• Heidi Montag's Playboy shoot: Not that X-Rated. Sources say the mag had strict instructions when photographing her:

"No nipples, no vagina, no ass." Guess that's where she keeps her good Christian values? [TMZ]

• Madonna has signed on to appear as a mentor in the new season of UK reality show X Factor. Also guest starring: Robbie Williams, Whitney Houston and Rihanna. [Telegraph]
• Kate Hudson is dating Alex Rodriguez and Friday Night Lights actress Minka Kelly is dating A-Rod rival Derek Jeter. Word is: "Things between the two photogenic actresses are frostier than the new stadium's $9 beer." [Page Six]
• Mary-Kate and Ashley: Double-dating, chain smoking, tickling. [Page Six]
• Seth MacFarlane says Family Guy's Stewie is gay. "We had an episode that went all the way to the script phase in which Stewie does come out. It had to do with the harassment he took from other kids at school. He ends up going back in time to prevent a passage in Leviticus from being written: 'Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with womankind. It is an abomination.' But we decided it's better to keep it vague, which makes more sense because he's a 1-year-old. Ultimately, Stewie will be gay or a very unhappy repressed heterosexual. It also explains why he's so hellbent on killing [his mother, Lois] and taking over the world: He has a lot of aggression, which comes from confusion and uncertainty about his orientation." [Gatecrasher]
• When Kourtney Kardashian says she is "so shocked" by her pregnancy, you've got to wonder what she means: She knows how to get knocked up, right? Anyways, she says: We were in the Everglades and I kept feeling nauseous and sick. I just kept thinking something wasn't right. I went to the doctor and he confirmed the news. I was just so shocked." Kourtney has not revealed who impregnated her, but in the past she was linked to skateboarder Scott Disick, whose website notes: "As for girls, he was known as being able to manipulate them into anything." [People]
• Anna Faris and Chris Pratt: Married. And it happened it Bali on July 9. As you'll recall, they were seen on what was thought to be a wedding trip in Hawaii in late July, then her rep said it wasn't true that they'd gotten hitched in Hawaii. Which wasn't exactly a lie. [People]
• Kate Gosselin on Jon Gosselin's relationship(s): "It is hurtful. Very hurtful. To be very honest, the most hurtful part is when his decisions directly affect our children. That's the hardest part for me." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Michael Jackson's "Will You Be There" will be remade with John Mayer, Lionel Richie, Whitney Houston, Usher, Dionne Warwick, Wyclef and Jermaine Jackson. Larry King's wife Shawn is spearheading the tribute, which will either be awesome or awful. [TMZ]
• …And Shawn King has just pulled out of a duet with Jermaine Jackson she was supposed to do in Vienna. [Page Six]
• Jennie Garth basically confirms that Robert Pattinson is dating Kristen Stewart by saying, "I can't say [which New Moon costar] …but he is dating one of them!" Oh man, it's Buff Werewolf, isn't it? Remember when they held hands? [Gatecrasher]
• "David Beckham disappoints Chelsea and Tottenham by insisting AC Milan is most likely destination for England star." [Daily Mail]
• "Beckhams set to swap LA for Italy?" [Mirror]
• Is Denzel Washington — like so many other Hollywood types — looking to make a living in TV? He's considering an executive producer role on a cop drama called Billy Stiles, written by Virgil Williams, who has penned scripts for 24 and ER. [Reuters]
• Kendra Wilkinson and Hank Baskett: Expecting a boy.
  "Whether this little guy is a jock or not, he's definitely going to be a mama's boy," Kendra says. "And there's no doubt he's gonna be a handsome one … just look at his dad!" [People]
• Rebecca Romijn is giving husband Jerry O'Connell diaper duty while she works on new show Eastwick. This column calls him Mr. Mom, but shouldn't it just be "Dad"? [People]
• Glenn Close used to be in Up With People?!?!? [Page Six]
• Michael Douglas has released a statement regarding his son, Cameron, being busted for meth and thrown in jail for heroin: "The family is devastated and very disappointed in Cameron's recent behavior. Any family who has dealt with substance abuse knows how devastating it can be." [People, NY Daily News]
• "A New York City judge says a jury can decide whether the author of a best-selling book about the death of Playboy playmate Anna Nicole Smith defamed her lawyer by calling him a pimp." [USA Today]
• "Anna Nicole Smith pal Howard K. Stern wins OK to sue writer for libel over gay sex video tale" [NY Daily News]
• Mickey Rourke is not impressed when you "make it rain" in the club. [Page Six]
• "Jon Hamm and Jennifer Westfeldt are ready to take on Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell for the title of Longest Dating (and Unmarried) Couple." [Gatecrasher]
• Acting legend Charles Dance, whom you may have seen in Gosford Park, says Paris Hilton's British Best Friend series is "a show for airheads, starring an airhead." Her show is bumping his university drama, Trinity. [The Sun]
• Paul Giamatti will replace Sean Penn as Larry in the Three Stooges movie. Benecio Del Toro will play Moe, and Curly has yet to be cast. [NY Daily News]
• Kim Basinger may play Zac Efron's mom in The Death and Life of Charlie St. Cloud, a flick about a grieving family. [Variety]
• Bachelorette Jillian Harris stands by Ed Swiderski, but other continue to women talk about how shady he is, blah blah blah. [MSNBC]
• Blind item! "Which scorned reality star is in talks with a major R&B singer to have a faux relationship - just to improve her image?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Today some people in traffic tried to sell me a baby. A live human baby. I didn't know what to say. I said a little prayer for the kid. Wow. It all happend so fast. I was trying to figure out if they were serious, and i think when my reaction was not a good one, they just took off. I mean look. Chances are they were joking. The scary part is i really couldn't tell. Maybe i'm just one gullable fool (sic)." — Joel Madden, via Twitter. [News.com.au]
• "Ran into the people that tried to sell me their baby today on melrose.Told me to tell you all they were joking. I thought 10k was a bit high." — Joel Madden. [Twitter]
• "I learned 30 pages of dialogue in German and English and went to the audition dressed like the character. I killed it. I did everything except sleep with the director to get that part" — Diane Kruger, to Playboy on landing her role in Inglourious Basterds. [Page Six]
• "I got stuck being searched in Toronto, and she waited for me. I totally wasn't expecting to see her when I got through my Toronto search, and she was there, patiently waiting. Some people wouldn't have waited. That's all I'm saying." —Eric Bana on The Time Traveler's Wife costar Rachel McAdams. [USA Today]
• "What was I gonna do? I was worried about you. What if you'd been sent to jail or something and I had to alert the studio?" — Rachel McAdams to Eric Bana. [USA Today]
• "You know, in the old days it was very difficult to make movies 'cause you had to have 35 millimeter cameras, which were phenomenally expensive. Or you had to have rich parents that could send you to film school. Nowadays, anybody, any kid or young person with a desire to make films ... (has) access to this equipment. You have great video cameras and the quality's fantastic. You can make soundtracks and do visual effects. You can do very competent computer effects quite easily. There are no excuses anymore. If people really want to make movies, they can go out and do it. And I think we're going see in the next 20 or 30 years a real influx of creativity to the world of entertainment because I believe a lot in the young generation coming along ... the pop culture generation who now can grab these cameras and go make films with them." — director Peter Jackson. [Reuters]
• "I definitely got doughy. I started eating like crazy and drinking dark beer. Between meals on set, I'd eat a No. 1 Value Meal at McDonald's and then Doritos on top of it. It was absolute heaven." — Matt Damon, on gaining weight for his role in The Informant. [Gatecrasher]

• Lindsay Lohan is on the cover of Elle UK — the shoot where jewelry went missing! — and here's what Editor-in-Chief Lorraine Candy writes in her Editor's letter:

"Lindsay Lohan wrote me a note during this month's cover shoot. It read, 'Let's do it again some time.' I've put it on my office wall because, in all honesty, I don't know if I could. This was the most unpredictable, and confusing cover shoot in my magazine career. First, Lindsay was about to arrive. Then she was in Paris. She was almost on set, then she disappeared into her hotel room. She was ready for her interview, then she had to have a fake tan! But we got there. And what we got was amazing. This shoot is truly original, just like Ms Lohan herself. In the end, she did her job brilliantly and, I hope you'll agree, so did we." Here's video from behind-the-scenes at the shoot [Elle TV]

