• Courtney Love, who recently lost custody of Frances Bean Cobain, posted two incoherent rants on her Facebook page today, bashing Kurt Cobain's family and her 17-year-old daughter. She says Frances "was deceptive she lied and shes lying to herself."

She continues, "frankly the whole thing disgusts my daihgter is not always honest and ive alliwed her to visit with these assholes i support to the tune of houses horses and monthly annuities and cars, well the good news is now that frances is clearly deluded that she can buy her grandmaother a 'small house in la' id love to see how that works." She goes on to insult members of the Cobain family who have been named Frances' guardians saying, "well im going out with ms palmer and ms kirke and frances have fun on your covers of the tabs, thats what your wonder bread side likes, you couldve asked for emanicaption youc ouldve gone to simons rock, but you have to get involved with that terrifying not to me, to you witch who keeps britney spars in jail? thats insane. you realie this will put you in juvenoile fami;y circus three times in your little life? this is what along with his mother killed your father..." [Perez Hilton]

• Now that a judge has shut down Jon Gosselin's TV career, he's running out of money and the bills are stacking up. "Jon's in pretty serious financial trouble because his plan for making money was shut down in court," said a source. "He has warned his lawyers that he can't pay them and if he doesn't succeed against TLC, he will have no funds. He's even gone so far as to say that if they want to be paid, they will have to sue him." The insider adds that it's time for Jon to get a real job, but he's making no effort to do so. [Fox News]
• It's too bad that Lindsay Lohan wasn't in court today — a judge gave her high marks for complying with the terms of her DUI probation. [TMZ]
• According to a police report, Erin Muller says she's afraid her ex Michael Lohan "will do bad things to me and my family" because he called her on Sunday morning and "started harassing me, questioning me who I have 'been with, who's car was currently in my drive way,' things like that." He called her twice and she recorded both conversations. An embarrassing leak to the press would only be fair. [TMZ]
• A-Rod's friend says he broke up with Kate Hudson because of the way she behaved at Yankees games. "[Hudson] wanted more camera time each and every game," said the source. "She would always want to be styled before games and she'd insist on front-row seats... It was a turnoff to have a girlfriend who always wanted to be on camera. Alex wanted someone who was more interested in building a long-term relationship than just building their profile." [Us]
• Michael David Barrett plead guilty to stalking Erin Andrews today. Before he entered his plea Andrews told the court, "I have nightmares about the sexual predator. I hope he never sees the light of day so no one else has to deal with this." [TMZ]
• It was a busy day at Tiger Woods' house. Art was taken from the home in a moving van and workers showed up, possibly to repair damage in the vestibule that resulted from Tiger's Thanksgiving fight with his wife. [TMZ]
• Elin Nordegren took her two children with her to a lunch meeting at a restaurant. She told the paparazzi (who were screaming at her, no doubt) that her kids are "doing just fine." An eyewitness says, "She looks bone-thin... And her conversation with the other adults was very intense, especially in comparison to smiling little Sam and Charlie." [Ok]
• Nike chairman and co-founder Phil Knight says of Tiger Woods, "When his career is over, you'll look back on these indiscretions as a minor blip, but the media is making a big deal out of it right now." [Us]
• Sources say Tiger Woods' latest mistress Theresa Rogers "was crazy about Tiger but she didn't want to feel like a bought woman, a paid escort. She just wanted to be the woman who schooled Tiger in the bedroom... She bragged, 'I taught him everything he needed to know to be a great lover!'" [Radar Online]
• Tiger Woods offered to buy his "porn star mistress" Joslyn James a house, according to her sister. "She told me once that Tiger Woods was going to buy her a house in Las Vegas and that she had seen him many times," said Samantha Siwik. "I believe that my sister took advantage of him because I know that she is that kind of person – she only thinks about herself. It would not have bothered her that he was married she would wanted to get all that she could from him." [Radar Online]
• Amy Winehouse's father Mitch Winehouse insists she has not reunited with Blake Fielder-Civil, even though she spent two days at his apartment last week. "Don't believe all that you read! I am not going to comment on Amy's trip to see Blake, except to say this guy who purports to love Amy, the next day, sold an exclusive to The Sun," said Mitch. "He has a funny way of showing his love. Nice earner though - 5k at least. It sits beside other betrayals; selling Amy's letters to the papers, videoing her when he said camera was off etc. So why [do the newspapers] give this liar, violent criminal and betrayer the time of day?" [Daily Express]
• Sacha Baron Cohen and Isla Fisher have reportedly decided to get married in May or June. "Isla and Sacha want a small wedding that will include only family and their closet friends - possibly fewer than 50 people," says a source. [Daily Express]
• Richard Perry says the rumors that he and Jane Fonda are engaged aren't true. "She thinks it's a bit too soon [to marry], and no doubt, she's right, although I said from the beginning we should make our relationship a priority," he said, adding, "Sometimes the thought pops into my head that Jane will organise a wedding as a wonderful surprise for me." [Daily Express]
• At the Nobel Peace Prize after party Toby Keith slanted his eyes while Will Smith rapped the word "yellow" in "Rapper's Delight." His rep says: "No one at the concert thought Toby was out of line. Everyone was impressed with his rapping skills and that's it ... all of the artists liked each other, hung out, and it was a very friendly, genuine, and supportive atmosphere." [TMZ]
• Barry Williams, who played Greg Brady on The Brady Bunch, obtained a restraining order against his ex-girlfriend Elizabeth Kennedy because he claims she once pulled a knife on him and, "I know that she will definitely try to harm me once she is aware that our relationship is now over." [TMZ]
• Randy and Evi Quaid failed to show up for yet another court date today so a judge issued $40,000 arrest warrants for both of them. [Radar Online]
• Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi of Jersey Shore says getting punched in the face wasn't all bad. "A positive came out of it," said Snooki. "It definitely brought [the cast] closer together. It definitely brought us together as a family. We have each other's backs and it was a positive." [People]
• Meredith Baxter, who recently came out, will be writing a memoir about "her life as an actress, mother of five children, and grandmother, and will candidly discuss her fight with breast cancer, her 19 years of sobriety, entrepreneurship, and her decision to come out." [N.Y.T.]
• The House unanimously passed a resolution recognizing the 50th anniversary of Miles Davis recording "Kind of Blue." [AP]
• Abba, Genesis, Jimmy Cliff, The Hollies, and The Stooges will be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame next year. Kiss was nominated for the first time but wasn't selected this year. [N.Y.T.]
• American Idol winner Kris Allen says of Adam Lambert's recent racy performance, "Yeah, that's who he is... Obviously, he couldn't do that stuff on Idol. And so you're getting to see the real Adam now." [People]
• Brian Setzer was hospitalized last night after he collapsed during a concert in New Mexico. His rep says he was suffering from "a combination of dehydration, high altitude, and vertigo," but he's completely recovered and will perform tonight. [TMZ]
• Robin Thicke, whose latest album is titled Sex Therapy, says his wife Paula Patton is "my sex therapist." [Us]
• After hearing that he's up for Best Dramatic Actor at the Golden Globes this year Colin Firth said, "The Hollywood Foreign Press have just given me time out from my 20 year midlife crisis - my heartfelt thanks to them." [The Mirror]
• Sandra Bullock says of receiving two Golden Globe nominations, "I am beyond stunned. Just to be included in the company of these amazing women I have so admired through the years has left me slack-jawed with awe." [People]
• "Not that I have a husband to have one with yet, but someday I'd like a family – not a big one, but not a small one either," says Carrie Underwood. "Two kids is good; three is fine. Four? Somebody's getting something done, because we ain't having five!" [People]
• Q: In one sentence, what do you actually do all day in your job? Kristen Johnston: "Try to stay sane." [New York]
• Q: What do you do when you come to New York? Wilford Brimley: "Well, we eat good food in good restaurants. You've got the best food in the world here. And I visit friends that mean a whole lot to me. You know, we live on a ranch in a small Wyoming town. We don't live on Mars." [New York]
• Alanis Morissette used to be depressed, but she told Runner's World, "running has made being depressed impossible. If I'm going through something emotional and just go outside for a run, you can rest assured I'll come back with clarity." Also helpful: "Red wine, and it's fun to have medical marijuana once in a while." [People]
• Teresa Giudice of RHONJ Tweeted about RHONY star Bethenny Frankel's nude PETA ad, "To quote Bethenny: 'I just threw up a little in my mouth." She continued, "Help me understand this. Bethenny is happy with her naked pic because she was 'already pregnant' at the time. She says she's now three months along, but she did the shot in August. Even if she's four months pregnant now, she would've been, like, one hour pregnant in the pic... Someone tell Bethenny that sperm does not make you look fat, and I'm not buying the airbrushing thing in any case." [Us]

• Today a judge ruled that Jon Gosselin must pay back $180,000 of the money he removed from his shared bank account with Kate Gosselin in violation of an arbitrator's order. As for the rest of the money...

