Jezebel: Janet Jackson

10 Pop Songs About Female Masturbation

Tracie — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 19:00:00 EST

The video for Pink's newest single, "Sober," was released today with a lot of buzz because it's supposed to depict female masturbation — sort of. The video (which you can see after the jump) actually symbolically shows Pink messing around on a bed with another version of herself. This territory isn't anything new for Pink. "Fingers," off her 2006 album I'm Not Dead, is a more direct approach to the subject. Upon first viewing "Sober," I thought, "Yeah, I liked it better when Björk did this with robots in 'All Is Full of Love.'" Then, I started thinking about all the different songs and videos about female masturbation by women and realized that there's like a butt load of them, and all by mainstream pop stars. Who says that women don't talk about playing with themselves? A roundup, after the jump.

Pink - "Sober"

Björk - "All Is Full of Love"

Tweet - "Oops"

Britney Spears - "Touch of My Hand"

I love myself
It’s not a sin
I can’t control what’s happenin’
‘Cause I just discovered
Imagination’s taking over
Another day without a lover
The more I come to understand
The touch of my hand

Tori Amos - "Icicle"

And when my hand touches myself,
I can finally rest my head.
And when they take from his body,
I think I'll take from mine instead,
Getting off, getting off while they're all downstairs.

Divinyls - "I Touch Myself"

The Pussycat Dolls - "I Don't Need a Man"

I don’t need a man to make it happen
I get off being free
I don’t need a man to make me feel good
I get off doing my thing
I don’t need a ring around my finger
To make me feel complete
So let me break it down
I can get off when you ain’t around

Madonna simulated masturbation during "Like a Virgin" on her Blonde Ambition tour.

Janet Jackson has like a million songs about sex, and I'm sure that a bunch of them include themes of masturbation, but the most popular is probably "If."

How many nights I've laid in bed excited over you
I've closed my eyes and thought of us,
A hundred different ways
I've gotten there so many times

And then of course there's Cyndi Lauper's "She Bop," but for some reason, it's not embeddable from YouTube. So you can watch it here.

Amy Winehouse & Husband: Splitsville

Dodai — Mon, 24 Nov 2008 09:00:00 EST

Amy Winehouse and Blake Formerly Incarcerated: Dunzo. He's left her for a German model; she's admitted that it was never going to last and that they were "only together for sex." Keep in mind that this report comes from a terribly disreputable paper. [News Of The World, Page Six]
By the by, Blake Fielder-Civil's jail sentence appeal was refused by two judges. [The Sun]
"Impeccable" sources say Guy Ritchie is banking $70 million of Madonna's money as part of the divorce settlement. That kind of cash will buy a lot of rounds at the pub! [Perez Hilton]
Oy, Alex Rodriguez is a "Kabbalah school dropout." Madonna will not be happy about this. [MSNBC]
That was quick: Michael Jackson has settled his court case in which be was being sued by a sheikh. [BBC News]
Bloody hell. The Twilight sequel has been greenlit. [UPI]

