• Russell Brand on the Kanye West incident at the VMAs:

"You don't like to see people upset. But I think it just gets exciting, live television, live events. People get worked up and things happen." [AP]

• "However rude Kanye West's intrusion may have been, it suited the controversy the VMAs openly crave." [NY Times]
• Philippe van den Bossche, the boss of Madonna's Raising Malawi charity, has quit after falling in love with Madonna's trainer, Tracy Anderson — also famous for sculpting Gwyneth Paltrow's physique. [Page Six]
• Is Oprah in trouble? This report notes: "Winfrey is still the queen of daytime television, but the aura of invincibility is gone. The average viewership for The Oprah Winfrey Show slipped under 7 million last season, down 7 percent from the year before, according to Nielsen Media Research. One week during the July rerun season, the show had its lowest ratings since its 1985 debut." [AP]
• Colin Farrell: Having another baby. He and girlfriend Alicja Bachleda are expecting their first child. Colin has a 5-year-old son James from a previous relationship with model Kim Bordenave. [Us Magazine]
• At a red carpet event, a photographer asked Colin Farrell's sister to step away to Colin could be photographed alone. Colin got mad and confronted the snapper, who says: "I was just saying, 'Please can everyone clear the carpet, move on.' He took it personal. He said, 'Do not shout at my sister like that, do not ever speak to my sister like that ever.'' [Daily Express]
• Deepak Chopra knew Michael Jackson for 20 years, and he says of Michael's death: "It was caused not by the drugs he had been taking for years — He was a very controlled addict. But by him being given a particular drug that is so powerful that I have never heard of it being used anywhere but in an operating theater with breathing tubes and a ventilator… This is something bigger and is happening all the time – and not just in Hollywood. The number one cause of drug addiction in America right now is medical prescriptions. We have to wake up to that." [Telegraph]
• Elton John would like to adopt a Ukrainian boy named Lev, but the country bans gay couples from adopting children. In addition, Elton and partner David Furnish are considered too old to be adoptive parents. But click the links to see adorable pix of the tot. [The Sun, NY Daily News]
• Ugh, some of the comments on this Elton John story are vile. [Page Six]
• Gisele Bundchen hates when her personal real estate business is in the paper. [Page Six]
• Lionel Richie says now that daughter Nicole has given birth to son Sparrow, "She is the happiest woman ever. She is just in total control. I'm the one that's nervous!" He also jokes: "Harlow right now is enjoying the baby until she finds out it's staying." And: "[Sparrow] looks just like Harlow." [People]
• John Mayer was at a bar in NYC when someone got stabbed; Mayer and other patrons were "seen fleeing." [Page Six]
• Susan Boyle's first single has been revealed: It's a cover of The Rolling Stones' "Wild Horses." [Mirror]
• Tila Tequila has apparently been mentioning Chris Brown in her Tweets; Chris Brown has responded: "NOT TRYNA BE RUDE but i keep hearing tila bringing my name up. ur 15 seconds of fame has ended. dont try to gain fans by dissing me.godbless." [TMZ]
• Mischa Barton is working on her new show The Beautiful Life, but while doing so, she has been ordered to stay away from booze, boys and bad behavior. She complained to cast members: "All I can do is smoke cigarettes." [Page Six]
• Lost is scheduled to end on Wednesday, May 19, 2010. Mark your calendars. [ONTD via LostBlog]
• Ugh. Here's a "joke" an NFL announcer made during a Detroit Lions game: "Going from two Super Bowls in Pittsburgh to the winless Detroit team — that's like going from dating Beyoncé to Whoopi Goldberg." [TMZ]
• "Russell Brand romanced model Christy Peterson for three months without seeing another girl. Then he told her to go shopping with his mum and had sex with a fan and a stripper." [News.com.au]
• "Prince Harry leaves nightclub ten minutes after Chelsy Davy... as he misses Lord Freddie Windsor's wedding." [Daily Mail]
• Interested in a Hollywood Hills 5,334 square foot 1929 Spanish-style house or a 4,062 square foot three-story contemporary Mediterranean home with a guesthouse? Ben Stiller and Christine Taylor are selling, and you only need around $12.5 million [UPI]
• Jay Leno's new show is related to NBC's decision to split football drama Friday Night Lights between DirecTV and NBC. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Dancing With The Stars' Maksim Chmerkovskiy is "still nursing a broken heart but doing okay" after his breakup with Karina Smirnoff. [People]
• Chandra Wilson has been nominated four consecutive years for her portrayal of Miranda Bailey, the no-nonsense chief resident on ABC's Grey's Anatomy, but is still looking for her first win. She says: "The thing that always impresses me whenever I go on the website each year to cast my little vote for myself, there are like 400 women there! So to even get in the top five, narrowed down from all those women, that's already amazing. I'm a huge fan of Sandra's work on this show. So the fact that we keep coming in together, I'm highly complimented by that. I also think it's a big testament to the show remaining as current as it is, six years in." [NY Times]
• Harrison Ford was honored with a tribute to his career at the 35th Deauville American Film Festival in Normandy, France, and got all choked up. Han Solo doesn't cry! [Daily Mail]
• Director Niki Caro and actress Keisha Castle-Hughes paired up in 2002's divine Whale Rider, and have reteamed for new film The Vinter's Luck. [USA Today]
• Couple alert: Chace Crawford and Bar Refaeli. [NY Daily News]
• Formula 1 driver Lewis Hamilton has dumped girlfriend Nicole Scherzinger of the Pussycat Dolls, telling her he is not ready for marriage and children. But she was quoted as saying: "My dream is to do my own music one day, to have an unbelievable tour, to have done some musical theatre and some film and maybe to have opened up a performing arts school for special needs kids. That is my ultimate dream — not marriage." [Mirror]
• Even though they broke up 22 years ago, The Smiths are gaining new fans, thanks to 500 Days Of Summer. [Independent]
• ABBA's Benny Anderson on rumors that the group will create music for a sequel to Mamma Mia!: "it's not going to happen. There will not be another, quote unquote, Abba musical." [UPI]
• "Sir Michael Caine described his latest vigilante film as a 'warning' of the way British society is heading." [Mirror]
• Kirk Douglas, 92, Is the oldest person on MySpace. He recently sent son Michael Douglas a message which read: "I've got 800 new friends, what should I do?" [Mirror]
• I Can Do Bad All By Myself opened at the top of the weekend box office with more than $24 million in ticket sales. [NY Daily News]
• Blind items! "Which has-been action hero has knocked up his comely assistant? When his longtime girlfriend learned of the impending birth, she angrily split… Which world-famous actor has fallen out with his equally A-list director? They have weeks to go on their upcoming block buster, but the actor thinks the director is arrogant and dismissive of his ideas, while the director considers his leading man to be a spoiled, over rated punk." [Page Six]
• "I'm not that motivated nor do I see that many good projects that make me want to take me away from my family. So much so, that his young children see mummy as the film star in the family. All they know was daddy makes pancakes because I did not have a movie to show them." — Michael Douglas. [Mirror]
• "It feels like we have been away for a long time. The four of us were feeling really nervous about coming back home." — Chris Martin, on Coldplay playing its first UK gig this year. [BBC News]
• "I am comfortable singing in a context like that. I am least comfortable singing karaoke, and less comfortable singing in cabarets. I really only like singing when you understand the context, so an awards show is fine." — Neil Patrick Harris on the Emmys, which he'll be hosting Sunday. [USA Today]
• "You're surrounded by cameras, you're surrounded by film crews, you're surrounded by equipment. It's, like, the most empty, unromantic experience ever." — Penn Badgley on kissing scenes on Gossip Girl. [USA Today]
• "I'm not a great actor. I don't fool myself to think that I am. Most of the work that I get is through having really good relationships with people and being dependable… We all have to put each other in check. Otherwise, people start to become delusional about who they are and what they are and what they're contributing to the world." — Ashton Kutcher. [New York Magazine]
• "Popular music has an emotional-intelligence quotient that's geared much toward younger people. It's all about [he flattens his voice to a disaffected teen monotone] 'You left me. Why did you leave me? I still love you. I tried so hard to stop loving you.' And it's like, well, I relate to that, I just don't want to think about that. When you're younger, you want to wallow in it. When you get older, you still love the person, and wonder why they don't love you. You just have other things to do." — Alec Baldwin. [New York Magazine]
• "At one of the orgies there was this bunny - there was a rabbit, who was just sitting there staring at us. We all kept saying, 'Look that bunny's still there.' And after about 45 minutes, I thought, 'Maybe he's hurt,' and I started to walk over to it and it took two hops and I was like, 'Nope, he's just a pervert.' … He was pervy Peter Rabbit!" — Michelle Forbes, aka Maryann from True Blood. [People]
• "I'm happy to be a representative for curvier women, but I don't really want to be known as 'the fat one.' I don't really mind what people want to say about me, but it's just that I have two daughters and I don't want them growing up to believe that flesh is something to be ashamed of, particularly at their age. They need to understand not to take any notice. I'm happy with my shape." — Nigella Lawson. [Telegraph]
• "It's just a working relationship. We all have our different things that we're doing. We're not friends, but we are cordial." — Sheree Whitfield, on fellow Real Housewives Of Atlanta castmates NeNe, Kim, Lisa and Kandi, whom Sheree says she doesn't really hang out with. [E!]
• "It doesn't really matter, those are Michael's kids. He raised those kids. They were in his arms when they were born." — La Toya Jackson, when asked about the biological father of Michael Jackson's children. [NY Daily News]
• "I recognized myself in that character and most of all, I recognized that I have seen the Precious girls of the world and they have been invisible to me. None of us who see the movie can walk through the world and allow the Preciouses to be invisible again." —Oprah, on the lead character in Precious, the film for which she is the co-executive producer. [AFP]
• "[Director] Karyn Kusama and I are both outspoken feminists. We wanted to subvert the classic horror model of women being terrorized. I want to write roles that service women. I want to tell stories from a female perspective. I want to create good parts for actresses where they're not just accessories to men… The friendships that I had as an adolescent had this unparalleled intensity. I wanted to show how almost horrific that devotion can be. It's almost parasitic." — Diablo Cody on Jennifer's Body. [Reuters]

• Victoria Beckham had her first day on the set of American Idol on Friday and a source says: "It didn't go well." Why ever not?

"She tried to hard to be 'nice,' but came off as icy and wooden," a source revealed. Plus: Contestants were disappointed not to see Paula on the panel. [Radar Online]