• Chris Brown will be sentenced on Wednesday and appear on Larry King Live afterward: He'll apologize for assaulting Rihanna on TV. [Radar Online]
• Was Chris Brown forcibly removed from an upscale bowling alley in NYC last week for "partying too much"? [Fox 411]
• Take note: Tom Cruise is David and Victoria Beckham's "relationship guru." [Daily Express]
• "David Beckham is to star alongside Arnold Schwarzenegger in TV ads promoting California to tourists." [The Sun]
• Ryan O'Neal says of Farrah Fawcett's funeral: "I had just put the casket in the hearse and I was watching it drive away when a beautiful blonde woman comes up and embraces me. I said to her, 'You have a drink on you? You have a car?' She replied, 'Daddy, it's me - Tatum!' I was just trying to be funny with a strange Swedish woman, and it's my daughter. It's so sick." Tatum O'Neal says: "That's our relationship in a nutshell. You make of it what you will." [The Sun]
• Vanity Fair produced two different covers for its September issue: Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett. These deaths bumped a scheduled Mad Men cover, so now the actors from the show will be inside. Boo. [WWD]
• This paper spoke with the grandmother of the Samantha Burke, woman that Jude Law got pregnant. Delores Burke, 80, says: "What I want to know is how a girl gets pregnant in this day and age? Yes, it takes two people but he is the older and wiser man and he should have made sure nothing like this happened. I'm mad at him, we all are. He has other children. Didn't he think about how his actions would affect them?" [Daily Mail]
• "Samantha, her mom, and her family can affirm that Jude has been responsive and supportive throughout the relationship and pregnancy, and know that he will remain so as a father once Baby Sophia is born." [People]
• Video of Samantha Burke talking to the media at the link. TMZ]
• Apparently Samantha barely had any boyfriends, hence the headline: Prude Until Jude. [The Sun]
• A source says: "Jude sleeps with so many different women. A lot of names were going around as to who the mother of his baby could be." [Page Six]
• Jude's ex, Sadie Frost, is the oldest of 10 half brothers and sisters and mother of four kids from two marriages, so she's "understanding" and wants her kids with Jude to meet the new child. [Mirror]
• Jude Law allegedly told Sadie Frost that he only slept with Samantha Burke once, after a drunken party. [Daily Mail]
• Jessica Biel sings! She's playing Sarah Brown in Guys and Dolls at the Hollywood Bowl, and says she would love to to go Broadway: "That is one of my eight-year-old dreams. That's like my little eight-year-old inside me is cartwheeling around, thinking about that idea." [AP]
• Mariah Carey's new CD will have ads. Actually, the CD booklet will be a 34-page mini magazine in co-production with Elle… with ads from Elizabeth Arden, Angel Champagne, Carmen Steffens, Le Métier de Beauté and the Bahamas Board of Tourism. [BrandWeek]
• Paris Hilton's estranged manager Jason Moore is hopping a book about how he molded this blond piece of clay into a global icon." [Rush & Molloy]
• Dr. Conrad Murray was getting $150,000 a month to be Michael Jackson's personal physician. But many of his previous patients were low-income. "There are many, many patients that thank God this man was here for them," says one. One patient said Murray performed angioplasty on him three years ago without ever being guaranteed he would be paid. [CNN]
• If you have $30 million or so, you can big on the Andy Warhol portrait of Michael Jackson, going up for auction soon. [BBC News]
• Jon & Kate Plus 8 will not become Jon & Kate Plus Dates. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Leslie Mann says her husband Judd Apatow gives her anecdotes to tell while she's promoting new film Funny People: "He has trained me to be ultra-prepared, to have five stories ready to go. He gives what I say a beginning, a middle, and an end. Whereas I'd just barf it out," she says. "It's really lazy of me to depend on him to make me sound sensible, but so what? I'm lazy." [The New Yorker]
• Milla Jovovich: Getting hitched for the third time; filmmaker Paul W.S. Anderson is her fiancé. [Daily Mail]
• Tilda Swinton and 40 other people are pulling a film screen through the Scottish Highlands "on an eight and a half day odyssey through the mountains, camping each night in a different village." [Guardian]
• In this interview, Diane Kruger says she is a "country girl" and "definitely not sophisticated." The reporter writes: "What utter hogwash! Kruger spent most of her childhood summers on a scholarship to the Royal Ballet School in London, then five years as a top-drawer international model, based in Paris, before becoming a film actress." [Times of London]
• Liev Schreiber says kids make you youthful: "I'm older physically, but spiritually much younger." [People]
• Kate Middleton, aka Prince William's girlfriend, has had a series of meetings with Sir Richard Branson, in an effort to "sharpen her business acumen." [Daily Mail]
• Editors at British magazine Pride are apologizing for manipulating comments made by Nia Long, which made it seem like she was ranting about Beyoncé's acting skills. [Daily Express]
• Liza Minnelli will not be on Ugly Betty, but she will be on Drop Dead Diva. [AP]
• Whoops! Emile Hirsch and an Emile Hirsch impostor both attended the same party. [Page Six]
• Eric Bana is hot and talking about his attraction to cars. [Daily Mail]
• Sienna Miller on GI Joe: "If these films are well done I can find them quite entertaining. But…I prefer indie, arty films really. It's not the kind of film I'd normally go and see." [Guardian]
• In addition, Sienna's GI Joe wig cost cost £4,800. [Telegraph]
• Carey Hart says he and Pink are going to have a baby… Eventually. "She still has another 18 months of touring, and I'm pretty heavy in competing again in all my businesses, so it's definitely going to happen, but just not anytime soon." [E!]
• Q: A character with special needs or a prostitute-those are usually the two paths to Oscar. Had you considered that? Hugh Dancy: "I genuinely didn't. But now that you've said that, if it doesn't work out for me with Adam, I'll play a hooker next. There was the worry that if we didn't pull this off, I would look doubly exposed. Like, 'Really? You thought that was going to work? Better luck next time! There's this great prostitute movie coming out-maybe you should give that a shot.'" [BlackBook]
• Kevin Costner and his band were set to perform in Canada when suddenly the stage collapsed. One person died and at least 60 people were injured, including 2 members of Costner's band. [TMZ]
• Funny interview with Michael Ian Black and Michael Showalter, at the link. [BlackBook]
• Sheree from The Real Housewives Of Atlanta seems psyched that she was the number one trending topic on Twitter last week after her "Who's gonna check me, boo?" argument. She says: "You don't want to be on the wrong side of Sheree. You really don't. I tell them all the time, 'Don't let the cute face fool you!'" [E!]
• He's done Ali G, Borat and Brüno.What will Sacha Baron Cohen do next? How about a Eurovision music mockumentary? [The Sun]
• Kathleen Turner spills about living the last 17 years with the pain of rheumatoid arthritis, taking steroids which made her puffy and bloated and then turning to vodka to kill the pain — and becoming a drunk. [Daily Mail]
• Omarosa will be on TV One in a new series called Life After. [WaPo]
• "In Cold Souls, opening Friday in limited release, the actor Paul Giamatti plays an actor named…Paul Giamatti." [LA Times]
  
