It's Ripley! And looking absolutely action-hero splendid.


Speaking of ass-kicking chic, check out Jamie Lee Curtis' sleek LBD - and gorgeous silver crop!


Zoe Saldana manages to look stunning in a futuristic scrap-metal majorette's uniform, which is saying a lot.


Virginia Madsen's classic LBD is ready for a mid-century holiday party, complete with Tom & Jerrys.


Michelle Rodriguez is a vision in fuschia: the contrast with undone hair keeps it casual.


I might have been tempted to not put a spotlight directly on my bosom, but Cheryl Tiegs knows what she wants.


Everyone's favorite Rorshach couple, the DeVito-Perlmans.


Audrina Patridge is identified as an "actress" here. I don't know about that, but I do know that this "suit" looks ridiculous.


Leona Lewis is thisclose to a "happy birthday, Mr. President" moment.


CCH Pounder takes "drapery" to a whole new level. Even Rami bows his head in shame before its sheer scope.

[Images via Getty]

• At a concert on Sunday Marilyn Manson blew phlegm from his nose all over the stage (there's video). The next day he wrote on Facebook: "So I have officially been diagnosed, by a real doctor, with THE SWINE FLU..."

• He continued, "I know everyone will suggest that fucking a pig is how this disease was obtained. However, the doctor said, my past choices in women have in 'no way' contributed to me acquiring this mysterious sickness. ... Unfortunately, I am going to survive." [TMZ, UPI]
• The Sun has admitted Lily Allen didn't insult the Beckhams, and paid her $16,000. The paper printed an apology, saying, "We now accept that Lily didn't say these things to the magazine and we apologize to Lily for the upset and embarrassment caused by repeating them." The incorrect quote was taken from a French magazine called SoFoot. [E!]
• Though Lily Allen told fans she has no plans to make another record, her spokesman is reassuring fans that she's not retiring from music. He said: "Lily is not retiring from music. She is still promoting her current album which is why she said she is not thinking about her next record right now." [The Mirror]
• People has seen a videotape of John Travolta's lawyer and the two Bahamian defendants accused of trying to extort money from him. The men asked for money for a document called a Do No Transport form Travolta signed when considering whether to have his son taken to the airport or the nearest hospital. Travolta's lawyer asks, "Where the hell did you get a number of 25 million bucks?" [People]
• After Randy and Evi Quaid were arrested yesterday for skipping out on a hotel bill they sent in a $5,546 check — about $5,000 less than they owe. [TMZ]
• Deputy James Davis, the police officer who arrested Evi Quaid, says she showed up to his office today and screamed at him, accusing him of being "a crooked, corrupt cop" who concocted "a plot against her and her husband." He described it as a "psychotic episode." [TMZ]
• The Quaids have been formally charged with felony burglary, conspiracy and defrauding an innkeeper. The Santa Barbara D.A. said, "They're going to need to come to Santa Barbara and deal with these charges. Any restitution that's been paid will help facilitate a resolution of the criminal case, but that doesn't mean it will automatically go away." [TMZ]
• Last night Angelina Jolieand Brad Pitt went to the dedication of the Jane Pitt Pediatric Cancer Center in his hometown of Springfield, Mo., which was named after his mom and financed by a $1 million donation from Pitt. [Star]
• In a statement read on today's Oprah, Bijou Phillips said she was 13 when she learned that her half-sister Mackenzie Phillips had sex with her father. She is now 29 and says the information was confusing and scary and it was "heartbreaking" that her family still left her alone with her father. [AP]
• For some unknown reason, Vivica A. Fox was asked about Mackenzie Phillips' revelation that she had sex with her father. She said: "The fact that her father is not here to defend himself, I don't like it. I don't think that's fair." Yes, clearly it's Mackenzie who needs to be worried about being fair! [Radar Online]
• Vincent D'Onofrio, Kathryn Erbe and Eric Bogosian will be phased out of Law and Order: Criminal Intent this season and Jeff Goldblum will take over as the lead detective. [Reuters]
• Martha Stewart apologized for making insensitive comments about Jessica Simpson losing her dog on her TV show today. "I said that she should have been watching her dog more closely, but I feel very, very sorry for anybody that loses a pet," said Martha. "Jessica, I hope you find your pet, but if you don't, I'm really sorry that you lost one." [People]
• Blind item: Which "on-screen duo" doesn't get along in real life?" Michael Ausiello writes: he "claims his leading lady is unprofessional and extremely difficult to work with. Even worse, he has accused her of behaving 'inappropriately' at times. He's made it known to TPTB that he doesn't want to be in scenes with her, least of all love scenes. But there's no getting around those anytime soon. 'They told him the love scenes are unavoidable,' says my spy. 'Their characters are supposed to be having a torrid affair.'" [Entertainment Weekly]
• This week's episode of Jon and Kate Plus 8 was the lowest rated ever, drawing in only 1.7 million viewers. Their high was the divorce episode, which had 10.6 million viewers. [Radar Online]
• Elizabeth Hurley's husband, Arun Nayar, was badly burned on his face and right hand while lighting a bonfire at his home. He said, "I had an accident, but I am recovering well now." [The Telegraph]
• Justin Guarini is getting married this weekend to Reina Capodici, with whom he has a four-year-old daughter. His friend and publicist said, "This is the happiest I've ever seen him. He's smiling from ear to ear. I don't know what's bigger – his teeth or his hair." [People]
• Jaime Pressly is marrying Simran Singh on Saturday. They announced their engagement in July. [Radar Online]
• Isabella Rossellini, who starred in the experimental online Green Porno films says, "The web is a double-edged sword," she said, speaking in Italian. "It has a huge potential for distributing content, creating contacts. There are a lot of advantages. The problem is that money is spent on technologies, not on content." [Reuters]
• Gisele Bunchen says she and Tom Brady decided not to find out the sex of their baby. "We will only know when it is born, in December," she said. "I want the emotion of finding out then if it is a boy or a girl." [People]
• Jamie Lee Curtis criticized paparazzi for creating a "hostile environment for celebrities" and rushed past photographers at Variety's Power of Women Luncheon. She explained: "My knees happen to have some bruises on them because I just did a stunt where I was under a sink on my hands and knees with exploding water in my face. I had very bruised knees and I worried they would focus on that and make some bad story about why my knees are bruised!" [The Mirror]
• Hugh Hefner says he wants Megan Fox to pose for Playboy explaining, "Megan is a fox." However his new girlfriends want Kelly Osbourne to pose. "She's losing weight and she's blond now," Crystal Harris says. "She looks good. I want to see what she looks like naked." [E!]