• Before she started judging, Victoria Beckham told Ryan Seacrest: "I'm going to try hard to pout and not shatter the illusion that I'm a moody cow, but I don't know if I can - I'm just so happy." [Daily Mail]
• Meanwhile, ABC has reached out to Paula Abdul about joining Dancing With The Stars. as a judge or a contestant. [Variety]
• Olivia Newton-John's former boyfriend, Patrick McDermott, presumed dead since 2005, is alive in Mexico and wishes to be left alone. He reportedly owes back child support to his ex-wife, which may be one of the reasons he disappeared. [Daily Mail]
• Behold: A picture of Real Housewives Kim Zolciak with her "Big Poppa." [TMZ]
• Jon Gosselin will sit down for an interview with E!, and react to whatever Kate Gosselin says on the Today show today. So there's a Jon special on E! tonight — and tomorrow night, a full interview. [E!]
• Kate Major continues to attempt to be relevant. [E!]
• Jeremy Piven and Chris Kattan got into a screaming match backstage at MTV on Thursday: Kattan said "So, what are you here to promote, your Broadway play?" and Piven said Well, what are you here to promote? Mango?" Tempers flared. Doors slammed. Obscenities were yelled. Funny dudes can't take jokes? [Gatecrasher]
• Sparkle vamp Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart were spotted at a Bobby Long concert in L.A. on Thursday night. Because their love is destiny, people! And what is a sparkle vamp without a ladylove? According to this report: "After the show, a cab spirited them off into the night." [ET]
• "Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart heat up with low-key date nights and hotel sleepovers." [NY Daily News]
• Pattinson had a low-key night out… not in a Manhattan hot spot. On Long Island. [Page Six]
• A man accused of sending death threats to Beyoncé and Jay-Z will have to undergo a mental evaluation, duh. [Daily Express]
• "America's other first couple: Beyoncé and Jay-Z are black America's second most famous couple: young, rich and with a direct line to the White House." [Times Of London]
• Is Guy Ritchie dating Iron Man actress Mellany Gandara? [Daily Express]
• Katherine Jackson's lawyer L. Londell McMillan says: "She's got her grandchildren, they're set. She's starting to rock and roll. She's getting her grandma swagger back. But she has been busy trying to make sure that these children will be provided for." [People]
• Mark Lester, who was in the 1968 film Oliver!, and is the godfather of Michael Jackson's kids, says he could be the biological father of Paris Jackson. This paper puts a picture of Paris side by side with a picture of Lester's daughter and survey says: Probably not. But does Paris have long ears like Arnold Klein? [Daily Mail]
• "Longtime Michael Jackson friend Mark Lester is not the father of Jackson's daughter, nor is he claiming paternity, despite a tabloid report indicating Lester says he's Paris Jackson's biological dad, sources tell People." [People]
• A source says that Michael Jackson was super excited about his upcoming tour. "He even said to me on several occasions, 'I am going to give everything I have. He even said, I'll die on the stage if I have to. It gives me the chills thinking about it now." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Michael Jackson's body was finally buried at Forest Lawn Cemetery in the Hollywood Hills. No ceremony, no fans. The exact location is a secret. [Mirror]
• Presented without comment: "A doctor has revealed how he prescribed Michael Jackson a 'chemical castration' drug to suppress his sexual urges towards under-age boys." [Mirror]
• ABC entertainment president Stephen McPherson on Katherine Heigl's latest anti-Grey's Anatomy tirade: "People will behave in a way they choose to behave. There are so many people who work unbelievably hard on Grey's… so I think it's really hard for them to hear [her complain about working a 17-hour day]." [EW]
• Jenna Fischer says: "I always see these tabloid reports about certain people being 'Spotted Without Their Wedding Ring!' like it's some big deal… [I don't wear my ring because I] would have to take it off and leave it in my trailer, which I would never do. They aren't that secure. Break-ins happen all the time. So if I go someplace after work I could be 'spotted' without my ring. It means nothing." [People]
• How did Ashlee Simpson lose her "baby weight"? Luck. "After I had Bronx I lucked out. I mean, I'm 24 years old. I have the genes from my mother and I did work out for three months." [The Sun]
• "A Night Out With Holly Madison" reveals that she calls a vodka and water "The Skinny Bitch," and later announces: "Chicken fingers are seriously, like, my favorite food." [NY Times]
• Kelsey Grammer says the cancellation of his TV series Back To You may have contributed to his heart attack in 2008. "When they examined my arteries, there was no blocked arteries. I had no cholesterol buildup. I had an event that they think was stress-related." [UPI]
• Madonna's boyfriend, model Jesus Luz, would like to be a DJ. [Page Six]
• Just a reminder: Vanessa Hudgens plays Sa5m in Bandslam, but the 5 is silent. Her character "is an emo girl who speaks slowly because of a stutter, resembles Ally Sheedy in The Breakfast Club and is ostensibly the female lead, Ms. Hudgens argues to the contrary." [NY Times]
• Shannon Elizabeth and Derek Hough: Broken up. They will "remain friends." [UPI]
• Tracy Morgan and his wife Sabina have been married for 23 years, but reportedly spent the last eight living apart. Morgan has decided to file for divorce, maybe because he took some cornbread behind a middle school and got it pregnant. [TMZ]
• Lady GaGa says she wore that Kermit coat as a statement: "I thought it was [a] commentary on not wearing fur, 'cause I hate fur and I don't wear fur." Naturally, now PETA would like for her to pose nude in an ad campaign. [TMZ]
• Cheech Marin married longtime girlfriend Natasha Rubin over the weekned. [People]
• If you do nothing else today, for the love of Kirk, read this William Shatner interview. It's crazyinsane. A snippet: So what is your relationship with Conan really like when the cameras are off? "It's great, he folds me into his arms and I come up to his belly button. So I suckle on his belly button and he holds me close." [Time]
• Just what your Monday morning needs: An anecdote about Mick Jagger's penis. [Page Six]
• Whatshisname says Whatshername is disgusting because she let her four-year-old son see her in bed with her new lover. [The Sun]
• "Because I'm pretty everybody thinks I'm stupid. But you don't have to play a victim. You have to show who you are to make the others come to discover you." — Monica Bellucci. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "I don't sit there and think 'well I did Confessions of a Shopaholic and now I've got to go out and do Chekhov.' If the next one that comes along happens to be another romantic comedy and I find something in it that appeals to me then great. I operate on almost no system at all." — Hugh Dancy. [Independent]
• "I had a conversation with one of the scientists, and I was saying how I interviewed some [little] kids. I asked him what his opinion was, because I was like, 'Oh, it's really sweet, their idea of love is so pure.' And he was like, 'They don't really understand what love is because they haven't got their hormones and they haven't had sex and they haven't had that many relationships.' And I'm like, it doesn't mean that you can't experience love. Just the fact that you've been in one relationship doesn't devalue how you feel about someone. One of the couples in the film met when they were fourteen and their parents were like, 'That's puppy love.' They ended up being together for over fifty years. So I think people are biased against age." — Charlyne Yi. [Nerve]
• "She knew that I wanted to paint and make music. Eventually she said: ‘do it!' She encouraged me to go forward without fear . So it's all thanks to my wife, who knew that I had done a lot of acting over the years and suggested maybe it was time to start doing something else." — Anthony Hopkins, who has an exhibition of his paintings in Tuscany and also composes orchestral work. [Daily Express]
• Q. Does it feel odd to be putting young designers out in the world when the fashion world is in extreme crisis? A. "I think that everything is kind of in crisis. But what are you going to do? Is everyone going to stop working? I think the best will always succeed in any world. The people who are working hard, I think they will stay out there. In terms of fashion, maybe there are things that are more needed than other things — and the things that people cannot afford, maybe those things will go. But I don't think people should stop their dreams. A lot of our designers, people who have been on in the past, not everyone is self-employed. I think the only one who has become successful is Christian [Siriano] — on their own. I think the others are also successful, not as their own brand. Which I think is also success! They are working under good design houses. Or selling on HSN or Shopping Network." — Heidi Klum, on Project Runway. [LA Times]
• "I grew up on a red dirt road with a tree growing right in the middle of it. We didn't have much, but it never occurred to me that if you wanted to do something you couldn't do it. You can do anything if you try… I came here with a curling iron, two boxes of clothes and $200 in savings." — Nancy Grace. [USA Today]
• "I walk around and don't understand why more people are not smiling, enjoying the day, why they give me stink-eye. I guess being happy must not agree with them. I do not say I am always happy, but I do strive to be cheery." — Amy Adams. [Times Of London]
• "About 50 percent [of Paper Heart is fiction]. Everything with the interview subjects is real, but the plot with Michael Cera is fiction… But I honestly was kind of questioning the idea of love. I'd dropped out of college and I'd just been doing comedy, and I'm kind of like an old lady — when I was 10 I learned how to knit — so, most of my friends would go to clubs [to meet people], but I don't go to clubs or bars because I don't drink. So there was this fear of, how would I meet someone my own age? It's not that I doubted other people's love. It was just about my own concern of whether it could happen to me." — Charlyne Yi [WaPo]
• "You know when you first discovered a hamburger and then you can't live without it? That's what it's like for me with her" — Ashton Kutcher on his love for Demi Moore to Gotham magazine. [Page Six]
• "I'd rather staple my eyelids shut than watch Gwyneth cook." — Bethenny Frankel. [Gatecrasher]

• Chris Brown is being sued for assault and battery, but not by anyone you know:

The suit is being filed by Robert Rosen, who took a photo of Brown playing basketball at a gym in L.A. Rosen ran away when Brown's bodyguards noticed him; but fell down the stairs in his rush. Then, according to this report, one of the bodyguards "picked him up by his shorts and physically assaulted him, causing further injuries." [Radar Online]

• Chris Brown's lawyer, Mark Geragos, says: "This is a specious and frivolous lawsuit by one of the paparazzi seeking publicity and a payday. [Rosen] has done this before and lost. We will vigorously defend against this." [Radar Online, TMZ]
• Depeche Mode singer Dave Gahan has undergone surgery to remove a cancerous tumor from his bladder. Be well. [BBC News]
• RED ALERT! PRINCE HARRY ARRIVES IN NYC TOMORROW! GINGER CANDY FOR EVERYONE!!! [NY Daily News]
• Courtney Love "failed and refused to make payments" on her American Express cards, and the company's taking her to court, claiming she owes $352,059.67 in unpaid charges and fees. Ugh, they always get you on the fees! [E!]
• Hey, did you notice how Michael Lohan, who looooooves publicity, hid the fact that he was arrested in April for allegedly threatening to kill himself and his fiancée??? [MSNBC]
• Will you root for Michael Lohan in his "celebrity" boxing match against Johnny Fairplay? [TMZ]
• Director McG says the of the Christian Bale rant: "I'm to blame for the whole thing." Really? Do tell! "First and foremost it's my job to create a safe environment on the set at all times so that actors can explore any given emotion and always believe in the sanctity of the film… The fact it was leaked was inexcusable and I'm ashamed and embarrassed on behalf of Hollywood that that would happen. It's very unfortunate." He goes on to explain that he deliberately aggravated Bale so that his character would be more on edge: "I'm on the set getting in Christian's face… Now that's going to get him fired up in the spirit of creating a real life and death performance and that's never meant to get outside that arena… The truth is simply Christian's a good guy. Don't accuse him of being a bad guy because he's not. He loves his family, he has no entourage, he's an actor's actor and he operates from a place of passion. He'll be the first to admit, 'Wow, I flew off the handle,' but he was very much involved in what I was driving him to." [Telegraph]
• Lionel and Nicole Richie talked to CNN's Larry King in a joint interview which will air tonight. Larry asked Nicole if she's going to get married, and she said, "Eventually, yes… I think for both of us, we are going to do it because we want to, not because that's what you do." And! As a grandfather, Lionel is "very animated. He smiles like this all the time, and so he's nothing but fun for Harlow. She absolutely loves him." Larry asked Lionel if he wanted Nicole and Joel to get married, and Lionel said: "I want them to take their time. I'm more interested in whether they like each other and whether they're best friends. Because that means they'll be great parents forever." Wise man! [CNN]
• "'Jon & Kate Plus 8' madness: Why do viewers care about the Gosselins, anyway?" [NY Daily News]
• Kylie Minogue wedding rumors: Persistent. This paper says she's in Rome, among "engagement whispers." [Daily Mail]
• MSNBC Scoop's Courtney Hazlett says it should come as no surprise that voting blocs were part of the American Idol process; writing: "The bottom line is this: it was a group of organized [Kris] Allen fans who went to the trouble of getting AT&T to their viewing parties and Fox has a system in place to discard power votes." [MSNBC Scoop]
• After being with Def Jam for years — and being the CEO of that label — Jay-Z is close to signing a deal with Sony. [Reuters]
• Wait, this report says Jay-Z is in talks with Warner Music Group. [Gatecrasher]
• Eminem's album had the best first-week sales of 2009. Then again, it's been a crappy year for music. [Daily News]
• A journalist did something to upset or tease Susan Boyle, and she lost her temper in a hotel lobby. Details are sketchy. [Mirror]
• T.R. Knight will not be returning to Grey's Anatomy next season, according to sources; apparently he has been frustrated by his character's lack of storyline. [E!]
• Kelly Ripa's lawyers have sent cease and desist letters to some internet weight loss product which uses Ripa's face in its ads. [TMZ]
• Emily Blunt will be honored as British Artist of the Year at the 2009 BAFTA/LA Brittania Awards on Nov. 5. Her upcoming films include The Young Victoria and The Wolfman, with my übercrush Benicio Del Toro. Congrats! [The Hollywood Reporter]
• The Sydney Theater Company, run by Cate Blanchett and husband Andrew Upton, is experiencing a cash crisis. [Jill Zarin tried to get on Inside The Actors Studio, and James Lipton had to tell her it was for ACTORS. [Gatecrasher]
• If you would like to see a video of Kristin Cavallari "making an entrance" at Spencer and Heidi's wedding, by all means, click the link. Warning: it looks staged as all hell. [Perez]
• Gossip Girl's Chace Crawford may be hooking up with Sports Illustrated swimsuit model Esti Ginzburg. [Page Six]
• Chace Crawford on being in Footloose, the movie based on the musical based on the movie, which Zac Efron was supposed to star in: "I know Zac and we're actually friends. He's gotta make the best choice for his career at this point and I have to make the best for mine and luckily it worked out for both of us." Chace also says: "I don't know if the gymnastics [high bar] scene is going to make it. I've got some movement in me, but I'm not a dancer… I need to start stretching now." [EW]
• Tom Cruise has a job! He'll star in action comedy Wichita, with Cameron Diaz as a costar. The gist: Cruise will play a secret agent who pops in and out of the life of a single woman. Do you think they will make out? [Variety]
• "Barbra Streisand has finished building her dream house and started to think about her life." [AP]
• Do you care about Katie "Jordan" Price? Do you care about her ex-boyfriend, former boy band singer Dane Bowers? He was arrested on suspicion of drink driving after a car crash.[Independent]
• The Little Britain guys are going after Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow; David Walliams told an interviewer that in order to sort out the "important issues" of the world he had to dress like a star from Les Miserables musical and call his first born child after a piece of fruit. [The Sun]
• Something about this picture of Kelis pregnant and in a bikini makes me smile. [Concrete Loop]
• Peter Falk's wife and daughter continue to battle over conservatorship of the 81-year-old actor, who suffers from dementia. [LA Times]
• Phil Spector's lawyers are trying to get his sentence reduced. [AP]
• Blind item! "Which Great White Way star tries to rock girls he's crushing on by sending them X-rated photos of himself?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I hope this doesn't sound narcissistic because I have a supporting part in the movie, but I can't wait to see it again. I've never been a part of a movie I've so thoroughly enjoyed." — Justin Long, on the Sam Raimi thriller Drag Me To Hell. [CBS News]
• "Most of the stuff I don't tell her about, and she doesn't want to know about. She wants me to come home safe. A lot of it, she's just shook her head at. We've made a few trips to the hospital. That's how you know I am hurt, when I come home and voluntarily go by the emergency room. I've busted a few ribs and bruised my back and cracked the bone in my elbow. I think I got a concussion. It's my job." — Jesse James, who withholds information about his show Jesse James Is A Dead Man from wife Sandra Bullock. [USA Today]
• "I was really interested in seeing what the routine is, and it's really shocking, no matter what you've done, you stole, you killed or whatever, if you're in prison, everybody gets treated the same - I kinda thought that was really shocking. When they strip away your basic human rights, there's a routine of going anywhere - one door closes, another one opens. If they have a suspicion that you have anything on you, they strip-search you. You can't do what you want to do anymore. And that to me was a lot more shocking. "They don't make a difference - like he raped 58 women and killed 10 or if you didn't pay your parking tickets and you're in prison for six months, it doesn't matter, it's the same." — Diane Kruger, who researched prison life for her new French thriller Anything For Her. [Mirror]