• Kate's lawyer said, "The remaining sum of $55,000, which Ms. Gosselin used for household bills and expenses relating to the children, will be subject to further determination by the arbitrator at a later date." Jon has to pay by October 26 or be held in contempt. Kate has until that date to detail what she's been spending the money on. [TMZ]
• Lindsay Lohan Tweeted: "@samantharonson doesn't respond 2me b/c her family will cut her off if she contacts me…They control the one I love & im incapable of making any sort of difference. I'm in love with her, as she is in love with me….but her loved ones-hate her brilliance & resent her happiness" [Perez Hilton]
• In the video at the link, a Dallas news anchor asks Oprah, "Would you like to take this opportunity to apologize to America for introducing us to Dr. Phil?" She laughs and says, "Aren't you proud of your boy from Texas?" to which the anchor replies, "No." [TMZ]
• Michael Jackson was nominated for five American Music Awards today. His death made him the biggest-selling artist of the year and he was nominated for favorite male artist and favorite album for Number Ones. [Reuters]
• Sources who have heard unreleased Michael Jackson recordings say there are at least two albums worth of material, and some are better than "This Is It." [TMZ]
• Helen Harris-Scott, who once claimed Michael Jackson communicated with her through his music, has filed a creditor's claim for $50 million. She says Michael installed a tracking device in her car, wiretapped her phone and had "organized criminals watching me inside my house in L.A. and reporting to him." [TMZ]
• Robert O'Ryan, Shawn Johnson's alleged stalker, will stand trial for felony stalking, felony commercial burglary and two misdemeanor counts of carrying a loaded firearm in his car. A judge threw out an attempted kidnapping charge because although he had zip ties, duct tape, and a shot gun in his car the judge said there was so much junk in the vehicle that he could not have fit Johnson inside. [TMZ]
• Deputy James Davis, the police officer who arrested Evi Quaid and Randy Quaid, is suing her because she was photographed hanging a hand painted sign accusing him of taking bribes outsider her home. Now another sign has appeared that accuses him of being a "Deputy with Underrated Intelligence." [TMZ]
• NBC has cancelled Southland, but TNT may pick it up. [Hollywood Reporter]
• A Richard Prince exhibition has reopened at the Tate Modern in London after a nude photo of Brooke Shields when she was 10-years-old was removed for possibly violating obscenity laws. Prince was consulted and the picture was replaced with a photo of Shields as an adult. [N.Y. Times]
• The first witness in the preliminary hearing over Anna Nicole Smith's death testified today that she was found with a bottle of the anti-biotic Cipro and a baby bottle full of Pedialyte, which is used to rehydrate children who have diarrhea and vomiting. Anna had the flu. [TMZ]
• The paparazzi caught Maria Shriver talking on a cell phone while driving, which was outlawed by a bill Arnold Schwarzenegger signed last year. [TMZ]
• Paparazzi caught Famke Jannsen with feeding her dog while dining on the patio of a New York restaurant. In New York it is illegal to bring a dog into a restaurant. [TMZ]
• The cover of Q magazine featuring a topless Lily Allen with panthers won a Maggie for the best UK magazine cover of the year. [Guardian]
• Lily Allen is preparing to move in with her new boyfriend Sam Cooper, who is a builder. "They have made enquiries about several terraced properties in Primrose Hill in London," says a source. "Sam's brilliant at planning and design so it makes sense for him to advise on any business ventures. They're so into each other, it's very sweet." [Ok]
• Though they've only been dating for a few weeks Katy Perry wants to introduce Russell Brand to her parents. "Katy is as besotted with Russell as he is with her. However, her parents are extraordinarily strict Christians," says a source. "Katy is sure that, after a bit of getting used to him, they would approve of Russell, but she wants to get that initial meeting out of the way as early as she can." [The Sun]
• Isla Fisher and Sacha Baron Cohen saved a lost dog they saw other drivers swerving around in Los Angeles. Sacha called the owners to set up a meeting and said he'd recognize them because, "I'm very tall and my fiancée is really tiny. You can't miss us." [E!]
• PETA is attacking Paris Hilton for buying a pet mini-pig recently, saying she sets a "wretched example" by treating animals like they're "as disposable as her friends and fiances." [TMZ]
• Karina Smirnoff says the rumors she's hooking up with her Dancing With the Stars partner Aaron Carter are "really funny" because judge Len Goodman keeps accusing them of not being sexy enough on the dance floor. "Let me tell you, if that was the case, the dance would have been very raunchy, as Len wanted it to be," she said. [People]
• The autopsy of Boyzone star Stephen Gately, who was found dead on Saturday, shows he died of natural causes. [USA Today]
• Ethan Hawke is on the new cover of Hobo magazine, sitting on a swing looking scruffy and dejected. [Just Jared]
• Tilda Swinton is trying to prevent Donald Trump from developing a golf course in Scotland. He responded: "Where was Tilda Swinton three years ago when everyone else was petitioning? She's a little late in the game don't you think? Swinton is a part of a tiny little group of people who are hanging by a thread. 93% of the public in Scotland are in favor of the project. I have all of my permits and approvals and we're going to start construction in 3 weeks." [TMZ]
• Heidi Klum says she and Seal won't be having any more kids after their new daughter Lou Sulola. "I think that it's a wonderful experience to be pregnant, definitely, but you have to look at what you can do, and four children is a lot!" she said. "It's a big family. We drive a really big VW bus. Now in September, all three children will be going to school. Try to fit three car seats in the back of the car!" [People]
• T.R. Knight told Ellen DeGeneres, "I want a baby... I don't know if it's going to end up working out, but that would be something I would like." [Us]
• Former Spice Girl Emma Bunton's two-year-old son Beau was taken to the hospital last week because he had a bloody lip. Bunton says, "It's been an emotional week for me as Beau had his first accident, which left both of us in tears. He fell over his scooter and his tooth pierced his bottom lip, so there was blood everywhere." He was sent home the same day. [Daily Express]
• Claire Danes says she likes to walk across the Brooklyn Bridge but has never ventured much further into the borough. "That's terrible. I sound terrible," she said. Her husband Hugh Dancy added, "Basically, you're speaking to the most politely pro-Manhattanite person that you've ever met, right here." [N.Y. Magazine]
• "They've turned the word rock into nothing. It's a meaningless word. "It rocks." "That food rocks." "She's rocking in that outfit." They've taken the word and stripped it of all its menace, of all its dirt, of all its sex." — Joan Jett [Esquire]
• Jane Birkin says Serge Gainsbourg "was scared stiff of all breasts. Which was why, when he met me, he said: 'Wow – you have a body just like the ones I drew in art school.' He didn't like bosoms to be high and pert; he liked them lower down, which was just as well, as I'd had a baby. 'I've always dreamt of a girl who had the top of a boy and the bottom of a girl,' he once told me – Serge did like a bottom." [The Telegraph]
• Sharon Stone says she likes the men of old Hollywood like William Powell and Spencer Tracy because, "They're chivalrous and funny and not too politically correct. They still smack a gal on the ass, which I just think is swell. They wear a suit, they have a hat, they drive a car, they have a job. They stand up when you come in the room, say please and thank you. All those old fashioned things go a long way with me." [Showbiz 411]

Christina Applegate: Sleek, basic, body-conscious black. Safe? Sure. But also classy.

I'm not a huge fan of Isla Fisher's pleated leather skirt, but she looks comfortable and cool.

Remember when Katharine McPhee was a brunette who wore pretty dresses? Now she's a blonde in liquid leggings. Downgrade.