January Jones' curious LBD borders on the "backwards" - but she looks amazing!


I'm not sure what trend in trousers Jane Lynch is demonstrating. In fact, I'm not sure it's a trend at all.


Jane Kaczmarek's palm beachy situation screams "luncheon." Take that as you will.


Maria Bello's white-suit-sandals combo is a tad "beach wedding" for my tastes, but one can't deny her insouciance.


I adore Shannyn Sossamon's Miss Mix-worthy openwork waist and skirt. And anyone who knows what I'm referring to, I officially call my sister.


Jamie Lee Curtis does simple, classic, sexy, as she does so well.


Silk charmeuse, as Wendy Davis demonstrates, is apparently the new LBD. Except that it's not basic. Or especially versatile. People just wear it constantly.


Gotta give Anne Hathaway this: when the girl's on, she's really on. Plus she can wear saffron, which is quite a trick.


I guess having said that, I need to give Sherry Lansing props for sporting an entire field of pumpkin. Well, points for...boldness, certainly. She said kindly.


Camryn Manheim's loose-fitting horizontals are not what anyone would call flattering, and are what some would call frumpy, but a natural red-carpet smile earns major points.


Christina Aguilera takes the basic out of "little black dress" even as she emphasizes the "little."


After a bizarre Emmy showing, Olivia Wilde goes safely demure.


AnnaLynne McCord rides the metallic train - and it's kinda disco-fab.


This retro-pretty day dress is an amazing look for Christina Applegate.


Seriously, what would a "Power of Women" event be without noted women's advocate Terrence Howard in a pair of clashing shoes?

[Images via Getty]

Jennifer's Body is written by a woman (Diablo Cody), directed by a woman (Karyn Kusama, of Girlfight fame) and stars a woman: Megan Fox.

But women are often the victims in horror flicks: As Michelle Orange writes for the Times:

Long before the first big-screen vivisection of a female breast, the novelist H. P. Lovecraft wrote that horror was "supposed to be against the world, against life, against civilization." But the delight that the genre's filmmakers, especially those behind the Saw franchise and its torture porn kin, take in depicting a steady stream of starlets being strung up, nailed down or splayed open, makes it clear that modern horror is against some more than others.

And the fact is: Research shows that women love horror movies. Debbie Liebling, the former president for production at Fox Atomic, a studio for low-budget, teen-oriented genre films like Turistas, doesn't get it: "I'm not sure what the attraction is, psychologically, for females," she says. "I would love to know why girls are going to see Saw, because I have no idea." Diablo Cody has an answer: "Some of us just like that stuff," she explains. "We like suspense, we like to be scared, we like to have visceral reaction in the theater. Maybe I'm starved for adrenaline, but for me watching a horror movie is very pleasurable. So making one was kind of a dream."

