Throughout the episode, he also took his "fade to black" scenes to a whole new level.

And you can tell! In this scene, he can hardly keep a straight face. Playing a psychopath artiste makes him giddy with glee.

It's easy to be convinced that melodrama is his true milieu. He's snacking and drinking on set! He is just that comfortable.

There are times when it seems he might be laughing: At the lines, at the plot, at himself, at us. I mean, I know he is playing a guy who screws with people's heads, but the way he's acting is screwing with my head. "You want answers? Play nice." I'll bet he rehearsed that one in a mirror.

There is no reason to doubt he's not actually drinking vodka.

Just like there's no reason to believe he wasn't actually super high when he took this mugshot. Or is he just that good of an actor?

Raise your hand if you're leaning toward stoned.

Earlier: James Franco: General Hospital Stint Is Performance Art
Some Highlights From Today's General Hospital, Starring James Franco
WTF Hour Of Daytime TV: James Franco On General Hospital
Liveblogging James Franco's Soap Opera Debut

The actor, who is is currently enrolled in NYU's MFA filmmaking program and Columbia's MFA program for fiction writing, says:

I finally took the plunge and experimented with the form myself when I signed on to appear on 20 episodes of "General Hospital" as the bad-boy artist "Franco, just Franco." I disrupted the audience's suspension of disbelief, because no matter how far I got into the character, I was going to be perceived as something that doesn't belong to the incredibly stylized world of soap operas. Everyone watching would see an actor they recognized, a real person in a made-up world. In performance art, the outcome is uncertain-and this was no exception. My hope was for people to ask themselves if soap operas are really that far from entertainment that is considered critically legitimate. Whether they did was out of my hands.

Franco goes on to namedrop, mentioning a smattering of performance artists and people like Jackson Pollock, Willem de Kooning, Yoko Ono, Marcel Duchamp, and, of course, Casey Spooner of Fischerspooner.

He says a performance artist told him that "performance art is all about context." Which means:

…When I wear green makeup and fly across a rooftop in Spider-Man 3, I'm working as an actor, but were I to do the same thing on the subway platform, a host of possibilities would open up. Playing the Green Goblin in the subway would no longer be about creating the illusion that I am flying. It would be about inserting myself in a familiar space in such a way that it becomes stranger than fiction, along the lines of what I'm doing on General Hospital.

But the argument could be made that performance art is all about intent. A nut dressed like the Green Goblin in the subway is not an artist; an artist interested in exploring public reaction to unexpected visual stimuli could maybe be an artist.

One thing is for sure: Being knowledgeable about art does not make you an artist. Acting, in and of itself, is an art, but has Franco elevated it further just because he's taken some classes? As a reader emailed us: "As an Art Historian, I find [Franco's] article difficult to tolerate. He writes like a freshman taking Performance Art 101."

It's cool that Franco's not afraid to think outside the box, and experiment. Why he has to insist it's some cerebral enterprise is anyone's guess. But he's committed to this undertaking:

After all of the Franco episodes are aired, my character's storyline will be advanced in a special episode filmed in a "legitimate" New York gallery. One more layer will be added to this already layer-heavy experiment. If all goes according to plan, it will definitely be weird. But is it art?

Um… No. But playing a performance artist named Franco, and claiming that the performance is performance art is (much like this Port Charles mug shot) hilarious. And meta!

A Star, A Soap And The Meaning Of Art [WSJ]
PHOTO: James Franco's Port Charles ‘Mug Shot'

Earlier: Some Highlights From Today's General Hospital, Starring James Franco
WTF Hour Of Daytime TV: James Franco On General Hospital
Liveblogging James Franco's Soap Opera Debut

• Michaele and Tareq Salahi, the now-infamous White House party crashers, have "postponed" a planned appearance on Larry King Live in an attempt to instead make "hundreds of thousands of dollars" by selling their story to the highest bidder. [NYTimes]

• Tiger Woods reportedly told a friend he needed to "run to Zales to get a 'Kobe Special.'" (meaning: a giant ring) last Friday after having a fight with his wife. Kobe Bryant, you might remember, purchased a $4 million ring for his wife, Vanessa, after being accused of sexual assault. [TMZ]
• Rachel Uchitel, Woods' alleged mistress, is reportedly meeting with high-profile attorney Gloria Allred. [TMZ]
• Uchitel vehemently denies that she and Woods had an affair, though she notes that even rumors of such a thing might cause drama: "Despite it being completely untrue, it still must have certainly caused some problems at home - if I was his wife, I probably would have killed him. This is nothing to do with me. The claims are completely false. We have never had an affair, talked on the phone or sent any type of text, sexy or not. I'm really upset about it because I'm being portrayed as a home-wrecker, when it simply isn't true." [NewsOfTheWorld]
• Audio of Woods' 911 call after the accident may be released to the public at some point today. [TheSun]
• Rupert Everett says his friendship with Madonna was destroyed after Everett wrote about her in his book, Red Carpets and Other Banana Skins. "I think it is very affectionate, and certainly with her I was very careful to only write things that were," he says of the book, "But she felt it was an infringement of privacy." [Guardian]
• "I'm most drawn to characters who are compelling and repellant at the same time, very often right at the same moment, and who are frightening and funny all at once."-James Spader[NYTimes]
• "You know, a day doesn't go by where you don't think about him. It's always there, in every sense. But it will get better. It's not easy, but I know with time it will get easier. But it will never be easy. It's my brother."-Janet Jackson, on losing her brother, Michael. [TimesOnline]
• Alec Baldwin says he's lost his interest in acting and plans to give it up after his 30 Rock contract expires: "Movies are part of my past. It's been 30 years. I'm not young, but I have time to do something else," he says, "It's a difficult thing to say, but I believe it: I consider my entire movie career a complete failure." [ShowbizSpy]
• Heidi Klum has posted a picture of her (adorable) new daughter, Lou Samuel, on her website, writing that Lou is "beautiful beyond words and we are happy that she chose us to watch her grow over the coming years. From the moment she looked into both of our eyes it was endless love at first sight." [DailyMail]
• "Ive always been a businesswoman, because there's no way you can be in the music business and not be a businesswoman. It's always been a part of ever since I began in music, Since I was 16. I've always been very inclined to really just take control of the things that I want to see happen and to really be proactive about it so to extend and to expand into different ventures my entrepreneurial spirit has definitely been calling to me just because there's so many ways to express yourself and jewelry is such a beautiful expression, it's a self expression."-Alicia Keys on her new jewelry line. [WSJ]
• Martha Stewart was spotted at the Four Seasons on Thanksgiving, alongside Barbara Walters, Helen Gurley Brown, among others. Am I the only one whose mind is kind of blown by Martha Stewart going to a restaurant for Thanksgiving dinner? [PageSix]
• Jay-Z and Sean "Diddy" Combs rented out a $5000 a night room, complete with "padded walls and a couch, eight ounces of beluga caviar and a magnum of champagne," to just have a drink together and listen to some music. [PageSix]
• When the NYTimes pointed out that Lil' Wayne's music "is not necessarily lady-friendly," Beth Ditto replied: "No, but he's such an artist, and he's obsessed with [performing oral sex]. I think that's really cool and really girl-positive in a way. I think for hip-hop that's really rad." [NYTimes]
• In somewhat unsurprising news, Morrissey says he's thought about suicide, and that he thinks "self-destruction is honourable. I always thought it was. It's an act of great control and I understand people who do it." [Mirror]
• Brittany Murphy's husband was taken to the hospital yesterday for what Murphy believes was an asthma attack while on board an airplane. [TMZ]
• Fergie says she watched several Fellini films to get a feel for how Italian actresses carried themselves, in preparation for her role as an Italian prostitute in Nine. [DailyExpress]
• "I kind of became the poster girl for teen angst, which is a kind of crass way of saying it. But the teen roles that I was playing, they were bright and they were atypical. There was room there for that particular kind of character to mature, so I didn't face a great amount of resistance in that respect. But I think everybody has to fight to become a diverse artist because people are inclined to associate you with one thing or are a little unnerved by your daring to do something."-Claire Danes, on her role in My So-Called Life [WashingtonPost]
• Cindy Crawford admits that she used to receive Botox injections, "but I haven't done Botox for ten years. And I didn't do collagen, I don't think." [DailyMail]
• Though Toni Braxton's marriage of 8 years ended just days after she kissed Trey Songz onstage at the 2009 Soul Train Awards as part of a performance, Braxton claims the two are in no way related. [E!]
• Taylor Lautner was a bit shocked when Jamie Foxx approached him on the set of Lopez Tonight to ask for an autograph: "All of a sudden I hear this deep voice behind me: 'Taylor, Taylor!' .... And this guy walks up to me and he goes 'Hey ... my daughter is a huge fan, and I'm a huge fan is there any way I can get a picture with you. I'm Jamie Foxx.' I was like, 'Are you kidding me? Can I get a picture with you?'"[People]
• Interesting news for our SNL live thread crew: both James Franco and Taylor Lautner are set to host Saturday Night Live this December. Thoughts? [EW]
• When asked about Kate Moss' recent comments on how "nothing tastes as good as thin feels," Rihanna replied: "I can't believe she said. That is SO crazy. I love food because I'm from Barbados. If I was a catwalk model I'd be considered fat which I know is ridiculous." However: "I don't think people should discriminate against thicker models OR skinny models. If you're size zero you shouldn't be banned from the runway." [NewsOfTheWorld]
• "I don't care how talented you are: doing things like that is not nice. So fuck off ... Kanye just wants attention. As simple as that. He was like it before his mum died. So let's not make excuses. It's not fair to judge other people and to try to destroy their careers. Come on! Just stop it. Be nice!"-Joss Stone, who also thinks Russell Brand is "a disgusting pig. Mean, mean, mean." [Independent]

And yet: The way he flirts with this blonde whose name I do not care to know? It's sexy. Sexy, I tell you!

