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Bad News For Eva Longoria: French Men Maybe Not So Good In The Sack

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champagne
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
Where are all the British men at in all this!!!???
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Raspberry Swirly
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
I'll have the Italian and the Russian, please.
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When in Rome...
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
Excuse me for dissing the Italian men. I've been living in Italy for the past 3 months and I just don't find them attractive anymore.

Here is what I've learned:

There is not an inbetween here. They are either hot or not. If they are hot, then they are taken. If they are hot and single, they are usually gay or creepers. All of the hot single Italian men that I've met are creepers and will stalk you.

I'll take American men over the Italians. The Austrian men are also very very attractive.
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FourInchHeels
12/01/08

@When in Rome...: Another interesting fact: They're not sultry and foreign, it's actually just horny with an accent.
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Brigit
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
This is the only page in Jezebel that's loading on my pc!
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YourScreenplaySucks
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
I've got hard data, if you'll pardon the expression:

In descending order:

Denmark

U.S.A.

Italy

Sweden

Spain

France

Brazil

New Zealand

Colombia

Saudi Arabia

Yes, this is based purely on my globe-trotting promiscuity but I see no reason why that is any less scientific than this article - I have a meticulous eye for detail and my "N" is, ah, sufficiently large.
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YourScreenplaySucks
12/01/08

@Your Screenplay Sucks: Wow, listed like that in black & white I can see why I never got anything career/academia-related done in 2004-2006. Ok, off to read that "Why Do Women Sleep Around?" post now.
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Macloserboy
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
Wasn't there a survey of European women a few years back that pretty much said the French were also the worst lovers? So basically, what good is that Porsche if you don't know how to drive it?
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Shamrockette
12/01/08

@Macloserboy: Weren't the Italians deemed the best lovers?

Then I guess they compensate for it.
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mepo - Robert Cornhole invented it
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
Ok I need facts, planning my next vacation cannot be based solely on claimed average sizes, dammit I need actual hard data.
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PhDork
12/01/08

@mepo: Haha, HARD data.
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SisterSonny
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
Long...and thin. Like spaghetti noodles. Spagett! Ah-spoogi!
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FourInchHeels
12/01/08

@SisterSonny: In the words of my friend's mother .... long and thin will get it in, but short and thick'll do the trick!
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sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit)
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
The tag "The Euros" made me giggle because I suddenly worried that maybe penis size is aligned with currency inflation and Euro-peens are 1.5 times larger than U.S. dongs...
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Maritsa
12/01/08

@sarah.of.a.lesser.god.prepares.to.welcome.her.new.ovumlord: ...but shrinking fast!

I gotta say, I know a lot of Greek men both here and in Greece and they are not particularly modest.
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Flackette Goes Retro
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
All I can say is that the one Italian-American guy in my past certainly won for the greatest amount of body hair.
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morninggloria
12/01/08

@Flackette is a Red State Elitist: My Italian won not for having the biggest dick, but for being the biggest dick.
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Liz11685
12/01/08

@Flackette is a Red State Elitist: My boyfriend is majority Sicilian American, and HAIR EVERYWHERE!! He's even rather light and fair for an Italian. I will admit, I definitely agree with Italians being the most handsome!!
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sarah.of.a.lesser.god (aka Mrs. BrutallyHonestHobbit)
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
No wonder Cyrano's nose was so big! It had to match his other appendages.
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morninggloria
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
Or perhaps Greeks have mastered the art of underpromising and overdelivering.
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Wendy Marie Testaburger
12/01/08

@morninggloria: I think that must be the case unless its a case of relativity biting us in the ass. Some Greek woman is probably reading 4.89 inches and shuddering in horror at the "hugeness"
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morninggloria
12/01/08

@Eaten not Slurped: I read somewhere that they have a lot of anal sex in Greece...
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LaFemme
12/01/08

@morninggloria: I don't know about Greece, but I can tell you they must be having a ton of anal sex in Brazil. Every woman's magazine, every month has a feauture on anal sex. And all of the advice columns are about anal.
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Shamrockette
12/01/08

@LaFemme: They probably don't want to get pregnant and risk losing the males.

So what better way to avoid pregnancy than to have a dick shoved up your anus?
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FourInchHeels
12/01/08

@morninggloria: I can't speak for all, but the two Greeks I've hooked up with (once in Greece and once with a Greek exchange student in the States) had nothing to be ashamed of. 4.89 my ass.
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batmanbabe
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
Hmm.. I wonder what kind of "American" they mean. In my neck of NY "American" is "3rd or 4th generation Italian American or Italian-Irish American".

When I was in FL it was all about the Cuban-American boys and German-Americans.

Interesting.
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Flackette Goes Retro
12/01/08

@batmanbabe: And see, where I am "American" means sorta Anglo-ish Scots Irish who have been here for 200 years, with some German thrown in. I think this category is way too broad.
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bowleserised
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
I'm hoping it's going to be possible to avoid giganto-peen sized generalisations and stereotypes in this thread.
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bowleserised
12/01/08

@bowleserised: Also, only the other week there was another one of these oh-so scientific surveys which claimed that German men were the most handsome. What changed??
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sequined
12/01/08

@bowleserised: Different studies asking different women, probably. Ask German women and they'll probably tell you German men are hottest. French will say French (maybe). Ask American women and we'll say Australians.
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NefariousNewt
12/01/08

In reply to Size Queens
They use the metric system in Europe, so they just changed "centimeters" to "inches". Honestly, it's been blown out of proportion.
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jenalicious
12/01/08

@NefariousNewt: ha, blown.

(yeah, im 12.)
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NefariousNewt
12/01/08

@jenalicious: Join the club... I've been 12 for a while now.
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cirocco
12/01/08

@jenalicious: I assume you mean twelve INCHES. Bonjour, monsieur!
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FourInchHeels
12/01/08

@cirocco: Twelve inches .... AROUND.
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Bad News For Eva Longoria: French Men Maybe Not So Good In The Sack

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