays, anybody, any kid or young person with a desire to make films ... (has) access to this equipment. You have great video cameras and the quality's fantastic. You can make soundtracks and do visual effects. You can do very competent computer effects quite easily. There are no excuses anymore. If people really want to make movies, they can go out and do it. And I think we're going see in the next 20 or 30 years a real influx of creativity to the world of entertainment because I believe a lot in the young generation coming along ... the pop culture generation who now can grab these cameras and go make films with them." — director Peter Jackson. [Reuters]
• "I definitely got doughy. I started eating like crazy and drinking dark beer. Between meals on set, I'd eat a No. 1 Value Meal at McDonald's and then Doritos on top of it. It was absolute heaven." — Matt Damon, on gaining weight for his role in The Informant. [Gatecrasher]

• Jude Law got someone pregnant, but not Rachel McAdams' sister Kayleen — her rep (she's a makeup artist) says "She has never even met him." [Star]
• So. The mother of Jude Law's unborn spawn is:

Samantha Burke. She's an actress/model. Naturally. [TMZ]

• A source says that Samantha Burke wants Jude's cash! She expects "a large maintenance payment and financial costs, including a percentage of Jude's future earnings, agreed in writing." [The Sun]
• According to this report, Samantha Burke is from a wealthy family. Also, she looks good in a retro swimsuit. [Daily Mail]
• "Even Seth Rogen Now Hating on Katherine Heigl." He's talking shit about how she talks shit. And dissed The Ugly Truth: "That [movie] looks like it really puts women on a pedestal in a beautiful way." Plus: "I gotta say, it's not like we're the only people she said some batshit crazy things about. That's kind of her bag now." [NY Mag, LA Times]
• Carrie Prejean is planning to sue the Miss California USA organization for slander, libel, public disclosure of private facts, religious discrimination, intentional infliction of emotional distress and negligent infliction of emotional distress. This should be a big old mess. [Perez]
• Need beach reading? Three celebs have "written" new memoirs: Slumdog Millionaire's Rubina Ali; former Playmate Kendra Wilkinson and Good Charlotte's Joel Madden. [NY Daily News]
• Haterade Headline of the Day: "Tony Romo and Nick Lachey rebound with Jessica Simpson look-a-likes while she's left smooching a dog." [NY Daily News]
• Police chiefs suspected of "snooping" at Sarah Jessica Parker's surrogate's home have been arrested. [NY Post]
• Emma Watson is related to a 16th century witch! Her distant relative Joan Playle was excommunicated from the Church of England for witchcraft in 1592. [E!]
• Eminem's new track, "Warning," is an answer to Mariah Carey's song, "Obsessed." He raps: "You probably think since it's been so long if I had something on you I woulda did it by now, on the contrary, Mary Poppins, I'm mixing our studio session down and sending it to mastering to make it loud, enough dirt on you to murder you, this is what the fuck I do... Mariah, it ever occur to you that I still have pictures?" [Yahoo News via E!]
• Amy Winehouse's wedding album: Found in trash. Seems Blaaaaake threw his copy away. [The Sun]
• Nora Ephron says she hopes Julie & Julia will remind everyone that before EVOO, there was BUTTER, which has now been demonized. "I just do not get that at all," Ephron says, since Julia Child and her husband lived into their 90s. "And they drank like fish," she says. "I don't believe that anything has to do with what you eat, if you don't overeat. All these people who think they can cut down on their cholesterol by eating those awful egg-white omelets. There's something I really hate. It is simply not going to make any difference if you have a couple egg yolks in your omelet." [USA Today]
• Will Katie Holmes be in the Sex And The City 2: Electric Boogaloo? A source says: "The character they want her to play is a really ballsy, high-powered company executive who tangles with Samantha." Sometimes you sort of forget she's an actress, for Xenu's sake. [The Sun]
• Jeepin' jeewillickers! Even though Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar named each of their 18 children a name beginning with the letter J, their first grandchild (from son Josh) will be named Mackenzie. Whether Josh and his wife will have 18 kids with M names remains to be seen. [Star]
• So much sadness: This report claims that Michael Jackson may have had collapsed veins and needle marks all over his body — plus — he may have been dead as early as 8:30 a.m. — four hours before paramedics were called. [ET]
• Warrants filed yesterday allege that Michael Jackson was an addict. It's a violation if Dr. Conrad Murray was "prescribing to an addict." [Yahoo News via AP]
• The Michael Jackson autopsy report: Delayed. [TMZ]
• How will TLC balance Jon & Kate's popularity with the family's right for privacy? Network exec Eileen O'Neill says: "It's a sensitive situation and we navigate that as we go along… It's the family's decision to be involved in the show… We want to stay with them as long as they want to stay with us." [Variety]
• What you'll see when Jon & Kate Plus 8 returns: "Jon and Kate have never said they were perfect," Eileen O'Neill says. "You're still going to see two parents that love their kids, but you'll see them parenting separately." [People]
• This columnist asserts that the return of Jon & Kate will help Kate's image. [MSNBC Scoop]
• And, because no one is sick of these people: Jon Gosselin (and Michael Lohan??) brainstormed a new show: Divorced Dads Club. [Page Six]
• Leonardo DiCaprio's ex, Bar Refaeli, has a new man: multi-millionaire Teddy Sagi, who is among Israel's top 30 richest men. [NY Daily News]
• BREAKING: Katy Perry and Rihanna have become inseparable. [Page Six]
• Mario Lopez says the Saved By The Bell reunion was a long time coming: "Everybody knew the 20-year anniversary was coming up. This People story has been in the works for over a year, long before [late night host] Jimmy Fallon started talking about it. We were all excited about it." But what's next? "Everybody is fired up. People keep coming up to me saying 'When are you guys going to do a show?'" [People]
• Mark Paul Gosselaar says of Dustin "Screech" Diamond: That's a disaster on so many levels… I don't know where his head is. I know probably as much as you know from watching things on TV." Plus, Gosselaar says that when he played Zack on Fallon last month, there was a reason he looked young: "I read a blog [where] some guy said, 'Dude, lay off the Botox.' I've never had Botox before. The wig was so fucking tight, it gave me a mini face-lift." [Newsweek]
• Penelope Cruz looked amazing at the premiere of Broken Embraces, but the airline had lost her luggage. [People]
• Penny Cruz: "I love London... but I have difficulties with the rainy weather." [Telegraph]
• Lost spoilers! CHARLIE. [E!]
• Details of the sort-of Seinfeld reunion on Curb Your Enthusiasm, at the link. [LA Times]
• Lawyers are getting involved in that Twilight recasting drama involving Rachelle Lefevre. [E!]
• Viva la revolucion? Benicio del Toro, Bill Murray, Robert Duvall and James Caan were in Cuba yesterday. [Reuters]
• Paul Giamatti calls some scenes from his new film, Cold Souls, "sort of awkward and painful." [WSJ]
• Billy Crudup will join the cast of Eat, Pray, Love the movie, which also stars Julia Roberts, Javier Bardem and Richard Jenkins. [Variety]
• "Bandslam's account of a teenager's awkward attempts to settle into a new school remind former Friends star Lisa Kudrow of her own adolescence." [Telegraph]
• "Singer Peter Andre has accepted "substantial" damages over a newspaper claim he was unfaithful to his estranged wife, model Katie Price." [BBC News]
• "I really felt this film, which had a love affair with boeuf bourguignon, should come out in winter." — Meryl Streep on Julie & Julia. [USA Today]
• "I heard what he had to say and I knew at this moment my life would never be the same. Life no longer seemed like a series of Random events. I also began to see that being Rich and Famous wasn't going to bring me lasting fulfillment and that it was not the end of the journey." — Madonna, on first hearing about Kabbalah when pregnant with Lourdes. [AP]
• "Phoebe was so spiritual and 'out there' — and I wasn't at all. Not. At. All. If anyone was it was Jennifer [Aniston]. She introduced me to certain books that gave me an insight into that world – Phoebe's supposed world – which was a more spiritual realm." — Lisa Kudrow. [Daily Express]
• "My mom and dad were big hippies and I spent time on communes. I just remember the smell of soybeans everywhere. People were making all sorts of strange things out of soybeans: food, clothing, paper, everything. I suppose if I'd gone to military school, maybe I'd be pining for something like Woodstock. But I'm certainly pining for what it represents, and I think that's what Ang was really after with the film." — Liev Schreiber, on Taking Woodstock. [Style.com]
• "I don't watch Jon & Kate, but I still want to punch that Jon douche in the face.his smarmy,fat alcoholic bloat&Ed Hardy wear piss me off" — Rose McGowan. [Twitter]
• "The Jay-Z controversy is great. We couldn't buy P.R. like this. I think Jay-Z said he saw Auto-Tune used in a Wendy's commercial, and that pushed him over the edge." — Marco Alpert, vice president of the company which markets Auto-Tune, on Jay-Z's latest single, "D.O.A. (Death of Auto-Tune)." [NY Times]
• "Fuck you Katy Perry, you fucking stupid, maybe 'not good for the gays,' title thieving, haven't heard much else, so not quite sure if you're talented, fucking little slut." — Jill Sobule. [The Rumpus]

