Jezebel: j. mendel

The (Boozy) Bride Wore White: Planning Jenna Bush's Wedding

Jennifer — Wed, 30 Jan 2008 17:20:00 EST

So, Jenna Bush is getting married this spring (which is a totally gross, opportunistic way to distract the American public from the war, btw) and her mama, Laura, has commissioned the biggest names in American fashion to submit sketches for her darling daughter's big day. (Think Jenna will get sauced at the reception?) After the jump, check out sketches of the contenders, with comments, suggestions and (not so) gentle urgings. Here stumbles the bride!

1. Vera Wang: All I can think of when I see this is Chris and Christian (aka Team Fierce's) "avant-garde" look from Project Runway two weeks ago. It's way too trendy for Jenna and a Texas country wedding. This is a Southern sorority girl we're talking about, here.
2. J. Mendel: This tiered look screams "I'm pregnant and don't want daddy to know"!
3. Arnold Scaasi: Could this dress be any more old-school? Whatever Laura wore to marry Georgie Porgy probably looked a whole lot like this. (It's probably what his Barbara wore in her wedding to George, Sr. too.) Jenna may be a Republican, but she's not old. She needs contemporary conservative. Not to be confused, of course, with "compassionate conservative".
4. Carlos Miele: I can imagine Jenna in something like this; the strapless look is so traditional, and the bottom is full without being princess-y. (Jenna did teach children in South America; she's of the people!) One problem: Jenna's figure can come across as a little square, and this dress may not play up her curves.
5. Amsale: The girl can drink her Secret Service detail under the table. No way in hell is she going to wear a dress strewn with flowers.
6. Carmen Marc Valvo: Ooh, cool and modern without trying too hard; no avant-garde aspirations. Just stylish. And thus, possibly too good for Jenna. (See: Southern sorority girl, drinks like a fish, above.)
7. Angel Sanchez: Interesting detailing in the front, but those spaghetti straps won't be doing Jenna any favors. Pass.
8. Badgley Mischka: We have a winner! This dress has traditional styling, old-school glamour, romance, and class. And the White House can use all the class it can spin.
9. Nicole Miller: The bustle in the back, draping across the front, and underlayers peeking out look old-fashioned, but not in a cool, vintage way. Too dated for an all-American party girl.
10. Lela Rose: The scoop neck is unexpected and modern, but it just might be a little too fashion-forward for the stiff-necked blueblood Bush clan.
11. Marc Bouwer: This shape might have looked good when Audrey Hepburn played Eliza Doolittle, but Jenna Bush, my friends, is no Audrey Hepburn. (Or John Kennedy.)
12. Oscar de la Renta: Strikingly similar to the Badgley Mischka gown, this one is a teensy bit more sophisticated. And Jenna Bush just doesn't scream "sophistication."

Jenna Bush Wedding Dress Selections [StyleScoop]

Fake WASP Tory Burch Designs Collection "Inspired" By Fake WASP Martha Stewart

Jennifer — Wed, 14 Nov 2007 12:00:00 EST

Tory Burch is designing a line inspired by old pictures of Martha Stewart, back from when Martha Stewart looked sort of like a pretty version of Tory Burch. [As I'm sure you can imagine, Jennie, who loves both WASPs and fashion-pop culture collabos like the proverbial fat kid loves cake, is in a corner somewhere heaving in ecstasy. Hey Jennie, Ralph Lauren called, and he's got a message for you! "I Am Your Father." -Moe] [Fashion Week Daily]
Ever wondered how Miuccia Prada transported herself from office to car in those heels? A giant slide. Sort of what you'd expect, but whoa. [Sassybella]
Vivienne Westwood, Luella Bartley and others are designing dresses inspired by the Disney princesses as part of the celebration of Euro Disney's 15th anniversary. The dresses will be auctioned off with proceeds going to UNICEF, which is the part you should focus on, as opposed to whatever the fuck the guy who drops a few hundred grand on a Westwood-designed Ariel gown will actually be doing with it. [FemaleFirst]

J. Mendel designer Gilles Mendel has a band called Born Again Baldwins. Um, quirky? [WWD, 2nd item]
We love Julianne Moore. Which is why we're not exactly thrilled to bring you the news that Vogue sponsored the reading she held for her children's book Freckleface Ball yesterday, at the Hogan store. [WWD, 3rd item]
M.A.C. raised $100 million in funds for the M.A.C. AIDS Foundation! Wait, you mean to tell us fashion does actually give back? [Fashion Week Daily]
What has Elizabeth Hurley been up to? "I'm still working on my bikini line, but I've also started to work on my organic farming." Of course she has. [Fashion Week Daily]
Don't you just hate when the claim that your overpriced line of yoga wear is made from seaweed turns out not to be true? [NYT]
Tiffany's is after eBay, saying it is not doing anything to crack down on sellers of counterfeit Tiffany's baubles. [WSJ]
Burberry profits are up 31%. They credit "accessories" which is investor relations speak for "accessibly priced crap that comes in that signature plaid, duh." [FT]
Says fashion designer/sister of fashion photographer Mario Testino of the strong creative genes in their family: "I have a brother in Paris who works with Mario, a sister in New York who is an interior designer, another sister in Peru who designs jewellery but also works with Mario - in fact we all do a bit - we're his slaves!" Um, nevermind. Not strong genes. Strong chains. [Vogue UK]
Prada. Limited edition. Keychains. Design taken from Prada archives from the '30's. Also, teddy bears. [Vogue UK]

J. Mendel Spring/Summer '08 Show & Scene

Anna — Sat, 08 Sep 2007 14:15:00 EDT

(Click on any picture to see entire gallery)

Christina Ricci Not Aware Of The Difference Between A Suitcase And An Evening Gown

Jennifer — Tue, 21 Aug 2007 10:00:00 EDT

Christina Ricci, the face of the re-launched Samsonite Fashionaire collection, gave some bullshit answer at the line's launch party about how fashion is art, blah blah blah. At this point we would like to remind Christina that she's not shilling fashion. She's shilling luggage. [Vogue UK]
In the words of Yogurt from Spaceballs: Merchandising! Merchandising! Merchandising! Now Project Runway has caught the bug and has forged a licensing deal with everything from sewing machine to textile manufacturers to throw the Project Runway logo on their goods. [NY Post]
Badgley Mischka are debuting a daytime dress collection this fall at a much less expensive price point than their signature eveningwear collection. This is still not enough for us to forgive them for the whole Teri Hatcher thing. [WWD, sub req'd]

Having just now gotten past their faux pas of wearing Italian designer Prada to husband French President Nicolas Sarkozy's inaugration a few months ago, France's new first family is now in trouble for vacationing in Connecticut and shopping at the Ralph Lauren store in that most all-American of cities, Boston. [WWD, 1st item]
In Japan, clothing boutiques and art galleries are becoming one. Which sorta makes perfect sense, since both hock expensive shit whose purchase can only be rationalized through pseudo-intellectual rantings on aesthetics. [WWD, sub req'd]
Infinitely better designed than the Kate Moss line is the Celia Birtwell line for Topshop, in stores and available online this week. [Vogue UK]
Tom Ford: Not just misogynistic, but passive-aggressive too! The asshole designer will host a party for photographer Marilyn Minter celebrating her work the day before New York Fashion Week begins. Even though he uh, fired Minter from being the one to shoot the Tom Ford for Men advertising campaign. [Fashion Week Daily]