• Billy Joel is "distraught" over his breakup with Katie Lee Joel and "obsessed" with getting her back. [Page Six]
• People you may or may not have hear of had a kid: "Survivor & Amazing Race's Rob and Amber Become Parents." [People]
• Hollywood is out of ideas, part MCDXLIV: Steven Spielberg will direct a remake of Harvey, about a man and his friendship with an invisible six-foot tall rabbit. The original flick was released in 1950 and starred James Stewart. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Will Ferrell has left the film project Neighborhood Watch. [Variety]
• Dustin "Screech"Diamond: purposely excluded from the Saved By The Bell reunion by his castmates. [NY Daily News]
• Whatshername will celebrate her divorce with a televised "party extravaganza." [The Sun]
• Whatshername is on "yet another" holiday, and her cagefighter boyfriend is with her. [Daily Mail]
• Whatshisname has been crying himself to sleep and wishes he were stronger. [Mirror]
• "They did try to submit in the comedy category in the '90s and suffered from doing it in an era of juggernaut comedies like Friends and Seinfeld and Cheers and whatnot. And The Simpsons was as well written, if not more so, as any of those — but suffered from the prejudice against the medium. So I think perhaps in reparation for that, they should give them an honorary achievement Emmy." — Seth MacFarlane. [LA Times]
• "At 21 I married Luc Besson and we bought a beautiful 13-room chateau in Normandy. I was totally happy, drinking wine, walking in the forests and riding horses in the beautiful farmland. It didn't work because he was so much older. I was young and staying up late, playing the guitar and hanging out with my friends. He was the early riser who went to sleep early. He expected me to be the perfect wife, which was natural - the hostess entertaining his friends. But I was like, 'Aaaargh! I don't even like those people.' It's too bad it didn't work because he was an incredible person and I was an incredible girl, but the timing wasn't right." — Milla Jovovich. [Daily Mail]
• "I think Hillary Clinton is one of the most amazing women of this time. I don't know her and I don't know — should I call her? I'm sure she's busy. But I know they know this movie's being made. And I just want to call and say: Do you have any thoughts or feelings I should be aware of? Of course I can't make that call. I feel like saying, 'I'm going to play you in this movie and I have a lot of respect for you and is there anything you want me to say?'" — Hope Davis. [LA Times]
• "Whatever I say, I get myself into trouble." — Sienna Miller. [Guardian]
• "When I'm not working, I feel like a Ferrari in the garage. You have all this potential and you just want to break out." — Glenn Close. [LA Times]
• "I would talk my wacky language to him and he'd interpret it to the drummer. I'd say, 'I want it to sound like Zeus woke up from a nap and he's pissed and there's an opening in the clouds and he starts handing out lightning bolts,' which is crazy, but that's how I hear the rhythm. And Omar, he whispers some things to the drummer, and that's exactly what it sounds like. It really encouraged the songwriter within me." — Juliette Lewis, on recording her band's new album, produced by The Mars Volta's Omar Rodriguez-Lopez. [Reuters]
• "I have a theory that people feel as attractive as they did as a child. I was a really hideous child. People who were attractive as children have a sense of entitlement. I have a sense of awkwardness." — Kate Beckinsale. [Times of London]
• "Troy launched me but it launched me as the face that launched a thousand ships and not as an actress. I want roles where I have to expose my soul." — Diane Kruger. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "I have never come across a female character that is written with Blanche's level of complexity, in that she's vulnerable, she's pathetic, she's a monster, she's nasty, she's tender, she's kind – she's so many things that you never know quite what she's going to do next. I've never come across so rich a character before." — Rachel Weisz on being in A Streetcar Named Desire in London. [Telegraph]
• "My life has gotten more surreal in stair steps. from the blog to the book to the movie to 'Oh my God, Nora Ephron's directing it! Oh my God, Meryl Streep's in it!' So right now I'm at this sort of surreal-is-the-new-normal phase. I'm cool with it." — Julie Powell, whose blog became the movie Julie & Julia. [NY Daily News]
• "I'm so not the relationship go-to girl. But I'm much clearer about what a relationship is, which is why I will never marry again. Gabriel and I have a great partnership and a lovely daughter. But I once was stupid enough to say, in a previous relationship, 'I'm going to be with this person for ever,' and realized, as I grew, that I don't know if for ever is possible. Gabriel and I don't look at our relationship in terms of for ever, we look at it as right here today. And today means being the best people we can be, the best parents we can be. It's wonderful, but neither one of us feels the need to attach ourselves to each other for life – because it may not be that." — Halle Berry. [Daily Mail]
• "I hate alcoholics and AA. If you can't drink responsibly, don't drink at all. Don't go to meetings, whine about your character flaws and blame the fact that you are a sociopath on booze" — Roseanne Barr to Heeb. [Page Six]

The Good: Renee Rockefeller demonstrates classic socialite-at-benefit chic, which, after all, has its place.


The Good: Harper's Bazaar editor Glenda Bailey's boldly individual awesomeness knows no bounds. Maybe we all appreciate her even more after that Wintour interview?


The Good: Dionne Warwick says: "Don't Make Me Over." We say: "okay."


The Good: Truth to power, the proportions of Glenn's jacket gave me momentary pause. But overall, this is such a good look for her! Elegant and fun!


The Good: Gillian Miniter also obviously has a closet full of benefit-worthy socialite togs, and can produce what Barbara Pym would call "exactly the right touch of dowdy elegance" at will.


What Say You about DJ Cassidy (a noted fop and dandy)'s take on Wasp togs? Specifically, the somewhat ironic footwear?


There's a lot to love about Estelle's frock, but what Say You about the fit?

[Images via Getty]

Apparently she has been notifying friends that she is with child. And her boyfriend, Jamie Hince, was overheard telling her to "calm down, especially in your state." [News Of The World]