As a woman who digs a good horror flick, I'll agree it's about the thrill. You go for the same reason you ride a roller coaster: It's a rush, to jump in your seat, to be scared, to feel your heart pound. And if the flicks don't exploit women? Even better. Orange points out that Cody and Kusama attempt to keep everyone happy:

Jennifer's Body was designed with both feminists and 15-year-old boys in mind, a seemingly eccentric blueprint that, as Ms. Kusama points out, is in line with the best movies of the slasher tradition. "It may be one of the best ways for a young male audience to experience a female story without feeling like they have been limited by a female perspective," she said. […] Between Needy's cautious yearning and Jennifer's pure, trampling id, the film presents a portrait of female identity in flux.

It was an effort that often bedeviled Ms. Cody and Ms. Kusama, who tried to balance brute violence and lesbian kisses with the film's more substantial metaphors. "The tricky thing is if you're going to subvert those tropes, they have to be there," said Ms. Cody, whose script is a self-described "crazy, chaotic homage" to the horror films of her youth. "We were constantly bobbing and weaving. Karyn and I talk about the film as a kind of Trojan horse. We wanted to package our beliefs in a way that's appealing to a mainstream audience."

Women are a big part of the fan base, so it makes sense to make movies with strong female characters. Instead of screaming chicks a la Janet Leigh in Psycho: we need more of the "final girl," the one who makes it, or uses her strength and wits to survive. (Jamie Lee Curtis in Halloween?)

As Diablo Cody expains about her love of horror: "When I watched movies like The Goonies and E.T., it was boys having adventures. When I watched Nightmare on Elm Street, it was Nancy beating" up Freddy. "It was that simple."

Taking Back The Knife: Girls Gone Gory [NY Times]

• "Sources" say Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick have decided to live apart just weeks after the birth of their twin daughters. Matthew will stay in their Manhattan apartment and Sarah Jessica will move to Brooklyn with the kids.

