[Los Angeles, November 19. Image via WENN.]

• Madonna is in Brazil, but not to meet Jesus' parents. She says:

"I am going there strictly for fund raising and humanitarian purposes." Her Madgesty is sponsoring a documentary about kids living in the squalid hillside slums. [Page Six]

• Guess who was seeing Heath Ledger when he died? Lindsay Lohan. Her mom, Dina, tells Michael Lohan about it in this — you guessed it — recorded phone conversation. In the audio, Dina says Lindsay "cannot be alone" and sleeps with Dina when she is home because she has fears of being alone. [Radar Online]
• In a newly released 2008 taped phone call between Lindsay Lohan's assistant, Jenni Muro, and Michael Lohan, the former says: "I am trying to save your daughter's life every day." Muro was also pissed she had to relocate to NYC so LL could be on Ugly Betty, saying: "I get a 5% commission on this entire TV show and it's sick and disgusting and I'm here and I give up my boyfriend and my dog and my parents and my new place in LA and everything so that your daughter doesn't kill herself, ok?" [ONTD via Radar]
• A recent Tweet from Lindsay Lohan: "i'm a regular person to.. i sleep, eat, laugh, cry, shower, have blood running through my veins, i have a heart, etc etc- lol" [Twitter]
• People: I have seen a clip of Lady Gaga's new video, "Bad Romance," and there is latex and implied violence and dancing! The full video debuts Monday, and Ms. Gaga says: "There's this one shot in the video where I get kidnapped by supermodels. I'm washing away my sins and they shove vodka down my throat to drug me up before they sell me off to the Russian mafia." In addition, Gaga wears razor-blade sunglasses: "I wanted to design a pair for some of the toughest chicks and some of my girlfriends - don't do this at home! - they used to keep razor blades in the side of their mouths. That tough female spirit is something that I want to project. It's meant to be, 'This is my shield, this is my weapon, this is my inner sense of fame, this is my monster.'" [MTV News]
• Amy Winehouse loves her new boobs and now wants butt implants to get that "pin-up look." [The Sun]
• Joe Halderman — the CBS news producer accused of trying to extort cash from David Letterman — goes to court today for the first hearing in his criminal case. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Joe Halderman's friends are helping him pay his legal bills. [TMZ]
• Justin Timberlake has been dealing with a stalker, and submitted a statement to a judge yesterday which read: "I fear for my personal safety." He called the behavior of woman in question "ever-increasing, aggressive and harassing." [TMZ]
• At the link, James Franco talks about his upcoming stints on 30 Rock and General Hospital. Of doing a soap opera, he says: "It's been a blast so far. It was kind of mind-blowing. I've worked one day on it. It's one day of a few. But I think we packed seven episodes of my material in." He also reveals that he has not worn an eyepatch. Yet. [NY Magazine]
• Oh dear: Tracy Morgan's stand-up show at Carnegie Hall was so crazy, people walked out. And not crazy in the good way — he called homosexuality a choice and joked, "Obama is really changing the White House, because he and Michelle will have the first presidential sex tape out." [Gatecrasher]
• "Dr. Conrad Murray was on the phone with his girlfriend as Michael Jackson was dying." [TMZ]
• Joe Jackson is being meddlesome with the executors of Michael Jackson's will. [CNN]
• Naomi Campbell is going on a month-long, £1 million vacation with boyfriend Vladislav Doronin, and she is calling it a honeymoon, though they're not married. Grain of salt on this one. [The Sun]
• Levi Johnston has Tweeted: "BREAKING NEWS !!!! SNL APPEARANCE THIS SAT… you hear it first !!!" My guess is that he'll be in the news segment, but you never know — we could get a Tina Fey/Sarah Palin appearance! [MSNBC Scoop]
• Levi Johnston is reportedly going to file for joint custody of his son Tripp. [Page Six]
• Ugh. Carrie Prejean's autobiography is out so she is still in the damn spotlight. She claims the Miss California USA pageant director pressured her into getting a boob job. [Radar Online]
• By the by, Carrie Prejean says her "solo sex tape" was the biggest mistake of her life. [TMZ]
• Director Lee Daniels is not pushing for an Oscar for Precious: "It scares me," he says. When he first heard Oscar talk, "I was completely thrown off guard. I was like … Oscar who? Oscar de la Renta?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Actress Emma Thompson's art project takes viewers on 'Journey' of sex slave" [NY Daily News]
• John Travolta has to promote his new flick Old Dogs, even though he is struggling to get by since the death of his son. He says: "
  "We've been working very hard every day as a family to heal. We have our own way of doing it, and it has been helping." [USA Today]
• Congrats to Halle Berry, who will receive the Sherry Lansing Leadership Award at The Hollywood Reporter's 18th annual Women in Entertainment breakfast presented by Lifetime. Past recipients include Barbara Walters, Meryl Streep, Jodie Foster and Glenn Close. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Entourage's Kevin Connolly gambles and hangs with Playmates. [Page Six]
• Donald Trump and Omarosa will be reunited for Omarosa's new dating reality show on TV One, called Omarosa's Ultimate Merger, on which she tries to choose a love interest from a selection of 12 bachelors. [Variety]
• Boo: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar has been diagnosed with chronic myeloid leukemia. [People]
• "The only thing worse than Aerosmith with Steven Tyler is Aerosmith without Steven Tyler." [NY Post]
• Hot hottie Jason Lewis — you know, he played hottie Smith Jerrod — has been cast as the lead in a new show called Rio! He'll play an international detective (?!?!) who goes to Brazil to investigate a crime… and decides to stay after enjoying the city, its beaches and nightlife. It's Miami Vice and Magnum PI and maybe even Hawaii 5-0. Also, he's hot. [Page Six]
• Someone spilled a drink on Russell Simmons at a party. [Page Six]
• Twilight's Christian Serratos is getting naked for a PETA ad. She's 19. [Gatecrasher]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Kelly Kapowski is pregnant. [Gatecrasher]
• Whatshisname sued a tabloid magazine and won libel damages. [BBC News]
• "When you hear the phrase 'only in America,' it means something extraordinary, something extreme, something good. But if someone were to say ‘only in Britain,' it would be something damp, miserable, no, not until Wednesday and then it's unlikely." — Stephen Fry is promoting Stephen Fry In America and might come live in the U.S. [Daily Express]
• "If he wanted to go down that road he probably would have done so by now. And I think he is a very solid and faithful person." — Mel Gibson's girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva, who has dated Mel and given birth while he's still legally married to his wife of 29 years. [MSNBC]
• "There wasn't going to be any more Juliet, and now there is going to be more Juliet. That's all I can say. I wish I could say more. I don't really like to be so close-lipped, but it kind of just goes with the show." — Lost's Elizabeth Mitchell. [USA Today]
• "How do I still look good? I owe 30 per cent to genes, 30 per cent to good sex, 30 per cent because of sports and healthy lifestyle with proper nutrition and for the remaining 10 per cent – I have to thank my plastic surgeon. I'm 71 and physically don't feel so good since I'm in pain. But I'm happier, the sex is better and I understand life better. I don't want to be young again." — Jane Fonda just had spine surgery, a new knee and hip made of titanium, but she had to get herself repaired because she wants to climb the Himalayas. [Telegraph]
• "I smoke weed, but I don't think it's really a drug. 'It's more of a herb. I don't regret saying that at all. I think everyone smokes weed and people who say they don't are lying! Weed has been given this evil stamp, but how is it dangerous? It's going to make you laugh your arse off? You might go to sleep? I think alcohol is much more harmful. People beat the f**k out of each other on alcohol." — Joss Stone should change her name to Joss Stoned. [Daily Mail]
• "I really enjoy acting. I like being in front of the camera. I think I should be an action star." — Serena Williams, that makes two of us. [NY Daily News]
• "Elevators scare me — just being stuck without phone service when you're alone. Small spaces are fine, if I'm with someone in an elevator fine, but I will not buy an apartment on the 14th floor of a building that's for sure, I've gotta be able to walk. … The unknown is very scary. …I'm scared of a lot of women, certain women because I guess I don't have a lot of confidence in myself, I don't know what it is." — Amanda Seyfried. [Mirror]
• "We're discovering who the enemy are, and I do think we do have an enemy. It means that everyone's got to go on fighting. And in what way you fight, well, it depends who you are… You can write a letter, you can talk about it to your congressperson… you can talk to people in bars… Or you can go on marches, or you can go and break windows." — Sir Ian McKellan on the fight for gay marriage. [Page Six]

Gabourey "Gabby" Sidibe's plum-colored gown has questionable sleeves, but she looks happy and comfortable.

IMdB tells me that Chyna Layne was in Cadillac Records and something called STD: Sexually Transmitted Demons. Her one-sleeved gown is not for wallflowers! It kind of looks like wallpaper, but I love the color, and the large bow on one side reminds me of the Baroness in The Sound Of Music.

Sherri Shepherd looks fantastic, though I think she'd benefit from a more open neckline.

71-year-old Jane Fonda appears to be wearing LEATHER PANTS. And looking fierce while doing so.

Harvey Keitel's glasses = Awesome.

Precious actress Xosha Roquemore looks adorable in this little strapless number.

Paula Patton is stunning, and I dig her interesting LGD — little gray dress — but the booties just aren't right.

Mariah Carey shows off her hourglass figure in what seems to be a long-sleeved American Apparel tee.

Mariah's husband Nick Cannon: Dapper.

Steve Buscemi and date: Charmingly rumpled.

I can't decide if Oprah's BFF Gayle King looks casually elegant, needs a shorter hem, or both.

You've gotta love the rock 'n roll nonchalance Lenny and Zoe Kravitz bring to the red carpet. Everything's a little bit off, yet it all works somehow.

I love that line in Mary J. Blige's The One" where she sings, "I ain't saying that I'm the best; but I'm the best." The lady looks amazing. You are the best, Mary!

[Images via Getty.]

