[New York, August 3. Image via Bauer-Griffin.]

From "And Wilt Thou Weep When I Am Low?" (1808)

From "On This Day I Complete My Thirty-Sixth Year." (1824)

From "When We Two Parted" (1817)

From "The First Kiss of Love" (1806)

From "So, We'll Go No More A-Roving" (1817)

Earlier poetry: Teen Prom: Grotesque Gowns & Girl-On-Girl Action
French Vogue: The Wind Beneath Our Wings

[Carson, CA; May 2. Image via INF.]

[London, April 24. Image via INF]

[West Hollywood, March 3. Image via Splash.]

[New York, February 21. Image via INFDaily.]

The fact that SJP is on the cover is actually quite apropos; this photo shoot may make you actually miss Sex And The City. Or at least Samantha.

"Mrs. Robinson, are you trying to seduce me?"

"Yes, and I shouldn't have to try this hard. I am a leggy Danish supermodel, after all."

"After your tennis lesson, I want you to come straight home without showering, you understand? And what's with the jeans? You know you're supposed to wear those tiny shorts I bought you."

"We have to hurry and do this before my husband gets home. But is there any chance you can call your boyf — I mean, roommate — Chace, and get him over here?"

Raise your hand if you find this very, very, hot.

File under: Women To Go Lezebel For.

Tough to see here, but there's a cherry in his mouth and a stem in hers. If you're old like me you'll recall that episode of Twin Peaks that changed the way you thought about cherry stems. If you're not, ask somebody.

The benefits of having a boytoy: You get final say in wardrobe approval. And hot sex.

Unlike the movie, this story has a happy ending: Mrs. Robinson and her young beau live happily ever after, or at least until dawn.

Check out this video, which is allegedly part of an "underground campaign."

Doesn't this just mock the girl's athleticism — or lack of — even further? Because, yeah, clearly: Stunt double. And even though, as Fashionista points out, Leighton Meester is shilling for Reebok and Ed Westwick is pushing KSwiss, does anyone on Gosip Girl even wear sneakers?

The good news? Rumor has it that some colleges have Chuck Bass Fridays. GG costume designer Eric Daman says: "Bass goes beyond my personal style, I wish I had the money and youth to carry off his looks. It’s just un rêve (a dream) to dress a womanizing straight boy in such dandy apparel." You call it a dream to dress him, sir: Many ladies would prefer to undress him.

Taylor Momsen for Nike?! [Fashionista]
Colleges Have Chuck Bass Fridays? [NY Mag]
Earlier: Teen Vogue Makes Gossip Girl's Patch-Wearing Little J Pretend To Exercise

Like he doesn't do it every week on TV? Westwick humored Babs by mouthing off. "Whaddya want me to say to you," he uttered in his best (worst?) 'Murrican accent. As for yawn-inducing Chace Crawford, he got Sherri and Elisabeth to chuckle by recounting some British-isms he's picked up by living with Westwick (rubbish, GA-rage). Not to be outdone, Whoopi found it necessary to point out that she, also had no idea that Ed Westwick was English. Ladies, this show has been on since Fall 2007. Worst. Interview. Ever! Clip above.

[New York, November 20. Image via Splash.]

[New York, October 21. Image via Splash.]

[New York, October 14. Image via x17.]

[New York, August 13. Image via Splash.]

[New York, July 29. Image via Splash.]

[Las Vegas, June 27. Image via x17.]

[Ed Westwick heading to the set of "Gossip Girl," June 23. Image via Splash.]