• Taylor Swift received eight Grammy nominations. "I started freaking out and jumping up and down," she claims. On winning one, she says:

"The thought of that absolutely is something that you daydream about." Taylor, Imma let you finish, but Beyoncé has TEN Grammy noms. [AP, People]

• Details on the Grammy noms at this link. [NY Post]
• Taylor Swift has also inked a video-on-demand deal with Comcast. [Reuters]
• Rachel Uchitel, the first woman accused of having an affair with Tiger Woods — and who denied that she had one — is MAYBE ready to admit that she did hook up with the golfer; her attorney, Gloria Allred, has set up a press conference, which will take place today. [Radar Online]
• Here's the deal: Rachel Uchitel supposedly lied when denying an affair with Tiger Woods to protect him. And she was the one — not Jaimee Grubbs — whose texts caused an argument between Tiger and his wife. [TMZ]
• File this under shit you never wanted to know: Tiger Woods' alleged mistress, Jaimee Grubbs, "has a history of chasing famous sports professionals, tried to get into Playboy and made a sex tape." [Radar Online]
• By the by: Tiger Woods offered Jaimee Grubbs a job: he offered her a condo or apartment, and he said she could stay there for free and "sort of manage the property." [Radar Online]
• Kalika Moquin, alleged mistress #3, had no idea who Tiger Woods was when she first met him, according to sources. When she found out he was a millionaire golfer, she started hooking up with him. [TMZ]
• Ugh: Cheater-oriented website Ashley Madison wants Tiger to do ads and promotion for them. And porn company Vivid Entertainment is offering $1 million to any woman who has proof she was Tiger's lover and signs a contract with them. [TMZ]
• Tiger Woods' sponsors are standing by him, and, since he makes $110 million a year in endorsements, that's a big deal. [NY Post]
• Tiger Woods and his wife and in "intense marriage counseling." And Elin Nordegren has demanded "a total rewrite on the couple's prenuptial agreement." [Us Weekly]
• More on the Tiger Woods prenup renegotiation here. [The Daily Beast]
• Someone at a Las Vegas club spilled a drink on Orlando Bloom's shirt, so, naturally, one of his friends called the John Varvatos store and within 30 minutes, someone arrived with three brand new shirts. Right there in a packed 200-capacity dining room, Orlando took off the soiled shirt and put on a new one. Girlfriend Miranda Kerr was one of those admiring the view. [Page Six]
• Chris Brown's interview with ABC News' Robin Roberts will air on 20/20 Friday night; in this promo, Chris says: "I never ever had problems with anger. No, no domestic violence with any of my past girlfriends. I never was that kind of person. ... I look at it, and it's really, like really difficult. It's like, 'How could I be that person?'" [ABC News]
• Oprah will have a "significant presence" on OWN, her cable network launching in 2011, but she won't be doing a cable version of her talk show. [NY Post]
• George Clooney's girlfriend Elisabetta Canalis is on the cover of German FHM wearing… very little. Also, the mag calls her "Fraulein Clooney." [NY Daily News]
• Will George Stephanopoulos replace Diane Sawyer on Good Morning America? [NY Post]
• Colin Firth stars in A Single Man, a film written and director by fashion guru Tom Ford. Colin says: "He told me I looked good, but I'd look better if I had a personal trainer." Tom corrects: "I told him he was fat." [NY Times]
• Oh, great. "Despite falling ratings, MTV's The Hills will return for a sixth season." You know why? Because MTV has NOTHING else. [Variety]
• People who squabble on The Hills do shots together when the cameras are not rolling. [Page Six]
• ABC has canceled Adam Lambert performances AGAIN — this time on Jimmy Kimmel Live and New Year's Rockin' Eve. Glambert Tweeted: "Yes, sadly friends, ABC has canceled my appearances on Kimmel and NYE. :( don't blame them. It's the FCC heat ... I AM doing Leno though. And lookin into something for NYE ... It'll all blow over. Let's focus on being positive! :)" [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Whee: Ricky Gervais will host the 2010 Golden Globes. [Variety]
• Michael Lohan, ever the underminer, predicts that Jon Gosselin will lose TLC's breach of contract lawsuit against him. [MSNBC]
• In this piece, people have amusing things to say about Viggo Mortensen. The Road director John Hillcoat says: "He's a passionate guy." Director Peter Jackson says: "I just didn't know how gung-ho he'd be for everything… [If a scene called for Mortensen to climb a mountain], he'd be the guy who slept outside in a sleeping bag to get a start on the day." Fran Walsh, Jackson's partner and Lord of the Rings co-writer, says: "He's almost like a hippie. We picked him up at the airport one time, and he wasn't wearing shoes. I still have no idea how he got through the airport barefoot." Viggo himself says: "I know it sounds clichéd, but I didn't want to do anything for fame. I just love the arts." [USA Today]
• Sometimes Page Six is like a celebrity message board; today the bulletin is for Alec Baldwin's former girlfriend, Nicole Seidel: He still loves you and would do anything to get you back. [Page Six]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Tom Brady knows the sex of the fetus Gisele is carrying, even though Gisele does not. He says: "It's a pretty good feeling knowing something that no one else knows." [People]
• Ashlee Simpson has already succeeded in pissing off the cast of Chicago, and she just made her debut on Monday night. [Gatecrasher]
• Page Six claims Candice Bergen and Anna Paquin "just missed each other" at a hotel in Long Island; obviously no one at the column saw this picture from the set of The Romantics. [Page Six]
• Rosie Perez effed up her job presenting awards at the Gotham Independent Film Awards on Monday night. [Gatecrasher]
• Mother-daughter bonding! Candy and Tori Spelling have been mending their relationship! Candy says: "I'm looking forward to a lot of wonderful things. We have taken this private, which is what I've always wanted and I think so did Tori, and I'm really thrilled." [E!]
• Fresh-out-of-the-closet Meredith Baxter is writing a book about her life and shopping the story. [Page Six]
• Steven Keaton supports Elyse Keaton's decision to come out. [People]
• Yasmin LeBon critiques Simon LeBon's gigs with Duran Duran: "I give him a debrief after the show – the lights, the sound. I just can't help it." [Daily Mail]
• Hulk Hogan is engaged to girlfriend Jennifer McDaniel. [NY Daily News]
• "I was supposed to be his assistant as well as work with him on a book and other endorsements such as a motorcycle line and a kids clothing line, and kids' stackable furniture. His contract with TLC never came up. It didn't seem to concern him." — Kate Major, in a deposition in TLC's lawsuit against Jon Gosselin. [Radar Online]
• "I'm trying to find roles that demand more adulthood from me because you can get stuck in a very awful cute cycle as a woman in film - especially being such a small person. I'm a really late bloomer. In my own life, it's only been the last couple of years where I'm like, I'm an adult. I'm not totally an adult but…" — Natalie Portman. [USA Today]
• "I feel like a human being again. There was one point in time where I felt like...[Sighs.] I don't know-I felt like plastic. I think I looked plastic. My face, fat plastic. [Laughs.] I was eating, but the Vicodin made me hungry because it eats up your stomach lining, so you want to fill your stomach back up, but then it stops you up so you can't shit, you just-That's why I was gaining so much weight, I was just so fucking bloated. It's a trip when people take sobriety for granted. Feeling trapped in my addiction and then getting sober-you appreciate it so much more, because I didn't know if I would ever know what it's like to feel normal again, ever." — Eminem, who has been sober for 19 months, talks about drugs, music, Dr. Dre and much much more in an extensive interview. [Complex]
• "When you read things about Michael Jackson it's hard to decipher what the fuck is true, but there's the story of how he woke up at whatever time and he needed something to go back to sleep because he had this or that and it didn't work. That's exactly what used to happen to me: I would take a couple of pills and I would be up an hour later and I'd want more. Then I'd take more and that would be enough to maybe get me back to sleep for two more hours. Then I'd be wide awake again. So I definitely can relate, and it's a shame if he didn't have anybody there to just say, 'Michael, you're an addict, you need help.' It's one of the pitfalls of fame. I could just say, 'Yo, I need this and this and this,' and they're going to give me whatever I want…" — Eminem. [Complex]
• "I overdid everything. I was hung over for two years. If I didn't drink, I didn't do anything. It was bad. [My new album] is not all about getting sober. The problem is, I did all the drinking for my whole life in a two-year span. I wish I had spaced it out. Drinking is great. It makes you happy. But the next day, it makes everything feel as twice as bad as it was before. So what's the point? It's delicious but poisonous." — Julian Casablancas. [CNN]
• "[Being armed and dangerous] turns me on in a way I that I shouldn't be saying. It's boring to always play the victim or the compliant little woman. Eff that! Why don't you have my baby and wait at home while I go kill some mother[bleepers]? It's just very empowering." — Zoe Saldana. [Page Six]
• "[After 30 Rock, I would like to manage a Laytner's Linen on the upper West Side. Every time I'm in there, I wish I worked there — free towels." — Tina Fey. [Gatecrasher via Entertainment Weekly]

• And now, the cold, hard, retail reality sets in: Neiman Marcus and Net-A-Porter are dropping Ungaro for Spring. Barneys and Saks also aren't ordering. Lindsay Lohan and Mounir Moufarrige, what have you wrought! [Style.com]