• A friend says: "Sarah clearly loves Manhattan but she has three children now. It might be better for them to grow up somewhere calmer. But Matthew loves their townhouse in Manhattan because it's close to his work on Broadway." The story doesn't address what impact these new living arrangements will have on their marital status. [ONTD]
• D.E.A. agents raided Dr. Conrad Murray's Houston office today looking for Michael Jackson's medical records. Last night Murray's lawyer issued a statement on his website saying, "The coroner wants to clear up the cause of death; we share that goal. Based on Dr. Murray's minute-by-minute and item-by-item description of Michael Jackson's last days, he should not be a target of criminal charges." [TMZ]
• Dr. Conrad Murray's lawyer issued another statement after the raid saying law enforcement officials were looking for evidence "of the offense of manslaughter," adding, "Law enforcement concluded their search around 12:30pm, and left with a forensic image of a business computer hard drive and 21 documents. None of the documents taken had previously been requested by law enforcement or the L.A. Coroner's office." [TMZ]
• Director and producer Bryan Michael Stoller, who was friends with Michael Jackson, says, "Michael really wanted to be a filmmaker and direct a feature film." Jackson also had Stoller tutor his children on filmmaking at Neverland Ranch. "He'd set up a makeshift classroom, and he wanted me to mentor the kids on filmmaking," said Stoller. "We were talking about how animation was done, scripts, screenplays. He was totally into that." [E!]
• Michael Jackson's friend, Fame choreographer Debbie Allen says she thinks he should be buried at Neverland. "I really wish he could be there," she said, "Michael just loved being there. It was his fantasy come true." [E!]
• As mentioned in Midweek Madness, Star claims Blanket Jackson's mother is a woman named Pia Bhatti. She met MJ in a hotel lobby when her then 12-year-old son Omer did a moonwalk for him. MJ and Omer became friends and was seated three seats from Blanket at the funeral. [Star]
• Rupert Everett says it's good Michael Jackson died because he wouldn't have made it through his London concerts and the press would have destroyed him. "I think it was fortuitous that he died,' he said.'‘He was a freak. He looked like a character from Shrek. He was a black to white minstrel... He was crucified by that court case when he was accused of child molestation – that killed him... He personified the pain and anxiety of a black man in a slave country. We all watched as he changed from black to white. He was living performance art." [The Daily Mail]
• Jamie Lee Curtis wrote in an article on The Huffington Post today revealing that like Michael Jackson, she was addicted to pain killers. "I too found painkillers after a routine cosmetic surgical procedure and I too became addicted," she writes, "The morphine becomes the warm bath from which to escape painful reality. I was a lucky one. I was able to see that the pain had started long ago and far away and that the finding the narcotic was merely a matter of time." She calls her recovery "the greatest single accomplishment of my life." [People]
• Mischa Barton has left Cedars-Sinai Medical Center and her rep says she's "making improvements," but is "still seeking treatment." She plans to return to work on her new show The Beautiful Life. [People]
• Jay-Z denied the rumor that he had Chris Brown kicked out of the BET Awards on a radio show saying, "That's the silliest rumor I ever heard … I was really sitting back and just watching all these suckers comment. Let me categorically deny that - that's not even my style. If I have a problem with Chris Brown, I have a problem with Chris Brown. I haven't said anything … I don't agree with what he did, and that's it. That's it. That's the end of it." [N.Y. Magazine]
• The rumor that Patrick Swayze suffered a heart attack isn't true either, according to his publicist who said, "He's continuing his treatment and doing very well, actually. Contrary to reports, he did not suffer a heart attack and has even gained a little weight." [Access Hollywood]
• Liam Gallagher was in a "bad mood" as he walked onstage last night, probably because someone in the audience threw a water bottle at him. When other people started throwing their beers at him he yelled, "Is that some fucking shitbag who's throwing fucking lager, can't handle a soft a**e from fuckingg Camden town? Well get on this fuckingg student." [The Mirror]
• Sienna Miller freaked out on Australian morning when a DJ brought up Balthazar Getty. You can take a listen here: [TMZ]
• Ryan Seacrest, who earns about $15 million a year from American Idol has offered to buy Paula Abdul lunch every day if she agrees to come back. [TMZ]
• TV Guide bought the offnet rights to Ugly Betty, which means new episodes will run two weeks after their TV premiere on TV Guide Network, and reruns going back to season one will air in primetime. [Variety]
• What has pregnancy done to Kendra Wilkinson? She took down her stripper pole because of the baby and when asked if she's worried about gaining weight she said, "I'm concentrating more on what's healthy for the baby more than my weight gain... I know my weight gain will go away very fast, so if I gain weight and that's what it takes to make my baby healthy, that's what has to happen." [E!]
• The CW has posted promos for the remake of Melrose Place, which stars Ashlee Simpson-Wentz as a small town girl who moves to L.A. and has a "disarming disarming naiveté [that] masks the calculating, shrewd sex kitten within." Check out the clip here: [People]
• Last night Whitney Houston previewed her upcoming CD to an industry audience and said her daughter Bobbi Kristina helped her while she was working on the album. "She was with me every step of the way: `Mom, you can do this.' When I get discouraged and I get like, `This is tiring, this is wearing me out, I'm just not at that point,' she'd just go, `No, mom, you can do this, get up, get up,'" Houston said. "She encourages me and inspires me, when I look at her and I look at her eyes and I see myself, I go, `OK, I can do this. I can do this.'" [Yahoo]
• Patti Stanger of The Millionaire Matchmaker is engaged to real estate executive Andy Friedman. "I feel like it should have happened years ago, so I'm kind of shocked," she said. [Us]
• Jennifer Lopez, whose twins are just starting to talk, says, "I would love to have more kids... I don't know if we will. I don't know if that's in the cards for us – but we'll see." [People]
• When asked if he believes in God or is spiritual, Brad Pitt said, "No, no, no! I'm probably 20 per cent atheist and 80 per cent agnostic. I don't think anyone really knows. You'll either find out or not when you get there, until then there's no point thinking about it." [Bild]
• "It feels like that stuff is behind me. Time is going by and it feels like I'm going to be all right...So now maybe I don't even know the kind of career I wanna have. But it's pretty cool that I get to figure that out. I was a child actor, which is not something that I'm proud of-aside from the fact that I'm on Pee-Wee's Playhouse, which I'm proud of. But obviously it wasn't like that was a choice. It wasn't like that was my career move as a six-year old. "Oh, I wanna be in show business!" I wasn't fucking Shirley Temple. And I doubt that she wanted to be. So that by sixteen when I was cast in this Woody Allen movie, right after that I was really angry that I wasn't given the choice to go to college and be a philosophy major. I never had time to figure out what I wanted to do with this life. I just bumbled along from one job to the next. It was really great, a lot of it. But I don't think I understood that I had a choice. So it's really good that I got take a self-imposed break and now I get to do it from a place of choice." — Natasha Lyonne [Gothamist]

• Lindsay Lohan a liar? In the latest issue of Nylon, LL says she's hoping to work with Seth Rogen but "Seth won't call us back." Rogen says:

