According to The Times of London's Luisa Metcalfe:

The lure of meeting a dashing, über- intelligent Ivy League educated male like Barack Obama, Jake Gyllenhaal or GG's aspiring Dartford College [???] student Dan Humphrey - along with financial incentives and the promise of an elite education - is encouraging an increasing number of female school-leavers to shun Oxbridge and apply to America's top universities

We all know the sole draw of certain U.S. institutions is not resources, international stature or, God forbid, education. It's about snagging one of your very own Ivy League gentleman — the most prestigious form of M.R.S. degree. (Nevermind the British men who might come here too. It's a feminine invasion!) So what are these Adonises really like?

Adam Peterson acknowledges that this propensity for superiority is a downfall of his fellow Ivies, "the greatest thing they need to battle is losing the common touch. When you go to a dinner party and someone tells you how they speak Russian, Arabic and spend their time in Timbuktu, it will probably be an Ivy Leaguer. And it's not inter-personally attractive."

But seriously, you could consider it a refreshing change that men too are said to lose their attractiveness if they lack a "common touch." It's better than the idea that the women who actually enroll as equals alongside these geniuses face a life of working overtime to not intimidate potential mates. While I was at one of these august institutions, I wrote a somewhat uneven piece on guys who went off campus to impress girls on the basis of their SAT scores, and the women who went out of their way to do essentially the opposite. A few years later, I remain hopeful that power-couple-hungry mutual elitism can trump gender hierarchies. So, my British sisters, come on down.

Ivy League Men Attract Female Students To The US [Times of London]

The pictures in question were taken over the summer, and showed the pretending to kiss or lick "novelty phallus-shaped lollipops." Other images showed the girls in their underwear with dollar bills sticking out. The ACLU has become involved in the case, and they claim that since the incident occurred outside school, it should not effect their standing. •  A new study from Britain's Department of Health has found that new mothers feel most anxious around five months after giving birth. At this point, the excitement has supposedly worn off, and friends and relatives are supposedly no longer offering as much support, which leads many mothers to feel isolated and nervous. • Nutrition experts have complained that Kellogg's is falsely advertising that its Cocoa Krispies cereal can help "boost immunity." Currently, the Cocoa Krispies box reads: ""Now helps support your child's IMMUNITY," alluding to the addition of vitamins A, C and E. But Kelly Brownell from Yale University says, "by their logic, you can spray vitamins on a pile of leaves, and it will boost immunity." • Researchers recently found that 1/5 of smokers lie about smoking during pregnancy. The study, which looked at 3,475 women from Scotland, asked women to come clean about lighting up while pregnant and followed up with the revealing blood tests. •  The Cyprus Feline Society has identified two breeds of cat that they claim are "ancient breeds" and would like international recognition for them. The two breeds include the tall and elegant "Aphrodite," and short, broad-faced "Helen." •  A professor at Harvard has announced that next semester he plans a class based entirely on the HBO show The Wire. "I do not hesitate to say that it has done more to enhance our understanding of the challenges of urban life and the problems of urban inequality, more than any other media event or scholarly publication," said sociology professor William J. Wilson at a recent panel discussion.  • A new study found that while marriage rates are lower for women on welfare, receiving Temporary Assistance for Needy Families, once they exit the system they are as likely to marry as women who were never on welfare. • International cancer specialists will meet this week to figure out how to combat the increase of breast cancer in developing countries, where almost two-thirds of women aren't diagnosed until the cancer has spread through their bodies. Doctors say part of the problem is that in some areas women worry that men will leave them if they lose a breast. "It's not a trivial consideration," says Dr. Lawrence Shulman of the Dana Farber Cancer Institute, who is working to begin cancer care in parts of Africa where "the women are often seen as really either vessels for producing children or as sex slaves." • A mother in New York is challenging a judge's decision to 34 percent increase in the number of Down Syndrome births between 1989 and 2005, 15 percent fewer babies were born during that time due to prenatal testing. Some are worried that the decline in Down Syndrome cases will lead to cuts in research funding and that more people aren't even considering raising a child with Down syndrome. • A Texas health clinic operator CareNow says it regrets telling a Muslim doctor applying for a job that she couldn't wear her hijab. The company called it a "misunderstanding" after the American-Islamic Relations wrote to CareNow, explaining federal law requires employers to reasonably accommodate religious practices of an employee. • Today Michelle Obama is launching a mentoring program in which she and female White House staffers will mentor 20 high school girls from the Washington, D.C. area. The girls will get to visit their mentors' offices and gather for a group dinner. • Despite Liz Lemon's well-known love of the German language, 30 Rock is not popular in Germany. Its premiere last night on the German channel ZDFNeo earned a 0.0 rating, meaning it was watched by fewer than 5,000 people. Blerg. •