• Ashley Tisdale does not yearn for a clothing line. "I've started a production company; I guess that's kind of my clothing line," says the actress. [WWD]
• The incredible Alexander McQueen shoes — both the bulbous hoof ones, and the ones that look like some piece of anthropomorphic weaponry out of eXistenZ, which Lady Gaga wore in the video for "Bad Romance" — are apparently a hit. The designer says he's been inundated with calls from women wanting to buy the so-called "Alien" shoes, albeit some who are interested in them as art pieces. The process by which the shoes are made is protected by copyright, says a spokesperson for the brand. No word on whether a commercial version will be produced for wide sale; McQueen is mulling a charity auction for the runway samples. [Grazia]
• Carlos Falchi's line of handbags for Target is in stores now through December 27th. The designer says, if he didn't have his current job, "I'd like to be a Brazilian cowboy." [TFI]
• Victoria Beckham's people are denying the rumors she is planning, with Simon Fuller, to open a modeling agency — perhaps a U.S. branch of Storm, in which Fuller holds a controlling stake — in New York. "There is absolutely no truth in the story regarding Victoria Beckham and Simon Fuller opening a modeling agency in New York," says her spokesman. "Victoria is concentrating all her efforts on her fashion line and her family." [Vogue UK]
• Daniel Lalonde, president of Louis Vuitton, basically confirmed Lara Stone will be the face of the spring campaign. [The Cut]
• Betsey Johnson is redesigning her stores. Gone will be the hot-pink walls, replaced with white walls and checkerboard floors, to better display the clothes. [Racked]
• Dooney & Bourke co-founder Frederic Bourke has been sentenced to 366 days in prison and a $1 million fine for his role in a failed scheme to bribe Azeri officials into privatizing Azerbaijan's oil company, which would have essentially deprived the country of profits from its greatest national resource. Bourke is appealing. [WWD]
• Model Karmen Pedaru spent a year as goalie on an Estonian national soccer team. [W]
• Funny, the only item this list of How To Look Like Gisele Bundchen is missing is: being born to look like Gisele Bundchen. (OK, so Nars Orgasm is bog standard by now, but $475 moisturizer? Come on.) [Blackbook]
• The BHV — pretty much the most awesome department store in Paris — is getting Beth Ditto and Jean-Charles de Castelbajac to do its holiday windows. Meanwhile, stately old Printemps has Natalia Vodianova. [WWD]
• The British Fashion Council will give an award to the winner of a public vote on who best "embodies the spirit of London." Nominees include Alexa Chung, Kate Moss, and Vivienne Westwood. [BFC]
• Jeffrey Monteiro might be taking over as head designer at Bill Blass. [WWD]
• Liz Lange is launching a lifestyle shopping site, apparently kind of like Gilt crossed with Daily Candy. [Crains]
• People are trying to save Luella on the Internet. [Fashionista]
• The Gossip Girl timeline is apparently now forever divided by the caesura of the Threesome; say Before The Threesome or After The Threesome, and everyone immediately knows what you mean. The boys on the show have been wearing a lot of Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen's line, Elizabeth & James, People notes. [People]
• Jason Wu is doing a capsule collection for Tse this spring. [WWD]
• Anthropologie is the most profitable of the three Urban Outfitters brands, quarterly results reveal. [TS]
• Marie Osmond is licensing her name to a fashion and home decor line. Every last piece in the Marie Lifestyle Collection will retail for under $100. Expect to see it in stores later this month. [UPI]
• Donna Karan's West Indies home is currently making us cry bitter tears of envy from our very black souls. [SB]

• Oy. Vey. When Mark Fast chose to use three plus-size models in his Friday show, one staffer allegedly quit in protest and the stylist was so abusive to the models that she was fired; a Telegraph stylist stepped in. [Fashionista]

• And it gets worse! Because some claimed that "the larger models were in need of supportive underwear beneath the tight dresses." [Guardian]
• Ashley Dupre - otherwise known as the hooker who brought down New York governor Eliot Spitzer - was not welcome at the Tommy Hilfiger store opening. [NY Post]
• Gisele is getting her helicopter pilot's license. [TMZ]
• She's also been named a United Nations Environment Programme Ambassador. Maybe that's why she needs the license? [New York]
• And she's taking on the Brazilian government over Amazon deforestation! [AP]
• Agyness Deyn is reportedly back on with Albert Hammond, Jr. Does this count as fashion news? [Daily Express]
• Pringle of Scotland is remaking its trad tweeds image in time for London Fashion week. [Independent]
• Burberry's pinning its economic hopes on Spring 2010, premiering tonight in London. [TimesUK]
• A good sign: Mary-Kate and Ashley will reportedly be at the show. [Sassybella]
• Celebrating a quarter century, London Fashion Week doesn't feel a day over 24: "London fashion has been iconoclastic and edgy for a quarter of a century, and the shows on the runways - from wacky 1980s revivals to whimsical romance - are bringing a gust of energy to a chastened fashion world." [NYT]
• La Wintour agrees: "I love the spirit of London, it is such a place for original talent. I love the way they can makes clothes out of nothing, conjure up an atmosphere out of nothing. It's very special." [Telegraph]
• Who needs nothing when you've got Naomi Campbell? "The supermodel took the Issa Spring/Summer 2010 show by storm, revealing the same flawless figure she debuted 20 years ago." [Daily Mail]
• The word on Jimmy Choo for H&M: it's ok. [Racked]
• Speaking of "democratic" collabs, Ruffian is designing for Anthropologie. [WWD]
• Norma Kamali does them one better: she's designing for Wal-Mart. And eBay. On an iPhone. [WWD]
• Which is nice for eBay, because they were just fined 80,000 euros for ripping off LVMH. [Reuters]
• LVMH can use the money, because they may be investing in fashion It girls Rodarte. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Donna Karan is launching her own line of Spanx. Except they're not called Spanx, they're called Smoothies. [WWD]
• Also in packaging news: Brian Reyes is designing condom wrappers, the proceeds of which go towards Planned Parenthood. [Sassybella]
• This is clearly going to sell out instantly. "The YSL Edition New Vintage collection will comprise a numbered range of archival styles in various fabrics from the Paris firm's inventory." Okay, probably not to us. [WWD]
• DVF talks about her husband's sexuality, which we thought was acknowledged to be gay, but whatever. "He doesn't know why (he never dated women.) He was very held and reserved. And with me it's like, shumm! [She mimes a door bursting open.] So I was flattered." [TimesUK]
• Are we ready for The Real Kate Moss? Apparently a new documentary on her friend, celeb stylist James Brown (not the dead one) will show us "how funny and warm and caring she is." [WWD]
• Twiggy: "I'm careful what I eat now as I'm older but I love food and I love cooking. I've definitely changed shape...When I was younger I weighed six and a half stone but ate like a horse. I'm now eight and a half stone and at last I have boobs – I never had those in the Sixties." [Daily Express]

[Boston, August 20. Image via INFDaily.]

• Kate Moss was shot by Mario Testino for the September cover of British Vogue. That trench coat looks very Gisele photoshop-gate/neighborhood flasher, no? [Design Scene]

• Speaking of Gisele, she has signed on to voice a series of web cartoons intended to educate children about the environment, finance, and science. The supermodel will record the role of Gigi, a supermodel who doubles as an environmental superhero. [UK Elle]
• Another image from Victoria Beckham's Armani campaign has dropped. [Daily Mail]
• Transformers director Michael Bay shot the Victoria's Secret holiday commercial. [P6]
• For some reason, Lady GaGa apparently told the News Of The World that she spends all her money on clothes. "Every single dollar that I've earned I put into my tour. Mainly into my crazy outfits. My performance is my life. And I'm not that great with money. I've gone bankrupt four times already." Um, hire a financial planner? Or a stylist who can pull Jean-Charles de Castelbajac Kermit coats for free? [NOTW]
• "My fashion wisdom comes from gardening. This is a difficult time for many, but I am not in crisis mode. Like the seasons of gardening, there is a time to plant and a time to harvest, and now is a time to weed. This will pass." Oscar de la Renta, like everyone else, is hoping he has green thumbs. [WWD]
• Mid-size fashion businesses, those who expanded in the boom years to $7-$10 million in annual sales, are at a greater risk in this recession than any other tranche of the industry, so Oscar will in fact probably be safe. But not so designers like Peter Som and Jane Mayle. As retailers continue to contend with falling consumer spending by cutting inventory and ditching labels that don't move swiftly from the racks, more designer bankruptcies over the coming season are likely. [WWD]
• Zandra Rhodes, on her style icon: "Me! Otherwise what am I designing for?" [Independent]
• We are not sure why this story, which has no news about Alexis Bledel and her projects, but several large photos of the actress wearing a leotard with incredibly teased hair, exists. But it does. Also, Alexis Bledel is not Rory Gilmore in real life. Who knew? [WWD]
• John Varvatos, who in the past has chosen rock stars like Iggy Pop as models, this year selected ZZ Top for his fall campaign. The group was shot against a diorama of water buffalo at the Los Angeles Museum of Natural History. [WWD]
• The British Fashion Council is moving its headquarters — and its largest event, fashion week — to historic Somerset House. This September, London Fashion Week is celebrating its 25th anniversary, and British designers from Matthew Williamson to Gareth Pugh have vowed to show in the city. [Telegraph]
• Bobbi Brown and Lauren Bush are co-launching a FEED makeup bag. The model's charity project supports the U.N. World Food Program. The makeup pouch will cost $50, including three Bobbi Brown lip glosses, and Bush says the cost will support 10 women in the UNWFP's Food for Work program. [WWD]
• Alexander Wang's e-commerce venture is now live. When it asks for a password, type in AWSTYLE.COM. [AlexanderWang]
• Ciara supports not texting while driving. [WWD]
• Lela Rose may be on to something as an ice cream cook. When asked her favorite flavor, the designer replied, "My own homemade ice cream called Brown Bread. It's an almond base, with bread crumbs that have been baked in butter and brown sugar with almonds. It's just delicious." [WWD]
• Roland Mouret, on quitting smoking: "I read Allen Carr books. I was hypnotised. I am now a non-smoker, and I smoked for 20 years. It's over." [Guardian]
• Catherine Deneuve and L'Oréal principal shareholder Liliane Bettencourt are among those inducted this year into the International Best-Dressed List Hall of Fame; that, in case anyone's wondering, is Vanity Fair's made-up list of well-dressed people. [VF]
• Following the news that leather suppliers were selling skins from cattle involved in illegal deforestation of the Amazon, Clarks, Timberland, Adidas, and Nike have asked that their suppliers stop that. Seems a little weak. [Guardian]
• Tom Ford's directorial debut, "A Single Man," an adaptation of the Christopher Isherwood novel that stars Colin Firth and Julianne Moore, will take place at the Venice Film Festival this September. [WWD]
• Fast-fashion chain Peacocks is making its own très Chanel-inspired quilted rain boots. Maybe they heard Audrey Tautou's endorsement of the real thing? [Guardian]
• Instead of having to pay back 100 million Euros this month, and another 350 million Euros next July, Prada has won a loan extension until 2012. [WWD]
• Uniqlo's same-store sales for the month of July fell 4.2%. [WWD]