"That's not true — I never got a call from anyone that works for her." [The Star]

• More Lindsay Lohan drama: A source says she "is spending like crazy" and is living on credit right now. And most of the cash she spends? It's Samantha's. [Gatecrasher]
• Sad face! Agyness Deyn and Albert Hammond Jr. broke up. [NY Mag]
• Has Madonna dumped Jesus Luz? [Just Jared]
• This report says Jesus recently said: "Madonna has an amazing body, is a sexy, kind person and a great mother. The difference in our ages means nothing. She looks like a 30-year-old and has a youthful personality to go with it. I love her and nothing else matters." Which sounds like they are not broken up. [PopDirt]
• By the by, Madonna's nanny gave notice, then her Madgesty told her to leave, immediately. [Daily Mail]
• This paper claims that Guy Ritchie has a black eye, but the photographic evidence is sketchy. [The Sun]
• Jade Goody, dental assistant turned reality-TV star, died Sunday at the age of 27. [AP, NY Times]
• The Jade Goody farewell will be planned by her family. [Mirror]
• Jade Goody leaves behind £4 million for her sons. [Telegraph]
• Amy Winehouse's label isn't thrilled with her new music; they were expecting her "trademark vintage soul" sound and she is now "heavily influenced by reggae," naturally. [The Sun]
• "Bruce Willis Ties Knot With Underwear Model" means he married a woman who has posed for Victoria's Secret. The ceremony took place at Parrot Bay in the Turks & Caicos. [Breitbart, Yahoo via AP]
• Demi Moore, Ashton Kutcher and Rumer, Scout and Tallulah attended the wedding. [Star]
• Yes, Ashton Kutcher Twittered a picture of Demi Moore's ass — taken while she was steaming his suit (maybe for the wedding?) Yes, she knew about it. No, I don't know why people are so interested. Like they have never seen a woman bending over before. [Defamer]
• Michael Jackson wants to adopt a kid. No comment. [Gatecrasher]
• Harrison Ford and Calista Flockhart are engaged; he decided to put a ring on it. [NY Post, Daily Mail]
• Katie Holmes "played babysitter" for Cruz and Romeo Beckham, taking them — and Suri — out around L.A. over the weekend. [Daily Mail]
• A wake was held for Natasha Richardson on Saturday in Manhattan. [Star]
• Natasha Richardson's funeral was held late Sunday afternoon in upstate New York. [E!, USA Today]
• Another picture from the forthcoming Where The Wild Things Are flick can be found here. Guess what? The kid who plays Max is named Max. [USA Today]
• Winnie Cooper is married, you guys. Danica McKellar got hitched in La Jolla, CA this weekend. [ET]
• Here's everything you want to know about Annie Leibovitz's money troubles — which may have nothing to do with same-sex marriage after all. [Page Six]
• Whoa: Katy Perry is dating Josh Groban? I kissed a (singer who makes people want to) hurl! [Perez]
• Honestly, it is sort of shocking that Knowing topped the box office, with $6 million more than I Love You, Man, since there were no early reviews and Nicolas Cage did zero publicity and Paul Rudd worked overtime. But Knowing is PG-13 and ILYM is rated R, so maybe families went to see Cage? [Breitbart]
• Like House? Like spoilers? This link pretty much tells you who is going to die. [NY Mag]
• Remember that Jennifer Aniston movie, The Baster? This casting call is looking for a "heavy set woman" and a "woman with a round face, small eyes, and upturned nose" to have profanities shouted at them in a scene. Fun? [TMZ]
• Johnny Depp topped a list of stars people would most like to share a candlelit dinner with. [The Star]
• Prince Harry will have lunch with the soldier he called a racial slur. [Telegraph]
• Are you ready for this image-shattering picture of 18-year-old Emma Roberts in the new GQ — in which she is wearing a tanktop and no bra? [Just Jared]
• Hilary Duff is back on TV: First she landed a guest spot on Ghost Whisperer; now she's gonna be on Law & Order: SVU. [E!]
• Speaking of L&O, Mariska Hargitay is headed back to work after a three-week absence. [People]
• Justin Guarini says American Idol sorta sucks: "Every single year, we cannot stand the group performances. I know they can't stand it either. And I think what makes [the group performances] even worse now is that they're lip-synced. They're really prerecorded now." [E!]
• Metallica went on stage at South By Southwest, telling the audience they were a "young band from Norway." Are they still in therapy? [USA Today]
• Kanye West closed SXSW, saying "It feels so good to rock for you tonight." [AP]
• We heard Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green broke up; then we heard they were back together, now we're hearing that she has moved out and is staying in a hotel. Ah, l'amour. [E!]
• Congrats to Natasha Bedingfield, who got hitched in Malibu on Saturday. [E!]
• After the success of that video which is an internet hit, Ricky Gervais and Elmo are working on a show together! [The Sun]
• Flavor Flav turned 50 over the weekend?!?!?! [Hollywood Rag]
• John Mellencamp blogged about the record business for HuffPo. [Huffington Post]
• Jamie Lee Curtis blogged about the "Recession Diet." [HuffPo]
• M.I.A. will play Coachella on April 18. [NY Times]
• "John Cleese halves payout for ex-wife to £650,000 in first celebrity credit crunch divorce." [Daily Mail]
• Blind item! "Which closeted TV icon enjoys "watersports" in his bedroom? His steady stream of gentleman callers are a little grossed out by it." [Gatecrasher]
• "I love writing for Dwight because he has one of the richest back stories of any of the characters. He is a farmer who is part Amish, who has war criminal relatives and who was involved in a secret love triangle — and has a nine-bedroom, possibly haunted hotel-farm. He has such a colorful past, and Rainn [Wilson] is such a gifted actor that it's like a great treasure map writing for his character… I think the Kelly character is fun to play because she's not a role model for anybody. Although I do sometimes believe my parents wish I played a cardiologist at Johns Hopkins." — Mindy Kaling, of The Office. [Washington Post]
• "To say that they like this movie would be like the crazy understatement of the world, 'cause they are crazy about it. They carry the characters around; they play in the morning with their action figures, so this is a really great experience to make a film for my kids that they love. There's not that many movies that have female superheroes in them so this was a great opportunity to not only be telling a great story of female empowerment but also create this awesome character." — Reese Witherspoon, on Monsters Vs. Aliens. [The Sun]
• "I'd probably have head-butted her new boyfriend, put her over my shoulder and run off." — Pete Doherty, on what he'd have done if he'd seen Kate Moss at his record label. [The Sun]
• "A few people have gone overboard. We have people come in to spray them. But there's a little Oompa-Loompa going on this season. It's not for me. I'm holding to the middle-age pasty-white-guy look." — Tom Bergeron, on the orange-ness on the contestants on Dancing With The Stars. [E!]
• "I love doing photo shoots. I mean, if I could just sign with IMG and do ad campaigns and model more, I'd do that… because that's fun for me. That's not work." — Lindsay Lohan, to Nylon. [Page Six]
• "A size zero? I've never heard of that. That didn't exist when I was growing up. When did that start? What does it mean?" — Heidi Klum. [Socialite Life]