• Madonna is in Malawi, asking the court for approval to adopt a second child. [Times of London]
• Madonna's adoption ruling has been delayed until Friday; the court has not revealed why.

The child in question is four years old and named Mercy; her unmarried mother died soon after she was born. Madonna brought both Lourdes and David to Malawi with her and David visited with his biological father. "I was very happy to see him," the father told The Associated Press, adding that David did not recognize him. "He asked me who I was." [Yahoo via AP, Guardian]

• Madonna has purchased land in Malawi so she can build a school for girls. Some residents are afraid they will lose their homes and fields. [People]
• Save The Children is not happy about Madonna trying to adopt and a spokesperson says: "What Madonna is doing verges on a puppy parade. People like her are looking for the most beautiful child. They wouldn't choose a child with a disability or special needs. It doesn't help to take one child out of an orphanage to a huge palace and buy them a pony." [Mirror]
• Is a Russian model/pop star named Irson Kudikova about to get engaged to Mickey Rourke? [Page Six]
• Britney Spears had passed President Obama in Twitter Followers, taking the #2 spot (CNN Breaking News is number 1). She tweeted: "#2 People!!! You guys continue to make me SOOO happy! I truly have the best fans on the planet! CAN'T WAIT for TEXAS tomorrow… - Bri." Then Ashton Kutcher stole the #2 spot. [PopDirt]
• This report claims that Britney's Gulfstream jet is a mess: "The plane is stocked with Twinkies, beef jerky and M&Ms," says a source. "When she's done, she just throws the wrappers on the floor." Plus, there are two puppies adding to the chaos, who "scoot" around like crazy. [Star]
• Breaking: Victoria Beckham seen in flip-flops! [JustJared]
• Michael Jackson's son, Prince Michael I, might join MJ on stage at the first of his London shows. That would certainly be… interesting. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Apparently Zac Efron's ears are dirty, because he was recently pelted with Q-Tips by a paparazzo. There's video, but chances are it will just make you sad. [ONTD]
• More Zac Efron ear wax news. What a world we live in. [TMZ]
• Rihanna went dancing and a spywitness says "It was like the queen of England was out clubbing. You couldn't even get anywhere near her, between the bodyguards and the people wanting to touch her. And it was so morbid, too — it's all because she was beaten." [E!]
• By the by, there is nothing going on between Rihanna and Frankie Delgado. But you knew that. [TMZ]
• Miley Cyrus cried upon winning Favorite Female Singer at the Kids' Choice Awards. "I really thought I was going to lose, so thank you, guys." [E!]
• Some are saying the crying was staged because Miley already knew she would be winning the award. She Tweets: "For all the haters saying I knew about my KCA before hand have nooo idea what they are talking about! I was so suprised! :) thank u again xo" [PopDirt]
• Neither Chris Brown nor Rihanna attended the Kids' Choice Awards. Rapper Soulja Boy was sad! "I was looking forward to seeing them here," he said. [Yahoo News via AP]
• A woman harassed Ricky Martin at a club in South Beach, where he and "several male friends" were trying to have a good time. [Gatecrasher]
• John Mayer works the short-shorts on his cruise, the "Mayercraft Carrier." [The Superficial]
• Mariah Carey was seen drinking glasses of red wine with a straw. Classy! [Gatecrasher]
• Lipstick Jungle is canceled. For real this time. [EW]
• Paris Hilton attended Perez Hilton's birthday Party in a convergence of things that seem so three years ago. [PopDirt]
• Fox is developing a dating show with "average-looking" people. By that, they mean overweight. It's called More To Love and the bachelor is a "Kevin James type." [Yahoo via Reuters]
• Fox News' Bill O'Reilly boycotts Sean Penn films. Think Sean Penn cares? [Yahoo via Reuters]
• Joely Richardson has returned to work, ten days after her sister Natasha died. [The Sun]
• Ugly Betty star Ana Ortiz is pregnant and expecting a baby girl at the end of July. She says: "I've had a great experience so far. Talk to me in another month." [People]
• Amy Winehouse is a thumbsucker. [People]
• Yes, the ShamWow guy punched a prostitute. Police say "Both parties had a strong odor of an alcoholic beverage emitting from their persons." [The Smoking Gun, Hollywood Rag]
• Monsters vs. Aliens scared up $58.2 million at the box office; big numbers. [USA Today]
• But one of the reasons Monsters vs. Aliens made so much? 3-D tickets cost more. [NY Times]
• Rhys Ifans has been cast in the next Harry Potter flick; he'll play Xenophilius Lovegood. [Daily Express]
• RIP composer Maurice Jarre, who wrote the music for Doctor Zhivago and Lawrence Of Arabia. [Independent]
• Blind item! "Which top actor got caught with his pants down in a club's closet with two very unattractive women, which his friends all proceeded to laugh at?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I was assuming that [my character's days were numbered] at one point and I got a lot of shrugged shoulders and shakes of the head, so I don't know if that's a yes or a no. No one will tell me and I don't know how this is going to go. I don't know if I live or die. I don't know how Izzie fares." — Katherine Heigl. [E!]
• "In the film we made penises, and I'm walking around them — we have made them more or less the same dimensions, but there are bug penises, giraffe penises, goat penises. They are like a forest of penises. … I was already playing a starfish, or a bug. I thought that stretch was much bigger, to be a sea creature than to play a male! But the real reason is sometimes [males] move more. For example, the female spider sits on the web, and she is three to five times bigger than the male, so he has to approach her. I was reluctant to do mammals, because they look so similar to us. But what's interesting about the whale is the female puts her vagina on the surface of the water, out of the reach of the male. Then she can see the males fight and she can select which one she likes, and then she turns over and lets him get to her. I thought, I can do that!" — Isabella Rossellini, on playing the parts of animals, in her web series Green Porno. [NY Post]
• "I'm looking forward to knowing what's going on - I still have no clue. The only thing I ever got right was the island moving, which was pretty good. But that's it. I don't know what the story is or where we will end up." — Josh Holloway, aka Sawyer, of Lost. He also says when the show ends he will get a haircut: "One of our camera operators had a beautiful Mohawk. I've always wanted one." [The Sun]
• "Rule one – you don't play on the snooker table unless you've been asked. And, secondly, you never, ever, take the shepherd's pie unless Keith Richards' broken the crust first." — Mick Jagger, on touring with the Rolling Stones. [The Sun]
• "My first bra was not very exciting. I was a late bloomer-the last of my girlfriends to get one. It was this horrible training bra-type thing, but it prompted me to save my money and buy my own darn bra. My mom was like, ‘You can't have the black lace one.' And I was like, ‘Why not?' I've never equated beautiful lingerie with seduction or sex. It's not about trying to get a man. Not at all. It's about surrounding myself with beauty in my everyday life-whether it's a bra or a notebook. I want everything around me to be attractive because I look at it every day." — Dita Von Teese. [JustJared]
• "The biggest misconception about me is that I am not a real person. The assumption is that my eccentricity is not who I really am, but it is. I have lost my mind." — Lady GaGa. [NY Mag]

• Grey's Anatomy star T.R. Knight was in a three-car crash yesterday. He was not injured, but two other people were taken to the hospital by ambulance. [LA Times]

• The President Of The United States, Barack Obama, was on The Tonight Show With Jay Leno last night. He brought lulz (More later). [NY Daily News]
• Barack Obama made a joke about the Special Olympics and for that he is sorry. [NY Daily News]
• Here's a picture of Chris Brown getting off of a private jet and riding a bike around on the tarmac like he's having the time of his life. Raise your hand if it makes you feel stabby. [TMZ]
• Jennifer Aniston is narrating a children's book. Cue the ZOMG SHE WANTS BABIEZ headlines. [Gatecrasher]
• Are Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel on a fast train to Splitsville? [Perez, Chicago Sun-Times]
• When Beyoncé stopped at Patricia Field the other day, she spent $11,000 in 20 minutes. How come didn't get us anything? [Page Six]
• It's a big weekend at the box office, with lots of stars: Nicolas Cage, Paul Rudd, Jason Segel, Clive Owen and Julia Roberts. Plus, Amy Adams's Sunshine Cleaning will move into additional theaters. What to see? [Reuters]
• "Five Reasons Julia Roberts Is Too Old (or Not)." Wait, what? [E!]
• This article asks "Is John Hamburg (the writer/director of I Love You Man) The New Judd Apatow?" [LA Times]
• Actual headline: "Miley Cyrus Shakes Her Ass For Paps." And it's not on Perez! [E!]
• For some reason there is a feud between Chris Jericho and Mickey Rourke. Jericho says when Rourke comes to Wrestlemania, he will "get out of the ring, walk over to Mickey, and slap him in the face." Lame. [Gatecrasher]
• Someone is pregnant on The Office. [E!]
• Speaking of The Office, did you dig Idris Elba? He has a Twitter. [EW]
• A Sheryl Crow/Stevie Nicks tour? Maybe! [Gatecrasher]
• There's a new Facebook group called UCLA Students Against James Franco as Commencement Speaker. It's jut mean! [E!]
• Dane Cook's half-brother and former business manager was indicted Thursday on eight counts of larceny; he'd been funneling millions from Cook's business accounts. No joke there. [E!]
• Real Housewives Of Orange County star Gretchen Rossi was spotted making out with Slade Smiley. [TMZ]
• Nick Lachey pitched a reality show to MTV and they liked it! Taking The Stage is about kids at a performing arts school (his alma mater in Cincinnati). Kinda like Fame, if you're old enough to remember hot lunch. [LA Times]
• Debra Messing is named in a lawsuit involving a traffic accident in which her car struck a police officer, even though Messing wasn't driving the car. [TMZ]
• The cast of the new Star Trek flick is heading to Australia; the movie will make its world premiere at the Sydney Opera House on April 7. No word if that guy with the Kirk chair will get to go. [Yahoo News via Reuters]
• Not only is Vanessa Williams awesome on Ugly Betty, she is working on a new album. "I had been wanting to do a Latin-flavored album since I played a ballroom dancer in the (salsa) movie Dance With Me," Williams says. [USA Today]
• Ooh, Elle Macpherson on TV! The CW show is called Beautiful Life, and she'll okay the owner of a modeling agency, naturally. [Reuters]
• Hmm, Mary J. Blige is joining the cast if the next Tyler Perry movie. Love her; not sure about him. [Reuters]
• Gossip Girl fans: Check out this new clip that's popped up: Chuck vs. Dorota! [People]
• Whitney Port and actor Robert Buckley were seen making out all over Miami. Hopefully someday soon we can stop thinking about these semi-famous [E!]
• There is a new romcom in the works called Merman. Yes, it is about a man who is half fish. He "comes to land so he can win back his mermaid fiance, who has left him for a real man." I'm not lying when I say it's produced by the dude who brought you Splash. [EW, Variety]
• Tara Reid has a job! She's been cast in an untitled horror film, in which she will play a mother whose family is terrorized by an unsees presence. [Variety]
• Former Soul Train host Don Cornelius has been sentenced to three years probation after pleading no contest to misdemeanor spousal battery. [Reuters]
• Blind item! "Which engaged young couple shocked an entire film crew when they were caught having sex on set?" [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item: "Which hip-hop fashion team is taking more credit than it deserves? While most designers acknowledge their assistants do much of the work, this up-and-coming pair accept kudos but never mention the staff in the back who actually make it happen." [Page Six]
• "I remember a performance of The Fantasticks where a mom brought a teenage son with Tourette's syndrome to the show. It was explained to me that because he liked me a lot, it became especially difficult for him to control his outbursts when I came on stage. Every time I said or sang anything, he would snort, howl or bellow some expletive about bodily functions or female anatomy, [and drop] F-bombs." — Kristin Chenoweth, in her memoir, A Little Bit Wicked. [Page Six]
• "I like all the Wii games. Love Guitar Hero. Growing up, I liked Tetris. I even like BrickBreaker on the BlackBerry. [My first console was] a Nintendo. I would play Super Mario Bros. We weren't supposed to play it after nine o'clock, and I would sneak and play all night. I loved it." — Beyoncé. [Mirror]
• "I had my tonsils taken out [at age 13], and they gave me liquid Vicodin. I found, when I take this, people like me. I'm having fun, I'm not getting picked on. It became a confidence thing." — Kelly Osbourne, who says she is finally completely clean after a month in rehab. [People]
• "I am shirtless and I have back hair in Observe And Report, and it's glorious. They did have me shave my back for Knocked Up. Judd Apatow said, 'People are not ready for a hairy back in a sex scene. We're just not there yet as a society.'" — Seth Rogen. [Page Six]

