• Rumors are flying that Lindsay Lohan is donating her time (except for any free clothes she snags) as Emanuel Ungaro's new "artistic director." This gossip item, however, doesn't spell "Emanuel Ungaro" correctly, so its veracity may be questionable. [Fox 411]

• Ungaro C.E.O. Mounir Moufarrige says Lohan's pay is "quite enough. It's expensive." Before hiring her, he told the press he asked her how much time she intended to spend in jail this year; her unpredictability, he says, "has been factored in" to her compensation. [ToL]
• The New York Times' Horacio Silva says he just had a talk with Renzo Rosso, who is "thisclose to naming a new designer at Martin Margiela." Margiela's departure from his namesake house was only confirmed recently, after months of speculation. In a follow-up tweet, Silva says Rosso maintains Margiela will still be involved in the house. Haider Ackermann and Raf Simons have been mentioned as possible contenders for Margiela's old job. [Twitter]
• What if a luxury label opened a store, and nobody bothered to turn up? [Shophound]
• Diane Von Furstenberg tweets from Madrid: "I just got robbed in the street in front of the Thyssen museum... My wallet, cash and all my credit cards!!" [Twitter]
• Two Bravo executives described the network as "desperate" to get a reality TV deal with Marc Jacobs. Their pitch? A no-strings-attached everyday doc. "Just live his life, his amazing life, and let us shoot it," said Andy Cohen. "I mean, just go. Just go! Open your eyes, let us put the tape in the camera, and let us go." [The Cut]
• Mo Rocca on the future of fashion? Hell. Yes. [CBS]
• Number of times Time mentions Crystal Renn was a "size-0 model": 3. Number of times Time mentions she had anorexia: 0. [Time]
• Karl Lagerfeld: "My father…was not stingy but he hated unnecessary expense but clothes he saw as the exception — he was of a different generation — if you were well dressed, half of the job was done. So I was told, be well dressed and doors will open." [i-D via Fashionista]
• Can you imagine David Spade, Anthony Kiedis, Fred Durst, and Ron Burkle hanging out at a Zac Posen show? Us neither. L.A. is so weird. [Style.com]
• Oscar de la Renta was presented with an award by Grace Coddington and Hamish Bowles. [Yahoo]
• At the same event, Barneys creative director/author Simon Doonan said, "For years, all my writer friends would say to me, what the fuck are you doing working in a store every day? And now they're saying to me, how can I get a job in a store?" This is because "There's nothing at the moment that is worse-compensated than freelance writing. NOTHING. You can get more money panhandling on the street. It's shocking." We'd agree but we're now too depressed to move. Simon Doonan works for a C.E.O.-less department store with stock about eighteen zillion levels below investment grade, a department store so consistently subject to rumors of bankruptcy that its parent company periodically has to step in to remind everyone that it guarantees the (giant, growing, pile of) debt. And even he has it better than we do. [Daily Intel]
• Meanwhile, Doonan says he finds the recession "a colossal bore." [WWD]
• Martin Lingstrom, a brand strategist, spent three years hooking up over 2,000 people to sensors that monitored their physical and neurological responses to advertising and shopping. He says that, while deciding to buy something, our brains release dopamine. However, then there's the guilt: "It's not very strong at the beginning but increases when you swipe your credit card through the credit-card reader." That feeling is physiological. Instead of reaching the obvious conclusion from his data — shopping is against nature, a pattern of unhealthy addiction and guilt-ridden behaviors, and everyone in fashion is totally fucked — Martin Lingstrom apparently still works as a brand strategist. [WSJ]
• The Wall Street Journal tried out Christian Louboutin and Piper Heidsieck's Le Rituel, the $5,000 glass slipper intended to serve as a champagne flute. The verdict? "It takes some finesse, balance, and you can't fill it very high with bubbly...It has its charm, but drinkers of champagne mat opt to keep their flutes handy." Imagine that. [WSJ]
• Alexander Wang says he staged his first fashion show when he was 15, at his brother's wedding. "It was like 35 looks or something. We hired hair and make-up and everything." [Independent]