This isn't university apparel: this is the Ivy League as metaphor. Harvard Yard is about turning the university's hard-earned but ephemeral reputation into a more useful kind of coin — the licensing deal, though of unknown value, lasts 10 years, covers the entire globe, and also gives permission for women's and children's apparel collections. Kit Walsh, an executive at the Collegiate Licensing Company, says "The idea was to create a line of clothing where Harvard represented not just a university, but a style, too."

And what a style it is.

We think this guy's definitely majoring in Advanced Mud Sculpture. The floral shirt speaks to a certain subversive aesthetic/isation of the American heterosexual male experience, but the rolled up sleeves say, "Baby, let's work this clay together."

This guy, on the other hand, is clearly majoring in Old World Inferiority Complex Studies. Notice the striped blazer, an homage to the classic English boating jacket, and the attempt at keeping it cas' in white plimsolls. A not unusual reaction to feelings of geographic insecurity among the wealthiest classes.

Here, a Harvardite majoring in Cool Juice. Run — don't walk! — to class, Steve Urkel. You'll transform into Stefan Urquelle one day.

This guy's majoring in Young Republicanism with a minor in Sockless Living — Avoiding Blisters. Roger Stone dreams of taking him shopping for a real suit.

And here lurks the soulful Studio Art/Independent Studies major. Look at him gaze into the middle distance as he contemplates with exquisite melancholy how everyone around him is like totally a late-capitalist consumer clone, man, while his forebrain wonders if perhaps he can justify charging another ribbon belt this month.

Harvard Yard apparel will retail for $165-$495, and will be available in stores next spring.

Rich Harvard, Poor Harvard [Vanity Fair]
Harvard University Launches Men's Collection [WWD]

She does say, though, that race as well as class affect "how my peers perceive me and how my school has treated me." She also says she still hopes to graduate, though Harvard has yet to explain its requirement that she leave campus, and she is currently back in Brooklyn. Campbell maintains that she never dealt drugs or even knew Cosby, and she is disappointed that the case has attracted negative attention to her neighborhood of Bedford-Stuyvesant. "I love where I come from," she explains. "I love being 'from the hood.'"

However, she has also found refuge in Italy, where she traveled four times during her years at Harvard. She says "Italy was a place I could be without all of the pressures" of school and of being judged for her background. Kareem Fahim of the Times writes that Italy offered her "a supportive black community of expatriate Americans and Africans." It's a shame that Harvard, which has been trying to improve its economic as well as its racial diversity, couldn't offer her a supportive community as well.

UPDATE: Black Harvard students speak on why they haven't come out in support of Campbell.

Turmoil at End of Path From Bed-Stuy to Harvard [New York Times]
Harvard Targets Middle Class With Student Cost Cuts [Bloomberg]
Why Black Harvard Won't Speak Up For Chanequa [NewsOne]

Earlier: Harvard Senior Accused Of Involvement In Murder Accuses School Of Racism

Justin Cosby, a Cambridge resident and suspected pot dealer, was fatally wounded on May 18th during what police believe was a robbery gone awry. He was shot in the stomach in Kirkland House, a university dormitory, but he managed to run out into the street before collapsing. He died several hours later in the hospital.

Jordan Copney, a professional songwriter from New York, has been charged with his murder, the Times of London reports. It is believed that Copney targeted Cosby because he was carrying a large stash of marijuana and $1,000 in cash. Copney allegedly knew Cosby through two girls who attended Harvard: his girlfriend, and her close friend, Campbell. Police say that Cosby sold drugs to the Harvard students, including the two girls reportedly involved in the shooting.