• "Life poet" Joaquin Phoenix on his rap career:

"I want it to be big. Not big like popular. I want it to really try and be, for me, the culmination of my life thus far. I realize it's going to be for public consumption, so there are songs that are about - there are dance songs. Most of it, I think, is an internal exploration." Like a rectal exam? [USA Today]

• James Gray, the director of Joaquin's latest film, Two Lovers, says of JP's hip-hop thing: "If it's an act, it's the most committed act I've ever seen in my life. I mean, he built a studio [in his house]." ABC News]
• If you want to talk to Joaquin Phoenix, prepare to sign a release, because it's gonna be filmed for his documentary. [Gatecrasher]
• A Friday gift: Video of Clive Owen, talking about The International. Why is the way he says "shootout" so sexy? [WSJ]
• Madonna went on a date with Jesus Luz in New York last night; they dined at a steakhouse and talked about Kabbalah. [Daily Mail]
• Before "baby" Jesus left Brazil to hang out with her Madgesty, he had two different girlfriends. [Page Six]
• Nicole Kidman has donated £230,000 to help victims of the Australian bushfires. She says: "As Australians, I think the biggest thing is that, no matter where you are in the world, we support each other and we rally." [The Sun]
• This report says that teen fashion designer Kira Plastinina may have been the cause of the Chris Brown/Rihanna fight. [Extra]
• Chris Brown has left Las Vegas and is on his way to meet his mom; she lives in Virginia but it's unclear if he is headed there or if they are meeting somewhere else. [E!]
• Reports persist that Chris and Rihanna's right started with a text from another woman; Leona Lewis, Paris Hilton and Keisha Chanté were all suspected of flirting with Chris, but all deny it. [E!]
• Roger Friedman from Fox seems to think Paris Hilton is involved. [Fox 411]
• When Rihanna wore an eyepatch in concert last year, was it because Chris Brown had injured her eye? [The Sun]
• Chris Brown is seeking a "crisis-management expert." [EW]
• Oh no: Details of how the surgery of Tameka Foster Raymond — Usher's wife — went terribly wrong: She went to Brazil to get lipo and right after she went under general anesthesia, she suffered cardiac arrest. Of course, Usher's rep issued a statement on February 8 which read: "Tameka Raymond is in stable condition after suffering complications from routine surgery in Brazil." Bold ours, obviously. This may be a case of surgery too soon after childbirth: Their second son is two months old. [People]
• Speaking of surgery, a doctor who does not treat him says Michael Jackson's nose "will collapse" after a staph infection he may have contracted after a nose job. [The Sun]
• Grey's Anatomy creator Shonda Rhimes heard that T.R. Knight and Katherine Heigl were leaving Grey's Anatomy and says: "That was a very interesting rumor. And it's not true." [People]
• Boooo: Victoria Beckham was considered to be a judge on American Idol, but she was too busy. Wouldn't you love to see Posh take on the wacky kids? [Mirror]
• Dina Lohan owes $11,485.74 in taxes on her Long Island home, and today is the deadline to pay. [TMZ]
• Oscar-nominated film-maker Stephen Daldry is pondering a remake of My Fair Lady, with Keira Knightley as Eliza Doolittle. Asks this reporter, Wouldn't it be luvverly? [Daily Mail]
• Who will score an interview with post-bong-pic Michael Phelps? [Page Six]
• Even though Hugh Grant is supposed to be with Jemima Khan, he was seen making out with two women in New York Tuesday night. [Gatecrasher]
• Monday night, Hugh Grant made out with Drew Barrymore. [Page Six]
• Sienna Miller is ShoWest 2009's supporting actress of the year. This summer she'll be in the giant GI Joe flick. [Hollywood Reporter]
• News you can't use: Kimora Lee Simmons prepared for Valentine's Day by getting her armpit hair lasered off. [Page Six]
• Eminem's new track, "Crack A Bottle," featuring Dr. Dre and 50 Cent, set a new first-week record for download sales. [Reuters]
• What is going on over at Desperate Housewives? Eva Longoria and Teri Hatcher are going to kiss in an upcoming episode? Sounds like a desperate reach for ratings. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Did anyone know that Jennifer Hudson's fiancé is training with hopes to be a WWE wrestler? [Perez]
• Mira Sorvino is pregnant with baby number 3. [ET]
• Did Michael Stipe and his entourage once visit Mario Batali's restaurant after the kitchen was closed and keep the place open, ringing up a tab of $5,000? And then not tip or say thank you?!?!?! [Perez]
• Some dude bought a Blackberry on eBay and it had phone numbers for Jude Law, Natalie Portman and Kevin Spacey programmed into it, among others. [Telegraph]
• Kevin Costner's wife Christine gave birth to a baby boy, Hayes Logan Costner, on Thursday night. They have another son named Cayden who is almost 2. [ET]
• Living legend Jane Birkin has a new album, and she wrote all of the songs herself. You may know her as Serge Gainsbourg's love interest, as Charlotte Gainsbourg's mom, or as the inspiration for the Birkin bag. [Dazed Digital]
• The band Yes has canceled concert dates due to "unforeseen" medical reasons. [AP]
• Blind item: "Which disturbed loser is more of a cad than we thought? He's spilling the beans about his former flame's kinky sex habits to anyone who'll listen." [Gatecrasher]
• "[I wanted] to be named New York senator. I can't believe Paterson didn't ask. I even had a slogan: 'Make the switch, vote for the bitch.'" — Joy Behar. [Gatecrasher]
• "I realized partying is not what I am anymore." — Tara Reid, on her new sober life. [Daily Express]
• "I adored him, and I felt adored by him... he said to be a good parent, you never say no." — Emily Mortimer, on her father, who died in January. He was an author and created of a popular UK TV series. [Daily Mail]
• "It's one of those vampire movies. It's very funny. It's me with the beard." — Salma Hayek on her facial hair in her new flick, Cirque du Freak. [USA Today]
• "Toward the end of the shoot, he kept saying 'Oh I'm so tired, I'm so tired.' You hear that kind of thing and you think it's a joke. I just ignored it. I drove up to his house because his phone was disconnected. He said, 'I don't want to act anymore, I've been doing it for 30 years and if you did something for 30 years, you'd want to quit too.' That rap thing ... in the movie actually comes from something I played for him. I had an obsession with doing that sort of thing as a teenager. ... It turns out that Joaquin is imitating me in a lot of the movie. He said, 'I want to do that, I want to steal from that, I want to do the rap that you used to do.' I said, 'OK.' And now I'm seeing him do this thing, and I feel like I've ruined Joaquin Phoenix for the world. I don't want to be the guy that destroyed Joaquin Phoenix's acting career." — James Gray, the director of Two Lovers. [ABC News]
• "You drop some weight just by running after them." — Naomi Watts on her "body after baby." [People]
• "I'm 43 years old and I haven't ever really had a good relationship." — Moby. [NY Mag]
• "Seal always puts a smile on my face. We make each other laugh all the time. Laughing is good. I understand that life is not always just a smile all the time. But when you're facing problems, it doesn't make it better if you're kind of miserable. I always try to have a positive feeling. Every morning when I get up, I'm happy to be here. Even when I'm tired because the kids have been crying in the night, they come in and want mama and crawl into my bed. They look at you and they have that smile on their faces and life is good." — Heidi Klum. [The Star]
• "The pageantry of getting your hair curled and then all these beautiful clothes put on you — it was totally different. It was an escape. In Hollywood, you feel a responsibility to look less disheveled than you are. But I'm a mom and I'm not good at putting time into prepping. I tell my girlfriends — imagine if all the time you put into waxing and primping, you took all of that energy and put it into something useful." — Isla Fisher, on getting styled for Confessions Of A Shopaholic. [WSJ]

• The 51st Annual Grammy Awards begin at 8pm tonight. Among those set to perform: Kanye West, Jennifer Hudson, Justin Timberlake, M.I.A, Radiohead, u2, and many more. And the show is "only" 3.5 hours long. [MTV]