• Michael Jackson has settled on a costume for his upcoming tour: an ensemble made entirely from Swarovski crystals. His wardrobe uses 300,000 of the sparklers. Of course, this is the man who once wore a gold-plated jacket. [WWD]

• Meanwhile at Glastonbury, the band Florence and the Machine had its outfits designed specially by Topshop. [Telegraph]
• Anna Wintour is said to have instructed Vogue petty officers to create sockpuppet accounts on Facebook to monitor fan page comments about The September Issue. [P6]
• Bucking the trend of British fashion designers returning to London Fashion Week for its anniversary, Giles Deacon has announced he'll show his Spring 2010 collection in Paris. [WWD]
• Eva Green read what you wrote about her on the Internet, but unlike Anna, she just doesn't care! "I want to wear something that I wouldn't wear every day, I like to be a bit eccentric and I know lots of people say 'Oh my god blah' but I don't care, I want to have my style, I like to try something new," said the actress, who also pines for Topshop when she's in France. [Mirror]
• 50 Cent unveiled his new fragrance, Power, at a private party in New York. While unspecific about its target audience ("Everyone human...breathing...") he did manage to shove a journalist out of his path. The way she writes it, she didn't seem to mind. Power indeed. [The Cut]
• This week sees the official previews of two dark, "intellectual" fashion ranges, heavy on the strange shapes and deconstruction, and costing around $300-$600. One is by Juicy Couture ("There is...one pair of very expensive leather leggings", but we knew that already). The other is by Comme des Garçons. Odd! [Racked] [Racked]
• Council of Fashion Designers of America menswear award winner Band of Outsiders' Scott Sternberg (who tied for the award with Calvin Klein's Italo Zucchelli) was good enough to answer some of W magazine's questions. To "Waverly Inn or Monkey Bar?" he sagely responded: "No." Asked, "Jon or Kate?" Sternberg said: "Who?" Also, Paris Hilton better not ever ask to borrow his clothes. We like him even more now. [W]
• Christy Turlington, who bagged the spring campaign, too, is coming back this fall as the face of Bally. Mario Sorrenti shot the ads. A number of fashion houses have made the choice to stick with their spring casting choices for fall. Versace re-shot Gisele in virtually the same position and dress as before, and Louis Vuitton re-hired Madonna. [WWD]
• Bar Refaeli is now the new face of Garnier Fructis. [SassyBella]
• Speaking of, L'Oréal has been found guilty of racial discrimination in French court. To market its Fructis shampoo in supermarkets, the beauty giant hired a sales staff — and was caught giving instructions in writing to a temp agency to employ only white women aged 18-22 who wear a French size 38-42. L'Oréal and the temp agency, Adecco, each have to pay fines and damages of €60,000. [Times of London]
• Models of color did not fare well at Milan menswear week. Even reliably diverse clients, like DSquared2 (which last year used an all-black cast) had virtually no faces of color on their runways. Check out these pictures to see the practically all-white casts for yourself. [FashionBombDaily]
• An Australian retail chain called Diva has ripped off a wide variety of jewelry by indie designers. [ShanaLogic]
• Let me say this again: Male modeling is just like modeling for women. Only even more poorly paid. (This article quotes 500 Euros to several thousand Euros as a typical rate for men who work the shows in Europe — and says that it's lower than what women models get. Why do reporters never keep in mind who they're asking? In this case, it's a pair of twins who started out by booking campaigns for Dolce & Gabbana. Nothing about their experience of the industry is average.) [Telegraph]
• Project Runway's Leanne Marshall wrote on her personal blog that she was unhappy with a business opportunity gone sour — but one which it was too late to pull the plug on. Discontent with retail partner Bluefly is the only logical conclusion. [Racked]
• Ex-model and PR whiz Carlos Souza has returned to the house of Valentino to try and repair its damaged reputation. Since Valentino's departure, the brand has suffered through the embarrassing ousting of the talented successor Alessandra Facchinetti, and lackluster collections designed since then by two of Valentino's former assistants. [FWD]
• Vena Cava now has a blog. [Viva Vena Cava]
• Philippe Starck has launched a new clothing line, which he describes as "non-photogenic." It's made of waterproof cashmere and designed to last a long time, which is still enough to prick our interest. [UnBeige]
• Dress Barn announced plans to buy Tween Brands Inc., which operates the Limited Too and Justice. [WSJ]
• Nike, which cut 5% of its global workforce, some 1,750 jobs in May, saw sales for the fourth quarter decline to $341.4 million, from $490.5 million the year before. Orders for the next few month are also down 12%. [AP]
• Troubled Jones Apparel Group is betting on the Asian market. It just bought a 15% stake in the Hong Kong-based retail distribution group GRI, upping its total stake in the company to 25%. [WWD]
• H&M's sales are up by 6.4% in the quarter just ended. Revenue climbed 23%. [WSJ]
• Uniqlo is talking about buying the Gap. [Independent]
• The company that owns Lacoste has chosen the former head of the European supermarket chain Carrefour to lead the brand. [WWD]

• The economic situation has encouraged a measure of conservatism in fashion, but this is extreme. Versace's Fall 2009 ads with Gisele Bundchen in a jewel-toned dress under strong directional light look exactly like Versace's Spring 2009 ads with Gisele Bundchen in a jewel-toned dress under strong directional light. [Fashionologie]

• Gisele ain't pregnant, after all. [AP]
• The recession's latest casualty is Belgian designer Veronique Branquinho. After 11 years in business, the Antwerp-based designer is being forced to stop production of her namesake line due to a drop in Fall 2009 orders and a number of canceled orders and non-payments from Spring 2009. Branquinho has a fall-back position: artistic director of the Belgian leather goods brand Delvaux. [WWD]
• British designer Emma Cook is also discontinuing her line for fall. Cook herself did not make the announcement, but a manager at Manhattan boutique Opening Ceremony mentioned the news in an interview. [Paper]
• Puma has apparently listed all but one of its 11 U.K. stores with real estate agents — although the company claims it has yet to finalize decisions about store closures. [FT]
• Donatella Versace, on why the 80s trend is less interesting than techno fabrics: "I knew that trend was coming. I knew exactly when every designer was going to start doing it. And I couldn't, because I was with Gianni doing the '80s, in the '80s. I have so many pieces in the archives that I could put right out on the runway and they'd be perfect. [laughs] In general, I think, yes, we can look back, but not that much. It's too literal. Like shoulder pads. We belonged to that time. But for me, it doesn't make sense today. You can play with it for one season, but it's not going to be revolutionary. I think we should move forward, not back. To define the era we live in is very difficult. How do we define it? We define it by music. That's different today. We listen to different music than we used to 10 years ago. Fashion is struggling to define itself today. For me, I'm concentrating more on fabrics, on the technological aspect of fabrics." [Interview]
• Which, you know, totally fits, because the iPhone is the future of the fashion economy. [WWD]
• A man named Jinyoung Jo has designed a Chanel concept car in South Korea. His effort, the Fiole, comes with crystal double-C logos on the grill and on the wheels. It's a pretty snazzy little space-age sports car, to be sure, but what we wonder is: can anyone just up and design a Chanel something? Trademark and copyright protection law would suggest otherwise. It's not clear if Jo had Chanel's approval to make this car. [Sassybella]
• And we all know Chanel polices its intellectual property like the proverbial hawk. The company just announced a lawsuit against a Manhattan jewelry store, Joseph Anthony, for allegedly selling counterfeit Chanel baubles. [NY Post]
• Barbara Hulanicki, on her customers, past and present, and why she hates Barbie: "In that period in England, they hadn't traveled at all and they were very green. And now they're brainwashed by Barbie doll...She's been so damaging. [CHUCKLES] She has such abominable taste." [Interview]
• A see-through swimsuit (for efficient tanning, duh) sounds like just the sort of thing Barbie would approve of. And it sounds like melanoma. [Telegraph]
• Carlos Falchi, known for his extremely expensive handbags and penchant for python skin, is to be the next designer to have a Target GO! International accessories collection. Falchi's line for Target will be available in stores and online from October 11, and will comprise 13 pieces. The styles include jewel-toned faux-snakeskin pieces, and some bags which incorporate patchwork. [WWD]
• Marios Schwab, newly named creative director of Halston, on how he is not Roy Halston Frowick, reincarnated: "It would be a little bit weird to ask a designer who is exactly like Halston to design Halston, don't you think? I mean, I don't think Halston, if he were alive today, would be doing the seventies in 2009, you know? And anyway, there's so much more potential for an interesting result if the designer is versatile. From the perspective of the label, I think they wanted someone who understood the DNA of the brand and shared something of it, but who could bring a new idea." [Style.com]
• H&M opened its 10th Manhattan store, on the Upper East Side. [WWD]
• J. Crew earned $20.4 million in the quarter ended May 2 — a decline of 33% on last year's results, but still ahead of analysts' expectations. CEO Millard Drexler says the chain is sopping up customers from higher-end boutiques who've been priced out of their usual market. [WSJ]
• Tiffany's reported earnings of $24.3 million, which isn't too shabby for a company known for its diamonds in this economy of lowered expectations. But it's still a decline of 62% on last year's profits. Sales fell 22% overall — and 31% in the Americas. Among the worst-hit was its Manhattan flagship, where sales declined by 42%. [The Street]
• Bankrupt men's clothier Hartmarx won extra time to negotiate a possible sale to private equity firm Emerisque. Emerisque has pledged not to liquidate the business, should its bid prove successful. Hartmarx's main debt obligation is to Wells Fargo; employees at its Chicago area factory have threatened to sit-in if the business folds. [WWD]
• Natalie Suliman, a British lingerie model, claims that not only were her breasts not retouched for a Marks & Spencer billboard, but that she wasn't even wearing so much as a spot of body makeup. Or moisturizer. (Just to be clear: That. Does. Not. Happen. And how would the model know what happened in post-pro, anyway?) [Daily Mail]