• Samantha Ronson reportedly returned home at 5am last night to find that Lindsay Lohan had been waiting on her stoop for hours. The paparazzi caught Linds crying, demanding to know where Sam had been, and shrieking, "I'm your girlfriend!"

• Lindsay had apparently been waiting with an anonymous friend who Sam kicks out saying, "She's on my property, I don't know her, I want her out." The girl leaves and Lindsay follows Sam into the house, slamming the door behind her. Video here: [TMZ]
• Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush have split, reports US. "Nobody cheated," said a source. Didn't they just go to Africa together? [US]
• A car Katie Holmes was sitting in on the Australian set of Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark started sparking and burst into flames seconds after she got out due to a problem with the car battery. "Katie was very shaken by the ordeal," said a source. "She took the rest of the day off while special effects staff looked over the faults. Katie has filmed scenes since but it has made her think about her safety on set. She will be shooting the same scene at a later date." [The Daily Mail]
• "A source very, very, very, very close to Jon Gosselin" revealed exclusively to RadarOnline.com that Jon is secretly still dating both Hailey Glassman AND Kate Major." Two things: is the source "very, very, very, very close to Jon" Jon Gosselin? Also, if this is how Jon keeps a secret what's his version of a public announcement? Is he going to go door to door introducing us to his new girlfriend? [Radar Online]
• A reporter Kate Major used to intern for at Chicago Now says Kate told her she and Jon Gosselin are together but he "can't talk" right now due to his "situation," meaning his pending divorce and contract with TLC. [Chicago Now]
• Tony Romo has instructed security to keep Jessica Simpson out of his Dallas home. A sign at the entrance to his gated community reads "RED ALERT!!! TONY ROMO HAS MADE SOME CHANGES TO HIS LIST OF PEOPLE ALLOWED IN....JESSICA IS NO LONGER ON THE LIST AND NOT APPROVED FOR ACCESS." [Us]
• Here's some good news: Rihanna's rep says that though she and Chris Brown stayed at the same hotel over the weekend, it was just a coincidence and they're not back together. Maybe she can explain that concept to Robert Pattinson/Kristen Stewart fans too. [MSNBC]
• A parole hearing took place today for the man who killed Kelsey Grammer's sister in 1975 in an attempted robbery. Grammer tried to attend the hearing but his flight was delayed, so he wrote a letter saying his sister was "smart and good and decent," and "I can never escape the horror of what happened" to her ... "Please do not release this man from prison." The parole board decided Karen Grammer's murderer will stay in prison for at least another five years. [TMZ]
• Kelly Clarkson's new single "Already Gone" has the same backing track as Beyonce's "Halo" and Clarkson says it's all the her music producer's fault. "No one's gonna be sittin' at home, thinking 'Man, Ryan Tedder gave Beyonce and Kelly the same track to write to ... no, they're just gonna be saying I ripped someone off," she said. [TMZ]
• The I.R.S has filed a $7,373 tax lien against P.Diddy's Atlanta restaurant Justin's Restaurant. Diddy says it's all a big mistake: the I.R.S. was sending notices to his identically named restaurant in New York that closed a few years ago. [The Detroit News]
• Tito Jackson has confirmed that Michael Jackson's body is at Forest Lawn cemetery. [Entertainment Tonight]
• Debbie Rowe just showed up at the Beverly Hills office of her former boss Dr. Arnold Klein, supposedly to visit another doctor who works in Klein's office. [TMZ]
• Fans at a Jonas Brothers concert this weekend concluded that Joe Jonas broke up with Camilla Belle after he changed the lyrics to a few songs and appeared to cry during the song "Camp Rock." [The Mirror, Perez Hilton]
• Now Camilla Belle's rep has confirmed the breakup explaining, "There is no third party involved and they care deeply about each other and will remain friends." [People]
• BREAKING: Victoria Beckham went to dinner with her hair in a bun. [The Telegraph]
• Sacha Baron Cohen has been threatened by the group of Palestinian terrorists featured in Bruno. A representative for The Martyrs Brigades released a statement saying they are "very upset" and will "respond in a suitable way." [The Telegraph]
• Lost creators Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof dropped some spoilers about season six at Comic Con, which you can read about here: [N.Y. Magazine]
• We're learning more fascinating details about Jennifer Lopez's 40th birthday party on Saturday night. Liza Minnelli, Gayle King, and various Lopez family members were in attendance, and a witness says J.Lo and Marc Anthony "were affectionate with each other and obviously loving the night. Marc's arm was around Jennifer a lot, they'd give each other pecks on the face every now and then. She was clearly pleased with how the night went." [People]
• Entertainment Tonight just figured out that Mischa Barton has been released from psychiatric evaluation (even though Us reported it last week.) [Entertainment Tonight]
• Joel Madden says he's working on a memoir about his experience with kids, relationship, and moving to L.A., "but I don't want to put a book out there if it's not actually meaningful. I'm not going to go there unless I can deliver." [People]
• Robert Downey Jr. will star opposite Zach Galifianakis in Due Date, a comedy about an expectant father (Downey) trying to get to the birth of his first child. Director Todd Philips of The Hangover describes it as "a buddy comedy without the buddies." [Yahoo]
• Robert Downey Jr. said he thinks he and Jude Law have a special chemistry in Sherlock Homes, joking, "It's called circumstantial homosexuality." He added that even in real life, "We just became really close really quickly, because we just rolled up our sleeves and started working from jump." [People]
• Tobey Maguire wrote a letter to Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Senator Tom Harkin saying, "As a parent, I am contacting you because I am deeply concerned that unhealthy school lunches are contributing to our nation's childhood obesity epidemic. My wife and I just had our second child, so this issue is tremendously important to us…Let me ask you please to ensure the Child Nutrition Act provides more fruits, vegetables, and healthy vegetarian foods. Young people deserve healthful food, and I can't imagine a better investment in the future of our country." [Politico]
• "I haven't chosen any other action films since Kill Bill because I felt that everything else just sort of paled by comparison. I don't like to get lulled into some hole that I can't get out of." — Uma Thurman [The Daily Express]
• Megan Fox says she's too afraid to watch horror movies, but she enjoyed starring in Jennifer's Body because, "For me to be able to play something that I would normally be frightened by was really intriguing and interesting... It's cool to see myself being able to scare people because I'm just a little girl." [People]