• Whoopi Goldberg on Patrick Swayze:

"Patrick was a really good man, a funny man and one to whom I owe much that I can't ever repay. I believe in Ghost's message, so he'll always be near." [Extra]

• Jennifer Grey on Patrick Swayze: "When I think of him, I think of being in his arms when we were kids, dancing, practicing the lift in the freezing lake, having a blast doing this tiny little movie we thought no one would ever see. [He was] a real cowboy with a tender heart. It was not surprising to me that the war he waged on his cancer was so courageous and dignified." [People]
• Dirty Dancing's choreographer, Kenny Ortega on Patrick Swayze: "The planet has lost a big heart. And I, a forever friend." [People]
• Twitter tributes to Patrick Swayze here. [NY Daily News]
• Kanye West got a talking-to from Taylor Swift's mom backstage at the VMA awards; a source says she "tore into" him after he interrupted Taylor's speech. Additionally, it was Beyoncé's dad, Matthew Knowles, who arranged the moment in which Beyoncé gave Taylor another moment in the spotlight. [People]
• Here a source claims that the Beyoncé/Taylor Swift moment "was all Beyonce's idea. Kanye embarrassed her by bringing her name into it. She wanted to make it right." [MSNBC Scoop]
• 50 Cent on Kanye West's outburst: "We know Beyoncé's great. Nobody's confused in that area…" Fiddy also says: "I wish he would come take one of my awards so I could black his eye in front of everybody." [ONTD via Much Music]
• Did President Obama call Kanye West a jackass? All signs point to yes, but "off the record." [Politico]
• Anna Wintour went to the US Open and left with a tennis ball in her purse! [Page Six]
• Diddy caused a ruckus at post by standing in the street after a VMA party. [Gatecrasher]
• In this video, Michael Jackson admits that he was on pain medication and spent A LOT of time under the influence of prescription drugs in 2003. [The Sun]
• Russell Brand and Katy Perry made out. Pass it on. [Page Six]
• Kim Cattrall spills about Sex And The City Deux: "Expect lots of fun," she says. And: "It was so much fun to relive the wild and crazy fashions of the '80s. I absolutely loved the four different looks of all of us. We were all so uniquely different that we all couldn't stop admiring our different looks. There was lots of laughing, and it was a blast! Working with the three women is so easy. I mean seven years of doing the series and the first movie and now two years later being back feels like being home. It's so much fun. There is a saying that you can't go home again but on Sex and the City, you can." [People]
• This report says that Sex And The City 2 will see Carrie pregnant; a commenter snipes: "Isn't she like 123 years old by now? And Big should be reaching 156. Why would they have a baby? I hope this isn't the case." [Gatecrasher]
• LOL: Jon Gosselin was overheard saying "please write something nice about me" at an In Touch party. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Mr. Big, aka Chris Noth, is engaged, and it's not to Carrie: Noth has proposed to partner Tara Lynn Wilson, with whom he has a 19-month-old son. [Ok!]
• If you missed Lady Gaga and date Kermit the Frog on the red carpet at the MTV Awards, there's video here. [MTV]
• Kelly Osbourne's dropped about 14 lbs. in just three weeks, thanks to insane training for Dancing With The Stars. She says: "It's so amazing, I've tried so many stupid fad diets to try to lose weight, when all I needed to do was start dancing." And: "‘I'm actually really small, I just photograph fat." [Daily Mail]
• Colin Farrell says he's psyched to have a new kid on the way: "I'm very excited man! Very! There is nothing more exciting really." [People]
• Ricky Gervais has a crush on Rob Lowe. [Mirror]
• Brittany "Bre" Scullark from America's Next Top Model was arrested in New York on Monday for picking up some woman's laptop at a Starbucks — thinking it belonged to a family member — and then cursing out the woman. [TMZ]
• "Jessica Simpson sees dog snatched by coyote and appeals for its return on Twitter (does she think the offending beast can read?)" [Daily Mail]
• Sean Penn and hot model Jessica White: Still on. [Page Six]
• The Seinfeld reunion is really an "anti-reunion." [Reuters]
• Kim Kardashian will appear on the new Fox sitcom Brothers, opposite Michael Strahan and Daryl "Chill" Mitchell. "Even though I'm playing myself, you kind of have to play it up a little bit," Kim says. "I always get a little bit nervous because I am new to acting and I respect it so much, so I just want to do it justice." But, um, you're playing yourself. [People]
• The scene: A VMA party. Champagne! Celebrities! Stephanie Pratt's credit card: declined. [Page Six]
• A New York theater doing The Piven Monologues, comic look at the star's case of mercury poisoning, has received a cease and desist letter from Jeremy Piven. [Page Six]
• Jane Fonda has penned a HuffPo essay about her letter protesting the Toronto International Film Festival's decision to showcase and celebrate Tel Aviv. She writes: "As I said in my recent blog, the greatest "re-branding" of Israel would be to celebrate that country's long standing, courageous and robust peace movement by helping to end the blockade of Gaza through negotiations with all parties to the conflict, and by stopping the expansion of West Bank settlements. That's the way to show Israel's commitment to peace, not a PR campaign." [Huffington Post]
• "It's the last leg of Eddie Izzard's 43 marathons in 51 days. How did the less than athletic comic pull off such a feat of endurance?" [BBC News]
• Home Depot will start selling Martha Stewart stuff in 2010, when her deal with K-Mart ends. [Reuters]
• The late Bea Arthur was remembered at Broadway's Majestic Theatre on Monday. [NY Post, People]
• At the Bea Arthur memorial, Rue McClanahan told a touching story in which Bea said: "Rue, I love. Betty White's a cunt." [Page Six]
• "A famous celebrity raped me and Peter knows who it was. It was years ago before I was with Pete, and my friends and family knew about it at the time." — Katie "Jordan" Price. [Daily Mail]
• "I think music piracy is having a dangerous effect on British music, but some really rich and successful artists like Nick Mason from Pink Floyd and Ed O'Brien from Radiohead don't seem to think so. These guys from huge bands said file sharing music is fine. It probably is fine for them. They do sell out arena tours and have the biggest Ferrari collections in the world. For new talent though, file sharing is a disaster as it's making it harder and harder for new acts to emerge. I don't think what's out there is perfect. It's stupid that kids can't buy anything on the internet without credit, forcing them to steal Mum's credit card or download illegally." — Lily Allen. [Telegraph]
• "No one was injured. In fact, the only one who seemed irritated by the whole affair was a tiny Jewish woman who kept saying, 'I don't care who is in the limo. I have somewhere to be!'" — Joan Rivers, whose limo sideswiped a bus yesterday. [Page Six]
• "I hate when celebrities make a big deal of themselves. When I talk to Diddy, I'm just like ‘Hey Sean, no big deal.'" — Jon Gosselin. [MSNBC Scoop]
• "He slapped me once but he got hit on the head three times by me… [I] was horrified he spit on me, in my face." — Whitney Houston, on Bobby Brown. [NY Daily News]

• Chris Brown, currently on his National Bow Tie Apology Tour, says he's ready to meet with a counselor: "I want to understand my feelings. I want to find out what really transpired as far as me that night."[People]

• "Sometimes when you're young you don't know how to express [your emotions]," Brown says, "so I think it actually would be helpful to talk to a counselor or to somebody who has an expertise in what those [feelings] are." [People]
• Kim Kardashian is busy planning her sister, Kourtney's baby shower: "
  "The baby is coming," Kim says, "All this stuff is going to take so much time, and it's going to be exciting at the same time." The sisters will no doubt spend most of the party discussing the baby, who will most likely be named Klara or Korin or Kashlee or some such. [People]
• Lori Petty has pled no contest to DUI in connection with a drunken driving arrest from last May and currently has completed 30 days of her court-ordered 60 day outpatient alcohol-treatment program. [TMZ]
• "Scientology is something that's been in my life for 18 years. It's so greatly helped me. Helps me keep the stress down, the happiness up and gives me tools for living a better life. I kind of ignore all the craziness in the press."- Jenna Elfman [LATimes]
• In awesome news: Tim Gunn is set to star in his own Marvel comic book storyline titled "Loaded Gunn," wherein he will fight "crimes against fashion." The comic is part of Marvel's reintroduction of the 60's series "Models, Inc." Maybe he'll use his superpowers to find out whatever happened to Andrae? [AP]
• "We don't target the kind of people who wear money, you know, those that would kill to have the latest designer handbag. We are more for the disenfranchised. We have a punk attitude, I guess."- Boy George on his new clothing line, B-Rude. [People]
• Anna Paquin enjoys working with her boyfriend, Stephen Moyer: "It's great to have the freedom to enjoy your work and not feel like you're leaving your other life behind. It's a pretty sweet setup." [People]
• Susan Boyle's dream appears to be coming true: her album, which doesn't even hit stores until November, is currently #1 on Amazon's best-seller list. [E!]
• Rev. Al Sharpton apparently forgot about the "private" aspect of Michael Jackson's private memorial service and Tweeted his way through the entire ceremony. [E!]
• "We would like to thank all of Michael's loving fans for their tremendous support, and ask that in Michael's memory give of yourself to the charities he believed in, and keep the magic going!"-LaToya Jackson [People]
• Just in case you care: Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo are totally "hanging out" again. [People]
• "Wonderful. One of the absolute best I've worked with. For me, it's her and Jodie Foster. You just don't get any better than that."-Anthony Hopkins on his The Wolf Man co-star, Emily Blunt. [DailyExpress]
• The Edge was quite embarrassed when he realized that a song he'd written sounded a little too close to the a White Stripes tune: "I went back and listened, and it wasn't exactly (Seven Nation Army), but it was way too close," he says, "I played it for Jack [White], and he was like, 'Mmm, it's a bit close, isn't it?'" [DailyExpress]
• Jack Tweed the widower of British reality star Jade Goody, has been arrested on charges that he raped a 19-year-old woman. [DailyMail]
• Apparently, the new female Saturday Night Live hires were replacements, not additions, as Casey Wilson and Michaela Watkins won't be returning to the show this season. [TheComicsComic]
• Screen legend Gary Cooper will be honored with his own postage stamp. [UPI]
• Mark Wahlberg and wife Rhea Durham who already have three children together, are expecting their fourth. [USWeekly]
• "I, in no way, support the destruction of Israel. I am for the two-state solution. I have been to Israel many times and love the country and its people."-Jane Fonda, in response to accusations by Rabbi Marvin Hier that her signature on a letter stating that Tel Aviv was built on destroyed Palestinian villages is a sign that she supports "the complete destruction of Israel." [TMZ]
• The paparazzi is making life tough for Robert Pattinson: "It's a nightmare," says a source, "He almost never leaves the hotel except to go to the set. And when he does, the crew has to go great lengths to find ways to transport him from one location to another undetected. Because of the paparazzi, Rob has been unable to interact with his many fans." Sleep with one eye open, paparazzi. The Twihards do not take kindly to being blocked from their sparkly vampire dreamboats. [ShowbizSpy]
• "The film should be on airlines in two months and off everyone's resume within three. No animals including the horse were injured making the film, so "Steve" counts as no great crime. Bit it does leave one question: Why did anybody think an attractive female star should wear red boots in every scene of a movie?"-Kirk Honeycutt on the Sandra Bullock.Bradley Cooper film, All About Steve. [Reuters]

• Lily Allen was performing in Helsinki, Finland when she burst into tears. Before the show, she Tweeted:

"Fell over badly last night and I've really fucked my back up. Just had an injection in my bum. How am I gonna get through tonight's gig?" Throwing out your back is terrible! So is Lily's hair/makeup in these pix. [Daily Mail]

• Bill Maher said he once saw Brad Pitt roll the most perfect joint he had ever seen. "I'm an artist," Brad agreed. [NY Daily News]
• Brad Pitt is being added to Guy Ritchie's Sherlock Holmes as the detective's arch enemy. The character of Moriarty was missing from a rough cut of the film, and movie execs insisted the famous nemesis be added to the flick. Ritchie called old pal Pitt (who was in Snatch) and he'll film this week in London. [Mirror]
• The Dancing With The Stars season 9 cast: Revealed! Macy Gray, Melissa Joan Hart, Kathy Ireland, Mya, Iron Chef host Mark Dacascos, Ashley Hamilton, former Dallas Cowboy Michael Irvin, Donny Osmond, Tom DeLay (?!?!?!), Olympic swimming gold medalist Natalie Coughlin, model Joanna Krupa, Debi Mazar, Kelly Osbourne, Aaron Carter, Chuck Liddell, and snowboarder Louie Vito. [ABC News]
• Jennifer Aniston complimented a woman pole-dancing on the set of The Bounty, saying she looked like a professional. The lady replied, "I am!" [Gatecrasher]
• George Clooney plans to sue a photographer who climbed over the wall of his Lake Como home and took pictures of a 13-year-old girl changing in a guest room, as well as snaps of Clooney and gf Elisabetta Canalis. Cloons says: "I don't know about the law in the United States, but in Italy it's illegal for photographers to climb over my wall. He'll also press charges against two magazines who published the photos. [Gatecrasher]
• Beyoncé: Secretly taking ballet classes at Alvin Ailey School of Dance. [Gatecrasher]
• Jon Gosselin went to a party thrown by a student at Parsons School Of Design. He only stayed for 20 minutes, but arrived with a paparazzo and left with two female students. Keepin' it classy. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Even though Paula Abdul won't be on Dancing With The Stars, she MIGHT get a ABC show of her own. Paula's Wacky Clappy Variety Show? [TMZ]
• Madonna performed in Warsaw on Saturday even though it was a holy date, the Assumption of Mary feast. National group Pro Polonia called her a "crypto-Satanist," which is not very crypto. [Daily Express]
• Bob Dylan was on tour and took a walk in Long Branch, NJ, when he was stopped by cops; a resident had reported someone "wandering" around the neighborhood. A cop asked him for I.D. "I don't think she was familiar with his entire body of work," says a town official. [NY Daily News]
• Jennifer Lopez is looking pretty hot on the cover of InStyle and inside she's saying stuff like: "There's nothing as huge as giving birth to another human being and having to be responsible for another life. There's you before kids, and there's you after kids – and they're not the same you." [People]
• Mark Wahlberg was rushed to the hospital on Friday morning after suffering smoke inhalation on the set of The Frighter. A smoke machine was being used for atmosphere and Wahlberg breathed in too much. [RadarOnline, Daily Express]
• Amy Winehouse's divorce from Blake Fielder-Civil will be finalized at the end of the month, but Blake allegedly told a reporter: "I want to take her out for dinner and propose again. I hope that within five minutes we'll be planning where we're next going to get married." [Daily Mail]
• Blake also says: "She is looking beautiful and healthy now and it reminds me of the old Amy." [News Of The World]
• Amy will appear on Strictly Come Dancing in September as a backup singer for her 13-year-old goddaughter Dionne Bromfield, and there's a cute picture of them hugging at the link. [Mirror]
• Bodysnarky opening sentence of the day: "She's looking thinner than ever, but there's one part of Victoria Beckham that looks set to put on a lot of weight very quickly - her wallet. Posh Spice has landed a £3million contract on American Idol…" [Daily Mail]
• Joe Simpson is pushing Jessica Simpson as the perfect replacement for Paula Abdul on American Idol. [Page Six]
• Saturday night after a Fall Out Boy show, Ashlee Simpson and husband Pete Wentz were at a bar when Ashlee got wasted, yelled at Pete and made him leave his own party early. Charming! [Perez]
• Jane Fonda, 71, might marry 67-year-old Richard Perry next year, which would be her fourth wedding. [Daily Express]
• So many contradictory stories about MJ. We first heard that he was strong during rehearsals. This report claims: "Michael Jackson was so weak in his final days he needed to be SPOON-FED meals, his make-up artist has revealed." [The Sun]
• "Michael Jackson's body has been moved in secret to a new crypt, where it's been frozen." [Daily Express]
• This report claims that Michael Jackson will be buried on what would have been his 51st birthday, August 29. Or so says Joe Jackson. [Gatecrasher]
• You know how Michael Phelps was in a car accident last week? Turns out he was driving with an expired license and told cops he had a beer about an hour before the crash. [TMZ]
• George Michael on his car smashup: "Neither of us was charged because we were both stone cold sober. We both think the other is to blame so this is just an insurance fight." [E!]
• Eva Longoria is expanding her restaurant business, and soon she'll have a Beso Vegas and "Besitos" in ariports. [People]
• Kristin Bauer, who plays Pam on True Blood, thinks Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer will have kids together since Anna is "great" with Stephen's kids from previous relationships. [E!]
• Tons of Gossip Girl spoilers at the link, and yes, there are details on Chuck and Blair — with a HOT picture of the Bass. [People]
• Matthew Settle — Gossip Girl's Rufus — skateboards through New York during rush hour. [NY Times]
• Actress Aishwarya Rai has a chest infection with flu-like symptoms. [Times Of India]
• Anna Friel will play Holly Golightly in an upcoming stage production of Breakfast At Tiffany's in London. [Times Of London]
• The Office's Amy Ryan — who plays Holly Flax — is pregnant. [E!]
• An excerpt of Alana Stewart's book, My Journey With Farrah: A Story Of Life, Love And Friendship, at the link. [Daily Mail]
• Bananarama's back. [Daily Mail]
• Aberdeen, Washington has the title of one hometown hero Kurt Cobain's songs, "Come As You Are," posted at the entrance of town. An unofficial park has been established next to the bridge under which Cobain hung out and wrote songs. [LA Times]
• Blind item! "Which D-list relationship recently ended when the gal found out her man's secret vice was boy-on-boy action?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I can't tell you how far from a gold-digger I am. I've never dated a rich man in my life. I've always wondered how girl friends of mine could even ask their boyfriends to buy them clothes." — Samantha Burke, who was impregnated by Jude Law. [Daily Mail]
• "I thought it was an incredibly sexual role and a challenge to be an 'older woman' in the film. Roles always challenge me in some personal way and that was one I wanted to overcome: 'Wow, all of a sudden, you've become the "Older Woman" in a movie. Let's give the younger ones a run for their money.'" — Anne Heche on playing opposite Ashton Kutcher in Spread. [LA Times]
• "This season, I really want to get back to the guerilla style I used to have. I want to try to get back to my roots and make it crazy. In the first episode, I get buried alive in a coffin, six feet under 5,000 pounds of snow. I want people to realize I'm not complacent because I have a little bit of success and a little money. Hopefully in return I can raise the level of the art form to the level other art forms receive, like the cinema.… I just really loved the ability as a kid to do something that adults didn't understand. It was like power. Then I realized as a teenager that there was more to the art of magic than how you did it. It's trying to connect to somebody." — Criss Angel, whose Mindfreak is back on A&E for its 5th season. [LA Times]
• "I like everything about filming except the acting. In recent years I've had really bad attacks where I totally froze up. I thought 'Well, if I am going to get stage fright, then I am packing it in.'" — Hugh Grant. [Daily Mail]
• "I think anybody that's touring is going to have a carbon footprint. I think it's probably unfair to single out rock 'n' roll. There's many other things that are in the same category but as it happens we have a program to offset whatever carbon footprint we have." — The Edge, annoyed by critics of U2's travel. [Daily Express]
• "The Harry Potter books are not explicitly religious in the way that C.S. Lewis's Narnia tales are, but there is a strong sense of evil, and issues of good and evil are not only philosophical issues but also theological issues." —University of Massachusetts-Amherst philosophy professor Gareth B. Matthews. [UPI]
• "I think when I started I was working in the vein of The Dirty Dozen or The Devil's Brigade. But now watching the completed film with audiences, I don't think there has ever been a World War II movie like it. That can be a good thing or a bad thing, depending on your taste, but it's definitely a thing." — Quentin Tarantino on Inglourious Basterds. [WSJ]
• "Don Cheadle could play me, but I hope they just go with the obvious casting choice." — Richard Belzer, when asked who would play Richard Belzer if his crime novel about a a New York City police detective named Richard Belzer were made into a TV show. [Publishers Weekly]
• "I've had my heart broken before. Truly, truly broken. But when I look back at me in my heartbroken phase, it's pretty hilarious, because it felt so much more extreme than it really was. One of the things I love about (500) Days of Summer is that it doesn't make light of what we go through in romances, but it is honest about it and shows it for what it is, which is often profoundly funny." — Joseph Gordon-Levitt. [Guardian]
• "The speed of news creates so much vertigo. I am a very private person." — Penelope Cruz. [Telegraph]
• "We kind of rolled our eyes at the idea of having to make out." — Amanda Seyfried on her Jennifer's Body girl-on-girl scene with Megan Fox. [Page Six via Entertainment Weekly]
• "I remember really vividly kneeling by my bed as a nine-year-old, saying my prayers and asking God to give me boobs that were so big that if I laid on my back I wouldn't be able to see my feet. Eventually that request was granted. A bit of divine intervention displays the power of prayer. Every time before I go on stage, or go out where I know there will be a lot of press, I take a skipping rope and spend about ten minutes, fully clothed, skipping. I look like Rocky. This way I can ensure that everything is firmly in place and I won't have a wardrobe malfunction. Don't want those boulders doing a show of their own." — Katy Perry. [The Sun]

• Remember this report that Quentin Tarantino asked Brad Pitt to join the cast of Inglourious Basterds over some wine and some weed?

