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fulanita
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
Britney doesn't work for the first BI. I can't see anyone considering her a "working-class band."

Obvious choice for the second is Jessica/Ashlee- but at this point who is the more famous of the two? Who is subbing for whom?
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t-yo3
05/23/09

@fulanita: I'm thinking Gwen Stefani. I was thinking Fergie at first, as the other female pop-star who's also had fame with a band (although I don't know if BEP are really a band), but the "working-class" thing lines up with No Doubt and their bit about being regular kids from Orange County and all that.
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fulanita
05/23/09

@titilayo-yo-yo-yo: True, but is she an aging pop star? The BI doesn't specify male or female, I don't think. I was thinking maybe Bon Jovi or similar.
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t-yo3
05/23/09

@fulanita: You're right, it doesn't, don't know why I assumed a woman. And Gwen is aging (aren't we all) but she's not "once-hot", she's "still-hot". Hmmm, I don't know then. Is Bon Jovi working on a new album these days?
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la.donna.pietra
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
I have a theory that Mr. Pattinson walked up to the first reasonably attractive non-brunette* he saw in front of a camera at Cannes and whispered, "Please help me kill this rumor about me and Kristen Stewart being OMG SECRET LOVERS?" Please? Right now? I'll be *so* grateful."

I like this theory. It helps that I am blonde.

*If she was brunette, then People et al. would be all "BUT HE MUST STILL BE IN LOVE WITH BELL--OOPS, KRISTEN! SEE! HE'S EVEN GOING FOR GALS WHO LOOK LIKE HER!"
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hippichx sez PEACE PLEASE
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
that twilight guy seems to be growing into the creepy hollywood stereotype really quickly. something about the look in his eyes, i don't know if he is trying to play up the vampire thing, but i wouldn't want to get to close to him...
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Bunsen Honeydew
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
He's an attractive guy, but he has a weird edge to his facial expressions that creeps me out. I think it's his demeanor that is most bothersome.

That said, he gives great and hilarious interviews.
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Bunsen Honeydew
05/23/09

@Bunsen Honeydew: @rhoswhen: eppp the below comment was to you. I totally fail at commenting this morning.
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Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
I'm confused by this BI because it seems as though at least 3 BIs are going on at once.

If I split it apart, I'd think:

For the first part: Whitney Houston - but the working-class rock band thing doesn't make sense.

The next part: Maybe Solange and Beyonce. But probs Ashlee and Jessica.
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rhoswhen
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
Am I the only one who thinks Robert Pattinson is frightening and not sexy in the least? If that man approached me in a bar, I'd screech like a chimp and run far, far away.
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roodles
05/23/09

@rhoswhen: nope, I concur. He always looks dirty, first of all. And his interviews are absolutely NUTS. and not in an interesting tortured artist way but a "i'm consciously cultivating this too cool for fame indie persona". It's annoying.
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TheExperience
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
I do NOT miss the days of adolescence, when seeing the celebrity love of your LIFE with another woman caused you to spend at least a week blubbering into your Tiger Beat and feeling like the world is ending.
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whynotshesaid
05/23/09

@TheExperience: Yes, when I found out that Edward Furlong had a girlfriend - and that his girlfriend was his tutor, who was twice as old as him - I was DESTROYED.
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la.donna.pietra
05/23/09

@TheExperience: Oddly enough, I missed that entire stage of adolescence. Then again, the first celebrity dude I was bonkers over was George Michael, which meant I had *far* more complicated things to be considering re: him not loving me exclusively.
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CareerUnderachiever
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
I can't tell if Dan Akroyd thinks Ghostbusters 3 is real life and I think I like it that way.
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rhymeswithfeather
05/23/09

@CareerUnderachiever: I just read that article and it made me so fucking excited for GB3, because Aykroyd sounds so stoked.
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dianersb was bit by a zombie
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
Johnny, I would like to join you sitting on your porch in France. I'm really very good company. If I don't say so myself, I'm rather funny and great at conversation. I enjoy good wine and soft cheeses, so menu planning would be a snap.

I will await my invitation with baited breath.
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la.donna.pietra
05/23/09

@dianersb was bit by a zombie: My only problem with his statement is that I have extreme difficulty imagining him with a big ol' belly.
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whynotshesaid
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
I'm guessing the first BI is Bruce Springsteen, because of the whole "working class" band thing. No idea who is filling in for him, though.
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CareerUnderachiever
05/23/09

@whynotshesaid: I was thinking John Mellencamp because Springsteen is touring and I've not heard whisper of suspicion of lip-synching. And because the Boss lip-synching would mean I'd have to lose a little more faith in humanity.
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whynotshesaid
05/23/09

@CareerUnderachiever: Oh, that makes more sense. I like that one much better, if only because Mellencamp is just a watered-down version of the Boss anyway.
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ritualtheory
05/23/09

@CareerUnderachiever: Hmm...Terri Gross interviewed Mellencamp recently, and he sang a few songs in studio. While his voice was pretty rough, it was definitely serviceable.
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tscheese
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
Lady GaGa, I have a soft spot for you because you're genuinely very talented and technically skilled, and your grasp of musical theory blows most other artists out of the water. You are an actual musician, not merely a tarted-up "entertainer", and I respect that--you're very refreshing, actually, because instead of vaguely warbling the same five nasal notes into a vocoder and letting a production team take care of all the rest, you actually compose your own pieces and have a very strong, precise vocal range.