• Whitney Houston looked "glamorous" and "triumphant" as she performed at a pre-Grammy party hosted by Clive Davis. "She was on it, she was happy - she's back," said Jamie Foxx, who was in attendance, "Everybody else watch out."[Yahoo]
• Meanwhile, Usher had to cancel his appearance at the same party, due to a "serious illness in the family." Though reports are unconfirmed, Access Hollywood is reporting that his wife, Tameka Foster, has suffered complications from cosmetic surgery. Good thoughts to Usher and his family! [Yahoo]
• In happier news, Blink 182 fans have a reason the celebrate: the band is reportedly getting back together to record a new album, and will be reuniting as presenters at tonight's Grammy ceremony. [MTV]
• Kristy Swanson and Lloyd Eisler, who met on the set of Skating With Celebrities, were married on Saturday. "We're excited about the future," Eisler says, "Kristy is getting back into acting and I'm building my coaching career. Hopefully everything will work out." [People]
• "‘I like looking nice, but I always put comfort over fashion. I don't find thin girls attractive; be happy and healthy. I've never had a problem with the way I look. I'd rather have lunch with my friends than go to a gym."-Adele [DailyMail]
• Grey's Anatomy star Chyler Leigh claims she's planning on naming her baby "Aniston." This is one time when being Team Jolie is probably the better option, no?[USMagazine]
• Kate Moss is reportedly trying to kick her smoking habit: "Kate's worried about getting wrinkle lines and she's so determined to kick the habit she has banned all her friends from smoking anywhere near her," says a source. [ShowbizSpy]
• Uh oh- is GOOP a total rip off? Dragonfly Wellness founder Mary Kate Hearon says yes. On her Facebook page, Hearon claims that she had a friend send Gwyneth her newsletter, The Weekly Beet, but when the two met, Paltrow was "was sooooooo nasty to me, it was scandalous! [Husband] Chris [Martin], the utmost gentleman, stood to shake my hand, but she smirked and was silent when I asked how her dinner was . . . I never thought in a million years she'd . . . create her own site very similar to The Weekly Beet . . . [Goop has] the therapies I've tried, the foods I love, the detoxes that work! A lot of the same stuff!"" Paltrow's reps deny the allegations. [PageSix]
• "Being in love makes you happy. Definitely. I deeply, deeply care about John [Mayer]. We talk, we adore one another. And that's where it is. Do I want to have children? I do, and I will. The women who inspire me are the ones who have families and children. Why would I want to limit myself? I want to have it all."-Jennifer Aniston [ShowbizSpy]
• Peaches Geldof and her husband, Max Drummey, have split after 6 months of marriage. [TheSun]
• What's the first thing Drew Barrymore does after a breakup? "Head straight for the carbs. Macaroni and cheese. Kraft. Deluxe. The kind with the cheese you squeeze out of a bag that takes at least a month to pass through your body."[JustJared]
• Artist Shepard Fairey, perhaps best known for his iconic Obama campaign posters, was arrested in Boston for "tagging property." [MSNBC]
• After 15 months in court, Eddie Murphy has agreed to pay roughly 10 million dollars in child support to "Scary Spice" Mel B, as well as visit the daughter he now accepts as his own, Angel Iris. [DailyMail]
• Dave Grohl has come out in support of gay marriage: "Anybody know about whiteknot.org?" Grohl asked on the red carpet of Friday's MusiCares benefit, "You know what that's about? It's I believe in love and I believe in equality and I believe in marriage equality."[E!]
• Director McG has spoken up about the Christian Bale trainwreck: "The film set is a passionate place, and it happens," McG says, "There was no version of, 'Oh, Christian is going to whip his ass.' It was just sort of a blowup. We let it run its course, and it did. You obviously only get to hear the explicit parts." [People]
• Apparently Dodai didn't suffer alone at the movies on Friday: He's Just Not That Into You led the Friday box office with 10.6 million dollars. [EW]
• "(Young women) look at all of us, myself included, on these magazine covers and they think, "My God, how does she get skin like that?" And I can tell you, I have so many blemishes under this make-up that have been so fabulously covered, I promise you. I did realise a few years ago that no one actually talks about this retouching thing. It's like a secret or something. I'm damned if it's going to be a secret any more. I really want these young women to know we don't look like this."-Kate Winslet [DailyMail]
• Angelina Jolie says that raising her kids is so time-consuming that she barely has time to get dressed. "We are having such a wonderful time raising our children together and there is a lot of love in our home. I feel very lucky," Jolie says, though the craziness of raising so many kids means she's "been home for the last year so I spend a lot of time just watching TV and I tend to be in pajamas." That's what I'm doing RIGHT NOW! Except for the kids part. But still, you guys. Clearly I am just like Angelina Jolie. I wonder if she eats Eggo waffles for breakfast, too? [ShowbizSpy]

• Amy Winehouse is going to have her fun and her husband too: "“While Blake is in jail I’m still gonna have a good time — he can’t do much about it," the singer says. [TheSun]

• Winehouse, who is currently staying at a hotel in St. Lucia, says that her wild behavior, which reportedly includes begging other guests for threesomes, grabbing female guests, and generally causing a ruckus, is just a temporary bit of fun to tide her over until her true love, Blake, is released from jail. “I still love my Blake. I won’t let him divorce me. He’s still in jail but the moment he comes out I’ll be there waiting for him," Winehouse says, “I love him because he’s just like me. Blake is the male version of me. We’re perfect for each other." [TheSun]
• The producers of Speed the Plow, the Broadway show that briefly starred Jeremy Piven before an alleged case of mercury poisoning caused the star to drop out of the play, have filed a grievance with the Actors Equity Association against Piven. Piven's publicist claims the grievance is "absurd and outrageous," which is, hilariously, exactly what everyone on earth is saying about Jeremy Piven's "mercury poisoning." [AP]
• Good news, Mad Men fans: creator Matthew Weiner has officially signed on to be a part of Season 3, which airs this summer. [HollywoodReporter]
• Nick Cannon claims that he and Mariah Carey plan to have kids...eventually. "We’re definitely into planning a family and stuff but when everything calms down and we get the time,” Cannon says, “we’re just running and gunning now and enjoying being newlyweds.”[E!]
• Brothers and Sisters star Rachel Griffiths is pregnant with baby number three. [People]
• Beyonce is beyond thrilled to be singing "At Last" for Barack and Michelle Obama's first dance at the Inauguration: "I could not be more honored and excited that they have asked me to be part of this moment in history." [USMagazine]
• Meryl Streep is speaking out about ageism; not just in Hollywood, but in every profession: "Look around the room. There are a lot of young women here who are journalists, but do you see any women my age? No. And if you look into the corporate corners of your company, there aren't a lot of women there either. But we're fighting that, and we're making inroads against discrimination." [Mirror]
• 10 years after their debut album, Tommy Lee's Methods of Mayhem is coming together for a second record. Which breaks my personal record of going 10 years without remembering that Tommy Lee had a crappy side band.[Reuters]
• LOST fans: Carlton Cuse is saying that this is the "season of Josh," meaning that we're going to get a whole lotta Sawyer this time around. [E!]
• Melissa George, the latest in a string of cast members to leave Grey's Anatomy, claims she left the show to focus on other things. Yet a "friend" says Melissa had this to say: "I was supposed to have a full-blown love affair with Callie (played by Sara Ramirez), but Shonda said the network was making too many notes on the storyline. At first she commiserated with me, but then when I'd complain, she wouldn't even talk about it. My agents calls went unanswered, and I wasn't just going to sit there. Shonda promised me something and she didn't deliver. That's when I decided it's time to go."Star]
• Bust out your giant buttons, neon shirts, and overalls: the New Kids on the Block have just announced plans for a North American tour. Donnie Wahlberg says the group can't believe the positive response they've received so far: "This is beyond our wildest dreams," Wahlberg says, "The T-shirts, the screams, the emails, the messages — it's been amazing so far, and we are all just so happy to keep it going." Hey, man. Sometimes people just wanna get on the floor and do the New Kids dance. [USMagazine]

• Holy double zygote! Star is reporting that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are having twins. Again. Fertility treatments, duh. More in Midweek Madness. [Star]
• Meanwhile, in this clip, Brad Pitt says he thinks Angelina is gorgeous: "I get up some mornings and gasp." [E!]
• Pitt's next production: Starring as a British soldier and spy in The Lost City Of Z, an epic flick about Percy Fawcett, who left Victorian society to explore in the Amazon. [Variety]
• Wow, don't call it a comeback: Britney's Circus is the number one CD in the country, with 505,073 copies sold (which means it's gone gold). Of course, Oops! I Did It Again sold 1,319,193 units during its first week of sales, which means it was platinum — and eventually went diamond. But congrats! [AP, The.Life Files]

• Remember how Lindsay Lohan was seen with Sean Penn? They're thinking about possibly doing a film together. Is she working on… anything? [Page Six]
• Even though Jennifer Hudson has been in seclusion since her family was murdered in October, she will begin filming a video for her new single, "If This Isn't Love," next week. Back to work. [AP, USA Today]
• The woman under arrest for murder says that Mark Ruffalo's brother, Scott, died after playing Russian roulette. She's claiming Scott was a known cocaine user who played with guns in front of various witnesses. [NY Daily News]
• Mark Ruffalo has released a statement, which reads, in part: "Mark Ruffalo and his family deeply appreciate the outpouring of prayers and support during this most difficult time of the passing of Scott Ruffalo, beloved son, brother and husband. The funeral service will be private." [TMZ]
• And now the woman arrested in the shooting death of Scott Ruffalo has been cleared; the gunshot wound was, in fact, apparently self-inflicted. [Yahoo News via AP]
• This report claims that Shaha Adham, the woman accused in the Ruffalo murder, is a "dime-a-dozen Saudi princess." [MediaBistro]
• There's a new lawsuit in the Travis Barker/DJ Am plane crash: The surviving wife and son of Chris Baker, Barker's best friend and assistant, has filed with L.A. County Superior Court that the pilots "negligently decided to abort and/or reject the takeoff." [TMZ]
• Nicole Richie's jewelry line, House Of Harlow 1960, has debuted; look for it at ShopKitson.com. Nic Rich sez: "Obviously, the birth of my daughter is the best thing ever. Just in general, it's been a really great year for me. Everything's just kind of coming together. All of my dreams are becoming a reality." And does Harlow like fashion? "She likes to dress up. You can see it in her face. I'm not too caught up in her fashion at the moment. I just let her wear what's comfortable for her. But she loves tights." [USA Today]
• Gossip Girl gossip: Blake Lively and Penn Badgley might be on the rocks! Blake was seen making out with a random blond dude, and the next morning, Blake and Penn had an "awkward brunch." In other GG news, Ed "I'm Chuck Bass" Westwick was seen "really drunk." [Yahoo News via E!]
• Maybe making out: Gossip Girl's Chace Crawford and Taylor Momsen. [Page Six]
• Leonardo DiCaprio lost his wallet, but found it again. [Page Six]
• Since Anne Hathaway is promoting Bride Wars, naturally, reporters are asking her about marriage. She says: "Of course, like everyone, I'm kind of going through a moment where I'm like, 'Do I even believe in marriage? What's going on?' I do think eventually someday — if I met the right person — I would get married." [Daily Express]
• Twilight fans! Get your own Robert Pattinson doll, complete with bizarre eyeliner, pastel lipstick and artfully disheveled hair. [Best Week Ever]
• El oh el. This story claims "Robert Pattinson's masculinity ended his modeling career." [Daily Express]
• Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham says she cringes when she sees pictures of herself where her "boobs were around her neck." So do we! And there are plenty of pix in this story, so click away. [Daily Mail]
• Grey's Anatomy's T.R. Knight is looking to be released from his contract: "He’s not inspired by his story, by George," a source says. "He’s convinced he can do films. It’s as simple as that." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Jim Carrey broke three ribs doing a pratfall for his new movie Yes Man. "But the first thing I thought of was 'must look cool, man.'" [The Star]
• Whatever you do, don't call Jeremy Piven "Ari Gold." [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which TV actor secretly gets very friendly with the same sex, despite a slew of female exes?" [Gatecrasher]
• Apparently Paul McCartney has dozens of wild boar on his estate in Peasmarsh, East Sussex, UK, and neighbors claim they're damaging crops, trees and gardens. It's legal to "humanely" "cull" the boar — culll as in KILL — and McCartney refuses, because, as we all know, he's an animal rights advocate. [Telegraph]
• Carrie Fisher on her electroshock therapy: "They put you to sleep, and the electricity is just in your head. It wiped out four months of memory, but at my age, what's going to happen in four months that won't happen again?" [USA Today]
• Will Ferrell made a scene at the Oscar De La Hoya fight in Vegas. [Page Six]
• Brody Jenner is talking about The Hills but not saying anything interesting. [Yahoo News via E!]
• Some photographer knocked over Joan Rivers? How dare he! [Page Six]
• Jon Schneider, aka Bo Duke, had his SUV stolen from a mall outside of L.A. last week — and there were two puppies, meant to be Christmas gifts for his kids, inside. The car's been recovered, but the puppies are still missing! Click and see how cute they are. [TMZ, AP]
• Remember how DMX has been a wanted man? He's now in custody, after being arrested in Florida yesterday. He'll be sent to Arizona, where he'll face charges of drug possession, identity theft, and animal cruelty. Gonna make me lose my mind up in here! [Perez Hilton]
• The woman who accused actor-writer Tyler Perry of stealing her play for his movie, Diary Of A Mad Black Woman, lost her lawsuit. [Yahoo News via AP]
• You guys know that Darius Rucker, the black guy from Hootie and the Blowfish, is a country singer now, right? "I'm used to being the only black guy," he says. "I've seriously walked onstage, looked out in the audience, 15,000 people — and I'm the only one in the place. It's no big deal. My whole career's been like that… I just want to play." [WaPo]
• Wanna see what the creepy banjo kid in Deliverance looks like all growed up? [TMZ]
• "I am NOT pregnant." — Katie "Jordan" Price. [Daily Mail]
• "I'll smoke anything that comes around. It doesn't matter to me what type it is. People like to give me it. They feel that I shouldn't be without it. The vaporizer makes it easier on my lungs, because I was coughing and wheezing a lot" — Willie Nelson in Rolling Stone. [Page Six]
• "It seems that 'human rights' has become a bit of a loaded term in this country, but if you look at the declaration that countries made 60 years ago, it just sets out a series of basic rules about how people should treat each other… I wanted to be part of this film for Amnesty to help raise awareness of the UDHR and to help them, in a small way, to campaign against the abuses of human rights that are still happening every day." — Keira Knightley, who is part of Amnesty International's Protect the Human campaign and in a short film about the adoption of the UN Universal Declaration of Human Rights (UDHR). [The Star]
• "[If there were no paparazzi] I would take Harlow to the park. I feel that sometimes I don't get to do everything that I want to do with her. But you know what? I'm not complaining at all. She has a really great life. My life is what it is, and people have it a lot worse than me." — Nicole Richie. [USA Today]

