Girls - Jezebel

posts about #girls more →
"You Should Play Basketball!"
NY Times Magazine Explores "The Daughter Deficit"
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Is Calling Detained Adult Journalists "Girls" A Calculated Move?
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"I Am A Princess" And, Apparently, A Narcissist
Are Kids' Toy Preferences Hardwired?
Boys Have It Worse, Says Psychologist
Sorry, Larry Summers: Math Gender Gap Caused By Culture, Not Biology

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girl.of.your.dreams
10/16/09

In reply to "You Should Play Basketball!"
A college friend of mine was on The Price is Right. He's a black guy, about 6'5", and barely fit in frame next to Bob Barker. The only question BB had for him: "So... do you play basketball?" #onion
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PaintedTrollop
10/16/09

In reply to "You Should Play Basketball!"
I'm 6'. I hated basketball. My daughter is 6'4" and always loathed team sports. Her high school experience was made even more torturous by the coaches who chased her in the hallways and the constant questioning, "do you play basketball?" I had to hear the question from other parents, who always responded, "too bad" when I said she didn't play. I learned, when I got the question to answer by asking, "Are your short children circus performers?" Just because we're tall doesn't obligate us to do "tall things," any more than being short obligates men to become little Napoleons. #onion
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bowleserised
10/16/09

@PaintedTrollop: She needs one of these: [www.tallgirls.co.uk]

I had to deal with numerous gym teachers assuming I could run fast too, at 5ft11, but luckily they never suggested netball, as my lack of coordination was evident... #onion
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PaintedTrollop
10/16/09

@bowleserised: Ha! I had a shirt made for her one year that said, "I don't play basketball. Not a model." #onion
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whynotshesaid
10/16/09

In reply to "You Should Play Basketball!"
The other tall girl I work with asked me the other day if I played basketbal and volleyball in high school. I did, and she did too, and we both admit we were recruited for the teams because of our height. #onion
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morninggloria
10/16/09

In reply to "You Should Play Basketball!"
I'm average to a little tall-ish, and I played high school basketball (mostly because my dad was a superathlete in high school and he would have been very disappointed had I not played). I was the captain my senior year, and started at point guard until I started calling the coach out on his stupid play calling. He benched me. The team lost every game for the rest of the season and for the following two seasons. My mom called it "(real name)'s Curse." #onion
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BearDownCBears
10/16/09

@morninggloria: You were a captain and you have a curse? Man, if you got like scurvy or fleas or syphilis you could go full-pirate. #onion
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Cerridwen
10/16/09

@morninggloria: I got sucked into volleyball due to my father's glory days of superathleticism. In fact, he used to play with my old coach. Ah, parents and their misplaced expectations... #onion
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morninggloria
10/16/09

@BearDownCBears: What makes you think I don't have syphilis? #onion
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o-line
10/16/09

In reply to "You Should Play Basketball!"
So funny. I was asked to join a work basketball team today. No one asked if I played, they just assumed that I did because I am a girl giant. Like I signed a contract the devil to play sports and get things off the top shelf for ladies in the grocery store if he'd make me taller.

Like many others here, my above-average height peaked at an early age. I was guilted into playing as a kid until all of the other girls caught up and eventually exceeded me in height (and in skill). Basketball is vicious.
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Edited by o-line at 10/16/09 11:58 AM o-line was starred o-line was unstarred

Zombie Ms. Skittles
10/16/09

@o-line: Like I signed a contract the devil to play sports and get things off the top shelf for ladies in the grocery store if he'd make me taller.

Awesome. I might use this if anymore old men try to convince me that height = sports ability. #onion
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highjump
10/16/09

@o-line: Is jezebel secretly a community for talls? On other posts I've noticed a lot ot tall people speaking up. We should conduct a spurious relationship study on height and feminism. #onion
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o-line promoted this comment highjump was starred highjump was unstarred

o-line
10/16/09

@highjump: Is jezebel secretly a community for talls?

There are a lot of Jezetalls. We should form a basketball team! #onion
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jigglyball
10/16/09

@o-line: I was 5'8" by about eighth grade, and I finally went to basketball camp that summer to shut everyone up. Above average height simply couldn't fix: my two left feet when it came to running plays, my inability to dribble and walk at the same time, and my utter mystification that people can actually shoot the ball with two hands (this has frustrated many ex-boyfriends who are just sure that I could be really good if I tried). #onion
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Katxyz
10/16/09

In reply to "You Should Play Basketball!"
My tall friend gets asked about basketball, volleyball, tennis and modeling.