• Vogue subscribers are lured with a free-gift gimmick that looks...different when it comes in the mail. Of course, subscribing to Vogue is basically scheduling disappointment monthly, but the bait-and-switch is not normally so overt. [NYPost]

• Natalie Portman would very much like to tell you about some t-shirt brand she likes. Band tees are a great way of learning about music, see! [Daily Beast]
• Lauren Hutton might miss the Met ball, which is themed around models this year, because a young surfer accidentally rammed his board into her knee in Hawaii, causing ligament damage. "The only thing that's holding our foreleg bones attached to our thigh bones are these little ligaments around the knee," said Hutton. "And once they go, the bones fall sideways inside the bag of skin. It was like one of those Halloween skeletons." The supermodel, currently in LA, cannot walk without crutches. Her date, Michael Kors, will probably understand if she stays home. [Daily Intel]
• Fellow famously made-up face Isabella Rossellini is pretty sure Lancôme regrets dumping her back in 1995 for being soooooo old. But she made her money and now does videos about the sex lives of animals. Lancôme contents itself with Rossellini's daughter, Elettra Wiedemann. [WWD]
• "I'm Not A Plastic Bag" designer Anya Hindmarch says, "Accessories are how women accent their character; they are a form of self-expression. If you see someone carrying a tatty, beaten-up handbag, full of crumbs, doesn't it kind of make you wonder if their house is just like that, too?" She would say that, wouldn't she? [Telegraph]
• Adriana Lima, the Brazilian model best known for wearing giant wings and Bedazzled bras for Victoria's Secret and looking hot on the covers of men's magazines, stunned when she walked for Givenchy in Paris. (Normally, the fashion industry likes to draw as bright a line as possible between camp and the "real" stuff.) Could she be working herself out from under the taint of commercial lingerie to take on a Givenchy campaign for fall? And does that mean Lima is transforming into a Gisele-style double threat, who magically gets bookings for Dior and drugstore makeup at the same time? [Fashionologie]
• Hudson St. in New York's West Village has 15 empty storefronts on one six-block stretch — and, like, 14 Marc Jacobs, Marc by Marc Jacobs, and Ralph Lauren shops. Some see a connection: one retailer, who did not want to be named, said that when businesses' leases turn over, landlords are asking for steep increases in rent, because the high-end retailers are able to pay up to $60,000/month. "They are killing the Village," the man said. "Ten years ago — mom-and-pop stores gone, restaurants gone, they're all gone." [The Villager]
• Tao Okamoto, the hot "new" Japanese model with the interesting haircut, bagged the Fall Ralph Lauren campaign — and, according to rumor, the Fall ads for the Polo Ralph Lauren line, too. [Style.com]
• Nadja Swarovski, scion of the Austrian crystal concern, is a pretty brilliant businesswoman who's taken her family's product from an icon of kitsch to the raw material of fashion's avant garde. But that's not what makes this profile writer like her: the fact that she feels she doesn't see her kids often enough ("much as one rushes to reassure, she is probably right," notes the Times) is the chink in the armor that lets her feel comfortably pitying. The profile is sprinkled with German words, but unfortunately Schadenfreude is not one of them, so let me insert it here. [Times of London]
• Robin Givhan writes this week about the Museum at FIT's announcement of its upcoming Isabel Toledo exhibit, and the question of fashion exhibits in general. The most popular clothing shows are inevitably those organized around a celebrity name, like Jackie O's at the Met; "It's an ongoing battle," Givhan writes, "in fashion exhibitions: the scholarly preference for the clothes to stand on their own and the public fascination with the back story." [WaPo]
• Stila, the makeup brand recently rumored to be facing bankruptcy, has been saved at the 11th hour by a New York private-equity firm. Patriarch Partners will acquire the brand from Wachovia and CIT Group, the banks that took Stila over after it defaulted on debt obligations. [WSJ]
• Filene's Basement is in a similarly dire position — facing bankruptcy and courting buyers. The discount chain closed 11 stores in January, but its parent company said Friday that the cost-cutting moves are "not likely to lead to sustainable operations for Filene's Basement." How is it possible that "it's like a department store, but everything's on sale" is a failing business model at this juncture? [Crain's]
• Valentino's operating profits fell 7% in 2008, the year its founder and namesake retired. [WWD]
• J. Crew opened a beach-themed store in Malibu. [LA Times]
• Headstrong model Elle MacPherson popped home to Sydney for Easter, and made a supermarket deli worker come out from behind the counter to load her cart. Then she snapped at a gossip columnist and micro-managed a television appearance. [News.com.au]

• Has Britney Spears "fallen" for her backup dancer, Chase Benz?

A source says: "Brit really loves the way Chase looks, and she has a thing for Southern boys with loads of charm. She's totally into him. And being on tour again, plus having a sexy new guy to get close to, has put Brit in a great frame of mind." And that metal codpiece is just a bonus! [Daily Mail]

• Chris Brown denies that he has a new girlfriend. A source says that he and the lady in question "met recently. They're friends. That's it." [People]
• Amy Winehouse heard that hubs Blake Fielder-Civil got some other woman pregnant, and she is working on a song about it! The tune, called "The Ultimate Betrayal," goes: "Blake a baby, no, no, no." A source says, "It's very haunting." And by that you mean familiar and repetitive? [The Sun]
• This story seems mildly preposterous but here it is: John Mayer used to tell Jessica Simpson: "I'm really attracted to your spiritual side." A source says: "He'd tell her that every time she opened her mouth to speak. It was a nice way of basically saying, 'Just sit there and be pretty, and don't ruin it with talk.' The sad thing is she started to tell people, 'I'm working on being more spiritual,' and then just sit there quietly." [Page Six]
• In a Vanity Fair poll, 58% of respondents named Angelina Jolie "the most beautiful woman in the world." Gisele was a distant second with 9% of the vote. And what is the point of pitting women to compete against each other in a completely subjective competition again? [MSNBC Scoop]
• Madonna's former nanny was on Australian TV saying things like Madonna is a "fantastic mother" and so this column wonders if she is still on the payroll. [MSNBC]
• Apparently Lil' Kim's top nearly dropped on during a jive on Dancing With The Stars; she told a reporter after the show: "I don't know why this happens a lot of the time, but ... the girls were tryin' to come out." [AP]
• Deaf actress Marlee Matlin spoke to Joy Behar about sexual abuse, drugs and her volatile relationship with actor William Hurt; the transcript is up. She was molested by a babysitter at age 11; she was molested again by a teacher at age 14 and of her relationship with William Hurt, she says, "there was violence." [CNN]
• Meryl Streep plays Julia Child in the new flick Julie & Julia, but how did the 5 foot 6 actress play the 6 foot 2 chef? "Meryl believed that in order to capture the essence of the character, you had to believe Julia Child is 6-foot-2," says writer/director Nora Ephron. "Actually, our ambitions were more modest. We made her 6 feet. We used a whole bunch of fabulous tricks. Everything we could think of. Ann Roth did amazing things with costumes." [USA Today]
• Former Fugees star Wyclef Jean was the target of an assassination plot in Haiti. "They had a plot to assassinate me, but it obviously didn't go down. I take what I do very seriously, but I fear nothing... except my mamma." [Daily Express]
• Eminem's path back to the spotlight continues: He'll perform at the MTV Movie Awards next month. [UPI]
• Zac Efron is super adorbs on the cover of GQ, and inside he talks about getting advice from Leonardo DiCaprio: "He said, 'There's one way that you can really fuck this all up. Just do heroin.'" [People]
• Goop poop: Gwyneth Paltrow wants another baby. "At first I thought 'OK, that's it, I'm done, no way will I have more.' Then my son turned two and you think, 'Oh, I don't want this to be the last two-year-old I have. Maybe I'll do one more." The real question is, what will she name the sibling of Apple and Moses? Eden? Plum? Cain? Abel? Jesus? [The Sun]
• By the by, Gwyneth threw Moses a superhero-themed party in Los Angeles over the weekend. [Mirror]
• Guess who else wants another kid? Jessica Alba. We know this because she was shopping for real estate with her husband and wanted a place big enough for another baby. Says a source. [Ok!]
• Real Housewife LuAnn De Lesseps has been invited by Judge Lynn Toler to appear on Divorce Court. Is it classy enough for the Countess? [NY Daily News]
• ANTM hottie Nigel Barker wants you to know about baby seals being clubbed to death in Canada: "It's not a hunt, it's a massacre on the ice. Its barbaric." [NY Post]
• In this video, Hugh Jackman and Daniel Henney woo ladies on a Korean TV show in the most hilarious ways. [YouTube]
• After the director of the brand made what Jay-Z thought was a racist remark, Jay started boycotting Cristal and supporting Armand de Brignac champagne instead. Now Armand De Brignac is selling out its entire production run of 60,000 bottles. [Independent]
• Oooh: Lily Allen was the secret voice of Atomic Kitten, when she was 14 years old. [The Sun]
• Your friend Kanye West was supposed to be arraigned on misdemeanor charges — he's accused of breaking a paparazzo's flash last September — but his court date has been delayed until May. [Yahoo News via AP]
• Mel Gibson was heard telling people at the Roman Catholic church he had built in 2005: "Well, she's filed for divorce." [People]
• Jamie Foxx's Sirius radio show, The Foxxhole, spent a good minute and a half making fun of Miley Cyrus, calling her "that little white bitch," "the one with all the gums," who needs to "get like Britney Spears and do some heroin" or "go get chlamydia from a bicycle seat." Charming. [Perez]
• Prince William made a mistake in a £1 million Royal Airforce plane during training — flipping the wrong switch and "overcooking" the engine — but apparently the plane is fine and the prince is fine and everything is fine. [Daily Mail]
• Not that you care, but Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo are on the rocks and argue all the time. [Gatecrasher]
• Jenna Jameson has blogged about giving birth to her twins, Jesse Jameson and Journey Jette. She says: "I truly believe the 500 sit ups a day paid off. I was able to push my 5 pound Jesse out in 5 pushes." [ONTD]
• Lost star Josh Holloway and wife Yessica are the proud new parents of a baby girl named Java Kumala Holloway. [People]
• Animal guy Jeff Corwin is getting a show on the Food Network. He'll travel the world, meet with natives, sample "exotic" foods and learn about local customs. Kind of like Anthony Bourdain does? [EW]
• Is it the hair, the eyes or the mouth that make Phil Spector's mug shot so creepy? [TMZ]
• The high school in Kalama, Washington which was used in the filming of Twilight has become a tourist attraction. Fans have come from as far as Germany to visit the parking lot. What a world. [AP]
• The late George Harrison of the Beatles will get a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. [Mirror]
• Blind item! "Which young songbird not only had lipo on her stomach, but even got the "back fat" sucked out from under her bra line?" [Gatecrasher]
• "You haven't responded to my emails, phone calls and text messages. You say you look at my website, so I'm trying to reach you that way. I want to see you and your family – in private, like the 'normal family' you say always wanted." — Candy Spelling, to Tori Spelling, on CandySpelling.com. [People]
• "I hate the internet. I find it dehumanising to constantly check emails or social sites which have become so fashionable. I'm not a celebrity. I don't go home or out with friends saying I'm a celebrity and I don't ask to be treated like a queen. Mum and dad wouldn't like that." — Keira Knightley. [The Sun]
• "I wasn't programmed by Disney. It's common sense. If you're gonna be drunk with your friends, don't get wasted at the Chateau Marmont and hook up with some famous chick. It's not rocket science." — Zac Efron. [People]
• "I like going to England. Women in England are really racy. Very very — uh — very fast. Very very nice. I like it." — Danny DeVito. [Mirror]
• "The movie poster should say, 'Starring Meryl Streep, Amy Adams and boeuf bourguignon.' My car crashes are burnt stews. You cannot begin to imagine how much eating there was, how much food. There was a huge kitchen on a soundstage with two fantastic people in it. Whenever a dish had to be made for the movie, they had to do at least seven of them. And there were always several left over." — Nora Ephron, on her new movie about Julia Child, Julie & Julia. [USA Today]
• "Age holds absolutely no fear for me. There is so much enjoyment ahead. Sophia [Loren] is 74 and amazing – every time I talk to her, she's full of wonderful stories about old actors." — Penelope Cruz. [People]
• "It's all about a woman's reproductive cycle and how we become fertile in terms of bearing children at a young age and then at a certain point in life we are no longer fertile in that sense. I think women can be at their most creative, their most dynamic, when their biological fertility cycle is over. So that's basically what that's all about. Just when I thought it's all over for me, I find myself in the most exciting, creative time of my entire life." — Kathie Lee Gifford, on her new book, Just When I Thought I'd Dropped My Last Egg. [Time]