More liquid leggings… But since Jillian Michaels looks prepared to kick my ass, I'll shut up.

Not sure about the vest, but I love Sheryl Crow's punky plaid pants.

Alanis Morissette's basic black stays interesting with a drapey neckline.

I'm probably one of the few fools who actually watched the Disney Channel original movie Gotta Kick It Up!, in which Camille Guaty starred — it's about Latina teens on a dance squad, and I do not recommend it. But call me crazy: I think wearing a tiger tee to a rock event is okay.

Marcia Cross looks dramatic in black, what with the flawless, pale skin and fiery hair, but the neckbow on that top is a No.

I like Courteney Cox's easy purple shift dress, but someone should have told her that when she puts her hands in her pockets it looks like she's about to announce an Unsolicited Uterus Update.

Jenna Dewan, aka Nora in Step Up, aka Mrs. Channing Tatum, chose regular leggings over liquid leggings and a tunic made from birthday present gift wrap.

Dear Lance Bass: It appears that your jacket does not fit, and you're trying to fake it by wearing it open, with the sleeves pushed up. I know this trick, because I have done it before. That is all.

Jimmy Jean-Louis is a Haitian actor known for his character — creatively called "The Haitian" — on Heroes. He is also very handsome, very dapper, and, sadly, overdressed for this event. Or maybe everyone else is underdressed? Don't change a thing, Mr. Jean-Louis. We love you just the way you are.

Lisa Kudrow has made some bad choices. Namely: That jacket with that T-shirt, those pants and those shoes.

[Images via Getty.]

[Los Angeles, July 15. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

Do you think Sacha Baron Cohen is a method actor and Isla Fisher has to actually live with Bruno, or Borat, or Ali G for months at a time? At the very least, she and Olive are living with the Peter Pan hair. Maybe this dress is her revenge.


The summer of 2009 will see everyone with random strips of geometric tan on their chests and stomachs. If you must do it, though, Rosario Dawson shows how.


Is Christina Ricci's auburn hair for a role? What say you about her LBD? (LGD?)


Gotta say: Stephanie Pratt's mini may be undistinguished, but it does bring out her eyes! Her mom would be happy. Maybe.


Sarah Chalke, for whatever reason, stirs strong passions amongst viewers. I wonder what you will think of her rather unexciting - but inoffensive! - frock?


Krysten Ritter's taffeta is giving me bad birthday party flashbacks. And her eyes are following me. None of this is any refection on the dress itself.


Not my favorite look on Mindy Kaling, but digging the specs - and hey, maybe it's a Michael Jackson tribute.


And in case you were wondering...heeeeere's Bruno! (Yes, speaking of tributes, that was for Ed.)


Images via Getty

• Ryan Seacrest and Lindsay Lohan are joining forces to create a reality show wherein people who are "on the wrong track" plead their cases for a second chance and are given 1 million dollars to start their lives over. [USWeekly]

• Both Seacrest and Lohan discussed the show on their Twitter pages: "Met with Lindsay last night about a show idea I have for her…it helps people and gives others a second shot!" wrote Ryan, while Lindsay wrote: "Working on a really great project for television — I am excited!" she wrote. "Something meaningful like Extreme Home Makeover on ABC… :)" [USWeekly]
• David Duchovny and Tea Leoni are "still in love," says a source, despite a rocky patch the couple hit due to Duchovny's struggle with sex addiction last fall. "Their first priority through everything was staying close for their kids and making life as great as it can be for them," the source says, "They'll always be a family." [People]
• The Proposal topped the box office on Friday with 12.4 million dollars. Think it was thoseRyan Reynolds covers? [EW]
• Emma Watson plans to release her own fashion line for teens, and a source says she's "been getting advice from her fashion designer pals like Karl Lagerfeld." [NewsOfTheWorld]
• Orlando Magic star Dwight Howard will star in a movie called Switch, which will reportedly also star Snoop Dogg, Kanye West, and Chris Tucker [PageSix]
• Madonna has now been reunited with her newly adopted daughter, Mercy James, who flew into London yesterday.[DailyMail]
• Approximately 1,000 fans lined up to hear Lauren Conrad read from her novel, LA Candy. 999 of those fans were MFAs who just needed a reason to cry. [NBCNews]
• Sacha Baron Cohen and Isla Fisher are too busy with their careers to plan a wedding. "With all their projects, Isla and Sacha haven't had time to tie the knot," says a source. [DailyMail]
• Kristen Stewart has reportedly been calling Robert Pattinson on the set of his new film, Remember Me. "Kristen's been calling him nonstop since he's been in New York and gets uneasy when he doesn't answer," says a source. "She's nervous he'll fall for Emilie [de Ravin]. She thinks it's only a matter of time before he hooks up with another girl." [ShowbizSpy]
• "I've been in the public eye since I was 14, so I have a tough skin. It's fine dragging me through the mud, but don't drag my loved ones through it. They're my family, and it hurts them. All I'll say is, I know what's in my heart and what's true."- LeAnn Rimes[People]
• Did Victoria Beckham get her breast implants removed so she could appear on the cover of Vogue? A source says yes: "Anna said she would consider putting Victoria on the cover, but told her to lose those ridiculous implants before it happened." [DailyMail]
• "Talking about how all women age, we all see ourselves one way, we all want to stay where we were when we felt our best, but, of course, we do change. If you try to hold on to something that's passed, you get into trouble. It's very sad when people are unhappy because they are not grateful for what they have."-Cameron Diaz [TimesOnline]
• Blind Item: "Which upcoming starlet has been told to keep a lid on her God-fearing, clean-living lifestyle by her management team? Apparently, they think having an out-of-control client will be better for the books." [BlindGossip]
• Is Amy Winehouse going to become a permanent resident of St. Lucia? "Amy loves St Lucia and never wants to leave," says a source, "She thinks the island has done her the world of good and she's writing more than ever." [NewsOfTheWorld]
• Totally ridiculous Brangelaniston story of the day: Angelina Jolie is mad at Brad Pitt for talking to Jennifer Aniston, so she's started talking to Billy Bob Thornton again: "Angelina was beside herself with rage over Brad's latest date with Jen, which left her humiliated and feeling like a laughing stock," says a source, "she has been giving Brad a dose of his own medicine by getting hot and heavy with Billy Bob. Brad recently walked in on Angie, naked in the bathtub, drinking wine and in deep intimate conversation with Billy Bob on the phone!" OMG, I can't wait to tell my boyfriend, Cillian Murphy, who is sitting here next to me. I hope he doesn't get mad at me! If he does, I'll just have to call my other boyfriend, Ewan McGregor, while I'm in the bathtub. See how easy it is to make this stuff up? Everything I just wrote is true, though. Don't tell my husband, Christian Bale. He's quite unpleasant when he's angry. [ShowbizSpy]

[Los Angeles, May 12. Image via WENN]

• Thanks to the tipsters who let us know that Chris Brown was hanging out at their school, the University of Mary Washington earlier this week, and that his visit was very poorly timed.