Brad and Angelina's family is just as cute and perfect in real life as they claim to be. [Page Six]
OMG Barbara and Jenna Bush helped take Sasha and Malia Obama on a tour of the White House and all of the girls totally jumped on the beds! Says Laura Bush: "They're really tall beds; you need to get a running start." [People]
Will Leona Lewis team up with Beyoncé and Jay-Z for Barack Obama's inauguration concert? [The Sun]
Larry Rudolph, Britney Spears' longtime manager, discusses her documentary: "There just came a moment where she decided to get up, brush herself off and move forward. She had hit a low point in her life. She realized that and everybody else realized that. She wanted to get to a better place." Plus, there's A clip! [LA Times]
Britney made an unexpected appearance in court Friday for a hearing on her ongoing conservatorship. [Yahoo News]
Jessica Alba ate Nutella crepes at a downtown Manhattan restaurant, where the staff said the meal was "on the house," so she left a $200 tip. Classy. [Page Six]
In this in-depth piece about Nicole Kidman, we learn that while Keith Urban is on tour and Nic rides around in the tour bus, "She likes to sneak away and go to people's garage sales. 'All I need is a hat, and I go,' she says. She bought little ceramic candle holders at one sale, she says, and embroidered Christmas stockings at another, 'when it wasn't anywhere near Christmastime. I love it.'" [Washington Post]
Johnny Depp's movie took over a highway in Wisconsin; the detour traffic made a road collapse. Whoops! [AP]
Ooh: Today is the day that Boy George is due to stand trial; he's accused of assaulting and falsely imprisoning a male escort. [The Star]
How do people in the Bronx feel about the name Ashlee and Pete Wentz chose for their baby boy? Not impressed. [NY Times]
"Bronx is beyond precious. I'm over the moon with joy," says Jessica Simpson. "Life is a beautiful miracle. Ashlee and Pete are healthy, happy and enjoying every moment." Cool, cool. Do people really say "over the moon"??? [UPI]
Nicolette Sheridan, who ended her engagement to Michael Bolton about three months ago, was seen making out with "Hollywood Lothario" David Spade Friday night. Just let that image settle in. [Star]
Even though Michael Phelps has professed his love for McDonald's, he has a deal promoting Subway. How did the sandwich chain land the deal? [AdAge]
Illeana Douglas has a (laminated) message for the paparazzi, you should click and see. [DListed]
Pleasure principle: Janet Jackson is going to take a break from music to focus on having a baby with her boyfriend Jermane Dupri. [Daily Express]
The economy takes no prisoners: The Tyra Banks Show is moving to the CW's afternoon block after being in syndication for four seasons. Stations have been making budget cuts, so Tyra's production schedule will be cut to 26 weeks from 34. [Reuters]
Natasha McElhone says her mission now, besides acting and providing for her family, is to complete some of the work her late husband, a doctor, began: "to finish his life, to finish his unfinished business." [LA Times]
In this interview with Stephen Colbert, he discusses meeting Eleanor Holmes Norton (the District's delegate in Congress): "I felt so dirty. I felt like a piece of meat. I find being a piece of meat very exciting. In my last life, I think I was a veal cutlet." [Washington Post]
Paris Hilton has been "constantly texting" Benji Madden and trying to show up at clubs where he is supposed to be. [Mirror]
You can buy a silk couch owned by Jenna Jameson on eBay if you have $9,500 to spare. It's pearl gray. [DListed]
Even though the economy is in the crapper, there's stuff celebrities won't give up: Mad Men's Elisabeth Moss needs her coffee; Jessica Biel must travel first class; Hilary Swank gets facials; supermodel/ANTM judge Twiggy must have pink Champagne, and much more [WWD]
Dora The Explorer is getting a new voice: Will kids notice? [Page Six]
Blind items: 1. Which ex-couple — an actor and a model — still share some aspects of their sex life? Both are known to sleep with a famous Lower East Side topless dancer who has a reputation of never going home alone. 2. Which TV host has such good rapport with his fetching female co-host that his wife has correctly guessed they're having an affair? [Page Six]
No Doubt: On tour, summer 2009. [People]
Ben Stiller and Chris Rock: "Israel is better than Hollywood." [AP]
Dita Von Teese is suing Macmillan Publishers, which printed Patti O'Shea's In Twilight's Shadow, a paranormal romance novel about demon hunting. For some reason, Dita's face is on the cover. She certainly did not give permission. [Yahoo News via E!]
Now that the Daily Mail has apologized to David Duchovny for printing a story about him having an affair with his tennis instructor, Duchovny's dropped his $1 million lawsuit. [E!]
Travis Barker is suing the owner and makers of the "defective" Learject that crashed September 19, killing four and leaving him and DJ AM with severe burns. [Yahoo News via E!]
So you know how Michael Lohan — Lindsay's dad — was going to box for charity? The parole board has stepped in, saying the boxing match can't happen because he spent 20 months in prison for attempted assault. Whoops! [Yahoo News]
Will the Golden Globes not happen again this year? Last year is was a writers' strike; this year a Screen Actors Guild strike could cancel the event. [Fox News]
Hollywood veterans and experts from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology are spending $25 million on a lab called The Centre for Future Storytelling. Matt Damon is involved. [Times Of London]
Lily Allen sought therapy after her miscarriage: "I was in a very, very dark place after the whole thing happened. That was the toughest thing I've had to go through in my life. [Therapy] is really, really helping me. I feel it's getting better and everything's going to be OK." [Mirror]
Crazy stuff in this Q&A with Quincy Jones: His dad worked as a carpenter for the black mob, and in 1974 Q had two brain aneurysms. Oh, and Q talks about Frank Sinatra: "[He] was one of those guys where he liked you or he didn't. I got to know the Frank that nobody wrote about, the guy who visited Billie Holiday in the hospital to make sure her bills were paid and who took care of Amos and Andy when they were down on their luck. He was a stand-up guy who didn't see color, and that was rare back then." [Newsweek]