• Holy Xenu! Katie Holmes looks freakin awesome on the cover of T: The New York Times Style Magazine. She claims she is not the pawn of Tom Cruise: "There's a misperception about me that I just became this wallflower, this woman who doesn't have any control of her life. "And that's pretty wrong. From the very beginning, I've made choices in my life that have been very strong." Plus: "When I met Tom I was completely in love and, yes, I admired him growing up — he's Tom Cruise! When I met him, he was so warm and I thought, Wow! You can be a superstar and a human being. He made me feel so amazing." [People]
• Another glamorous shot of Katie, and one of Tom Cruise, from T Magazine. [Pop Sugar]
• Amy Winehouse has "escaped" from her hospital bed and went to a recording studio and a friend's house before returning to the hospital "in the early hours." Sneaky! [The Sun]
• Alex Rodriguez speaks! About his relationship with Madonna! "We're friends – that's it. I've been to two [of her] concerts, yet I've read that I went to 20. I've also read that we were buying an apartment together. That is absolutely ridiculous and not true." [People]

• ¡Caliente! Rumor has it Shakira will perform at Barack Obama's inauguration in January. [Perez Hilton]
• Boy George: Found guilty! He falsely imprisoned a Norwegian male escort after a nude photoshoot, and will be sentenced January 16. [Yahoo News, Mirror,
• The escort told the court that Boy George yelled at him: "Fucking whore! Now you're going to get what you deserve." Guardian]
• Apparently Jennifer Aniston went on Oprah and talked about an Obama cake that she'd made? John Mayer says: "Jen and I made that cake together. She didn't really give me any credit for that cake. I was the architect on that cake. I put a lot of my time in designing that cake. I was a good man. I shared the process. From mixing to frosting….[she] took all the credit." He adds what seems to be a lame joke: "There's some trouble but we're getting over it…We're having therapy everyday in Brentwood…and we're figuring this out because that was my time to shine on Oprah." [Perez Hilton]
• Speaking of Oprah: Contrary to reports, her show may not end in 2011. "I'm not done!" she says. "I'm a very multi-dimensional woman. I can do a show. I can have OWN [the Oprah Winfrey Network]. I can have a magazine. I can do radio." You tell 'em! [UPI]
• Beyoncé's on the cover of Elle and admits that having a kid scares the crap out of her: "I'm terrified of having a child," she says. m terrified of delivering a child because I saw my nephew being born. That traumatized me. I'm only 27. I've got time." [People]
• Jennifer Hudson, who has been in seclusion since members of her family were killed, was nominated for four Grammys on Wednesday. She says: "It's been a childhood dream of mine to release an album, so to receive four Grammy nominations is truly a blessing. I am extremely honored and humbled by the nominations." [AP]
• George Clooney has a crush on a waitress. Also: The sky is blue. [The Sun]
• By the by, Clooney just raised £10 million for the victims of Darfur at a fancy London party. Guests included Matt Damon, Scarlett Johansson, Cindy Crawford, Sarah Ferguson, Bono and Guy Ritchie. [Daily Mail]
• Guy Ritchie's Sherlock Holmes movie is disrupting residents of one street in London, and they want to reduce the number of days he can shoot there. They'd also love it if Guy would give them some cash. [Daily Express]
• Kate Moss is throwing a party to announce that she is pregnant?!? [ONTD]
• David Duchovny and Tea Leoni were spotted taking their kids out for frozen yogurt in New York and being lovey-dovey. It seems they may move into a new apartment together this month and are "working on" their relationship. [Star]
• If you care to see the impossibly sunny, blonde, annoying pictures of Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt on their honeymoon, go ahead and click, you will not be judged. [Just Jared]
• Spencer is pissed that Heidi's mom is "furious" about the wedding and says he won't visit the in-laws for the holidays: "After that statement, the Pratts, as in Heidi Pratt and Spencer Pratt, will probably have their own Christmas tree out here," he says. Of course, all of this seems to be part of the "script" for The Hills. So. [E!]
• Shia LaBeouf had to drop out of a new film because "his hand is totally shattered, it’s much worse than anyone thought." He needs more surgery, you guys. [Fox 411]
• Was The House Bunny a hit? Anna Faris is "capitalizing" on it by lining up two new projects; a female buddy comedy and a romantic comedy. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Amy Adams will star in the film adaptation of the novel The Ten Best Days Of My Life, about a woman who dies and goes to heaven, but has to prove her worth by recounting her 10 best days. [Variety]
• The National Board of Review has named Anne Hathaway 2008's best actress for Rachel Getting Married; Slumdog Millionaire was best picture. [People]
• No one wants to live in the SoHo loft where Heath Ledger died. Even if you have $26,000 a month, you can't rent it now — it's temporarily off the market. [TMZ, Page Six]
• Heather Locklear was on The Tonight Show and admitted that she had a tough year. But! She has a sense of humor about her pill-popping DUI bust. "I've been better, but I'm good today," she said. And when Jay Leno asked if she would have done differently this year, she joked: "I would have stayed in my house." [People]
• Grey's Anatomy fans can find out a big secret about Denny's "afterlife love affair with Izzie" by clicking this link. [EW]
• Blythe Danner made oral sex jokes at a cocktail reception in honor of the Bruce Paltrow Oral Cancer fund. She lost her husband to the disease six years ago. [WWD]
• Miley Cyrus is not divorcing her parents, but if she did, it would be a lot easier for the 16-year-old to date a 20-year-old underwear model. [Yahoo News via E!]
• Jim Carrey, Spike Lee, Amy Poehler, Twilight's Kristen Stewart, Richard Gere, Zooey Deschanel, and Ashton Kutcher are among the stars with flicks in the Sundance Film Festival. Will there be a breakout indie hit this year? [USA Today]
• Former SNL star Rachel Dratch is in a musical, and it might go to Broadway. "It's about a burlesque club the cops are trying to shut down," she says. "It has crazy burlesque dancing and clever dance numbers. I'm not in them, I just watch." [NY Mag]
• Cops are looking for 2 people in the shooting of Mark Ruffalo's brother, though a motive has not been released. [AP]
• Bob Dylan's room at the famed Chelsea Hotel in New York: Destroyed. Sledgehammered and ripped up, in the name of renovations. [Gothamist]
• Someone is suing Dixie Chicks singer Natalie Maines for defamation, and it has to do with the 1993 murders of three boys. [AP]
• Kathy Griffin tried to smooth things over with Clay Aiken, whom she called Gayken in her standup act, way before he came out, and she claims: "I would have to say he was not very nice." [E!]
• Some dumb paparazzi asked Robin Williams' daughter Zelda why her dad wasn't partying with her: "You don't take an alcoholic out to a club," she explained. Also, why would she be clubbing with her dad? [TMZ]
• Rocker Joe Satriani is suing Coldplay, accusing the band of plagiarizing one of his songs. [Yahoo News]
• David Hasselhoff's ex wife: Kicked out of the Hoff's house. By a judge. [TMZ]
• The Real World: Brooklyn is coming to MTV January 7th. The "strangers" living in the house are an Iraq war veteran, a former beauty queen, a hip hop dancing hippie, a punk rock Mormon, a dolphin trainer, a computer geek, an abs model and an advocate for victims of abuse. Good luck! [MTV.com]
• Not a joke: Pete Doherty will replace Pete Townshend in The Who. For one night only. For charity. [The Sun]
• Did you know that before Madonna was cast in Evita, Michelle Pfeiffer had the role? Click to hear her sing some demo tracks. [ONTD]
• Erik Estrada must love being, not just playing a cop: He'll be working the night shift at the Muncie Police Department in Indiana this week. [USA Today]
• UK's Channel 4 is poking fun at the death of Princess Diana? [Daily Mail]
• RIP Paul Benedict, also known as Bentley from The Jeffersons. [AP]
• "I was separated from my dad for most of my life, but we forgave each other for whatever had happened. It’s huge for me. He’s been the most supportive dad. No matter what has happened, he’s always been there. And especially right now - he’s been so great. He really helped me out." — Evan Rachel Wood, who reunited with her father over Thanksgiving. [Perez Hilton]
• "I knew I wanted to marry Kate when I met her. After our very first date, I was sure. At one point, I thought she was going to ask me to marry her first and I cut her off by changing the subject. I wanted to ask her." — Tom Cruise in T: The New York Times Style Magazine. [People]
• "I've been recording in between periods of romantic torture, which is the concept of this album. Writing these songs has been my saving grace. I have felt in the past like a marionette. This album is my freedom. When you're in love, you've found your soul mate, you think life is going one way, and suddenly it's completely apparent it's not. You have to rethink your whole purpose." — Scott Weiland on his solo album, Happy In Galoshes. [USA Today]
• "Our behaviour is changing. Look at how we re-use and recycle. I want to see people at movie premieres wearing outfits they’ve had for 10 years." — Sigourney Weaver, on how Hollywood can cope with the economic crisis. [Daily Express]

• Full House star Jodie Sweetin, who recently turned her life around after a trip down Child-Star-Turned-Meth-Addict lane, is divorcing her husband of 16 months, Cody Herpin. Herpin, who Sweetin credits with helping her in her recovery process, claims he is "dumbfounded" by the divorce and is worried about the couple's 7-month-old daughter, Zoie. "Over this past month something has been different," Herpin says, "I'm concerned about our daughter and I just want (Zoie) home." [People]

• Things are not looking good for Lindsay and Sam: according to a "source," the couple had yet another fight last night in Dubai during a hotel launch party. "At one stage Lindsay approached Sam in the DJ booth and screamed at her, 'How many more songs? How long is it going to take for you to pack up?"' The pair have apparently been "fighting like cats and dogs," and as Dodai reported yesterday, are reportedly looking at couples therapy to help them patch things up. [DailyMail]

• Jessica Simpson is thrilled about her new nephew, Bronx Mowgli Wentz. "Bronx is beyond precious," Simpson tells US Magazine, "I'm over the moon with joy. Life is a beautiful miracle.[US Magazine]

• Meanwhile, a baby-naming expert doesn't think Bronx Mowgli will set off a baby-name trend. Ya think? [US Magazine]

• Is Britney gearing up for a world tour? Apparently she was in court yesterday to discuss the possibility, according to court spokesman Allan Parachini: "There isn't a lot I can tell you about it. There was discussion of Ms. Spears' future immediate business plans. Particularly touring in support of her album."[E!]

• Aaron Eckhart had only lovely things to say about his co-star, Jennifer Aniston: "It was wonderful; she was awesome to work with. Good friend, sweet girl, total pro. She has just a heart of gold, and I totally enjoyed the experience.”[E!]

