Jezebel 
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New York, 8:49 PM
Thu Nov 26
3 posts in the last 24 hours
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09/18/09
This is the next best thing to, well, having to pay to send Dooce email just to waste emotions. (Impractical mechanics render that more of a dream than reality.)
I'm usually in the camp of ignoring trolls, but ah, the smarter (or dumber, depending on your perspective) ones have figured that out, and easily move on to future targets who CAN be prodded. Their behavor won't be any better. Chronic daftness, alas, is not is short supply. And sadly, neither is bit-bullying.
Yet more perplexing are those who spew bile on the Internet, yet couldn't bear to say it to your face. And how's that for a coupling of cowardice and dishonesty?
Thankfully, Heather B. Armstrong has far more imaginative genius (GENIUS!) which rises above the din.
09/18/09
Seriously people: if you hate someone, IGNORE them. Nothing kills like neglect. Hatemail and pageviews only feed the beast (I'm looking at all you Perez haters who still read his site!)
09/17/09
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09/17/09
Speaking of mommy-bloggers though, I often wonder if the Pioneer Woman gets hate mail. She must, but she really hasn't mentioned it, and she seems almost impossibly un-hateable.
09/17/09
I started reading long before I had children and know plenty of childless people who still enjoy her writing. I am firmly in the "I don't understand the hate" camp. And for the record, there is no way Ree gets hatemail.
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09/17/09
I just don't get personal anecdote blogs really, be they from this lady or what's-his-face Maxx that has an awful looking movie now. But I don't have an interest in NASCAR either.
But I do love reading emails from crazy people, so it's a toss-up.
09/17/09
I'm not saying everyone needs to like it, just saying it's not just another "mommy blog" (to me).
09/17/09
Trying to breastfeed your baby while not giving her the chicken pox virus while dealing with the pain of SHINGLES! Can't say I blame her one bit for saying, "Fuck it. Where is my money, haters!"
If I start my own blog, it's good to know I should use double-Os in the title. Goop. Dooce. Rooby de la Booby.
09/17/09
I'm in the public eye (on the radio) and have never, and probably will never get used to how easily people express hatred towards those they've never even met. To me it's always spoken volumes bout how they feel about themselves.
And then I imagine saying, "do I call you at work and tell you how to flip the burgers?"
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09/17/09
OK, I was projecting obvy.
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09/17/09
I used to like her writing, but within the past couple years? Not so much. But the thing is, I can't pinpoint why. I've had this discussion with others and the attention she gets is only part of it.
After some thought, I don't think she is *IS* relateable at this point. Is she honest? Sure. Does she tell everyday stories? Well, I haven't looked in awhile...but I'll assume she still does. But...there got to be a point where things got less everyday, and a bit more frustrating. I don't know if its telling stories about her influence or talking about how the blog that she wasn't even writing daily was making her a lot of money...but I can't relate with that. And I certainly can't relate to getting thousands of followers kissing my butt in comments. No, really.
I mean, any blogger says stuff I don't always agree with and others agree with. That's fine, whatever. But a lot of people are talking about the mean comments...I mean, those seem like the minority compared to the many many many people saying "OMG I LOVE YOU YOU ARE TEH AWESOME DOOCE I WORSHIP YOU I AM A FELLOW MOM CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU ON OPRAH!"
I guess what I'm getting with is I can't relate at all with someone who is rich as the result of a blog, seems to be mostly loved, and I'm rubbed even more the wrong way by making money off hate mail. She clearly has the right to do whatever she wants, I'm not denying that. But i see her as less of a "regular person" and more like a less glitzy version of some "celebs" who are famous for doing nothing. Perhaps its airing of her own dirty laundry, but to me personally? Its not a ton different than Paris Hilton profiting off a sex tape. Its just a different context: you put yourself out there, you find a way to make it work...then you don't really have to put out a lot of effort in order to be rich and famous. (yes, yes, sex tape versus airing personal stuff. I know. not the same thing. but either way? its just not my cup of tea and i prefer not to contribute to either of their giant paychecks.)