• Morgan Freeman is planning to marry his 27-year-old step-granddaughter E'Dena Hines, who he raised since she was a child... if you believe The National Enquirer.

• E'Dena is the granddaughter of his first wife, but Morgan raised her with his second wife. It's alleged his long, secret relationship with E'Dena is what led to his ongoing divorce from his second wife. [National Enquirer]
• Jim Carrey is going to be a grandpa! His daughter Jane Carrey and her boyfriend Alex Santana are expecting their first child. "I am very excited," said Jim, "Jane is going to be a great mom." [Radar Online]
• In an interview with Larry King, Michael Jackson's dermatologist Arnie Klein admitted that he gave him Demerol, but only "on occasion" to sedate him. He said he donated to a sperm bank once, but not specifically to MJ, and said at one point that he's not the father of Michael's kids. [TMZ]
• Two sources close to the Jacksons said Janet Jackson tried to stage an intervention for Michael Jackson two years ago with the help of her brothers, but MJ just ordered security to stop letting family members in and even stopped taking calls from his mom. "If you tried to deal with him, he would shut you out," one source said. "You just wouldn't hear from him for long periods." [CNN]
• People couldn't figure out how Michael Jackson's casket got out of the Staples Center undetected, but it has been revealed that it was taken though an underground maintenance tunnel and loaded into a van, which took the casket to a refrigerated mortuary storage at an undisclosed location. Mystery solved! [E!]
• According to California law, Joe and Katherine Jackson get the final decision in where to bury Michael. [MSNBC]
• In a new interview Nadya Suleman talks about Michael Jackson's death, because obviously we're just dying for her input. As for the reports that Michael wanted to adopt her octuplets, she says, "That's funny. That's a rumor." [Radar Online]
• The BBC has received 473 complaints about its coverage of Michael Jackson's memorial service. Most were complaining that two channels were devoted to the service, and others were annoyed that their shows were preempted. [The Telegraph]
• Maureen McCormick says that Eve Plumb is the only Brady Bunch cast member who won't be on Oprah's reunion show next season because she's upset about a lesbian rumor Maureen started as a joke. Eve said through her agent: "No one from Oprah called. We haven't turned down anything. There is no feud." [The Daily Express]
• In what is possibly the most insane lawsuit ever, a woman who calls herself the "most beautifiliest angel lusefer" and claims to be the "reincarnation of Venus Aphrodite Demilo" is suing Hugh Hefner for $3 billion because she claims he's part of a pedophile ring and hid under her bed when she was five so he could assault her. [TMZ]
• Red City Entertainment is suing Lil Wayne because the group allegedly paid him $432,000 for a concert appearance in the Bahamas, but he didn't show up. When police went to investigate, they found Lil Wayne unconscious in his hotel room. [TMZ]
• WTF? Someone vandalized Ed McMahon's Hollywood Walk Of Fame star. [LAist]
• Debbie Matenopoulos and Jay Faires divorce still isn't over because they're fighting over their $4.3 million house. Faires wants to sell it but Matenopoulous is stalling. [TMZ]
• Patricia Arquette has called off her divorce from Hung star Thomas Jane. [TMZ]
• Mariska Hargitay says she was "so scared" when she suffered a collapsed lung on the set of Law and Order: SVU while doing a stunt. "At first I thought I had the wind knocked out of me," she said, so she just ignored the injury for three months. She kept experiencing chest pains and shortness of breath and eventually she realized she needed help when it worsened and she felt, "sort of like someone stabbed me. I went down on one knee and just couldn't catch my breath." [People]
• The sixth season of Top Chef will premiere on August 26 and Natalie Portman will guest star in an episode this season. [E!]
• In her most recent GOOP newsletter, Gwyneth Paltrow writes that she was about to drop a few pounds recently thanks to a juice detox diet. "I feel pure and happy and much lighter," she wrote, "I dropped the extra pounds that I had gained during a majorly fun and delicious 'relax and enjoy life phase' about a month ago... This program allowed me to work and exercise regularly, something I cannot do if I am on a liquid-only detox." [Us]
• Bono has been granted permission by the city of Dublin to install a wood-pellet boiler to heat his Victorian mansion. [The Independent]
• A homeless man Stephen Baldwin let live on his property in New York was busted for heroin possession. Baldwin was trying to help him get his life back together. [TMZ]
• Fifteen dogs will be selected to appear in the national tour of the 101 Dalmatians Musical. Most will be rescue dogs. [USA Today]
• Do you want to look like Heidi Pratt? If so, check out her new downloadable workout series. [People]
• Tom Green and Lindsay Lohan both recently claimed that their Twitter accounts were hacked, but E! thinks it may be a convenient excuse for when a Tweet doesn't go over well. [E!]
• Joel Madden says British Airways never apologized for making him cover up his tattoos before boarding their flight. "I wasn't really mad about it," he said. "But after the fact, I go, That was really wrong, actually." Still, he's not going to sue. [E!]
• You'd think with all the Hitler and Josef Fritzl jokes, Austrians wouldn't like Bruno, but they're embracing the film. "This man is proud of his homeland, so we're proud of him," said one woman, "Austria has a new ambassador. Thanks, Bruno!" [Breitbart]
• Sinitta, who dated Simon Cowell on and off for 16 years says, "On and off, because Simon was a horrible cheat! He was a horrible cheat. He was always disappearing and stuff, you know, and I'd have to work and he'd almost be laughing as he waved me off on a plane to Japan, like: 'Great, I'm going to have a really good time while you're away'." He allegedly hit on her sister and her best friend while they were together. [The Sun]
• Hayden Panettiere says she was bullied in high school: "I was tortured, emotionally tortured by these girls. Every time I came back from filming, it would be me trying to find my way back into the clique. And they weren't having it." [Just Jared]
• Roseanne Barr has decided it's a good time to go after Michael Jackson on those molestation charges. She wrote on her blog: 'If Michael Jackson thought Jordie's dad was ripping him off, he should have stood up in court and fought, like innocent people do. Innocent people do not choose to avoid trials where they are accused of sexually abusing children. They fight, knowing that this is the worst thing in the world to be accused of if innocent. They do not pay millions of dollars to make non existent charges go away! For any celeb to have been a part of glorifying and excusing the unforgivable actions of an obviously guilty predator, I say...Shame on you." [Roseanne World]
• "I'll literally pay three Hollywood readers who don't know me to read my scripts under the radar and give cold comments. And at the early screenings of my movies, I'll hand out questionnaires that can be filled out anonymously so people can be brutally honest because to your face they won't be. I'll take the papers home, read them by myself, cry and go 'My God, that was the coolest scene and everybody hates it!' But that's fine because my goal is to always make it better." — Twilight director Catherine Hardwicke. [Reuters]
• Margaret Cho on the last time she made a wish: "I was eating a breakfast taco at the airport, and I found an eyelash in it. I was so disgusted, but I ate it anyway because I was hungry and tired. I wonder if I still get to make a wish. And if I do, it'd be 'I wish I didn't eat that taco.'" [OK]