• This report claims that at a recent shoot for Roberto Cavalli, Kate Moss showed up late and then "proceeded to finish off beer after beer after beer while she was getting her make-up done." Maybe not pregnant? [Page Six]
• Not pregnant: Angelina Jolie. [Gatecrasher]
• In case you missed it, Chris Brown issued a statement yesterday which read: "Words cannot begin to express how sorry and saddened I am over what transpired… I am seeking the counseling of my pastor, my mother and other loved ones. I am committed, with God's help, to emerging a better person." And! "Much of what has been speculated or reported on blogs and/or reported in the media is wrong. While I would like to be able to talk about this more, until the legal issues are resolved, this is all I can say." [NY Daily News]
• Salma Hayek married her baby daddy, French businessman Francois-Henri Pinault. On Valentine's Day. There were reports that they'd called off their engagement, but the nuptials were announced in a paper his company owns. (He is worth about $16.9 billion.) Congrats! [People]
• Lindsay Lohan and Sam Ronson had a fight on the streets of New York on Valentine's Day! Lindsay called Sam by her full name ("Samantha Judith Ronson, why are you doing this to me?") and Sam mumbled something which made LL say, ""What are you talking about? I've been with you all night!" This "first hand account" of the spat comes to you from journalist Justin Rocket Silverman and a paparazzo. [NY Post]
• In this video, Project Runway's Christian Siriano says that Rihanna "must have done something" to provoke Chris Brown to hit her. Then he recants, "No, you should never hit a woman." But! He does say that Rihanna is "kind of a diva." [TMZ]
• It's a boy for M.I.A. and fiancé Ben Bronfman; she announced that her baby is "healthy, fine and beautiful" on her MySpace page. [AP]
• Speaking of babies: The company that did public relations for Nadya Suleman, the mother of octuplets, has quit. Death threats are to blame. [MSNBC via AP]
• Hugh Jackman will be hosting the Oscars, and he hopes that fellow Australian Heath Ledger wins Best Supporting Actor. "I can't hide the fact that I would really love for that honour to be bestowed upon him. It would be fitting and I think he deserves it." [Mirror]
• Is the "truce" between Madonna and Guy Ritchie over? This report claims that Ritchie isn't happy about the custody arrangement and wants the boys in British schools instead of New York establishments. [Daily Mail]
• Hmm, this says that Madonna and Guy are looking to make their current custody arrangement legally binding. [The Star]
• Meanwhile: Madonna took new man Jesus to a Kabbalah meeting on Valentine's Day. Her son David and daughter Lourdes also attended; Madonna and Jesus left separately, possibly to avoid being photographed together. [Daily Mail]
• And! Will Madonna play Wallis Simpson, the American Woman who caused Edward VIII to turn down the throne? [Guardian]
• Jennifer Lopez interrupted her husband's concert by walking on stage with with twins, Max and Emme. Max was wearing a tuxedo and Emme was wearing a pink gown; they turn one this Sunday. [Daily Mail, Just Jared]
• Miley Cyrus's label spent £150,000 flying her to the UK to sing on a Saturday night variety show, only to have Miley forget the words to her own damn song. [The Sun]
• Love's in need of love today: The White House is planning a concert to honor Stevie Wonder, and Barack and Michelle Obama will present the singer with a Library of Congress award on Wednesday. [The Star]
• Amy Winehouse was in the hospital in St. Lucia, but has been released. Too much fun in the sun? [TMZ]
• Has newly engaged Mandy Moore gone totally domestic? She's the new spokesperson for Gain detergent. The campaign is called "Love At First Sniff." Not a joke. [AdAge]
• Beyoncé and Muhammad Ali embraced for pictures at the NBA All-Star game over the weekend. [Daily Mail]
• Fashion week gossip: Diana Ross was in the house at the Diane von Furstenberg show. [WWD]
• Kanye West attended a few Fashion Week shows over the weekend and was moody. [Gatecrasher]
• Benicio Del Toro will walk in the G-Star fashion show on Thursday. Chances are, he will scowl. [Page Six]
• Jessica Simpson threw a party at brother in law Pete Wentz's bar last week, and Tony Romo bought the room a round of shots. [Gatecrasher]
• Conan O'Brien is packing up his office in preparations to replace Jay Leno as the Tonight Show host; he says: "Men don't like to say goodbye. My wife told me about six months ago: 'I think you have to admit that you have mixed feelings about leaving this late-night show, it's very emotionally charged for you. That's OK.'" [AP]
• Lily Allen's apartment is super organized: In her walk-in wardrobe, every pair of shoes is boxed and has a Polaroid of the contents stuck on the outside; in her kitchen cupboards and in the spice rack, all the labels face the front. "This is what I'm really all about," she says. "It's control. I have to be in control. Even when I'm out of control I'm still sort of in control. I know the point I'm going off the rails. But it's my decision to go off them." [Daily Mail]
• Here are pictures of Peaches Geldof, 19, showing off her "bizarre" tattoos as she sunbathes topless while on vacay in South America. Note: They aren't that bizarre. [Daily Mail]
• Freida Pinto called off her engagement to her boyfriend of four years after Slumdog Millionaire started taking off; she is now single and ready to mingle… at the Oscars. [Mirror]
• Katy Perry and Benji Madden: It's on! They were each other's dates on Valentine's day in Las Vegas. [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which celeb chef's wife mans his reservation stand while he secretly slips out the back door with his girlfriend?" [Gatecrasher]
• Doug Reinhardt and Paris Hilton spent V-Day together; he gave her an Andy Warhol print of Marilyn Monroe. What do you think she gave him? [Yahoo News via E!]
• Salman Rushdie's new girlfriend is a "32-year-old actress of Amazonian proportions." Read: Tall. She says: "I think he is a genius, genius novelist and he thinks I am smart and that's the biggest thing, the aphrodisiac. With other men, I have had to hide that side of myself because I felt if I came off too smart, I'd be ostracised. This is a good old-fashioned romance but the attraction started as a meeting of minds." [Daily Mail]
• Jennifer Love Hewitt hints about the new season of the Ghost Whisperer: "There's lots going on. I think the audience will be very, very happy. There's an unexpected reunion and there's maybe the pitter-patter of tiny feet." [E!]
• A man suspected of stalking Celine Dion was arrested outside the gates of her home on Friday. [CTV]
• Johnny Knoxville's new show, Nitro Circus, is responsible for a bunch of injuries: "We've shot 12 episodes and there's been about that many surgeries... There was three of the guys who went to the hospital in one day," says Johnny. One 60-year-old "jumped off the back of a boat, going 60 (miles per hour) and it went bad... It broke his pelvis and cut his urethra." [Daily Express]
• Farrah Fawcett is suing companies who have used the iconic photo of her in a red swimsuit without permission. [Daily Mail]
• Is Steven Cojocaru about to get kicked off of Entertainment Tonight? [Page Six]
• American Idol's Ruben Studdard says he overcame stage fright at the age of 12, if you care. [The Star]
• Michael Jackson's brother Marlon is involved in a plan to develop a billion-dollar slavery memorial and luxury resort in Nigeria. Yes. Slavery tourism. [BBC News]
• Kenneth Branagh was not nominated for an Olivier award, but was named best actor in the only stage awards decided entirely by the public. [Guardian]
• "Three of my very best girlfriends flew into town and wanted to meet Brad Pitt. So I was like, 'Brad, come over. My girlfriends are going crazy over you.' He comes over, and he's so cool. He has a way of being very warm and making people feel welcome." — Taraji P. Henson of Benjamin Button. [USA Today]
• "On the first day I was really nervous, because I felt like I was walking on someone's set, and it was no longer my set. But I found Donna inside [me]. Donna's still there! Seeing Jennie [Garth] again and all of a sudden we were two giggly school girls." — Tori Spelling, on returning to 90210. [People]
• "Wow, [in] 10 yrs I'll be 24, almost 25... I hope to still be acting, I really do. I hope to have gone to college and be enjoying my life… I kind of follow my own path and don't really look at others... I have my close family, my close friends and the people that I've worked with that are always there for me, and you have to just kind of stick to yourself." — Dakota Fanning, when asked to predict her future. [The Star]
• "I remember the instant I fell in love with her. One night on board a small boat I owned, she looked at me with love, her dark brown eyes lit by a table lantern. That moment changed my life. […] I never saw Natalie dead - not at the morgue, nor at the funeral home. I wanted to remember her alive. After the funeral I went to bed and stayed there for seven, maybe eight, days. […] Did I blame myself? If I'd been there, I could have done something. I wasn't, but ultimately, a man is responsible for his loved one. Yes, I blamed myself." — Robert Wagner, on the death of Natalie Wood. [Daily Mail]
• "Parents should say, 'Drugs might seem fun, but they do funny things to your brain. Some people react to it good, some don't. Try it and see what you think.' The only story is that drugs are bad and they will kill you — you will become a prostitute, a rapist or a dealer. But that's not true. I know lots of people that take cocaine three nights a week and get up and go to work everyday, no problem at all. But we never hear that side of the story. I have no statement to make, I just wish people wouldn't sensationalise this thing that just exists." — Lily Allen. [Daily Mail]
• "I think Simon [Cowell] has actually got a wee bit nicer over the past couple of years. He's always been pretty nice to me and I think it's really good that somebody will give you a dose of reality even if it might be said in a harsh manner… As soon as I took a step back and realized that everything he said was constructive, as mean as it might be, we got along fine. So if anybody asks me who my favourite judge is, I'm always going to say Simon." — Carrie Underwood. [The Star]
• "She might not be a feminist, but Lily Allen is that rare thing: a star who offers the usually unspoken female perspective on relationships, in songs with which women can identify intuitively." — From a review of Lily Allen's new CD. [Independent]
• "I've only ever played one truly evil character, Cruella De Vil in 101 Dalmatians, and she really was the devil. But that was high comedy. The meaner she got, the more the audience laughed. But to play someone who is always considered mean and manipulative? It's boring. And I don't do it. What's more interesting is playing characters with light and shade. The problem is that some people don't want to see female characters with light and shade. They want us black and white, easily put into boxes. Good. Evil. All that stuff… I read a survey which said that both men and women find very aggressive women who are sure of themselves the most difficult to relate to. Certainly, when a woman is in power, the more feminine and conciliatory she can be, the more people will open up to her. So a woman who is acting like a man gets negative reactions from both sexes." — Glenn Close. [Daily Mail]
• "I did this photo shoot with a big name fashion photographer and he said, 'Just so you know, if you don't like anything about yourself I can fix it afterwards — like that, for example' — pointing to my face. I was like, 'My chin? ' 'Yes, that cleft on your chin, ' he said, to which I replied, 'I wouldn't mind keeping it, as it's part of my face, you know.'" — Emily Blunt. [Daily Express]

• Noooooo! Grazia reports Olivier Theyskens is leaving Nina Ricci. [The Cut]
• Or not: the mag attributes the scoop to "buzz currently sweeping through the front rows of the Couture shows in Paris." [Fashionista]