Quentin says: "That was Brad. He did the fabrication. He can take a Coke can and make it - functional." [NY Mag]

• Unsolicited uterus update: "Is Penelope Cruz pregnant?" Is she? [Page Six]
• Matt Damon has launched a new humanitarian project, Water.org, aimed at bringing clean water sources to nearly 890 million people at risk of disease. [Mirror]
• "Why I Waited Until 44 To Do My First Nude Scene, By The Proposal Star Sandra Bullock." Actually, she doesn't explain that, but she does say: "If you're naked and you're trying to be sexy — you don't really make as much money as if you're naked and you're funny." [Daily Mail]
• NYC Artist Dash Snow has died of a drug overdose; his brother, Maxwell Snow, dated Mary-Kate Olsen. [ONTD, Page Six]
• What will the Harry Potter stars do after the the movies are over? Daniel Radcliffe hopes to head back to the stage, but also "sleep"; Emma Watson will attend college, but would like to work with directors Alfonso Cuaron and Guillermo del Toro; Rupert Grint says: "I look forward to seeing what else is out there and to move on, really." [USA Today]
• In a poll, Hermione was voted the favorite Harry Potter character. And! "Some 51% thought [Emma] Watson would have the best post-Potter career, with a large majority (67 percent) approving the idea of her appearing naked." Eyeroll! [Reuters]
• Uh, the Vatican approves of the latest Harry Potter movie, since it makes the debate over good versus evil crystal clear. [Mirror]
• Madonna's boyfriend Jesus Luz is "resentful" that Guy Ritchie has been hanging around lately. But, you know, Madge and Guy were married for eight years and have three kids together. So. As for Jesus, a source says Madonna likes him because "He's pretty and she can boss him around." [Gatecrasher]
• Pity the Poles! Britney's Circus tour won't be stopping in Warsaw, due to a contractual dispute. [AP]
• Robert Redford got married on Saturday! The bride was a German Fräulein named Sibylle Szaggars; the ceremony took place at St. Catherine Church in Hamburg. Herzlichen Glückwunsch! [AP]
• Nicole Kidman's daughter, Sunday Rose, has turned one year old, and Nic and husband Keith Urban celebrated with a "little cake." Also, Keith says, "My wife made a beautiful video that covered her first year and we gave that to all the family." The kid is already a film star. [Daily Express]
• David Beckham has a new tattoo: The ring of roses around his arm has one flower for each year of marriage to wife Victoria. Sweet. [Daily Mail]
• Is Simon Cowell worth £100 million a year? That's what he's negotiating for to stay on American Idol. [Mirror]
• An X Factor fan lost her purse and Simon Cowell gave her a wad of his own cash. He can spare it! [EW]
• The LAPD is treating Michael Jackson's death as a homicide, and Dr. Conrad Murray is the focus of the investigation. [TMZ]
• Debbie Rowe's lawyer denies that she accepted $4 million to walk away from the custody battle. He says: "Ms. Rowe has not accepted — and will not accept — any additional financial consideration beyond the spousal support she and Michael Jackson personally agreed to several years ago." The New York Post printed a story claiming that Rowe had struck a deal with the Jackson family, and her lawyer is calling it "unequivocally false." [TMZ, CBS News, Reuters]
• Debbie Rowe sent emails to a friend which say: "I'm not going after custody. These kids are not mine. They were never mine. They were always Michael's. I was Michael's best friend." [Extra]
• Dr. Arnold Klein, Michael Jackson's dermatologist, is not fully cooperating with official requests for medical records. [TMZ]
• The DEA is trying to find out who supplied Michael Jackson with the powerful anesthesia Propofol. [TMZ]
• "A maker of the potent anesthetic propofol found in Michael Jackson's home has been contacted by federal officials investigating the pop star's death and has recalled tens of thousands of vials of the drug after two tainted lots sickened dozens of patients." [AP]
• "I never saw him on drugs. Not once. He deliberately did it away from us. He didn't want his family to know anything about that part of him." — Tito Jackson on Michael's drug use. [Mirror]
• Jack Wishna, a Las Vegas businessman who tried to organized comeback shows for Michael Jackson, says the pop star would move a bunch of mattresses on to the floor so he and all his kids could play, jump up and down and sleep in the same room. In addition, he would leave his Christmas trees up for about seven months. [E!]
• At this link, you'll find similarities and differences between real-life super agent Ari Emanuel and the character inspired by him, Entourage's Ari Gold. [Independent]
• Zooey Deschanel was supposed to headline a screening and Q&A of her film 500 Days Of Summer on Monday, but she'd already headed to Ireland where she's shooting Your Highness, a fantasy flick in which she plays a princess. Zooey sent a recorded statement in which she said, "Umm, I guess I should maybe answer a few questions preemptively. ... I did the movie because I liked it." [Observer]
• Vanessa Hudgens will be in a movie called Bandslam, playing a character named Sa5m, and — this is important — the 5 is silent. [People]
• Emily Blunt joins Matt Damon in Adjustment Bureau, a movie based on a Philip K. Dick short story. [Variety]
• Russell Brand: The voice of the Easter Bunny. In a live action/CGI family comedy called I Hop, to be released in March 2011. [Variety]
• Miley Cyrus will star in Wings, a movie based on a novel about a high-school girl who sprouts a pair of wings and learns that she is a fairy. [Variety]
• Hugh Jackman's signed on to appear in Avon Man, in which guys laid off from an auto dealership end up working as Avon salesmen. Jackman + makeup + comedy? We're in. [Variety]
• Usher has a summer camp, Camp New Look, that invites 130 children to spend two weeks in Atlanta learning about the business side of sports and entertainment. Hey says: "These kids come here and they're like 'Oh, wow … we're going to learn about entertainment!' But they leave engaged in life and knowing that, 'I can have a future outside of music.' That's what makes me most proud." [USA Today]
• Uh-oh. Robert De Niro is a victim of an art scam? He is gonna take you down. Take you down to Chinatown. [Reuters]
• Hmm, I didn't know that Rashida Jones was dating President Obama's speechwriter, Jon Favreau. Where have I been? [Page Six]
• Q-Tip has inked a deal to publish his memoir, titled Industry Rules. Is one chapter titled "I Left My Wallet In El Segundo"? [mediabistro.com]
• Interesting piece about Angie Dickinson, who starred in the 1974-78 NBC series Police Woman, for which she earned a Golden Globe award and Emmy nominations as L.A. police officer Sgt. Pepper Anderson. The show paved the way for future female-driven cop shows. [LA Times]
• Congrats To Joey McIntyre and his wife, who are expecting their second child in December. [People]
• Some guy was trying to sue Janet Jackson, claiming that her bodyguards beat him up in a club, but the case was dismissed due to a lack of evidence. [Goathamist]
• Aerosmith bass player Tom Hamilton is recovering from non-invasive surgery and will miss some tour dates. [Reuters]
• Jane Fonda and music producer Richard Perry: It's on. [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which grungy young starlet's idea of a good time is getting stoned with her ex-hippie parents?" [Gatecrasher]
• "When you have three kids, you've got to take your opportunities when they come. In a limo, on the way to the Academy Awards this year, Will started looking at me in this way that drives me wild. We started kissing passionately, and the next thing I knew, well, let's just say we missed the red carpet and I ended up with almost no makeup on." — Jada Pinkett Smith spills about her sex life. [Page Six]
• "[She] wipes the floor with me every time I play her." — Daniel Radcliffe, who says Emma Watson is a pro at table tennis. [The Sun]
• "I respect criticism. But I know more about film than most of the people writing about me. Not only that, I'm a better writer than most of the people writing about me. And I can write film criticism better than most of the people writing about me. [My goal was] to get the biggest standing ovation of the festival, and I got it [...] Sometimes it's your time to be Elvis, and that was my time." — Quentin Tarantino, on the mixed reviews of Inglourious Basterds and its reception at Cannes. [NY Mag]
• "I'm a trained astronaut, and it's my time to go." — Lance Bass is still hoping to head to space. [Gatecrasher]
• "I don't have his number, so haven't spoken to him. But I can safely say that his insisting that girls would choose me over him that they would not. That they do not. He is the much prettier and can be much more charming. And he can do that thing of being sultry and sexy." — Daniel Radcliffe, on Robert Pattinson. [The Daily Beast]
• "Although my grief over Michael could not be any deeper, I am not on suicide watch as some of the cheaper 'rags' would have you believe." — Elizabeth Taylor. [CNN]

[Los Angeles, July 13. Image via x17]

• Here's the first picture of Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick with their new twins, Marion and Tabitha Broderick. Big brother James, are you ready for double trouble? [TMZ]