• Heidi Klum is launching a fashion line. The footwear collection, all 48 styles, will be available starting next fall; to follow will be swimsuits and casual wear. [WWD]
• Claudia Schiffer, on the supermodels comeback: "One of the logical reasons would be that we sort of went away at the same time and most of us had kids at the same time and then we sort of came back. We've also worked for such a long time, we are reliable and professional and you know what you'll get." [Independent]
• Schiffer, who was once unceremoniously dropped by Karl Lagerfeld, during the grunge days, has been spotted with the designer around Buenos Aires. They, along with Baptiste Giabiconi and Freja Beha Erichsen, are shooting the next Chanel campaign. Local media reports that they ate "rich barbecue" for lunch one day. [Fashionologie]
• Vivienne Westwood made a series of gowns for Leona Lewis. In exchange, the pop star will wear the dramatic metallic corseted creations in all the promotional materials for her new album and single. [Telegraph]
• Odds Costume Rental, which supplied costumes for 22 years to productions like Law & Order and Road to Perdition, has filed for bankruptcy. Rising rent is one culprit — the business was hit with a $5,000/month increase last year — and the willingness of designers to give their clothes away to film and television shows is another. [Crains]
• Salvatore Ferragamo is entering the online retail market. [WWD]

• For the love of God. Khloe Kardashian says: "I want to be a skinny pregnant person." Actually, what she says when she's asked about having kids is:

"Honestly, I just lost weight! I want to be a skinny pregnant person, like how my sister Kourtney looks so cute pregnant. I can't be a house [after] I just lost weight." She does sort of redeem herself by saying: "I am always fat no matter how much weight I lose… [My sisters and I] are all curvy and we are all accepting of our body types. I think if I was in Hollywood by myself, I would be so much more susceptible to falling into having an eating disorder." [E!]

• Maybe Khloe shouldn't hear this, but Kristen Stewart says: "You should see my brother; he's, like, emaciated. We both just happen to be really skinny." [Us Magazine via Allure]
• Kim Kardashian will get $50,000 for celebrating her birthday at Tao in Las Vegas. A source says, "Kim is worth the huge fee because she's so hot." [Page Six]
• Headline Of The Day: "Michael Jackson's Giraffes in $100,000 War" [TMZ]
• Sources say the Jackson family has been invited to attend the premiere of This Is It; but Katherine Jackson and other family members insist they have been snubbed. [TMZ]
• Did Nicole Richie and Joel Madden have a secret wedding? Radar Online found out that Joel got a marriage license earlier this week. [The Star via Radar]
• Lindsay Lohan's on probation for DUI and has a court date this morning because she "failed to meet an unspecified probationary condition." [NY Post]
• Madonna on quitting Tracy Anderson workouts: "I learned a lot of great things working out with Tracy Anderson, I did not ditch or fire her. I simply wanted to try a new method of working out when my tour ended. We remain friends." [Page Six]
• Madonna and Carlos Leon threw a party for Lourdes' 13th birthday on Wednesday at trendy NYC restaurant Delicatessen. Lola had red velvet cake. [Gatecrasher]
• Eminem has declined to collaborate with fellow Michigan-er Madonna. She says: "I wanted to work with Eminem. I don't think he wanted to work with me. Maybe he's shy." That must be it! [Avril Lavigne's new man is Dole Food Company billionaire Justin Murdock. Not a sk8r boi. [Daily Telegraph]
• Diddy was throwing money off the stage at a show when his $20,000 diamond studded ring flew off. So naturally everyone was frisked before they left the event, which they didn't like. Guess what? The ring was not found. "He ain't getting' it back," one witness said. "Someone pocketed that, and they probably took it to the nearest jeweler." My guess? Someone swallowed it and is hoping for the best. [NY Post]
• "David Beckham's son Brooklyn is carving out a sporting name for himself... as an American footballer." Coaches at his school have called him a "wonderkid" and a "natural thrower and hard tackler." [The Sun]
