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Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs

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The Queen of No
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
"I might MAKE YA sing a pretty tune!" I have never heard that. Hahahahaha. I love it. I usually just make my annoyance at blatant homophobia known with looks or just not qualifying it with any response, which I find to be effective. Scolding a grown man usually doesn't do anything except make them more prone to do it just to piss you off. I dunno.
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JinxyMcDeath
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
You know, there's certain people you call out for saying "that guy is gay" and Teresa's husband isn't one of them. You don't call those people out because their reaction is straight-up vile hatred of you. They don't go "oh, was that bad? Shit, I'll change." Instead, you make a mental note to yourself that he has issues and then you either STOP hanging out with him OR at some other later point in a casual meeting, you mention that it offended you in the most non-annoying way. I'm from the South - I have a lot of experience with these type of men.

And I don't think that Danielle helped the situation by saying "Don't talk to me like that, I'm not your wife." Although I don't think she was meaning to put down Teresa, she was insinuating that it was OK for a man to talk to his wife in a rude manner. Um, FAIL.
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Snowbunny
06/03/09

@JinxyMcDeath: Yes, this. The Midwest is full of men who still use "That's so gay" all the time and I've found that I can either get offended and call them out and ruin the event or whatever or I can just not feed into the gay bashing that results. You need to learn how to play people like that, and they clearly don't go for direct. A good method is also talking to their wives/girlfriends/mothers/sisters (casually, like when baking cookies or drinking coffee) about how annoying you think "gay" as an insult is. Because, hey, happy wife happy life and once the women close to a man tell him to stop doing it he'll probably stop.
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Notes from the underwhelmed
06/03/09

@JinxyMcDeath: Major disagree. I think that people who say such things should be publicly humiliated. They deserve it, and maybe they won't be so quick to say it the next time.
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lowkeylo
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
What does everyone think of the other women criticizing Danielle for hunting for a rich husband?

I mean, they are all living off rich husbands-- I don't see any of them working.
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Snowbunny
06/03/09

@lowkeylo: Dina has an interior design business and she also has that charity from one of the earlier episodes, Teresa just invited me to be a member of a facebook group to sell her children's accessories line, Caroline says she has a line too and I imagine she does quite a bit of work at the Brownstone. I think they all have side projects and jobs but they're lucky enough to be financially secure and get to explore their passions and interests.
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maybeimamazed02
06/03/09

@lowkeylo: Teresa has 3 little girls--two of whom don't look old enough for full-time school. That's a job right there.

Caroline definitely seems to be a full partner in the Brownstone. She strikes me as one of those moms who prefers to say "I'm just a wife and mother", but who actually work right alongside their husbands.

And Dina is an interior designer/event planner.
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JulieJewel
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
I, too...am very concerned about Theresa's lack of forehead.

There's no shame in having your hairline lifted. Jen Anniston did.
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galaxina
06/03/09

@JulieJewel: Huh?

Jesus, now we're snarking on people's HAIRLINES? What, her hands weren't veiny or her feet scary, so you had to come up with something?
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NOLA girl
06/03/09

@galaxina: How can you NOT notice that hairline? I can't stop looking at it no matter how hard I try. I've never seen anything like it.
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rednrowdy
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
if the whole show becomes "let's gang up on danielle", it is going to be incredibly boring.
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FritzIno
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
News to Teresa -

A) Your husband is not easy to get along with when he insults an entire demographic of people and a person he has chosen to take dance lessons from.

B) He is built like Sponge Bob Square Pants - a walking, talking, squat human square.

C) If he is such a buttman and loves your butt so much as you say - maybe there is deeper reason why and hence the gay comments...

D) Your kids are not cute. They are pink ruffled cretans who need to take a trip down the garbage shoot a la Willy Wonka/Veruca Salt.

E) Have that hideous hairline raised while you get a boob job...

F) I could write more but there are not enough hours in the day.
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RiotGrrrl
06/03/09

@FritzIno: A is the only comment worth submitting, the others are just snarking on his sexuality and the entire family's looks. Her kids are obviously spoiled and entitled brats but there's not reason to rag on their cuteness and telling her to get her hairline and boobs done.
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FritzIno
06/03/09

Sorry - but I take offense to that crap, having heard it way too much in my life. And truth be told - she should be calling him out on that shit - not Danielle. That's just enabling that bullshit.