• Chris Brown was spotted playing basketball in the school's gym. What's really ironic/disturbing is that it happened to be in the middle of The White Ribbon Campaign, a week devoted to raising awareness about violence towards women. [TMZ]
• Rihanna snuck out of L.A. unnoticed and is now in Hawaii and getting back to work. [TMZ]
• Sam Lutfi's sister Christina testified in court today that she slipped Britney Spears a cell phone at her request because Jamie Spears won't let her use the phone. "[Britney] told me she wanted to get a hold of Sam," said Christina. "She wanted him to help her find a lawyer, and wanted someone to get a prepaid cell phone to her. She was scared because her father was blackmailing her with visitation rights over her kids." Brit's security confiscated the phone. [People]
• These court documents show that Britney Spears' attorney guaranteed that if Britney flakes out and can't finish the Circus tour, he'll pay $1.5 million to vendors. [TMZ]
• A man claiming to be Beyonce's manager tried to push his way into Jamie Foxx's hotel room on March 22. Foxx fended him off, but his security team spotted him today and he was arrested for burglary, criminal threats, stalking, false imprisonment and harassment. [Perez Hilton]
• Government officials in Malawi are backing Madonna's adoption of four-year-old Mercy James. "She is supporting over 25,000 orphans in this country and she has proved that she can take care of David. Very few rich and famous people can take time to fly all the way to Malawi to support our children. We support her adoption process," says Minister Patricia Kaliati. [The Daily Express]
• Ryan Seacrest interviewed Miley Cyrus about her 20-year-old boyfriend, Justin Gaston. He asked, "has your dad not said to you, he's a little too old?" "No," Miley said. He also asked, "Do you think you'll marry your Justin?" to which she said, "If he gets a pretty ring." [RyanSeacrest.com]
• Everyone thought Michael Vick would return to football once he got out of prison, but he has other ideas. He has a construction job lined up and will work a regular 40 hour week. [TMZ]
• There's a rumor that Lindsay Lohan is on a liquid diet and drinks three Red Bulls a day. Her rep says, "Lindsay has always enjoyed a Red Bull, but she eats. Everybody needs to mind their own business and stop worrying about what Lindsay eats or doesn't eat." [People]
• Dina Lohan tried to take her daughters Lindsay and Ali clubbing, but were turned away because Ali is only 15. Dina reported screamed, "Do you know who I am?" when they weren't let in. [Celeb News Wire]
• Lindsay Lohan had yet another nipple slip. [Egotastic]
• Shanna Moakler says she isn't breaking up with Travis Barker because she was having an affair with Gerard Butler, but because Barker was cheating on her. She says after his plane crash, "Not only did I fly to Georgia, I stayed by his side the entire stay and also for the bus ride home... After arriving in L.A. and getting settled in the new hospital, I came across numerous romantic emails with MANY other woman, some famous, some I personally knew - all heartbreaking." [Star]
• Maya Soetoro-Ng, Barack Obama's sister, has a book deal. The book is called Ladder to the Moon and is about what lesson's her four-year-old daughter might have learned from her mother, had she lived. [Politico]
• Last night Mickey Rourke carried an open beer out of a restaurant in Hollywood. [TMZ]
• Tommy Lee has a profile on a dating website for millionaire, but he says "d33pthr0at" is an impostor. In real life he's dating one of the contestants from Paris Hilton's My New BFF. [TMZ]
• Isla Fisher and Courteney Cox had tea together yesterday and brought their daughters along. [Pop Sugar]
• Mark your calendar and cancel all you appointments: the Sex and the City sequel will come out on May 28th 2010. [Perez Hilton]
• Charlie Sheen says one of his twins does not have a heart condition. His rep said: "Charlie and Brooke's infant son remains in the hospital, not because of a heart condition as reported, but because he has not gained the weight necessary to leave hospital. Max is expected to reach the weight requirement shortly and will join his brother [Bob] at home." [Star]
• But now Entertainment Tonight is insisting that the baby does have a heart condition, but is in the hospital because of his low birth weight. [Entertainment Tonight]
• Zooey Deschanel would like to point out that she's not Katy Perry. "It's a little bit annoying, to be totally blunt. The only similarity that we have is that we look a bit alike," said Deschanel. [Perez Hilton]
• Natasha Bedingfield wants you to know that her honeymoon is going well. She says that though you "don't need another half to make me whole...having an 'other half' definitely makes my life a 'whole' lot more fun." [People]
• David Foster, says Clay Aiken is a great father to his sister Jaymes' baby. He says their relationship works because, "she's very close with Clay, they're best friends ... It made perfect sense to me that he'd want to have a child with his best friend." [Entertainment Tonight]
• Jennifer Hudson says her fans don't have to feel responsible for her. She says: "The other day this lady came up to me and got really close to me," she recalls, "and I thought, 'What is it that makes people want to ... embrace me?' I don't like it when people get all emotional. I don't want you to cry." [People]

• On the red carpet at a fundraiser a reporter touched Hayden Panettiere's shoulder. She screamed, "Don't you ever touch me!" and told the rest of the press, "You all make my life miserable." [Us]

• Jimmy Kimmel went on The View dressed as Rosie O'Donnell and the ladies asked him why Sarah Silverman broke up with him. Jimmy said, "What do you mean, what happened? Look at me. What do you think happened? I'm a 41-year-old man with a bra filled with Koosh balls. I'm an imbecile. She couldn't date an imbecile anymore." [Star]
• In this video from December, Chris Brown jokes with a DJ about "island girls" being feisty. But don't worry, Chris says he and Rihanna don't fight because if she started arguing with him, he'd just "laugh it off and walk away." Chris adds, "I ain't the fightin' type." [TMZ]
• Jade Goody, the British reality star who has cancer, woke up in her hospital bed to find a woman looming over her with a hammer. The woman was taken into police custody and Goody is uninjured. [UPI]
• Sources say Megan Fox and Robert Pattinson had secret rendez-ous at a West Hollywood hotel last week. [ONTD]
• Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are planning a camping trip across the U.S. They'll sleep in a tent, but unlike most campers they are taking their Scientologist friend with them and will have security camped down the road to keep away "to keep any unwelcome people at bay." [Newser]
• Doug Reinhardt gave Paris Hilton a a baby teacup Pomeranian for her birthday for her birthday. "He probably got me more presents than any guy ever," said Paris. [People]
• On Sunday Metallica cancelled a concert in Stockholm minutes before it was set to start because singer James Hetfield had to be hospitalized for a stomach bug and dehydration. [AP]
• Christina Ricci says she's a fan of the paparazzi because she feels no one would attack her while she has a gang of paparazzi with her. Also, one helped her get a snake out of her driveway. [The Daily Express]
• British newspaper The Sun is apologizing to Isla Fisher for claiming she had plastic surgery (which she has not). [The Sun]
• If you were dying to know what Samantha Ronson thinks about Coolio's recent arrest at LAX for crack possession, here you go: "The thing that baffles me most is the fact that you can't even smoke on planes anyway... if you're gonna be an idiot and do drugs - I guess I should just stop there - if you're dumb enough to do drugs then you're probably not thinking about much else ..." [The Daily Express]
• In this video, Miley Cyrus is asked what she would call Justin Gaston, since she already calls an ex-boyfriend "Prince Charming" in her autobiography. "Probably just Justin," said Miley. "Because he's perfect." [E!]
• Mariska Hargitay underwent a second surgery last week for a collapsed lung. She's going to miss one episode of Law and Order: Special Victims Unit because she's still recovering. [Entertainment Weekly]
• "Drew is going to surprise a lot of people. Little Edie is such a huge role, and people are not accustomed to seeing the depth of Drew's capacity for drama." - Jessica Lange on co-star Drew Barrymore's performance in Grey Gardens. [W Magazine]
• Paul Rudd and Jason Segel were pretending to flirt with each other at the screening of their new movie I Love You, Man. When asked about the quality he looks for most in a man, Rudd said "height"; while the 6 foot, 4 inch Segal said said "extreme shortness." Rudd replied: "You are a gem." [WWD]

[Los Angeles, March 6. Image via Flynet]

[Los Angeles, March 4. Image via INF]

The Good:
I was on the fence about Isla Fisher's mini - I'd probably have done a different shoe and, let's face it, maybe tights - but her vintage clutch somehow pulls the whole thing together.


I'm not, as a rule, boy crazy. But I am a Hugh Dancy girl. And this dates from seeing him play a ravaged WWI officer on Broadway, because I'm high-brow like that, although in fairness it was his work in The Jane Austen Book Club that cemented my love. Long story short: he is very handsome.


Sarah Cawood's getup may be costumey, but as we know, that's not always a bad thing!


The Bad:
Jo Wood's Blue Curaçao overload is enough to put one off "The Marlin" (it involves rum, maraschino and citrus) forever - and that's tragic.


VV Brown's bold matador-stewardess from the future has a definite majesty to it. Maybe it's the regal shade.


Nicola McLean demonstrates a truly appalling pants lapse.


What Say You?
When it comes to Beverley Knight's mini: nice use of print, or better as upholstery?

[Images via Getty]

[London, February 17. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[London, February 16. Image via Getty]

Confessions of a Shopaholic, which opens today, is based on a pair of popular novels by British author Madeleine Wickham, which follow the adventures of compulsive shopper Rebecca Bloomwood (Isla Fisher). After being downsized, Rebecca makes a shopping pit stop and fails to show up for an interview at her favorite fashion magazine. Somehow, she winds up getting a job at the personal finance magazine Successful Savings. She creates a hit column even though she knows nothing about finance, winning praise from her coincidentally rich and handsome editor, Luke (Hugh Dancy).