• Courtney Love: Reformed Hole and is in the studio recording new tracks. This paper declares: "Should be interesting because she can definitely rock out." [The Sun]
• Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jamie Kennedy are still on and he "has no plans of ruining a good thing." [People]
• Jon Gosselin has reportedly approached awards shows with requests to appear as a presenter — and has been turned down by at least two productions. [MSNBC Scoop ]
• The guy who punched Leona Lewis in the face is an aspiring singer who didn't make it as a contestant on X Factor. Of course. [The Sun]
• There will be no lesbian talk in Anna Nicole Smith's hearing. Adjust accordingly. [Mirror]
• Except you can read about how "Anna Nicole Smith's female doctor funneled drugs to the Playmate to fuel their lesbian love affair" at this link. [NY Post]
• Howard K. Stern was urged to send Anna Nicole Smith to rehab, but told Anna's bodyguard rehab "would kill her." [LA Times]
• Does Donald Trump really not know who Tilda Swinton is? [Page Six]
• So you know how January Jones' rack looks huge on the cover of GQ? "They definitely did some significant retouching," claims a source. But GQ photo editor says: "Yes, they're real. And they're spectacular… People think that a person will look the same in every photograph, but that just doesn't happen… Terry [Richardson] likes to work with harder lighting, and that can create a stronger shadow — that, and body position and perspective could give the illusion that her breasts are bigger. January Jones needed no help. Trust me." [Page Six]
• Jimmy Kimmel and new girlfriend Molly McNearney — who works on his show — had a sleepover. And this is news. News accompanied by a picture of Jimmy "pasty and shirtless" on his balcony, watching Molly leave the morning after. [Radar Online]
• Wood alert: Jesse Metcalfe says that doing sex scenes with Eva Longoria for Desperate Housewives made him "pop a wheelie." [TMZ]
• Whitney Houston is mad at Wendy Williams. [Gatecrasher]
• Kylie Minogue: Spotted making out with her Spanish hunk at a party even though her parents were there. [Page Six]
• Depeche Mode's Dave Gahan denies he said "Thank you very much, Chile" when he was in Peru. [AP]
• Nigella Lawson's back went out, so she put on a corset and ate a chocolate bar. I'll have to try that next time. [Daily Express]
• BREAKING: Karina Smirnoff loves being single. [People]
• Fred Durst got married in July. Then separated a month later. And now he's filed for divorce. [People, TMZ]
• A column called "A Night Of Round Table With Monty Python" is predictably full of weird jokes. [NY Times]
• The new cast of Celebrity Apprentice includes Darryl Strawberry, Rod Blagojevich, Sinbad, Sharon Osbourne, Bret Michaels, Cyndi Lauper, Holly Robinson Peete, Carol Leifer, (who wrote for Seinfeld and whom the character of Elaine was based on), wrestlers Goldberg and Maria Kanellis, chef Curtis Stone and Olympic gold-medal swimmer Summer Sanders. [NY Post]
• "At the age of eight I discovered that I could write songs. My dad used to take them to the notary and register them so that nobody could steal them from me. Who does that? What parent takes a treasure in his child's scribbles?" — Shakira. [Guardian]
• "Before my third album, they warned me that if nothing really happened, they were going to drop me. I knew it was my last chance, so I took control. I started to get more involved with production. I started to use my own influences. My music was influenced more by the Anglo-Saxons than the local tropical or Latin roots. When I was singing in Spanish, I had a more rock'n'roll attitude. I was very inflexible, very rigid in many aspects. There were things that would be completely unacceptable to me, like wearing a leotard, or showing my legs. I was more of a purist then." — Shakira. [Guardian]
• "I envisioned that as my life: staying in academia to make a living and then taking summers off to write my novels. I understand the self-loathing and the resentment, and the discipline that it takes to sit down in front of a typewriter or computer every single day, whether it's going well or not going well … I didn't need to research how to be a professor [for Californication's third season] because I'd already been a teaching assistant when I was pursuing my Ph.D.; it was a very clear memory." — Former Yale doctoral student David Duchovny. [The Daily Beast]