You know this guy. He's a beautiful liar, he's gorgeously crooked and twisted — but only "because that's how the world is." Wounded, bitter, yet still feverishly hot. You're attracted to him, but you worry he'll steal your wallet, your best friend and your silverware. I lost a video camera this way once. And my virginity. Kidding! (Maybe.)

Here's a promo for James Franco's little brother Dave Franco. And then back to the story. If the way James says "amuse ourselves" doesn't get your spot hot, then you have a problem.

If someone can show me how to make "If it makes you feel any better, I don't want to have your babies" as a ringtone, I will be forever grateful.


Last, but not least, his shirt came off. Not as good as seeing him naked in Sonny, but what do you expect?

Earlier: WTF Hour Of Daytime TV: James Franco On General Hospital
Liveblogging James Franco's Soap Opera Debut

It feels like he's laughing on the inside the entire time, like, "Dude, I'm on a fucking soap opera. Heh."


Even when he's being creepy, it's hard not to love him.


I wonder if it was in his contract that he gets slapped by a woman at least once. It's the most soap opera-y thing to experience for a man.

2:55: Okay, I'm ready. I have my TV set to ABC, a mug of mediocre coffee, and some of Entemann's surprisingly excellent madeleines. Is this appropriate snackage? I think so. I will need to muster all my wits to follow this.

2:59 They say it's "shocking."

3:00 It's on. Philandering. Interrupted philandering.

3:01 That guy has rage issues. The woman is long-suffering. Oh, here are some obvious wise-guys in dark suits.

3:02 Some dudes are planning a hit. A beggar approaches. OMG, was that beggar FRANCO?! Wait, he's going to turn so we can see his face! Yes! And there's a cover of "Mad World" playing! It is so on!

3:03 The philandering lady is really nervous. MAYBE BECAUSE HER LOVER IS HIDING IN THE NEXT ROOM! Oh, and her sweet boyfriend is talking about buying land so they can build a home together. He wears the horns. The poor cuckold.

3:06 They're all planning a "Franco exhibit" at the gallery. Five years ago he was an anonymous wall-tagger, now he's a world-renowned artist. He's a recluse though. No one's ever seen Franco. Is he a facially-challenged Phantom of the Opera, they ask? Haha! If they only knew!

3:08 Hm, maybe a perky, fashionable blonde can coax the elusive Franco to do a photo-shoot...I guess "Franco" is like a Banksy figure?

3:09 This plotline with the angry guy and the tearful woman confuses and bores me. Bring on Franco.

3:10 A shootout. The beggar/Franco is lurking in the shadows. Eating something, like Stonewall Jackson on the battle-field. He is clearly a cool customer. He assumes some kind of...karate stance?

Commercial. 3:15 "James Franco's Little Brother Dave Franco?" Yeah, he's never heard that one before. Aparently he's joining the cast of Scrubs.

3:16 We're back. Franco's "art" is apparently some kind of installation of a crime scene.

3:18 This woman had to compromise herself 50 different ways every day. Claudia found out about Dante and used that information as leverage.

3:19 The shootout continues. People alternately die or disperse. Franco, smiling in a creepy and sinister way that indicates this might be some kind of "art" to him, lurks in the shadows, then waves after the departing gangsters.

3:22 Commercial. No, I don't want to cut corners by using a broth with MSG. I like the 365 Organic one, though.

3:23 Port Charles. Is her lover going to lurk in the other room this entire episode?

3:24 Good thing she concealed that cufflink. That was close.

3:26 Uh oh, she senses looming disaster at the Franco opening. Me too. I'm also anticipating a Count-of-Monte-Cristo-style entrance in a balloon.

3:29 Now Franco is rearranging a body. He throws some change at it. "Keep the change," he intones. Commercial!

3:30 I hate that bear Charmin campaign. I just imagine their fur all matted with excrement, which I would not have thought about otherwise.

3:33 It's back. Domestic drama. Dante. Sonny. Feuds. Secrets and lies.

3:35 With one word from John, Sonny will make Dante a dead man.

3:36 Crime scene. Something's off about the position of that body...

3:38 They need to find the homeless guy. He's the only witness!

3:39 It's Franco! Out of disguise, in a large, atmospheric, geniusy apartment. There's a piano. "I need you," he says into the phone. "Should I wear anything special, or nothing at all?" says a sexyvoice.

Commercial. Has anyone tried those new readymade cookies with the all-natural ingredients? No, there's no commercial for them on, just wondering.

3:42 It's back. Ok, we get it: Olivia will always put Dante first. I have no idea what's going on and I get it. Why doesn't John?

3:44 "Someone's not going to make it out alive." Yawn. Commercial.

3:51 It's back! Crime scene. And that body is definitely suspicious. In fact, someone crushed his windpipe.

3:47 Commercial. Sigh. A segment without Franco is like...regular General
Hospital.

3:49 Those Betty Crocker cookies makes me think of the part of Heaven to Betsy when Anna says, "Ja, and I'll bet they all taste alike!"

3:53 Why did the "homeless guy" wave at them? What's his deal? Mad...or mad like a fox with knowledge of crime procedure?!

3:54 Franco's face is being caressed by sexy woman! He is kinda sweaty! They ARE MAKING OUT! She speaks only in sexy one-liners!

Commercial. Sometimes I think the only upside to some awful freak accident death is that the New York Post would refer to me as a "beauty," regardless of actual appearance.

Oh, wait, it's over? Oh. It looks like Franco makes out with a lot more people next week.

• Harpo, Inc. has released a statement saying Oprah Winfrey will make an announcement about the future of her TV show tomorrow. An insider says she told her staff today that next season will be her last.