Wesley Snipes

Earvin "Magic" Johnson; Miko Brando

Martin Luther King III; Brooke Shields

Jennifer Hudson; Usher

Chris Brown

Mariah Carey

Joel Madden; Nicole Richie; Lionel Richie

Queen Latifah

Mickey Rooney

Smokey Robinson

Al Sharpton; Louis Farrakhan

Lionel Richie; Mike Tyson

Stevie Wonder

The Kardashian Klan

Corey Feldman

[Images via Getty.]

• Rihanna was the big show-stopper at the Met Ball: Celebs cheered when she took the stage to perform. And! At an after-party, guess who RiRi was in deep convo with?

None other than Ms. Anna Wintour. Will someone be gracing the pages of Vogue very soon? [Gatecrasher]

• Have people stopped returning Lindsay Lohan's phone calls? Apparently Pharrell Williams had offered to help her revive her music career, she tells Interview: "He's an amazing guy. He's only been really kind to me whenever I've met him. He said, 'I'd love to make a great record with you, but I want to take you out of all the elements that you're used to. Let's go away. Let's go somewhere nice where you can be focused, and let's make an album there.'" Of course, she hasn't heard from him since and says: "Pharrell, please call me back!" [Daily Express]
• It seems that Kiefer Sutherland did indeed intentionally headbutt Proenza Schouler designer Jack McCollough, who allegedly knocked over Brooke Shields; Kiefer was coming to Brooke's rescue or something. Met Ball dramz! [TMZ]
• Brooke Shields' rep is saying "nothing happened to her" and "Jack did nothing inappropriate. It's not clear what caused Kiefer to do what he did." [TMZ]
• A source says Kiefer Sutherland "was really drunk and he got accidentally bumped by McCollough. They started arguing and then he just head-butted him." Hmm. Kiefer's been arrested for DUI twice. [Page Six]
• More on this in Midweek Madness, but Us magazine is confirming that star of Jon & Kate Plus 8 Jon Gosselin, 32, has been having an affair with third grade school teacher Deanna Hummel, 23. [Just Jared]
• Amy Winehouse's dad is kicking "freeloading pals" out of her hotel room in St. Lucia — her two friends Violetta and Thalia were having "all-day boozing sessions" on Amy's dime. A source says: "Amy performs for the first time in ages at the St Lucia Jazz Festival this week. Mitch knows she has to get it right." [The Sun]
• Paula Abdul is saying pain killers are to blame for when she would "get weird." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Madonna is planning a concert in St. Petersburg, Russia, but local authorities are calling it a "natural disaster" and want "guarantees that there will be no blasphemy." Ha! [Page Six]
• Victoria Beckham wears her sunglasses at night. In the rain. [The Sun]
• Excellent news: Mindy Kaling has a new deal with NBC; she'll continue to write for and appear on The Office next season while simultaneously developing a comedy in which she would also star. She says: "This is my first step in a Transformers-style way to take over the whole world." [Variety]
• Holy gray T-shirt! These pictures of Simon Cowell's new £15million mansion which looks over the Hollywood Hills are absolutely stunning. [Daily Mail]
• In a deposition regarding a lawsuit that Paris Hilton didn't do enough to promote 2006 box office bomb Pledge This, Paris says she promoted the flick "any chance I got." Her lawyer says, "She's the single busiest person on the planet." [AP]
• "Robert Pattinson 'baffled' by fans." [Mirror]
• The weight watchers have moved from Jessica and Lindsay to the King of Pop: Michael Jackson has allegedly been warned that he is "too thin" and needs to gain about 20 lbs before his 50 live shows in the UK. [The Sun]
• Details on Maggie Gyllenhaal and Peter Sarsgaard's wedding! It took place in a cloister of a convent that's a luxury bed and breakfast in Brindisi, Italy; Jake and Reese were there; guests mingled in the garden, which features a pool, wines from the nearby town of Lecce were served. [People]
• Oprah's Twitter stunt of offering everyone in America a free chicken dinner: Newsworthy. [Time]
• Speaking of Ms. Winfrey, you knew this would happen: Susan Boyle will be on Oprah. [Daily Express]
• Yesterday was Chris Brown's birthday; he turned 20 and it was "low-key." [People]
• Mia Farrow is ten days into her hunger strike for Darfur. A few days ago she said: "At this point I don't think about food. I am weaker and I am mostly in bed. I am clear-minded. I sleep less." She also says: "No one voted for President Obama with more excitement and passion than I did, but he's really been lagging and the people of Darfur can't wait." [Guardian]
• Mia Farrow is documenting her fast on YouTube. [Page Six]
• Joel Madden went on a Twitter rant after he and baby Harlow were surrounded by photographers at an airport: "Let me just say shame on any magazine or blog that post pics of us in the miami airport. The photographers were acting like animals. it was the first time i've ever seen my child scared. Not cool for any parent to see. At least in LA they gave us some space. These guys were sticking flashes in her face and bumping in to us and yelling. The most unnecessary force i've ever seen." [Perez]
• Village Voice columnist Michael Musto says Miss California USA once posed with "trannie extraordinaire" Amanda Lepore. He asked Amanda about it, but she says: "I don't remember meeting her. You know how many pictures I take!" Of Carrie Prejean's pageant answer, Ms. Lepore says: "That was stupid. She could never make a career in TV. Gays monopolize everything! She's a dummy! Now she's trying to have churches help her. That doesn't sound promising. But at least she has big tits. She can marry a high roller and have miserable kids that hate her." Musto adds: "All thanks to opposite marriage!" [Village Voice]
• Unfake my heart: A Las Vegas entertainer faces fraud charges for impersonating Toni Braxton. [AP]
• Back in the '90s, Bono wrote a poem about Elvis; it will be broadcast on the UK's Radio 4 on May 13. [The Sun]
• Rachel Weisz will star in an indie political drama, The Whistleblower, which is based on the true story of a female cop from Nebraska who serves as a peacekeeper in post-war Bosnia and exposes a United Nations cover-up of a sex trafficking scandal. [Variety]
• Will Ferrell is in talks to star in a comedy called Neighborhood Watch, directed by the guy who did Wedding Crashers. [Variety]
• Cameron Diaz plays the mother of a sick child in My Sister's Keeper, and although she appears bald in the film, didn't shave her head: She only needed to be bald for one day of shooting. [LA Times]
• Kate Walsh's divorce continues to be a mess. [TMZ]
• Debbie Matenoppoulos will get $3,595 per month in spousal support from her ex, Jay Faires. She currently lives in the couple's home and is responsible for paying all expenses, including the mortgage. [Radar Online]
• Shimmy shimmy ya: Ol' Dirty Bastard will be memorialized in an upcoming documentary and a series of tribute albums, all produced by his cousin Raison Allah Iceman. [Telegraph]
• Blind item! "Which very taken Oscar winner has been sending lots of flowers to a pretty fashion publicist?" [Gatecrasher]
• "There are many duos we wanted to draw from. Something as eccentric as The Odd Couple to Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Withnail and I and Laurel and Hardy. It's the kind of friendship you can only have with someone of the same sex, a person you adore but who infuriates you." — Jude Law on the relationship between Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson in Guy Ritchie's new flick Sherlock Holmes. [USA Today]
• "There's tons of stuff in my name. I mean, if I told you how many Facebook pages have my name on it, you wouldn't believe it. But I am going to join Facebook. I've been doing the MySpace thing a long time and I realize a lot of people are doing Twitter, I just don't want to know what people are doing every single second of their day. I find it a little invasive, but people are into it. To each their own. I don't have the desire to send out messages all day long. That's not me. I'd rather be doing something else." — Zach Braff [Time]

• British Airways employees told Joel Madden that he had to cover up his tattoos if he wanted to board a flight from London to Lisbon.