• Britney Spears has dark hair and something that looks like an engagement ring. What does it mean??? [NY Daily News]
• Uh-oh: Us Weekly dropped $120,000 for exclusive rights to Kendra Wilkinson's wedding, but the death of Michael Jackson will push her bridal bliss off the cover. [Page Six]
• Will Michael Jackson's body be put on display in a coffin of glass, like Eva Peron? [The Sun]
• Michael Jackson's mother has been granted temporary guardianship of his three kids. [LA Times]
• According to a source, Michael Jackson almost died once before — in 2004 — he was unconscious and had to be revived. [Fox News]
• Michael Jackson's doctor didn't call 911 for a half hour after finding MJ unconscious. [TMZ]
• The LAPD is trying to identify and interview "multiple doctors" who treated or prescribed medicine to Michael Jackson. [LA Times]
• Michael Jackson's mother Katherine is worried about people stealing from MJ's estate. [TMZ]
• Debbie Rowe has been reaching out to the Jackson family, but has been unsuccessful. [People]
• A will drafted by Michael Jackson in 2002 may be released this week. [WSJ]
• "Michael Jackson's Last Art Purchase." A wicked witch painting. [TMZ]
• "Michael Jackson was spending £30,000 a month on prescription drugs," says this paper, which lied to us yesterday. [The Sun]
• "Michael Jackson's Death: Sorting Fact From Fiction." A run down of all the claims and contradictions. [NY Daily News]
• Two weeks before he died, Michael Jackson completed a video project; his last. [AP]
• Expect some "instant" Michael Jackson books — some due by the end of the week, one coming in July. [AP]
• Michael Jackson's "This Is It" tour is being transformed into a tribute concert in September, and Madonna may take part. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Here is Lindsay Lohan posing like Michael Jackson. [NY Daily News]
• Ladies and gentlemen, a statement from Jon and Kate Gosselin: "During this very difficult time we will be working to focus solely on the needs of our family. This includes no longer commenting publicly or reacting to media stories and speculation. Our goal is to do the very best for our children and that will be done as privately as possible. We appreciate the understanding, support and well wishes from so many. Thank you." [TLC]
• Chris Brown was not at the BET Awards because Al Sharpton and Jay-Z were "very vocal" with producers about not letting him appear. [Gatecrasher]
• A source says: "Jay-Z wasn't having it. He threatened to pull out of the show if Chris was involved, so BET dropped Chris." [Page Six]
• Chris Brown's friend Teairra Mari says: "He's sorry. That's my friend, and I love Chris. He's a good kid-he just made a mistake. He knows that and feels terrible about it." [E!]
• Justin Timberlake went out boozing with Guy Ritchie, and guess which one went home at 2:30am and which one stayed in the pub? Guy was in it til the bitter end. [The Sun]
• How is the filming of The Runaways going? Well, Joan Jett made Kristen Stewart cry. So. [Gatecrasher]
• Some GQ Brüno pictures in which the character is posing with a high school football team have infuriated a school official in L.A., who says: "We've allowed our students to be used, and not in the most glamorous circumstances either." [UPI]
• Susan Boyle on Ugly Betty? Why, yes. [Telegraph]
• Amy Winehouse has been banned from taking in any more stray dogs after resort management had to fumigate her house in St. Lucia. [The Sun]
• George Clooney is not dead. Why are there so many death pranks? That shit is not funny. [TMZ]
• Kate Moss's boyfriend Jamie Hince is getting tired of Kate's lengthy karaoke sessions and is limiting her to half an hour a day. [The Sun]
• Lady GaGa visited an HIV Support Centre in Manchester, UK yesterday, and said: "I've been doing volunteer work since I was two." She also said: "I want to make it fashionable to have safe sex. You must be safe. You can have sex with hundreds of people with a condom on and get nothing. If you have sex without one, then you could get all sorts of problems." To which this paper asks, "Speaking from experience?" [The Sun]
• Ashton Kutcher is Tweeting for the White House. No, really. [Politico]
• Kathy Griffin on NPR! "NPR listeners, I know who you are. I know you guys read books, which I find tedious. You guys might try a book called Us Weekly. OK? It's a really good book. It has a lot of pictures." [NPR]
• Megan Fox spent the weekend in Las Vegas with Brian Austin Green. Back together? [E!]
• Someone threw a drink on Anna Kournikova at a club in Vegas and the tennis player "sprang into action," showing and screaming at the lady. [Page Six]
• Marissa Jaret Winokur continues to blog about her "weight loss journey." She writes: "I downloaded the video of Beyoncé's 'Single Ladies' and started to learn her dance. Let me tell you, if I ever did that dance in a club I would still be a single lady!!! But what a workout! It was free and fun and it kept my son very entertained – it was like a real-life Muppet danced out of his TV and into the living room. It kept him and, sadly, my husband very amused for almost an hour." [People]
• "Hollywood stars Antonio Banderas And Melanie Griffiths' Garden Seized As Spain Cracks Down On Illegal Coastal Homes." They'll lose their 40 foot swimming pool! [Daily Mail]
• Is Antonia Kidman — sister of Nicole and TV personality in Australia — addicted to exercise? [News.com.au]
• Redmond O'Neal with be allowed to leave jail to attend his mother Farrah Fawcett's funeral. [People]
• Law And Order: SVU fans, take note: Christopher Meloni and Mariska Hargitay have finally signed on to stay for two more seasons. [Variety]
• Amy Adams is in negotiations to star alongside Christian Bale and Mark Wahlberg in boxing drama The Fighter. [Variety]
• Some kind of drama involving Kanye West's bisexual girlfriend Amber Rose and a singer named Nicki Minaj, who Amber hit on? [ONTD]
• Here's a Q&A with Wilco's Jeff Tweedy, who says: "We did get word that whoever's in charge of loading [Barack Obama's] iPod requested the record and we got the record in." [Time]
• Best wishes to 92-year-old Zsa Zsa Gabor, who is out of the hospital after a 6-day stay for flu-like symptoms. [AP]
• The Nutty Professor is coming to Broadway, and Jerry Lewis will direct. [AP]
• Whatshername and Whatshisname: fighting in public. [Mirror]
• Blind item! "Which former boy bander looked oh-so-strung-out over the weekend? His diet of booze and nose candy certainly isn't helping his skin-and-bones appearance." [Gatecrasher]
• "I don't watch TV comedy in the UK anymore. We've got some poor copies of Curb Your Enthusiasm, some poor copies of Entourage and some poor copies of Seinfeld. With a few exceptions the Americans seem to be ahead of the game." — Ricky Gervais. [The Sun]
• "I pointed to a spot where I told him I wanted to be buried. Michael had a meltdown right then and there when he heard this. He shrieked and bent over and said, 'No, no, no.' [He said,] 'Don't ever talk about your dying. Don't ever think about it.' I couldn't pretend to understand him. There were so many complicated signals. Did he want me to be his 'older woman' friend? He gravitated to older women. For solace? Succor? A beard? Did he want me to teach him the ropes? I never could quite figure it out." — Jane Fonda, on her relationship with Michael Jackson. [E!]
• "I wish I could say that I was inspired by him for a role, I was inspired by him because I think he was a great artist but he was not the inspiration for Willy Wonka contrary to what most people say. No no no, I never ever thought of playing Michael Jackson in a film, I think if anyone should play Michael Jackson in a film it should've been Michael Jackson. A mother and a father have lost a son, siblings have lost a brother and millions of people around the world have lost someone they love. Children have lost a father so it's obviously a very sad, sad moment." — Johnny Depp. [The Star]
• "At the moment I feel like I need to go away and figure out what I want to do and be myself for a bit. I just want to take a step back from it and not rush into stuff. I need university to give me that break. People think because I'm going to university I'm never going to act again, but it's actually me… I want to… figure out how I feel about everything first. Maybe I'll keep acting, maybe I won't. I just want to find something where I feel I have to do this. Maybe that'll happen when I read a script. It felt like that with Hermione. I want to feel like that again." — Emma Watson, who will attend Columbia University in the fall. [Elle UK, NY Daily News]

• Justin Timberlake was supposedly caught cheating on Jessica Biel... by Lindsay Lohan. Linds happened to be at a nightclub in New York and spotted a very drunk Justin holding hands and kissing another woman. She snapped a picture and Tweeted:

• "…where's jb cheater?" Fortunately for Timberlake, the photo is almost completely dark. [Perez Hilton]
• Wait, now Lindsay is claiming that someone hacked into her Twitter, adding "Stop trying to get onto my twitter page whoever you are! Its become extremely creepy!!! Just trying to clear the air! And I'm tired of changing my password every other day!" Suggestion: Try to actually create a strong password? [Perez]
• An anonymous source who supposedly worked for the Gosselins for six months and quit in the summer of 2008, told the National Enquirer that Kate Gosselin used to drink and beat the kids. "By the end of the day after the kids were settled, Kate would drink a bottle of wine by herself. This happened several nights a week," said the source, "Jon didn't usually drink with her, and he didn't seem pleased with it. He'd roll his eyes and tell Kate to put the wine down. She'd answer, 'Screw you. I'll do what I want.'" The source added that once when one of the boys was misbehaving, "she dragged one of the boys into the bathroom and spanked him five or six times with a large plastic mixing spoon. You could hear Kate forcefully whacking the child and the child screaming at the top of his lungs. People told me it happened more than once, but it was off-camera because Kate didn't want it in the show." [The National Enquirer]
• This week the ratings for Jon and Kate Plus 8 were down more than one million viewers from the previous week's episode. This episode had 2.9 million viewers, and their numbers have been dropping since the season premiere, which had 9.8 million viewers. [Us]
• Billy Joel and his third wife, Katie Lee Joel, are divorcing. Their rep said, "After nearly five years of marriage, Billy and Katie have decided to separate. This decision is the result of much thought and consideration. Billy and Katie remain caring friends, with admiration and respect for each other." [NY Daily News]
• Former St. Lucia government spokesman Jeff Fedee has written an article saying Amy Winehouse is a "tattooed reptile" who should not be granted citizenship. He writes, "She would be a menace and a dangerous influence to St Lucian society, because the demons that inhabit her tortured body will still have to be fed and I ask whether the authorities are going to ignore the indulgences in illegal substances for which ordinary St Lucians are arrested and incarcerated." [The Daily Mail]
• Two Ohio police chiefs are under investigation for allegedly plotting to break into the home of the surrogate carrying Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick's twins to find dirt to sell to the tabloids. [E!]
• Matthew Broderick has released a statement through his rep saying, "Matthew and Sarah Jessica have complete faith in the legal system. But because it's a criminal investigation — we will not be making any more comment. What I can say is the entire family looks forward to the healthy delivery of their daughters later on this summer." [TMZ]
• Law enforcement sources say they have evidence that the police chiefs were in on the plot, and that the burglars were looking for voice mail messages left by Sarah Jessica Parker. [TMZ]
• The California Supreme Court has denied a request to delay Chris Brown's hearing date, ruling that it will still be on Monday. [Reuters]
• According to divorce documents filed by Usher, he and wife Tameka Foster Raymond have been separated since July 2008. He said he wants "notes, cards, letters, photographs, film, documents, tapes, voice recordings, gift, jewelry, clothes" or other evidence that reflects on his conduct during their marriage, plus detective reports, photos or recordings that have resulted from either "surveillance or investigation." This may mean that she hired a detective to determine if he was cheating. He has also filed for joint custody of their sons. [Ok]
• Spencer and Heidi Pratt say they'll be back on I'm A Celebrity.... "I actually was just letting NBC know that I am ready to go back," said Spencer. "I'm ready. I got a whole new attitude about it." But they'll have to wait until next season because he says, "We tried to go back but the cast said they would mutiny if we showed up!" [People]
• Jamie Foxx was sued in April because a bartender at a party he was hosting says he needed 170 stitches after falling on broken glass. Now Foxx is suing him because he says he shouldn't have to pay for his defense because it wasn't his responsibility to ensure everyone's safety at the party. [TMZ]
• Beyonce has filed a lawsuit against anonymous parties, claiming they have sold knock-off CDs and merchandise near her concerts around the world. She's asking the court to make it illegal before her upcoming Madison Square Garden concerts. [TMZ]
• Larry Seidlin, the judge who cried during a hearing about Anna Nicole Smith's burial, is being sued by an elderly neighbor who says he took advantage of her by talking her into shady real estate deals and asking her to pay thousands to pay for his mortgage and daughter's tuition. [TMZ]
• ABC has allowed T.R. Knight's to be released from his contract on Gray's Anatomy. He wanted to leave the show three years before his contract was up because he was upset with his character's lack of storyline. [Entertainment Weekly]
• Britain's Advertising Standards Authority has cleared Duffy's Diet Coke commercial in which she rides her bicycle through a supermarket even though 18 people complained that she was not wearing reflective clothing and her bicycle had no lights on it. [BBC]
• Owen Wilson is dating a Kate Hudson look-alike. "Owen's new girl was a dead ringer for Kate Hudson, aside from the fact that she looked young enough to be his daughter. She looked to be just over the legal drinking age!" said the source. [The Daily Express]
• Now that Michael Phelps three-month suspension for being caught smoking pot is over, he has signed a deal to promote H2O Audio's waterproof headphones and accessories. [AP]
• Some scenes in Bruno were reshot after many who saw test screenings said it was incredibly offensive to homosexuals. All we know about the final product is that it now includes a fake-charity song promoting gay marriage and featuring Elton John and Chris Martin. [N.Y. Magazine]
• Jane Fonda had knee replacement surgery yesterday. She Tweeted: "Lying on a guerney [sic]. Drugs are starting to hit. Wheeee. So long left knee. You're toast!" [People]
• Mia Farrow's 66-year-old brother Patrick Farrow killed himself in his art gallery. He was found on Monday with a single gunshot wound to the head. [Yahoo]
• An inquest has ruled that the death last year of Mark Cowperthwaite, 46, a hairdresser who had worked with Julianne Moore and Julie Christie, was a suicide. [The Telegraph]
• Julianne Moore was on Capitol Hill this afternoon advocating for the need to better prepare for children's needs in the case of a disaster. [Politico]
• The 1911 U.K. census has been released, revealing that Kate Winslet's ancestors ran a pub and Kate Middleton's ancestors were members of the Abermarle Club where Oscar Wilde was accused of sodomy. Scandalous! [The Telegraph]
• Orlando Bloom was involved in a fender bender yesterday in L.A. a few miles from where he was in an accident two years ago that injured two of his passengers. [TMZ]
• Guy Ritchie's car was pulled over last night and his driver was given a Breathalyser test and then a ticket. The police drove the car back to Richie's home. [The Daily Mail]
• The New Kids on the Block have cancelled their Australian tour. Donnie Wahlberg wrote on his blog, "We are, in fact, in the middle of a worldwide recession and we just cannot make it work." [BBC]
• Ashton Kutcher is considering an offer to appear in Neil LaBute's Fat Pig on Broadway. [NY Post]
• Project Runway contestants moved into Atlas yesterday to start filming the new season. [NY Magazine]
• Here's an incredibly detailed update on how Courtney Love's new album is coming along. [NME]
• Scout and Tallulah Belle Willis say their dad Bruce Willis has showed them the W photo spread he did, in which he is mostly nude and their step-mother appears topless. Scout said, "We think it's beautiful. It's funny because people keep asking us if they're like that all the time-like, whoa, kinky. And I'm like, 'It's an art editorial.'" [W]
• Chace Crawford says of dating Carrie Underwood: "I have nothing bad to say about that experience. It was awesome. I just didn't know how to deal with it. I learned a ton about dating someone in that kind of spotlight. It was such a whirlwind, but no regrets." [People]
• Paris Hilton is in the United Arab Emirates shooting Paris Hilton's My New BFF: Dubai and blogged that, "Some club in Dubai named BED is falsely advertising everywhere here that I am doing a club appearance at their club tonight. I just want everyone to know that this is not true. I have no idea about this and it is wrong of them to lie to everyone and pretend I am going there." [The Daily Express]
• According to someone who watched Katie Holmes rehearsal for her performance on So You Think You Can Dance she will sing and dance to "Get Happy" as an homage to Judy Garland. [Us]
• Marissa Jaret Winokur, host of Dance Your Ass Off says she gained 25 pounds awaiting the birth of her son, even though a surrogate carried him. "[It was] total stress," she says, "You don't actually have to carry the baby to gain weight." [People]
• We can't even process this rap video Taylor Swift made with T-Pain, so you'll have to watch if for yourself here: [Perez Hilton]
• Anna Paquin says after she was cast on True Blood she realized she'd have to "fell comfortable wearing very little." She says, "After I was cast and realized my body would be exposed all the time, I went out and bought some shorts – I owned none! – to help me get used to it. It's liberating!" [People]
• Hugh Hefner said he has a hard time telling his 19-year-old twin girlfriends Karissa and Kristina Shannon apart. "I have one little trick, one has a little mark," Hef said, pointing to his neck. "Other than that, I don't know." As for the possibility that Robert Downey Jr. will play him in a biopic, he said, "Robert Downey Jr. and I have talked about it, it's a very real possibility. Downey's a marvelous actor, I would be honored." [Fox News]
• Michelle Pfeiffer says that a German reporter's questions offended her on a recent promotional tour. Pfeiffer said: "She asked, 'How does it feel to have an old and decrepit body?' And at first I didn't understand her, I was like, 'Sorry, did you just say I had an old and decrepit body?' and she was like, 'Ja (yes). How does it feel?'" [The Daily Express]
• Lenny Kravitz says he became a Christian after talking to a fellow choirboy at camp. He says, "He was telling me about God and if I knew about Christ. We were in there for a couple of days, really talking about it, and I don't know if we were praying or talking about it at that point but this energy came in the room. It was that kind of thing where you felt the intensity and you felt the heat. And we both felt the same thing because both of us were crying. There wasn't sad or anything. This thing we were feeling... tears were streaming down my face. It was really strange experience. I know the presence of God just came in the room and touched me. That's really the simple explanation. And I knew, that's what it was, and he knew that's what it was." [The Daily Express]
• Ryan Reynolds is shirtless on the new cover of Entertainment Weekly He says he loves Intervention because it's, "Real schadenfreude stuff. The first season or two is all about alcoholics and heroin addicts, but then as the seasons progress, they feel the need to sensationalize it a bit. So by Season 5, you get to people who are chemically unable to experience joy unless they're smoking a cat, or something equally disturbing. I love it." [Just Jared]

The Good: Anne Hathaway looks so glamorous and comfortable and rad that we kinda wonder what she'd do with Gypsy Rose Lee...


The Good: Jane Fonda has mastered glam elegance.


The Good: Loving Jessica Lange's nod to Edith Beale's salad days.


The Good: Headline: ANGELA LANSBURY CHANNELS VICTOR/VICTORIA. Theatre majors swoon.


The Good: So, now that Edie Falco's doing some serious un-glam, it's time to amp it up for the red carpet! Albeit in gently boho fashion.


The Good: Hope Davis' dramatic decollete is one of the evening's best looks. In the metaphysical as well as sartorial sense.


The Dolly: Death, Taxes, Dolly.


The Good: Lauren Graham is one of the awesome emerald brigade of the evening.


The Good: Chandra Wilson is another...


The Good:...Josefina Scaglione makes three!


The Good: Martha Plimpton is Camelot-classy. Seriously, this is vintage-fab.


The Good: Allison Janney brings straight-up Tony no-risk glamour, but there's something to be said for that.


The Good: Julie Chen brings it for all the little girls/Barbie dolls out there.


The Good: Wow! Piper Perabo thrusts herself into our sartorial consciousness!


What Say You? Okay, truth to power: I love Karen Olivo's burlesquey exercise in immoderation, but eager to hear from you!


What Say You? when it comes to Samantha Mathis' little black distressed?


Phyllis Newman is obviously getting some kind of honorary doctorate. What Say You?


The Ugly: The Naked Cowboy Brett Michaels.

[Images via Getty]

• Is Britney being forced to tour? An insider says she's emotionally fragile, but her father insists the show must go on. The source claims:

"It's a freak show right now. [Britney's] phoning every song in. It's pretty obvious she is not happy to be here." [MSNBC via E!]

• Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart hung out after the MTV Movie awards and got cozy and OMG maybe something is going on and OMG it's just like Twilight OMG. [Gatecrasher]
• A source says Susan Boyle has been flooded with offers from all over the world, but Simon Cowell says, "Susan isn't signing anything or doing anything until she is better." Yes, thank you, Captain Obvious. [Daily Express]
• According to this report, Susan Boyle collapsed before being hospitalized — she had been crying all day and then passed out in her room; when she was admitted to the clinic, she wailed, "Where's Pebbles?" Medics arranged a phone call to her "beloved cat." [The Sun]
• This paper calls what happened to Susan Boyle an "anxiety attack." [Mirror]
• BGT Judge Amanda Holden says of Susan Boyle: "It's probably a blessing she didn't win as it takes off some of the pressure. Perhaps now she can relax." [Telegraph]
• Uh, Prince Charles watches Britain's Got Talent? [Telegraph]
• "Susan Boyle and Jon & Kate Gosselin are victims ... and YOU'RE to blame." [NY Daily News]
• In a poll, 48% of people who bothered to answer think that the eight Gosselin kids from Jon & Kate Plus 8 will be worse off for having taken part in the show. [USA Today]
• So, are Jon and Kate's "plus 8" being exploited? This columnist writes, "Of course they are." [MSNBC Scoop]
• What does Nadya Suleman think of all this? "[Kate] needs to stop being so judgmental and stop pulling at straws for attention. My children are extremely healthy, strong and happy. Don't you have, like, a lot of issues in your life? A lot of marital problems? Why are you so desperate to glob on to my life? For attention?" Wait, what? [Radar Online]
• Lady GaGa would like to have a foursome with the Jonas Brothers. "I love them. They're very talented!" [Gatecrasher]
• Beth Ditto looks pretty awesome on the cover of Attitude magazine. Inside, she calls "I Kissed A Girl" a "boner dyke" anthem for "straight girls who like to turn guys on by making out or like faking gay." And! She says: "I hate Katy Perry! She's offensive to gay culture, I'm so offended. She's just riding on the backs of our culture, without having to pay any of the dues and not being actually lesbian or anything at all. She's on the cover of a fucking gay magazine." [Perez]
• Amy Winehouse's "Caribbean detox" is not exactly going as planned: By 9am she's had two shots of tequila, and this reporter says, "You can see scars which indicate that she has been self-harming - cutting herself - again and there are two cigarette burns on her stomach, which are healing." A worker in the resort says: "Over the past couple of weeks she's been drinking more and more. She used to have colour in her drinks - you know, juice - but now all I can see is clear liquid." [Daily Mail]
• Remember that Maserati Lindsay Lohan was cruising around in? It's yours, if you have $25,000 — check eBay. Fender benders? What fender benders? [TMZ]
• Shia LaBeouf will star in the latest John Grisham novel-turned-movie. [Gatecrasher]
• Adam Lambert's mom was asked about her son's sexuality and said, "I would rather not answer until it comes out." Interesting choice of words! She also says: "We signed a contract with Idol and unless it has been set up by them, I'm not allowed to answer." [E!]
• You probably guessed this, but the Eminem/Bruno stunt at the MTV Movie Awards was staged. [EW, LA Times]
• An insider says that Eminem was actually the second choice — Paris Hilton was MTV's first choice. Eminem was definitely the funnier choice. [Life & Style]
• Evan Rachel Wood: Seen making out with Shane West in Las Vegas. [Page Six]
• Some stalkerazzo asked Michael Jackson if he was gonna tour with the Jackson 5 and MJ nodded yes, so TMZ is reporting that there will indeed be a special one-night concert with the Jackson 5 and Janet in Texas. [TMZ]
• The very fabric of the world unravels as we discover that Robert De Niro stole his famous "You talkin' to me?" line in Taxi Driver from Bruce Springsteen. [Daily Express]
• What will Olympic gymnast and Dancing With The Stars winner Shawn Johnson do next? Go to college. She's narrowed it down to Stanford or UCLA and says, "I'm not sure what I'll be studying yet. Maybe I'll choose something in the medical field." [Gatecrasher]
• Nicole Kidman dropped out of a Woody Allen movie, in which she was to play a call girl, and Brit actress Lucy Punch has taken over the role. She has similar alabaster skin, so maybe that's integral to the part? [Page Six]
• What the world needs now: A Dubai version of Paris Hilton's My New BFF. Except, since it's the UAE, there's no alcohol, and swearing, sexually explicit conversation or risque clothing will be kept to a minimum. How sad is it that we live in a world where it's hard to picture a reality show without all that? [Variety]
• The Veronicas are in talks with MTV about launching a reality show in the U.S. — it would be a behind-the-scenes look at their life in the music scene. [News.com.au]
• Mel Gibson: Hasn't been taking communion recently. Probably because, technically, he is an adulterer. [People]
• Peter Andre is now living in a "huge seaside pad" in Hove, East Sussex — just a 30 minute drive from his estranged wife Katie "Jordan" Price and their kids. [The Sun]
• Here, the manse is called his "dream home." [Daily Mail]
• Peter Andre says: "I've been 100 per cent faithful throughout my marriage and still am." [Mirror]
• Put on your blonde wig and sing: The Disney Channel has ordered a fourth season of Hannah Montana. [Variety]
• The subject of the NY Times' Frequent Flier column today is Duff McKagan, of Guns N' Roses, Velvet Revolver and Loaded. He talks about bribing immigration officers of South American countries so his band could get in, and says: "Although I've never been convicted of a felony or even a misdemeanor, I have a suspicion that I'm persona non grata in airports. I'm always the guy that gets 'randomly' selected for a more thorough security check. I'm really the most nonthreatening of travelers. I mean, how much of a scene can I cause when I spend time doing crossword puzzles? I'm actually a crossword puzzle fanatic." [NY Times]
• Stephen Dorff is dating his publicist. [Page Six]
• Alyssa Milano will star in and produce a romcom called My Girlfriend's Boyfriend. The plot: An outgoing woman meets two seemingly ideal men in quick succession — a struggling novelist and successful ad exec — and must decide between them. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Excellent news: Sade is working on her first album in nine years. [Reuters]
• "A previously unseen photograph of Jane Fonda as Barbarella by Paul Joyce is to go on display." [Telegraph]
• Did you know that John Ratzenberger has been part of every Pixar release over the last 14 years? [USA Today]
• Jerry Springer razzle dazzled in his London debut playing the lawyer Billy Flynn in the hit musical Chicago. [Daily Mail]
• Blind item! "Which old-school pair of actor brothers constantly tag-team at parties, picking up the youngest girls they can find?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Don't call it 'civics' because 'civics' is easily the most boring word in America. Call it what it is: political power. I've got a very simple thing her. I've got a nonprofit initiative to get K-12 grades back to civics, to give our children real-world knowledge and hopefully wisdom about how to run this complex governance system. That's it. That's enough." — Richard Dreyfuss, on the The Dreyfuss Initiative. [AP]
• "He's a social butterfly, and loves being on tour. He loves it so much, he thinks it's absolutely hilarious to embarrass me as much as possible. For example, [I'm] walking into the hotel lobby after returning from dinner. It's a quiet, serene, beautiful when … Screaming voice from out of nowhere: 'HEY! THAT'S TAYLOR SWIFT!!' Me: 'Dad. Please stop doing that.'" — Taylor Swift. [People]
• "This season I made it like a sorority, the Paris sorority. It's about sisterhood, and they have to follow certain rules. In real life, you know, I'm not that superficial." — Paris Hilton, on the new season of My New BFF. [Mirror via E!]
• "I couldn't have given him kids - and anyway I want black kids, not white kids." — Amy Winehouse, on the news that her husband Blake is expecting a child with a blonde he met in rehab. [Daily Mail]
• "I stopped doing (romantic comedies). They are terrible; they are bad. They are not funny, so they shouldn't be a romantic comedy and most of the time they are not romantic. So they shouldn't be called a romantic comedy. They should be called that other kind of film. I'm not calling [The Proposal] a romantic comedy." — Sandra Bullock. [MSNBC]
• "Kanye West is the person pissing me off right now. The entire time Kanye is going, 'They need more fur in this show.' He just wouldn't shut up about how he loved fur. I mean, he's saying this to me, the PETA guy and Paul McCartney! I was just so grossed out by him. I'm like, 'You're an idiot!' There are so many people who I think are a waste of skin and he's up there. I should wear him." — Pink, to FHM Australia. [The Life Files]

• The Pennsylvania Department of Labor is investigating whether Jon and Kate Plus 8 is complying with child labor laws. A spokeswoman for the department says there was a complaint, but a TLC rep says: "TLC fully complies with all applicable laws and regulations..."

• "Jon & Kate Plus 8 is no exception. For an extended period of time, we have been engaged in cooperative discussions and supplied all requested information to the Pennsylvania Department of Labor. We will continue to engage the appropriate officials and meet any standards or regulations that are applicable to TLC productions." [TMZ]
• Star harassed Jon Gosselin's mother at her home in Pennsylvania. She said, "I don't think [Jon] will ever be portrayed fairly... It's always twisted." [Star]
• At a progress report hearing today, a judge said Redmond O'Neal is "responding well" to drug treatment. [The Daily Mail]
• Angelina Jolie was injured today on the set of Salt and taken to the hospital. She got a nick between her eyes and bled a bit but she will be fine. [TMZ]
• Angelina was only taken to the hospital as a precaution because she bumped her head and got a scratch. She's already resumed filming. [People]
• Britney Spears is being sued for running over photographer Rick Mendoza when she was pulling out of a parking lot in 2007. He says Brit's people, who are also defendants, "should have known...Britney was not in the mental, emotional and/or physical condition to operate the subject motor vehicle in a safe and reasonable manner." A video of the incident show Brit only ran over his foot after honking repeatedly as paparazzi circled her car. Plus, she gets upset and Mendoza says he's fine. [TMZ]
• Britney Spears filmed an ad for Logo's NewNowNext Awards that spoofs her perfume ads. In the ad for the fake fragrance she says, "Mo. One spray and the gays will run your way." Logo executive producer Christopher Willey says, "She's having fun with her gay audience, because she's an official gay icon." [Perez Hilton]
• Anna Wintour talked with Rihanna at the Met Gala and said she wanted her for the cover of Vogue. A source says, "Anna told her Vogue absolutely loves her and really wanted to work with her. Rihanna was ecstatic." But now that nude photos which may or may not be Rihanna have surface, Wintour won't return her calls. [ONTD]
• Eve has taken Tweeted an attack on Chris Brown. She says, "He's guilty until proven innocent, and no man should ever raise a hand to a woman. I'm so sick of people kissin' his ass." She added: "a clip of him saying he isnt a monster...yeh motherfucker u are. let him or any other man come to me with power fists..id fuck him up.." She wrote that Rihanna is "beautiful and talented" and deserves better. "finally,no we dont no wat happened that night, all i no, is seein rihannas beautiful face bruised and upset..thats enuff 4 me," she said. [Star]
• Karen Sala, a Canadian woman who claims to have known Keanu Reeves since childhood, says she wants him to provide DNA samples to prove he is the father of her children and pay $150,000 per month in child support, plus $3 million. By the way, the kids are 20 and 25 years old. [Perez Hilton]
• As mentioned in Midweek Madnesss, Spencer Pratt used to be called "the King of Weed," before he went to rehab for pot and prescription medication. He still dabbles, but he's lost his crown. [Star]
• Mel Gibson's pregnant girlfriend, Oksana Grigorieva, is suing a web hosting company that bought the site OksanaGrigorieva.com. She says they are cyber squatting and put false information up to make it look like her official site. [TMZ]
• You can watch the trailer for Toy Story 3 here: [Perez Hilton]
• Adam Lambert responded to Clay Aiken blogging that his voice makes his ears want to bleed. Lambert said: "I don't know Clay. I'm glad he's getting headlines now though, because he wasn't before. If he wants to ride my coattails about it, good for him." [Perez Hilton]
• On The View today when American Idol judge Kara DioGuardi was asked about Adam Lambert's sexuality, she said, I don't think that Adam was ever in [the closet]." [People]
• Roger Moore, who took over the role of James Bond after Sean Connery, said, "Looking at Sean, I realize how damn good he was. I can't believe I had the ego, when I took over, to think I could replace him." He says his Bond was lighter than Connery's because, "I couldn't be the tough Bond that Sean was." [Reuters]
• Candy Spelling wrote on the Huffington Post that reporters shouldn't have published headlines reading "Candy Spelling: Tori's Actions Killed My Husband Aaron Spelling," because all she actually said was Tori Spelling's abandonment cost Aaron Spelling his will to live. She writes, "I didn't intend to create headlines. I was asked a question about my daughter not speaking with my family, and I answered truthfully. My husband was very ill, and he had stopped eating and taking liquids. He called Tori on a daily basis, and never stopped asking if Tori had returned his call. We had to say no every day." [The Huffington Post]
• Kim Kardashian told The Sun: "I definitely want to get married again, that's the best part of life - finding that person you can be with forever and have a really good relationship with ... I've been through a marriage and divorce and I don't want to do that again, I'm definitely more cautious and I'll make sure I don't jump into anything too quickly this time." The paper thinks this is good news for British men because she also said she likes accents. Too bad she's already engaged. [The Sun]
• '80s rapper Tone Loc collapsed during a concert in Florida. He was complaining about the humidity earlier in the evening, and may have a history of seizures. [Perez Hilton]
• Chace Crawford's Gossip Girl costar Connor Paolo said he'll dance well in Footloose "Chace has got a lot of upper body stuff going on. He raises the roof a lot," said Paolo adding, "Come on, anything Chace does will work for him." [People]
• Blake Lively, whose Gossip Girl character lives in the penthouse of the Palace Hotel, says, "I don't know if I could live in a hotel. I need a kitchen because I love to cook, but I love the Palace Hotel so much! I had my 21st birthday here. It was a black tie formal, and I had it downstairs in the Madison Room. It's one of my favorite hotels in the city by far." [Observer]
• Though Liam Gallagher has always hated Blur, he said of their comeback, "I'm right into the Blur reunion, 'cos it'll finish off the Kaiser Chiefs and put them to bed...There's nothing worse than a s*** Blur. And at least the original s*** Blur are back to finish off all these other s*** Blurs." [The Sun]
• Christian Bale says his father is the driving force behind his career. "He was very adamant that the greatest thing to be fearful of in life was being boring and being bored," said Bale. [The Telegraph]
• Ozzy Osbourne is suing Black Sabbath bandmate Tony Iommi who claimed sole ownership of the band's name in a filing with the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office. Osbourne says 50 percent of the name and the profits are his. []
• British glamour model Katie Pierce walked the runway for the first time since her split with Peter Andre. She was modeling a neon pink cropped t-shirt and hotpants, which is part of her equestrian clothing line. [Mirror]
• Jane Fonda posted on her website about her 1970 mug shot photo. She writes that she had been on a college speaking tour protesting the Vietnam war, and when she was returning from a college in Canada, "at the Cleveland airport all my luggage was seized and gone through. They discovered a large bag containing little plastic envelopes marked (in red nail polish) ‘B', ‘L', ‘D'–signifying breakfast, lunch and dinner- that contained the vitamins I took with each meal. They confiscated that as well as my address book (which was photocopied) and arrested me for drug smuggling. I told them what they were but they said they were getting orders from the White House–that would be the Nixon White House. I think they hoped this "scandal" would cause the college speeches to be canceled and ruin my respectability. I was handcuffed and put in the Cleveland Jail, which is when the mug shot was taken. (I had just finished filming "Klute" so, yes, it was the Klute haircut)." [JaneFonda.com]
• Susan Boyle is staying at a "safe house" as she prepares for Saturday's Britain's Got Talent final because she is feeling too much media pressure. Judge Piers Morgan said, "She had a rocky moment a couple of days ago when she woke up and saw some very negative headlines and suddenly felt the pressure of world attention. You have to remember this is someone who has gone from complete anonymity to global stardom in the space of six weeks. It's understandable. People should give her a bit of slack. She's 24 hours from the biggest day of her life and she's starting to feel the heat." [BBC
• Edie Falco says starring in Showtime's Nurse Jackie is different than working on The Sopranos because, "My work stuff doesn't have the same intense desperation it used to have, and now that the desperation is gone, it's more about doing the work because I love to do it, not because it's the only thing that matters to me." As for the show's success, she says, "If people respond, great. If not, onto the next thing. I'd be sad, but that's life." [Newsweek]
• Apparently Fergie sent Alanis Morrisette a butt-shaped cake after she did a cover of "My Humps." Newsweek wants to know if Alanis ate it. She says: "I had every intention of eating it, but then I had this party at my house and all my friends were putting their fingers between the cheeks, taking pictures with it. So after everyone had touched it, the butt wasn't very sanitary." [Newsweek]
• Kanye West writes on his blog that the version of his video for Paranoid that leaked to the internet isn't the final cut. He says, "IT HURTS ME TO SEE THE OLD AND VERY WRONG VERSION OF THE PARANOID VIDEO GET LEAKED ALL OVER THE NET WHILE I WAS ON AN 11 HR FLIGHT AND COULDN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT. IT'S JUST FRUSTRATING WHEN THIS STUFF HAPPENS BECAUSE I REALLY CARE ABOUT THE PRODUCT AND SINCE VIDEOS NEVER GET PLAYED ANY WAY YOU MIGHT AS WELL TWEAK THEM AND MAKE THEM AS SPECIAL AS POSSIBLE. THE VERSION THAT GOT LEAKED FROM THE CAMERA PHONE LAST WEEK IS AT LEAST A LITTLE CLOSER TO THE FINAL PRODUCT. THANK YOU EVERYBODY FOR YOUR SUPPORT BUT THAT VIDEO WAS NOT UP TO MY STANDARDS." [Perez Hilton]