Padma Lakshmi went to see the Foo Fighters and Dave Grohl dragged her on stage; she ended up playing tambourine with the band and getting hit on by Taylor Hawkins. [Page Six]
Meg Ryan's Bel-Air house is for sale, if you have $19.5 million to spare. You get 6,877 square feet, a pool, spa, and guest house. [TMZ]
Cedric the Entertainer may not be the obvious first choice for a Broadway drama, but he's getting good buzz for being in the David Mamet play American Buffalo. [NY Times]
Cops are looking for a "Casanova conman" who claims links to Heath Ledger, Robert De Niro and Keith Urban and has left broken hearts and empty wallets across Australia. [News.com.au]
Wow. A Keith Richards easy listening album. With a jazz version of "Over The Rainbow. Wow. [Telegraph]
A doozy of a headline: "Camilla Admits To 'Letting Herself Go' Since She Married Charles... And Vows To Take Up Tai Chi As A New Year's Resolution." Lulz. [Daily Mail]
Warren Beatty is suing over the rights to comic strip detective Dick Tracy. Apparently he's working on a Dick Tracy TV special? Who knew? [Reuters]
Paul Newman's will was made public and he left his personal property, including real estate, to his wife, Joanne Woodward. His Oscars and other awards went to the Newman's Own Foundation; his airplane and race cars will be sold, with proceeds going to his estate. [AP]
A Smashing Pumpkins show has been postponed; Billy Corgan's sick! [UPI]
Billy Zane's parents closed down the Chicago med school they owned, leaving some students in the lurch. [UPI]
Enya: Might tour for the first time ever. [Reuters]
Oh, good (oh God?): The Vatican's newspaper has finally forgiven John Lennon for declaring that the Beatles were more famous than Jesus Christ. Plus, The paper says the Beatles made music that is better than "standardized, stereotypical" songs being produced today. [Reuters, AP]
Speaking of the Beatles, Paul McCartney says his conflict with John Lennon was over before the singer was shot. [UPI]
investigators say Olivia Newton-John's missing boyfriend probably drowned while on a fishing trip. [News.com.au]
A man who waved Samurai swords at a Hollywood Scientology building had a "previous relationship" to the church; he was shot and killed by a security guard. [AP]
Rocker Bryan Ferry is dating his son's ex-girlfriend. The Roxy Music star is 63; the lady in question is 27 and his son is 22. A "pal" says the lady had fling with the son about 5 years ago. Yuck. [The Sun]
Jodie Sweetin has filed for legal separation from her husband but is "trying to stay positive for Zoie," their 7-month-old daughter. [People]
Why is a letter Princess Diana wrote to her royal footman on her honeymoon up for sale? And how sad is it that she mentions how "terribly lonely" she is? [Daily Mail]
Rod Stewart and Penny Lancaster are trying for a baby. Yeah, he's 63, so what? [Mirror]
"Ever since her Oscar nomination, Sophie Okonedo has been offered plenty of 'mini-skirted girlfriend' parts. But she'd much rather stay home and do nothing." [Telegraph]
Blackadder: a Christmas comeback. [The Star]
A New York rabbi paid $2500 at an auction to go out with ice skating queen Oksana Baiul. He says: "Well, I'm single, it's for charity, and she seems like a nice Jewish girl. I guess I'm the luckiest guy in my congregation." [Page Six]
"My son would have been at that rally in Chicago when the first African- American president was elected, and I'm sure he would have gone up onstage and grabbed the microphone as only he could." — Ol' Dirty Bastard's mom. [Page Six]
"I got drunk and lied to him. I said 'I've lost my keys and I can't wake my mum. Can I stay on your sofa?' He went to brush his teeth. I took my clothes off and jumped in his bed. It's the only way I can ever get together with people." — Lily Allen on her seduction technique. [Mirror]
"I laugh when people say we don't get on. Of course we row. But we are best friends as well as partners. I don't think we'd know what to do without each other." — Kate "Jordan" Price on her relationship with her husband, Peter Andre. [The Sun]
"Axl's a friend, and I don't want to compromise that. But as for 'fun' crazy: He wrote his (half) brother, Stuart, a $25,000 check every day to throw these lavish theme parties. It was like, we're in Indianapolis, so there were Formula One cars everywhere, with all the girls dressed up in pit-crew uniforms. It was decadence at the highest level I'd ever seen, a Caligula kind of outlandishness. There were orgies, sure. Was I involved? Yes. Well, I was in the same room — we'll leave it at that." — Lars Ulrich on being on tour with Axl Rose and Guns N Roses back in the day. [Perez Hilton]
"Something else comes out of you when you become a parent and, as you get older, you start to see more character in your face. Now, when I look at myself, I just see somebody at peace, and I see a mom, and I see my own relatives in my face – and that’s a kind of beauty that exists for everybody and doesn’t disappear." — Angelina Jolie. [Daily Mail]

Daniel Craig Is Injured But Hot

Dodai — Thu, 30 Oct 2008 09:00:00 EDT

Ladies! Get your issue of Entertainment Weekly and hold on to it tightly. Daniel Craig looks mighty fine. [Just Jared]
Daniel Craig showed up at the London premiere of Quantum of Solace with a black sling. He is still injured! (We've seen him in a sling before.) [Guardian]
When Courtenay Semel — whose dad used to run Yahoo, who was once Lindsay Lohan's roommate and Tila Tequila's girlfriend — was arrested in Vegas in August, she allegedly said to the security guard who was trying to prevent her from entering a club: "Do you even know who I am, fucking idiot? Google me, you dumb fuck." Then she hit him in the face. [TMZ]
Lily Allen's PR Machine calls her "the Wordsworth of the MySpace generation." Apparently, her new album, It's Not Me, It's You, contains the following couplet: "Now I lie here in the wet patch in the middle of the bed/I'm feeling pretty damn hard done by, I've spent ages giving head." HAHAHA. [Guardian]