And she said on the show she wanted to get her boobs done. You sign up to put yourself out there like that - you have to deal with reactions.

Just chalk up my comments to having had to fight that kind of crap continuosly for years. You learn to have a sharp bite.
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bluebears
06/03/09

@FritzIno: There is no call to snark on her appearance.
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Laulau
06/03/09

@FritzIno: There's also no need to comment on her husband's sexuality. It always bothers me (and strikes me as particularly self-undermining) when the response to a homophobe's bigoted jokes is "oh yeah? well I bet you're gay!!" It just reinforces the idea that being gay is something bad or shameful. If he's in denial about his sexuality, I pity him. Either way, he's clearly a bigot and we can all judge him plenty for that.
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annbran
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
so he wants to take dancing lessons, but makes gay slurs the whole time...he's like that one jock in high school who comments on all the other guys muscles, and follows it up with "I'm not gay!"
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PhillyLass
06/03/09

@annbran: I'd bet my rent money he didn't want to go dancing and the producers set up that scene for an opportunity to create friction among the group. And it worked.
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IBleedGlitter: The High Priestess of Tinsel
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
It also disgusted me last night when they all went over to Dina's (I think) house and literally said "We all went over there to talk about Danielle." Really ladies? You're grown-ass women! It looks like some high school habits never die.
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dj_chick
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
Teresa, seriously? How can you just smile and laugh it off when your husband is so offensive? I'm glad someone decided to tell him it's not cool to use the word 'gay' as an insult. Christ. That's the sort of thing you should only have to explain to children who don't know better.
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Maritsa
06/03/09

@dj_chick: She smiles and laughs it off because it doesn't bother her. She's just as bad as he is.

I really don't like any of them except for Jacqueline. Dina has moments where she seems OK but she is a total mean girl. Caroline is her second fiddle and I really find her kids obnoxious, especially the oldest one. Danielle would be OK - but crazy - were it not for her insistence that she deserves/needs a man to save her. That turns me off, although it's great that she stood up to Joe.
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jennebell
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
Dina & Caroline are total greaseballs, they don't give anyone a chance who isn't family - Dina is the queen bee and you can tell that Caroline hangs on her every word. I'm not digging them so much. Danielle comes off very desperate for everything, friendship, attention, etc., a bit of a sin. I think her heart is in the right place though. Those Manzo chicks are bullies.
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Trilby O'Ferrall
06/03/09

@jennebell: See, I don't think they are bullies. They don't like Danielle, but they aren't mean to her. I think they all act fairly cordial as a group, the dislike comes through in the confessional interviews later. I also think Caroline is really the Queen Bee, and that Dina and Jacqueline depend on her to help figure out their lives. I also think Jacqueline's husband is hot- he, Jamie and Dina look alike.

And yes, okay, I love Dina! I do! I'm not sure why, I just do. She's my favorite by-far.
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rednrowdy
06/03/09

@jennebell: dina creeps me out with her permanently stuck up face, and caroline is the biggest judgey mcjudgerson that ever walked the face of the earth. jacqueline is a pushover mom but at least she has some kind of depth to her. teresa is cute but her children are freaking nightmares. danielle ain't no angel, but she's definitely come a long way from her chequered past. i'm sad that she's a gold digger and is presenting that as a lifestyle to her kids, but hey - i'm not living her life.

@Trilby O'Ferrall (a.k.a. lawschoolmakesmecrazy): i think the dislike comes out when they are all sitting together in a room when danielle is away and they talk shit about her and about how much they hate her. that kind of behavior is mean and not cordial, with or without cameras rolling.
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PhillyLass
06/03/09

@Trilby O'Ferrall (a.k.a. lawschoolmakesmecrazy): Wait-- which one is Jamie?
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maybeimamazed02
06/03/09

@Trilby O'Ferrall (a.k.a. lawschoolmakesmecrazy): Love Dina's snark. Caroline is the true queen bee--she's an older sister through and through (takes one to know one). I probably wouldn't want to be her DIL (though her oldest sun is a QT Pie!), but I'd love to go to her place for dinner (that sausage and potato dish looked yummy!).
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maybeimamazed02
06/03/09

