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New York, 11:22 PM
Mon Dec 21
55 posts in the last 24 hours

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of lalaland13 lalaland13
    03:53 PM

    In reply to Bogus: The Phoniest Tabloid Stories Of 2009
    Actually, a friend of a source of a roommate tells me Michelle was impregnated by Ted Kennedy before he died (as opposed to after) and that the only reasonable thing to do was to put the child in a Portugese Water Dog costume and act so happy that Ted "gave" the family a new "pet."
     Reply
    lalaland13 was starred lalaland13 was unstarred
    Image of rodmanstreet rodmanstreet
    03:22 PM

    In reply to Bogus: The Phoniest Tabloid Stories Of 2009
    I'm kind of loving the smug, giddy look on Gerard Butler's face in # 7. I'm almost hearing Austin Powers' voice: "Yeah, baby!"
     Reply
    rodmanstreet was starred rodmanstreet was unstarred
    Image of o-line o-line
    03:22 PM

    In reply to Bogus: The Phoniest Tabloid Stories Of 2009
    I can't wait for my first issue of Jennifer Aniston Will Die Alone Weekly to arrive in the mail.
     Reply
    o-line was starred o-line was unstarred
    Image of Yahtzii Yahtzii
    03:20 PM

    In reply to Bogus: The Phoniest Tabloid Stories Of 2009
    Angelina adopts Michael Jackson's children!
    Jen's baby fever is out of control!

    Britney Spears engaged to Robert Pattinson, who is an actual emo vampire!
    Stalk me, baby, one more time!

    President Obama caught in torrid embrace with Brad Pitt!
    We hear they're converting to Scientology, because why the fuck not?

    Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are a normal couple! No, really. Seriously. REALLY.
     Reply
    Edited by Yahtzii at 12/21/09 3:22 PM Yahtzii was starred Yahtzii was unstarred
    Image of CurtCole CurtCole
    03:24 PM

    @Yahtzii: Brad and Angelina decided on one last name for Shiloh as soon as they realized Jolie-Pitt sounds like Holy Shit!
     Reply
    CurtCole was starred CurtCole was unstarred
    Image of Mary McCarthyite Mary McCarthyite
    03:25 PM

    @Yahtzii: I bet at least one of these comes true in 2010.
     Reply
    Mary McCarthyite was starred Mary McCarthyite was unstarred
    Image of Yahtzii Yahtzii
    03:27 PM

    @CurtCole: Gwyneth Paltrow debut her new line: GOOP for K-Mart!
     Reply
    Yahtzii was starred Yahtzii was unstarred
    Image of CurtCole CurtCole
    03:30 PM

    @Yahtzii: GOOP taken off shelves after customer complains that it does not contain goop, only uppity advice!!!
     Reply
    CurtCole was starred CurtCole was unstarred
    Image of SunburnedCounsel SunburnedCounsel
    03:15 PM

    In reply to Bogus: The Phoniest Tabloid Stories Of 2009
    "Unless they've cleverly disguised their adopted son in a Portuguese Water Dog costume, this never happened."

    This made me laugh. Really, awkwardly hard. Thanks Margaret.
     Reply
    SunburnedCounsel was starred SunburnedCounsel was unstarred
    Image of sassyredhead sassyredhead
    03:26 PM

    @SunburnedCounsel: Me too! And I so needed it! Thanks Margaret!
     Reply
    sassyredhead was starred sassyredhead was unstarred
    Image of cate3710 cate3710
    03:05 PM

    In reply to Bogus: The Phoniest Tabloid Stories Of 2009
    I am still insanely jealous of the Jolie-Pitt "theme days." I wanna play too!
     Reply
    cate3710 was starred cate3710 was unstarred
    Image of Margaret Margaret
    03:10 PM

    @cate3710: I know! I'm thinking of consoling myself by having a Jolie-Pitt theme day and forcing each of my friends to dress up as one of the kids.
     Reply
    Margaret was starred Margaret was unstarred
    Image of SunburnedCounsel SunburnedCounsel
    03:16 PM

    @Margaret: Can I be Shiloh? She always seems to have a sword, and sensible shoes.
     Reply
    SunburnedCounsel was starred SunburnedCounsel was unstarred
    Image of VoxPopuli VoxPopuli
    11/25/09

    In reply to This Week In Tabloids: Jolie & Johnny Destined To Fornicate
    So...Ashlee's eyes in frame 10. What's going on there? Are they actually looking in two directions? She looks possessed.

    Also, I assume that Nicole and Penelope have probably met before - Hollywood is a small town, really. I'm sure they've already swapped Tom Cruise stories before working together, which is why they're not talking about them now. Not because women always have to talk about their exes, but you know - there's always that one really weird ex that you're dying to swap stories about.
     Reply
    VoxPopuli was starred VoxPopuli was unstarred
    Image of Snowbunny Snowbunny
    11/25/09

    In reply to This Week In Tabloids: Jolie & Johnny Destined To Fornicate
    J. Lo just set a new level of sexy face in slide 10. Can Megan Fox rise to the challenge?
     Reply
    Snowbunny was starred Snowbunny was unstarred
    Image of BlueMorpho BlueMorpho
    11/25/09

    In reply to This Week In Tabloids: Jolie & Johnny Destined To Fornicate
    I never knew that my thumbs were freaky. Thanks, In Touch!
     Reply
    whynotshesaid promoted this comment BlueMorpho was starred BlueMorpho was unstarred
    Image of whynotshesaid whynotshesaid
    11/27/09

    @BlueMorpho: Oh wow, I had no idea that I was not the only one in the world with these freaky thumbs. I feel so validated now.
     Reply
    whynotshesaid was starred whynotshesaid was unstarred
    Image of FrannyR FrannyR
    11/25/09