Prosecutors believe that Cosby was "visiting friends on the campus" when he was confronted by Copney, who had traveled to campus with the express purpose of robbing Cosby. It is unknown how Copney gained access to the dormitory, but police believe that Campbell loaned him her security pass, an allegation that Campbell thoroughly denies. Once Copney was in the building, he approached Cosby, and "during the course of the confrontation, multiple shots were fired. One of those shots struck Cosby, resulting in his death."

The Boston Globe reports that although Campbell admits that she knew Copney through his girlfriend, she maintains that she was not involved in the murder in any way. Campbell claims she was taking a final when the alleged robbery occurred, and she never lent her security pass to Copney. She also makes the distinction that she lives in Kirkland annex, not Kirkland House, which is where the shooting took place. "I have no knowledge of anything that happened, none whatsoever," Campbell said. However, Harvard has taken action against Campbell, banning her from campus and barring her from participating in graduation.

Campbell has publicly stated that she believes she is the victim of racism:

Asked why she believes Harvard administrators took the actions they did, she said she was not making an "overall claim of racism," but "I do believe I am being singled out. . . . The honest answer to that is that I'm black and I'm poor and I'm from New York and I walk a certain way and I keep my clothes a certain way," she said. "It's something that labels me as different from everyone else."

Campbell's claims are not without precedent. Last month, Harvard held a panel to look into whether campus police unfairly stopped black students because of their race, reports the Associated Press - which also puts the percent of African-American, admitted students at 11%:

In 2004, police stopped and questioned a prominent black Harvard professor who matched a robbery suspect's description. Then, in 2007, police responding to noise complaints asked leaders of black student groups holding a field day on campus to show their Harvard IDs.

Last year, a black campus worker who lost his bicycle lock key said an officer drew a gun on him after he tried to cut the lock off.

The panel found that they needed to do more work in order to create a "welcoming environment at the school."

During a phone call monitored by her attorney, Campbell told the New York Post that she is "hurt and I'm confused, for me not to be graduating is frustrating." She also said that she had never seen Cosby before, and she doesn't know why she is the only one being asked to leave campus. "This is incredibly hurtful to know it's only me that has been kicked off campus," Campbell said. "I'm feeling I'm being scapegoated and I can't defend myself."

Campbell's lawyer, Jeffrey Karp, says that Harvard has not yet disclosed their reason for barring Campbell from graduating, but he hopes he will be able to work out a deal that will allow her to participate in the ceremony. "Harvard is being cold and callous," he said. "What they have done to Chanequa is equivalent to having your house foreclosed and losing your job on the same day."

Student Says Harvard Is Wrongly Linking Her To Campus Murder [Boston Globe]
Harvard Accused Of Racism After Expelling Student Over Campus Killing [Times]
Brooklyn Harvard Student Chenequa Campbell Barred From Campus During Murder Investigation [New York Post]
Black Harvard Student: Racism Part Of Campus Ban [AP]

She writes:

My parents met in 1966 through the world's first computer-dating service. I am the second of their four children, and they have been married for nearly 40 years.

Horn's parents used the Operation Match program on a Harvard University IBM 7090. College students around the U.S. could fill out a questionnaire and mail it (along with a $3 fee), and the computer would provide five or more "compatible matches" within the student's geographic area. Horn's parents were attending different colleges in Philadelphia and had no mutual friends or contacts. Her father got a list of six "compatible" women; her mother got a list of men. (She was not, of course, expected to call the strange men, but to wait for them to call her.) Not only did Horn's dad call her mom — he went out with all of the ladies on his list. But what really strikes Horn as interesting is the idea that at the time, people believed technology to be infallible. Both of her parents had "perfect faith that modern science could do no wrong" Horn adds: "As my mother put it: 'This was the ultimate science, the highest technology. The list of matches even came as a computer printout! Who could dispute it?'"

Now that we've been living with technology for decades, we know that computers have glitches; they crash and get viruses. We don't trust much of what we see online, and everyday there's a new reason why we shouldn't. But: While we still use computers to communicate with people — via dating sites, MySpace, Facebook or Meetup — Horn thinks we rarely break the ice and talk to strangers: "We have the technology, but we no longer have the guts," Horn says. "Despite our increasingly busy lives, meeting people isn't ultimately the hard part. Perceiving the possibility of happiness is." Here's where I disagree. Isn't the computer just a tool for fostering relationships? Don't people find the "guts" to go from online to IRL chatting all the time? Haven't we all done it before? If not for a date, then for cocktails and dreams, or some other reason?