The movie was filmed before the economy got so bad that Suze Orman was forced to appear on Oprah every few weeks to admonish Americans to break their shopping addiction. Now, a film celebrating irresponsible credit card use may seem distasteful, but some critics say it's the only thing that saves Confessions of a Shopaholic from passing into romantic comedy obscurity. Not that the film really teaches any lessons about paying off your debt. Rebecca overcomes her financial problems by lying and cheating rather than realizing there's something wrong with her designer clothing obsession. However, some critics feel that the outfits costume designer Patricia Field picked for Rebecca are so hideous that they are a lesson in and of themselves that overpriced designer fashions bring neither happiness or beauty. Below, the critics weigh in on whether Confessions of a Shopaholic is worth the price of a movie ticket.

Time

Perhaps, then, it's a good thing [shopaholics] have been commemorated in Confessions of a Shopaholic, a movie adaptation of Sophie Kinsella's series of novels about a shopping-obsessed, debt-ridden young English journalist named Becky Bloomwood (Isla Fisher). As a romantic comedy, it is forgettable. But as an ill-timed anthropological artifact, Confessions offers weird pleasures, not least among them the fact that it makes us root for the debt collector.

USA Today

Confessions of a Shopaholic is like a sale item that catches your eye simply because of its garish color, atrocious style and startling uselessness. Not only is it an unfunny movie shrilly told, it probably is the most ill-timed and appallingly insulting movie in recent memory.

Time

[Isla Fisher's] charms are enough to keep the movie - entering the marketplace just as the country's financial situation becomes truly dire - from being criminally distasteful. She's got that rare gift for making slapstick seem organic. Confessions runs her through the chick-flick moves of endearment (walk into glass, run in high heels, spill food on self and others), but there are a few scenes where she cuts loose and we get to see her Lucille Ball–style warmth and wackiness ...

The movie's other saving grace is that Becky has absolutely hideous taste. Whether this is intentional, only costume designer Patricia Field knows for sure. What Carrie Bradshaw might have pulled off, Becky sinks under. Colors, plaids, accessories, boots - it's all garish; she doesn't wear or carry a single appealing object for the length of the movie. This is oddly comforting. We're officially 14 months into this recession, and many of us are not just tightening belts but swearing off shopping altogether. Confessions, perhaps inadvertently, assures us that being deprived of Gucci boots can be a good thing.

NPR

Like her many recent precursors - roles played by the likes of Reese Witherspoon, Renee Zellweger and Drew Barrymore - Rebecca is just too cute to be defeated. Ultimately, she'll walk defiantly past boutiques, and the display-window mannequins will applaud her resolve. Audiences may not join in the ovation. Inside Confessions of a Shopaholic,'s narrative bubble, Rebecca appears blithe and charming. Whenever reality intrudes, however, she looks more like a self-serving Wall Street CEO, squirming at a congressional hearing.

Entertainment Weekly

[Rebecca Bloomwood] is a role you would imagine might be filled, with cheesy-klutzy charm, by Kate Hudson or Sandra Bullock. But Fisher has her own brain-working-a-mile- a-minute adorable magnetism, with eyes that widen like a naughty child's and a smile so vivacious it could light up the next three rooms. Breathless and petite yet powerfully in-your-face, Fisher combines dizzy femininity and no-nonsense verve in the manner of a classic screwball heroine. She's like Carole Lombard reborn as a tiny angel-faced dynamo.

The Observer

We critics have to decide how worshipful we should be toward this flaunting of high fashion while pretending to ridicule it. It's the old Hollywood game of having all your luxury goods, and pretending that they don't bring happiness without true love. That sacred duty is assigned to Hugh Dancy's Luke Brandon, a Brit workaholic magazine editor who is taught to relax in a warmer climate by the irrepressible shopaholic herself. If I understand our president correctly, workaholics are more needed now than shopaholics. But let's be fair. Not too long ago, it was the duty of American consumers to shop until they dropped, and no one warned them of the dire consequences to follow their splurges of extravagance.

The Washington Post

It's all quite silly, and easy, and Confessions of a Shopaholic would never be called out by the rom-com umpire for not touching every base on its way toward home plate. The romance between Luke and Rebecca is a glacial-but-inevitable development, and Rebecca's relationship with her friend Suze (the wonderful Krysten Ritter) is full of inebriation and inadvertent rockiness.

Salon

Although Shopaholic is targeted at women, it also seems to have a remarkable contempt for its female characters — most of whom appear to have the maturity and smarts of a petulant 8-year-old. When Bloomwood pretends that a debt collector is a stawkerish ex-boyfriend, a nearby secretary inexplicably chimes in: "I was once stalked ... by a dog." Bloomwood's roommate (Krysten Ritter) giggles and flounces around their technicolor apartment, and the women Bloomwood encounters at sample sales scream and claw at each other like feral cats.

Slate

Lucky for the movie that Isla Fisher is so likable, because Rebecca Bloomwood is a real dud of a human being: a vain, shallow, materialistic twit who abuses the trust of both her endlessly forgiving boss and her enabling roommate, Suze (Krysten Ritter). The character's moral trajectory over the course of the film makes no sense: She's rewarded over and over for poor performance, and when her comeuppance does arrive, it's so brief and easily overcome that the message seems to be: When in dire financial and personal distress, charge one last cute outfit on your credit card and lie like crazy.

• "Life poet" Joaquin Phoenix on his rap career:

"I want it to be big. Not big like popular. I want it to really try and be, for me, the culmination of my life thus far. I realize it's going to be for public consumption, so there are songs that are about - there are dance songs. Most of it, I think, is an internal exploration." Like a rectal exam? [USA Today]