• Twilight is already raking it in at the box office: the film has taken in over 27 million dollars so far.[HuffingtonPost]

• President Bush's daughter, Barbara, has some advice for the Obama girls: "I think my advice to them is just, when they move...just make really good friends and surround themselves with people that will protect them because they love them regardless."[US Magazine]

• Are you in the market for a slightly-used couch? Well you're in luck, because Jenna Jameson is selling hers on Ebay in order to raise money for the twins she's currently pregnant with.[ASocialite'sLife]

• Can't wait until 2009 to catch a glimpse of the upcoming Bruno film? A sneak peak can be found here.[FashionWeekDaily]

• Travis Barker has filed a lawsuit against Bombardier Inc., Clay Lacy Aviation and Goodyear Tire and Rubber for their role in the crash that killed 4 of Barker's fellow passengers and left Barker severely burned last September. Barker claims that the Learjet from the crash was "defective," noting that "it's landing gear, tires, wheels, brakes, reverse thrust system, squat switches and component parts were not airworthy." Barker has been making progress since the tragedy:"I'm already playing my drums again," he says, "and I'm already back in the studio." [US Magazine]

• Paris Hilton and Benji Madden aren't broken up, you guys. They're just "taking a break," according to Paris. "He's my best friend," Hilton told Ryan Seacrest yesterday, "He's been so great to me, so loyal. He is an incredible person, and we will always be really close. We'll see what happens in the future. I'm still in love with him." [US Magazine]

• Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer were seen being quite affectionate with one another while having dinner with John's parents: ""Jennifer was constantly rubbing his hair and John was rubbing her back, then every so often they would steal a kiss. They both looked very happy and very much in love.” [TheSun]

• Don't expect to hear about Jennifer's love life on her Facebook page, however. "[Facebook is] not for me," she says, "I’d be opening myself up too much. I don’t want to sound like a complete innocent — I’ve looked at things, of course. But it’s such spewing. If I look at it, I’ll be affected. It’s like dancing with the devil." [Just Jared]

• Is Michael Cera the only cast member not on board with the upcoming Arrested Development movie? [LaineyGossip]

• Sarah Jessica Parker had no idea that removing her mole would be such a huge deal: "If I knew it was famous I never would have had it removed," Parker says, "My health is terrific. I never thought anybody had any emotional attachment to that mole. I certainly didn't. It was just one of those things where I had a couple weeks and I thought, "I can finally get that mole removed," like many people do. It was an incredibly slow news week . . . One woman said to me, "That's your signature!" I said, "That's my signature?! All these years of being worried about the work, I could have just counted on my mole?!"[PopSugar]

• Kissing Jessica Stein star Jennifer Westfeldt (who also happens to be Don Draper's girlfriend) will be joining the cast of Grey's Anatomy as a patient for a "multi-episode arc." [EW]

• Tila Tequila will be replaced by a set of bisexual twins for the next installment of A Shot At Love, which will now be titled, of course, A Double Shot At Love. Apparently the original title, OMG When Are People Going To Stop With The Sexy Twin Incest Biz, Seriously MTV, You Cancelled 120 Minutes For Shit Like This!? was a little too long.[People]

• Sean Penn: Lousy gay lover! Diego Luna was asked about kissing Sean for Milk and said, "It was...dry." He added: "I guess he was thinking about Franco." But costar James Franco claims kissing Sean was "fine." Not hot, steamy, fun. Fine. [E!]
• Britney's youngest son, Jayden, has been released from the hospital. He was rushed to the emergency room on Sunday is because he had an allergic reaction to something he ate. The 2-year-old had hives, was itchy and irritable. The family is "just not sure" what triggered the reaction. [Page Six, TMZ]
• Madonna had a dinner party at her apartment and invited her non-Kabbalah friends, so they could meet her "friend" Alex Rodriguez. [Mirror]
• Madonna let Guy see his sons! There's a picture of Rocco and David at the airport, hugging Guy. Apparently Madonna has a list of demands that Guy must meet while the kids are with him in London. It includes a ban on TV, non-organic food and clothes not sent by her. For some reason, can't you picture Guy getting the kids hopped up on sugar and Disney cartoons? [Daily Mail]
• People and Us Weekly put Barack Obama on their covers, and those issues sold extremely well. America wasn't interested in Jennifer Aniston or Suri Cruise last week? Really? [MSNBC]

• Will a Barack Obama documentary sweep the Emmys? It's co-produced by Ed Norton… [LA Times]
• Malia and Sasha Obama might get to visit the set of Hannah Montana! "The invitation is there," Billy Ray Cyrus says. "The Hannah Montana film comes out in April. Maybe something might happen around then. Maybe not. I don’t know… I have got to keep a secret." Uh, too late! [Access Hollywood]
• Michelle Williams' dad, Larry Williams, a prominent stock market trader, has agreed to return to the U.S. to face tax evasion charges. He's been in Australia, though he's actually a resident of the Virgin Islands. He possibly owes $1.5 million in unpaid taxes. [Yahoo News]
• Here's a snippet from the Blake Lively interview in W magazine: "Lively doesn’t even attempt to hide her glee at all the freebies foisted upon her, from designer dresses and diamond bangles to an utterly insane number of pricey purses. 'I probably have, like, 60 gorgeous bags,' she says. 'I have a closet with my really sharp, fancy, nice ones—the ones that go with my Valentino pumps, for example. And then I have a closet with the ones that are a little more rugged-feeling, the kind that go with my Belstaff motorcycle boots.'" [W]
• Juliette Lewis met Ed Westwick and said, "Who is this guy?" Someone's not watching Gossip Girl. He's Chuck Bass! [Rush & Molloy]
• The creators of Gossip Girl say the show is like "a chess game." See, "Chuck and Blair are the king and queen. Everyone else, except Serena, is a pawn.” Hmm, isn't the show more like Trouble, what with the pop-o-matic dice and the moving in circles? Wait, what was the question again? [People]
• Amy Winehouse "lost it" after finding out Blake Fielder-Civil contacted the "other woman" when he got out of jail. Blake Formerly Incarcerated says, "She hasn’t dumped me. We both love each other and will be together for ever. We have spoken on the phone and I’m expecting a visit from her any time now. We can’t wait to be back together." Keep hope alive! [The Sun]
• When asked about the rumors linking him to Evan Rachel Wood, Mickey Rourke said, "She's a good friend, that's it. Tell that faggot who wrote all that shit in the paper I'd like to break his fucking legs." Whoops! Mickey's sorry! Rourke has released a statement which reads, "I want to sincerely apologize for the derogatory word I used. It was insensitive and inappropriate of me and I am deeply sorry that I may have offended anyone." [Yahoo News via E!]
• Nicole Kidman was on Oprah yesterday, and at O's urging, she pulled out a picture of her baby, Sunday Rose. [Perez Hilton]
• Speaking of Nicole, something is up with her new flick, Australia. The studio forced director Baz Luhrmann to change the ending, but don't click unless you want to know, this entire article is a spoiler alert. [LA Times]
• Mariah Carey's demands for the World Music Awards: A £100,000 private jet transport to the ceremony in Monte Carlo and a £10,000-a-night penthouse suite at the exclusive Hotel de Paris for two nights. Plus! VIP treatment for her 15-member entourage. [Daily Mail]
• Mariah was on Simon Cowell's X Factor over the weekend, and some people are saying it was one of her worst performances ever. Click for video and judge for yourself. (My 2¢: Her voice is not what it used to be.) [The.Life Files]
• Blind item! "Which proud new papa isn't much of a family guy? The handsome actor, notorious for having a roving eye, was spotted leaving a downtown hot spot with the beautiful bartender." [Rush & Molloy]
• Evan Rachel Wood claims the Obama camp wanted Marilyn Manson to play for Barack. A spokesperson says, "That it not true." [Yahoo News]
• Isaiah Washington is speaking out about Brooke Smith being fired from Grey's Anatomy: "I looked at a brilliant actress, whom I have adored since I first saw her in Silence of the Lambs. For her to be treated this way, I find very interesting. The fact is that, just before the holidays, you have a mother, a wonderful actress removed from a steady income without the proper reasoning behind it…You look at the way another consummate professional [is] being treated because her character, her story line [has] potentially made producers uncomfortable. Now that I see what they're doing to a show that I love and I care about, I think it's disgusting. The fact that Shonda has been put in this position is extremely unfair. It's unfortunate because it was probably, at the time, the most progressive show on television. Now I see it [being] systematically torn apart. Bring Burke back!" Yeah, that's right, Burke. Not Brooke. He's talking about himself, you see. [Perez Hilton
• Oh dear: Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt will guest star on How I Met Your Mother. Well, at least Heidi's psuedo-employed after losing her fake job. [E!, People]
• America Ferrera will star and executive produce a drama called American Tragic, about a young war vet who sets off across the country with a buddy to find redemption. Ferrera will play his wife. [Variety]
• Queen Latifah will host the People's Choice Awards on January 7. [Variety]
• Are Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel getting married or not? (Seems like "not.") [MSNBC]
• Tim Robbins is still battling the New York City board of elections. Did he show up to the wrong polling place? Or did they change his location without him knowing? [Page Six, NY Times]
• Regis Philbin gave his old elementary school $1.5 million in 2005; it's since been shut down. Think he wishes he had the cash back? [Page Six]
• Will Eminem's new CD come out on time? There was a December due date, but a source says, "He is being a perfectionist and is completely obsessive-compulsive about this album. There's a 50-50 chance it will be done by the end of this year - but most likely it'll be the first quarter of next year." After this long, why rush? [Page Six]
• NBC's Medium returns in January with new castmember Tracy Pollan, aka Mrs. Michael J. Fox. [EW]
• In Roger Moore's memoir, you learn that that during the filming of Live and Let Die, his first Bond flick, he had kidney stones, so he took a painkiller, methylene, that both knocked him out and turned his urine blue. He woke up in the middle of the night, mistook his closet for a bathroom and peed all over his clothes, "dying them a delightful azure." [Time]
• Kelsey Grammer on Sarah Palin: "I don't know that she doesn't know that Africa is a continent… And if I read it in the New York Times, I have to get a second source." Damn librul media! [TMZ]
• The Dallas reunion was a Texas-sized mess! Hundreds more people than expected showed up for Saturday night's barbecue and cast reunion at Southfork Ranch; angry fans complained they didn't get the access to cast members they'd paid $500 to see; while others got close to the stars without paying. [Yahoo News]
• By the by, Mayim Bialik, the star of '90s sit com Blossom, had a baby about a month or two ago. Her second child, a boy named Fred. [TMZ]
• Former boy band mogul, Lou Perlman, is discussed in a new book, and the consensus is the dude is "creepy" and tried to "wrestle" with the boys he managed. Perlman's currently serving a 25-year jail sentence for conspiracy, money laundering, etc. [Rush & Molloy]
• Actress Gong Li: Being called a traitor, because she's decided to become a Singaporean citizen. (She was born and raised in China.) [Breitbart]
• Tony Dow, who played Wally on Leave It To Beaver, will have one of his abstract sculptures on display at the Louvre. Upgrade! [Yahoo News]
• Headline of the day: "Fleetwood Mac's Lindsey Buckingham wants to play a song for President George W Bush called 'Treason.'" [Telegraph]
• WTF. Another William Shatner video, in which he talks shit about George Takei. [Perez Hilton]
• James Cromwell, who starred in the Babe movies, is recovering from a broken collarbone and partially deflated lung after falling off of his bicycle in an L.A.-area canyon on Sunday. He should be out of the hospital now. That'll do! [AP]
• Geri Halliwell has dumped her "toyboy" lover, dancer Ivan "Flipz" Velez. He's devastated. Maybe his new middle name will be "Mopez." [Mirror]
• Here's a rare photograph of Marilyn Monroe in stockings and garters. [Telegraph]
• Chris March of Project Runway was interviewed by a snarky New York magazine editor and wasn't really amused. The writer was mocking Seal's facial scars, though, so: Team March. [NY Mag]
• Beyoncé says offers have come in from magazines wanting wedding pictures and it's "crazy money that's just ridiculous." Don't worry, B is classier than that: "It's so not worth it. If anything, if you wanna put something out, then put it out, not for (money). We worked really hard at keeping it private. I've always been this way, and he's always been this way, so that's why we complement each other. We always knew that it would be private and quiet, for all the right reasons." [AP]
• Here's a lovely poem Chuck Norris has written about Barack Obama's "political stink." It rhymes! [E&P Pub]
• "He’s never let himself become a lost cause. He’s hardcore and very strong. Off-duty he flies his own plane and helicopter and he insists on doing as many of his own stunts as possible. It’s him riding the bikes and throwing the punches — he doesn’t palm it off to a stunt man." — Jamie Milnes, Harrison Ford's personal trainer, on working with him for Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull. [Telegraph]
• "I thought it would be easy to cast a Bond girl, because there are so many beautiful women in this world. But not many of them can act. Their acting needed to be really strong and three-dimensional. Historically, the role of women in the world has changed. You can't have someone in a Bond film just as a sex object. [But] they have to be sexy and beautiful. That's what people expect, and that's what Bond is about." — Quantum Of Solace director Marc Forster. [Esquire]
• "I call her 'The Mouse.' And The Mouse holds on to the edge of a chair now and is gaining the confidence to think, 'Maybe these legs belong to me.' I keep telling Nicole that it's a bad sign, because once those legs gain confidence, then they're out of here!" — Lionel Richie on 10-month-old granddaughter Harlow. [People]
• "She taught me the importance of looking good and feeling good but also that beauty comes from within, because it fades. I looked at her like a therapist and a makeover queen –- the perfect glamorous smart woman. People would walk in, talk to her and tell her their issues and they'd walk out feeling and looking like a new woman." — Beyoncé, on her mother, who owned a hair salon when B was a kid. [People]
• "It's cool when you have a movie where you can show another side of yourself, like this one does. The movie is not going to be successful, I don't think. It's not the usual Van Damme action movie, so I'm not really kicking butt. People who know me, they know my story, that I came with nothing and because famous with martial arts. I did the movie because it felt good to do something like that. [I won't do a reality show because] I don't want to expose my family or even my animals to the cameras all the time. You can't even go to the toilet because they shove a camera up your butt. I would probably throw the camera out the window. They did approach me once, though — the channel with the guy with the long hair. Gene Simmons? [Checks with son.] No, it was Ozzy Osbourne, who's a big teddy bear. A letter came to my desk and he wanted to know if I'd do a reality show. Bad or good, only God should know what you're doing at all times." — Jean-Claude Van Damme. [WSJ]
• "It was OK. I wasn’t into the waif thing. She kind of looked like my nephew. I mean she’s beautiful – she’s a very pretty nephew – but I’m more into curvy women." — Mark Wahlberg on posing with Kate Moss in those 1992 Calvin Klein ads. [The Sun]
• "I'm running a business. And sometimes being the boss of your own empire and creation, you have to be assertive. Being a female, that comes with being labeled a 'bitch' and given titles that men wouldn’t receive. But if that’s what I’m going to be called by being assertive and knowing who I am and what I want out of life, so be it. I wear that label proudly." — Christina Aguilera in Rolling Stone. [MSNBC]
• "I apparently offended some animal lovers. Um, really people? I love animals as much as anyone, I don't eat pork – so for those of you fighting that good fight against me ... shut up! I was just pointing out the fact that people in California seem to care more about animal rights than human rights … I'm not running around killing chickens for fun or firing a slingshot at a squirrel." — Samantha Ronson, resonding to people who were offended by her Prop 2 vs. Prop 8 post. [People]
• "[I said] 'Sen. Obama, when you were in school in Boston, did you encounter any racism?' And he said something really interesting. He said, um. He said, 'I'm Kanye West.'" — Sarah Silverman. [Page Six]