The Ghost In The Love Machine [WSJ]

[Cambridge, Massachusetts; February 5. Image via Getty]

CAMBRIDGE, MA - FEBRUARY 5: Renee Zellweger performs a skit with Harvard University student Chris Schleicher Feburary 5, 2009 during the Hasty Pudding Awards annual Woman of the Year Parade in Cambridge, Massachusetts. Each year the awards are given to performers who have made a lasting and impressive contribution to the world of entertainment by the Hasty Pudding Theatricals at Harvard University.(Photo by Darren McCollester/Getty Images)

• Once upon a time in a universe far, far away, a group of supposely intelligent women decided that Barack Obama wasn't sexy enough for them. And thus the world was denied his image in a Harvard Law beefcake calendar. I guess we'll always have People. [Politico]
• Obama has told people he wants Lieberman to continue to caucus with the Dems, something Lieberman is swearing that he won't do if Democrats take his committee assignment away. Let the whiny bitch go, please. "No drama Obama" doesn't have to mean rolling over for Lieberman. [Huffington Post]
• Speaking of the Senate, the difference between Norm Coleman and Al Franken in the Minnesota Senate race is down to 204 votes. One more reason to cut the dead weight, Harry Reid. [MSNBC]

• There's a fake guy who claims to be the one who told Fox News that Sarah Palin didn't know about NAFTA. He claims to be best buds with Randy Scheunemann and "added" that she didn't know the difference between Hezbollah and Hamas, Sunnis and Shi'ites or the IRA and ETA. [Politico, Fake Martin Eisenstadt]
• None of that will delay the start of Palin's comeback tour, which begins this week at the Republican Governor's Association in Miami. [Washington Post]
• She's headed there once she's done sorting through her massive wardrobe to find the clothes the RNC desperately needs back. You know, the clothes she never wore that lived in the belly of the campaign plane after the convention. Those clothes. [Associated Press]
• Howard Dean is going to leave the DNC. [Washington Post]
• Former DNC Chair Terry McAuliffe is going to run for Governor of Virginia. [Politico]
• And everyone in the world is calling Obama on the phone, including Russian Putin-puppet President Dmitry Medvedev. No wonder he always has the thing up to his ear when he's getting out of a car lately! [Washington Post]

Yeah, same old issues. But a new study by UC Berkeley's Haas School of Business found that MBAs were more likely to drop out of the workforce than doctors or lawyers. Why?

It's not because of education: All of the 1,000 participants in the survey went to Harvard. It's not age: All were 37 years old and had at least one child. The difference was in the workplace. A third of the women with MBAs became stay-at-home moms; compared to 6% of MDs. Could it be that doctors often work in private practice and can make their own hours? Could it be that a business environment is not family-friendly? Would it help if there were more women in business, thereby forcing companies to become flexible or lose valuable employees? But why would more women go into business when clearly women in business have a tough time? It's a catch-22. (Would some sort of Title IX help?) I'm reminded of something I read recently, in which the author suggested that the reason the comments on this site are so witty and funny is because women are underutilized at their jobs. Maybe it's not just businesses — maybe the entire concept of a "workforce" needs to be overhauled?

Working Moms Look Back With Mixed Emotions [CNN]
More Women With MBAs Take Mommy-Track Than Doctors: Study [Reuters]

Related: Government Officials: Should Title IX Apply To Science Departments?
On Jezebel's Fine Lines Series and Spunky Female Protagonists [South In The Winter]

Earlier: Many Women Prefer Stay At Home Motherhood To Soulless Cubicle Dwelling

Some reporter interviewed you about the improvement in metabolism in the lab mice. You said,

"I think it's an important result because not only does it say that not all fat is bad, but I think it points to a special aspect of fat where we need to do more research."

Love,
Kim Kardashian.

Scientists Find Something Good About A Big Bottom [Reuters]

The foundation of Aliza's outfit is, naturally, built upon the shopping mecca of aspiring hipster poseurs everywhere: American Apparel. Below, the leggings, scoop-neck leotard and black hoody.

