Jezebel 
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New York, 12:52 AM
Tue Nov 24
65 posts in the last 24 hours
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07/09/09
"My ex and I were growing apart/it wasn't anything/she was more into me than I was into her."
Amazing f*cks.
07/08/09
Mostly because I have said 1, 4, and 5 many times and meant it.
And wtf, how can you not tell if your girlfriend came, especially if you're... inside her. Stuff... moves... and yeah, you ought to be able to feel it or, I don't know, read her body language, breathing patterns, moaning? So you shouldn't have to ask if she came... or am I the only girl who makes it very, very obvious when she's "finished"? My boyfriend never has to ask. He would also be very aware if I was unsatisfied, because I am a total bitch when I'm horny.
07/08/09
07/09/09
In fact some women -- again in my limited experience -- are so good at fighting that response (due to inhibitions, religion, who knows?) that it might not appear to be anything recognizable at all, when it finally arrives.
If there's one thing I've learned from being with women, it's to appreciate variety. You just have to, if you ever want to move beyond the horny-teenager stage of one's life.
07/08/09
Ex/ Skeevy dude while I'm working at the bar "So do you have a boyfriend?"
Me "no."
Then I realize that was the perfect opportunity to LIE and I fucked it up.
I thank this askmen article for one thing...I will now use the
"I'm not ready to be in a relationship/have a boyfriend right now>" line forever.
I was recently in a situation where it would have come in handy and honestly didn't know what the fuck to say other than "I thought we were friends, and I'm not into you like that."
The not ready line is SO great. I'm all over it.
07/08/09
07/08/09
When no one is really misled, and there are good reasons for not digging into the issue right here, then I'm quite happy to leave whatever it is for later, calmer discussion.
Except maybe on a long car trip. Then you pretty much have to have it out, and "I'm not mad at you" gains you nothing.
07/08/09
07/08/09
But if you are a guy in a relationship with a woman and don't know whether or not she is having orgasms during sex (including foreplay and afterplay), awkward questions are the least of your worries.
07/08/09
07/08/09
07/08/09
The others are irrelevant, really. Maybe I just dated too many Nice Guys(TM) before I was married, but that was my major complaint. Plus, a nice catch-all, encompassing the orgasm questions. Believe me, if you did something that caused an orgasm, I'd gladly tell you.
07/09/09
He asked me why I had given him a chance, and I asked him if he wanted nice or honest. He chose honest, so I said he was pathetic and I felt sorry for him. I won no points that day, BUT IT FELT SO GOOD TO SAY IT.
07/08/09
07/08/09
07/08/09
07/08/09
5 LIES ALL WOMEN TELL:
1. "4 inches is TOTALLY average length!"
2. "My poop doesn't smell. Really!"
3. "Oh, no, I would never burp in public. What kind of woman do you think I am?"
4. "No, thanks, I don't think I have any room left for dessert!"
5. "Your mom is lovely."
07/08/09
He would also see right through number 5. He would think I was being sarcastic.
07/08/09
2. Honestly, I don't mind if a guy goes to strip clubs with his friends. Its like porn mixed with bonding. Why would I care about that?
3. I've made boys cry with my honesty surrounding why I don't want to be their girlfriend. The answer usually just is that I don't want a boyfriend, but if its something more, I'll go into why we don't click.
4. I don't like paying, but I don't mind it. Fair is fair.
5. I use compliments to reinforce good behavior. Boyfriend doesn't get showered with compliments when I don't love the sex; he does when I do. Consequently, the number of times he gets complimented on it keeps going up...
Ooops. I guess I'm not a women, huh Ask Men?
07/08/09
Im not saying my guy (if I had one) could NEVER go to one but... men who find it super fun to do with their guy friends on a regular basis aren't guys Im typically attracted to anyway.
07/08/09
07/08/09
Boobies for everyone!
07/08/09
07/08/09
07/08/09
07/08/09
07/08/09
1. I'm totally working on this Important Report and not just making shit up on Jezebel.
2. I didn't drink that entire bottle of sangiovese. I don't know what you're talking about.
3. Yes, your child is adorable and I'm glad I spent a great deal of money on it.
4. Oh, that giant clumsy bruise of mine that I got because I constantly run into shit? It doesn't hurt at all.
5. That Marilyn Monroe / Sizes Different In The Fifties thing is still hilarious and totally not getting old.
6. Ths cmmnt hs vwls n t.
07/08/09
07/08/09