@maybeimamazed02: Son. I mean son.
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IBleedGlitter: The High Priestess of Tinsel
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
One thing that I noticed in last nights episode is that no one in "The family" (Dina, Caroline, etc) ever says "our family" they always refer to it as "the family". Especially Jaqueline when she's all like "oooh no the family will be mad if I have friends outside the family". It's weird.
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stacyinbean
06/03/09

@IBleedGlitter: The High Priestess of Tinsel: It doesn't really help the whole 'our family has no attachment to organized crime' schtick they're working on!
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Dictator for Life
06/03/09

@IBleedGlitter: The High Priestess of Tinsel: I noticed that too. It was like Jacqueline was speaking in capital letters -- "The Family."
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BabyJane
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
I gave Danielle points last night for standing up to Theresa's husband after he made the gay remarks. I also gave Danielle points for being genuinely concerned about the way that the rumors about her could impact her children. That having been said, I still think she's a bit of a drama queen and frankly, she scares me a little.

Dina is just coming off as a total mean girl. Her daughter looks a little bit like like Tina Fey to me and I had to laugh about the whole water park/Cypress thing.

I liked Theresa, but she was awfully quick to jump on the Caroline/Dina bandwagon last night, so I'm rethinking my position on her.

Caroline made a bigger deal out of Cha Cha Goldfish dancing with her son then she needed to.
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freckles
06/03/09

@BabyJane: Danielle cares about her kids, but she is clearly mixed up. If you care that much about your kids, GET A FUCKING JOB. Shit. Don't wait for a rich man to marry so he pay your bills. What example are you setting for your children? Also, Danille bringing creepo 25 year old guys around her kids? Come the fuck on. That's just wrong. In 18 years of my mom being divorced from my dad, I met one guy she went out with, and it's only because it was serious (and he was her age). You don't bring your fuck buddy around your kids.
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BabyJane
06/03/09

@freckles: I completely agree with you and trust me, I have no intentions of signing her up for mother of the year. Other than what I wrote about her being genuinely emotional about her kids and standing up to Theresa's husband on that one matter, I have nothing else good to say about her.
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Laulau
06/03/09

@BabyJane: I thought Caroline's reaction was just another instance of "blame the woman". Danielle seemed like she was being inappropriate but - your son is in his 20s. He has a college degree. He can make his own choices, or for that matter, his own mistakes.
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hfree
06/03/09

@BabyJane: OMG. I've spent a lot of time in Cyprus, in a village in the middle of nowhere (with landmines in the surrounding areas and a UN presence), and it is nowhere near as bad as she tried to describe. It's not a third world country! Dina needs to chill the eff out. Her daughter was going to be with family, she'll be fine.
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Maritsa
06/03/09

@hfree: I missed this part, what did she say about Cyprus?! All of my mom's family lives there.
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BabyJane
06/03/09

@Laulau: Caroline strikes me as the type of mother who will be micromanaging her kids when they are in their sixties.

@hfree: Exactly, I kept thinking, what is she talking about?
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PhillyLass
06/03/09

@Maritsa: She went on and on about all the terrible things that might befall her daughter in Cyprus-- up to and including: picking up some bizarre disease from the water, having to shit in a hole in the ground because they don't have basic amenities, having to stay in a sub-standard hotel, being taken advantage of by creepy men looking to hit it with an American girl.

The weeping over her daughter's departure was so ridiculous. Her daughter was going on vacation with her father to visit the region where his family originated. It was a cool opportunity to get a sense of her family history and see another part of the world. And a going away party for a 2-week vacation? Seriously? My mom had the extended family over for ziti before I left for college. There were no tears or send-offs for summer camp.
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PhillyLass
06/03/09

@BabyJane: Yes-- and Caroline's daughters-in-law will be long-suffering souls.
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Maritsa
06/03/09

@PhillyLass: Oh no, please do not tell me these morons share my Cypriot ancestry - it makes me want to die.