• James Gray, the director of Joaquin's latest film, Two Lovers, says of JP's hip-hop thing: "If it's an act, it's the most committed act I've ever seen in my life. I mean, he built a studio [in his house]." ABC News]
• If you want to talk to Joaquin Phoenix, prepare to sign a release, because it's gonna be filmed for his documentary. [Gatecrasher]
• A Friday gift: Video of Clive Owen, talking about The International. Why is the way he says "shootout" so sexy? [WSJ]
• Madonna went on a date with Jesus Luz in New York last night; they dined at a steakhouse and talked about Kabbalah. [Daily Mail]
• Before "baby" Jesus left Brazil to hang out with her Madgesty, he had two different girlfriends. [Page Six]
• Nicole Kidman has donated £230,000 to help victims of the Australian bushfires. She says: "As Australians, I think the biggest thing is that, no matter where you are in the world, we support each other and we rally." [The Sun]
• This report says that teen fashion designer Kira Plastinina may have been the cause of the Chris Brown/Rihanna fight. [Extra]
• Chris Brown has left Las Vegas and is on his way to meet his mom; she lives in Virginia but it's unclear if he is headed there or if they are meeting somewhere else. [E!]
• Reports persist that Chris and Rihanna's right started with a text from another woman; Leona Lewis, Paris Hilton and Keisha Chanté were all suspected of flirting with Chris, but all deny it. [E!]
• Roger Friedman from Fox seems to think Paris Hilton is involved. [Fox 411]
• When Rihanna wore an eyepatch in concert last year, was it because Chris Brown had injured her eye? [The Sun]
• Chris Brown is seeking a "crisis-management expert." [EW]
• Oh no: Details of how the surgery of Tameka Foster Raymond — Usher's wife — went terribly wrong: She went to Brazil to get lipo and right after she went under general anesthesia, she suffered cardiac arrest. Of course, Usher's rep issued a statement on February 8 which read: "Tameka Raymond is in stable condition after suffering complications from routine surgery in Brazil." Bold ours, obviously. This may be a case of surgery too soon after childbirth: Their second son is two months old. [People]
• Speaking of surgery, a doctor who does not treat him says Michael Jackson's nose "will collapse" after a staph infection he may have contracted after a nose job. [The Sun]
• Grey's Anatomy creator Shonda Rhimes heard that T.R. Knight and Katherine Heigl were leaving Grey's Anatomy and says: "That was a very interesting rumor. And it's not true." [People]
• Boooo: Victoria Beckham was considered to be a judge on American Idol, but she was too busy. Wouldn't you love to see Posh take on the wacky kids? [Mirror]
• Dina Lohan owes $11,485.74 in taxes on her Long Island home, and today is the deadline to pay. [TMZ]
• Oscar-nominated film-maker Stephen Daldry is pondering a remake of My Fair Lady, with Keira Knightley as Eliza Doolittle. Asks this reporter, Wouldn't it be luvverly? [Daily Mail]
• Who will score an interview with post-bong-pic Michael Phelps? [Page Six]
• Even though Hugh Grant is supposed to be with Jemima Khan, he was seen making out with two women in New York Tuesday night. [Gatecrasher]
• Monday night, Hugh Grant made out with Drew Barrymore. [Page Six]
• Sienna Miller is ShoWest 2009's supporting actress of the year. This summer she'll be in the giant GI Joe flick. [Hollywood Reporter]
• News you can't use: Kimora Lee Simmons prepared for Valentine's Day by getting her armpit hair lasered off. [Page Six]
• Eminem's new track, "Crack A Bottle," featuring Dr. Dre and 50 Cent, set a new first-week record for download sales. [Reuters]
• What is going on over at Desperate Housewives? Eva Longoria and Teri Hatcher are going to kiss in an upcoming episode? Sounds like a desperate reach for ratings. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Did anyone know that Jennifer Hudson's fiancé is training with hopes to be a WWE wrestler? [Perez]
• Mira Sorvino is pregnant with baby number 3. [ET]
• Did Michael Stipe and his entourage once visit Mario Batali's restaurant after the kitchen was closed and keep the place open, ringing up a tab of $5,000? And then not tip or say thank you?!?!?! [Perez]
• Some dude bought a Blackberry on eBay and it had phone numbers for Jude Law, Natalie Portman and Kevin Spacey programmed into it, among others. [Telegraph]
• Kevin Costner's wife Christine gave birth to a baby boy, Hayes Logan Costner, on Thursday night. They have another son named Cayden who is almost 2. [ET]
• Living legend Jane Birkin has a new album, and she wrote all of the songs herself. You may know her as Serge Gainsbourg's love interest, as Charlotte Gainsbourg's mom, or as the inspiration for the Birkin bag. [Dazed Digital]
• The band Yes has canceled concert dates due to "unforeseen" medical reasons. [AP]
• Blind item: "Which disturbed loser is more of a cad than we thought? He's spilling the beans about his former flame's kinky sex habits to anyone who'll listen." [Gatecrasher]
• "[I wanted] to be named New York senator. I can't believe Paterson didn't ask. I even had a slogan: 'Make the switch, vote for the bitch.'" — Joy Behar. [Gatecrasher]
• "I realized partying is not what I am anymore." — Tara Reid, on her new sober life. [Daily Express]
• "I adored him, and I felt adored by him... he said to be a good parent, you never say no." — Emily Mortimer, on her father, who died in January. He was an author and created of a popular UK TV series. [Daily Mail]
• "It's one of those vampire movies. It's very funny. It's me with the beard." — Salma Hayek on her facial hair in her new flick, Cirque du Freak. [USA Today]
• "Toward the end of the shoot, he kept saying 'Oh I'm so tired, I'm so tired.' You hear that kind of thing and you think it's a joke. I just ignored it. I drove up to his house because his phone was disconnected. He said, 'I don't want to act anymore, I've been doing it for 30 years and if you did something for 30 years, you'd want to quit too.' That rap thing ... in the movie actually comes from something I played for him. I had an obsession with doing that sort of thing as a teenager. ... It turns out that Joaquin is imitating me in a lot of the movie. He said, 'I want to do that, I want to steal from that, I want to do the rap that you used to do.' I said, 'OK.' And now I'm seeing him do this thing, and I feel like I've ruined Joaquin Phoenix for the world. I don't want to be the guy that destroyed Joaquin Phoenix's acting career." — James Gray, the director of Two Lovers. [ABC News]
• "You drop some weight just by running after them." — Naomi Watts on her "body after baby." [People]
• "I'm 43 years old and I haven't ever really had a good relationship." — Moby. [NY Mag]
• "Seal always puts a smile on my face. We make each other laugh all the time. Laughing is good. I understand that life is not always just a smile all the time. But when you're facing problems, it doesn't make it better if you're kind of miserable. I always try to have a positive feeling. Every morning when I get up, I'm happy to be here. Even when I'm tired because the kids have been crying in the night, they come in and want mama and crawl into my bed. They look at you and they have that smile on their faces and life is good." — Heidi Klum. [The Star]
• "The pageantry of getting your hair curled and then all these beautiful clothes put on you — it was totally different. It was an escape. In Hollywood, you feel a responsibility to look less disheveled than you are. But I'm a mom and I'm not good at putting time into prepping. I tell my girlfriends — imagine if all the time you put into waxing and primping, you took all of that energy and put it into something useful." — Isla Fisher, on getting styled for Confessions Of A Shopaholic. [WSJ]

[New York, February 11. Image via INF]

• OMG! Project Runway's Tim Gunn will host the red-carpet arrivals at the official Academy Awards pre-show? Genius. Good Morning America's Robin Roberts and Entertainment Weekly's Jess Cagle will join him. Excellent. Carry on! [Variety]

