So. First things first! How the hell did you wind up in Yemen? And are you scared of Al Qaeda?
I am trying to think of how to best sum it up... I worked as a fashion editor in NYC for about 6 years and when 9/11 happened, I started wondering about Islam and why people hated the U.S. so much — I was not into interna'tl politics at ALL at that time — so I started studying Arabic and eventually left my job at the magazine I was working for (Good Housekeeping) and went to Cairo for 3 months. When I came back, I entered a grad program for journalism and tried to keep up with my Arabic study. So last summer I came to Yemen to do some intensive language courses and loved it before I finished my masters in Dec, I heard about an opportunity with the Yemen Times and I decided to take the job so I moved here for one year, beginning in January.

Ok, as for the evacuations: There have been a number of attacks on foreigners here starting last summer in July. Things were calm for a while but then recently there was a mortar attack on the US Embassy in the capital (Sana'a), and then about a week or so later, there was an attack on a residential facility that mainly housed oil workers and supposedly some diplomatic staff. After the residence attack, the US Embassy ordered all non-emergency staff to leave Yemen. Actually, many MANY people think that there will be a civil war here soon. It is kind of terrorism's last frontier- the gov't has a very shaky hold on power and there is now fighting going on in the North, the South and some central areas. Also, our gov't and the Yemeni gov't are having lots of problems right now since all the people that have been released from Guantanamo have been asked to sign papers saying that they will not carry out terrorist activities anymore. Obviously this ain't going over so well with in the States and now with the recent two attacks, the US is even more angry. So the rest of us Americans here are kind of waiting for our government to evacuate US any day now.

So does the United States think the ex-Guantanamo guys somehow spearheaded the recent attacks? Because Yemen has always been 1. somewhat out of control and 2. Al Qaeda friendly right? (I know 2 hijackers were apparently Yemeni, though they may have been Saudi born.) And...fuck. Tell me about where you worked in New York, and whether you miss it, and now that you're being evacuated and dodging mortarfire etc. etc. would you still tell anyone bored and unfulfilled at a fashion magazine to get the fuck out of New York and learn about the real world while they can?

Ha! Well, I still have lots of friends in that fashion-y/beauty world. But I find this a million times more fulfilling for sure. I think my daily life is a lot less 'sexy' than you might think, seriously! As for Al-Q, they have taken credit for all the attacks. And they are not only active but VERY popular here.

Really? But Yemen always seemed SO GLAMOROUS.

SUPER glam, let me tell you!

Do you chew qat? I've always wanted to chew that.

I am so impressed you know about it! I have, but I hate. And I hate what it does to this country.

Well it is really poor, right? Has the media interviewed a lot of the Guantanamo guys or are they allowed to talk?

Well, the ones that were released have kind of disappeared. but I think a few of them have spoke to media. Mostly Arabic-language sources though. The ones still at Gitmo are completely sealed off, cant even talk to their families. I talk to their lawyers pretty often though, since that's one of my beats

Is there oil there? Why is it so undeveloped? I have no concept of Yemen's history. But their oppression of women kind of makes you question all those theories about how rich natural resources are bad for economic diversification/women. Maybe just, women are screwed no matter what the natural resource situation?

Nutshell: it was a divided country until 1990 with a socialist-USSR-aligned south. and a religious, super poor north. Almost none of the country has oil but that hasn't stopped people from trying to dig. It is still REALLY divided in spirit. The British ruled the south until 1962 but mainly their economy is their paltry oil supply and qat which is sad.

Well I would buy some qat. is it legal here?

It is in fact not legal in the US and there was a big QAT ring (who knew?) that was busted last year in Dec! But that doesn't mean you can't try it anyway. It is also chewed in Ethiopia and Somalia and I think a few other countries as well. But it seriously is gross and tastes like hell, plus the high is not good. It's like being on a super-coffee high, and lots of people feel crazy/depressed afterwards. it makes you talk a lot (what I hear cocaine is like)

Ah, that's what I "hear" cocaine is like. So.... one thing I have been fascinated by is why Yemen doesn't seem to be in the news here more often. You have TERROR, after all.

Well, it's kind of a black hole. People don't know a lot about it and it's poor as all hell. It's like how our media covers Africa in a way. And things have been active lately but they were quiet for some years. I think it has to do with the government and Al-Qaeda trying to show people that the government is weak. There are always protests going on here and I thought I was going to be ambushed at one of the for the Gitmo (current) detainees. Some of the guys there were like, "You are Satan."

How are your living conditions? Do you live with other foreigners or in a university dorm or something? How much do you get paid and what is there to spend money on? What's it like to be a woman?

I get paid less than $500/month, but my rent in Yemen is SUPER low. There are a couple nice things to buy here, but not many. Yemen is great in lots of ways and that is def one of them. Some of the not so great ways include the BEYOND-limited rights of women here. I am talking about no cell phone talking in the street, okay, no TALKING in the street period for women...no laughing for women. No laughing! Yo have to wear full-body coverage at all times, but foreigners don't need to cover their hair.

