inventions - Jezebel

posts about #inventions more →
Wild Ride
Return To Oz!
Pillow Talk
Eye Of A Needle
High-Tech Love
The Semen Detection Spy Kit Comes To Amazon.com
Eggcellent
Custom Lingerie
Invention Lets Women "Practice" Giving Birth With A Balloon
Fetal Educator Strap

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Slovenly Muse
06/23/09

In reply to Wild Ride
If that came in adult sizes, I would trade my car in for that thing in a heartbeat.

Yes, it would take me forever to get anywhere. Yes, it would be totally worth it.
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sybann
06/23/09

In reply to Wild Ride
I think most kids will LURV this to pieces.
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Cole23
06/23/09

In reply to Wild Ride
I guess we can start fucking them up sooner and sooner.
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Samanthrax
06/23/09

@Cole23: Not for nothing, but I loved stuff like this when I was a kid and I turned out okayish. It doesn't have to be butterflies and dinosaurs for every kid...
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LatinaMasFina
06/23/09

In reply to Wild Ride
I wouldn't give it to my child to play with. I would mount it on a long pole and, then at night, use it to "peek" in the windows of my kids if they were bad that day.

See? When you're bad, the monsters get hungry. That's what I call effective discipline.
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Aesop's Foibles. YES.
06/23/09

@LatinaMasFina: I just laughed so hard a big wad of spit flew out of my mouth. That is fucking awesome. And yes, very effective.
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BabyJane
06/23/09

In reply to Wild Ride
That looks exactly the way a hangover feels.
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hydrogen_jukebox
06/23/09

In reply to Wild Ride
This is what my boyfriend would deem the perfect toy for our hypothetical-someday children. If he could, he'd have Tim Burton decorate the nursery.

Not that I'm complaining. He says he wants our children to be fearless.
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Zombies make the heart grow fonder
06/23/09

In reply to Wild Ride
Holy shit. I would have been terrified of that thing as a child.
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sportz.star
06/23/09

In reply to Wild Ride
Fine, you don't want to wear your glasses or go to the dentist? You don't have to. But remember, this is what you'll look like when you grow up.
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WashingMyHair
06/23/09

In reply to Wild Ride
Only one occasion comes to mind for use of this thing - Halloween.
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morninggloria
06/23/09

In reply to Wild Ride
That reminds me of the one eyed, one legged monster that terrorized Pee Wee and the other Playhouse friends during one Very Special episode. Turns out, the monster was just trying to be friends, but the Playhouse crew didn't realize this until Jombi magicked him the ability to speak English.
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lilbobbytables
06/23/09

@morninggloria: I knew it was familiar! I KNEW IT!
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BabyJane
06/23/09

@morninggloria: I remember that!
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BabyJane
06/23/09

@BabyJane: I was actually going to look for a picture of it to post and then I thought about the search results that "Pee Wee's one eyed monster" might bring up.
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andBegorrah
06/23/09

In reply to Wild Ride
For when Mr Todd just needs to fuck shit up.
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Samanthrax
06/23/09

In reply to Wild Ride
I keep thinking it looks like... crap. Dr. Rick Dagless, M.D.'s eye baby from Garth Marenghi's Darkplace. "S" something...
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nessalicious
06/23/09

@Samanthrax is Sarcastic: YES! I was thinking exactly, thank you!
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Spaceman Bill Leah
06/23/09

In reply to Wild Ride
This is what you get for the kid in your life who is a total little shit.
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Rare Affinity
06/23/09

@Spaceman Bill Leah: If he is that much of a little monster he would get nothing from me. Besides, many children love things which are really gory.
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prettycool
05/14/09

In reply to Return To Oz!
My stepdad was one of the most popular wig makers in Beverly Hills. He did a lot of pieces for movies, including the hairdos from Edward Scissorhands.

That said, it was really embarrassing when friends would come over and discover a room full of synthetic hair. It was like something from a cheap horror movie.
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AJ
05/14/09

In reply to Return To Oz!
I know it's about wigs, but thanks to the title all I can think about is Return to Oz and how much Mombi scared the shit out of me as a child. The woman swapped heads! Although I wonder, if she'd had this gadget, maybe the head swapping would've been unnecessary.

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Vivelafat says Sweep the leg, Johnny.
05/14/09

@AJ with the AbbyNormal Brain: Seriously!! It was nuts right? The Nome King and Pumpkin Jack and Dorthy had a CHICKEN! The whole thing freaked me the fuck out!!
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Pocahaunted
05/14/09

@AJ with the AbbyNormal Brain: BEBEH FAIRUZA!!!!
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