• He Tweeted: ""yes i covered up to board the BA flight, I didn't want to miss it. And honestly i was embarrrassed all the people were staring and laughing! its not in the rules that i can find.my tatts arent offensive. looking into it. i havent felt this small since the first time i asked nic out." [E!]
• British Airways has publicly reprimanded the employee who made Joel Madden put on a long-sleeved shirt. A representative for the airline said, "we don't understand why the employee took it upon himself to enforce regulations that don't exist." [TMZ]
• More evidence that Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson are back on: both have changed the Facebook relationship status. Sam has gone from "Single" to "Married" while Lindsay's now reads "It's complicated." [The Sun]
• Redmond O'Neal was allowed to leave jail for three hours on Friday to visit his mother, Farrah Fawcett, who is battling cancer. The family paid nearly $1,300 for O'Neal to visit his mother with a police escort. [Entertainment Tonight]
• Despite rumors that John Mayer is dating a 23-year-old model, he says he's single. Mayer explains: "If I had a girlfriend, she would be incredibly offended by me saying, 'I don't have a girlfriend.' That's how you can be sure. I could say, 'I'm not with anybody.' That'd be a death wish if you were the woman." [E!]
• Dev Patel's mom has confirmed that his is dating Frieda Pinto. She said, "First it was the film and now everything else seems to have slotted into place ... Life can't get any better for him. Freida is really beautiful and I am really happy for them." [Mirror]
• Eric Bana's directorial debut, the documentary Love the Beast, is a tribute to his car. [N.Y. Magazine]
• Kim Kardashian had a blonde hairpiece put in for a photo shoot. She says, "I haven't taken it off since, because I'm really loving the look. I've been wearing it around New York and everyone thought it was my real hair! It's making me want to dye my hair and maybe go lighter for the summer. What do you think?" [Kim Kardashian's Official Website]
• Leah Remini's 4-year-old daughter Sophia has taken up singing. "She used to really not want to be listened to or looked at, and now it's like full-on concerts," says Remini. "[She is] like, 'Have you heard me sing this song … and 18 songs on my iPod?'" [People]
• Kate Walsh's divorce from Alex Young is getting uglier. He is pestering her for financial information on the multi-million dollar home they bought together. She says he already has the information. [TMZ]
• Kate Walsh's lawyer has requested a trial date. Alex Young's lawyer says, the case "is no where near ready for trial." [TMZ]
• Pink says she and Cary Hart are "definitely back together" but they're not getting remarried. "We never really legally got divorced. Paperwork for both of us is really annoying," she said. "So we're choosing to be together. Our role models are Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon and Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn - people who just choose to be together every day because they want to be there. And labels have never been our thing, so, we're just diving into that empty swimming pool, headfirst." [Yahoo]
• Jay Leno was hospitalized last week with food poisoning and now he's back on the job, but on his way to an appearance at a comedy club his antique car broke down on the freeway. [Perez Hilton]
• X-Men Origins: Wolverine was supposed to premiere on Wednesday in Mexico City, but it has been postponed due to the swine flu outbreak. [People]
• Rupert Grint went out on the date, which is basically just a good excuse to make Harry Potter jokes like, "What would Hermione think?" and "Can't you magic up a car, Ron?" [The Daily Mail]
• Katie Holmes says to relax, she and Tom Cruise, "like to watch three movies in a row," She says sometimes Tom wants to watch something she's not interested in on the giant movie screen in their home, "But I'll watch it anyway, and then we'll talk about it afterward." [People]
• Esmée Denters, 20, is the first artist signed to Justin Timberlake's Interscope Records. She says Justin is, "like a mentor to me," she says, "He even says he's like my big brother, and I do look up to him like that." [Teen Vogue]
• Robert O'Ryan, the man accused of stalking Shawn Johnson, appeared in court today and the judge set June 11 as the date for the preliminary hearing in his trial. [TMZ]
• Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag committed several wedding faux pas. Guests had to pay $10 for mixed drinks, there wasn't enough food at the cocktail hour, and the bridge and groom arrived three hours late. [TMZ]
• Stephanie Pratt, who was a bridesmaid, said of the wedding, "My parents were there. They were very emotional, like most parents would be." Yes, we imagine most parents would cry if their son's wedding was turned into a reality TV stunt. [People]
• Robert Pattinson says he enrolled in London's Barnes Theatre Company and became an actor to meet girls. His says his dad, "saw a bunch of pretty girls who were going to it. (He) said: 'Hey Rob, you've got to go to that.' That's the reason I still do it!" [The Daily Express]
• Why does this new 30 Rock commercial say "Tina gets played..."? Did NBC executives forget the character's name is Liz Lemon or decide "Tina Fey" would pull in more viewers? [Video Gum]
• Jack Nicholson appeared on a panel at the Ivy League Film Festival at Brown University, and visited his 19-year-old daughter Lorraine, who is a student there. [The Daily Express]