• Prince is having an late-night Oscar bash, and Prince has decided that Prince will perform. [Yahoo News via E!]
• Oh dear: An L.A. woman has filed a $4 billion class action lawsuit against Miley Cyrus, claiming the Disney teen knowingly mocked Asians in a recent photo. Shit, meet fan. [TMZ]
• Margaret Cho thinks Miley Cyrus is "a disgrace." [Perez]
• Did you see Joaquin Phoenix on Letterman last night? You'll find what happened in the dictionary under "trainwreck." (Or at the link here.) [Nikki Finke's Deadline Hollywood]
• Post-steroid-scandal, Alex Rodriguez "ran right home to [wife] Cynthia," which has pissed off Madonna. She's telling A-Rod that her dalliance with Jesus Luz is just a publicity stunt; Rodriguez says he needs to salvage his career. According to this piece, "Now that he's unable to focus all his attention on Madonna, she only wants him more." [Gatecrasher]
• Holy crap: Michael Jackson has some kind of MRSA-type skin infection, like a flesh-eating virus or a staph infection, and it is sad and horrifying. Plus, from the looks of this picture, it hurts. [The Sun]
• Prince Harry has been formally disciplined after being caught on video calling a fellow soldier a racial slur. He will attend an equality and diversity course, and the incident will go on his permanent record. [Mirror, Guardian]
• What is the deal with George Clooney and Benazir Bhutto's 26-year-old niece, Fatima? Pakistan is "besotted" by their "affair." [Independent]
• Clooney's rep says the rumor that Clooney is dating Fatima is false. [WowOwow]
• Lily Allen had a "secret show" last night in New York, and in addition to material from her new album — the bouncy "Fuck You" and stuff from her old CD ("Smile") she covered Britney's "Womanizer." While singing about blow jobs, she "gulped wine" on stage. [Rolling Stone]
• Nicolette Sheridan is packing up her stuff and leaving Wisteria Lane; she will no longer be on Desperate Housewives. [Extra]
• Mary-Kate Olsen looks high fashion freaky in her pictures for the March issue of Interview; she tells the mag about differentiating herself from her sister: "We've always been very different. And we've always had the same goals… At a certain point, we probably just started to vocalize it. When we decided to go to college, we figured we'd be able to take a break and just figure out what we wanted to do and what we loved… just by being able to step away from the work world." [ONTD]
• Queen Latifah was on a bus tour of Newark, N.J. yesterday to promote options that will help homeowners avoid foreclosures. [UPI]
• Had Rihanna been working on a song about murdering a cheating partner before she was attacked by Chris Brown? [The Sun]
• Chris Brown is currently holed up at the Hard Rock Hotel in Vegas. [Yahoo News via E!]
• Except that this report says Chris Brown and Rhianna are both in L.A. Oh, and don't click this link unless you want to read a whole lot of bullshit speculation about how Rihanna maybe hit Chris first and "Lamborghini's [sic] have small cabins that are hard to maneuver in. Brown, who would have been driving, could have used his teeth as a weapon to defend himself against Rihanna's flailing." [Fox 411]
• Sigh, there is a delay in the Chris Brown case. The D.A spokesperson says: "It's our understanding the LAPD won't return the case to us this week. Once we get it, we will review it again to determine if there's a case." Wait, what? [People]
• Here's a better explanation of whether Chris should be charged with criminal threats or the lesser charge of domestic battery. [TMZ]
• Cops will reinterview Chris Brown and Rihanna again soon. [NY Daily News]
• Chris Brown's wardrobe stylist says: "Chris is all right. He's a good kid. He feels very bad that something like this has happened." Ugh! Passive talk. He feels bad "something happened" or he feels bad about what he did? [People]
• Leona Lewis denies involvement in the Chris Brown/Rihanna situation. [Daily Mail]
• When asked by paparazzi about Chris Brown, Terrence Howard said: "Chris is a great guy. He'll be all right." Now he says: "When they asked me about Chris Brown the other day, I was in no way aware of what he had been accused of. Had I known, I would have never had said something so insensitive." Seriously dude? Put down the baby wipes and pick up a newspaper or something. [E!]
• Clive Owen continues to promote his film and charm the underpants off of us. [CBS News]
• Drew Barrymore says Adam Sandler was her favorite on-screen kiss. "It was really innocent and unsalacious." [Mirror]
• Whoa: Nicolas Sarkozy proposed to Carla Bruni within two hours of meeting her. [Daily Mail]
• Groan: Sports Illustrated cover moddle Bar Refaeli ate cheeseburgers and ice cream before her shoot and did not work out. [Gatecrasher]
• Will Sean Penn be in a Three Stooges biopic? [Page Six]
• Balthazar Getty's exit from Brothers & Sisters will be "shocking." Spoilers all there if you click the link. [E!]
• Sam Shepard pled guilty to DUI and speeding from that bust last month in Illinois — he had a .175 blood alcohol level. Drunkety drunk drunk drunk. [TMZ]
• Kate Hudson has a stripper pole in her bathroom and a spy says: "She's so proud of it. She was laughing and giddy like a kid when the thing was installed! She holds on with both her arms and flips her legs into the air. It's kind of amazing and totally sexy." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Joe Francis is no longer on house arrest. He's free to go wild. [TMZ]
• Steven Seagal wants Costa Rica to have a filmmaking industry. "Costa Rica has everything — both rain forest and dry climate. What it lacks is an infrastructure to make movies," he said in a news conference. Send us plane tickets and let us judge for ourselves! [Reuters]
• Akon has a Chevron gas station in his backyard. [The Life Files]
• Blind item! "Which pro athlete's actress-girlfriend is going to be less than pleased when she discovers he's sleeping with college girls on the side?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Any actor who starts taking 'sex symbol' seriously or thinks of themselves as a sex symbol has got some serious problems. When I'm in my normal life I care very little about how I look. Sometimes I have to dress up when I'm making movies, but that's not me when I'm just hanging around. I don't mind looking like I need a good wash and a good meal. There's no vanity about my character and I think that's real. His absolute obsessive passion is trying to bring a bank down. He doesn't care how he looks. So I just stopped shaving and left it to the make-up people to make sure I looked bad in every scene." — Clive Owen. [Mirror]
• "I had to be chained to the ceiling with a hood over my head, in my boxer shorts, being hosed down by a soldier, with cold air fans blowing on me. I wouldn't recommend being tortured by Samuel L Jackson. He seems to enjoy it a little too much." — Michael Sheen, who filmed Unthinkable with Jackson. [Telegraph]
• "She's so different from me. She's so focused on the outside. She just loves clothes and she just loves life, and she wants to make the world more beautiful. How often do you read a comedy script with a woman in the lead, and she's actually a flawed, deluded character? And I was able to do physical comedy. It was a dream role." — Isla Fisher on Rebecca Bloomwood, her Shopaholic character. [USA Today]
• "The people who are the most beautiful are those who do what they love to do – who have love in their lives, and laugh a lot, go to good movies, read good books, and have great sex. A guy who's a chauvinist I'm not interested in. Any good man knows women are much smarter than men." — Carla Gugino, to Women's Health. [People]
• "We very rarely talk but when we do, it sure makes me laugh. She's one of the funniest ladies I know and I hold huge amounts of love and respect for her. She's my big sister. Things were wild during the years I was with her in the band and she's one of the wildest creatures I've ever met, but I have my own personal perception of her. There's nobody else like her. I feel like there should be a review of the great stuff that Hole and Courtney put out there. I would support that because I feel it's important to pass on to women of future generations." — Melissa Auf der Maur on Courtney Love. [ONTD via Spinner]
• "When you look at someone like Jessica [Simpson], I don't know if she gained weight, but it's all I've heard about. I'm looking for someone with a great voice, but if someone is 50 pounds overweight, I have to tell them the reality - that it might hold them back." — American Idol judge Kara DioGuardi. [MSNBC]

[New York, February 9. Image via INF]

• Instead of appearing at the Grammy Awards, Chris Brown - seen at left with Rihanna at a pre-Grammy party - was arrested for a felony battery.

He surrendered to the LAPD and then posted $50,000 bail. An "unidentified woman" who appeared to have been beaten identified Brown as her attacker. Rihanna did not show up at the Grammys either. [EW, Rolling Stone, People,TMZ]