• In case you hadn't noticed, a new Lindsay Lohan feeding frenzy has begun.

Does the woman have problems? Probably. Sure. This headline, however — "Lindsay Meltdown! Chugging Vodka After Breakup With Sam" — is just sensationalist. She was seen drinking, and crying, but her mom was there, sipping wine. So. [RadarOnline]

• More on this in Midweek Madness but: On this week's Us: Lindsay Lohan. Suicidal. [Perez]
• And Lindsay says she's in "absolute hell." [Us Magazine]
• Samantha Ronson is not, repeat not seeking a restraining order against Lindsay Lohan, and she and LL "are totally communicating." [People]
• Madonna has donated about half a million bucks to Italian earthquake victims; her grandparents lived in Pacentro, Italy, until 1919. [People]
• Howard K. Stern's lawyer says Stern is innocent and "no one enabled" Anna Nicole Smith when it came to drugs. Yeah, sure. [CNN]
• Rihanna is leaving Barbados after partying with her grandparents; she looks super happy in this pic snapped at the airport. [TMZ]
• Cops continue to investigate the shooting at Gisele's wedding; can't you just imagine bodyguards shrugging and feigning innocence while their guns are concealed under their jackets? [Mirror]
• Countess LuAnn de Lesseps — soon to be divorced — was seen singing karaoke while having a girls' night out, just like classy royals are wont to do. [Page Six]
• I'm not loving Rachel McAdams' hair on the cover of the new Marie Claire but what are you gonna do. She is a cutie, though. [ONTD]
• So Rachel McAdams took part in Marie Claire's book club, and read Prodigal Summer. She says: "I absolutely fell in love with this book. I don't think I got out of bed for three days-I was just eating it up. My favorite story line was the one between Deanna and Eddie Bondo. I found that totally hot. It was one of the hottest love stories I've ever read." [ONTD]
• You know how Paris Hilton has been saying Doug Reinhardt was "going to be" her husband? Apparently she is thinking about a summer wedding, maybe August in the Bahamas. Five bucks says no. [Mirror]
• Taylor Swift looks gaudy and scheming on the new eye-searing cover of Seventeen. [Perez]
• Jessica Simpson is "ignoring" Eminem's video, which is probably best. Also, she has not been dropped from her country label; she was "on loan" and continues to be on Epic records or whatever. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Zac Efron stars in an epic Funny Or Die video that's supposed to go up later today. Also in the clip: Brody Jenner, Joel Madden, Queen Latifah, Justin Long, Nicole Richie, Vanessa Hudgens, Carmen Electra, Brittany Snow and Lance Bass. [EW]
• Amy Poehler and a dead squirrel are on the cover of TV Guide. Amy dishes on the secret of her success: "In 1992, I met an old gypsy woman on the side of the road and she gave me a magic bean. I ate it and that was it. The hard part was I had to chop off her head after she gave it to me. But now look at me. I'm famous." [Just Jared]
• Nadya Suleman, mother of octuplets, is talking about how she financed her in vitro: She inherited $30,000 from an aunt and worked overtime at her job in addition to the disability payments she received. [MSNBC]
• There' some kind of feud going on between Holly Madison and a Las Vegas TV reporter, but honestly? Yawn. [Perez]
• Meanwhile, Kendra Wilkinson has been hanging out at the shooting range. [People]
• Peaches Geldof went clubbing and someone poured a beer on her head and this is newsworthy. [The Sun]
• Lenny Kravitz got fan mail… from French Prez Nicolas Sarkozy! [Reuters]
• Helena Bonham Carter will be in Terminator: Salvation; apparently stills released this week show her with half her face shaved off and her brain visible. Bring it! [Independent]
• Can you picture Al Pacino playing Napoleon? It's gonna happen! For a screen adaptation of a children's book called Betsy And The Emperor. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Rob Lowe won his lawsuit against his former nanny, by the by. She violated the confidentiality agreement she signed by telling everyone Lowe's business. [TMZ]
• Gorgeous and talented Sanaa Lathan will host Lens On Talent, a BET show for undiscovered filmmakers. [USA Today]
• Liam Neeson went to the 70th birthday party of Sir David Frost, on of Neeson's first appearances since the death of his wife, Natasha Richardson. [Telegraph]
• Tim Roth will play a "gnarled tramp" in Skellig, a family film to be shown on TV Easter weekend in the UK. [Telegraph]
• One of the choreographers from So You Think You Can Dance, who was arrested last week for alleged sexual assaults, is expected to be released without any charges pressed by prosecutors. Yeah. [TMZ]
• Jamie Waylett, 19, also known as Vincent Crabbe in the Harry Potter movies, was busted for having a cannabis farm at his mum's house. Maybe he needed it for his Defence Against the Dark Arts class? Herbivus inhalus! [Daily Mail]
• What the world needs now: A Seinfeld porn parody. [The Sun]
• For the love of Zeus why are they remaking Romancing The Stone?!?!?! [UPI]
• Blind item! "Which seemingly down-to-earth starlet is actually a wicked diva? When she wasn't featured as prominently as her other cast members in a recent photo shoot, she left the set in a huff." [Gatecrasher]
• Strictly Come Dancing is an obsession for my entire family. I don't watch much TV but I like that show. You will see me on Strictly or the US version Dancing With The Stars." — Emily Blunt. [Daily Express]
• "We were both looking for our walks, having this great time competing and yet helping each other. I tried all these walks, like that Monty Python sketch, the silly walks. I went to bars in Texas, trying to pass as Texan, trying to get something real. He got his walk, I found mine. And then I came into the make-up room and he shows up with these horrible false teeth that he'd gotten from his dentist. I was so jealous. I mean, I had a walk, he had the limp. But he had the teeth, too." — Jon Voight, on working on classic film Midnight Cowboy with Dustin Hoffman. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "I loved the way [the author, Barbara Kingsolver] linked the interconnectedness of nature with the interconnectedness of human relationships. When she writes in the beginning that "solitude is only a human presumption," I thought that was so true. I mean, we all think we're the center of the universe, but we don't exist alone. It's that ripple idea that you cannot touch one thing without affecting another." — Rachel McAdams on Prodigal Summer. [ONTD]
• "I'll be a soccer mom. Like Posh Spice. I'll be there in my heels cheering on my kids. 'Go, team, go!' But I'll have no idea what's going on." — Miley Cyrus, on where she'll be in 10 years. [USA Today]
• "It's a serious crime and there's no doubt it's very disappointing — I was heartbroken by it. Obviously people are seeing an unfinished film. It's like a Ferrari without a paint job." — Hugh Jackman on the Wolverine leak, about which he is "heartbroken." [Reuters]

• Gisele Bundchen married Tom Brady again, this time in Costa Rica. They first got hitched in the U.S. in February. These days you can't be a celebrity and not have two or three ceremonies. [Breitbart, Mirror]