• A new Style network series Giuliana & Bill will focus on how E! News anchor Giuliana Rancic and her husband Bill Rancic cope with living in two different cities. She lives in L A. and he lives in Chicago. [Variety]
• Heidi Klum says of how she loses baby weight after pregnancy, "I honestly don't think, ‘Oh, my God, when I get bigger, what am I going to do with the weight after?' People write crazy things about me, like I put vinegar on salad leaves so I have no appetite. It's not true! I trust my body. My stomach can stretch out to the most enormous place, then it goes back with exercise and eating right. I have good eating habits. Being a model, I had to learn and change my lifestyle. In Germany, a lot of the food that we ate wasn't healthy. A lot of things are fried with creamy sauces. But I've been very healthy over the last 12, 13 years. Besides, my husband always says that I'm sexy as I am. That's what I care most about." [The L.A. Times]

• Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt were married yesterday in front of 200 guests. An airplane flew over the ceremony, spelling out "Spencer Loves Heidi." several times in the air. You know, real subtle like.[People]

• And OMG, you guys, Lauren Conrad attended the ceremony, even though she previously said she wouldn't. That, as Huey Lewis would say, is the power of love. Or something. [USWeekly]
• Betty White has released a statement on the death of her co-star, Bea Arthur who died yesterday at the age of 86: "Bea was such an important part of a very happy time in my life and I have dearly loved her for a very long time. How lucky I was to know her." [People]
• "I was raised in the country. When it was warm outside we were out there in shorts, no shirt, no shoes. I was doing that long before anybody was taking pictures and people like you were seeing it."-Matthew McConaughey [Newsweek]
• Simon Cowell thinks Susan Boyle has her work cut out for her on Britain's Got Talent: "" keep saying to everybody, she's got to win the next stage. It's [up to] her," Cowell says, "She has four weeks to prepare for the biggest time of her life. She's got to sing better than she's ever sung before. But it could all go horribly wrong now because there are so many distractions." [People]
• Jamie Foxx has asked his 14-year-old daughter to write Miley Cyrus a letter in an attempt to make up for the nasty things he said about Cyrus earlier this month. " "I don't want to defend my position as a comedian to be further insensitive to Miley on (U.S. late night show) Jay Leno. We apologised to Miley and reached out to her.. and so we'll move on," Foxx says, "My daughter has written a letter to her. We're going to get that to her and like I said, I don't want to defend it.. you can't defend it." [DailyExpress]
• Ben Stiller has had some pretty bad dates: "The worst? I took a girl to see The Jazz Singer with Neil Diamond. That wasn't a good date movie: 'Orthodox Jew wants to be a singer', you know? I didn't get lucky that night." [DailyMail]
• Salma Hayek held a second wedding ceremony over the weekend, celebrating the day with a masquerade theme. Penelope Cruz, Woody Harrelson, and David Blaine were all in attendance.[DailyMail]
• Pete Townshend wasn't too impressed with Sting's performance in Quadrophenia: "Awful at the time, rather wooden," Townshend says of Sting's performance, "Though I am a huge fan of Sting and the Police as musicians."[DailyExpress]
• Blind Item: "This tweener actor on a hit show needs to get off the coke that was introduced to him by a former tween actor, and now, unemployed drug addict on the same network."[BlindGossip]
• Are the Pussycat Dolls in trouble? Member Melody Thornton apparently took a shot at lead singer Nicole Scherzinger during a recent concert, yelling "Thank you for supporting me, even though I'm not featured," to the fans, while giving Nicole a nasty look. She then pulled a Gretchen Wieners and shouted, "Don't let anyone stomp on your dreams!" [TheSun]
• "You know, how come there are fewer and fewer rock stars, people that a fan can really get into? I mean, I dig a lot of underground music, because there's a sense of community about it. But you get these kids that approach it like it would be cooler to be the guy that does Girls Gone Wild than to be Pete Townshend. That reflects where our society is right now. There needs to be more ambition about being a musician, about what it means to be creating music, about making the record of your dreams."- Billie Joe Armstrong [TimesofLondon]
• "I'm not like all the other celebrities in Hollywood that do a line of coke to lose weight.I could be really skinny, but I don't want to be. I like food. I don't want to be on drugs."-Kelly Osbourne [TheSun]
• Joel Madden was not allowed on a British Airways flight until he covered up his tattoos. [ONTD]
• Beyonce's latest film, Obsessed, opened in first place at the box office on Friday, taking in 11.1 million dollars. [EW]
• Mischa Barton will be returning to television with a role as a "super bitchy model" in a series called A Beautiful Life. "‘It's a younger version of Sex And The City," Barton says. ]DailyMail]
• Mike Judge on his famous voices: "I'm probably pretty close to Hank, I guess, and maybe a little bit of Milton in "Office Space." But when I was doing "Beavis and Butt-head," I kind of felt like after a while I was becoming Beavis, even though I was a lot smarter than Beavis and Butt-head. Or at least I hope I was." [NYTimes]

