Stop Asking Audra McDonald For Tickets to Hamilton, You Monsters
Look, I know you want to see Hamilton. And I know tickets are impossible to get unless you’re willing to spend thousands of your hard-earned dollars. And I know you were sort of friendly with Audra McDonald in the early 2000s after doing that one episode of SVU together. And I know you haven’t really spoken to her…
Am I Cherishing My Female Friends Enough? Am I??
I never thought I would be one to question my personal level of devotion to my friends, particularly those of the girl variety. I am a champion of all the best female empowerment mantras, known to shout “uteruses before duderuses” or “Venus before penis” at the emotional peak of any and all femininity-fueled moments,…
How to Flake Out on Plans If You're Depressed

When I was growing up, there was nothing better than when school was canceled for a snow day. It didn’t just mean no school; it was bigger than that. Snow was the universe’s way of saying, “Shhh, no more human activities, no cars, hush now, earth, settle down.” Snow just kindly smothers the world at large, isolating…
Today, Candy Carson Destroyed a Friendship
On Saturday morning, Ben Carson greeted and thanked a few of his remaining campaign volunteers in his Manchester, New Hampshire headquarters. Jezebel was not allowed to witness that meeting, because the space had “reached capacity,” but we were permitted to wait in the front hallway, where Carson and his wife, Candy,…
Yes, Meg Ryan Is Friends With Reese Witherspoon
Earlier this week, two of America’s former sweethearts, Reese Witherspoon and Meg Ryan, were spotted leaving an office building at the same time. To the best of my knowledge, the women have never been photographed together out in the wild—so the image isn’t entirely devoid of significance. But seeing them didn’t…
Jennifer Lawrence Is Back, and Singing 'Believe' By Cher
A rabbit jerks his head up, half-eaten carrot instantly forgotten. A squalling toddler quiets mid-scream, his gaze locked on the clear blue sky. A queen bee abandons her hive, feeling the pull of something stronger. “J. Law is back!” the breeze whispers. “J. Law is back!” the cockroaches sing. And the world comes…
Travel Brings Us Together, Even After Life Pushes Us Apart
I met Leah on the first day of college in the fall of 2003, playing two truths and a lie, a forced ice-breaker game for my entire floor that only served to exacerbate my social anxiety. In the game, you put forth three facts about yourself, one of which is false, and everyone is supposed to figure out which it is.