But this:

I've always been famous, it is just that nobody knew.

NO. YOU KNOCK THAT OFF RIGHT NOW. THAT'S NON SEQUITUR. STOP IT.
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Pocahaunted
05/23/09

@tscheese: I had an ex boyfriend who claimed he had always been famous, even when he was kid, just nobody knew. I think that's a pretty standard phrase for ego maniacs with narcissistic personality disorder.

However a DJ gig and cheekbones does not a famous person make, young man. And Lady GaGa, enjoy your fame because I fear it is fleeting.
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tscheese
05/23/09

@Pocahaunted: It's a shame her public image is so distorted/egotistical. I speak as someone who has spent entirely too many years of her life taking musical lessons of some kind or another: Ms. Gaga is truly one of the most genuinely talented, technically proficient pop musicians out there.

I would really like to see her do well and pave the way for other actual musicians, because honestly I'm sick of hearing about how every other vapid starlet must have a "music career" when all they do is sort of mouth three off-key notes over and over again to a Casio keyboard demo. (See: Montag, H.)

Sadly, it seems that talent isn't the deciding factor in these things. I don't mind her pantsless proclivities and kooky hair, but I wish she'd chill out on the "OH MY GOD I AM THE BEST THING EVER" front.
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Mar Charbel
05/23/09

@Pocahaunted: Because god forbid a woman make a career for herself doing what she loves and not hurting anyone else. Let's COUNTDOWN TO FAILURE.

geez people. insecure much?
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BAngieB
05/23/09

@Mar Charbel: yeah yeah blah blah
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Evie Havok
05/23/09

@BAngieB: Ha ha! You're great.
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la.donna.pietra
05/23/09

@tscheese: I can't decide if she's channeling Norma Desmond with that quote or not. I also can't decide if she's that self-aware or not.

I do know one thing for sure: "Paparazzi" is the catchiest goddamned song I have heard in a long time. It pops up in my dreams.
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Mar Charbel
05/23/09

@BAngieB: Thanks for agreeing. It is quite silly to say someone's fame is fleeting when their album is still in the top 10 over 6 months after its release.
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BAngieB
05/23/09

@Mar Charbel: Uh-oh. You misunderstood me. I was not agreeing. We are keeping it light and all that earnestness is tiring.
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mbot says Spock yeah!
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
I have been seriously bummed by the cancellations of Life and The Sarah Connor Chronicles. Those were two seriously good television programs, and both had amazing finales that left me wanting more.

On a shallower note, I will miss seeing Adam Goldberg's mustache in The Unusuals (it was 90% of the reason I ever tuned in).
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NellMood
05/23/09

@mbot: I know- I kinda liked that mustache, too. Sad.
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mbot says Spock yeah!
05/23/09

@NellMood: The mustache should really get its own show, right?!
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NellMood
05/23/09

@mbot: I'd definitely watch. I've always had a weird crush on Adam Goldberg.

@RunningCori: I don't even want to think about Pushing Daisies.
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stoprobbers
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
Dear Lady Gaga and Black Eyed Peas,

NONE OF YOU ARE ANDY WARHOL. NONE OF YOU ARE IN ANDY WARHOL'S FACTORY. WHEN ANDY WARHOL SAID EVERYONE WOULD BE FAMOUS FOR 15 MINUTES IT WAS A CRITIQUE OF MODERN SOCIETY AND CULTURE. YOU ARE TOO DUMB TO REALIZE IT. PLEASE STOP TALKING ABOUT IT, HE IS ROLLING IN HIS GRAVE AND IT IS CHAFING HIS CORPSE.

Thank you,

The General Public.
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sympathyforthebasementcat
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
Oh Hortense, you're giving me a Zack-Attack. And it feels so good.
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YourScreenplaySucks
05/23/09

In reply to Edward Cullen Breaks Your Little Sister's Heart
It is my personal belief that had the network picked up Saved By The Bell:The Adult Years, Zack Morris would be standing trial for securities fraud & money laundering for operating a multimillion dollar Ponzi scheme. He would try to get cute with the judge, who would not be having it.

Kelly, a stay-at-home mom/socialite would be consulting a divorce attorney, a celebrity Kabbalah coach for "spiritual guidance", and drinking too much in the afternoons.
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NellMood
05/23/09

@Your Screenplay Sucks:

Slater had a brief wrestling career college, but was felled by a terrible groin injury. He now coaches at Bayside high.
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NellMood
05/23/09

@NellMood: He's also in a committed relationship with Screech, and they've adopted two children from Guatemala.
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ZioZio
05/23/09

@Your Screenplay Sucks: And Lisa would get married to Martin Lawrence...oh wait she really did.
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Crackers in Bed
05/23/09

@ZioZio: wait, WHAT?
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Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC
05/23/09

@ZioZio: No, she didn't. They dated though and were engaged.
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