• Oh! But! There was gunfire at Gisele's wedding: Bodyguards shot at paparazzi. No one was injured, but the back window on an SUV was shattered. Says one snapper: "I could have lost my life for the sale of some pictures that Gisele didn't want published. Are they insane?" [NY Post]
• Madonna reportedly "shrieked in horror" when she found out that a judge was denying her adoption of Mercy. [Pop Dirt]
• Madonna has left Malawi in her private jet and is headed for London. [Star Tribune]
• Madonna is said to be "in pieces." [Daily Mail]
• And now Madonna is back in the UK; Guy Ritchie met her at the airport. They didn't seem to speak to each other but he had a big hug for David. [Daily Mail]
• Rihanna is partying in Barbados — it's her grandparents' 50th wedding anniversary. Her father says the singer is "back to herself." [Daily Mail]
• Meanwhile, Chris Brown is due in court today where he will do some "intense" plea dealing. [NY Daily News]
• Over the weekend, news broke that Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson had a huge fight and that Sam changed the locks at her house. Ouch! [TMZ]
• Lindsay was specifically asked not to attend a Charlotte Ronson party but showed up anyway. [Socialite Life]
• Did Lindsay go on a Twitter tirade? This report says she wrote: "Being cheated on does wonders to you. I'm doing this publicly because u&ur friends call People [magazine]. So you win, you broke my heart. Now go away. I loved you." So wait, Sam cheated? Also, not so long ago, you couldn't get LL to admit she was IN a gay relationship; now she announces the details to the whole world??? [This Is London]
• Farrah Fawcett, who has been battling cancer for almost three years, is in a hospital in L.A. [Reuters, RadarOnline]
• Meanwhile, her son, Redmond O'Neal, was busted for drugs yesterday. In the parking lot of a prison. Not a joke. Also, Ryan O'Neal says Farrah just went in for a procedure and "is not at death's door." [NY Post, EW]
• This report says the end is near for Farrah Fawcett. [MSNBC Scoop]
• This paper claims that doctors fear the worst for Farrah. [NY Post]
• Scandalous: Jennifer Aniston was seen smiling and laughing and generally having fun. [Gatecrasher]
• Dear Beyoncé, the bangs and the heels are understandable, but the suspenders? [Daily Mail]
• Paris Hilton says of Doug Reinhardt: "We're best friends. It's not like we just met. We've known each other over the past year. I was in a relationship before and we reconnected. I'm really in love and really happy. He's going to be my husband." Does that sound like a threat? [E!]
• There's a sneak peak of season five of The Hills up, and apparently the big question is whether Heidi and Lauren will reconcile. But the even bigger question is: Does anyone still care? [E!]
• Speaking of The Hills, Lauren Conrad's new guy, Kyle Howard, wants to marry her, so he took her mom and dad out for lunch — and picked up the tab. [Star]
• Ryan Gosling has a band, and the band has a video, and it's here. [Pop Sugar]
• Oh, Christ: After enduring all kinds of shit for those bikini pictures, now this headline from the Daily Fail: "Has Jennifer Love Hewitt Lost Too Much Weight?" [Daily Mail]
• Katherine Heigl and Ashton Kutcher are shooting a flick called Five Killers and it appears that they kiss. [Socialite Life]
• "How Poor Suri Cruise Has Become A Style Victim At Just Three Years Of Age." [Daily Mail]
• Behold: Victoria Beckham in enormous shoulder pads. [Daily Mail]
• Gossip Girl's Blake Lively and Penn Badgley have left the country to vacation in Thailand and you have not. [Just Jared]
• It's not that Serena Williams can't find a pair of bikini bottoms that fit, it's that her derriere is awesome and will not be held down! [Daily Mail]
• Anna Kournikova took part in a triathlon in Miami on Sunday. [Daily Mail]
• Ooh, Seal will sing the National Anthem at the Red Sox/Tampa Bay Rays game today! [The Star]
• You may find this hard to believe, but Gary Coleman regrets doing a movie titled Midgets vs. Mascots. He has a YouTube rant explaining his mortgage made him do it. [Page Six]
• Possible new couple: 50 Cent and Ciara. [Page Six]
• Bai Ling wants you to know that Bai Ling never had sex with Mickey Rourke. [Page Six]
• A square-faced Jack Black slays demons with his guitar in a new video game called Brutal Legend. Check out his heart-shaped soul patch! [Wired]
• Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green are not only back on, but looking for a "love nest" in Santa Monica. Megan wants ocean views because "she loves the beach and spotting dolphins." [Star Magazine]
• The series finale of ER did okay, ratings-wise, but not as well as Cheers or Friends. [AdAge]
• Miley Cyrus' wardrobe in the Hannah Montana movie is "clean cut, wholesome and decidedly demure." Are times changing?!?! [LA Times]
• Between Carrie Underwood, Taylor Swift and Julianne Hough, women ruled at the Academy of Country Music Awards. Do you have to be blonde and toothy, or is it just a coincidence? [Yahoo News ia AP]
• Christina Ricci will star in a "porn-tinged comedy" co-written by Adam Sandler. She'll play "an innocent girlfriend." [Hollywood Reporter]
• Jennifer Hudson's fans worry about her and can't stop talking about how they hope she doesn't cry while she is singing. [Washington Post]
• Jennifer Hudson says, "I'm fine, I'm happy." [USA Today]
• By now you must have heard: Demi Moore saved a suicidal woman's life via Twitter? [The Star]
• Brandon Michael Vayda, who plays Mike on 90210, pulled some guy out of a taxi and "beat the living crap out of him" outside of a nightclub. [TMZ]
• Alex DeSilva, a choreographer from So You Think You Can Dance, was arrested Saturday and charged with four counts of sexual assault. All of his victims were his students at the time. [E!]
• Fox's Roger Friedman wrote about the leaked flick Wolverine (which the FBI is investigating) in his column, saying, "It took really less than seconds to start playing it all right onto my computer." Now he's been fired. Whoops! [NY Times]
• Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr sang together for the first time in years at a benefit to introduce children to transcendental meditation. And yes, David Lynch runs the foundation in question. [Breitbart]
• Jeff Beck, Metallica, Run-DMC, Bobby Womack and Little Anthony and the Imperials were inducted into the hall of fame over the weekend. [NY Times]
• Fast & Furious sped away with a $72.5 million box office, which is huge. Huge. [Breitbart]
• Thousands lined the streets of London and Essex at the funeral of Jade Goody, which this paper calls "Princess Diana-style." [Daily Mail]'
• Jade Goody's family says they don't want her grave to be a shrine, "trampled by strangers." [The Sun]
• Blind item! "Which C-list Hollywood stud was so drunk and desperate that he showed up at the home of an L.A. gossip reporter and demanded a booty call? Guess what, folks? She accepted!" [Gatecrasher]
• "There's a time for celebration and I partake, sure. But you know, it's important not to let that become too big of a distraction. The more you have access to, the harder it is to remain focused. You know what, I do not want to fall victim to that, it's too easy and too often done. It's out of style anyway, I think too many people have done it before me, I'm not going to. It's uncool, yeah. I think the rebellious thing to do would to actually be successful." — Zac Efron on drinking and the Hollywood party scene. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "I'm excited to not have everything scheduled in advance. I can just call up a friend and grab lunch. I can wear white when I want to — I could never do that on camera. I can go backless!" — Lauren Conrad, on her plans for her life after The Hills. [LA Times]
• "It's kind of like a self-aware observational comedy of the simplest thing in the world, which isn't so simple." — Bob Saget on his new show, Surviving Suburbia. [NY Daily News]
• "People will always say that I'm over-exposed and that's what I want, all this attention. That's not it. What I love is the art of it all." — Miley Cyrus. [NY Daily News]
• "Somebody said to me 'Well, you know what? You just got such a big mouth and you just know how to talk to people. Did you ever think about runnin' for president?' I said 'I think we've had enough boobs in the White House.'" — Dolly Parton. [CBS News]
• "Some of my best compliments are on a $15 Ross dress. Ross gets you a weird look, but I've rocked two or three good pieces from there over the years." — Rosario Dawson. [New York Mag]
• "Well, I certainly got hit on a lot. And a lotta men thought I was as silly as I looked, I guess. You know, I look like a woman but I think like a man. And in this world of business, that has helped me a lot. Because by the time they think that I don't know what's goin' on, I then got the money, and gone." — Dolly Parton. [CBS News]

A reader sent us an email, complaining about this ad, noting that the USDA stamp on the model's ass is "as though she were a piece of fruit on sale." Correction! A piece of fruit with great skin.

This Escada ad is educational. It teaches you that Escada makes the stunningly beautiful Christy Turlington look like crap.

At Jil Sander, you can never be too thin. Camera and lighting tricks are used to whittle the body down to a single leg! Even the designer refuses to have her name weighed down by an extra L.

Sorry, but Gisele's crotch is not selling me these short-shorts. Also, in case you hadn't noticed, the crotch is the new hot spot.

Gold spangled drop-crotch, for the elite.

Remember when Sheena on America's Next Top Model tried to "sell" a handbag at a photo shoot by posing with it in front of her crotch? And the judges were like, "No." And then Madonna posed almost the same way? Kate Moss is the late to the game.

People! Stop trying to make jumpsuits happen! I know Sadie likes them, I know some of you own them, but it looks like Beyoncé is wearing a full diaper. House Of Diarrhea.

Ouch.

I've been watching too much RuPaul's Drag Race, because I can't even say what I thought when I saw this. Hint: Not "sexy."

Zombies: So hot right now.

Forget the misleading language when it comes to the "microscopic" calories and "tiny" grams of fat. That freakin' cow is using a measuring tape.

So imagine the Oscar Mayer people sitting around a table, saying: Hmm, how can we make our ad more "now"? We need some "hip" lingo to throw in there. How about "blog"? That's what the young people are doing now, right? Blog? Maybe our sandwiches are bloggable? Or, uh, bloggish? Or blogworthy? Yeah, blogworthy! They're saying this, knowing full well that the sandwiches are not, in fact, blogworthy, and yet, here is the ad, ON A BLOG. What have I done?