• Her final show will air on September 9, 2011, after 25 years on the air. [TMZ, AP]
• When Courtenay Semel is on the cover of Curve, a lesbian magazine, talking about Lindsay Lohan, she is not speaking as "her former BFF, [and] socialite," People. She is speaking as Lindsay's ex-girlfriend. As in two ladies who lived together and loved each other very much and had sex. As Semel jokes, "I'd like to to say that I'm kind of like the Don Juan of the lesbian world." [People]
• Tila Tequila has been delivering a naked rant for hours on her Ustream page, saying things like, "I am an angel ... because I am here to save the world with my army," and, "People call me an attention whore .. or whatever ... but excuse me I'm a grown ass woman and I'm confident in myself ...I think a woman's body is a beautiful thing ... that's why I'm a lesbian ... I was born naked ... anybody who is against that is gay and in denial." [TMZ]
• Tila Tequila's lawyer says her meltdown is all Shawne Merriman's fault because the "domestic violence incident" has "pushed her over the edge." He admitted there's something seriously wrong with her and he's trying to get her help. [TMZ]
• Senator John Kerry's daughter Alexandra Forbes Kerry was arrested early this morning on suspicion of DUI. A blood alcohol test showed a level of .06, which is under the legal limit in California, but she can sill be prosecuted if she was operating her car unsafely due to alcohol. [TMZ]
• Senator Kerry's rep says he "supports his daughter and will have no further comment on a private matter." [TMZ]
• A judge warned Redmond O'Neal at a progress report hearing today, saying he believes he isn't working as hard as he can at rehab. His lawer says he's "committed to recovery." [Radar Online]
• He's due back in court on December 2 and the judge said, "The report better be glowing, or there will be consequences." [Radar Online]
• Chris Brown was in court today for a progress report hearing. He said he's completed 100 hours of community service and 7 of his 52 domestic violence classes. The judge was satisfied and scheduled another hearing for February 18. [TMZ]
• Rihanna said in a radio interview that she misses Chris Brown and still listens to his songs when they come on the radio. [TMZ]
• Mark Heller thinks Kate Major's breach of contract lawsuite against his client Jon Gosselin is laughable. "Kate knows Jon Gosselin is like Obama's stimulus package. Every time she needs money, she cashes in on the few days she knew Jon Gosselin," he said. [Perez Hilton]
• Sarah Jessica Parker's surrogate, Michelle Ross, testified today against the Ohio police chief accused of breaking into her home. She said that while she was living in a motel, someone broke into her home in Ohio and stole ultrasound pictures, surrogacy files, tax information, and a plaster cast of her belly from when she was pregnant with her own son. [AP]
• Amy Winehouse's father Mitch was asked to be on I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here, but he says, "When I told Amy I had the interview, she went mad - she says, 'You're not doing it dad,' she wouldn't let me do it." [The Mirror]
• Levi Johnston sees a lot of himself in his son Tripp. "He is very funky," Johnston says. "He's got a lot of energy. He's always looking to mess things up, break things. He's crazy." [People]
• BMI, which enforces music royalties, claims an Idaho bar has been playing songs by artists including John Fogerty and Taylor Swift without permission. [TMZ]
• Miley Cyrus is still dating Liam Hemsworth, her co-star in The Last Song. "I've never gotten along with someone so well," says Miley. "I was a little anxious about making this movie; I wanted everything to be perfect. To go on set and feel insecure was a totally new element for me. But he felt the same way. He admitted his insecurities, and it was really nice to have someone who understands me for once." [People]
• When Sofia Vergara was asked why she joked about rape on The View yesterday, she just laughed. [TMZ]
• Did James Franco pretend to text to get out of an awkward situation? [N.Y. Magazine]
• David Beckham ws wearing a walking boot on his right boot because he suffered a "tender foot" after receiving a "series of knocks." A rep says he's already better. [TMZ]
• The LAPD has received numerous noise complaints about Paris Hilton in the five months that she's been living with Doug Reinhardt and they say the next time anyone in the house breaks the law there will be "tickets or arrests." [TMZ]
• Levi Johnston was invited to appear on DWTS, but he says, "I'm not sure it's my thing." [Extra]
• Drew Barrymore and Justin Long are still together, but she kicked him out of her house because, "Drew really had it with being Justin's babysitter at home," says a source. "And it's not just that he made a mess, it's his attitude. He gets mopey and is a big-time couch potato. She isn't thrilled about seeing this side of him." [Star]
• Forbes released a list of the most overpaid actors in Hollywood, comparing their salaries to how much their films make. Will Ferrell, Ewan McGregor, Tom Cruise, Drew Barrymore, and Leonardo DiCaprio all made the top ten. [Perez Hilton]
• Local L.A. celebrity/2003 California gubnatorial candidate Angelyne is suing the City of Los Angeles for not delivering her fan mail. [THR, Esq.]
• Lost executive producer Carlton Cuse says the series' final season will begin on February 2 at 9 pm. [N.Y.T.]
• Jim Carrey's daughter Jane married Alex Santana last weekend. "It was a beautiful day. Simple and sweet," said Carrey. "I wish them everything that love has given us." [People]
• Avril Lavigne, who recently filed for divorce from Deryck Whibley, was seen out with Wilmer Valderama. [People]
• Steven Tyler's Aerosmith bandmates are suggesting that he may be abusing drugs again. "I think that he needs help and that attention needs to be put to his health," said drummer Joey Kramer. "He's got some bad influences in his life right now and he's making poor choices." [People]
• Brigitte Bardot asked the government of Catalonia to ban bullfighting, which she called, "an incredibly sadistic spectacle." [AFP]
• ''I would never have said I believe in ghosts, until I saw one - and I've seen a ghost with my own eyes," says Sting. ''I was in bed one night, a very old house I used to live in. And I woke up at three in the morning, bolt upright, looked into the corner of the room and thought I saw Trudie standing there with a child - our child - in her arms, staring at me. And I thought 'well, that's strange - why is she standing in a corner, staring at me?'. And I then reached next to me and there was Trudie, and I suddenly got this terrible chill. And she woke up and said 'Gosh, who is that?' and she saw this woman and a child in the corner of the room.'' [The Telegraph]
• Pedro Almodovar says he once tried to write about sadomasochism in a film script but he couldn't do it. "As I was beginning my research I found it to be so horrifying that I erased the character from the movie, because I wasn't capable," he says. "It's like having a phobia!" [AP]
• Norah Jones says when she was making her new album The Fall, "I realized, I think, what I want to do is work with some different sounds. I figured that the best way to do that was to try and step outside of my comfort zone a little bit, and work with some different musicians and a different producer. It just felt like a good time to do that." [AP]
• "People are hung up about sex and can't even talk to their children about it. I got no sex education at all, not in school or church, not at home. Some people realize that the world has changed, and others don't. When people think offensive remarks about homosexuals, it offends me. Many are offended ... it may offend their religions ... some stick to their religions. What's behind it is homophobia-the worry, the fear, the life. It's a perfectly normal, minority group of people in the world who should not be discriminated against whatsoever. People don't get it who have never met a homosexual person, or read or watch anti-gay people in the media, but when they discover that maybe their child is gay, there can be the most amazing turnaround. It means that people have to discuss the situation, and the situation is that there's no need to make life miserable for those who contribute to the community and the nation. They should be embraced." — Sir Ian McKellan [BlackBook Magazine]
• Is Robert Downey Jr. quitting acting?! "I'm fucking really good at what I do - and have been for a long time, so I don't waver on that," he says. "But here's the thing: I can only be a guy on a call sheet probably, I don't know, maybe a couple more times. It's something I'm so grateful to have in my palm, and yet I already see its inevitable decay." Or not. He adds, "If Sherlock Holmes performs well, I could be busy for the next 5 or 7 or 10 years." [EW]
• Good news for Jennifer Aniston (or so the tabloids will surely say): John Mayer sees himself getting married and having kids. "I'm pretty Norman Rockwell-like, so I can see myself in that setting," he says. "But I might also have expectations in life that don't match my behavior in life. I mean, I'm a musician who travels the world playing songs to thousands of people at the same time — and yet sometimes I believe that I'm going to be able to blacktop a driveway and drop kids off to school. I think they're both going to have to give a little bit." [CNN]
• Melissa Joan Hart says she and her husband Mark Wilkerson, "Actually prefer date lunches. Date nights, we're always tired, and we figure if the kids are in bed then we're just wasting our time, so we really like lunches. We get the nanny to come over and we go out to lunch and have a blast." [People]
• Chaz Bono says getting a sex change is the best decision he ever made: "Life is short and life is precious. This is who I am. I need to finally be who I am," said Bono. "To me, gender is between your ears, not between your legs. I've felt male as far back as I can remember." [AP]
• Olivia Wilde says she enjoyed working with her husband Tao Ruspoli on his documentary Fix because, "The most important element of the relationship between an actor and a director is trust, and because we have that build in to our relationship, I felt incredibly comfortable being directed by Tao. I was able to take risks, improvise, be completely un-selfconscious, without worrying about whether or not the director understood my intention. No one understands me better than Tao, and therefore I felt completely liberated under his direction." [Gothamist]
• General Hospital executive producer Jill Farren Phleps says, "Everybody was so impressed," with James Franco's performance on the soap. "There was an enormous amount of respect and a lot of pleasure that the crew and the cast had in seeing this guy come and take it so seriously, do it so well and do such justice to it." [CNN]
• Dakota Fanning says she and Kristen Stewart share a passionate kiss in The Runaways. "We're playing Joan Jett and Cherie Currie and they're best friends in the film and became really close in real life," said Fanning, who explained the kiss saying, "That's something that went down back in the '70s." [Us]

• According to documents filed by the FBI and U.S. Attorney's office today, an acquaintance of Cindy Crawford's former nanny threatened to sell a picture of her 7-year-old daughter bound to a chair in revealing clothing.