• "In Uganda, fat is beautiful. [Jessica is] always scrutinized by the world. Beauty starts from within." — Joe Simpson, Jessica's dad. [MSNBC Scoop]
• "I think that for the first few seasons, it was very clear that Amanda didn't want to be bothered with any type of work. She's at a fashion magazine because she loves fashion — mostly just wearing it. There is a certain reality show with a certain stylist [Newton declines to identify it, but duh, it's Bravo's The Rachel Zoe Project], and I thought, 'Oh my God, that's a glimpse of Amanda's future.' We're going to see that Amanda's love of fashion can help her get ahead in her career. Amanda has a real skill that can actually benefit Mode magazine, apart from looking cute - not that she won't still look cute." — Becki Newton, Ugly Betty's Amanda. [TV Guide]
• "I go outside, and I'm wearing a funky T-shirt and my hair is dirty, and people say, 'What's wrong with her? She needs to invest in a hairbrush. I'm like, don't you get it? I'm not that girl! Like, I never was that girl. It's not like I was really clean-cut last year. The commenters are usually worse than the bloggers. I know what people say about me." — Kristen Stewart. [Us Magazine via Allure]
• "I grew up going to Disneyland twice a week. But I was banned for a year because I went to Disney prison. I was really young so I wasn't responsible for this - it was all my brother's fault. You get a stamp when you leave the park which if you put hairspray on it you can transfer it to someone else's hand, so in the parking lot he went up to somebody and said, 'Hey can we spray hairspray on your hand?0' and we transferred it. And then we go in through the turnstile and there's people there called Fox Fighters or some weird name, They take us aside and I'm like six-years-old and my brother says 'No matter what they say do not confess.' He was like a professional felon at twelve!" — Blake Lively.[Showbiz Spy]
• "It started with the fact that it was my very first week on The View and Barbara and Whoopi asked me if I thought the earth was round or flat. The response that came out was, 'I don't know. I'm trying to take care of my son.' I was really nervous. I was totally outside of my comfort zone and I made a comment that I didn't mean to make. It was a brain fart. I did not know that people were going to hate me as much as they did. I mean like, hate me. My website crashed. But then the women of The View came together and said, 'If we didn't think you could be here, you wouldn't be at this table. We love you. We support you. Don't even worry about it.' I got a ton of e-mails from women saying, I don't care if the earth is round or flat either, Sherri. I'm just trying to pay my bills. That's when I realized that we've gotta give ourselves a break or permission to say dumb things and keep moving. I know what a lot of other women are going through, you try to be perfect for everybody. We've gotta give ourselves a break." — Sherri Shepherd on her new self-help memoir, Permission Slips: Every Woman's Guide to Giving Herself a Break. [Time]
• "I'm old. It's an interesting thing to watch yourself grow older on screen. I was watching Up In The Air and I thought, 'Jesus, who's the old gray-haired guy?' And it was me. I never wear makeup for movies and now it's starting to show. But I'm kind of comfortable with getting older because it's better than the other option, which is being dead. So I'll take getting older." — George Clooney. [Telegraph]
• "I want to hate Megan Fox more than anything. We all do. But I read a bunch of her quotes, and she's witty and smart and carefree. I thought, 'This is the kind of girl I'd love to be friends with' "—Kristen Bell in Women's Health. [Page Six]
• "It was a challenging year. I may have thrown myself off a building. I think work saved me. I'm very grateful I had work." — Madonna. [The Sun]

• Legendary newsman Walter Cronkite has died at 92; President Obama released a statement calling Cronkite "a voice of certainty in an uncertain world. He was family. He invited us to believe in him, and he never let us down."[Reuters]

• "He was the most important voice in our lives for thirty years, and that voice made people reach for the stars. I hate the world without Walter Cronkite."- George Clooney [E!]