• Chris Brown has reportedly moved on. His new ladyfriend is actually an ex. She attends University of Mary Washington and they met in Virginia, which is where he's from. His reps deny everything. [Gatecrasher]

• Are Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie trying to adopt another kid, this time from the Philippines? [Daily Mail]
• Is Pamela Anderson getting ready to wed —- for the fourth time? The dude would be her current boyfriend, Jamie Padgett. [The Sun]
• "Someone in the Kardashian family will soon have plastic surgery," says Kim Kardashian. "I can't tell you who, but someone in my family will look totally different and viewers will see it all on the show very soon." Uh, is it Bruce Jenner? [People]
• Suri Cruise is starting her "five day a week Scientology training," which really just means she'll be attending that school started by Will Smith that uses "study technology." But the school does require a "low-carb, low-sodium and low-sugar organic diet." Suri is about to turn 3. [Daily Mail]
• Although Lindsay Lohan is "heartbroken," Lindsay and Sam are still talking,says a friend. Also: Lindsay "barely sleeps, which explains a lot of her behavior. She's exhausted. She can't even sit down for a minute without pacing around the room. It's really sad." [People]
• Lindsay was seen carrying something called Neuro Bliss, which is supposed to "relax neural tissues, to enhance brain activity, focus and provide a sense of well-being." [TMZ]
• This report is titled, "Lindsay Parties The Pain Away." [OK!]
• Madonna is still trying to adopt Mercy James, the child in Malawi. Her lawyer has filed an appeal, and she says "I want to provide Mercy with a home, a loving family environment and the best education and healthcare possible." [Reuters]
• Mercy James is "in hiding" so that her biological father doesn't come and take her; apparently he has only materialized since Madonna showed interest in the child. [Daily Mail]
• News you cannot use: Madonna's son David is a fan of Australian football. [News.com.au]
• Is it mean that Joel Madden posted a picture of a young Nicole Richie on his Twitter and wrote, "This is why I love her folks. Is it not Ron Perlman circa Beauty and the Beast??" [People]
• Hermione's coming to the states: Emma Watson will be attending Brown University. [Daily Express]
• Even though Paris Hilton is with Doug Reinhardt now, she totally talks to her ex, Greek shipping heir Stavros Niarchos, at least three times a week. They probably just discuss the economy and ? [Daily Mail]
• Brace yourself for a Nadya Suleman reality show, which is super close to happening. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Some lady from a rehab center says she had a "secret fling" with Blake Fielder-Civil and is knocked up with his kid. Is it true? Will Amy Winehouse flip her wig? [Daily Mail]
• Amy Winehouse has been working with the Gorillaz instead of working on her own album. [Mirror]
• Amy Winehouse and Duffy are no match for Dusty Springfield, says a friend of Dusty Springfield's. [Telegraph]
• Did Whitney Port leave her job at Diane von Furstenberg, after being beaten out for a promotion by Olivia Palermo? [Page Six]
• Josh Hartnett was seen partying in Miami, so he's clearly recovered from that gastrointestinal problem which sent him to the hospital earlier this month. [UPI]
• Did Jimmy Fallon steal an album cover from the wall of a New York City restaurant and show it off on the Tonight Show? He's claiming it was a prop, but the restaurant has posted a sign, saying: ""Wanted! Jimmy Fallon. A free meal and drink to anyone who can retrieve our record cover back to us safely." [UPI]
• Tim Roth says he was a victim of child abuse. "It happened during my childhood up to my early teens and although I'm not going to say who it was, he's long gone now — and I hasten to add it wasn't my father or mother. Things happen to you in your life, but you don't want to consider yourself to be a victim — you want to be a survivor and the first thing that helps you do that and helps you get through it is speaking and finding your voice." [Daily Mail]
• WTF: New York Post film critic Lou Lumenick wrote: "You know a movie's got problems when the most memorable thing about it is Sienna Miller's moustache. That growth above her lip is clearly visible in two scenes, once in profile." How is that relevant to the movie (The Mysteries Of Pittsburgh) or her acting? [The Sun]
• Sienna Miller has dropped from number 45 to 202 on FHM's Sexiest Women list. [The Sun]
• Trouble in Kate Beckinsale's marriage? [Daily Mail]
• Jared Leto invited children rescued from a life of prostitution to sit in on a recording session with his band, 30 Seconds To Mars. [Monica Seles is opening up about her addiction to food in a new book, Getting A Grip. [Daily Mail]
• Long-haired heartthrob Fabio wrecked a Ferrari on Mulholland Drive over the weekend. Did you know dude is 50? [UPI]
• The Hannah Montana movie took the top spot at the weekend box office with a fairly respectable $17.2 million. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Why the fact that Sylvester Stallone has Russian heritage is breaking news is a mystery. [Daily Mail]
• Sting and his wife have invited a group of friends on an all-expenses-paid luxury trip to Tuscany to discuss "social consciousness." [Daily Mail]
• Here's a profile of Carla Gugino in which she says: "I was so serious when I was young. My mom would come home and say, 'Carla, stop studying." Or, "The dishes are clean enough.' I felt that to be successful I couldn't drink, I couldn't smoke. But acting taught me to have a life that could feed my work.… I had a happy childhood, but I think it also pushed me to try to create my own sense of stability and made me very intense for my age." [NY Times]
• Singer Cassie shaved part of her head, and it looks cute. [NY Daily News]
• Two of Leona Lewis's cousins have been arrested for allegedly beating up and trying to rob some drug dealers. [The Sun]
• Ooh, a retrospective of Ray Liotta's career. He was so hot in Something Wild. [CNN]
• Bjorn Ulvaeus of ABBA says there should not be a sequel to Mamma Mia: "It wouldn't work." [UPI]
• In this piece, Sir Roger Moore talks about all of his ailments — kidney stones, shingles, low heart rate, etc — as well as his hypochondria. [Daily Mail]