• Cindy Crawford's rep has issued a statement saying she and her husband Rande Gerber had no knowledge of the photo and that it was taken as part of a game. [Radar Online]
• As you'll recall, Michael Lohan just released a tape in which Dina Lohan talks about Lindsay Lohan cutting herself. The tape is from last year, but Radar Online found pictures of Lindsay with new cuts on her arms from this summer. [Radar Online]
• Before running out of Crown Bar on Thursday to cry in an alley, Lindsay Lohan ordered a bottle of champagne but when she was given the bill, "Lindsay pointed over at Kellan Lutz and told the waitress just to charge his card," said a source. [Fox News]
• Someone pulled the fire alarm at Dorchester in London in the middle of the night yesterday, forcing Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, and Taylor Lautner to stand out on the street. [E!]
• "If I was friends with Bella I'd be like, 'Please make life easier and date Jacob,'" said Kristen Stewart. [People]
• Twilight director Catherine Hardwicke has confirmed that Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are dating — sort of. "After I cast him, I told Rob, Don't even think about having a romance with her. She's under 18. You will be arrested," she said. Though she "didn't have a camera in the hotel room" while they were shooting Twilight, "In terms of what Kristen told me directly, it didn't happen on the first movie. Nothing crossed the line while on the first film... I think it took a long time for Kristen to realize, O.K., I've got to give this a go and really try to be with this person." [Radar Online]
• Balloon Dad Richard Heene has surrendered himself to authorities. You can check out his mug shot here: [Radar Online]
• Though Donald Trump denies Carrie Prejean's accusation that he rated Miss USA contestants back stage, audio has surfaced of him implementing "The Trump Rule," in which he and his staff select the women who will automatically make it past the first round. [TMZ]
• Carrie Prejean pulled out of a talk she was supposed to give today at the Capitol Hill Club in Washington, D.C. because she didn't want to be asked about the new allegation that she was actually 20, not underage, in her sex tape. [TMZ]
• Miss California USA pageant director Keith Lewis says, "The public is finally getting a glimpse of the real Carrie Prejean who lives in her own delusional world. The childish behavior, her negative attitude, the sarcasm and condescending tone, the disrespect and continual lying she is demonstrating now is only a fraction of what we endured during her reign and after... I sincerely hope she is able to get the psychological help I believe she has shown to clearly need." [TMZ]
• Many fans are selling their tickets to Britney Spears' upcoming Melbourne and Sydney shows because they're distraught over her Australian lip synching scandal. [News.com.au]
• Britney Spears worships Satan and is hoping the "new world order" will arrive soon... or her Twitter account was hacked. [TMZ]
• This was bound to happen eventually: Levi Johnston is reaching out to Jon Gosselin saying, "He's a good guy... He's kind of in the same situation I am right now. He's a good dad and he gets a lot of bad press. He's getting the same bad image as I am and it ain't true. I can relate to that." [People]
• When asked about the size of his penis Levi Johnston said, "A lot of people ask that, but you're just going to have to wait until next week when the magazine comes out. You will have to wait and see. I'm sorry, you're going to have to." [N.Y. Magazine]
• In the video at the link Chris Brown is posing with fans at Footaction in New York when a woman in the crowd screams, "fucking beater" and "I hope someone beats the fucking crap out of you." Chris smiles and walks past her, but one of his fans yells "Smack that bitch up." [TMZ]
• Rihanna says the new music video, which will be released tomorrow, is "kind of twisted but it's going to make people think. There's a great message and story behind it. 'Russian Roulette' is all about a fear, whether it be fear of love or a fear of getting hurt, whether it be emotionally or physically." [The Mirror]
• Nicole Forrester, the stripper who claims she slept with Josh Duhamel, has apologized to Fergie. "I thought, 'Nobody's gonna find out. It's not gonna hurt anybody," she says "I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I didn't think of it at the time like I think of it now." [Extra]
• Fergie's mom, Terri Jackson, defended Josh Duhamel saying, "My daughter's life is amazing and Josh is a great guy - that story is bullshit as far as I'm concerned... It was totally ridiculous and absurd and I'm confident their marriage will weather the media storm." [Radar Online]
• Two of Nicholas Cage's New Orleans homes were auctioned today because he didn't pay the mortgages. [TMZ]
• Joe Perry says he doesn't consider Steven Tyler a part of Aerosmith anymore even though he sang with the band on Tuesday. "[Tyler] wants to take two years off from the band. The rest of the band wants to keep on working. We have so many different options to fill up that time. Anything is possible at this point," said Perry. [Contact Music]
• Tara Reid has been wearing a new pink diamond ring. She says, "I got a beautiful ring from my boyfriend for my birthday last weekend, but we're not engaged ... yet!" [People]
• Extra claims Joe Torre said Kate Hudson is "relaxing" A-Rod, but all he said was, "Somebody is relaxing him, that's all I can say, because he certainly looked like he enjoyed himself this year." [Extra]
• Leona Lewis says she's getting over being attacked by a fan because, "I'm from Hackney, so I'm hard - I'm not going to let something like that bother me." She added, "When you grow up where I did you learn to move on. There was always some kind of craziness going on in my neighborhood. The boys were always fighting each other and there was loads of street crime. I know how to look after myself." [The Mirror]
• George Hamilton has joined the cast of the UK version of I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here!" [AFP]
• Check out spoilers for Big Bang Theory, Grey's Anatomy, Glee, and a slew of other network shows here: [Entertainment Weekly]
• Stephanie Pratt says her recent DUI arrest was, "The worst thing to happen to me and, at the same time, it was the biggest blessing. I learned to not fall apart, which is something that I usually do when something goes bad in my life. I learned that it is all about temptation and that I am being tested." [People]
• Court officials in Arizona say Mike Tyson punching a paparazzo at LAX yesterday may have been a violation of his probation. If it's found that he broke the law he could do 2.5 years in prison. [TMZ]
• This Is It has taken in more than $200 million worldwide in the past two weeks. [Reuters]
• John Branca and John McClain have been named the executors of Michael Jackson's estate. [TMZ]
• Listen to Lady Gaga and Beyonce's Video Phone here: [Perez Hilton]
• Robert De Niro says he's glad it took him a little while to become famous. "I think it's important to have had at least a few years of obscurity, where people treat you like everybody else," he says. "Then it goes crazy, and all of a sudden people behave differently toward you, they're agreeing with you all the time, they're not telling you no." [Parade]
• Elizabeth Hurley has a new diet trick: "I don't miss having a glass of wine because I've switched to vodka," said the hawt momma. "I don't really like vodka that much but if I'm at a party I have a small one with a lot of fizzy water and a huge squeeze of lime. Initially it's like medicine but I've got used to it now." [Perez Hilton]
• James Franco's "frequent artistic collaborator" Carter is behind his guest appearance on General Hospital. "It's for several different things," says carter. "It was an idea that I posed to him, and it's tied to another film that he and I are working on now. It's not specifically for another project, because I know that he's really enjoying the challenge of working on a soap - it's a very taxing job, and an interesting thing for him to be doing - but it does have to do with another film that he and I are working on." [Movieline]

• Some people were offended by the jokes Alex Borstein made about Marlee Matlin's speaking voice on Sunday's Family Guy special. She says, "It was sick. It was twisted. It was rude... and I was glad to be part of it."