A gun thought to be the murder weapon in the Jennifer Hudson family tragedy has been found. [TMZ]
William Balfour, the main suspect in the Hudson murders, has refused a polygraph test. [Yahoo News]
There was a drug raid at the Hudson house in 2002: Jennifer's brother, Jason, allegedly sold crack to a registered informant. [TMZ]
Nancy Grace spoke with the mother of William Balfour, the man who is being held in the triple murder of Jennifer Hudson's family. His mom says Jennifer Hudson's brother was selling drugs out of the house and her son was with a girlfriend at the time of the crime. [TMZ via CNN]
Melissa Etheridge blogged about being gay and truing to adopt kids over at the Daily Beast. "I know my preference of lifemate freaks some people out," she writes. "Maybe it is just their fear of sex or intimacy. I know that they hold up the Bible and say that it's wrong… I will never forget the day earlier this year when the news came down the wire that the Supreme Court of California had declared same sex marriage legal," Etheridge recalls. "We told our children about it and all danced around the room in family glee." [Yahoo News, via E!]
You guys, this country is going to get less beautiful if Obama doesn't get elected: Seal says he and Heidi Klum will leave the U.S. if McCain wins! Seal told this month's Vanity Fair: "If McCain is elected and America staggers on further towards the abyss, then we will leave the country. That is not a problem for us.” It's a problem for us, dude. [LA Times]
Did you get invited to Heidi Klum's big Halloween bash? Neither did we. Seal, Debra Messing and Christian Siriano will be there. [Page Six]
Yesterday, Matilda Ledger turned three. It was her first birthday without her dad. She celebrated at home with mom MIchelle Williams and a small group of family and friends. [News.com.au]
Angelina Jolie was in Afghanistan last week, meeting with refugees who have returned to their post-Taliban homeland. She says: "After seeing real suffering, you never complain anymore." [People]
Nicole Kidman keeps crying when she thinks of her baby daughter, Sunday Rose. But! "They are tears of joy." Hey, lady: You do have other kids, you know. [The Sun]
David and Victoria Beckham: Superheroes? Stan Lee thinks so! "They're great looking, talented and colorful. Now, here's the exciting part, just imagine how cool they'd be in a humorous, good-natured show that depicts them as, you guessed it—superheroes," he says. Would they have capes? Skin-tight outfits? Would Posh be able to render you immobile with a mere glare? [Yahoo News via E!]
This is hard to imagine, but Victoria Beckham has been training for the New York Marathon in secret. She may not run this weekend if she doesn't feel ready, but she's planning to do the one in L.A. in February. As if wearing all those heels did not punish her feet enough? [Perez Hilton]
Denis Leary is sorry about his autism remarks, you guys. He says: "I apologize for any pain the out-of-context quotes from my book may have caused." [Daily Express]
After Julianne Hough admitted that she had endometriosis, Lacey Schwimmer from Dancing With The Stars has announced that she, too has endometriosis. And that she never would have gotten it checked out if it wasn't for Julianne. [ET]
The Keanu Reeves trial continues! His lawyer caused the paparazzo who filed suit to "buckle under questioning." Sorta wish it was televised. [AP]
Madonna made an "emotional late-night call" to Guy Ritchie and "pleaded" with him to settle their divorce amicably. And by that she means having a mediation with Kabbalah rabbis instead of going to court. [Daily Mail]
Here's a "rocky" interview in which Guy Ritchie discusses RocknRolla and, um, a Kabbalah documentary he's working on. Bet that's off! [News.com.au]
Rosario Dawson wants to clear up the rumors that she is engaged. She's not. "Oh my God, I'd be getting calls from my grandmother being like, 'Mija! How come I had to read this first?'" Grandma's reading trashy gossip! [People]
Jennifer Lopez is an evil genius: She keeps making crappy pilots, which TV networks don't pick up, but she still gets money for them, because they've signed a contract with her. It's twisted. [Jossip]
Peaches Geldof made a wasted spectacle of herself at her husband's band's gig and there's "trouble in paradise." No one saw this coming. No one. [Mirror]
Celine Dion has rescheduled a concert in Minneapolis/St. Paul due to "respiratory illness." Wasn't she just on Oprah? And what do you say to taking chances??? [Star-Tribune]
Is Celine going to try and get knocked up again? [Daily Express]
Natalie Cole says: "I feel sturdy and strong," despite undergoing dialysis three times a ~~day~~ week. AMAZING. [People]
Derek Jeter will not admit that he is dating Minka Kelly, and when asked about A-Rod, replied: "Don't start with me about Kabbalah. I went to Catholic school." Dude, so did Madonna. [People]
Bruce Springsteen is a party pooper! He's not having his elaborate Halloween decorations this year because his cool set-up attracts too many visitors. Boo. No, really. Boo. [AP]
Bill Pullman's 19-year-old son was arrested in North Carolina for alleged underage drinking and possession of moonshine. No word on whether he was driving a car with doors welded shut called the General Lee. [UPI]
Courteney Cox will be in a new ABC half-hour comedy called — uh — Cougar Town. Cox stars as a newly single 40-year-old mom. Lemme guess: She goes on dates, sometimes with younger dudes. [Variety]
This young lady — Andrew Sachs' granddaughter — claims that Russell Brand was a "disappointment" in bed. [The Sun]
After resigning from his radio show for saying he'd "fucked" Andrew Sachs' granddaughter, Russell Brand says "I hope to go to America now and make quite a lot of films." What kind of films, hmm? [The Sun]
Now that the FBI has raided the home of hacker Josh Holly, who hacked Miley Cyrus' e-mail account, Miley is reportedly a "nervous wreck," worrying that more personal pictures and info will be made public, despite the government's involvement. [ONTD]
Zac Efron talked about his hair with Ellen DeGeneres: "I actually modeled it [after] Ellen season 2," he said. "Smart," Ellen replied. "So you're copying me?" Zac confirmed, "I am in fact." [People]
Nicolas Cage is selling his "haunted" New Orleans mansion, if you have $3.8 million. You could live near Brad and Angie! [Daily Express]
Whoa. An apology from The Sun: "On 19 June 2007, we reported that David Hasselhoff had celebrated winning custody of his two daughters by getting drunk and making a nuisance of himself in a Hollywood bar. We now accept that David did not drink any alcohol that evening and nor did he irritate other customers. We apologise to David for any embarrassment caused." [The Sun]
Janet Jackson tamed down part of her concert for Michigan, where state law prohibits simulated sex acts in a public space. Usually, she pulls a male fan from the crowd, ties him down and "molests" him while her dancers mime various sexual acts, including masturbation. *cough* [Yahoo News]
Speaking of Jacksons, here are Michael and his kids. They are wearing masks, maybe because it's Halloween, maybe because it's Wednesday night. Who knows. [The Life Files]
Hey! The Jackson 5 are reuniting! For a tour, which would include Michael and Janet! Let's pretend they're gonna look like this, okay? [NY Times]
Paris Hilton has parted ways with Jason Moore, who has been her manager for more than 10 years. He was the one who walked away. [Daily Express]
Josiah Leming, a homeless singer whose mother is dying of cancer, might be blocked from releasing the album he recorded because he was a contestant last season on American Idol. Shit, when you sign a reality show contract, you generally screw yourself, huh? [Page Six]
Peter Andre is NOT leaving Katie "Jordan" Price, so you can all just relax and get a good night's sleep, okay? [The Sun]
Ice T's wife Coco says of Halloween: "It's my day! I get to get naked! Finally!!!" Ahem. Pardon? Ice T explains: You know, a lot of people comment, but some chicks like to be wild. You come home and they're standing on the couch and they want to jump at you and tackle you. Coco's one of them girls." [NY Mag]
Melissa Auf der Maur has an "elaborate new project" coming out: OOOM (Out of Our Minds), a "3-D concept album" that includes a CD, a half-hour film, a comic book and website. Oh! And she has a persona in the project: MAdM. Expect a "conceptual fantasy world, spawned from sound." [ONTD]
E! has ordered a second season of Denise Richards: It's Complicated. Oh, it's simple: Vom. [AP]
Corey Haim: Getting married. Think Feldman will attend? [ONTD]
Beatles songs on the Rock Band video game? Yeah, yeah, yeah. [WSJ]
The Phil Spector retrial has begun; yesterday the prosector told jurors Spector murdered actress Lana Clarkson in a "petulant fit of rage." [Yahoo News]
Kato Kaelin might be back, on a reality show called 16th Minute. Bascially, it would feature "stars" whose 15 minutes of fame are up — and give them one extra minute. Do you weep for humanity? [mediabistro]
"I hadn't eaten all day, and I was starving. They were coming around with this bowl of brownies, and I grabbed three of them and just started scarfing them down. After that, every lyric sounded like it was the Cookie Monster yelling in my ear, and I started feeling really shitty, but I had to play through the set. I couldn't just go up to Puffy and say, 'Sorry, I ate a shit-load of hash brownies, I can't do your White Party.'" — Mark Ronson, on the refreshments at Diddy's soirée. [Page Six]
"If I get married again, then it will be the last time." — Jessica Simpson. [Page Six]
"My mom's like 'Honey, don't get married.' It comes from a good place, but I'm such a romantic, I'd like to get married one day. It's fulfilling to live with a person you love." — Alexa Ray Joel, whose Mother, Christie Brinkley, went through a nasty divorce with Peter Cook. [Daily Express]
"I spent most of the year I was 27 toxic, just completely over-medicated. I was stoked to make it past 27. Everyone was really worried. My management company were panicked, because I was out of the office, and 'pharmaceutically engaged.'" — Pete Wentz. [Daily Express]
"I got into an argument with him. I don’t believe him as much as he believes him. He said something along the lines of, 'I only shag really stupid women.' And I said, 'I guess they would have to be.' I don’t get him at all." — Pink on John Mayer. [The Sun]
"I can't stand Sarah Palin. I bet a woman like that has no sense of humor." — Grace Jones. [Yahoo News]