But as the decades wore on, the magazine became less and less about America and more and more a celebrity-oriented publication; hence this star-filled edition of "The Way We Were: The '80s" (Previously:the '70s, the 60s, the '50s, '40s and the '30s.) In addition, we found very few Life covers from the '80s, though we did find covers of sister publication Time, so we threw those in. You do what you can!

And now: The 1980s.

Women riding exercise bikes at Krylatskoya Physical Fitness Clinic. Moscow, 1989.

Spin class 1.0! Why are there no shoes here? No Reeboks behind the iron curtain?

Actresses Beatrice Arthur, Estelle Getty, Rue McLanahan and Betty White of television series "The Golden Girls." 1986.

LOL at Bea Arthur's face. She is NOT amused.

Fashion designer Diane von Furstenberg w. fashion designer Calvin Klein & his wife, Kelly at the Don't Bungle the Jungle rain forest benefit concert at Brooklyn Academy of Music. May 1989.

These were the days. Diane von Furstenberg wasn't wearing a wrap dress and Calvin Klein was married to a woman.

Astronaut Sally Ride, first American woman in space, zipped up in "sleep restraint" during flight aboard Space Shuttle Challenger II (STS-7). June 1983.

Creepy but cool.

Comedienne Joan Rivers, in a denim jacket, with her dog Spike at a press conference to announce that she is the new "No Excuses" jeans girl. New York, 1988.

Acid wash denim jacket FTW.

TIME cover 01/05/1987: Corazon Aquino, TIME's Woman of the Year.

Not to be confused with Imelda Marcos.

Drew Barrymore and Mr. T, 1984.

I want this framed. Not even joking. the only thing that would be better would be this.

Madonna, 1984.

*cough*oldnose*cough*

Cyndi Lauper, 1986.

What shall we call this hue of hair? Lemon? Goldenrod? Taxicab?

Patti Labelle, 1986.

Yes. Thank you.

TV talk show host/actress Oprah Winfrey w. her boyfriend, Stedman Graham, chatting w. black leader Rev. Jesse Jackson at Tyson/Spinks pre-fight party at the Trump Plaza hotel. Atlantic City, 1988.