• Los Angeles jeweler and creator of the worst ad ever Loree Rodkin is enjoying a bump in sales following Michelle Obama's decision to wear a number of Rodkin's pieces. Like Jason Wu, she won't recreate the exact jewelery, since it was all custom-designed, but she will make similar items available for public sale. For $20,000-$50,000. [WSJ]
• ONTD has what they claim are leaked David Alexander sketches of costumes for Britney Spears' upcoming tour; if these are legit, expect our girl to look a little like Barbarella when she takes the stage. [ONTD]
• One thing that hasn't changed in the recession: the purpose of the couture shows is still not to much to actually sell a large number of $80,000 hand-made dresses but to maintain a brand identity fantasmagorical enough to shift gallons of perfume, acres of accessories, and counters of cosmetics. Attendance at the Paris shows hasn't dropped, and Chanel and Dior's couture divisions are expecting modest growth. (Further proof those wealthy enough to buy couture are very far removed from current economic realities.) [Portfolio]
• That seems to be the customer Tom Ford is seeking as he releases a $990 jean. The button is gold-plated. [The Cut]
• There for us at the other end of the denim market is Stacey London, of What Not To Wear fame. She's going to shill for Lee, because Riders "fit great and make you look slimmer." We'll take 'em 'cause they cost less than $20. [Brandweek]
• Never to be outdone, Hermès is releasing a $24,000 folding chair. It's made of black crocodile and nickel. [Racked]
• Beth Ditto is going to design an 80s-inspired fashion line with the British plus sized brand Evans. They're only in Britain and Northern Ireland, and there's no word on potential US distribution. Maybe Barney's will pick it up, like Kate Moss for Topshop? [Blackbook]
• Amanda Seyfried has become a face of Movado. [WWD]
• Eddie Bauer is being sued by outdoor clothier Woolrich. They say Eddie Bauer's slogan "The Original Outdoor Outfitter," is too much like Woolrich's, "The Original Outdoor Clothing Company." No argument there, but hasn't that been Eddie Bauer's slogan for eons? Did Woolrich just notice? [AP]
• Multinational giant Unilever, owner of the brands Dove, Axe, as well as skin-bleaching cream Fair & Lovely, is buying the TIGI hair product line and its hair-care schools from Toni & Guy. I just learned Unilever also owns Ben & Jerry's, so next time before I get high and mighty about an Axe ad, I'll try and remember how much I love Cherry Garcia. The world being nuanced and all. (But, ugh, Fair & Lovely?!) [WSJ]
• Time "investigates" the Anna Wintour retirement/replacement story, talks down to Page Six and the online sources that initially broke the rumors, and then rehashes everything you read here and elsewhere six weeks ago. MSM FTW! [Time]
• Glenn Close must have read that article in February's Glamour about "shopping your closet": She went to the Armani couture show in the same outfit she wore to the 101 Dalmatians premiere. In 1996. [WWD]
• Freida Pinto, the female star of Slumdog Millionaire, has been criticized for the mustard-yellow strapless Christian Lacroix gown she wore to the Golden Globes. She says, "It seemed like the right choice at the time." So many things do. [Times of India]
• PETA defaced Aretha Franklin's star on the Hollywood walk of fame. They called her a "Fur hag." [Daily Express]
• At the other end of this link lies proof positive that anybody can be made to look like Marilyn Monroe for a fashion ad. You'd never know Daria Werbowy to be a brunette. [Sassybella]

[Los Angeles, January 12. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

• Does Daniel Craig have a tattoo on his magic stick? He told Jay Leno: "I have a couple of tattoos where you’d see them. There’s another where you wouldn’t. It’s hidden away."

Jay said, "Is it one of those where it says OK and then it says Oklahoma?" And Craig answered, "Yeah, it says 'Welcome to Oklahoma.'" [The Sun]

• Speaking of tattoos, Amy Winehouse wants to get Blake's name removed from her chest. Love is a losing game. [Mirror]
• Holy crap, what will happen if Peaches Geldof checks into the same hotel in St. Lucia where Amy Winehouse is vacationing? [The Sun]
• Boo, Amy's "friend" is leaving the Caribbean. Amy's dad will fly to St. Lucia to comfort her. Oh! Amy allegedly told one paper: "When I’m with Josh I don’t need drugs to feel good because he makes me feel so amazing. I’ve finally escaped from hell. I’m in love again. Look at me, I’m glowing! We just had sex... can’t you tell?" [The Sun, News Of The World]
• Is Blake Fielder-Civil filing for divorce? [Daily Mail]
• Was Angelina Jolie's face pumped full of Botox at the Golden Globes last night? [Gatecrasher]
• Heath Ledger's father says the whole family is thrilled that the late actor won a Golden Globe: "We are overjoyed for him. It's wonderful." [People]
• Sean Penn refused to attend the Golden Globes because Milk was snubbed. [Fox 411]
• Hmm, Angelina and Brad were supposed to open the show and somehow Jennifer Lopez was their replacement? [MSNBC Scoop]
• Uh-oh: The male nanny who was caring for Jett Travolta is a Scientologist photographer with no known childcare qualifications. [The Sun]
• This video supposedly shows a man falling off of a balcony and Pete Doherty fleeing the scene. [Daily Express]
• Prince Harry has apologized for the racist remarks he made on video 3 years ago; in the picture accompanying this story he certainly looks contrite. [USA Today]
• A Muslim leader calls Prince Harry's slur "sickening." [Daily Express]
• Lindsay Lohan says the tabloids and paparazzi create false information about her becuase they're into head games. "Head Games" happens to be a song by Foreigner, and Sam Ronson's dad Mick Jones founded that band. Get it? [People]
• Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony are "worming" their way into an inauguration event in DC, even though they didn't support or endorse the Obama campaign. [Page Six]
• Obama on 30 Rock?!?! [Extra]
• Madonna was spotted out with friend and photographer Steven Klein, yawn. [The Sun]
• Madonna hasn't been paying any attention to her special "friend," Alex Rodriguez, which is maybe why he took Kate Hudson out to dinner. [TMZ]
• David Beckham has started his stint playing for AC Milan: He was in the game for 89 minutes on Sunday. The AS Roma crowd booed him. [AP]
• Charlie O'Connell has flashed a picture of his new nieces, Dolly Rebecca Rose and Charlie Tamara Tulip, on his iPhone. Click and see! (They look like babies.) [E!]
• Lily Allen, 23, was hanging out with art dealer Jay Jopling, 45, but has split up with him because of his age. By the by, Jopling is worth £100 million. [The Sun]
• Wow: Faye Dunaway is guest-starring on Grey's Anatomy! [EW]
• Glenn Close, who has never committed to a TV series before, has signed on for 6 seasons of Damages: "Keep thinking of Angela Lansbury," she says. "I'll be doing my version of Murder, She Wrote." [CBS News]
• Blind items! #1: "Which pop star/reality-TV hostess and her husband tried to lure a hottie publicist into their Atlantic City hotel suite for a threesome? When the singer suddenly stripped naked and got into bed, the terrified flack made her excuses and fled." #2: "Which petite screen actress isn't as intelligent as her college degree would imply? She refuses to read the scripts her agents send her and then throws a fit when plum roles go to her harder-working peers." [Page Six]
• Blind item! #3: "Which TV and big-screen funnyman has a little too much porn on his phone? He’s reluctant to let his cell out of sight for fear someone will discover his cache of naked women." [Gatecrasher]
• The author of this piece about Cate Blanchett writes: "Cate is curious-looking, like an incredibly beautiful sea anemone, sloe-eyed, with straight, chic teeth. If I were going to be terribly picky, they’re a bit bloodless, perhaps." WTF. [Times of London]
• Roman Polanski has lost his bid to have his unlawful sex case dismissed in L.A. [Reuters]
• Michael Phelps is back in China, making commercials for Mazda. They're paying him more than $1 million to endorse the brand in China, which is the single largest sponsorship deal for a foreign celebrity in the country. [AP]
• Sheree Whitfield, one of the Real Housewives Of Atlanta, is showing at Fashion Week. No, really. [Page Six]
• High School Musical's Vanessa Hudgens scooped up "overflowing" bags of freebies in the Golden Globes swag suites while talking about the "huge house" she just bought. Tacky! [Gatecrasher]
• Has Sienna Miller been dropped from Ridley Scott's Robin Hood flick for her "partying lifestyle"? Her rep says she dropped out. Her love interest in the film would have been Russell Crowe, do with that what you will. [Telegraph, Mirror]
• Keeping Up With The Kardashians returns in March, and inquiring minds want to know if Reggie Bush will propose to Kim Kardashian on the show. Plus: Will Khloe's NBA boyfriend Rashad McCants appear on screen this season? [E!, UPI]
• Cutiepie Amanda Seyfriend is dating her hunky Mamma Mia costar Dominic Cooper! Lay all your love on me, for real. [Perez]
• Gossip about Jennifer Love Hewitt's "neediness" and "coming on too strong" sounds fishy. [Sun Times]
• Fantasia: Not homeless. [Perez]
• Kylie Minogue and her "Spanish hunk" are still going strong. Who cares if he's the "spitting image" of Olivier Martinez? [Mirror]
• Congrats to singer Jill Scott, who is pregnant for the first time. She spent her first trimester shooting HBO's The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency in Botswana. "That was one of the biggest challenges of my life," she claims. "First trimester! You're sick every morning. It was seven hours time difference, the heat, the bugs, the 14-hour days." Scott is engaged to a drummer named Lil' John Roberts. [UPI]
• None of his costars seem to know what will become of Balthazar Getty on Brothers & Sisters. [E!]
• Dustin Hoffman steals from hotels, tsk tsk. [The Sun]
• Jamie Oliver wants to save your bacon. He thinks that people are "ignorant" about the ways that pigs are raised: "How many people outside of the industry know the difference between outdoor-bred and outdoor-reared, for example? Not many." [Guardian]
• Absolutely Fabulous' Joanna Lumley is also concerned about the piggies. [UPI]
• Sadie Frost is too busy to date, unless you are a handsome Russian billionaire. [Mirror]
• Uber-bronzed George Hamilton loves talking about himself. "It’s my favorite subject." [NY Times]
• Boy George let a DJ named Fat Tony stay at his house while Fat Tony was awaiting trial for raping a 12-year-old boy in a public restroom. Bad idea? [The Sun]
• Singer Charlotte Church gave birth to her second child yesterday, a boy. [The Sun]
• A Tito Jackson paternity suit? And the offspring in question is 25 years old? Wanna be startin' something. [UPI]
• Have you seen Lil' Kim's uh, corny new hairdo? [The Life Files]
• "It is difficult to live up to the level of expectation that directors or other actors or the public and most of all the people you work with have. It is frightening." — Catherine Deneuve. [Mirror]
• "Those were blissful days, I must say. We couldn't even imagine a life in Hollywood back then. Hollywood was as distant and impossible as El Dorado. It was all about fun. Watching Emma was like watching the sun or wind or some other elemental force. Her talent even then was inescapable." — Hugh Laurie, who dated Emma Thompson back in the day. [Page Six]
• "I'm driving down the road, I'm having a drink. It's 4 o'clock; I'm supposed to have a drink. But one day I went, 'I don't see anybody else in their car with a plastic takeout container filled with ice and wine.'" — Alec Baldwin on his alcohol abuse epiphany. [UPI]
• "There are lots of nice things about British men. For instance, they can be very funny and very self-deprecating. In Britain, you very rarely get the sort of macho self-confidence of the Latin man who is soooo out there and sort of 'Yes! Of course! I'm lovely!' I like that about them. But, on the other hand, when it comes to emotions, they can also be... Well, let's face it, they can be just fantastically retarded, can't they? Almost to the point of lower case autism, really." —Emma Thompson. [Daily Mail]