• ''Walter was who I wanted to be when I grew up. He set a standard for all of us. He made television news what it became.''- CBS News' Bob Schieffer [NYTimes]
• "Walter Cronkite was and always will be the gold standard. His objectivity, his even-handedness, his news judgment are all great examples. He, as much as anyone, is responsible for developing network television news. He set the standard. He told it 'the way it is' and all of us who are privileged to work in this business owe him an enormous debt of gratitude." -Charles Gibson of ABC News[ABC]
• "There never was and there never will be another Walter Cronkite. We trusted him and that trust was well founded. He was also a jolly and supportive friend. He will be missed by each of us individually who knew him and by the whole country who loved him." -Barbara Walters [ABC]
• "He had depth, foreign reporting experience, endless excitement about the news, and an irresistible irreverence. A call, a note, a compliment from Walter was pretty much the Nobel Prize for a young reporter. I am so lucky to know what it was to be part of the Cronkite team." -Diane Sawyer [ABC]
• Gawker has a more in-depth piece on Cronkite's passing, which can be found here. [Gawker]
• A recent Zogby poll indicates that people are more likely to remember Michael Jackson for his humanitarianism, rather than the allegations of child molestation that plagued him throughout the later parts of his career. [UPI]
• Mischa Barton's friends say they saw her recent hospitalization coming: ""She has been on a destructive path for a while now," says a source, "Her drug and alcohol [use] has gotten to a point where it drove people away." [People]
• Jessica Simpson is handling her breakup with Tony Romo by "surrounding herself with a network of support." [People]
• Lauren Conrad takes a shot at Heidi Montag in August's Harper's Bazaar: when asked why she thinks Montag is posing for Playboy, Conrad says, "They're not going to pay for themselves." Oh, The Hills crew. Always keepin' it classy. [USWeekly]
• Jon Gosselin recently told a friend that he's "bringing back my good ol' high school days!" Except he's not, really, because in high school, he didn't have eight kids to constantly embarrass in the press. [USWeekly]
• "I was involved in the typical adolescent love triangle, and I found myself having incredibly violet thoughts about this girl. I just thought, ‘If she goes near my boyfriend, I'm going to rip out her throat.'"-Diablo Cody, on her inspiration for Jennifer's Body. [JustJared]
• One of Nadya Suleman's children, a 2 year old boy, was rushed to the hospital last night after accidentally drinking chemicals from a volcano making kit. "I knew it would all get blown out of proportion if I called, but I didn't want to take any chances," says Suleman "I think I did the right thing. He's okay." [People]
• Paula Abdul's manager says Abdul won't return to American Idol next year unless she's properly compensated: "She's not a happy camper as a result of what's going on. She's hurt. She's angry," her manager, David Sonenberg, says, "I think at this point we're going to be considering everything, including some kind of a competition show. She has tremendous ideas for a whole variety of shows." I guess this means she isn't forever our girl? [LATimes]
• "I knew I wanted to be an actor, but it was quite an embarrassing thing to say out loud – a bit like saying, 'I'm so good-looking I want to be a model.' I was about 20 when I finally started admitting to friends and family the egotistical profession I wanted to be a part of. And then, when I graduated, it was either that or sitting alone in a library and doing a PhD, so I decided I'd try to make people laugh instead."- Sacha Baron Cohen [DailyMail]
• Fred Durst was married on Thursday. The wedding guests left with a dumb red baseball cap and a cd titled, "WTF were we all thinking in 1998?" Not really. But maybe! [Star]
• "I believe we have many lives and that our spirits are everlasting. I know I have many guardian angels with me all the time. I've always been aware of that since I was a child, and I'm very grateful."- Cameron Diaz [DailyExpress]