I realize this may sound harsh, but I just can't think of a less harsh way to put it. And no, I'm not going to leave any hate mail for her.
09/17/09
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09/17/09
Obviously, not everyone can afford the help option, and Armstrong's very fortunate to be paid as well as she is (and to be able to work at home doing something she loves, as am I), but it's not like she's sitting on her ass eating bonbons. She's running a small business, and now that business has an employee. If she worked out of an office and had an assistant, would you be so offended?
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09/18/09
@cirocco: Girlfriend has a job, which she does from her home. The dress code is pretty relaxed, but the impression she gives on her site is that she and her husband work pretty effing hard to keep their blogs up and running, plus various side projects. Anyone familiar with the internet probably realizes that actually making money off a site requires a lot of planning and hard work. So she has an assistant. And? My mom is a legal assistant and SHE has a secretary. Why is it weird for dooce to have one?
And seriously? About the washer? They saved up to get a really good one, like many families might choose to do. And then it broke multiple times, and the companies involved in the transaction refused to fix it in any reasonable amount of time, SEVERAL TIMES. Just because she's famous and influential and awesome doesn't mean she doesn't deserve a working home appliance. If the same thing had happened to me, I would have been screaming about how the CEO of Maytag could shove my non-working washer up his ass. The only difference is that Dooce complained and several million people read it. Big whoop.
09/20/09
And... most moms don't. I have no beef with Armstrong or her success. I just think it's disingenuous to pretend that her experience of motherhood is ordinary. It's fundamentally different, due to the cash flow and extra help.
Kate Harding above asked "If she worked out of an office and had an assistant, would you be so offended?" That's a spurious question. No one here has declared themselves offended. I think it's great that the Armstrongs have built a thriving business out of what was once a liability ("Dooce" first came on my radar when Armstrong was fired from a previous job for blogging--specifically, for saying nasty things about her colleagues.) Some of us just don't understand how other moms can relate to her. She has a cushion of wealth and assistance that other mothers don't.
I know some people hate her out of envy. I am not one of them. I just don't understand her appeal to the average struggling mother.
09/17/09
Personally, her issues are not my issues. I couldn't care less about her latest pregnancy or what her kids just pooped.
But I don't see how anyone can deny that she is a solid confessional writer, and great at marketing, both of which I do respect.
09/17/09
Nope, you're not alone. Her name was vaguely familiar when I read this post and I've never read her. Couldn't care less.
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09/17/09
BUT. The flipside of that is that she's been doing this for like 8 or 9 fucking years (which also partially accounts for the insanely huge readership), which demonstrates unbelievable dedication. I've only been blogging since 2007 (late 2005 if you count my meandering personal blog that no one read), and I have had more OMG I AM BREAKING UP WITH THE INTERNET FOREVER moments than I can count. She's also obviously got a load of business savvy, design skills, PR skills, photography skills and dog-training skills, on top of serious writing talent. And of course, she started out with little direct competition because she had the ovaries to go first, to just try this crazy blogging thing and see what happened. It took me years and an MFA before I got up the courage -- and frankly, I'm glad I didn't start a blog as early as she did, because my current blog would now be nothing but apologies for the stupid shit I wrote when I was younger.
So. Are there people out there who are as good as her and not getting anywhere near the attention? Sure. Is that, to some extent, a matter of luck, timing, and privilege? Sure. But I have no problem saying all those things and saying she damn well worked her butt off and earned it. So it irritates me like mad when people completely dismiss the second part. (Which is not what you did. I'm just ranty.)
09/17/09
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09/17/09
All bloggers are in some area - egotistical and even a little self-centered. I mean, look at everyone with a Live Journal / Word Press / Facebook. So that doesn't bother me.
So, take the lemons - make lemonade.
09/17/09
And I think the what you just said has been said about all writers. I think its a true, too.
09/17/09