I try to muster up as much sympathy as I can from my 5 foot form, but my shoulder is far to low for her to cry on.
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Edited by Katxyz at 10/16/09 11:55 AM Katxyz was starred Katxyz was unstarred

Le Kangourou de Kataroo
10/16/09

@Katxyz: I'm 5'10" and still get asked these on a regular basis. I usually tell them I don't play ball sports, as anyone who has watched me try can attest to. #onion
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Cerridwen
10/16/09

@Katxyz: Replace tennis with rowing and that's me. #onion
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winner
10/16/09

In reply to "You Should Play Basketball!"
Am I the only one here who actually DID say "ok?" To both basketball and volleyball.

I was in the courtyard, freshman year of high school, with no friends (just moved to Texas from S. Africa) and the basketball coach saw me standing there and begged me to follow him. He asked if I had ever played basketball and I said "yes" (I had, but not, like, real basketball) and he asked what position I played and I said "defense." He frowned. That was the beginning of a beautiful relationship with Texas high school athletics (basketball, volleyball AND cross country). A relationship that would get me a nearly full ride to an Ivy League school (where I decided I preferred rowing). #onion
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run_sunshine
10/16/09

@winner: The Ivies don't give out athletic scholarships. What kind of full ride were you offered? #onion
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whynotshesaid
10/16/09

@winner: I said yes, to all of the sports teams I was recruited for (v-ball, b-ball and track). I was really terrible at all of the sports, but I don't regret playing on the teams. Some of my best high school memories directly result from playing team sports - sleepovers, bus rides to cities two hours away, actually making it to the state championship one year which meant we got to stay in hotel rooms...good times, yo. Good times. #onion
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winner
10/16/09

@run_sunshine: Sorry - need-based from the school and private scholarships based on merit / extra-curriculars. #onion
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winner
10/16/09

@whynotshesaid: I will always be a fan of long bus rides. Especially if they get me out of work early. Which doesn't exactly ever happen. #onion
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Cerridwen
10/16/09

@winner: I said yes to volleyball. And I rue the day I ever did. #onion
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Kivrin
10/16/09

In reply to "You Should Play Basketball!"
That happens to really tall guys, too. My university has had quite a few 7'+ players who obviously made the team based only on the possibility that having such a player under the basket with his arms up might result in an accidental block.
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Edited by Kivrin at 10/16/09 11:41 AM Kivrin was starred Kivrin was unstarred

JessickerFletcher
10/16/09

In reply to "You Should Play Basketball!"
It's okay, I regularly tell my under-five-foot neighbor that being a jockey is really his only option. #onion
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Zombie Ms. Skittles
10/16/09

In reply to "You Should Play Basketball!"
I can relate too. I never took them up on it because I have the hand-eye coordination of a gerbil, but as a kid (I was 5'9 at 13) I was constantly being nagged about joining basketball teams.

Hell, last year (when I was 22!!!) an old man at the grocery store almost made me cry because he kept INSISTING that I should be playing basketball despite my assertions that I'm really, really bad at it.
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Edited by Zombie Ms. Skittles at 10/16/09 11:36 AM

pursedangler
10/16/09

@Zombie Ms. Skittles: Oh, and I'm sure he thought he was paying you a great compliment! Which, he probably was in his mind, but...I hate stuff like that. #onion
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Zombie Ms. Skittles
10/16/09

@pursedangler: His wife looked really, really embarrassed (probably because I was about to cry). I kept explaining that I'm not THAT tall in the basketball scheme of things ("But you're tall for a lady!") and that I don't like basketball and am not very good at it.

They obviously forgot to hand me my basketball talent at the tall clinic. #onion
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highjump
10/16/09

@Zombie Ms. Skittles: The onion article also brings up volleyball. Did you get this one too?

The only sport I was ever decent at was soccer (you only have to use one set of limbs!) where height is a handicap. Unless you consider colorguard a sport (I do) because I kicked ass at that. #onion
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Zombie Ms. Skittles
10/16/09

@highjump: No, and I was actually not bad at volleyball. But I played rec league and they were all about the basketball there.

My favorite was when some guys asked if I'd ever thought about going on America's Next Top Model. It was a nice change from basketball. #onion
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highjump
10/16/09

@Zombie Ms. Skittles: Good for you, volleyball is hard! At leat for me; when forced to play in gym my serves regularly hit my teammates in the back of the head.

ANTM/ 'you should model' is a nice change of pace. My angle for getting on the show would be to fill the smart girl who is too good for this role. Then I would have a breakdown during panel about 3 epsiodes in declaring how wrong I was. #onion
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pursedangler
10/16/09

@Zombie Ms. Skittles: Malpractice! #onion
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Zombie Ms. Skittles
10/16/09

@highjump: The thing is, I'm 5'9. Modeling is a realistic career at my height. Professional basketball is not unless you've got a lot of natural skill and trained very hard.