Earlier: Androgynous Robots, Root Beer Vodka & A Fellow In A Frock: Fall's Worst Ads

[New York, NY; March 11. Image via INFdaily.com]

• While Justin Timberlake was working with Madonna on her album, Madge offered JT a B-12 shot. "She proceeds to pull a Ziploc bag of B-12 syringes out [of her purse] and says, 'Drop 'em.' I don't know what you say to that, so I immediately dropped my pants," Justin says. "She gave me a shot in my ass and looks at me and says, 'Nice top shelf.' That was one of the greatest days of my life." [People]
  
• Last night, Madonna was been inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Music. Makes the people. Come together. Music makes the bourgeoisie and the rebel. [Mirror]
  
• A source calls Lindsay Lohan's new friends "leeches." Maybe LL is used to that? CoughmommyDinacoughcough? [Page Six]
  
• Dina Lohan on her show, Living Lohan, which begins shooting on the 16th and will air around Memorial Day on E!: "Be nice to us." [Gatecrasher]
  
• "I may be Eccentric, i certainly speak my mind and am slow to put out a record i need to mean the world to ME, and im sure i am quite Nuerotic [sic] but 'Bi Polar'. Thats just slander." — Courtney Love. [Rush & Molloy]
  
• Yeah, yeah, we know. Patricia Heaton has no belly button. [TMZ]

• On her MySpace page, Brooke Hogan speaks out against her friend who had a fling with her father, Hulk Hogan: "I think she shoulda thought about what kinda press she was gonna get when she slept with her best friend's famous father . . . I think we're all seeing just exactly how karma works Christiane. Nothing you say will ever put my family back together." [Page Six]
• Superbad star Jonah Hill: Smokes his weed out of an apple bong. Just like Charlize! [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which 8-year-old son of a daytime TV personality told gossip reporters on the red carpet that he had recently come down from bed to find his famous mom drinking margaritas on the terrace? 'She told me she was going to do the dishes, but she lied to me!' the tyke complained earnestly." [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which clean-cut pop star is a jerk behind closed doors? When a top model accidentally sat on his jacket at a recording studio, the warbler sprinted over and demanded she move immediately." [Rush & Molloy]
• Britney's lawyers are trying to get Kevin Federline to pay his own legal bills; K-Fed pleads poverty — despite recently tipping a waitress $2000 on a $365 bill. Being a bad-ass baby daddy is expensive! [Rush & Molloy]
• Meanwhile, Britney may get some financial independence back: A judge ruled that Dad Jamie can give her a debit card that has a $1500 per week limit on it. [TMZ]
• American Idol alum Sanjaya appeared at a Bat Mitzvah on Long Island and sang two songs — for free. Oy. [TMZ]
• Jessica Simpson does not have her pricey hairdresser with her in Kuwait; she flew a commercial airline and not a private jet, and she is staying in the barracks. "She has significantly scaled back her entourage," he rep says. Just so you know. [People]
• Project Runway winner Christian Siriano says the Saturday Night Live skit in which Amy Poehler does an impression of him was "SO FUNNY. The hair was absolutely perfect. I don't think I could have done it better myself. It was fierce!" [People]
• Mark Ronson will notbe DJing Suri Cruise's second birthday party. "That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard." [ONTD]
• Aww! Emma Watson, aka Hermione Granger, has a new boyfriend. "We've only been going out together for three weeks, but it's brilliant at the moment." [Mirror]
• Uh, this paper claims Jennifer Aniston has dumped her man, Brian Bouma, a crew member on a film she was working on. Did you even know they were seeing each other? Wasn't she with Jason Lewis? [Mirror]
• James McAvoy says Angelina Jolie was rough with him in their new film, Wanted: "She kicked seven colors of poo out of me but, thankfully, I'm still in one piece." [Mirror]
• "Cheeky" photographs of Gisele Bundchen and Kate Moss are being auctioned off. And by cheeky we mean naked. [The Sun]
• HBO has ordered 13 episodes of The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency, a show based on the best-selling books. Singer Jill Scott stars! [Concrete Loop]
• Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch is in ruins. The Ferris wheel has rusted, the mansion has broken windows and the paint is peeling. The perfect set for a horror film! [The Sun]
• Rosie O'Donnell and Kathy Griffin made a video where they talk about Barbara Walters, lube, Helen Mirren, etc. [Perez Hilton]
• Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis is free. He's out of a Nevada jail and headed to Florida, where he'll face charges related to filming underaged girls. [USA Today]
• Janet Jackson is co-writing a book about her journey as an "emotional eater." Um, yay? [Reuters]
• Tori Spelling has a book, too! It's called Stori Telling, of course. She talks about her nose job, boob job, a passionless marriage and trouble with her mother. Also: When her dad died, she only got $800,000 of his estimated $500 million fortune. [USA Today]
• Van Halen continues to postpone shows as Eddie Van Halen continues to undergo tests for an undislosed medical condition. [Reuters]
• Gene Simmons: Bald. [Seriously OMG WTF]

• Lily Allen's been seeing a shrink? Good for her. [The Sun]
• Dannielynn Birkhead, 18 months old, has officially been declared the sole heir to Anna Nicole Smith's estate. If the court battle involving Smith's late husband's fortune is ever settled, Dannielynn could get millions! [TMZ]
• Scarlett Johansson: Moving in with Ryan Reynolds? [Rush & Molloy]
• Linda Hogan is claiming that Hulk Hogan is using their son Nick to deliver messages about the divorce. Kids are always caught in the middle! [TMZ
• A New York City restaurant with cameras in its "private room" has caught stars like Diddy, Sienna Miller, Tom Brady and Gisele "frolicking" on video, but a rep says the tapes get deleted, shizzle. [Page Six]
• Salma Hayek loves her 6-month-old daughter but "I wanted a boy," she says. "There is always conflict between mothers and daughters. But now that she's here, I'm so happy she's a girl. And I can't imagine there ever being conflict between us, because I'm in a state of innocence where I love everything she does." Eh, just wait until she's 17. [Page Six]
• Does Kimora Lee Simmons have a contract rider for personal appearances that requires someone to refill her champagne glass if it gets below one inch? Will she only drink Fiji water? Do places have to provide fans that blow on her in case it gets hot? [Page Six]
• Is twice rehabbed Pat O'Brien being dropped from The Insider? [Page Six]
• Chace Crawford, aka Gossip Girl's Nate: Spotted partying with JC Chasez in Las Vegas. [Page Six]
• Ryder Robinson, son of Kate Hudson and Chris Robinson, was in Miami Beach when he got into an elevator that reeked of booze and cigarettes. "It smells like Daddy's concert!" the 4-year-old proclaimed. [Page Six]
• A guest at the Real Housewives Of New York City party was heard saying: "These women do not represent New York. This show is a joke." [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which actress went into rehab only after she suffered a miscarriage? She was on a four-day cocaine bender when she lost the baby she didn't even know she was carrying." [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which red-carpet couple will finally have someone to talk to now that they're new parents? The Hollywood pair are so strange and reclusive, 'they have no other friends.'" [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which super-star mommy cut a PR deal with the private hospital in which she gave birth to cut down on the costs of her VIP suite?" [Gatecrasher]
• Oh, now Barack Obama is not attending opening night of Cat On A Hot Tin Roof. Boo. [Gatecrasher]
• Emma Thompson's "adopted" Rwandan son thinks Brits are obsessed with the "pathetic celebrity culture." Smart guy! [Daily Mail]
• Daniel Baldwin is working on becoming an interventionist? Really? [TMZ]
• Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo, hot-spot hopping in New York, blah blah blah, yawn. [People]
• David Hernandez, who danced nekkid before becoming an American Idol finalist, won't be kicked off the show because, producers say, "We're never judgmental about what people do to earn a living." And hey, being ogled in the buff probably prepared him for the competition! [People]
• "Millions of fans" are supporting Jennifer Aniston in "internet chat rooms" and "fan sites" after she didn't get a chance to confront Brad and Angelina at an Oscar party, sez this paper. Sure, sure. Whatever. [Daily Express]
• Sandra Bernhard is in the new issue of Vanity Fair and her girlfriend just happens to the a publicist for the mag, interesting. [Radar]
• Lil' Jon has a winery??? Jon is offering his own Merlot, Chardonnay and Cabernet Sauvignon in slick black bottles. From crunk to classy! [Ad Age]
• Mariah Carey says she's not ready to be a mom. "It's hard enough to have a puppy." Word. [MSNBC]
• Cruz Beckham, in a Batman suit. That kid is destined for stardom. [Daily Mail]

• The mother of singer Brandy Norwood says that when Kim Kardashian was a stylist, she made unauthorized purchases on Brandy's credit card (and gave the card number to her siblings!), racking up over $120,000 in charges. Hey, bandage dresses ain't cheap! [People]
  
• In Britney news, the lawyer her father has retained tried to issue a restraining order against Sam Lutfi, but Lutfi wouldn't open the door. [TMZ]
  
• Her father wants the lawyers representing Britney in her custody battle — the firm of Trope and Trope — off the case, since they have a good relationship with Sam Lutfi. [TMZ]
  
• It seems that Lutfi spoke to Britney over the weekend, even though that violates the restraining order. [People]
  
• This UK paper is reporting that Britney is in a padded room, and Adnan can't get in to visit her. [The Sun]
  
• A court-ordered psychiatrist will examine Britney to determine if she understands the legal proceedings she is involved in. The court will decide how much longer her assets will remain under the temporary control of her father. [Reuters]

