Jezebel: hate the parents

Courteney Cox Spends Quality Time With Daughter Coco (20+ Feet Behind Her)

Jennifer — Tue, 03 Jul 2007 17:25:35 EDT

[Malibu, CA; July 3. Image via X17]

Apple Martin: Still The Only Redeeming Thing About Gwyneth Paltrow

Anna — Tue, 29 May 2007 13:57:44 EDT

[Los Angeles, Calif; May 27. Image via x17.]
We don't mean it to be celebrity baby-worship day at Jezebel. [Perhaps we're ovulating! -Ed.] But this picture of Apple Martin came across the wires over the weekend and we couldn't let it pass without comment. We love this photo for two reasons. One, Apple is adorable. Two, she's the daughter of Gwyneth Paltrow, who gives us the major shits, as we've outlined in detail before. And we can't pass up the opportunity to say so again.

Earlier: Jennifer Garner's Daughter Violet Catches Some Air
Related: Hating Gwyneth Paltrow

Hate The Parents: Coco Cox Arquette

Anna — Thu, 05 Apr 2007 21:15:55 EDT

We don't really "hate" Courteney Cox and David Arquette. We're just mildly annoyed by them (bad acting on Dirt on her part; awful, look-at-me outfits on his). But we kinda love their daughter Coco. There's that top-knot, for starters. The kind-of-age-inappropriate aqua sunglasses. (What is she, three? Four?). The adorable Mary Janes-with-socks action.

We also love a little girl who knows how to throw a fit (if she's like other rich American girls, she'll sublimating her rage into eating disorders and obsessive shopping soon enough!). And in this pic, Coco is definitely having none of something. (That something would be: Waiting for her car at The Four Seasons in Beverly Hills).

[Image via Splash News]

Hate The Parents: Lynne & Jamie Spears; Jack Birch

Anna — Tue, 27 Mar 2007 13:59:09 EDT

Finally: Someone calls out Britney Spears' parents for their part in her breakdown, and it's none other than big-mouthed ~~Billy Bass~~ comedienne Sandra Bernhard. Bernhard is reportedly railing against Lynne and Jamie Spears, blaming them for Britney's struggles of late. Says Sandra: "I think she was basically co-opted by her parents at a very young age, forced into this business. And it's not completely her fault that she's flipping out....Having an eight year old kid myself and knowing the vulnerability of a child and being thrown into that disgusting, slimy world of Disney. I mean I can't think of a more horrible thing to do to your child."

Neither can we, unless of course, you're Jack Birch, actress Thora Birch's father (and an actor who appeared in famous '70s blue movie Deep Throat). According to Page Six, the elder Birch insisted on being present during a sex scene starring his 25-year-old daughter and actor Dean Winters on the Schenectady set of the film drama The Winter of Frozen Dreams. "It was so wrong. The director is saying, 'Harder! Faster!' and the father is giving Winters the thumbs up," a source said, adding, ""It was the most bizarre, perverse scene. One girl on the crew broke down crying."

Comedienne Blames Britney's Parents For All Her Troubles [YahooNewsIndia]
Dad Crashes Star's Sex Shoot [NYPost]