Oprah is saying, "I'm not as think as you drunk I am!"

k.d. lang w. actress Liza Minnelli at a party to celebrate lang's concert. New York, 1989.

Awesome.

Model Jerry Hall w. models wearing bathing suits she designed, at unveiling of her swim wear line. New York, 1988.

Only in the '80s would you unveil your swimsuits on models wearing ballet flats and long scarves.

TIME cover 02/09/1981 featuring model/actress Brooke Shields.

At the time, these eyebrows made a statement.

Model Cheryl Tiegs playing tennis at unident. location. 1982.

Those pink shorts are adorbs.

Model Beverly Johnson, wearing black dress and red hat . and singer Grace Jones, wearing green fur jacket and hat w. sunglasses. 1988.

Aren't you just dying to go wherever they're are going?

Lucia Ahn sitting at the piano with her sister Angela Ahn who is holding a violin at the student concert hall. Aspen, 1987

Asian people! This is from a story called "Whiz Kids."

Actresses Jackee Harry and Marla Gibbs w. track and field athlete Florence Griffith Joyner.

Wow. Just… wow!

Actress Jean Kasem, wearing unusual purple floral outfit. 1988

'80s red carpet: Not boring.

Girls sitting around table in class in School No. 32. Moscow, 1989.

So curious as to what these ladies are doing now.

TIME Cover: 12/09/1985 on Teenage Pregnancy. Photo Credit: Duane Michals.

Every decade: The same cover!

Actors Woody Allen and Mia Farrow w. her adopted daughter Soon-Yi leaving Farrow's apartment to see Liza Minnelli at Carnegie Hall. 1987.

Sigh. We all know how this ended up.

Comedienne Phyllis Diller on the beach. 1981.

What? Where? Why?

Actresses Danielle Brisebois and Jamie Lee Curtis, both wearing bathing suits. 1983.

Who is that little girl behind Jamie Lee Curtis? And is she thinking, "Why is she wearing pantyhose?"

Actress Morgan Fairchild wearing pink dress, reflected by mirror.

Big hair? Check! Off-the-shoulder neckline? Check! Intense pink hue? Check! Giant ruffle? Check! Floofy skirt? Check! Practical pumps? Check!

Life Magazine Photo Archive [Google]
Earlier: The Way We Were: Life Magazine Photos Of Women In The 1970s
The Way We Were: Life Magazine Photos Of Women In The 1960s
The Way We Were: Life Magazine Photos Of Women In The 1950s
The Way We Were: Life Magazine Photos Of Women In The 1940s
The Way We Were: Life Magazine Photos Of Women In The 1930s

[Hollywood, September 18. Image via Splash.]

Is it true? Is there no way to grow old and remain in the spotlight and do it in a way that respects your life and your work? I mean, for every Judi Dench, there's an Elizabeth Taylor, and Jamie Lee herself has been relegated to performing in Beverly Hills Chihuahua (no joke, that is her next film, which More describes as a story about "a pampered pooch [who] gets lost in, yes, the mean streets of Mexico.") Maybe if, instead of going on TV to talk in vague terms about empowerment and living a stripped down, un-materialistic life, she crusaded for better parts for older women in Hollywood, she'd actually make a quantifiable difference. Because as it stands now, her continued blathering about her self-actuality is getting almost as tired as the audience for AARP magazine.

[More Magazine]
Earlier: Oprah: Jamie Lee Curtis Cuts The Crap About Women And Aging

[New York, May 28. Image via Splash.]

• Did Mariah Carey have an eye job or something? She won't walk down the red carpet without her sunglasses. If so, it's probably not her first procedure; her nose and boobs seem to have changed in the past few years. [Page Six]
  
• Also: Mariah's been wearing a giant ring that gossipers want you to think is engagement-esque. And she's been hanging with Nick Cannon. [People]
  
• David Bowie and Iman's 7-year-old daughter, Alexandria, listens to Hilary Duff songs, at which point "David just leaves the room," Iman says. "He thinks she should be listening to underground music." [ONTD]