• "People love [Seth MacFarlane's] stuff. They don't pay him the big bucks for nothing," Matlin wrote in an email. "I want to do it again and BE the voice. BTW, it only would've been offensive if I hadn't laughed and I loved that you couldn't quite figure out if I was seriously angry at Alex or not!" [Hollywood Insider]
• Jon Voight says he and Angelina Jolie have reconciled. "We're in touch, but not regularly," he says. "We love each other and that's the most important thing." [Us]
• "Amy Winehouse is addicted to table tennis." [Mirror]
• John Travolta, who recently started playing tennis, says, "I play at midnight... Kind of vampire style." [People]
• The Twilight kids are on the cover of Entertainment Weekly this week and in the mag Taylor Lautner says, "Jacob and Bella are so open, and they can tell each other everything. So it was very important for me and Kristen to grow very close before doing this." [Just Jared]
• "The highlight of playing Jane [in New Moon]was getting to wear the costume and the red contact lenses and to play an evil character," says Dakota Fanning. "I think red eyes make everyone look very evil." [L.A.T.]
• If you want to watch Robert Pattinson talk about his facial hair, check out this video: [Pop Sugar]
• Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt have written a book called How To Be Famous: Our Guide to Looking the Part, Playing the Press and Becoming a Tabloid Fixture. [Ok]
• In the video at the link, Robert Halderman's lawyer explains that he wasn't trying to blackmail David Letterman, he was just giving him the right of first refusal on his screenplay. [TMZ]
• David Letterman's lawyer says he's "absolutely" ready to testify against Robert Halderman and is "fully prepared to see this case through to the end." [CBS News]
• Sad news: Though Celine Dion announced she was pregnant this summer, it was a misdiagnosis. Her husband Rene Angelil said, "We're living the reality of the majority of couples who face these procreation techniques." [Us]
• Sources say TLC's lawyers are watching all of Jon Gosselin's TV appearances so they can run a tab on how much money he's making since he allegedly violated his contract with the network. [TMZ]
• Shanna Moakler says she's "looking forward to seeing" Carrie Prejean's sex tape. [TMZ]
• Last night Susan Boyle sang on DWTS and got to meet her idol, Donny Osmond. "It is quite something to be in Hollywood," she explains. "This is a world I've never seen before and never dreamt that I would get to see," said Boyle, who added that Hollywood is, "Nothing a woman like me was used to. I have found Americans to be incredibly warm and friendly and very open." [People]
• Susan Boyle says after she became famous, "There were phone calls 24 hours a day. They kept me awake for three weeks, until I changed my number. It was constant... "It got to the stage where I couldn't even go outside because the media - American television crews, too - surrounded the house... Everything had built up, and I was exhausted. You have to understand, my life ceased to be normal." [Show Biz Spy]
• Joey Lawrence and his wife Chandie Yawn-Nelson are expecting their second child. [Us]
• Mickey Rourke says after his divorce from Carre Otis, "I don't want to live with an actress again, no matter how they look. I'm working opposite Megan Fox and Eva Green next, and I'm certainly not complaining. But I'll tell you, once bitten..." [Daily Express]
• Though Steven Tyler played with Aerosmith on Tuesday, Joe Perry says he still doesn't know if that means he's staying in the band. "I was totally surprised. I had no idea he was going to show up," said Perry. "All I know is we walked off stage and were sitting taking our break [before] the encore and there was a bunch of commotion and I looked up and Steven was there." [People]
• Halle Berry says she decided to get involved with Jenesse Center, a L.A. domestic violence shelter, because, "My mother was a battered woman and that was my childhood for a good chunk of it... I care, I really care about these women and children." [Us]
• John Cusack on being called an "everyman": "I've been called worse, but I'm not the best person to ask about that. I think it's a compliment if it's sort of a leading-man type compliment. You get the audience to sympathize with you ... it's kind of a cool thing to be an 'everyman' I guess." [BlackBook Magazine]
• Ian McKellen says sometimes gay actors ask him for advice about coming out and he says, "When I act, some people fancy me and some of them are women. There we are! What's the problem? They don't believe me when I say I am in love with a woman?...They don't believe me when I say I am a wizard? They believe me even though they know I am not. It's all nonsense. Everyone knows we are acting." [Reuters]
• Tori Amos says she did a lot of research before recording her holiday album Midwinter Graces because, "In order to make this kind of record and to have it work, I needed to know what the carol writers were doing, then you need to know the theology of where it came from in order to change it. I did change it in making it more inclusive rather than exclusive. Because some of these lyrics were written, it was in a very puritanical time. Women had no rights, they couldn't vote. Some of the music would've been fifteenth century." [N.Y. Magazine]
• You can stop holding your breath — Pamela Anderson says she'll never rekindle her romance with Tommy Lee again. "You can't get heartbroken any more over all the disappointments or how he is as a father or anything like that. He doesn't think he's doing anything wrong. I do tell him the truth, but it's been 10 years of suffering over him so I'm over it," she says. "Whatever it is, it is - as long as my kids are happy and we're happy and we're safe, let him run around the world. I support him." [New]
• Ronnie Wood of the Rolling Stones has been very openly dating much younger women for over a year, but his wife Jo Wood just filed divorce papers accusing him of adultery. [TMZ]
• "I definitely keep myself secret," says Leona Lewis. "I went on a show watched by millions of people, so this might sound ridiculous, but I had no desire to be famous, and I still don't. I have this media persona – "She's a shy girl, really nice" – but you can't get to know someone like that. Unless you talk to me every day, you're not really going get a sense of me." [The Telegraph]
• James Franco says he doesn't think he can study in Columbia University's Butler Library anymore. He explains: "Last night I went in, I went into the restroom and this guy was in there and he's mumbling like, 'You're James Franco, right?' I'm like, 'Yeah, how's it going?' Basically, he said he was annoyed with me that I came to the library and that there are girls in the library. He didn't express himself. I think what he meant was that he thought I came to the library to meet young girls and he said it wasn't fair. And I tried to apologize for any disruption my presence had, but he was still annoyed. So I left and I went to the writing building, which is a little more private, but I have to sit there alone in the dark." [Gothamist]
• Jason Schwartzman, whose mom is Talia Shire, said, "I think it's an amazing thing that two words like 'Yo, Adrian' have been so unforgotten. People yell it out when you achieve something, or you've spent a lot of energy and you accomplish something. You yell it out like, 'I did it!' Growing up a lot of kids didn't know my mom [Talia Shire] was in Rocky. And we'd go to P.E. class and we'd have to go jogging; everyone would run up stairs and all the kids would yell it out. They didn't even know my mom was in the movie. It made me feel kind of awkward but also kind of so happy." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Hip-hop artists are "completely gay-friendly. Are you kidding me? Look at how they dress!" said Fergie. "Kanye West really did a great thing for hip-hop and made it very mixed and open." [MTV]

So, assuming that this is his art studio, and seeing the sign in the background, will Franco be playing a character named Franco?


It appears that he's a multi-media artist, expressing himself through photography, painting, and evidently—from this still—installations. (This bed setup so Tracey Emin circa '99.)


He's also into graffiti. What does his tag mean? Is it some kind of James Bond 007 thing?

• Dina Lohan is pissed that Michael Lohan keeps leaking recordings of Dina and Lindsay's phone calls to him. "The tapes were from a long time ago, and for a father to stoop this low is unforgivable," she says. And:

"My ex-husband has been in and out of jail for 10 years. My children and I gave him a chance to get to know them again, and he clearly blew that chance!" And: "I have had a criminal order of protection from the domestic violence sector since 2005. He was not supposed to even be harassing me by phone." Lastly, if you're still listening: "My heart is breaking for my children that he could do this. He has no visitation anymore and is six months behind in child support. The authorities have been alerted!" [E!]