• Kate Moss recently purchased a "vocal-chord-friendly sauna," whatever that is. [TheSun]
• "I'll come home to find a big party at our house and my father will be rolling around naked in ketchup on the floor, and I'll think, 'Oh yeah, it's Tuesday.'"- Andy Dick's son, Lucas Dick [PageSix]
• Proving that the entire universe has gone off the rails, the Oscar Meyer Weinermobile crashed into a Wisconsin house yesterday. No one was hurt, and insurance will cover the damages of both the house and the hot-dog shaped car. But for the love of god, people! If the Weinermobile can't keep it together, what hope is there for the rest of us?! [ONTD]

• VIP guests at Britney Spears' recent London gig weren't too happy when they discovered that Britney had declared the backstage to be a alcohol free area as a result of "her problems with alcohol." [TheSun]

• Phil Spector's wife, Rachelle, is now complaining about the conditions he's being forced to live in. "He's locked in a 5-by-9-foot cell 23½ hours a day," she says. "They treat people worse than animals. I want that known." [NYPost]
• Oh snap! Iggy Pop has singled out Billy Corgan and Fred Durst as the reasons why rock stars pretty much suck these days, calling them "idiot thugs with guitars making crappy music...Anyone from Smashing Pumpkins to - what's the one with Fred Durst?... There are a million billion of them. And people think they're gods, man. I took great pains not to think first because the thing I can't stand is a rock star who thinks he's got brains. They're always so damned dull!" [DailyExpress]
• Peter Jackson is finally making an appearance at ComicCon, in order to support his friend Neill Blomkamp's film District 9. He will most likely spend the entire time saying, "No, we haven't cast Bilbo yet, I swear!" [NYTimes]
• Lost star Emilie de Ravin is divorcing her husband, Josh Janowicz, after three years of marriage. [People]
• "As you can imagine, this is very hard. All together there were five of us that had the Carradine name. David had a lot of admiration for his father as an actor, and his mother he loved very dearly. We have all been close and we all love each other."-Bruce Carradine, on the death of his brother David. [USWeekly]
• Jay-Z released a new song, "Death Of The Autotune" on Hot97 last night. Sample lyric: "This ain't a No. 1 record/This is practically assault with a deadly weapon." R.I.P., Autotune? [HipHopGalaxy]
• Robert DeNiro is currently starring in commercials for...Subaru? [TimesOnline]
• Rosie O'Donnell says she's learned that screaming gets you nowhere: "I learned that when you yell, nobody hears you," she says, "The best communicators have to live and present themselves in a peaceful manner. And that's going to be a lifelong quest of mine." [CBSNews]
• "I love Perez! Like I think it's really cool that he asked that rad question at Miss America [he quizzed Miss California on gay marriage]. Once he put a picture of that blue catsuit I used to wear next to a Teletubbie, and I could have been like, 'You're an asshole.' But I thought it was really fucking funny."- Beth Ditto [Guardian]
• Universal has responded to allegations that Sacha Baron Cohen injured a woman on the set of Bruno by releasing this statement: "The allegations made by Richelle and Lance Olson in their complaint are completely baseless. Filmed footage of the full encounter, which took place more than two years ago, clearly shows that Ms. Olson was never touched or in any way assaulted by Sacha Baron Cohen or any member of the production and suffered no injury. If the Olsons elect to proceed with their frivolous action, we expect each of the defendants to be fully vindicated." [DeadlineHollywood]
• Looking forward to Whitney Houston's new album? This "sizzle reel" will get you even more excited. [Popbytes]
• Susan Boyle's brother says she's doing much better now that she's left The Priory: "She is much happier. She seems a lot more like herself," she says, "Things are becoming clearer for her now. She's now beginning to believe that, "Yes indeed, I will be a singer." [DailyMail]