[New York, May 19. Image via INF]

Earlier: • Comic Confrontations: Judge Judy Vs. Michele Bachmann
Comic Confrontations: Judge Judy Vs. Perez Hilton
•Comic Confrontations: Judge Judy Vs. The Real Housewives Of New York
•Comic Confrontations: Judge Judy Vs. Kathy Griffin
•Comic Confrontations: Judge Judy Vs. Sarah Palin
•Comic Confrontations: Judge Judy Vs. Amy Winehouse
•Conceptual Confrontations: Judge Judy Vs. Latarian Milton
•Comic Confrontations: Judge Judy Vs. Crazy Hillary Supporters

• Too bad you missed Britney's Tampa concert: At the end of one number, she announced, "My pussy's hanging out." Why, yes, there is video. [TMZ]

• Britney's dad fired three dancers from her tour for suspected drug use. Keepin' it clean! [Daily Mail]
• WTF. Madonna dressed as a naughty schoolgirl for Purim? She seems to be wearing Lourdes' clothes. [The Sun]
• Madonna and Jesus Luz's mom are both bleach blondes who wear skimpy tops? [Gatecrasher]
• Miley Cyrus has tachycardia: her heart rate exceeds the range of a normal resting heart rate. She writes in her autobiography: "The type of tachycardia I have isn't dangerous. It won't hurt me, but it does bother me. There is never a time onstage when I'm not thinking about my heart." [Gatecrasher]
• Little Jakey Gyllenhaal looks like a brawny hunk in this picture from The Prince Of Persia. [The Life Files]
• So you know how Usher slammed Chris Brown, and then apologized for his comments? An insider says he was "forced" to do so. [Gatecrasher]
• This piece is about why couples reunite. It begins, "No one - not Oprah, not anyone - can figure out why Rihanna decided to get back together with an allegedly abusive Chris Brown." [NY Post]
• Usually we're talking about which team David Beckham is going to play for; this story is about which team he would like to own. "I have the right to own an MLS franchise, which I will action immediately after I have stopped playing," Beckham says. You also need about $40 million and a stadium. [BBC News]
• If you watched Dancing With The Stars last night you know that replacing Jewel and Nancy O'Dell, who were sidelined by injuries, are Holly Madison and Melissa Rycroft — the latter really stretching the definition of the word "star." She was dumped on The Bachelor. [AP]
• This story begins, "Should Dancing With the Stars be renamed Dancing With People You Might Have Heard Of? [MSNBC Scoop]
• Nadya Suleman, mother of 14, has a new house. Her father bought her a four-bedroom, three-bath place in Orange County, CA; the money probably came from the donations and from TV shows who pay her for interviews. Elizabeth Snead of the LA Times writes: "Tell us how you feel about this freaky freeloader — on food stamps, disability and lord knows what else — getting a new home when so many honest, hard-working people in the country are losing theirs." [LA Times]
• Whoa, Real Housewife of New York Kelly Killoren Bensimon was arrested for assault! Her boyfriend, Nicholas Stefanov, told cops she punched him… [NY Daily News]
• Gretchen Rossi of Real Housewives of Orange County denies cheating on her late fiancé. But what's this about calling some dude her boyfriend in a 911 call? [People]
• Uh-oh: TMZ is getting more involved in celebrities' lives: They saved Andy Dick from getting arrested. [TMZ]
• Lawyers for the late Anna Nicole Smith are asking the Supreme Court for help — the money dispute involving her dead husband and his dead son is crazy complicated. Everyone has passed away but the legal issues live on! [AP]
• Gossip Girl's Leighton Meester may star in a thriller called The Roommate. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Rebecca Romijn will star in Eastwick, the new ABC pilot based on John Updike's The Witches Of Eastwick. She'll be the blonde one? [Variety]
• Marcia Cross probably won't be on the new Melrose Place, even though that would be awesome. She says: "I'm really busy. I say never say never, but it's not the first thing on my mind." [Mirror]
• Anil Kapoor of Slumdog Millionaire will be on Fox TV show 24! [Hindustan Times]
• U2 used to be all over Apple products, but their new album has a partnership with Blackberry. What does it mean??? [AdAge]
• If you want to see Mel B modeling underwear — as she "prepares" for her Vegas burlesque show — click the link at the end of this sentence. The white corset is nice. [Daily Mail]
• Roger Friedman says Jane Fonda is "fantastic" in the Broadway play 33 Variations. OMG Dolly Parton was in the audience??? [Fox 411]
• Michael J. Fox is doing a special for ABC about optimism. [AP]
• Here's an interview with the chiseled Irishman Cillian Murphy. [MetroMix]
• The dude accused of stalking Saturday Night Live producer Lorne Michaels is a free man as his case was adjourned for six months. [USA Today, NY Daily News]
• Mischa Barton's been blogging about breaking up with the guy from the Kooks, yawn. [Perez]
• Anne Heche is officially single again, if you care. [E!]
• This picture of Reno 911's Niecy Nash celebrating her 39th birthday is awesomesauce. [Concrete Loop]
• Headline of the day: "Police Seize More Than $1 Million In Drugs From Phish Fans." [USA Today]
• Holy-crap blind item! "Which top model's plastic surgeon is in big trouble? He accidentally spilled acid on her chest while they were having sex in his office." [Gatecrasher]
• "Back up! Don't you ever touch me! You all make my life miserable." — Hayden Panettiere, to photographers and reporters on the red carpet at a hospital fundraising event. [MSNBC]
• "I have to brush my teeth before I go on stage, otherwise I don't feel smart enough." — Chris Martin. [The Sun]
• "I'm a very spiritual person and he's come to me many of times in my dreams… at the end of the day, he knows who's who and what's what. Believe that. And let me tell you something, the way he's feeling is going to come out. Like, trust me. Everything is going to come out later. You're going to see who he really loved and the ones that's standing up for him the right way is the ones representing him the right way. I'm going to tell you what my spiritual connection from Biggie is telling me, 'Don't look back, just do you' and that's why my success is right here for me… Biggie said 'Don't look back. Forget Cease, forget all of them because they going to be sorry. Cause what they did was wrong.'" — Lil Kim, who says the late Notorious B.I.G speaks to her from beyond the grave. [Perez]
• "I'm here and I'm doing it now and I'm working as hard as anybody. Life took me in a different direction, but I'm not here as a lark and I'm not whizzing in and stopping by for two weeks. I've done all kind of things in my career, but this feels like a big deal. Broadway has a mythic greatness — and an actual greatness. No one wanted me to be gone for a year and be unavailable for movies and stuff. They're right. It's a chunk of time. But I have learned from other times, mostly in terms of travel, when I said 'Oh, I'll do it next time.' There were many trips that I had a chance to take, and I'd say 'there's too much going on right now; I'm not going to do it' — and then I've never done it. Guys and Dolls felt like one of those things. In order to survive I will need to have a steady job again, like a television show, and so I don't know when this time will come again. But I fell in love with the play and I fell in love with the part. I thought it was a risk worth taking." — Lauren Graham, of Gilmore Girls, on her new stint as Adelaide in Guys and Dolls on Broadway. [WSJ]