• Hey, guess what? Michael Lohan has released another recording of a phone conversation between himself and Dina Lohan. She blames him for Lindsay cutting herself, and says: "It's bad." And Dina believes that "something's gonna happen" and it'll be all Michael's fault. [Radar Online]
• Rosie O'Donnell and Megan Fox are afraid of Angelina Jolie. Kristen Stewart says she doesn't want to be like Angelina Jolie. This column asks, Is Hollywood turning on Angelina Jolie? Eh, do you think she gives a shit? [MSNBC Scoop]
• This daytime noir Donnie Darko-esque promo for James Franco on General Hospital is kind of fucking awesome. "Anyone can die at anytime!" [NY Magazine]
• Miss J says of his 7-year-old son: "He insists on wearing nice shoes. I think somehow my fashion genes must have slipped in there." [Us Magazine]
• Kate Hudson is "pushing" A-Rod to elope. Because that's what women do! [Gatecrasher]
• Rihanna spent more than $50,000 to fly her family to New York from Barbados for the Glamour Awards. [Page Six]
• You can watch Rihanna's speech from the Glamour Woman of the Year Awards at the link. A snippet: "Maya Angelou, I love you, but you make this terribly difficult for me." [YouTube]
• LOL headline of the day, via Russell Brand: "Katy Can't Do Your Show… She's Doing Me Instead." [The Sun]
• Kristen Stewart on those who ask whether she and Rob are an item: "The only way that I'm able to stay sane is to protect myself, and like, I know that it doesn't matter how you answer a question, it's going to tip. Someone's going to say, 'She's totally with him,' or, 'No, I don't think she is,' so it's sort of like, I don't care. You just have to seriously be like, have it, have it all. Take my, you know what I mean, just like, you want my shoes? Here you go, what size do you wear?" [ET]
• The 40-year-old women following Zac Efron around were just trying to get his picture for their daughters. No, really. [Page Six]
• Emma Thompson made some comments about her adopted Rwandan son had been subjected to racism at the University of Exeter, and now the Culture Secretary has said: "Miss Thompson is a great actress, but her comments about Exeter… are insulting… Any incidence of racism is one too many, but Exeter comes top or near top in every survey of places for friendliness and quality of life." [Telegraph]
• Sharon Stone was at a fancy Madison Avenue salon and used a private room; Queen Noor of Jordan was also there to get her hair done, but sat in the main area with the plebes. [Page Six]
• The David Letterman blackmail case is "all out war." [NY Post]
• Michael Jackson's funeral bills are in. Total cost: $855,730.31. [TMZ]
• Janet Jackson, called here "the only Jackson who was flush with cash," fronted $49,000 for Michael Jackson's funeral. She'll be reimbursed via his estate, which will also pay the remaining balance. [TMZ]
• Joe Jackson, who was trying to object to Michael Jackson's will and executors, has been shut down by a judge. [TMZ]
• An Andy Warhol portrait of Michael Jackson sold for $812,000 in an auction last night. [NY Post]
• "Winona Ryder and Barry Pepper have been cast to star in the Hallmark Hall of Fame movie When Love Is Not Enough: The Lois Wilson Story." It's the true story of the co-founder of Al-Anon and her alcoholic husband, who lived the high life in the 1920s but a downfall by the 50s. [Variety]
• Playgirl wanted to shoot Levi Johnston in the penthouse of a certain downtown hotel but didn't have enough cash to pay the fee. [Page Six]
• Dominique Swain, who once posed for PETA, has reportedly been "caught" dumping unvaccinated puppies at an animal shelter. [ONTD, Fox 411]
• Heather Locklear's return to Melrose Place is a desperate attempt to get people to care. Is it working on you? Then check out this clip from the show in which Heather — playing Amanda — says, "When I hired you to give this place a makeover, I didn't mean smear it with lipstick and turn it into a five-dollar hooker." [People]
• Celine Dion is adding a "pool complex" to her home in Jupiter Island, Florida — with "two giant pools, waterslides and a lazy river, much like an amusement park." One neighbor complains: "Distasteful is what it looks like - the whole thing sounds like a Michael Jackson fairyland to me." [MSNBC Scoop via Life & Style]
• Some dude is suing Bon Jovi, Time Warner and Major League Baseball for $400 billion, yeah, BILLION, dollars. He claims that he wrote an ode to the Boston Red Sox entitled, "(Man I Really) Love this Team." During the 2007 playoffs, Bon Jovi released a song, "I Love This Town," and the guy took the case to court. One judge dismissed it, but the guy is appealing. [Reuters]
• George Lopez's new late night talk show debuted with strong ratings. Did anyone watch? I found it only mildly funny, with too many race jokes. But I didn't watch the whole thing. [Reuters]
• Steven Tyler supposedly quit Aerosmith, but last night he showed up at an NYC club for Joe Perry's show, announced he wasn't leaving Aerosmith, and joined in on "Walk This Way." My friend Matt says: "If anyone can save the future of Aerosmith by settling the feud between Steven Tyler and Joe Perry, it's got to be Tyler Perry." [Roger Friedman's 411.com] 
• Shakira hugged and 11-year-old fan and it is news. [Page Six]
• Sir Ian McKellan mocked Jude Law at a charity event; Jude swore, "I go home religiously every night after Hamlet." Sir Ian joked, "I guess the night I saw you, you went home via [popular NYC nightclub] the Box." [La Dolce Musto]
• Julianne Hough and Chuck Wicks have broken up. [People]
• "A rare collection of Beatles autographs and photographs, given to a 14-year-old who traipsed across Salisbury plain in the rain to catch a glimpse of her heroes on the set of Help!, sold for £2,200 at auction in Berkshire yesterday." [Guardian]
• Rod Stewart, father of seven, is trying to have another baby with wife Penny Lancaster. Forever young? [People]
• Whatshername will be on I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here but arrive late and earn five times more cash than other contestants. [The Sun]
• "I think there's a lot of persuasive and powerful people around Obama. For a president to make his own decisions, I think that's a rarity. Even someone who we think of as our guy — this is a guy with integrity, a guy who cares, for the first time in a long time — in the Oval Office, even with him we don't really know who's pulling the strings. I think of every president as being a marionette. Whether he's any different, I don't know. Certainly his military advisers all want him to prosecute this war to the end, just as they did in Vietnam with LBJ. It's just too depressing, I think we're going to have to hit the streets. Obama has the chance of becoming JFK or LBJ. I think JFK was one of our last great presidents, although I thought Carter was pretty great too. LBJ could have been a great president if he hadn't gotten bogged down in war, but that was quite a war to get bogged down in. Notwithstanding the fact that the war was wrong and they were talking about the Red Scare and the domino effect, if you go and read the Pentagon Papers they were also talking about rubber, tin and oil. They killed two and a half million people. What was it all for? In Korea they killed four and a half million. Like, we're liberating these people?" — Woody Harrelson plays a soldier in his intense new film The Messenger and, at the link, has lots of thoughts about war, death, the military and President Obama. [Salon]
• "They got in trouble because my children are riding their dirt bikes through the whole trailer park, going crazy, doing flips — and everyone's concerned for their safety. And mom's like, 'Oh, they've been riding the whole weekend, they're having a blast!' I was like, 'They're not allowed to ride their dirt bikes in the trailer park!' They terrorize the neighborhood the whole time." — Pamela Anderson's sons — 13 and 11 — are tiny terrors. [Contact Music]
• "I don't have to play scenes with actors standing on buckets." — Sigourney Weaver, 6 feet tall, says that she doesn't believe her height has ever intimidated leading men. [Telegraph]
• "I had a great time with Hef and the girls when they came to see Peepshow and hang out in Vegas.  I don't watch the other episodes though, because it kind of makes me mad. The girls need to focus on what makes them unique and not doing the same things Bridget, Kendra and I have already done on the show.  Even camping in the backyard was an idea I had for an episode that we never got around to shooting.  And guess what they just showed? The girls camping in the backyard.  I don't want to look behind, I want to look forward." — Holly Madison is annoyed by the new Girls Next Door. [Fox 411]
• "I don't know that [Oprah] and Gayle are necessarily doing each other, but I think they are the emotional equivalent of.. [a gay couple]. When they did that road trip, that's as gay as it gets, and I don't mean it to be an insult, either. I'm just saying, listen, if you ask me, that's the couple." — Rosie O'Donnell. [ONTD via Times Of The Internet]
• "These jeans are a few days old, but the top is probably fresh because it gets to the point where even I can't stand the air around me. I don't know, my personal hygiene - it's so disgusting! Really it's just that I have very few clothes that I like and I'm travelling all the time, so I can't really get any more." — we get it, Robert Pattinson, you're filthy. [MSNBC via New! magazine]
• "I love clothes, and fashion is a great art form. Being a woman and my femininity are very important to me. But with my work I have to check my preferences at the door and personify the character I am playing as best I can. Your character isn't who you are. That's the great thing about my job. I get to step into somebody else's shoes – whether that's a pair of flat brogues or some stilettos." — Hilary Swank. [Daily Mail]
• "I'd love to have kids… But I'm much to young to get married." — Shakira. [Gatecrasher]
• "The funny thing is that I was very open and honest about [my bisexuality] from the very beginning, and everyone was acting like it was some new trend. Go back four or five years, people, and you'll see the same answer. I've been very honest with him from the get-go. I think women are beautiful. I've had a lot of fun with women, and I'm not ashamed of it. The problem is that I also love a well-endowed man. But just because I enjoy women doesn't mean I'm allowed to have affairs in my relationship. I learned through talking with my therapist that it is still cheating even if it's with girls, so there is a rule there." — Fergie. [Us Magazine via The Advocate, Page Six]
• "Lady Gaga stole your act." — President Obama to Cyndi Lauper. [La Dolce Musto]

• Madonna is in Brazil, but not to meet Jesus' parents. She says:

"I am going there strictly for fund raising and humanitarian purposes." Her Madgesty is sponsoring a documentary about kids living in the squalid hillside slums. [Page Six]