No talking in the street, no laughing...what if you just went into the middle of the street and laid a really loud fart? Do you get caned for laughing, like in Singapore for graffiti?

Well, if you were Yemeni, your whole family would probably disown you because you disgraced them or some like bullshit. I have to go though, I'm meeting a friend for dinner and women aren't supposed to be out after sunset. But it will cost less than two dollars!

Seriously though, all the contrarians who say the demographic imbalance is overstated or overrated or overblown; it doesn't matter. Its perceived reality is all that matters — and hey, as it turns out, it isn't just perceived. Every time I enter into a romantic transaction in which I think I have accurately calculated my real Romantic Value, adjusted for geography-based purchasing power parity or whatever, I turn out to be wrong — we're like the dollar against the Euro; only with the one commodity that is harder for women here to give up than luxury goods and wine. (Collateral damage of Bush Administration profligacy? Not really but okay.) Last summer I got rejected by a guy who didn't know who Machiavelli was. (Well, to be fair, he said, "I know Tupac changed his name to that once.") But wait, let's talk fair: what was I doing with a dude who didn't know who Machiavelli was? Well, drinking, obviously, but...anyway, I realize...this is an unseemly amount of self-pity by way of introduction to what was meant to be opportunity for you, dear readers, to air an unseemly amount of self-pity. Enjoy!

The Singles Map [Creative Class Blog]

You've heard of "gilding the lily"? It's when you adorn something that is already beautiful or perfect, thereby sort of ruining it. Well, these roses are hand-dipped in gold, for some unfathomable reason. They "last a lifetime" but actually are only weirdly intriguing for 20 seconds. Or less.
($59.99 or one dozen for $598.99)

Footie pajamas have made a huge comeback. The Vermont Country Store had 'em in plaid, and Jumpin Jammerz offers penguins, lips, guitars, ducks, pink, camo and skulls. Also? It's not weird at all that that pigtailed woman is doing a split. Nope, not at all.
($59.99-$76.99)

This is the kiddie LoJack. Straight out of a James Bond film, the "watch" is actually a tracer. Grown-ups can find their kids in a crowd or backyard by using the tracker, which points to the general direction of the child. Of course, by that time, any kid worth his salt will have attached the thing to the dog.
($99.99)

Um, if your problems are this bad, shouldn't you see a professional? Psychiatrist, that is?
($43.95)

Oooh, lasers. For your head. Sure, sure. This dude totally has that "Shit it's not working" look in his eyes.
(LaserComb, $545 for 9 beams; $395 for 5 beams)

When you hide the litter box in a pot with a fake potted plant, people are bound to ask you why your faux-liage fucking reeks.
($129.99)

Which is sadder? That this product exists, or that some poor soul is thinking, "Hmm, Grandma needs that."
($39.98)

No lie: This is a fantastic idea. Two, please!
($54.95)

This pornographic device is a "core exerciser" that simulates horseback riding, which does not explain why the woman in the ad is watching swimming on TV. Also, the fact that this copy reads, "Sit there and enjoy the ride" seems to be enough evidence for sexual harassment in the workplace.
($519.99)

When you push a button on this "featherweight" wallet, it ejects the corresponding credit card. And the cool thing is, it's not bulky, weird, large, cumbersome, unwieldy or too big for the pocket of your jeans!
($39.99 for six card model; $59.99 for 12 card)

This is not haute couture. This is horrifying. It's a ($375) 6 ft. 3 in. woman with a light bulb for a head. The only thing worse would be some kind of yeti or Big Foot sculpture.








Nevermind.
($98.95)

[SkyMall]

Earlier: SkyMall: Shopping The Friendly Skies For Pointless Products
Sur La Table: Expensive, Accidentally Sexy Cookware
Victoria's Secret's "Last Minute Gifts": Whose Fantasy Is This, Anyway?
Neiman Marcus "Big 100 Gifts": 100% Overpriced, 100% Stupid
Lands' End: Practical Presents, Pleasantly Priced
Uncommon Goods: Quirky Stuff For The Person Who Already Has Everything
Brooks Brothers: This Christmas, WASPs Are Mad For Plaid
Bloomingdale's "Gifted": Overpriced Brand Names R Us
Doctors Foster & Smith: The Crazy Cat Lady Catalog
J. Crew's "Very Merry Gift Guide"
The Vermont Country Store: For Old Alcoholics & The Kids Who Enable Them
Bergdorf Goodman: My Kingdom For A Fountain Pen
Barneys New York: Shiny Happy People & Crazy Expensive Clothes
Anthropologie "Giving": We Love To Hate & Hate To Love It
'Tis The Season For Crappy Christmas Gifts

Hey, did you know the president of SkyMall is named Christine Aguilera? Imagine making restaurant reservations. The crushing disappointment of the maître d'.