(Unisex flex fleece zip hoody, $40; cotton spandex jersey legging, $26; jersey short sleeve t-shirt leotard, $28.)

And her boots? White fringe stylings are something that could only be found at a place called the Boot Barn.

(Oak Tree Farm "Oasis" fringe boot, $89.99)

And don't forget the hair! This Beverly Johnson wig in Shade 4 ought to do the trick.

(H-214 by Beverly Johnson wig, $45.90)

But to really encapsulate Aliza-style, you've gotta rock the baggy leopard-print short. Where to go? The men's underwear section of WildFree, naturally.

(Wild Free men's lingerie silk leopard-print boxer shorts, $24)

Related: Shvarts Explains Her 'Repeated Self-Induced Miscarriages [Yale Daily News]

There are no facts, only interpretations, and if you comprehend an interpretation to its very depths you're likely to change your mind about it, as I have on occasion on this blog when challenged on one of the metaphors, metonyms and anthroporphisms marching around in the mobile mind army of thoughts and variables I falsely perceive to make up some sort of truth, which you may perceive to be a long-winded preamble to telling you I received an email Wednesday evening from a certain individual I'd described upon very little scrutiny as "amusingly pretentious," in a post of earlier this week. Was it unfair? Why not leave judgment to the herd?

from [Redacted] xxxxxxxx@fas.harvard.edu> to moetkacik@gmail.com, date Wed, Apr 9, 2008 at 6:00 PM subject Amusingly pretentious mailed-by gmail.com signed-by gmail.com hide details Apr 9 (2 days ago) Reply

Hi Moe,

Nice to meet you in NYC last weekend! Just out of curiosity, what did I do
to merit the label "amusingly pretentious"?

Cheers,

[Redacted]
______________________________________
[Name Redacted]
Ph.D. Candidate, Harvard University

37 Charles St., Apt. 6B
Boston, MA 02114

Phone: 617-555-9808
Cell: 203-555-7890

"When one rows it is not the rowing which
moves the ship: rowing is only a magical
ceremony by means of which one compels
a demon to move the ship." -Nietzsche
______________________________________

BY THE WAY GUYS, I CHANGED ALL HIS INFORMATION AND EVEN IF I HADN'T I DON'T THINK NIETZSCHE BELIEVED IN MORALS BUT WHATEVS.

"I just have a huge amount of frustration with guys," he told the Times. "They need to know that so much hurt can come from the lack of respect for women."

Dear Moe,

Here are some explanations of the conversation that I actually had with Randall, and the understanding that he surely had, but didn't present in writing. The main problem with the article is that it presents only the fact of sexual arousal and temptation, and says nothing about the degree. I carefully explained to Randall that almost all men in our culture live at a hyper-stimulated level of sexual arousal, fed by pornography, their own fantasy, advertising, women's fashion choices, etc. Almost everyone knows that men are "horny," but what they don't realize is that it's not a natural state. When you stop pouring gasoline on the fire, as it were, it goes down to a manageable level. Living a chaste lifestyle means not drooling over every attractive woman you see, fantasizing whenever something crosses your mind, and watching pornography. The sexual input is minimal, and so it is easy to live with it from day to day, so that you're not pulled around by your nose. It's an incredibly liberating and hopeful message for men, because they feel like they have no possibility of controlling their sexuality, when in reality it's entirely possible.

About the way that he manipulated the quotations from me: describing my lust as an "untamed beast" was a comment on the nature of lust itself, not the strength of my own. It's untamed precisely because it is lust, and if given free rein it considers nothing but its own gratification. It seeks to use another person to gain personal pleasure, which is why you have to take away constant fuel for it if you want to love and respect women for who they are, and not just how they turn you on. Also, the ways in which things like a touch, a glance, or a random thought can bring arousal is simply an observation about manners in which it can happen. The actual occurence of such stimulation goes down at the same rate as the willful input of lustful stimulation, and while such things (like a thought) may occur regularly, they rarely bring any arousal at all if you learn to let go of them and ignore them—like a fly buzzing around. Basically, it's not a huge deal! I'm frustrated that Randall didn't make any of this clear, because I said all of this to him, and more. It would have been easy for him to pain a picture of me as someone who had fought a battle and emerged free, happy, and comfortable with his sexuality, but instead he makes me seem like a repressed weirdo. All this does is perpetuate the myth that men have no choice except to be horny, and if you act like I do then you'll go crazy and salivate at every little thing that crosses your path. Our culture so badly needs role models of the opposite lifestyle.