Senior Smackdown: Florence Henderson Vs. Cloris Leachman

Dodai — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 09:00:00 EDT

It's Flo versus Clo! Florence Henderson has been watching Cloris Leachman on Dancing With The Stars and says: "I hope the audience doesn’t think all older people act like her. I love Cloris, but sometimes she acts like she’s not all there, or she’s wandering around the ballroom acting silly." Flo also says Leachman “is given a lot of leeway because of her age." Stop drinking haterade, Mrs. Brady. [LA Times]
Additional DWTS gossip: Apparently Maksim Chmerkovskiy thinks Cheryl Burke and Lacey Schwimmer need to slim down: "When I first saw these women this season, I said, 'Guys, you know the camera adds 10 pounds.' You have to do something about this." [LA Times]
Oprah is being sued by a Louisiana man who claims she and an attorney made false statements that led the FBI to arrest him on extortion charges. Wiretapping, defamation, it's a mess. [Yahoo News]
If Obama wins, will Oprah be appointed as the Ambassador to Britain? [Times of London]
Did Gossip Girl's Taylor Momsen get a "life threatening" throat infection because she is too damn thin? [E!]

Are you "uber-organized, hypersensitive" and located in New York? Gossip Girl's Leighton Meester needs a personal assistant. [NY Mag]
Britney's victory in her driving without a license trial "closes a chapter on her past troubles," says her lawyer, who is paid to say such things. [People]
Britney posted a picture of herself and her boys at a pumpkin patch on her website. [ET]
Here's more on Fashion House, Bravo's Project Runway knockoff. [Page Six]
Katherine Heigl on adopting a Korean baby: "It's definitely something we've talked about and want to do." [ET]
Not only have Lindsay Lohan's Ugly Betty episodes been cut from 6 to 4, she is being cut out of some of the episodes they have already shot. [Perez Hilton]
Oh, and Lindsay doesn't have any more roles lined up after Ugly Betty. No movies, no nothin'. [MSNBC]
Check out Beyoncé looking rough, in character for Cadillac Records: [Just Jared]
Jeremy Piven's on the cover of Page Six Magazine. The notorious womanizer is apparently looking to "settle down." [NY Post]
As Raffaello Follieri was hauled off to jail, he made a statement: "I just hope that some day those who have been hurt by my action will one day forgive me." Which loosely translates to: "Sorry, Anne Hathaway. I fucked up. Can I call you when I get out in 4½ years?" [Daily Mail]
Justin Timberlake's not the only one in the relationship who can sing: Jessica Biel grew up doing musicals and has recorded vocals for the Easy Virtue soundtrack. Apparently she has a great voice. [E!]
Amy Winehouse was interviewed by a French TV crew via intercom at her house. She only talked about Blake Incarcerated. [Perez Hilton]
Madonna is undergoing intense Kabbalah "anger management" to deal with her rage against Guy Ritchie. Not sure what that entails. Snapping the red string? [The Sun]
Meanwhile Guy Ritchie looks pretty damn happy these days. [The Sun]
Janet Jackson and Jermaine Dupri made a YouTube video in which she announces that she's feeling better. Then Dupri jokes: "Baby, they say you broke up with me because I threw up on you." [People]
Heather Mills has already spent £10 million of her divorce settlement. It's been seven months. [The Sun]
Gisele Bundchen's naked and covered in vines in ad ad campaign to save the rainforest. Hopefully it's not poison ivy on her crotch. [Mirror]
Whoa: A 3-D live action rock 'n roll musical about Cleopatra, directed by Stephen Soderbergh and starring Catherine Zeta-Jones. Either the worst or the absolute best thing ever. [Variety]
Headline of the day: "SOMEWHERE THERE'S A LANDFILL FULL OF EDDIE MURPHY'S UNDERWEAR." [Janet Charlton's Hollywood]
Is Lily Allen's new song about cocaine? Lyrics: "I’m not trying to say that I’m smelling of roses/but when will we tire of putting shit up our noses." [The Sun]
Bjork! In the news: She's campaigning for a more environmental approach to Iceland's natural resources. [ITN]
Miley Cyrus on that 20-year-old model she's been haning out with, Justin Gaston: "He's been a really great friend more than anything." When asked if they are dating, Miley said: "Maybe. Maybe not." [People]
Uh-oh, Miley got a lecture from her dad. She's supposed to be focusing on her career, not boys. Someone has to be the cash cow in the family! [The Sun]
Ali Lohan has applied for a work permit in L.A. As a minor, she needs papers so she can get her singing career going. Apparently she's already been recording in, um, a hotel-casino in Vegas. [TMZ]
Paris Hilton and Jordan met in London. The Four Horsemen were seen on the horizon. [The Sun]
Macaulay Culkin: Coming to TV. Upcoming NBC drama Kings will also star Ian McShane. [EW]
Bianca Jagger's been evicted from her rent-stabilized Manhattan apartment. Someting about being on a tourist visa and claiming it as a "primary residence." A Park Avenue space for $4,614 a month doesn't really sound like a deal. [AP]
If you were hoping for a wax figure of Zac Efron you're in luck. He's at Madam Tussauds in Las Vegas. [UPI]
The Bonnie Hunt Show: doomed. [Jossip]
Check out this Happy Days inspired Obama ad. [BoingBoing]
Chelsea Handler's show, Chelsea Lately, is being renewed through 2009. [MediaWeek]
Caroline Rhea gave birth to a baby girl on Monday: Ava Rhea Economopoulos. "We wanted the shortest first name possible, since her last name is the alphabet," says the new mom. [People]
Been caught stealing? Jane's Addiction will perform for the second time this year. Reunion in the works? [Reuters]
Isaac Hayes left nothing to Scientology in his will. [Fox 411]
Please please please let me get what I want: A Morrissey memoir! [NY Times]
Speaking of which: A Smiths reunion? [The Sun]
During a concert, Jay-Z dedicated "99 Problems" to McCain and a "homegirl," described as "the one who says 'You betcha.'" [ABC News]
Heidi Klum wearing Rami Kashou! [Blogging Project Runway]
Little Britain's Matt Lucas divorced his husband; now they're in a custody battle over the dog. [The Sun]
A man sued along with Jay Leno over a car dealer has killed himself. [TMZ]
Debra Messing likes being a redhead because she never got any work as a brunette. [Daily Express]
"This (rumor) has been floating around for a while. I've seen different notions of it. I doubt it'll be me and Brad. I know Brad can't sing. Reznor would be about the right vibe for it, I guess." — Ed Norton, on the rumor that there's gonna be a Fight Club musical with music by Nine Inch Nails star Trent Reznor. [Daily Express]
"I was being objectified, but actually that’s not a bad thing to feel. I knew exactly what was going on when I did that shot. There’s a conscious decision to everything I do. For me to say, 'Oh, God! I didn’t realize that would happen!' sounds incredibly naïve. I look at that picture, and my only thought now is that I certainly don’t look like that anymore. For Quantum of Solace, I made a decision that I wanted to get bigger and get muscles, because Bond is older and has probably been training." — Daniel Craig, on the infamous swimsuit shot from his first Bond film. [Just Jared]
"Obama would be the better Bond because — if he’s true to his word — he’d be willing to quite literally look the enemy in the eye and go toe-to-toe with them. McCain, because of his long service and experience, would probably be a better M (James Bond’s boss). There is, come to think of it, a kind of Judi Dench quality to McCain." — Daniel Craig, in Parade magazine. [MSNBC]
The kids are my priority, so it's possible that from now on I will make fewer movies. I may even stop altogether. I no longer have the ambition I had in my 20s." — Angelina Jolie. [People]
"Usually people fall in love and everything revolves around the ritual of marriage. Children are an afterthought. We did everything backwards. But sooner or later, it will be the kids who ask us. They see films and start asking questions. Such as, 'Why are Shrek and Fiona married and you're not?'" — Angelina Jolie. [Rush & Molloy]
"He's got to be that guy that we all just secretly want to live his life. Even if it's just for a week I mean wouldn't that be incredible? If you had to pick one person he would be the guy for me, I would want to be him for a week." — Charlize Theron on Richard Branson. [The Star]
"Hearst Corporation, which my family owns, continues to host parties even as it folds magazines like CosmoGirl. It seems excessive… At least Hearst recently cancelled the company Christmas bash. It's time to work through this crisis, not party through it." — model and heiress Lydia Hearst. [Page Six]
"I am constantly surprised by this huge country. It’s like a never-ending novel with each page more exciting and bizarre than the last. Don’t get me wrong, I have always loved London, it’s a city where being unusual is accepted. I grew up there, walked its cobbled streets and frequented its infamous haunts. The skies are always grey and the weather is freezing but the place is alive and vibrant with culture. The decision to leave my homeland was difficult but I’m happy I made it. New York is where I finally feel at home. Driving over the Brooklyn Bridge at night in a yellow cab and gazing out over the tops of the skyscrapers, there’s no place I’d rather be." — Noted poet, Peaches Geldof. [Daily Express]
"I knew the Geldof girls from years ago through their dad Bob, so I've seen them grow up. I think Peaches is just working out her way in the world. If she's happy being married then that's great. It's good to be crazy and make mistakes when you're growing up. Then when you're 80 you can look back and laugh." —Geri Halliwell. [Mirror]

Loose Lips

Jessica — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 17:30:00 EDT

Janet Jackson is out of the hospital after a whopping two hour stay after she had "fallen ill" during a pre-concert sound check last night. No word yet on what this brief mystery affliction might be. • Gossip Girl star Chace Crawford on his cross to bear: "Model turned actor, dime a dozen, eye candy, doesn't know what he's doing ... and Perez Hilton says I have 'gayface'…So on top of everything else, I have to overcome gayface." • If you want to hear Paris Hilton's new song, "My BFF" click here. It sounds like a rejected Debbie Gibson B-side. [TMZ, Us, Dlisted, Ryan Seacrest]

Travis Barker Leaves Hospital; Brad & Angie Might Adopt (Again)

Dodai — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 09:00:00 EDT

After nine days in a burn center, Travis Barker has been released from the hospital and is heading back to L.A. By bus. A friend says: "He will never fly again – ever." [People]
Shanna Moakler is sticking by her ex-husband, because they still love each other. Also: "He's not in good shape," a source says. "It's very serious." He's headed to a hospital in the L.A. area. [People]
Here's a picture of DJ AM, who left his home yesterday to attend a memorial service for Travis Barker's assistant. AM has clearly visible burns, but seems to be able to walk. [TMZ, People]
Actress Joely Fisher and husband Chris Duddy have adopted a baby girl from South Central Los Angeles. The infant is an African-American girl they've named Olivia. A family friend says: "Joely and Chris were inspired by Angelina and Madonna's decisions to adopt a baby from Africa. But after looking into the adoption process, they realized there were so many children in the L.A. area who needed homes." Word. [Star]
What's this? Brad and Angelina looking to adopt a kid from a Latin American country? Two months after having twins? Ay dios mio. [Daily Mail]