Also, my family in Cyprus all somehow live in modern houses with toilets AND air-conditioning!!
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dessie
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
I still think Danielle is a crazy biotch. She didn't exactly come clean about what happened and she said point blank "I can't answer that" when Jacqueline asked her about the (ALLEGED!) kidnapping. And did anyone else notice how she just kept pouring more and more champagne for Jaqueline? CREEPY.
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freckles
06/03/09

@dessie: And how Jacqueline drove home after...I was like...dude, is it editing or did you just drink 5 glasses of champagne?
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laureltreedaphne
06/03/09

@dessie:

Yeah. And when Jacqueline basically asked, well, ok, maybe you didn't do this but did your boyfriend? She wouldn't answer. Which sounds like a big yes to me. She was not innocent in everything that allegedly went on, and having Jacqueline over, pouring her champagne, and implying that her sisters-in-law are her "enemies" is creepy.
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hfree
06/03/09

@freckles: That bugged the hell out of me! Way to be responsible Bravo editors, producers, Jacqueline, and Danielle.
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Laulau
06/03/09

@laureltreedaphne: @dessie: My understanding is that she made some sort of plea deal, so maybe she's legally barred from discussing details? (Or else it would put her in legal jeopardy if she accidentally incriminated herself in any way?)
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rednrowdy
06/03/09

@Laulau: that's what i'm thinking too. if she didn't have a plea deal, then she could just blab it to whomever - which considering how she met jacqueline, she totally would have done. then again, it's not a pleasant part of her past, and would you tell something that's really unpleasant about your own past to someone you just met? or to new friends? i know i wouldn't. i'd definitely wait a while.

plus, let's keep in mind that she has kids, and the kids aren't stupid. perhaps she's not comfortable airy her own dirty laundry when her kids are at an age where it could really affect them adversely in school, etc.
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PhillyLass
06/03/09

@dessie: ... and also trying to shift blame for this coming to light onto Dina. Er-- you know you've got a rap sheet. You know your ex wrote a book about your exploits. You knew people would look into your activities once you ended up on national television. How about some personal responsibility?

Of course, this is a woman who considers herself to pretty to get a job and is looking for a man to support her and her children. So, I guess personal responsibility is too much to expect.
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Snowbunny
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
As redeeming as that was, it kinda got under my skin when he told her to "shut up" and she said "don't tell me to shut up, I'm not your wife," right in front of Teresa. Not nice, Danielle.
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saintbernadette
06/03/09

@Snowbunny: I couldn't figure out if she meant, "Your wife doesn't mind if you talk to her that way" or "I don't let people tell me to shut up if they're not married to me."
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ElleL
06/03/09

She still irks me to no end. Yeah, this was a godo move, @Snowbunny: Exactly! She totally ruined any good I thought of her after that.
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Maritsa
06/03/09

@saintbernadette: I took it to mean the latter.
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IBleedGlitter: The High Priestess of Tinsel
06/03/09

@saintbernadette: Agreed. It might have been a slight dig at Teresa, but it sorta seemed like "You have no right to tell me what to do."
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Snowbunny
06/03/09

@saintbernadette: Judging from her history with men, I'd say she could have meant either, but Teresa chose the first option. She's gotta learn who her audience is.

Plus, Joe is delicious and JUICY.
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sequined
06/03/09

@Snowbunny: I agree; that was rude. However, Teresa chose to completely ignore the fact that her husband was being a tool and just whine about Danielle, which I thought was dumb. So not a high moment for anyone, though Danielle started off strong by opposing slur-use.
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Laulau
06/03/09

@saintbernadette: I totally read it as the latter, but I guess it's hard to know, not knowing more about what Teresa and Joe are like day-to-day. I'll jokingly say to people when they get possessive or bossy or something, "That's sweet, but you realize we're not sleeping together, right?"
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Little Green Frog (Wise Latina)
06/03/09

@saintbernadette: See, I've said what Danielle said before, and I meant the latter. I wasn't trying to offend the wife, but the husband.
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rednrowdy
06/03/09

@Laulau: "That's sweet, but you realize we're not sleeping together, right?"

with my friends, i'd have to change it to "that was cute, correct me if i'm wrong, but i'm pretty damn sure that we are not sleeping together...right?" this is what happens when you have a lot of gay boyfriends.
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bluebears
06/03/09

@Snowbunny: she's just so fucking abrasive. Like, yeah, it was absolutely right of her to call Joe out on being a huge asshole but then she made that remark that was like a smack at Theresa.
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saintbernadette
06/03/09

In reply to Real Housewives: Danielle Takes Offense To Gay Slurs
I'm torn lately. I've got the clusterfuck of RHoNJ versus the charming, relatively normal life showcased on The Little Couple, both on at the same time.

Thank God I can count on Tracie to recap the Housewives' most riveting moments.
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