Beverly Hills, CA. December 5. Image via Filmmagic.

• Madonna is divorced. A judge ruled on "Ciccone, M.L. v. Ritchie, G.S." today and the case was a "quickie," an uncontested divorce. Neither Madonna nor Guy Ritchie attended the hearing, which lasted barely a minute. Her Madgesty is single again! Think she'll get hitched to A-Rod? [Yahoo News]
• Oh snap! Madonna just had drinks with her first ex-husband, Sean Penn. [Page Six]
• A source says don't believe what you read about Guy being a gentleman and not taking a penny from Madge. He's getting a "huge pay day." [Perez Hilton]
• Friends of Madonna's are not surprised that the divorce went through so quickly. "It’s not fair to Guy, to the kids, to drag it out for any reason," says a source. [MSNBC]
• Ashlee Simpson gave birth to a baby boy last night, Bronx Mowgli Wentz. Yeah, Bronx. And yeah: Mowgli. Urban Decay Jungle Book Wentz. [People]

• Lindsay Lohan and Sam Ronson have been "fighting like cats and dogs," says a source, and may be in couples therapy. Work it out, ladies! [Page Six]
• Whoa, a kid almost died on the set of 30 Rock when an out-of-control taxi smashed into the street where the show was filming and everyone had to dive out of the way. [Page Six]
• Shia LaBeouf's wrecked truck was on eBay, but barely anyone bid on it. [TMZ]
• Michael Jackson has converted to Islam. His name is now Mikaeel. It might be so that he can legally wear a burka in court and no one can stare at his skin. [The Sun]
• Michael Jackson Mikaeel is due in court next week to defend claims that he owes Sheikh Abdullah $7 million. May Allah be with him! [Guardian]
• Ooh, more soundbites from Britney's new documentary: "Do I know my life is weird? It's all I've ever known. I don't see it as being weird… I'm kind of stuck in this place and I'm like, How do you deal? I just cope with it every day… It's better not to feel anything at all and have hope than to feel the other way… It's bad. I'm sad." [She breaks down into tears.] [EW]
• Britney on why she let "bad people" into her life: "Because I was lonely." [People]
• Twilight star Robert Pattinson was asked, "What is all this talk about you not washing your hair for months on end?" He answered: "People are scared of my hair. But it starts washing itself after about three weeks. I'm just saying that. But, yeah, if it doesn't look dirty, why wash it?" Darling, it looks dirty. Get some Pantene Pro-V up in there. [USA Today]
• America's Next Top Model winner McKey says: "I was freaking out at the second CoverGirl commercial. I almost had a nervous breakdown. They only show a little bit of it, but Christian was fixing my makeup and I was like, 'Christian, I'm freaking out right now. I might have a nervous breakdown. I haven't had a nervous breakdown in forever. I'm going crazy. Why am I here?'" Because you look like a model, maybe? [E!]
• Leonardo DiCaprio attended a "preview screening" of a music video starring ex-girlfriend Gisele Bundchen because he's friends with the director, who is Kevin Connolly. Hollywood's a small town. [People]
• Uh, are Leo and Kate Bosworth an item???? [Star]
• Leo told this paper: "So much of my life has been spent on some far-off movie location and so little of it has been lived normally. I want to get married and have children." [Mirror]
• Hollywood is a small town, take 2: Samuel L. Jackson, Denzel Washington, Eddie Murphy, Reba McEntire, Sylvester Stallone, Magic Johnson and Barry Bonds are involved in the lawsuit between North and South Beverly Park homeowners. It's like the Sharks and the Jets! [LA Times]
• Here's more on that turf war between the North and the South. [TMZ]
• Apparently Brit TV host Jonathan Ross told Gwyneth Paltrow he "would fuck her" and the BBC has called that "gratuitous and unnecessarily offensive." Think so? [Guardian]
• A critic says Baz Luhrmann made a "big, big mistake" in casting Nicole Kidman as proper English dame Lady Sarah Ashley in Australia: Melanie Reid says Kidman is "one of the most overrated actors" in the world and who has "been the kiss of death in practically every movie she has starred in." There's more! "Kidman is exquisitely accomplished at being awful," Reid writes. "She can't act. Instead she drifts around films like a lost porcelain doll, looking frozen, brittle and vapid, staring at the camera with her oh-golly-look-how-I'm-looking-interesting blue eyes." Ouch! [Sydney Morning Herald]
• Ugh, someone asked Nicole Kidman if she was pregnant again. "No, I just have a little tummy," she said. "My god, I just had a baby four months ago – give me a break!" She added: "I think I've always had a little tummy, though, it runs in the family. My sister does, my mum does, my grandmother did… We affectionately refer to it as the 'little tummy.'" Fascinating. [People]
• Glenn Close didn't get the part of Elvira in Scarface because she wasn't slutty enough? [Page Six]
• Miley Cyrus let her boyfriend attend the casting for her new video, and a source says "Justin wanted to pick a guy that looked the most like him." WTF. [E!]
• Apparently the clip of Justin Timberlake dancing with Beyoncé on SNL has been yanked from YouTube due to music clearance issues. Dammit. Not fierce, Sasha. Not fierce. [LA Times]
• Angelina Jolie might not get nominated for an Oscar for her performance in Changeling, even though Ted Casablanca thinks she should. [E!]
• Rihanna's new tattoo: "It's tribal," she says. She got it in New Zealand, and it's Maori-inspired. "It's their traditional way of tattooing. I always wanted [one]. It hurt like hell!" [People]
• ABC has killed three shows: RIP Pushing Daisies, Eli Stone and Dirty Sexy Money. [EW]
• Your friend Kanye West began his concert in Germany by having the crowd wait tow hours and then running on stage and shouting, "I really need some pussy tonight!" [The Sun]
• Baby-wipes enthusiast Terrence Howard says all he's ever wanted to do is be all around the most beautiful women in the world. "I'm sorry I'm shallow like that, I'm a man." [Perez Hilton]
• Lance Bass is glad Julianne Hough has been eliminated from Dancing With The Stars: "She was the one I was scared of the most," he says. [People]
• Is Julianne Hough retiring from DWTS? "I'm not gonna be back next season," she says. "I really, really want to focus on the music and, ya know, be taken seriously a little bit. And I think it’s hard to be on [the show] and be singing." [People]
• Reese Witherspoon looks like a small town checkout girl on the cover of Parade. [Just Jared]
• Reese told Parade: "Family is all we have in life, but I don't know how I feel about marriage. Obviously, I'm not far enough out of being married to think about doing it again." For some reason this prompted this paper to run the headline "I'm Not Ready To Marry Jake." [Daily Mail]
• Heath Ledger's family issued a statement to say that a new book about the star contains "gross inaccuracies, false allegations and many incorrect and unsubstantiated comments." The unauthorized bio, written by a journalist, claims Ledger was mentally ill. [News.com.au]
• The world is weird: Shaquille O'Neal is on Twitter. [Observer]
• Holly Madison says she's wearing less makeup now and P. Hilton says she's lying through her fake teeth. [Perez Hilton]
• Paris Hilton went out without Benji Madden and "looked distraught and completely lonesome." Sniff. [People]
• As for Benji, he is not talking about the split. [E!]
• Have you seen Rosie O'Donnell's video response to Barbara Walters? [Perez Hilton]
• Fox's Roger Friedman says Rosie will get the last laugh, because her live variety show "should be an enormous hit." It's family-friendly and positive in its celebration of Broadway, New York, and the arts. Plus comedy is what Rosie excels at. [Fox 411]
• Michael Phelps: The new spokesperson for Subway sandwiches. Do you want him on whole wheat? [Perez Hilton]
• Is Michael Phelps off the market? He flew to Birmingham to see former Miss Alabama, Doree Walker, and they went to dinner and then to the zoo the next day. Roar. [MSNBC]
• New Lost trailer! And Sawyer and Juliet are holding hands. For like a split second. [E!]
• Josh Brolin, who plays Harvey Milk's assassin in Milk, says the story of Milk made him cry. [UPI]
• If you can understand this kerfluffle surrounding Bianca Jagger's lost ring and bankruptcy and an Austrian building magnate named Reinhard Ringler, please explain. [Daily Express]
• John Malkovich is making a documentary about the plight of migrant children who cross illegally into the U.S. It will be produced by Canana Films, a production company owned by Mexican actors Diego Luna and Gael Garcia Bernal. [AP]
• Christina Ricci, Rosie Perez and Arsenio Hall will voice characters in The Hero of Color City, an animated film about a group of crayons that band together to stop a tyrant from robbing their world of color. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Katie "Jordan" Price in her underwear again, yawn. [Perez Hilton]
• Did New Kids On The Block's Donnie Wahlberg out suspected gay Jonathan Knight? [Perez Hilton]
• It's official: Jean Claude Van Damme hits on young female reporters. [23/6]
• John Cleese, 69, is dating a 27-year-old named Barbie. [The Sun]
• The headmistress of Oprah Winfrey's girls' school in South Africa, Nomvuyo Mzamane, has dropped her suit against The Huffington Post and a blogger she claimed falsely harmed her reputation. [Portƒolio]
• When it comes to cash, Bruce Willis is a die hard, heh: He invested $2 million in a Malaysian technology company and then withdrew his cash; they still owe him $900,000 and he's filed a court complaint. [AP]
• Former Senator Fred Thompson, who was on Law & Order and then tried running for president, is going back to acting. Anyone want to cast him? [AP]
• Success has made Leona Lewis "really, really lonely." Sad face! [Mirror]
• Linda Hogan was getting $40,000 a month in temporary alimony payments. Now she claims to be broke. She wants a court hearing to talk about getting more cash out of the Hulkster. [Perez Hilton]
• TRL's Damien Fahey has a new job, now that his MTV show is dead: He'll be a special correspondent for Extra. [Page Six]
• "That's debatable in Hollywood. There's the obvious answer: Angelina, for saving the planet with her adoptions and charity work." — Megan Fox, when asked who the Woman of the Year was. [E!]
• "[Four Christmases] is not for your children. It's PG-13. But my family always went to movies on Christmas Day – The Godfather, The Elephant Man. Your typical cheerful holiday fare. It's fun to go to the movies at Christmas and nice to be part of a movie that at least grown-ups and teenagers can see. Plus it means a lot when I get to have experiences where I meet young people and they say, 'You know, this is the movie that got me through a hard time' or, 'This is the movie I watch with my family.'" [Independent]
• "There are disco bands, rap bands, Yiddish folk song bands in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, but not Kiss I believe we have more gold records in America than any other group, but it's OK." — Gene Simmons, bruised because his band's not in the Hall of Fame. [Reuters]
• "That would be really exciting if that does happen. I hope it does. There has been some talk about it but I think it's in its very early days. But I'm practicing by dressing as a pirate every day - just in case!" — Russell Brand, on playing Captain Jack Sparrow's brother in the new Pirates Of The Caribbean flick. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "I did a photo shoot for her, and she suddenly took off her T-shirt to change into another and I was like, 'Damn!' She was so beautiful, elegant, classy and timeless, and there was something really exotic about it. Very few human beings have been that sexy and desirable. I wanted to say, 'You are sculpted by God.' I was like, wow." — Rosario Dawson on Iman. [Daily Express]
• "Our new president is really a person who came from a place where they told him he couldn’t be something, in a country where no one ever thought that we would see a black president, but now that we have a black president we understand that black people, white people, Asian people, Native Americans, Latinos, no matter what color you are, we all are one. Whatever you want to be you can be in this world. You just have to put your mind to it." — Common, to elementary school students in Georgia. [Concrete Loop]
• "I can drink most men under the table and be fine! And I get louder and giggly. Do I get more affectionate? Who doesn't?" — Sienna Miller. [Mirror]