Christina Applegate talked to Oprah about her double mastectomy. She says she didn't cry at first. "And then when I met with my doctor and I told him that was my decision and he brought the surgeon in and it was like the flood gates just opened up and I – I lost it." [People]
Janet Jackson canceled her concert in Montreal on Monday after she "got suddenly ill." She was rushed to the hospital. Think it was a hangover from Jermaine Dupri's birthday party? As you'll recall, he vomited on her lap. [Yahoo News]
Robert Redford on his late friend and co-star, Paul Newman: "This was a man who lived a life that really meant something and will for some time to come." ABC News]
Here's a collection of quips by Paul Newman. [Chicago Sun-Times]
Miley Cyrus decided to take over Disneyland for her 16th birthday bash, but the date she wants happens to be the Gay Day celebration at the theme park. So: Miley in, gays out. [Perez Hilton]
Britney may have won an MTV award for her "Piece Of Me" video, but she doesn't even think it's that great. "It's a cool video, but I think by far I've done videos that are way better," she says. "So I was really shocked that ... it got the award." As were we, dear. As were we. [AP]
Despite what you might have heard, there is no Britney sex tape. Says a source close to Britney. [E!]
Britney's in New York, btw. [The.Life Files]
Plug your ears: Jessica Simpson is going to sing on Dancing With The Stars. [UPI]
Naomi Watts turned 40 on Sunday, and she got a big present from her man, Liev Schreiber: A Mercedes-Benz Bluetec, the new, environmentally friendly luxury SUV. [E!]
Two people involved in an accident that injured Shia LaBeouf were charged Monday with giving police false information about the wreck. There was a young couple in the other car; apparently the woman said she was driving, but the man was behind the wheel. [Yahoo News]
Lauren Conrad: Seen making out with My Boys actor Kyle Howard. [E!]
LC and Audrina are not "Top Friends" on MySpace. But trying to make news out of someone's MySpace mood is dumb. [Perez Hilton]
All My Sons was the highest-grossing (non-musical) play on Broadway last week. Is Katie Holmes to thank? [AP]
Ashlee Simpson sleeps with so many teddy bears there's hardly room for Pete Wentz in the bed. [Perez Hilton]
Eva Longoria continues to wear flowy tops and drink water instead of cocktails; gossipers continue to speculate that she is pregnant. [E!]
Three words: Katy Perry doll. [NY Mag]
Madonna's concert at Wembley stadium ran over the time allotted, so she has to pay a £135,000 fine. Pocket change for Her Madgesty! [Guardian]
David Beckham will be a character in a series of books that will bring children to reading through, um, soccer. [The Sun, Telegraph]
The "poor" chick on Gossip Girl hangs with high society in real life. [Page Six]
Renee Zellweger and Harry Connick Jr bring an uplifting movie about a breast-cancer drug to Lifetime. [Village Voice]
Does Sophia Bush read Jezebel? In Health magazine she says: "It's weird: In our business, I'm a size 2 and considered curvy. It's important to remind young women, 'Listen, even skinny girls have cellulite, even Halle Berry has cellulite, and what you see in photos isn't totally real.'" [People]
Keira Knightley does not drink, do drugs or smoke (really?) but she does curse up a storm. "I've a foul mouth like my mum," she says. [Mirror]
Shocker: Black people like singer Robin Thicke even though he is white. [Newser]
Traci Bingham is bringing a new show to Fox. "It's like America's Next Top Model," she says, "only they'll act, and perform and be athletic, as well." The difference is that Traci won't make fun of the contestants like Tyra does: "Don't you hate that?" [E!]
Elisabeth Hasselbeck is "really upset" about the election conversations on The View, and Barbara Walters has had to call a powwow with Hasselbeck, Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar. Can Babs make the ladies work it out? [Perez Hilton]
Flea of the Red Hot Chili Peppers just enrolled as a freshman a the University of Southern California. He'll be studying music, of course. He should have gone to a Catholic school, since Catholic schoolgirls rule. [Perez Hilton]
Demi Moore is suing a magazine that printed pictures of her and other celebrities at an Oscars party she hosted. [News.com.au]
Country singer Mindy McCready will surrender to Tennessee authorities on today to start a 60-day jail sentence for violating probation on a previous drug-related charge. [Yahoo News]
Kevin Costner will release his first album with his country-rock band, not that you give a shit. [People]
More bad news for Ed McMahon: He's being sued by Merv Griffin's company. [USA Today]
Ellen Burstyn has joined the cast of Showtime's Possible Side Effects, a drama set inside the world of the pharmaceutical industry. Tim Robbins is writing and directing. Diagnosis: Good! [Variety]
Sadie Frost has swapped fashion for filmmaking. Her short film is about an evil nanny who terrorizes a single mother and daughter. [Mirror]
"I've just written my first screenplay. It is pretty incredible to finish it — the first draft. I got somebody to teach me — there’s a programme called Final Draft. I had someone come round my house and teach me how to use it." — Geri Halliwell. [The Sun]
"Listen, I’m a reasonable human being. If people pay me enough, I’ll stop playing my music." — James Blunt. [The Sun]
"I convinced myself I was pregnant when I was 13 and I hadn’t even got my period. There are so many rumours and also so much wrong information being passed around, so it is a really important message the World Contraception Day is trying to give out. I am not the kind of person who talks about my sex life, but I am not afraid to talk about contraception. I go three, maybe four times a year to get tested for sexually transmitted infections and most of the time I don’t even need to. I just go for peace of mind." — Kelly Osbourne. [The Sun]
"I’ve written some really, really deeply sexual things on some of the cards I’ve given him for opening night. But just to wind him up, you know. He’s great. He’s a truly remarkable man. You know, if I was gay or a female I’d, well, just want to marry him." — Daniel Radcliffe on his Equus co-star, Lorenzo Pisoni. [Daily Star]

Janet & Jermaine Exhibit Animal Magnetism

Anna — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 12:50:00 EDT

[New York, September 23. Image via INF]

Samantha Ronson: No Gigs At Gay Bars?

Dodai — Tue, 23 Sep 2008 09:00:00 EDT

Did Samantha Ronson refuse to DJ a lesbian bar because "she doesn't do those kind of venues" ? [Page Six]
Headline of the day: "Lindsay's MySpace Is Like Her Fake Wedding Ring." [E!]
Additionally, Lindsay says Joe Francis is "yuck." [E!]
Did Michael Lohan write a blog in which he calls Samantha Ronson "disgusting" and discusses her toilet paper habits? [The Sun]
Victoria Beckham says she'd like to have another kid but she's too busy right now. "I don’t want another baby for two years because I’m working so hard on my fashion business. I haven’t got time. We would like another child but it won’t be for a couple of years yet." She also says: "David and I still go out on our own and we have a real laugh together. I love him more now than I did when we first met." Awww. Sniff! [The Sun]
The Jolie-Pitt Foundation has just donated another $1 million, this time to fund the Human Rights Watch's work in Burma and Zimbabwe. [Perez Hilton]