"Brooke Smith was obviously not fired for playing a lesbian. Clearly it's not an issue as we have a lesbian character on the show – Calliope Torres. Sara Ramirez is an incredible comedic and dramatic actress and we wanted to be able to play up her magic. Unfortunately, we did not find that the magic and chemistry with Brooke's character would sustain in the long run. The impact of the Callie/Erica relationship will be felt and played out in a story for Callie. I believe it belittles the relationship to simply replace Erica with 'another lesbian.' If you'll remember, Cristina mourned the loss of Burke for a full season."

TV critics are being extremely vocal about this issue. EW's Michael Slezak writes, "Brooke Smith's Grey's Anatomy ouster is not right and not okay… Was it the lesbianism they objected to, or the fact that Dr. Hahn didn't bake muffins or decorate lockers or act generally flighty-flaky-cutesy or hook up with hot male colleagues to help her sort out her sexual orientation? Yeah, you could say I'm outraged." Melissa Silverstein from the Women & Hollywood blog says, "I loved the storyline for so many reasons, especially because neither Smith nor Ramirez were stick thin." And Mary McNamara of the LA Times offers this theory:

"I suspect what irked whoever made the call… [was] not that they were both women — good heavens, how dull — but that they were, how shall we say, average size. With hips, you know, and actual breasts. Not two girly waifs exchanging a stolen kiss or a grope in the women's room stall over a line of coke, not an androgynous club kid putting her best moves on some sitcom heroine. But two women of substance, physically and psychologically, falling in love and talking about it way too much, the way women tend to do."

Women & Hollywood's Silverstein also points out that the timing is suspect: "Remember the term from West Wing 'taking out the trash?' That's when they dump news on a day when nobody will notice. Me thinks ABC did some trash dumping last night." And it is interesting that today is the day California voters vote on Proposition 8, which seeks to outlaw gay marriage in the state. It's tough when you don't know what the network execs — or even Shonda Rhimes — are really thinking, but doesn't it seem like Grey's Anatomy missed out on an opportunity to make some truly groundbreaking television?

Exclusive: 'Grey's Anatomy' Discharges Dr. Hahn, Brooke Smith's 'Grey's Anatomy' Ouster Is Not Right And Not Okay [EW]
Critic's Notebook: Brooke Smith's Firing Is Bad For 'Grey's Anatomy,' And The World [LA Times]
ABC Freaks Out About Gay Grey's Storyline [Women & Hollywood]
'Grey's Anatomy' Has Change Of Heart About Dr. Hahn [USA Today]

• Ryan Gosling. Rachel McAdams. Back together. [Perez Hilton]
• Ellen blogs about her nuptials! "I had a big, big weekend. I got married to Portia de Rossi! Sorry, John Stamos… this one's taken. The wedding was everything we hoped it could be. I wish I could've invited all of you. But I have some pictures and video I can show you when Season 6 starts on September 8. I can't wait to see them too… it was all a blur. Blissfully yours, The just married Mrs. DeGeneres." [ET]
• LeRoi Moore, the sax player in the Dave Matthews Band, has died. He was injured in an ATV accident June 30 and suffered a punctured lung and broken ribs. Sudden complications from that accident sent him to the hospital yesterday, where he passed away unexpectedly. He was 46. [TMZ]
• Here's the latest on the Aniston/Mayer breakup: A source says, "She is so intent on getting married and having children, he felt hemmed in. After a 20-minute phone conversation, he just said, 'I can't take it any more,' and hung up. Then he texted, 'That's it - the end.'" Pretty please, can this be THE END of reports about these two? [Mirror]

• Madonna drank "Crack Baby" shots on her birthday, which are made with vodka and champagne. Blech. [Page Six]
• Elizabeth Taylor is back home and doing well after being hospitalized. She's planning trips to Europe and Hawaii and weighing in on holiday packaging for her perfume line White Diamonds. Be well, Liz! [Yahoo News]
• What you didn't see on The Hills: Heidi and Spencer running their mouths. Oh, and apparently Lauren went out with Doug Reinhardt back when she was in high school. [E!]
• Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham is preparing to sue a U.K. magazine over an article claiming she's "hooked on sex and diet pills." Apparently she doesn't take diet pills. No word on the sex. [Yahoo News]
• Michael Phelps' Saturday night race pulled a hell of a lot of viewers for NBC, but The Golden Girls is still the most-watched Saturday night show of the last 18 years. Thank you for being a friend! [Yahoo News]
• BTdubs, swimmer Amanda Beard is not dating Michael Phelps. "Ew, no!" she says. [MSNBC]
• Revealed! Jessica Alba's baby weight-loss plan! Low-fat, low-carb diet! Core exercises! Cardio and circuit training! Working out with a girlfriend! Kill me now! [People]
• Sharon Stone, 50, is dating a dude named Chase who is 24. That is all. [Perez Hilton]
• This report says that Balthazar Getty's wife Rosetta is convinced he started hooking up with Sienna when he and Rosetta were still together. Sick of this story yet? [Mirror]
• Chris Martin says he'll never trash a hotel room — because he used to clean them. "When you’re a cleaner and you walk into a trashed room, it’s truly annoying… Spare a thought for the poor schmuck cleaning the room." [The Sun]
• Amy Winehouse has booked into a rehab clinic just a short drive from Blake Incarcerated's jail. [The Sun]
• The Australian men's sailing team won a gold medal yesterday after getting a good luck call from Nicole Kidman. The guy didn't pick up at first: True story! [People]
• Theyyyyy're here! Poltergeist remake, in the works. Stay away from the light, Carole Anne! [Variety]
• Leona Lewis, Mariah Carey, Beyoncé, Miley Cyrus and Rihanna have teamed up for a charity track, "Just Stand Up." There will be a Just Stand Up To Cancer TV special on September 5; the song should hit iTunes a few days earlier. [The Sun]
• Apparently Sir Bob Geldof has been dealing with the stress from daughter Peaches' antics by going dancing. Sometimes what they call "gossip" isn't. [The Sun]
• A sneak peek of Sanjaya's Nationwide Mutual Insurance commercial, in which he has lots of different hairstyles. [People]
• Luke Wilson might be dating a Yale-educated lawyer named Meg Simpson. Stay Tuned. [Village Voice]
• James Hetfield of Metallica erected a fence on his California property which blocks access to a fire road used by hikers and equestrians. Kill 'em all! [UPI]
• Jessica Simpson is doing beer ads for Dallas' Stampede Brewing Co. Classy. [Yahoo News]
• Spotted: Al Pacino wearing blue nail polish. [Mirror]
• Paris Hilton is taking that crappy best friend show idea to London. Sorry, Brits! [Guardian]
• A leading Italian medial group doesn't want ER or Grey's Anatomy to air on Italian television: "These programs are teaching viewers inaccurate views on medicine," says Annalisa Silvestro, president of the National Federation of Medical College. "They are spreading misinformation." It's called entertainment, no? [Yahoo News]
• Roger Moore has a book coming out in November; a memoir called My Word Is Bond. He recalls crashing a boat while filming Live And Let Die, cracking his front teeth and twisting his knee. "There I was, as a fearless 007, hobbling on a cane to my boat and then pretending to be indestructible for the cameras. Who says I can't act?" [AP]
• Pete Doherty's band is banned from the Moonfest festival in Westbury, Wiltshire, next week. The police say: "We carried out an analysis of what Pete Doherty and his band does. What he does as part of his routine is to gee up the crowd. They speed up and then slow down the music and create a whirlpool effect in the crowd. They [the crowd] all get geed up and then they start fighting." Um, ok. [Guardian]
• Gossip straight outta 1992: Kurt Cobain vs. Axl Rose; Stephanie Seymour vs. Courtney Love. [Rush & Molloy]
• Headline of the day: "I Want An IVF Baby With My Fifth Husband After I've Posed For Playboy, Says Surgically Remodelled Brigitte Nielsen." [This Is London]
• Gary Glitter was supposed to be deported to the UK, but he conveniently collapsed in a Thai airport hotel room complaining about his heart. [Guardian]
• "It's very difficult to be a career person and have a relationship. I didn't succeed at doing it at all. It's incredibly hard… I empowered myself by not staying in the thing with Russell [Crowe]. I felt it was going to be repeating some similar patterns that I'd just gotten out of and it was a drag because I was crazy about him." — Meg Ryan. [Daily Mail]
• "It was my first nude scene and it wasn’t supposed to be me. I had a body double and we had some complicating factors with her. It was sort of a last minute thing, where I said, 'I’ll just go ahead and do this.' I was really uncomfortable. This crew that I’d been working with, that knows me when I put on my producer hat, suddenly sees me naked. It was really humiliating." — Anna Faris, on The House Bunny. [ONTD]
• "It's fatal when actresses use Botox. I remember seeing Cold Mountain, and it really looked to me like Nicole Kidman had been using it. Her face was neither sad nor glad — nor anything, she was just like a painted doll. I thought: 'Why would she do that?'" — Britt Ekland, the Bond girl once married to Peter Sellers. [Page Six]

[Los Angeles, August 4. Images via INFDaily.]

Why, it's 90210's Kelly Taylor. "Born to a cokehead mom and an absentee dad, Kelly, in no particular order, lost her virginity via date rape, ODed on diet pills, was badly burned in a house fire, joined a cult, dated a cokehead, became an addict, was single-white-femaled, miscarried, got shot by carjackers, developed amnesia, was sexually harassed by a member of the medical profession, was attacked and raped in an alley, eventually killed her rapist in revenge, and lived through dozens of other comparatively piddling traumas." And Kel's reaction to these unfortunate incidents was always meek acceptance.

An exception to the rule is Buffy, but as we all know, Buffy existed in a supernatural universe. The ladies of Lost are similarly kick ass, but again: they live in a fractured world, not one that is striving for realism. Are there female characters out there taking names who exist in semi-realistic settings? Glenn Close on Damages comes to mind; so does Mariska Hartigay on Law and Order SVU. What other characters are avoiding victimhood successfully (and no, hookers and doormats don't count).

Heigl Says No Thanks, Emmy, It's Undeserved [AP]
The Beautiful And The Damned: From Kelly Taylor To Meredith Grey, The Long-suffering Ladies Of Prime-time TV [Radar]