Unfortunately for, uh, all citizens of Earth, the Girls reality show is apparently underway: ABC has picked it up and already chosen a star, a 25-year-old publicist named Hailey Glassman whose achievements include, hand to God, dating Jon Gosselin and being on an episode of My Life is A Lifetime Movie. She's also…
- Reportedly, John Mellencamp (nee Cougar) has "struck up a friendship" with the actress, who has apparently "dropped in" on his tour. Mellencamp and his supermodel wife of 18 years, Elaine Mellencamp (nee Irwin), just announced they're splitting up. Oooh!
- January Jones claims she crashed into three parked cars last night because paparazzi were chasing her, but witnesses say she was alone — and smelled of alcohol. Also, in a bizarre twist, January called Bobby Flay to the scene.
- After roughly a year and a half of marriage, Heidi Montag has reportedly kicked Spencer Pratt (and, presumably, his crystals) to the curb:
Today in Tweet Beat, Elizabeth Taylor addresses rumors that she will marry for the ninth time, Hailey Glassman is looking forward to celebrating 4/20, and Marlon Wayans stands up for celebrity Twitter rights.
Today in Tweet Beat, Jim Carrey and Jenny McCarthy are "grateful" but not dating, Diablo Cody is pregs, and Michael Jackson's dermatologist claims that MJ didn't like to shoot up.
- Nicolette Sheridan is suing her former employer, Desperate Housewives creator Marc Cherry, claiming he physically abused her on the set.
- Today on Ryan Seacrest's radio show, Heidi Montag revealed that in addition to the 10 recent plastic surgery procedures we know about, she also had her waist cinched and her "back scooped." Wondering what that is? Heidi has no idea:
- Bruce Springsteen allegedly had an affair with a New Jersey housewife named Ann Kelly back in 2005; details of the affair are now beginning to surface thanks to divorce papers filed by Kelly's husband in March of last year.
- Jennifer Aniston and David Schwimmer are reportedly no longer talking after Aniston admitted while on The Late Show with David Letterman that she didn't know who Schwimmer's fiance was:
- According to an unconfirmed report on an unreliable website and repeated by a newspaper, Beyoncé is pregnant.
- This report claims that when Vanessa Paradis found out that her partner of 12 years, Johnny Depp, was supposed to shoot passionate love scenes with Angelina Jolie in The Tourist, she "ordered" him to quit the project.
Today in Tweet Beat, check out the girls of America's Next Top Model cycle 14. Also, Hailey Glassman makes fun of Jon Gosselin's penis size again, this time, with a picture. (Link NSFW and NSF souls!)