• Guess who was seeing Heath Ledger when he died? Lindsay Lohan. Her mom, Dina, tells Michael Lohan about it in this — you guessed it — recorded phone conversation. In the audio, Dina says Lindsay "cannot be alone" and sleeps with Dina when she is home because she has fears of being alone. [Radar Online]
• In a newly released 2008 taped phone call between Lindsay Lohan's assistant, Jenni Muro, and Michael Lohan, the former says: "I am trying to save your daughter's life every day." Muro was also pissed she had to relocate to NYC so LL could be on Ugly Betty, saying: "I get a 5% commission on this entire TV show and it's sick and disgusting and I'm here and I give up my boyfriend and my dog and my parents and my new place in LA and everything so that your daughter doesn't kill herself, ok?" [ONTD via Radar]
• A recent Tweet from Lindsay Lohan: "i'm a regular person to.. i sleep, eat, laugh, cry, shower, have blood running through my veins, i have a heart, etc etc- lol" [Twitter]
• People: I have seen a clip of Lady Gaga's new video, "Bad Romance," and there is latex and implied violence and dancing! The full video debuts Monday, and Ms. Gaga says: "There's this one shot in the video where I get kidnapped by supermodels. I'm washing away my sins and they shove vodka down my throat to drug me up before they sell me off to the Russian mafia." In addition, Gaga wears razor-blade sunglasses: "I wanted to design a pair for some of the toughest chicks and some of my girlfriends - don't do this at home! - they used to keep razor blades in the side of their mouths. That tough female spirit is something that I want to project. It's meant to be, 'This is my shield, this is my weapon, this is my inner sense of fame, this is my monster.'" [MTV News]
• Amy Winehouse loves her new boobs and now wants butt implants to get that "pin-up look." [The Sun]
• Joe Halderman — the CBS news producer accused of trying to extort cash from David Letterman — goes to court today for the first hearing in his criminal case. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Joe Halderman's friends are helping him pay his legal bills. [TMZ]
• Justin Timberlake has been dealing with a stalker, and submitted a statement to a judge yesterday which read: "I fear for my personal safety." He called the behavior of woman in question "ever-increasing, aggressive and harassing." [TMZ]
• At the link, James Franco talks about his upcoming stints on 30 Rock and General Hospital. Of doing a soap opera, he says: "It's been a blast so far. It was kind of mind-blowing. I've worked one day on it. It's one day of a few. But I think we packed seven episodes of my material in." He also reveals that he has not worn an eyepatch. Yet. [NY Magazine]
• Oh dear: Tracy Morgan's stand-up show at Carnegie Hall was so crazy, people walked out. And not crazy in the good way — he called homosexuality a choice and joked, "Obama is really changing the White House, because he and Michelle will have the first presidential sex tape out." [Gatecrasher]
• "Dr. Conrad Murray was on the phone with his girlfriend as Michael Jackson was dying." [TMZ]
• Joe Jackson is being meddlesome with the executors of Michael Jackson's will. [CNN]
• Naomi Campbell is going on a month-long, £1 million vacation with boyfriend Vladislav Doronin, and she is calling it a honeymoon, though they're not married. Grain of salt on this one. [The Sun]
• Levi Johnston has Tweeted: "BREAKING NEWS !!!! SNL APPEARANCE THIS SAT… you hear it first !!!" My guess is that he'll be in the news segment, but you never know — we could get a Tina Fey/Sarah Palin appearance! [MSNBC Scoop]
• Levi Johnston is reportedly going to file for joint custody of his son Tripp. [Page Six]
• Ugh. Carrie Prejean's autobiography is out so she is still in the damn spotlight. She claims the Miss California USA pageant director pressured her into getting a boob job. [Radar Online]
• By the by, Carrie Prejean says her "solo sex tape" was the biggest mistake of her life. [TMZ]
• Director Lee Daniels is not pushing for an Oscar for Precious: "It scares me," he says. When he first heard Oscar talk, "I was completely thrown off guard. I was like … Oscar who? Oscar de la Renta?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Actress Emma Thompson's art project takes viewers on 'Journey' of sex slave" [NY Daily News]
• John Travolta has to promote his new flick Old Dogs, even though he is struggling to get by since the death of his son. He says: "
  "We've been working very hard every day as a family to heal. We have our own way of doing it, and it has been helping." [USA Today]
• Congrats to Halle Berry, who will receive the Sherry Lansing Leadership Award at The Hollywood Reporter's 18th annual Women in Entertainment breakfast presented by Lifetime. Past recipients include Barbara Walters, Meryl Streep, Jodie Foster and Glenn Close. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Entourage's Kevin Connolly gambles and hangs with Playmates. [Page Six]
• Donald Trump and Omarosa will be reunited for Omarosa's new dating reality show on TV One, called Omarosa's Ultimate Merger, on which she tries to choose a love interest from a selection of 12 bachelors. [Variety]
• Boo: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar has been diagnosed with chronic myeloid leukemia. [People]
• "The only thing worse than Aerosmith with Steven Tyler is Aerosmith without Steven Tyler." [NY Post]
• Hot hottie Jason Lewis — you know, he played hottie Smith Jerrod — has been cast as the lead in a new show called Rio! He'll play an international detective (?!?!) who goes to Brazil to investigate a crime… and decides to stay after enjoying the city, its beaches and nightlife. It's Miami Vice and Magnum PI and maybe even Hawaii 5-0. Also, he's hot. [Page Six]
• Someone spilled a drink on Russell Simmons at a party. [Page Six]
• Twilight's Christian Serratos is getting naked for a PETA ad. She's 19. [Gatecrasher]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Kelly Kapowski is pregnant. [Gatecrasher]
• Whatshisname sued a tabloid magazine and won libel damages. [BBC News]
• "When you hear the phrase 'only in America,' it means something extraordinary, something extreme, something good. But if someone were to say ‘only in Britain,' it would be something damp, miserable, no, not until Wednesday and then it's unlikely." — Stephen Fry is promoting Stephen Fry In America and might come live in the U.S. [Daily Express]
• "If he wanted to go down that road he probably would have done so by now. And I think he is a very solid and faithful person." — Mel Gibson's girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva, who has dated Mel and given birth while he's still legally married to his wife of 29 years. [MSNBC]
• "There wasn't going to be any more Juliet, and now there is going to be more Juliet. That's all I can say. I wish I could say more. I don't really like to be so close-lipped, but it kind of just goes with the show." — Lost's Elizabeth Mitchell. [USA Today]
• "How do I still look good? I owe 30 per cent to genes, 30 per cent to good sex, 30 per cent because of sports and healthy lifestyle with proper nutrition and for the remaining 10 per cent – I have to thank my plastic surgeon. I'm 71 and physically don't feel so good since I'm in pain. But I'm happier, the sex is better and I understand life better. I don't want to be young again." — Jane Fonda just had spine surgery, a new knee and hip made of titanium, but she had to get herself repaired because she wants to climb the Himalayas. [Telegraph]
• "I smoke weed, but I don't think it's really a drug. 'It's more of a herb. I don't regret saying that at all. I think everyone smokes weed and people who say they don't are lying! Weed has been given this evil stamp, but how is it dangerous? It's going to make you laugh your arse off? You might go to sleep? I think alcohol is much more harmful. People beat the f**k out of each other on alcohol." — Joss Stone should change her name to Joss Stoned. [Daily Mail]
• "I really enjoy acting. I like being in front of the camera. I think I should be an action star." — Serena Williams, that makes two of us. [NY Daily News]
• "Elevators scare me — just being stuck without phone service when you're alone. Small spaces are fine, if I'm with someone in an elevator fine, but I will not buy an apartment on the 14th floor of a building that's for sure, I've gotta be able to walk. … The unknown is very scary. …I'm scared of a lot of women, certain women because I guess I don't have a lot of confidence in myself, I don't know what it is." — Amanda Seyfried. [Mirror]
• "We're discovering who the enemy are, and I do think we do have an enemy. It means that everyone's got to go on fighting. And in what way you fight, well, it depends who you are… You can write a letter, you can talk about it to your congressperson… you can talk to people in bars… Or you can go on marches, or you can go and break windows." — Sir Ian McKellan on the fight for gay marriage. [Page Six]

Of course, he's also making fun of the stereotypical asshole actor whose investment in the brand-names he represents is superficial, at best. Touché, Franco. Touché.

James Franco: Gucci Commercial Outtakes [Funny Or Die]

[New York, October 17. Image via Getty.]

[New York, August 3. Image via x17.]

• Though Kate Gosselin filed for divorce from Jon on Monday, the filing does not contain custody information at this time. Will Kate ask for primary custody? How much time will Jon get? [Star Magazine]