Oh, and on another note—Janie was laughing when she was asked about being attracted to me! Lol, we both found it a funny question, but he totally changed it in the article. And we weren't supposed to smile in the photos either—somebody commented on that, lol. They said that Janie and I should smile more and lighten up!

Everything above is what I wrote, so if you could write up something to append to your blog, I would be very grateful.

Peace,

Leo

The one great difference between them seemed to be in their experience of abstinence. Fredell was unaware of that gap. Whenever sexual urges struck, she told me, she was able to manage them by going on a long run and assumed that everyone should be able to do the same. "The biological drive can be overcome," she said. "It's not like it reaches a peak, and you have to go out and have sex."

"And you don't go down the street thinking you'd like to have sex with him, him, him and him?" I asked.

"No!" she said, abruptly. "Is that what men do?"

It seemed a good time to talk with her about what else Keliher had told me. He described the act he has never experienced as something "breathtakingly powerful" that "lights all of your body on fire." He spoke of his lust as "this untamed beast."

Fredell was incredulous: "Leo said that?"

He told me that he struggles constantly against "physical lustful temptation" — that he can be aroused just by a woman's touch, by even a look at a woman or at a photo or sometimes by "thoughts that just come out of the blue — basically pornography in my head." They come to him when he's merely walking around campus, or even when he's alone in the library — "like a fly buzzing around."

To the matter of masturbation, he said, "This was really tough for me . . . because when you have a habit that's so deeply ingrained, it's hard to stop."

Fredell, when asked about masturbation, just said, "Oh, God, no!"

Keliher quoted to me what an abstinence speaker said — that the real meaning of masculinity is "being able to deny yourself for the sake of the woman." "To have that kind of self-control is really what it means to be a man," Keliher had told me. When he finds himself aroused these days, he endures it and waits for it to pass. In this way, he said he has "matured out of that more infantile need for a woman into a recognition of self-sufficiency." But some women, Keliher granted, continue to give him trouble.
One of these is a freshman — "a very gentle, caring soul," he said, who "works with little kids and stuff." Keliher can't help thinking about her glossy hair and beautiful skin.

Another appears to be Janie Fredell. Keliher smiled and said he was "a little bit" attracted to her — "in very superficial ways," he added. "It's something we laugh about — if we dated."

But Fredell did not laugh. "No!" she erupted, and with increasing volume, "No! No! No! I can't emphasize enough that there is nothing between me and Leo! It's just that we're not compatible in that regard."

Or actually, that is a lie, taking yourself too seriously is up there with "presumptuousness" when it comes to achieving things I guess, so what do I know; I'm still with Lena, for whatever it's worth.

Students Of Virginity [NY Times]

MEGAN: So, apparently, fidelity is just a big fat lie for everyone now.

MOE: It's biology!
Don't you love political sex scandal-pegged science stories?

MEGAN: Best pun by a scientist ever: "Infants have their infancy; adults, adultery."
But can we have a moment of silence for the end of my nascent crush on brand new NY Governor David Paterson?

MOE: Did you like the detail about how he took the mistress to Day's Inn, but he's also taken his wife to the same Day's Inn? Here she is. Isn't she a beauty? Though to be fair, I've stayed in places about four diamond ratings beneath that place in this town. And I have, like, 20/30 vision.

MEGAN: Like, ok, this I need to understand. Why if he and his wife live in Harlem, did he take her to the Days Inn to fuck her? Like, that's about 30 blocks from the Harlem line, right? So it's not even very far.

Like, I can totally see taking your mistress there, but your wife?

MOE: Yeah I lived in Harlem. That's like a two and a half mile walk and I lived up at 149th.
I bet the fuckin marriage counselor recommended it.

MEGAN: Oh, God, you're so totally right. Men are creatures of habit. He was probably like, I had a ton of great sex in that hotel, I'll just go back there! Rather than, like, shelling out for the W or something.
David, I have seen your wife. She deserved some high thread count sheets and strawberries and champagne from room service, I'm just sayin'.