Neither of those really apply to pudgy slow girls.
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Edited by Zombie Ms. Skittles at 10/16/09 11:59 AM

flexanimous
08/21/09

In reply to NY Times Magazine Explores "The Daughter Deficit"
What's crazy is that girls are devalued because they want boy-babies, but who's going to have those boy-babies if there aren't any women???
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Armed with Vitriol
08/21/09

In reply to NY Times Magazine Explores "The Daughter Deficit"
Unfortunately, I see this kind of thinking in the United States as well (though to a much less extreme extent). I can't tell you how many moms have told me how happy they are they had boys because girls are high maintenance and girls are this and girls are that. I really want to slap moms who say stupid shit like that. The only reason a girl would be more high maintenance than a boy is if you raise her to be some bitchy little prima donna, which so many parents do. It has nothing to do with sex, but how you raise the kid. And if you have a preconceived notion in your head that sons are better than daughters, you're probably going to find reasons to value a son more than a daughter. It's called self fulfilling propechy, dipshits.
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wtfox?! promoted this comment Edited by Armed with Vitriol at 08/21/09 2:12 PM Armed with Vitriol was starred

rah29
08/21/09

@Cherry Blossom Girl: I've heard things like that too and I can't get my head around it. You;re dead on about the self-fulfilling prophecy aspect too. Can you blame girls for acting out in homes where their brothers are doted on and they're treated--however subtly and unconsciously--as second best?

I guess I'm lucky; both my mum and my dad have said repeatedly they're so happy to have had two girls (my mother insists she should have started earlier and had two more). They both think of boys as more difficult. And maybe it's a cultural thing, but my mum always insists that family traditions and heritage are passed through daughters rather than sons. I can see where she comes from on that--in my experience too it's always daughters and mums on the phone to each other, visiting, raising each others' kids, dragging their husbands behind them.
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funzette
08/21/09

In reply to NY Times Magazine Explores "The Daughter Deficit"
rates of suicide in china and india for women are among the highest in the world.

i know that one doesn't cause the other, but it's heartbreaking and complicated and not unrelated.
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fallingstandards
08/21/09

In reply to NY Times Magazine Explores "The Daughter Deficit"
I can't say that I'm happy to see the word "foeticide" on a site that's typically so pro-choice. I'm certainly not supporting gender-selective abortions, but vilifying that as akin to murder seems...inconsistent with a lot of other editorial content on this site. I'm hoping this was just a term you carelessly pulled from one of the cited sources, or is being used to refer exclusively to those unfortunate women who are, against their will, injured in an attempt to induce abortion or fetal death.
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LatoyaPeterson
08/21/09

@fallingstandards: We were of two minds on that one. Yes, I agree, foeticide dances awfully close to the language of anti-choicers. On the other hand, the word is normally employed to express the enormity of the situation - we are talking about millions and millions of girls. I dropped the qualifier "gender-specific" in front of the term, but I'll discuss with Anna about the language to use when covering this issue in the future.
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queenjulie
08/21/09

@LatoyaPeterson: Latoya, thanks for replying to @falling standards! I love reading a news site (yes, I consider Jez a news site, and a better one by far then CNN.com or any of the other mainstream ones) where the writers actually think about what they're writing, think about the specific words they use and their connotations and denotations, and put actual effort into being clear, intelligent, original, and to the point. You guys are just truly awesome.
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fallingstandards
08/21/09

@LatoyaPeterson: I appreciate the response, and am glad to hear that you guys did think through the usage before including it in the post. As queenjulie and I both noted, there are connotations that would make us feel more comfortable with its use (e.g., indicating a lack of agency or true choice on the woman's part, or the intrusion of external forces), and I realize that there are some cultural distinctions in how the term has been used historically. I appreciate that you clarified the intent, but I do still have a very strong, visceral reaction to "foeticide." Then again (and perhaps more importantly), I also have a very strong, visceral reaction to the topic of the post on a whole. "Missing girls" is a very real issue with wide ranging societal and demographic repercussions, and a great one to post on this blog for discussion. Your guest blogging has been great.
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Edited by fallingstandards at 08/21/09 3:18 PM fallingstandards was starred fallingstandards was unstarred

rickinsthelens
08/21/09

In reply to NY Times Magazine Explores "The Daughter Deficit"
Don't worry. When all of these baby boys grow up and have now women to marry, they will be sent off to a war which will kill them off, thus equalizing the population balance. Oh, wait. . . maybe that's not the best answer either.
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charliekohler
08/21/09

@rickinsthelens: When China first passed the One Child rule (and women were aborting females to have males), my immediate thought was: who on earth are those guys going to marry? They're going to have to find a wife outside of China. At the time, I didn't know much about heteronormativity, but I'm still wondering.
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Hiroine Protagonist
08/21/09

@charliekohler: This was actually a serious discussion in my Security Studies class - the app. 300 000 Chinese men who will be coming of age with no prospect of a similarly aged Chinese wife. Large groups of young men with no chance of domestic bliss = major increase in martial behaviour and armies. They're a destabilizing force.
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