It's official! Whitney Port, the girl who was flown to Paris by Condé Nast but could not pronounce Givenchy, has her own spinoff of The Hills. The series starts shooting immediately in New York and will follow Whitney's life working for Diane von Furstenberg. Can Whit hold her own? Can she pronounce Houston Street? All will be revealed in 2009. [E!]
Shanna Moakler, who was "devastated" when she learned of the plane crash that left her ex-husband badly burned, is spending time with Travis Barker, trying to lift his spirits. [People]
Will George Clooney come back for the final season of ER? (Hint: No.) [Reuters]
MTV is working on a "black version" of The Muppets with, who else, Kanye West. [Rush & Molloy]
Blake Incarcerated says he'd rather stay in jail than go to rehab, probably because you can get drugs in jail. [The Sun]
Kate Moss has been "trying to forget" her breakup with Jamie Hince by hanging out in Paris. [The Sun]
A judge has thrown out a paparazzo's suit against Keanu Reeves; Keanu hit the dude with his car as he was trying to inch out of a parking space and the guy tripped over his own feet and hurt his wrist. [AP]
Is Kristin Chenoweth dating Jeff Probst? They're both very pretty. (She says "We're really good friends.") [E!]
Jonny Lee Miller, ex-husband of Angelina Jolie and star of TV show Eli Stone, is expecting a child with wife Michele Hicks. It will be their first! [People]
Vanessa Minnillo and Nick Lachey may have split up, not that you care. Also maybe on the rocks: Josh Duhamel and Fergie. [E!]
Radar did a photo shoot with Shannen Doherty and she looks all angst-y. [Radar]
Isaac Hayes has left part of his estate to the Isaac Hayes Foundation, which promotes literacy, music and nutrition. [AP]
Hugh Hefner says Holly Madison is not dating Criss Angel. "Holly shares my bed on a nightly basis," Hef says. But! He admits that his relationships with Holly, Kendra and Bridget are "in transition." [E!]
Michael Phelps admits he pees in the pool. And! If you missed Phelps playing Dr. McSwimmy in a Grey's Anatomy spoof before the Emmys, you can see it here. [LA Times]
Pete Doherty was a "chess-mad schoolboy" when he was a kid. [The Sun]
Charlie Sheen's wife had emergency gall bladder surgery even though she's in the early stages of pregnancy, yikes. She's gonna be okay. [E!]
Jennifer Hudson's new CD includes a duet with fellow American Idol alum Fantasia. That's a lot of voice on one track. [Fox 411]
Janet Jackson has left her record label. Stay tuned as she tries to figure out how to stay relevant. [E!]
"I would like to go to university and complete a degree and so that will mean a break from acting. I've always tried to balance my education with my acting career, but I just don't think it will be possible to juggle it with a degree course. I have a need now to study." — Emma "Hermione Granger" Watson. [Daily Mail]
"I am a size 27 jeans. My measurements are 34, 26, 39. But remember I am 5'2" and ½ and everyone carries their weight in different places. I am really sick and tired of people being so mean and nasty and assume I am lying. JUST FOR YOU NON-BELIEVERS, I WILL POST A VIDEO BLOG OF ME SHOWING YOU GUYS MY SIZE 27 JEANS LATER TONIGHT!" — Kim Kardashian. [MSNBC]

Simon Doonan & Jonathan Adler: Newlyweds!

Dodai — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 09:00:00 EDT

Barneys Creative Director Simon Doonan and designer Jonathan Adler were wed yesterday at City Hall in San Francisco! This article states that they "sealed the union with a spirited sprint down the glorious grand staircase." Mr. Doonan wore a Liberty print shirt, Barneys Co-op jeans, a Prada V-neck and a Thom Browne velvet jacket. Mr. Adler wore Barneys Co-op jeans, V-neck, a Fred Perry sweater, and Adidas sneakers. [SFGate, Photo by Thor Swift]
If Prop. 8 passes in California, "it would be the first time in American history that an existing minority right would be taken away by the vote of a majority." The Christian conservatives are ahead, in terms of fundraising. Karen Ocamb's article indicates that Ellen DeGeneres, Rosie O’Donnell, Sir Elton John and Melissa Etheridge have not donated to the cause to fight Prop 8, according to the California Secretary of State’s Campaign Finance website. Ocamb writes: "While their visibility as openly LGBT celebrities and entertainment power players is important, their financial absence from the specific fight to save the fundamental right of same-sex couples to marry is hurting." [In L.A. Magazine]
Katie Holmes made her Broadway debut in All My Sons last night and Tom Cruise loved it. "It was extraordinary," he says. [Yahoo News]

Heidi Klum is freaking out about hosting the Emmys on Sunday. She says: "I get nervous when so many people are looking at me. It’s live and you go on stage and no one asks questions. To go out and just talk is terrifying." Heidi, when it doubt, say "deezigners." Everyone loves that! [The Sun]
BREAKING: Ivana Trump flew coach. [Page Six]
Pink's song about heartbreak, "So What," is her first No.1 song on Billboard's Hot 100. She says the track is not entirely autobiographical, but the opening line is, "I guess I just lost my husband." (Watch the video!) [Yahoo News]
Nicole Kidman speaks about her baby and her hubby! She says: "To be given the blessing of a child at this stage of my life was wonderful." She also claims she and Keith can't stand to be away from each other. "We start to hurt after seven days. I've never wanted to live my life apart from the person I love. If you're going to be with someone, you're with them, you’re committed to them. I'm not sort of flitting around. If I fall, I fall — that's it. We gently fell into each other. We were two lonely people who went, 'Ah, there you are.'" [The Sun]
After shooting 30 Rock with Oprah, Tina Fey says: "I would like to announce that we are officially best friends." [Chicago Tribune]
You know how Amy Poehler is getting her own show? Will Arnett will be on it! Her husband! [Onion AV Club]
Justin Timberlake is planning on writing a song for his friend Ellen DeGeneres and her new bride Portia de Rossi. "I actually made them a promise and I'm gonna stick to it," he says. Let you whip me if I misbehave… [UPI]
Simon Cowell uses so much Botox he can no longer scowl. He says: "To me, Botox is no more unusual than toothpaste. It simply works. You do it once a year — who cares?" Um, Simon, do you only brush your teeth only once a year?? [The Sun]
George Clooney's character in Burn After Reading uses a sex ramp; apparently sales of this item are suddenly up. [Daily Express]
Katherine Heigl earns about 22 times what her Grey's Anatomy costar Ellen Pompeo makes, thanks to her film career. (Other Grey's salaries are compared here, too.) [Portƒolio]
Val Kilmer as the governor of New Mexico? Bill Richardson says yes! "I like the idea. Val Kilmer is a New Mexican; he was Batman. You know there have been successful actors going into politics." [Shakesville]
Last night, Audrina Patridge maybe moved out of the house that she shared with Lauren Conrad and Lo Bosworth. Plus: Rumors are swirling that she's getting her own spin-off show. Please let JustinBobby be in it! [TMZ]
Oooh the Jack White/Alicia Keys Bond theme! It's called "Another Way To Die." Listen here. [Concrete Loop]
So you know how Robert Downey Jr. is going to play Sherlock Holmes in a flick directed by Guy Ritchie? Jude Law will play Watson. [Ain't It Cool]
Gwyneth Paltrow and Mario Batali will do another 13 episodes of their cooking show; this time in Italy. [Perez Hilton]
Contrary to reports, two of Paris Hilton's dogs were NOT eaten by a coyote. [Page Six, People]
Pat O'Brien is leaving The Insider. [People]
Ryan O'Neal's lawyer says: "Those were not Ryan's drugs, he doesn't use drugs." [People]
Gary Coleman's lawyer says "he did nothing wrong." This comes after Coleman allegedly ran over a dude who tried to take his picture with a camera phone. [People]
Janet Jackson's Rock Witchu tour: "Overloaded with blinding dazzle, pyrotechnics and gaudy style over substance. The myriad production numbers were reminiscent of a poor Vegas revue and emotionally distant, the band and backup singers bolstering her vocals hidden away, leaving one to wonder if some — or most — of it was prerecorded." [Reuters]
Is Britney Spears getting special treatment for her driving without a valid license trial? [AP]
Broke oil "heir" Brandon Davis owes money all over town. [Page Six]
Is Kathy Griffin moving her Life On The D-List show from Bravo to some other network? [Page Six]
Denise Richards' show: Getting canceled? [Page Six]
Joan Prather of Eight Is Enough was arrested after dragging an L.A. County Sheriff's deputy down the Pacific Coast Highway with her car. [TMZ]
China's Ugly Betty is not ugly enough. [Guardian]
Speaking of Ugly Betty, America Ferrera says Henry and Gio will be back on Season 3. [EW]
Alex and Cynthia Rodriguez: Officially divorced. That was quick! [TMZ]
LL Cool J is pissed because Jessica Simpson's album beat his on the charts. [MSNBC]
Ronnie Wood's estranged wife says: "I'm enjoying my new freedom." [The Sun]
Ashton Kutcher doesn't know how to spell step-daughter Tallulah's name. [Perez Hilton]
Does Playboy treat black women like crap? [TMZ]
The Spice Girls have beaten Led Zeppelin for an award for the best music reunion. Girl powah! [BBC News]
Tracy Chapman is releasing her first new album in years, and you can listen to a track here. [Perez Hilton]
"I do believe in marriage… But I just think for me, it’s not a desperate kind of thing. In America it’s definitely something that seems to be a major goal with every woman – the big wedding day. I don’t need that. I want total commitment and spiritual connection, and I am lucky because that’s what I’ve got. One of the things that first attracted me to my boyfriend is his brain. He’s very well-read and really sexy to me. Brains are the most important thing to me, because I feel I lack them. I want them from the man I am with. I love a well-read man – that is such a turn-on." — Eva Mendes. [Mirror]