• Meanwhile, Jamie Lynn Spears wants to move from Louisiana to L.A. — away from her mother. [MSNBC]
• Andy Samberg and musician Joanna Newsom: It's on. Didn't know Andy had a girlfriend, sniff! [PageSix.com]
• Patrick Swayze had "serious gastro-intestinal" surgery over the weekend; a source says he is recovering. He'll live to dirty dance again! [PageSix.com]
• Jerry Hall is the "Global Ambassador" for Levitra? Mick Jagger's ex is touring the world encouraging women to talk about erectile dysfunction. Shudder. [PageSix.com]
• Mariah Carey was uncomfortable getting "uglied up" for her role in new flick Tennessee. She doesn't look so bad on the poster — doesn't she know what de-glamming did for Charlize Theron? [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which husband of a daytime TV fixture - who has been in trouble for his proclivities before - has lately been patronizing a midtown dungeon?" [Gatecrasher]
• Michael Jackson will appear onstage at the Grammy awards this weekend. You know you wanna know what he looks like. [Rush & Molloy]
• Entourage star Kevin Connolly: Seen grinding on the dance floor with Laguna Beach alum Kristin Cavallari. Hollywood is such a merry-go-round. [Rush & Molloy]
• Justin Timberlake in the doghouse with Jessica Biel? After rumors surfaced that he made out with Kate Hudson and some other chick, she feels she can't trust him. Or so says a source. [MSNBC]
• Actress Shell Kepler, who played gossipy nurse Amy Vining on General Hospital for years, has died, though the cause of death is unknown. She was 49. [AP]
• It's not unusual? Kitschy singer Tom Jones has insured his chest hair for £3.5 million. Rowr! [Mirror]
• George Clooney says Hollywood has lost its sparkle: He places the glory years between 1964 and 1976, with films made by Stanley Kubrick, Francis Ford Coppola, Martin Scorsese, Alan J. Pakula and Sidney Lumet. "They don't make those films anymore," he sighs. Poor Georgie. [Telegraph]
• Heath Ledger's family is back home in Australia, preparing for the funeral later this week. Heath will be buried in the family plot, near his grandparents. [News.com.au]
• Meanwhile, the inhabitants of Heath's hometown of Perth, Australia are not happy about all the drug rumors. "If a person dies, let him go in peace," one woman says. [Yahoo News]
• PETA is not happy that Lindsay Lohan has been wearing fur. Will she join Mary-Kate and Ashley as a major target? [PETA2]
• It was reported that Gisele said she would run naked through Times Square if the Giants beat boyfriend Tom Brady's Patriots in the Super Bowl. Her agent claims she never said it and asks, "What's wrong with the world?" Um, people want to see Gisele naked, is that wrong? [People]
• Oooh, a preview of Kanye West's book! It's filled with Kanye-isms like "Be leery of the free gift bag" and "When you're so focused on what you don't have — you won't have." Nothing about walking around in shutter-lensed glasses, but it sounds fun. [LA Times]
• Diddy is dredging up his voting initiative from 2004, but instead of "Vote or Die" he's just saying "Go vote." Sean John Combs adds, "If we want to stop the war, if we want to get the economy better, I think that young people need to understand they have to take matters into their own hands." He doesn't endorse a candidate but calls the race "exciting." [USA Today]
• Avril Lavigne was holding auditions for backup dancers but canceled plans after reports that she pays below the standard industry rate. Avril, a cheapsk8? [Perez Hilton]

• Tomorrow night the new Bravo show Make Me A Supermodel premieres. It's hosted by Niki Taylor and Tyson Beckford, the latter of whom is um not exactly humble:"I used to shut the malls down. I was ahead of my time. I made the model a celebrity. It wasn't the celebrity that made the model but the model that made the celebrity. I used to pack kids into a mall and that's the frenzy I want to create with this show." Um, we were kind of more excited about Niki? [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Seriously, we can't tell Penelope Cruz apart from her sister Monica in their new ads for Mango. But whatever, they both look fucking gorgeous. [Daily Mail]
  
• Is D-Squared the new Dolce & Gabbana when it comes to borderline offensive ads? The Italian design house's spring ads feature female models in lieu of where crash test dummies should appear. [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Wildly unacceptable fashion licensing deal of the day: John Lennon accessories. First up, neckties. Next: Boxers. Not kidding! [NME]

• Poor Dmitry Prut: Designed the logo for Nicky Hilton's clothing line in exchange for a little free press for his Miami art gallery, only Hilton forgot to ever mention that he designed the logo. Whoops. [Page Six]
• Lagerfeld-designed Fendi toys! [Fashion Week Daily]
• Gisele + Versace = Toned-down sophistication?! Whoda thunk? [Fashion Week Daily]
• Christy Turlington is back at work as the face of Chanel bags for spring 2008. [Sassybella]
• The fashion industry has its grumpy pants on now that the Golden Globes have been cancelled: However will they get tons of free advertising now?! [WSJ]
• The latest in free trade: Jewelry! [Reuters]
• In some sort of perverse thank you, the Spice Girls will be attending the menswear runway show on Monday in Milan of Roberto Cavalli, who designed their god-awful costimes on their current tour. [WWD, 1st item]
• British everything-under-the-sun store Marks & Spencer's isn't doing so well profit-wise, after having worked really, really hard to up their fashion ante. So they're going to stop paying so much money to Lily Cole and other models and instead are going to shift their focus to food. [Vogue UK]
• Designer Zang Toi's computer got hacked and an email got sent to everyone in his address book saying he was inviting them to join the hot new (faux) social networking site Gayguyschat.com. Who knew hackers could be fashion-obsessed queens? [Daily Mail]

• Despite toiling for so many years educating Americans on the merits of croc-skin bags on a certain premium cable TV show, Kim Cattrall says she has seen the PETA light: she's donating all the furs she wore in making the SATC movie to the animal rights organization so they can be donated to homeless people who no one will ever mistake for trendsetting style icons. There's just one flaw in that plan, and we think you might know what it is. [Page Six]
  
• Spanx is getting into the business of making bras. Shudder. [FabSugar]
  
• Gisele is the latest model to think she's a fashion designer. Ms. Bundchen's collection will be in stores in March 2008, but she didn't do it alone (surprise, surprise) — she's partnered with an obscure little duo known as Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabbana. [Vogue UK]
  
• Gucci will release a limited edition collection in honor of the Beijing Olympics. Wonder if anyone will follow up with a "Genocide Olympics" line? Yeah, probably not. [WWD, sub req'd]

• Why was Colin Farrell wearing Juicy Couture at the screening of his new film (directed by Woody Allen) the other night? "I got it for free. My personal style is quick." [Fashion Week Daily]
• French Vogue's Carine Roitfeld is being honored by amFAR this January for her philanthropic efforts to fight AIDS. We always knew she was a hooker with a heart of gold! [Fashion Week Daily]
• Pastel-colored condom compacts: Oy. [Sassybella]
• Leather jacket experts Belstaff: Costumed not only Steve McQueen way back when, but also Will Smith for I am Legend and Johnny Depp for Sweeney Todd. We will take an excuse to write about dreamy Johnny Depp. [Vogue UK]
• The latest pursuit by Donna Karan's holistic health care organization the Urban Zen Initiative: a celebrity DJ-created mix tape, natch. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Oh no! The writer's strike might mean celebs may not want to attend the big awards shows this winter like the Oscars and the Golden Globes? Which means that designers houses won't be able to tactfully loan out their garb to the pretty stars and get lots of free advertising? Well if that's not a reason to care now about the poor writers, we don't know what is. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Jade Jagger, Katharine Hamnett, the Scissor Sisters, Rihanna and Timbaland are amongst the celebs to join forces in creating yet another celeb-clothing-line-with-a-cause: Fashion Against AIDS. The line will be sold at H&M and 25% of the proceeds actually go to charity. [Vogue UK]
• Target: Sorta doesn't give a shit about Christmas this ear. No special decorations, no special merchandise. Bah Humbug. [WWD, sub req'd]

• Gisele's agent on that whole "anything but dollars" scandal: "She is based in America, pays her bills in America. She, like anyone else who lives in America, doesn't feel the fluctuation of the dollar until she goes shopping in Paris. She is pretty much here all the time and doesn't feel the difference." Well, now we're convinced. [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Cavalli for H&M goes in-stores today, and you can be prepared for a full report if we do not get trampled. [Vogue UK]
  
• Marc Jacobs did not have a sex change operation. [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• British Harper's Bazaar has released their list of best-dressed women of 2007. The top 10: 1. Natalia Vodianova (model), 2. Thandie Newton (actress), 3. Agyness Deyn (model), 4. Helen Mirren (actress), 5. Lily Allen (singer), 6. Emily Blunt (actress), 7. J. K. Rowling (author), 8. Anouck Lepere (model), 9. Irina Lazareanu (model), 10. Kate Moss (model). Um, really? [FabSugar]

• Our love for Isaac Mizrahi continues to grow: He is set to narrate a new production of Peter and the Wolf being performed at the Guggenheim Museum next month in a collaboration between the New York City Opera and Juilliard. And the show is going to be open to the public. And the tickets only cost $35. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Polo expects to do sucky during the next fiscal quarter. They blame the economy. We blame the fact that they haven't really had a new idea in 20 years. [You mean making your logo the size of a HAND doesn't count as design innovation?? -Moe] [WWD, sub req'd]
• Alberta Ferretti, the designer behind the hyper-femme label Philosophy di Alberta Ferretti, is now going to design an activewear line! And she's naming it PHILO-sophy. Which sounds not active but pretty damn lazy to us. [WWD, sub req'd]
• BlackBook magazine is normally pretty retarded. But their idea to style female models as Karl Lagerfeld, John Galliano, Viktor & Rolf, Vivienne Westwood, Anna Piaggi and our idol Carine Roitfeld is just so awesome. We're suckers for shit like this. Especially when it pays homage to Karl and Carine, all at the same time! [WWD, 5th item]
• Oh, goody, Anya "I am not Dating A Fag" Hindmarch is "expanding her brand." We wish her all the success of Von Dutch, Uggs and Crocs in proving she is so much more than her one ludicrously popular item! [Fashion Week Daily]
• Menswear designer Paul Smith is the only retailer you can turn to if you want to purchase the exclusive, limited edition book by Geoff MacCormack My Travels with Bowie, about his, well, you get the point. We heart Bowie. And so Paul Smith just earned some major street cred in our book. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Sister-of-Jackie-Kennedy-Onassis Lee Radizwell was the Director of Special Events for Armani back inher day. Who knew? [Sassybella]
• Louis Vuitton got all progressive and used a model in its Resort advertising campaign. Oh no! However will Scarlett Johansson survive? [Sassybella]