MOE: I bet you can get "room service" from that hotel. It just comes from the local diner and they will totally mess up your order but as a plus they'll charge you $7.95, no matter what you got. I wonder if the Day's Inn is one of those hotels where there is a microwave in every room and free microwave popcorn with an advertisement for a Grey Line Bus tour on the packaging.

Soooooo...should we talk about Pastor KKKRazy?

MEGAN: Ah, The Reverend Not-Wright

MOE: The Reverend Wright wing conspiracy!
According to Fox News, he's sorta like Hitler.
Hitler did some great things1

MEGAN: Well, he does have a 'stache, I guess that seals it. I mean, except for the whole part where he's black and stuff.

MOE: He fixed the economy!

MEGAN: By starting a war!

MOE: Yeah well! Nicer guys have tried that and failed!

MEGAN: Well, several years into Hitler's war the economy in Germany tanked, too. Apparently, it's not that great for the economy unless you win and stuff.

MOE: So anyway, Obama is supposed to address the problem of the pastor who changed his life being some sort of Stalinist Che Guevara Islamofascist black supremacist firebrand and it's happening this morning at the Constitution Center in Philadelphia, which is only about two blocks away from my old apartment (sigh!) and I hope they air it on Fox News because, for one, the sound isn't working on any of my other news channels and two, I love Fox News. They just interviewed Mr. Feeley from Mr. Roger's Neighborhood. Can you IMAGINE naming a character on a kid's show "Mr. Feeley" now? No! It's unthinkable! Anyway, let's really get into the Pastor Wright thing. I feel like no one in the media has a real opinion about this guy because everyone has had at least one boyfriend who has made more ridiculous utterances and, you know, it's not like Obama touched dicks with this dude. On the other hand, he's supposed to be some sort of spiritual adviser. But, like, "spiritual adviser" — what do any of us know about that? So we're all circling around one another, trying to figure out whether anyone cares, whether this is going to totally sink his campaign or just fly over their heads and... and...I still don't know what I think.

In other news, Obama has a black Chinese math nerd brother by another mother. Maybe if the Dalai Lama steps down the Chinese government can make him the official reincarnated Dalai Lama.

MEGAN: Well, CNN keeps running the clip where he says that Hillary Clinton doesn't know what it's like to be a black man in a country run by rich white people and I'm sort of failing to see that as being controversial. Are we arguing that the country isn't run by rich white people? The median income in this country is less than $45,000 a year and Congressmembers make more than $150,000 and the President makes more than $200,000.
Well, but the Dalai Lama would still be the Dalai Lama, only he just wouldn't be the political-leader-in-exile anymore.
MOE: No but he's apparently going to step down from his exiled title if the violence doesn't stop.
I'm not sure what the succession plan is but I would really love it if it involved an Obama.

MEGAN: That would be too much for me to handle in the morning.
MOE: I do love how Roger Cohen paints the picture of this guy as a "potential problem" for Obama. Because the Clinton clan is full of such upstanding citizens.

MEGAN: Lovely people, even.

MOE: Anyway, so...what is the worst thing this guy Wright has said anyway? "God Damn America" or that the government created AIDS? Did you ever date one of those guys who told you crack cocaine was invented in a CIA lab? Because I have. And this was before Wikipedia, so I finally had to Nexis the fucking story and all the ensuing retractions to shut him the hell up. Not that I really felt like defending the CIA! But the thing is, it took a lot of time for me to get it up to want to refute any of the retarded things he said, even though I loved him, and I sort of feel like that must be Obama's thing, like...blah blah blah. Anyway, as it turns out it doesn't seem like Obama spent that much time in church anyway.

MEGAN: Oh, but he used to say he went every week! I can't say that I dated a guy who thought crack cocaine was a CIA plot against white people (although, hello? FBI would've made more sense conspiracy theorists) but I've definitely heard it and it totally still holds sway among many people in this country. And, hell, fucking South African President Thabo Mbeki thinks we hatched AIDS to keep Africans from breeding and shit, so, you know, apparently it's pretty widely believed that we're coordinated and shit.