The Betsey Johnson-Anna Nicole Makeout Session Is A Bad Mental Image

Sadie — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 11:30:00 EDT

We love Betsey Johnson, but we're kind of weirded out by the revelation that she made out with Anna Nicole Smith, like on a Monday in 10th Grade when you hear about some really random hookup from a party over the weekend. "She was wearing one of those dotted net see-through things with roses on her bullet bra underneath . . . It was when she was doing TrimSpa, and she looked really beautiful." Okay, but wouldn't that be around the same time she was doing eating contests on her reality show? Again: to each her own. [Page Six]
Janet Jackson's apparently unironic lingerie line, Pleasure Principle, is out. "The legendary hip-hop and R&B diva teamed with Bruno Schiavi, the Australian lingerie designer behind Dr. Rey’s Shapewear line (named for “Dr. 90210” fixture Dr. Robert Rey), for her debut fashion duet. The 18-piece line is named after the hit single from Jackson’s 1986 multiplatinum album “Control,” is designed to be comfortable for a range of sizes — 32A to 44G, and is crafted of mostly satin and lace." [WWD]
It seems like celebs are always lying about how they're going to wear Project Runway designs, but after guest-judging the Australian iteration, Kelly Rowland's actually making good. "Wearing the custom-made, scalloped outfit on stage at a concert in Cannes, France, a few nights ago, the diva strutted her stuff - which almost brought a tear to the Brisbane designer's eye."She was so lovely and the fact that she has worn my design makes me so proud," Juli Grbac gushed. NB: from the pic, we can kinda see why they usually back out. [News.com.au]

I think we've already expressed that the descriptions of Madonna's upcoming "Sticky & Sweet" tour are seriously depressing us. This doesn't help. "The Sticky & Sweet tour, which opens in Cardiff on Saturday, features an intriguing mix of gangsta pimp, dominatrix and gipsy costumes. And with looks designed by Givenchy's Ricardo Tisci, shoes by Miu Miu, thigh-high boots custom-made by Stella McCartney and sundry items from Yves Saint Laurent and Roberto Cavalli, it leaves no fashion stone unturned." [Telegraph]
Kids aren't the only ones spending less on back-to-school; apparently teachers are some of the "hardest hit" by the recession. "Teachers from across the country are reporting they are spending less on clothes, waiting for sales and sometimes changing where they shop — even after some taking summer jobs to offset the increasing cost of living, according to an informal survey by WWD." [WWD]
Nina Garcia "reveals" her list of top-ten "essentials." Spoiler: a little black dress is one of them. [Dallas News]
Olympic committee rules make uniform expression a challenge: "Because country names on the front must be written in the Latin alphabet, countries like China compensate by using Chinese characters on the back. Flags and sponsor logos must be in a certain place and a certain size. The colors are regulated." [NYT]
Speaking of rules, official sponsor Nike has been forced to let Speedo make the games' swim suits; seems the banana hammocks are just more efficient. "The apparent benefit of the LZR, which has a novel hydrodynamic construction that compresses the body into a tube, reducing drag while at the same time improving muscle performance, became apparent in national Olympic trials." [Times of Times]
Teeny tiny Broadway star Kristin Chenoweth loves her some Armani: '"They really came though for me, and I'm a die-hard fan," she gushes. "After [the Oscars] were over, he sent me six dozen long-stemmed white roses with a really beautiful letter that said, 'Thank you so much' and 'I wanna dress you all the time.' " [Yahoo]
Following Moe's profile of the editrix feuding at Elle, New York defends the story's integrity: "Maureen's story drew on many reliable sources — some on the record, and some on background. We stand by its accuracy." [WWD]
Wait, so they don't just wear them to look hot? Holly McPeak explains that bikinis are more comfortable for beach volleyball: "You don't have an issue of sweat and sand collecting in places that you don't want it to," she says. "It really is the most functional uniform for beach volleyball." Thank you, we'd assumed that. [NPR]
Heidi Klum's new ads for her Jordache collection - ripping off Heidi Montag? We're gonna go with, no. [Yahoo]
Although the study is not conclusive, seems the rich are indeed different - or at least richer. Sales aren't flagging at all on Rodeo Drive. [LAT]
Speaking of the rich — or at any rate, the titled — peers in the House of Lords have called for a moratorium on the waste culture that is fast fashion. No commentary required. [Daily Mail]
Does Steve Carrell's wardrobe make the movie? Um, not really. [Guardian]
Hayden Panettiere's mother apparently prepared to hawk her daughter's undies for charity. She didn't, though. [The Sun]
Sweater company Lutz + Patmos, who in the past have done lines with random celebrities like Kirsten Dunst and Liv Tyler, is collaborating with Jane Birkin, who — if equally unqualified — is, at least, unassailably cool. [Nylon]