The Gap Reports Worst Sales In The History Of Ever

  • The Gap will just not cease to exist, releasing new monthly sales figures even as no one acknowledges it anymore. How do you get an 18% decrease from March 2007 when the last known Gap shopper bought her last Macau-made $4.90 tank top in 2003? The Gap will manage to report disappointing sales long after liquidation.
  • » 4/11/08 12:30pm 4/11/08 12:30pm

Dear New CEO Of The Gap: A Few Tips From People Who Wear Clothes

Dear new Gap CEO Glenn Murphy,
Happy first day on the job! Soooo, your company's a piece of shit, and the industry seems reeeeallly confident in your ability to turn things around. NOT! To quote the New York Post's "insider" (we're sure she didn't mean to misspell your name!) you don't know an "armhole from a sock."… » 7/27/07 1:30pm 7/27/07 1:30pm