MOE: Oh man I just rewound my Fox and they were interviewing that black republican ex Lt Governor of Maryland and he was talking about how a "spiritual adviser" is a really important force in your life, he knows because he used to be in a monastery. Um, was Barack Obama in a monastery? Because I don't remember that part. It's like his Chinese African brother! (Oh my god, Chinese African! Do you think he is involved in Sudanese blood oil??) Anyway, whatevs! I'm about to change the subject. Can you handle this?
I actually read almost the entire account of the Week That Shook Wall Street and I have a takeaway.
MEGAN: Wow, no wonder we got started late. That's longer than Crappy Hour itself!

MOE:

Chief Executive Officer Alan Schwartz was out of pocket. Although Bear Stearns had been struggling with mortgage-related losses and problems in its wealth-management unit, Mr. Schwartz was hosting a Bear Stearns media conference in Palm Beach, Fla. On Wednesday morning, he left the conference briefly to do an interview with CNBC in an effort to deflect rumors about liquidity issues at the firm.

Steve Black, co-head of J.P. Morgan's investment bank, returned early from vacation in the Caribbean, spearheading the bank's efforts with his J.P. Morgan counterpart in London, Bill Winters. Mr. Black's role was pivotal. He was a longtime associate of J.P. Morgan Chief Executive James Dimon. And Mr. Black had a long relationship with Bear's CEO, Mr. Schwartz, dating back to the 1970s, when the two were fraternity brothers at Duke University.

At 5 a.m. Friday, Mr. Geithner, Mr. Paulson and Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke, calling in from home, joined a conference call to debate whether Bear should be allowed to fail or whether the Fed should lend it enough money to get through the weekend. At 7 a.m. they settled on the lifeline option.

• DKNY Jeans has announced a "partnership" with Rachel Bilson, who will be doing her own denim line for the brand. "Fans of 'The O.C.' really like DKNY Jeans, and I know they make great stuff, so I thought it could be good... I can't draw at all, so I won't be doing any sketches, but I am learning to sew," she says. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Good for designer Bradley Bayou for organizing a forum on the fashion industry and eating disorders. Bayou said fashion editors and the CFDA are at great fault for the growing number of young women developing eating disorders: "We have girls getting very sick because they can't beat the system and look like what's on the cover of the magazine...There are two ways to become a size zero: Starve yourself or take drugs. Or both. And yes, [models] all do it." [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• "She is a very modest woman." That's Fashion Fringe co-founder Colin McDowell on Donatella Versace. Um, sure. [Fashion Week Daily]

• Guess: Launching an eco-friendly capsule collection in April. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Make your own score for Miuccia Prada's trippy and twisted animated short "Trembling Blossoms" on Prada.com. [WWD, 1st item]
• Not gonna lie: I sorta want a Jean-Michel Basquiat Uniqlo t-shirt. [WWD, 2nd item]
• Alber Elbaz has started designing bridal for the House of Lanvin under the label Collection Blanche which — oh the irony — contains very few white dresses. [Vogue UK]
• The 2008 international fur and leather exhibition, Mifur, will be paying special homage to the late fashion designer Gianfranco Ferre, who loved him an animal pelt like it was nobody's business. [Fashion Week Daily]
• French Connection's profits are down 22% this year. FCUK! [Independent]
• Diddy vs. J.Lo: Battle of the fragrances! [BellaSugar]
• Henry Holland Easter eggs: Just what humanity needs. [Sassybella]
• What? Men do more shopping online than women? [WSJ]

As for men, Byron says, "It is far more important for male managers... to be seen as analytical, logical and good at reasoning." Who cares? An "understanding" boss is better, right? Wrong, according to a research by Harvard Business. Researcher Steve Kaplan found that CEO skills can be classified into two areas: "Hard" skills like aggressiveness, follow-through and speed; and "soft" skills like creativity, listening and team skills. Guess which set of skills were shared by highly successful CEOs? The aggro ones. "Our results do not necessarily mean that soft skills are unimportant," Kaplan says. So if you're a woman with "hard" skills, your employees hate you; if you're supportive and "soft,"you're going nowhere. Which would you rather? It all goes back to Machiavelli: Is it better to be loved or feared?

Female Bosses Evaluated As 'Office Moms' [MSNBC]
Harvard: "Hard" Skills Trump "Soft" Skills [Harvard Business, via BusinessWeek]