• Emma Thompson says that Britain is falling behind the rest of the world in terms of the way they treat working mothers: "It depends where you are in the world. It's not brilliant here in Britain compared to, for example, Scandinavia – maternity leave and everything is different and they're much more clued in to what parents and children need," she says, "We still have quite a lot of Victorian principles hanging on, you can see it and feel it." [DailyExpress]
• Penn Badgely says he wants to star in a remake of Blade Runner. Cue the fanboy outrage! [DailyExpress]
• Jon and Kate Gosselin are speaking with divorce lawyers. Can't we all just get divorced from the both of them, please? [PageSix]
• James Franco and Robert Pattinson are reportedly fighting it out to play the lead in a Jeff Buckley biopic, which is dumb, as everyone knows that James is pretty much the spitting image of Jeff. So whatever, Sparkly Vampire! [ONTD]

• Beyoncé on her fake "screeching" recording:

"I haven't heard it but it sounds completely ridiculous." Her dad/manager Matthew Knowles adds: "At 12 years into her career, the last thing someone should be questioning is her vocal ability. That would be like questioning if Kobe Bryant could shoot a jump shot. The vocals were obviously altered." Okay okay we get it. [MTV]

• Lindsay Lohan is in Australia's Cleo magazine. She's asked: "As you're constantly in the public eye, how hard is it for you to forge successful, long lasting relationships?" She answers: "I don't think it's so hard. What I've learnt most is to keep my private life private." O RLY? Also, when asked about her "perfect evening," she says: "Staying in and watching a movie!" [ONTD]
• Lindsay talked to Ellen about her split with Sam: "When you don't know you're breaking up… Really weird." LL says the break came out of nowhere. "I had no idea what was going on. I just hadn't seen her in, like, a week. She, like, disappeared." Also, is this underminey? "I think it's been really good for me. I thought it would be so much harder and it hasn't been. My sister's been here with me." [People]
• "Lindsay Lohan is shockingly skinny again." [NY Daily News]
• Kate Moss maybe cheated on Jamie Hince with Eve Berlin from The Living Things. In Berlin. The rocker's brother says he walked in on Kate and Eve (born Yves) with his clothes off. [The Sun]
• Josh Hartnett's 911 call is on TMZ for some reason, and you can hear Josh say the words "food poisoning" and "diarrhea." [TMZ]
• What the goop: Gwyneth Paltrow gave Mario Batali free membership to that superduper exclusive gym she and Tracy Anderson opened. An insider says: "Mario is the only fat friend she has, and she wants him to change." [Page Six]
• This was in Midweek Madness yesterday but here it is again: Nadya Suleman's stripper name was Angelina. [MSNBC]
• Oh Christ: Miss California will appear at the Gospel Music Awards. [Yahoo News via AP]
• Dolly Parton had lunch in Manhattan and a blogger witness it. Dolly had an "expertly made-up ageless face, Barbie doll suit (paired with sheer black leggings), that famous platinum mane, and shoes that no other human being could possibly walk in." [mediabistro.com]
• Cyndi Lauper wants Susan Boyle to be in a film starring Cyndi and Tippi Hedren. "I think she's a kick. I really like her," sez Lauper. The movie is about "baby boomers who put their lives on hold to chase their dreams." [Reuters]
• By the way, when Susan Boyle said she'd never been kissed, that was a joke, people/ She says: "Never been kissed? I've never stopped." [Music Toob]
• Audrina is going to Spencer and Heidi's wedding this weekend. "They're two peas in a pod … I can't see either of them with anyone else." Is that a compliment? [People]
• Uh-oh! Jennie Garth found out that her husband Peter Facinelli cooked a pasta dinner for the cast of the Twilight sequel New Moon and she is not happy: "I am pissed off, because he doesn't make me pasta dinners. I don't know when was the last time the man cooked for me!" [E!]