• By the by, those Crooked Houses Jon & Kate's 8 play in? $7,000 a piece. [ABC News]
• Kate Gosselin is on People magazine, with the cover line: "It feels like I failed." [People]
• New Jon & Kate episodes will include Jon's new girlfriend, 23-year-old Deanna Hummel. [Gatecrasher]
• "Reports this week claim Aniston has been sent text messages by Angelina Jolie demanding she 'back off'." Heh. Hahhaha. Ha. [Daily Mail]
• Is Britney Spears going to be in a Nazi movie? Brain… cannot… compute. [National Ledger]
• Rihanna didn't take the stand in Chris Brown's court case, so now Cover Girl has resumed its ad campaign featuring the singer. It's okay to think she's pretty again! [TMZ]
• Perez Hilton has released a new statement in which he says: "Words can hurt." And: "I wish none of it had happened. I can't take it back." And: "Who I am as a person and what I do for a living are two separate things." And: "Several television and radio shows over the past couple of days echoed the sentiment 'He had it coming'. Would they have said the same thing if I was a woman? Would I have 'deserved it' if I had been stabbed? Or shot? Or killed?" [Perez]
• Anne Hathaway loans her friends designer dresses out of her closet. [Gatecrasher]
• If you work for Oprah, you're going on a trip! She is taking 100 employees - and their families - on an all-expenses paid 10-day cruise around the Mediterranean. JEALOUS. [Gatecrasher via Pop Crunch]
• "Madonna is trying to recreate her beloved Wiltshire manor in the middle of Manhattan." [The Sun]
• "Fitness fanatic Madonna has banned smoking roadies from coming within 50ft of her…" [The Sun]
• Video of Zachary Quinto walking his dog with a friend who is dressed as a giant steak. Quinto falls, curses. The walking resumes. Inexplicable. [ONTD]
• LOL: Ellen's variety show will be called Bigger Longer & Wider. It debuts on TBS this Saturday at 9pm, with Kanye West, David Blaine and Nick Cannon among the performers. [USA Today]
• More drama involving Danielle Staub from the Real Housewives of New Jersey: The Smoking Gun has discovered that in 1986, she was charged with eight felonies, including extortion, cocaine possession, and narcotics conspiracy. And you know how Staub told People she was "never a prostitute. Never"? She told a federal agent she worked for an escort service. [MSNBC, The Smoking Gun]
• Great Q&A with Teresa from RHONJ at the link; she's asked if there's a little too much onyx and granite in her house abd says: "No, I don't think you can ever have too much. I coulda had more." [Newsweek]
• And! When asked, "On a scale of 1 to 10 how much does Danielle annoy you?" Teresa answers: "20." [Newsweek]
• The stuff dreams are made of: James Franco reading Proust. [Page Six]
• Were Megan Fox and Josh Brolin involved in a New Orleans fire? [Page Six]
• Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo: Over. But those hot tub pix live forever! [People]
• Liev Schreiber plays a cross-dresser in Ang Lee's film Taking Woodstock and says: "[Ang] really did like my legs. When I went to his office, the first thing he said to me was, 'Wow, you have really nice legs.' I thought, 'This part is mine.'" [NY Mag]
• Pardon my groan: The Jonas Brothers are on the cover of Rolling Stone (again) looking like they bought fake IDs and are headed to the local leather bar to watch some bear on cub wrestling. [JustJared]
• "Martina Navratilova sued for millions by 'wife' after being 'dumped without warning.'" [Daily Mail]
• Katherine Heigl will star in a romance flick called Life As We Know It, which she is producing with her mother. [Variety]
• Daniel Craig will star in Dream House, a psychological thriller about a man who moves his family to a small town only to find it haunted by the former inhabitants who were murdered there. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Craig Robinson, Heather Graham, Johnny Knoxville and Camilla Belle will join Kevin Spacey in the comedy Father Of Invention, which Spacey is producing. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Julianne Hough probably won't be in Footloose, as her acting is abominable. [Page Six]
• Audrina Patridge of The Hills is getting her own reality show, creatively titled The Audrina Show. [EW]
• Epic Marilyn Manson interview! He talks about how he felt when he and Evan Rachel Wood broke up: "My walls were covered in scrawlings of the lyrics and cocaine bags nailed to the wall. And I did have an experience where I was struggling to deal with being alone and being forsaken and being betrayed by putting your trust in one person, and making the mistake of that being the wrong person. And that's a mistake that everyone can relate to. I made the mistake of trying to, desperately, grasp on and save that and own it. And every time I called her that day  I called 158 times  I took a razorblade and I cut myself on my face or on my hands." [Spin]
• Marilyn Manson also says of Evan Rachel Wood: "I have fantasies every day about smashing her skull in with a sledgehammer." [Spin]
• John Travolta is in South Africa, as a way to honor his late son who loved safaris. [TMZ]
• Is R. Kelly involved in a scam that robbed the elderly of £1million? [The Sun]
• Bollywood actress Aishwarya Rai is involved with some kind of illegal purchase of land, uh-oh. [Times of India]
• Michael Madsen owes Pierce Brosnan and Quentin Tarantino money. Not ten bucks  like $25,000 to Brosnan and $1 million to QT. [TMZ]
• "Rachel Hunter devastated as ice hockey player fiancé calls off wedding SEVEN WEEKS before big day." [Daily Mail]
• Come on baby shake your pigskin: Gloria Estefan and her husband Emilio are buying a share in the NFL's Miami Dolphins. [UPI]
• Joan Rivers is moving to L.A. and selling her Upper East side condo and Connecticut cottage, which is "so filled to the brim with campy knickknackery that it almost looks découpaged" and where Joan keeps a photograph of herself next to the bed. [NY Mag]
• Phil Spector is now in the "sensitive needs" area of California state prison, which is separate from the "gen pop." [USA Today]
• Blind item! "Which TV star will absolutely scream when she discovers her husband was chasing girls at an L.A. nightclub over the weekend?" [Gatecrasher]
• Q. Was it fun flipping the table? A: "Fun? It was heat of the moment and it was something that came spontaneously. That was my anger coming out. I just had enough of her. I was just done. I've never done it before. Will I ever do it again? I don't think so because I don't think I'll let someone get to me like she does because in real life I probably would have stopped hanging out with her."  Teresa, of The Real Housewives Of New Jersey. [Newsweek]
• "I'd be a liar if I said it was easy. I think it's very different nowadays for working mothers. Before, a woman could take two years off - a year for her pregnancy and then the first year, but I don't think that's possible for women in showbusiness or in any industry any more. You just have to keep going - keep looking forward. If you stop, you're like, 'Oh God, it's too overwhelming.' And believe me, I've had my fair share of those moments."  Anna Friel. [Telegraph]
• "I really cannot tell you if there will ever be another Batman movie. Chris [Nolan, director] has obviously done an incredible job with it. He's devoted to the movie that he's on right now. I'm none the wiser about we'll ever be revisiting Gotham or not."  Christian Bale. Of another Terminator movie he says: "No conversation has been had about that at all." [Pop Wrap]
• "That song is about when someone said to me, 'Okay, I want to be with you until I die.' And then they gave up. I was at the point in my life where I was like, 'Okay, let's die, but I tell you what, I'm going to kill you first, because I don't trust you.' Honestly. It's hard to look back and see myself as the same person. I'm very objective now. I started to apply this really fantastic rule that they don't teach you in AA or AAA, or any other acronym: Do drugs and drink when you're happy, not when you're sad. It has a great effect. But I can't say that I did that the whole time."  Marilyn Manson, still talking about Evan Rachel Wood. [Spin]
• "She's a lot shorter than I thought she would be, but I was pleased by that. I'm happy there was a flaw. Having said that, I think Angelina is pretty talented. And a remarkable human being, and a great mom. She's definitely not like any other lady I know."  Six foot three Liev Schreiber, on his five foot eight Salt costar Angelina Jolie. [Gatecrasher]
• "I did teach Abby how to say the f-word. I taught her how to drop the f-bomb in every way possible. I said, 'You're a child in an adult's world. I can't be a child for you. When she didn't swear, I said, 'You're starting to offend me Abby. If you don't start swearing every three words then I will fine you.'"  Cameron Diaz, 36 on working with Abigail Breslin, 13 in My Sister's Keeper. [Mirror]
• "I am so often puzzled [by journalists]. Sometimes they go, 'So what's this all about? ... What do you look like when you go home? Do you dress like this all the time?' It's rude! It's not nice… [Lady Gaga] is who I am. Me and my hair bow, we go to bed together. She sleeps where I sleep."  Lady GaGa. [Yahoo News via AP]

• VIP guests at Britney Spears' recent London gig weren't too happy when they discovered that Britney had declared the backstage to be a alcohol free area as a result of "her problems with alcohol." [TheSun]

• Phil Spector's wife, Rachelle, is now complaining about the conditions he's being forced to live in. "He's locked in a 5-by-9-foot cell 23½ hours a day," she says. "They treat people worse than animals. I want that known." [NYPost]
• Oh snap! Iggy Pop has singled out Billy Corgan and Fred Durst as the reasons why rock stars pretty much suck these days, calling them "idiot thugs with guitars making crappy music...Anyone from Smashing Pumpkins to - what's the one with Fred Durst?... There are a million billion of them. And people think they're gods, man. I took great pains not to think first because the thing I can't stand is a rock star who thinks he's got brains. They're always so damned dull!" [DailyExpress]
• Peter Jackson is finally making an appearance at ComicCon, in order to support his friend Neill Blomkamp's film District 9. He will most likely spend the entire time saying, "No, we haven't cast Bilbo yet, I swear!" [NYTimes]
• Lost star Emilie de Ravin is divorcing her husband, Josh Janowicz, after three years of marriage. [People]
• "As you can imagine, this is very hard. All together there were five of us that had the Carradine name. David had a lot of admiration for his father as an actor, and his mother he loved very dearly. We have all been close and we all love each other."-Bruce Carradine, on the death of his brother David. [USWeekly]
• Jay-Z released a new song, "Death Of The Autotune" on Hot97 last night. Sample lyric: "This ain't a No. 1 record/This is practically assault with a deadly weapon." R.I.P., Autotune? [HipHopGalaxy]
• Robert DeNiro is currently starring in commercials for...Subaru? [TimesOnline]
• Rosie O'Donnell says she's learned that screaming gets you nowhere: "I learned that when you yell, nobody hears you," she says, "The best communicators have to live and present themselves in a peaceful manner. And that's going to be a lifelong quest of mine." [CBSNews]
• "I love Perez! Like I think it's really cool that he asked that rad question at Miss America [he quizzed Miss California on gay marriage]. Once he put a picture of that blue catsuit I used to wear next to a Teletubbie, and I could have been like, 'You're an asshole.' But I thought it was really fucking funny."- Beth Ditto [Guardian]
• Universal has responded to allegations that Sacha Baron Cohen injured a woman on the set of Bruno by releasing this statement: "The allegations made by Richelle and Lance Olson in their complaint are completely baseless. Filmed footage of the full encounter, which took place more than two years ago, clearly shows that Ms. Olson was never touched or in any way assaulted by Sacha Baron Cohen or any member of the production and suffered no injury. If the Olsons elect to proceed with their frivolous action, we expect each of the defendants to be fully vindicated." [DeadlineHollywood]
• Looking forward to Whitney Houston's new album? This "sizzle reel" will get you even more excited. [Popbytes]
• Susan Boyle's brother says she's doing much better now that she's left The Priory: "She is much happier. She seems a lot more like herself," she says, "Things are becoming clearer for her now. She's now beginning to believe that, "Yes indeed, I will be a singer." [DailyMail]
• Emma Thompson says that Britain is falling behind the rest of the world in terms of the way they treat working mothers: "It depends where you are in the world. It's not brilliant here in Britain compared to, for example, Scandinavia – maternity leave and everything is different and they're much more clued in to what parents and children need," she says, "We still have quite a lot of Victorian principles hanging on, you can see it and feel it." [DailyExpress]
• Penn Badgely says he wants to star in a remake of Blade Runner. Cue the fanboy outrage! [DailyExpress]
• Jon and Kate Gosselin are speaking with divorce lawyers. Can't we all just get divorced from the both of them, please? [PageSix]
• James Franco and Robert Pattinson are reportedly fighting it out to play the lead in a Jeff Buckley biopic, which is dumb, as everyone knows that James is pretty much the spitting image of Jeff. So whatever, Sparkly Vampire! [ONTD]