    In reply to This Week In Tabloids: Jolie & Johnny Destined To Fornicate
    If everyone whose kids like pirates would hook up, society would collapse because the world would turn into one giant orgie
     Reply
    J.D.Regent promoted this comment FrannyR was starred FrannyR was unstarred
    Image of R_Claw R_Claw
    11/25/09

    In reply to This Week In Tabloids: Jolie & Johnny Destined To Fornicate
    I now want a calendar where each month there's a different dog reading a different tell-all book about a different celebrity. I think this is genius.
     Reply
    R_Claw was starred R_Claw was unstarred
    Image of funzette funzette
    11/25/09

    In reply to This Week In Tabloids: Jolie & Johnny Destined To Fornicate
    "Carey told Shia that Keira warned her that he's a player, which enraged Shia, because he's really genuine. "

    Shia, you'll always be a damaged norseman mascot to me, and I tend to doubt the veracity of tabloid anecdotes, but most "genuine" people don't get "enraged" when someone calls them "a player".
     Reply
    Edited by funzette at 11/25/09 3:58 PM funzette was starred funzette was unstarred
    Image of f_t_e f_t_e
    11/25/09

    In reply to This Week In Tabloids: Jolie & Johnny Destined To Fornicate
    I wish someone would 'ruin' Christmas for me by taking me to Vietnam.

    Also, I am impressed that In Touch didn't go ahead and put REMEMBER WHEN HEATH LEDGER DIED? under Michelle Williams face.
     Reply
    Dodai promoted this comment f_t_e was starred f_t_e was unstarred
    Image of applejuice applejuice
    11/25/09

    In reply to This Week In Tabloids: Jolie & Johnny Destined To Fornicate
    I wanna hear about "Angie and Brad's Obama Battle" in Us.

    Ever since I heard Jolie say how she lurrrrved Ayn Rand and that the Fountainhead was great and "changed" her life, I have felt she probably shares some of her father's political views...

    If I were betting I'd say she's a Libertarian and she's the one who dislikes Obama.
     Reply
    applejuice was starred applejuice was unstarred
    Image of SybilDisobedience SybilDisobedience
    11/25/09

    @applejuice: I've read from some other sources that she does not like Obama at all, and Brad's a supporter, so they duke it out over their differences. Doesn't surprise me a bit - like you say, I think she's more conservative than her general public image would dictate.
     Reply
    SybilDisobedience was starred SybilDisobedience was unstarred
    Image of kookla kookla
    11/25/09

    In reply to This Week In Tabloids: Jolie & Johnny Destined To Fornicate
    The last time I had steamy sex in the shower, I slipped and busted my ass bone. Then I couldn't do anything for 6 months. Even now I prefer baths.
     Reply
    kookla was starred kookla was unstarred
    Image of hollygirl hollygirl
    11/25/09

    @kookla: A friend of mine broke his penis fucking in the shower- he had the girl in his arms with her legs around him and she slipped pff mid-thrust and his dick cracked. He was kind of never the same after that.
     Reply
    Edited by hollygirl at 11/25/09 3:38 PM hollygirl was starred hollygirl was unstarred
    Image of jigglyball jigglyball
    11/25/09

    @kookla: Good lord, I'm glad I'm not the only one who's shower sex-challenged. Until I can install footstools, never-slip bath mats, handles of varying heights, and padded walls in my shower, I will be boning elsewhere.
     Reply
    jigglyball was starred jigglyball was unstarred
    Image of Lysergic Asset Lysergic Asset
    11/25/09

    @hollygirl: I just read that to my boyfriend, who has suddenly decided to swear off having sex in the shower.
     Reply
    Lysergic Asset was starred Lysergic Asset was unstarred
    Image of hollygirl hollygirl
    11/25/09

    @Lysergic Asset: Happy to help. I imagine he's grabbing his package and wincing right now, yes?

    #tips
     Reply
    hollygirl was starred hollygirl was unstarred
    Image of Lysergic Asset Lysergic Asset
    11/25/09

    @hollygirl: We were both wincing as I read it. Poor guy. (Your friend, that is.)

    #tips
     Reply
    Lysergic Asset was starred Lysergic Asset was unstarred
    Image of kookla kookla
    11/25/09

    @hollygirl: I didn't even know they can break! Not that I haven't come close!

    @jigglyball: Another bit of advice, make sure your partner is muscular. Skinny people don't have the upper body strength.

    #tips
     Reply
    kookla was starred kookla was unstarred
    Image of Chuck Basketcase Chuck Basketcase
    11/25/09

    @hollygirl: I know it's wrong, but I'm laughing hysterically over this story.
     Reply
    hollygirl promoted this comment Chuck Basketcase was starred Chuck Basketcase was unstarred
    Image of Snowbunny Snowbunny
    11/25/09

    @jigglyball: Old people used to live in my house, so my bathroom is full of safety handles. It's amazing for doing things like shaving legs. I've never fucked in the shower, but I feel confident I can do it in my shower.
     Reply
    Snowbunny was starred Snowbunny was unstarred
    Image of goodcheapfun goodcheapfun
    11/26/09

    @kookla: I wouldn't surrender my life to anyone holding me up in the shower. You keep one leg on the floor and than have at it. I recommend it.
     Reply
    kookla promoted this comment goodcheapfun was starred goodcheapfun was unstarred
    Image of hollygirl hollygirl
    11/27/09

    @Chuck Basketcase: Oh, all of his friends howled for months.
     Reply
    hollygirl was starred hollygirl was unstarred
    Image of kookla kookla
    11/29/09

    @goodcheapfun: I'm going to have to do more lunges to build up my skinny ankles.
     Reply
    kookla was starred kookla was unstarred
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