• Amy Winehouse says she's not cheating on her hubby: "Me and Blake are meant for each other, he's my man." [Mirror]
• But, um, apparently Blake Incarcerated thinks she's divorcing him and wants £3 million. These tears dry on their own. [The Sun]
• But Amy denies having an affair. [Daily Mail]
• Ashley Alexandra Dupre is suing Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis. Her statement claims that she was offered alcoholic drinks and "once intoxicated, she was induced into exposing her breasts while being filmed and told to sign a 'release' form." She was 17 at the time and not "legally competent" to enter a into a contract. She's seeking $10 million. [ET]
• Joe Francis says: "To show my appreciation, I'm sending Ashley a dozen cupcakes from Magnolia (Bakery)- assorted with sprinkles along with a card attached that says thanks for the free publicity." [Rush & Molloy]
• So yeah, Britney's back on How I Met Your Mother. Abby, the "sassy office assistant," will try and get revenge on her crush, Ted, since he's dating her boss. Yawn. [Yahoo News]
• Meanwhile, Brit's Child Custody Evaluation report, which is "several hundred" pages long, is both damaging and encouraging for Britney. [TMZ]
• Jamie Lee Curtis says of Miley's pix: "I only wish that her guardians had protected her." [People]
• Bill O'Reilly on Miley Cyrus's Vanity Fair pix: "If you have a billion dollar franchise, you don't throw it away." And what about the millions of Hannah Montana-loving kids? [Perez Hilton]
• Kathy Griffin and Apple billionaire Steve Wozniak: Dunzo. "As a matter of fact, I got an email last week from him, and he is going to marry someone else," Kathy says. "I think he might be married. I don't really know that for sure, though." [WOW]
• Tracy Ullman plays Dina Lohan on her show, State Of The Union, and says: "I think I need to get bigger, better teeth to play her... American teeth that will do her justice." [Page Six]
• Ludacris with lipstick on his collar sounds like a song. [E!
• Jason "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" Segel: Seen making out with soap star Adrienne Frantz. [Page Six]
• Kristin Bell still has her Catholic high school uniform. "I tucked that away when I was 18," she says. "I'm going to wear it on my wedding night." [Page Six]
• Pamela Anderson is now an American citizen. [Page Six]
• Dancing With The Stars' Christian de la Fuente was rushed to the hospital after being injured while dancing with Cheryl Burke. He got hurt dancing. [TMZ]
• Rocker Scott Weiland has been sentenced to 192 hours in county jail for his November DUI arrest. Good luck! [TMZ]
• Shenae Grimes, who plays Darcy on Degrassi: The Next Generation, will be joining the cast of the 90210 spinoff. I'll admit I used to watch D:TNG. The storyline where Darcy posed half naked in her cheerleader uniform and sold the pictures to some guy over the internet was crazytown. [ET]
• Is Ryan Seacrest going to get kicked off of American Idol? [MSNBC]
• A documentary fronted by Duchess of York Sarah Ferguson — in which she plays "lifestyle coach" — might be dropped from the UK's ITV after one of the participants was arrested following the discovery of the body of an 18-year-old man in her apartment. [Variety]
• Victoria Beckham's boobs are gone. Isn't that old news? [The Sun]
• Mel Gibson will be in his first feature film since 2002. He'll play a police investigator. Wouldn't it be awesome if the cop were a Jew? [Yahoo News]
• The guy accused of stalking Uma Thurman might not have broken any laws. "He loved her and possibly still does. He never wanted to annoy her, threaten her or alarm her," says his lawyer. "Creepy? Yes. Obsessed? Yes. Criminal? No." Uma is testifying in court today. [Reuters]
• Cher had a fling with Tom Cruise at the start of his career. She's 16 years older than he is! And there's a joke in there about Cher being popular with The Gays but it's best left alone. [Daily Mail]
• Janet Jackson's boobs are in the news again. She wasn't wearing a bra at the GLAAD awards and it was pretty obvious. [Daily News]
• Four words: Jimi Hendrix sex tape. Let me stand next to your fire! [NY Times]

How many of us are killing ourselves every day? Who here has high blood pressure and is still eating salt and french fries? Who has been told that her liver is enlarged and unless she stops drinking she's gonna end up with liver disease and/or need a liver transplant and/or die? We create senseless acts of violence against ourselves daily. And we live in this amnesia that we're not. If I was a doctor sitting with a woman who says, 'Oh yes, I smoke.' You do? Really? Then I don't want you as a patient..

You know..if you want to avoid your 14-year-old child drinking, make sure you don't drink in front of your 14-year-old child. If your children see that you can celebrate something without alcohol, they will not know that the first thing you do when something good happens to you is pop a bottle of Champagne... We're sedentary, we eat salt all day long. We go to the doctor, we get a blood test. We get a heart test. We get diagnostic tools that medicine has now to tell us how we are, and what do we do? We don't do anything. Or we take a drug. And that's not what I'm talking about. Take a drug so you don't have to change. No! I'm saying change. Change it right now!

Earlier: Jamie Lee Curtis: 'Mom, It's Not Right' [Huffington Post]