• Sources say Rihanna's face is "slightly bruised." [ET]
• This report says Rihanna had "multiple bruises" and was in the hospital but has been released. [NY Daily News]
• Cops say that Chris Brown and "the woman" they are not identifying were arguing inside a vehicle after midnight on Saturday; they received a 911 call and when they arrived, they noticed that the woman had "visible injuries." Brown had left the scene by the time police arrived. [TMZ]
• The case is a felony and not a misdemeanor because of the visible injuries. [People]
• The argument took place in a rented Lamborghini after a pre-Grammy gala at the Beverly Hilton. [Fox 411]
• Rapper David Banner says: "One situation doesn't define a man and I really want American to stop doing that to people. As humans, none of us is perfect." Um, yeah, but. You don't hit women. [Rolling Stone]
• Apparently in 2007, Chris Brown told Giant magazine: "[My stepfather] used to hit my mom. He made me terrified all the time, terrified like I had to pee on myself. I remember one night he made her nose bleed. I was crying and thinking, 'I'm just gonna go crazy on him one day…' I hate him to this day." A family history of domestic violence? [Perez]
• Chris Brown's court date is March 5. [USA Today]
• Commenters on the EW boards claim Chris Brown hit Rihanna because he found out she gave him genital herpes, which she got from a backup dancer. Where are they getting their info? [EW]
• Oh, wait. From here. [All Hip-Hop]
• This blogger adds, "Why is all this foolishness taking place during Black History Month?" [All Hip-Hop]
• Meanwhile: Rihanna is looking for a bone marrow donor for a 5-year-old girl. [UPI]
• Uh-oh: Peaches Geldof and husband of six months, Max Drummey, have separated! To her credit, Peaches did say she didn't expect it to last forever. But maybe at least a year? [Daily Mail]
• Amy Winehouse is heading back to the UK after a long vacation in the Caribbean. She plans to present her lawyers with a "secret ex-file," detailing Blake Incarcerated's bad behavior. Ugly divorce countdown starts now! [News Of The World]
• Is there tension in the Beckham marriage as Victoria heads to New York fashion week alone? She reportedly wants to stay in the U.S.: "She feels out of place in Milan and gets frustrated by not being able to understand what they are saying." [Daily Mail]
• Whitney Houston sang at Clive Davis's pre-Grammy bash and sounded "incredible," E!'s Marc Malkin says. "Was she back to the days when she was in top high-note-hitting form? No, but close." [Yahoo News via E!]
• Usher had to cancel his performance at a pre-Grammy party due to a "serious injury in the family" — apparently his wife Tameka experienced complications from plastic surgery in Brazil. Yikes! [TMZ, People]
• A neurosurgeon from LA's Cedars-Sinai Medical Center is headed to South America to check on Usher's wife. [Access Hollywood]
• Jennifer Aniston's 40th birthday party took place Saturday night at her house in Beverly Hills. Aniston and John Mayer "danced and huddled close all night," and guests included Oprah Winfrey, Sheryl Crow, David Arquette and wife Courteney Cox Arquette, Tobey Maguire and wife Jen Meyer, Laura Dern, Kevin Nealon, and Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson. Aniston has some kind of pull in Hollywood: the police kicked all the paparazzi out of the neighborhood! [Yahoo News via E!]
• Lindsay Lohan was seen hanging out at a table behind Sam Ronson's DJ booth; while Sam worked, LL was drinking from bottles stashed under the table. LL would flirt with guys but bitch out any woman who came close. This report notes that LL looked "grossly skinny." [E!]
• Director McG says of Christian Bale's "blowup": "The film set is a passionate place, and it happens… It was just one of those moments. I think I can speak on all of our behalf that we've all gotten a little fired up. And if anybody would take that moment and take it out of context, it would seem very, very strange." [People]
• Beyoncé runs around two and-a-half miles every day and is "eating veg and drinking water" because her stylists — and her mom tell her when she's gained weight. As for the diet: "It's boring." [Mirror]
• Here's video of the Jessica Simpson performance in which "every song was a disaster" and she mumbled through the lyrics and talked through tears, if you really want to watch that kind of thing. [ONTD via TMZ]
• Since she is producing a teen TV show for Fox and has a movie in the works, Jennifer Lopez is "putting music on the back burner," which may be for the best. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Do we really believe that Leonardo DiCaprio wants girlfriend Bar Refaeli to be on the cover of Sports Illustrated's Swimsuit Issue because it will "piss off" Gisele Bundchen? [Page Six]
• Prince Harry and Paris Hilton were supposed to have a date? And the Prince canceled at the last minute? Did he come to his senses? Should we feel sorry for Paris? [Daily Mail]
• Eddie Murphy has been ordered to pay £35,000 a month until his daughter — whose mother is Mel B. — turns 18. That's a total of about £7million. Another Shrek sequel? Anyone? [Daily Mail]
• What's this? Emma Watson is nervous about kissing Rupert Grint, aka Ron Weasley, on screen? [Telegraph]
• Dave Grohl wore a white knot on the red carpet at the Grammys to show his support for gay marriage and marriage equality. Think we'll see 'em at the Oscars? [E!]
• A man was killed on Justin Timberlake's golf course in Tennessee Saturday in a freak accident involving a tree. [TMZ]
• Minutes into his act at a UK nightclub, rapper Coolio was pelted by plastic bottles and ice cubes. Coolio jumped into the crowd to fight some dudes but was dragged way by security. Not exactly a gangster's paradise… [The Sun]
• The new Dancing With The Stars cast has been revealed! Jewel and her husband, rodeo star Ty Murray, will compete against each other. The youngest contestant ever, 17-year-old Olympic gymnast Shawn Johnson will dance; and so will Julianne Hough and boyfriend Chuck Wicks; Maksim Chmerkovskiy and Karina Smirnoff; Belinda Carlisle; Denise Richards, former NFL star Lawrence Taylor; Lil' Kim; Jackass star Steve-O; Apple computer co-founder Steve Wozniak; actors David Alan Grier and Gilles Marini; and Access Hollywood co-host Nancy O'Dell. [People]
• Remember when Natalie Portman rapped on Saturday Night Live? Uncensored audio can be found here [ONTD]
• Hugh Grant and ex Jemima Khan are so, so back on. [Telegraph]
• Welcome Charlie Axel into the world; he's the first son for Tiger Woods and wife Elin. [AP]
• A reporter calls The International, Tom Tykwer's film starring Clive Owen and Naomi Watts, a "strange and beautifully made thriller." Tykwer is best known for his 1998 flick, Run Lola Run. [Salon]
• Robbie Williams has been visiting weird websites, stuff like government paranoia and UFOs. [Daily Mail]
• Original Buffy The Vampire Slayer Kristy Swanson and ice skating champ Lloyd Eisler got married on Saturday. This story notes that Swanson "lost 45 lbs. in time for her wedding with the help of The Medifast Diet and regular exercise, including martial arts, skipping rope and treadmill work." [People]
• A tell-all book about Sean "Diddy Combs" by a former aspiring rapper is called Dancing With the Devil: How Puff Burned the Bad Boys of Hip-Hop. It's self-published, naturally. [Page Six]
• Are you ready for a Tricky comeback? [Independent]
• "Straying Alive! Married Bee Gee Robin Gibb has baby with live-in housekeeper 26 years his junior." [Daily Mail]
• "I want to keep learning, I have no ego. I'm blessed to be on one of the great shows. I made a statement last year that I was going to aggressively pursue my acting career… I want to do some television." - Sean "Diddy Combs on his CSI: Miami gig. [The Star]
• Paradise Beach had improbable plot-lines. We were always in bikinis, even at funerals. And someone who was my brother ended up being my father and I pulled him – it was just insane." — Isla Fisher on her soap opera past, to GQ. [Daily Express]
• "Besides being in love with him, I'm his biggest fan. I think my fiancé is hilarious." — Isla Fisher on Sacha Baron Cohen. [Mirror]
• "I've decided I am going to start loving my backside because I don't know anyone who does that. And for my daughter, I want to be able to say to her, 'I love this.' [Young women] look at all of us, myself included, on these magazine covers and they think, 'My God, how does she get skin like that?' And I can tell you, I have so many blemishes under this make-up that have been so fabulously covered, I promise you. I did realise a few years ago that no one actually talks about this retouching thing. It's like a secret or something. I'm damned if it's going to be a secret any more. I really want these young women to know we don't look like this." — Kate Winslet. [Daily Mail]
• "I think I definitely want to go to college… I could always study drama. I think that would be really cool. There's always more you can learn. If I wanted to do something totally different, I love history." — Dakota Fanning. [Newsweek]
• "Sir Anthony Hopkins is in the recording studio with Amy Winehouse, and we are hoping that next week Sir Brad and all the Pitt family will be performing The Sound of Music at the Brit awards." — Mick Jagger, making jokes at the Baftas. [People]
• "It's so invasive. It's not like they're standing 100 feet away. They're in your face, not letting you walk, standing in the way when you're driving. It becomes a situation and it doesn't need to be." — Jessica Alba on the paparazzi. [The Star]
• "I got into a bit of hot water for what I said about Amy Winehouse and I still say it again. I'm an ex-drug addict and I don't take that kind of stuff lightly. It stayed in my body for 25 years and it could still happen to this young woman or other addicts who are fooling around with drugs, especially needles. I would hope that what happened to me does not happen to her." — Natalie Cole, who has Hepatitis C and is waiting for a kidney transplant, on Amy Winehouse. [Mirror]
• "Every time I go for an ultra scan the baby is like in crazy positions with legs star-shaped and stuff. It's not like in a baby position at all. I feel like he is used to base lines and beats and receptive to that, which is cute." — M.I.A. [Mirror]
• "I grew up in Nashville, Tennessee, and my parents taught me to respect my elders. We'd say things like 'yes, ma'am' and 'no, sir' to adults. But kids in Los Angeles don't do that. I've drawn the line at my children calling adults by their first names. I tell them they can call people 'Miss Shannon' or 'Miss Heather' but that using only the first name is too familiar. Maybe I'm just old-fashioned." — Reese Witherspoon. [Reader's Digest]
• "It's crazy for people to care about him having a bong hit. Nothing's the matter with it - I want to have a bong hit right now. Really, the message Phelps is giving is that you can smoke weed and still be at the top of your game." — Bill Maher. [Gatecrasher]
• "My split with Brad was the hardest thing I ever went through. But it made me strong, superhuman. Now I'm turning 40 and I'm very excited. When they say youth is wasted on the young, it's so true.'" — Jennifer Aniston. [Daily Mail]
• People have called me a sex symbol in the past, but it's very much an effort […] It's been important for me to just do something that's extreme — that really separates me from that public Joaquin Phoenix persona, whatever the fuck that is. Or maybe I'm just lazy." — Joaquin Phoenix on his new, grizzy, bearded "look." [The Sun]