The Unequivocal Worst Songs of 2014

At the end of every year, it seems like our society is allowing more and more room for hot garbage to fill our pop charts. We say this not as haters of pop music—we are not one of those finger-waggy assholes who thinks that Katy Perry, for example, does not make "real" music because she doesn't write and produce all… » 12/19/14 2:10pm Friday 2:10pm

Parents Willing to Pay Heaps of Money to Clone Angelina Jolie

Want a baby to look exactly like Angelina Jolie? The star isn't going to be giving you any of hers anytime soon, but TMZ reports that desperate parents (desperate for their kids to look like Jolie, so rich desperate parents) are willing to pay thousands upon thousands per egg in order to get a little Lara Croft in… » 11/27/14 11:38am 11/27/14 11:38am

A Coast Guardsman Proposed on GMA Today (Plus Jason Derulo Was There)

The morning talk show ratings war is still on and in order to win, Good Morning America has made it their mission to win the hearts of Americans by dominating the weird proposal market. Monday's Veteran's Day-inspired entry: getting a member of the Coast Guard to propose to his girlfriend via a performance by Jason… » 11/11/13 3:20pm 11/11/13 3:20pm

Kate Middleton's Uterus Is Making Camilla Parker Bowles an Alcoholic

Some ludicrous story in the Globe says that the bright, sparkling English promise that is Kate Middleton's possibly-occupied womb has sent Camilla Parker Bowles straight to the bottle; she was reportedly sent to dry up in a 7-day detox retreat in Bangalore, India. Camilla and Prince Charles (the latter who has… » 11/30/12 9:00am 11/30/12 9:00am

Of Course Lindsay Lohan Is Voting For Mitt Romney

Even when you live in a snow globe full of vodka and cocaine, the job crisis weighs heavily on your mind, as proven by Lindsay Lohan last night when she went out to promote a ginseng drink in Los Angeles. When asked who she plans to back in the election, she replied: "I just think employment is really important right… » 10/12/12 9:00am 10/12/12 9:00am