[New York, November 20. Image via Splash.]

• Sofia Coppola for some reason to design shoes and bags for Louis Vuitton. "It is understood the products will be sold worldwide and launched in Japan." Will she distract us from the crappy-looking shoes with a cool soundtrack? [WWD]
• Kate Moss: The Movie. Maybe. [Graziavia The Cut]
• Usher launches lingerie line. “Comfort and intimacy is very important.” [Just Jared]
• "Alessandra Ambrosio's 4 pound Maltese named Buddha got out and is lost. He is tie dyed blue and green and is lost please help in anyway possible. She loves her dog so much and there is a large reward if someone returns him." [Perez Hilton]

• Vivienne Westwood's recession tips: "In these hard times, dress up," with towel capes and safety pin jewelry! [Daily Mail]
• No wonder her retrospective attracted 40,000 visitors. [The Star]
• In their futile attempt to sabotage the fur-lovin' Armani, PETA approaches fames bunny-boiler Glenn Close. [E]
• Post Jovovich-Hawk, Milla thinks big. “Now I’m here in Paris meeting with bigger houses about doing designing for them...Unfortunately, Carmen’s not working with me anymore–she’s taking pictures–but I am definitely going to keep designing.” [FashionWeekDaily]
• Um...what? Naomi Campbell on air travel: "I think after 9/11 you can't say anything anymore on a plane. I've flown British Airways for years, since I was a child...The stewardesses will tell you that I would get on a plane, put on the blanket and go to sleep. I'll never fly that airline again, but nothing's really lost. I did get my luggage. I was reunited with my YSL, and everything was cool." [Stereohyped]
• Lily Cole's French Playboy cover is out. [Fashionologie]
• If it's not broke: Dior reups Galliano's contract. [WWD]
• Wal-Mart bans cotton from Uzbekistan in an effort to end child labor there. [NY Times]
• Model bad-girl Alice Dellal kinda grosses out some people. 'Another fashion journalist, who also wanted to remain anonymous - because to be heard slagging off the fashionistas' favourite is hardly the done thing - told me that she found it all "baffling. She looks like she needs a good scrub. It's as if she's walked out of a 1990s Nirvana video".' [Telegraph]
• More on H&M's trials. [NY Times]
• Tennis ace Rafael Nadal to be spokesman for Lanvin fragrances. Cause sweaty athletes is exactly who I want to smell like! [WWD]
• New York Jets quarterback Brett Favre and racing icon Dale Earnhardt Jr. for Wrangler makes somewhat more sense. [AdWeek]
• Karl Lagerfeld and Tom Ford's mutual admiration interview. Given the players, disappointingly un-absurd. "For me, American fashion and the look of American elegance with an updated image is Tom. There may be others, but I don't wear those." [Time]
• Jay-Z's Rocawear sued for trademark infringement. [The Cut]
• Whether Target likes it or not, Anya Hindmarch is selling her cheapo line on her own site four days early. [Fashionista]
• Miss Sixty stores bite it. [Times of London]
• Wait, what? Gemma Ward decides she's going to be an actor, promptly nets Australian Oscar-like nom. [WWD]
• British women's breast size a whole cup larger than a generation ago; breast enlargement surgery likely culprit. [Telegraph]

(Click on any image to begin gallery)

Not Completely Awful (But Still Bad):
Glenn Close: not gonna win any innovation awards with this one — but then, she's not trying to.
Actress Dichen Lachman. Not too bad, right?
Catherine Dent. Again, nothing mind-blowing, but in this case that's a good thing.
What? Nothing wrong with Niecy Nash's separates.