• William Hurt will join the cast of the Robin Hood flick which stars Russell Crowe in the lead and Cate Blanchett as Maid Marian. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Shenae Grimes of 90210 was asked who she'd like to come to the set: "Luke Perry, obviously. I mean, come on! We've all been dying for it. I still am but I may have to give up the dream." [Mirror]
• This sentence means nothing to me, but perhaps others will care: The Veronicas are dating brothers from rock bad Carney. [News.com.au]
• Blind item! "Which troubled starlet is getting over a bad breakup with a member of the same sex? We just hope the latter's current boyfriend doesn't get wind of the girl-on-girl shenanigans!" [Gatecrasher]
• "Trying to do an aggressive sex scene is quite difficult. Especially in a public place with a crowd of screaming extras with their little camera phones going click-click, talking pictures of your pasty white ass. I've had my fair share of bedroom antics in films, but they were a little more private." — Jason Statham. [Page Six]
• "I have made several mistakes and one of them was being overprotective of the girls, which has led to an impression that the school is isolating them from society. The majority of girls are thriving, really fulfilling the dream and vision I had. They really have exceeded any expectations I had for them. In spite of everything that's happened, what keeps me inspired and hopeful is the heart of every girl, because they are wonderful, they are magnificent." — Oprah, who has been defending the record of her school in South Africa. [USA Today]
• "He was in an Easter suit, with the Easter basket and the eggs and everything. Once you've seen Billy in a bunny suit, it's pretty hard to think of Easter in any other way." — Christie Brinkley on ex-husband Billy Joel. [Daily Express]
• "I wish I'd never worn an American flag motif swimsuit to the MTV Awards when I was in the Spice Girls. This was me hating myself and hiding under mountains of make-up." — Geri Halliwell. [Independent]
• "I don't think you ever retire from films - films retire you. Sometimes, if you're unfortunate, after your first film. What happens is you say 'I'm going to retire'. And then someone turns up and gives you this script. So you're not retiring. I don't have my next movie and I'm not looking for one. But someone will give me a script possibly and I'll work again. If someone doesn't give me a script that I want to do, I'll retire. But there won't be a great announcement or fanfare of trumpets. I just won't do anything. I'll stay at home and do what I always do, which is cooking, gardening and writing." — Michael Caine. [Daily Express]
• "I don't care. If I don't get food in my mouth, I'm still happy. If my pants are round my ankles, as long as I don't get arrested for indecent exposure, I'm happy. I'm worried about keeping my hair, not how it's combed. […] I don't know that [my kids have] ever seen Back To The Future all the way through. Just as Parkinson's isn't a big topic of conversation in my house, neither is my career. I go down to my office every day and they say, 'Dad's going to work.'" — Michael J. Fox. [Guardian]
• "Only 1,350 rockers were made, and we sold approximately 70 percent in the first two weeks. The collector's edition photo album has sold more the first week than any book we've sold at Cracker Barrel." — Cracker Barrel's VP of marketing on Dolly Parton's merch, which is flying out of stores. [Reuters]
• "I wish we could have shared a bed/but her life was not her own/That's what happens when you date a girl/from Driftwood Nursing Home." — from Bob Saget's comedy act. [NY Times]
• "What I love about Donna is she's never jaded. Donna can kind of go through anything and she still has that girlish quality about her. I think that's something she'd have at any age. That's Donna to me." — Tori Spelling on her return to 90210. [Yahoo News via AP]
• "It's not like we're not talking, we just haven't talked. I love my mother. I've always loved her [and] no doubt she loves me. There's no feud. We simply never meshed." — Tori Spelling. [People]
• "Chris [Martin] is a huge [Sherlock] Holmes nut. He said to me before filming, 'You've got to be gaunt. You've got to be as skinny as you possibly can to play Holmes.' So every time I'm reaching for a muffin I think about Chris and skip the snack. That's been tough." — Robert Downey Jr. [The Sun]
• "I know what you're saying, but it's not a character like in a book or a movie. He's not a bus driver. He doesn't drive a forklift. He's not a serial killer. It's me who's singing that, plain and simple. We shouldn't confuse singers and performers with actors. Actors will say, 'My character this, and my character that.' Like beating a dead horse. Who cares about the character? Just get up and act. You don't have to explain it to me." — Bob Dylan, in a rare interview. [Telegraph]
• "I knew I wanted to marry her pretty soon [after I met her]. It took a while for me to admit it, because it would be crazy to be like, 'I want to marry you' the first day I met her. But I could have!" — Chris Pratt on fiancée Anna Faris. [People]
• "I found I was really sleepy. I almost fell asleep during a Chris Rock show - live, front and center. I thought, 'I need to have a steak.' You have to do what works for you. Some people need meat." — Rachel McAdams, on why she's not a vegetarian anymore. [NY Daily News]
• "There was a television series that never got made by that woman who wrote that big role for Helen Mirren, Lynda La Plante. They wanted me to play – this is how they think of me – a woman who had been beaten up and degraded. I refused. I'm sure the British would not like to see me in a role like that. No way. [As for the film version of my life,] I hated the script. I thought it would be based on the book and not just made up. I had a long talk with my friend, the actress Carrie Fisher, about it and she said: 'You might think you were degraded enough but believe me, for Hollywood not nearly enough. There has to be prostitution, there has to be murder.' So I took it back." — Marianne Faithfull. [Daily Express]

[Santa Monica, April 3. Image via INFDaily.]