"Leave no wine behind!" LOL. For the alcoholic on your list.
($399 for 12-bottle case)

"Have a clever alternative to glancing at your watch during long meetings," reads the copy for the hideous TimeMug. Your choice of original or rhinestone. The text also claims, "Never be late for an appointment." So if you buy one, and you are late, can you sue?
($29.95)

So your uncle wants to start selling off his WWII crap on eBay? Hook him up with a tabletop photo studio. ($79.95) And your aunt throws crazy Christmas parties? She obviously needs a snow-machine snowman. ($149.95)

What are the chances your nephew can put out someone's eye with a marshmallow shooter? Don't you kind of want to find out?
($24.95)

Someday we're going to be like, "When I was young there was this thing called a piggy bank." Meanwhile, kids today are learning the word "overdrawn."
($69.95)

There are quite a few hot-dog related items in SkyMall. This one makes heartburn for two. Romantic!
($49.95)

The time is 12:45 on this "unconventional timepiece," a fucked up clock designed to make your head explode. Great gift for the boss!
($59.95)

A robot shark (with submersible remote control) is actually pretty great, especially if you have a swimming pool. Freak out the neighbor's kids! Choose from hammerhead or bull shark — soundtrack to Jaws not included.
($99.95)

This is the droid you're looking for: Voice-activated R2D2 plays tag, follows you or turns into a security guard, sounding an alarm when someone enters a "secure area." May the force be with you if you don't see how awesome this is.
($119.95)

If you know someone really serious about partying, invest in this iPod amp on wheels. It also has jacks for a microphone and an instrument, in case a sing-along is in order.
($299)

Wasting away in Margaritaville just got easier: A programmable drink machine seems like the perfect thing to add to the company kitchen. Maybe all your coworkers can chip in for one?
($379)

It's kind of crazy to taunt people trapped on a long flight with thoughts of booze and snacks the airline doesn't actually serve. Also: What is up with the hot dog obsession? Stainless steel Margarator makes a gallon of margaritas. ($129.99)
Antique popcorn maker in black or red. ($299.99)
Retro kettle popcorn maker makes a gallon of popcorn in one batch. ($99.99)
Retro hot dog roller cooks 8 dogs at a time. ($59.99)

Do you hate when the butter's too hard to spread? (Heh, heh.) Ever thought to yourself, "Surely this is a problem that a mere 50 bucks can solve." Lo and behold: Butter wizard! This contraption "lets you fine tune the temperature to suit your taste." Thank the Lord.
($49.99)

Tomorrow: SkyMall part two — Footie pajamas, LoJack for kids and pornographic exercise equipment!

[SkyMall]

Earlier: Sur La Table: Expensive, Accidentally Sexy Cookware
Victoria's Secret's "Last Minute Gifts": Whose Fantasy Is This, Anyway?
Neiman Marcus "Big 100 Gifts": 100% Overpriced, 100% Stupid
Lands' End: Practical Presents, Pleasantly Priced
Uncommon Goods: Quirky Stuff For The Person Who Already Has Everything
Brooks Brothers: This Christmas, WASPs Are Mad For Plaid
Bloomingdale's "Gifted": Overpriced Brand Names R Us
Doctors Foster & Smith: The Crazy Cat Lady Catalog
J. Crew's "Very Merry Gift Guide"
The Vermont Country Store: For Old Alcoholics & The Kids Who Enable Them
Bergdorf Goodman: My Kingdom For A Fountain Pen
Barneys New York: Shiny Happy People & Crazy Expensive Clothes
Anthropologie "Giving": We Love To Hate & Hate To Love It
'Tis The Season For Crappy Christmas Gifts

Kidding! No Chinese dignitaries showed up because, improbably, the Fendi show is not the most important thing going on in Beijing this week. You see, the Chinese Communist Party's annual convention is underway! And in honor of the property's professed desire to promote more "healthy online cultural products" as "part of their efforts to promote social harmony" we decided to caption every picture from the show and accompanying parties with a powerful passages from the official Xinhua news agency coverage of the week's big speeches. Gallery - with Chinese characteristics! — begins below.

Customer service, tech support..these days we outsource everything to India. So why not pregnancy?

In all seriousness, we have given Marie Claire some shit but this story was incredibly awesome and dystopian and well-written in a way that we don't feel tempted to qualify with "for a gynomag" or "for us to poop on" or whatever. Buy it. (Just skip the $555 jeans!) Basically it's about rich women in America who are so self-absorbed and narcissistic that they will go to India to pay villagers (price: approx. nine pairs jeans) to surrogate mother their biological children because IT'S NOT LIKE THERE ARE ANY KIDS THAT NEED ADOPTING OVER THERE OR ANYTHING.