The Bad:
American Idol contestant Ryan Starr: oy.
I don't know how to refer to Joely Fisher's turquoise garment — jacket? blouse? tunic? — so let's not talk about it.
At first glance, Leven Rambin's dress seemed okay. The more you look, the uglier it gets. I was going to say something about Dorian Gray, but it didn't actually make sense.
I grew to respect Gretchen Bonaduce while watching Breaking Bonaduce a few years ago. However, I dislike her crummy-looking suit intensely.
I guess I can see what Tamara Taylor was going for here, and maybe it could have been engaging were it not for the shocking sash. Yes, it shocks me.
Maybe if you live in Hollywood, as Crista Flanagan presumably does, and you go to these events every day, eventually it's like being in the Twilight Zone and those clothes that were bad become good, and who's to say they're not, if everyone else is wearing them too? I mean, is there a platonic truth?

The Ugly:
Yup. Bobby Trendy!

[Images via Getty]

Tina Fey (30 Rock), Glenn Close (Damages), America Ferrera (Ugly Betty), Julia Louis-Dreyfus (The New Adventures of Old Christine), Felicity Huffman (Desperate Housewives), Mariska Hargitay (Law and Order: SVU), Kyra Sedgewick (The Closer), Minnie Driver (The Riches), Elisabeth Moss (Mad Men) and Jeanne Tripplehorn (Big Love): these were the women who were nominated for Emmys, by-in-large playing strong, capable, well-written roles. And what's more, most of these women are, gasp, over 35.

Are there so many more available roles for women of a certain age on TV because producing a television show is that much cheaper? Are aging bodies less obvious on the small screen, and so they're more acceptable? Are Hollywood honchos just stuck believing that women don't see movies, or that men don't want to see movies with anything but eye candy? It's probably a combination of all of the above, and even though those televised, meaty roles are something to be proud of, there is not a single black actress on the short list for Best Actress Emmy (there are two Latinas: Ferrera and Eva Longoria-Parker).

I know I've said this so many times before, but there is something concrete we can do to help: go see movies made by women, or made with women in respectable roles. I'd tell you to go see something specific this weekend, but the only recent release with a plucky female protagonist is Kit Kittredge, and if you're not a Jezemom, I'm guessing that holds limited interest for you. Sigh. We clearly have a long way to go.

Warner Brothers Decides To Embrace The Women [Deadline Hollywood Daily]
Why Won't Warner Embrace The Women? [Deadline Hollywood Daily]
Warner's Robinov Bitchslaps Film Women [Deadline Hollywood Daily]
Sarah Silverman Lands In The Top 10 List Of Emmy semifinalists For Best Comedy Actress! [Gold Derby LAT]
Looks like Mary McDonnell Of 'Battlestar Galactica' And Elisabeth Moss Of 'Mad Men' Are On The Emmy Top 10 List [Gold Derby LAT]

Earlier: Ultimate Chick Flick The Women Is Finally About To See The Silver Screen

Julie Christie - Best Actress in a Motion Picture, Drama (Away From Her)

English acting legend Julie Christie is a little bit quirky and a whole lotta classy. Which is why I thought the 66-year old actress would be perfectly suited in this Louis Vuitton dress — pinstripes paired with the coy purple sheath shows that there is sexy after 50, and Christie's face would be perfectly picture-framed in that portrait collar.


Marion Cotillard - Best Actress in a Motion Picture, Comedy or Musical (La Vie En Rose)

French actress Marion Cotillard won big last night for her star-making turn as legende Francaise, Edith Piaf, the chanteuse whose heart-breaking songs weren't half as heartbreaking as her own life story. And shouldn't a performer/role that scream Vive La France! be paired with one of the country's most iconographic fashion houses, Chanel? This Karl Lagerfeld for Chanel-designed dress looks as if it were custom-made for Cotillard's moon face and full lips, the marriage of sexuality and innocence. Also, how cool are the nautical-esque rope details?


Cate Blanchett - Best Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture (I'm Not There)

I'm a little tired of seeing Cate Blanchett in Armani. Also, I imagine that Cate is a little tired herself, but not of Armani — just 'cause she now has an achin' pregnant woman's body. So I thought comfort should come first, which is easy enough in this Lanvin number, which, like Cate, seems simple but boasts an alluring complexity. (Also, I'm mad for orange!) Cate's a great beauty: She deserves to wear a dress that can match her, but allow her to shine.


Glenn Close - Best Lead Actress in a Television, Drama (Damages)

So Glenn Close gets the honors with this sexy yet sophisticated frock by Armani. She's 60-years and and still got a slammin' bod and she's damn proud of it. So why not show off a still toned chest in a diaphanous choice like this one? The shawl keeps it modest enough. Sorta. Kind of. And the cute and fabric will soften Close's appearance, which can sometimes veer towards the severe. Also, I'm all about white for formal wear. (And all against white for bridal wear. Ah, irony.)


Tina Fey - Lead Actress in a Television Comedy (30 Rock)

The idol of geek girls everywhere, I want to see Tina Fey in a dress that represents her wit and sophistication, without denying the fact that geek girls are never gonna compromise comfort for style. Also, geeks can be beauties too! Smarts, comfort, beauty? That's exactly what this strapless black gown by Israeli designer Sari Gueron offers. The attention to detail and flawless execution is like the sartorial equivalent to the perfect timing played out week after week on 30 Rock. (Or, um, whatever.) It's a dress that just screams, "Live every week like shark week."


Queen Latifah - Best Actress in a Television Miniseries Or Special (Life Support)

A longtime fan of butch suits and matronly gowns, Queen Latifah could have cut a shapely silhouette in this Catherine Malandrino ensemble. Malandrino, a designer with a bold color palette who understands that real women have curves, would be perfectly suited to Queen Latifah's personality. These wide-legged white trousers require a woman unafraid to be assertive and the delicate top, emblazoned with a faux flower, require a woman who also enjoys her feminine side.


Samantha Morton - Best Supporting Actress in a Television Show or Miniseries (Longford)

Samantha Morton is kooky, quirky, and quite the chameleon. Yet her acting work is undoubtedly some of the smartest and most complicated being done today. Which is why her fashion soul mate should be John Galliano. High drama + flawless execution + a guaranteed pinch of the unexpected = Perfect Morton-wear. This ruffled frock is sexy, not girly; fierce, not fainting. Also, have I mentioned lately how much I love orange? Morton would rock this like the oddball sexpot that she is.

Atonement, Sweeney Todd win Golden Globes [Reuters]

• Sean Penn and Robin Wright Penn are divorcing. Which is heartbreaking. We just don't want to think of Princess Buttercup feeling sad. [People]
  
• Jessica Alba and baby daddy Cash Warren are making it legal and have announced their engagement. Honestly, does anyone care? [USA Today]
  
• Poor Amy Winehouse: Has to go to court in Norway to deal with a marijuana possession charge. Hasn't our girl been through enough? [People]
  
• Ashley Olsen: Now thinner than Mary-Kate. [MSNBC]
  
• Given that the Jessica Simpson-Luke Wilson romantic comedy Blonde Ambition that opened over Christmas grossed only about $1,000 at the box office, Simpson's next film project, Major Movie Star, will be headed straight for DVD. [Page Six]

• We think that 3,000 picketing writers would make for the best Golden Globes ever. [NYT]
• Is Sienna Miller getting engaged to Rhys Ifan for her birthday today? [The Sun]
• Awkwardness abounds as the studio tries to find a way to promote the Ryan Philippe/Abbie Cornish film Stop-Loss without making the focus being the fact that it was working together on the project that Philippe and Cornish started a relationship. [Page Six]
• Miley "Hannah Montana" Cyrus and her also-15-year-old beau Nick Jonas have broken up. We would say "Oh they're only 15, this isn't even a real relationship," but then we remember Jaime-Lynn Spears. [Page Six]
• Does the fact that Miley has some not-so-innocent photos floating around the Internet have anything to do with it? [MSNBC]
• Marisa Tomei: Goes to church! What would George Costanza say? [Page Six]
• Glenn Close says her role in Fatal Attraction saved her marriage. We say that's kinda weird. [Daily Mail]
• Rebecca De Mornay was charged by the Los Angeles D.A. yesterday for two counts of misdemeanor driving. [TMZ]