• Rihanna and Katy Perry are boating & beaching together in Barbados. It looks so fun. I want to go to there! [NY Post]
• Speaking of New Moon, you guys can have that lame ass sparkly vampire, I'll take the shirtless hot hotties of the wolf pack. Have you seen this new picture? Soooo down with brown. And only one of them is technically underage! What's that? Their abs are Photoshopped? Lalalala I can't hear you. [People]
• NBC is considering running fewer episodes of Heroes next year, which will supposedly interrupt the storyline less. And you know, cut costs. [AdAge]
• Someone stole thousands of dollars of jewelry from Hayden Panettiere's L.A. home last week. [TMZ]
• Kanye West was "polite and gracious" when he showed up — by himself — at the Tribeca Film Festival's kickoff dinner. DON'T GET ALL NORMAL ON US, YEEZY!!!!!!1!!! [Gatecrasher]
• When filming ends on the last Harry Potter movie, Emma Watson says: "I will be . . . uncontrollable. It's been half of our lives. It's made us, it's formed us. It's such a big part of my life, so it will be really sad –and so much of the crew who have been there since the beginning are like my family." [Telegraph]
• Gillian Anderson may appear on Doctor Who. [Daily Express]
• Bruce Springsteen's wife wasn't at his concert on Tuesday night OMGAFFAIROMG. [Star]
• Alan Cumming supports New York Governor David Paterson's gay-marriage bill. "He's not doing it for political reasons. Like, when did gay marriage become something that could make you popular, for fuck's sake? That's just, like, being a little nippy, people being bitches." As for Rudy Giuliani? Cumming says: "I think he's an asshole. Please quote me on that." [NY Mag]
• Um, Elizabeth Banks will star and produce a comedy called Forever 21. Is it about disposable bar-crawling clothes? [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Since Matthew McConaughey is in a flick called Ghosts Of Girlfriends Past, he is forced to answer questions about past girlfriends. [E!]
• This just in: "Natalie Portman and Chief Executive Officer Christine Aylward launched MakingOf.com, a behind-the-scenes Web portal that provides an intimate, fresh look into the process of creating entertainment by the insiders themselves." [PR Newswire]
• Hot hottie Channing Tatum, of the critically acclaimed film Step Up, says of his new flick, Fighting: "I'm not a tough guy. I'm probably not even a good fighter." It's called ACTING, people, jeez. [USA Today]
• Anna Nicole Smith cannot rest in peace because there's always some kind of dramz in her family; this time it's her half-sister suing the publisher of her book Train Wreck: The Life and Death of Anna Nicole Smith, because she claims she hasn't been paid. [TMZ]
• Want to see a foxy picture of Christian Bale, from Empire magazine? Click click click! [ONTD]
• Prison Break's Lane Garrison has reached a financial settlement with the parents of the 17-year-old he killed in a drunk driving accident back in 2006. [TMZ]
• Mary-Louise Parker is not leaving Weeds. Had you heard that she was? [E!]
• Cameron Diaz is in talks to star in a "legal comedy" called Bobbie Sue, about a "hard-charging female ambulance chaser whose mindset makes her the ideal candidate to be the face of a prestigious law firm when a powerful client is sued in a sexual discrimination case." [Variety]
• Paul Giamatti will star in an indie drama called Barney's Version, in which he plays a man who has "led a reckless life highlighted by three marriages, two children and being a 'person of interest' in the mysterious disappearance of his bosom buddy. [Variety]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Jewel is trying for a baby. [Gatecrasher]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Jennifer Hudson is indeed pregnant. [NY Daily News, Page Six]
• Divorce lawyers are telling Oksana Pochepa (the chick who claims she's having a fling with Mel Gibson) to shut her trap. [The Sun]
• John Travolta is in Argentina shopping for land, what are you doing? [Yahoo News via AFP]
• Oh wait: This report says John Travolta is alone in Tahiti. [People]
• After five years and 241 shows at Caesars Palace, Elton John played his last show last night. Will he come back? [AP]
• Why is there a picture of Mariah Carey's husband and Spongebob Squarepants at the top of the Empire State Building? Is this real life? Is it going to be like this forever? [Gatecrasher]
• Here is old footage of Tony Danza being a whiny baby because he has to be on a local news program. [Videogum]
• Fred Durst is engaged and is the happiest man alive, should you care. [People]
• When Lou Reed is on tour, he would like to eat organic lamb, guava melon, or "LOCAL ORGANIC White Fish." [The Smoking Gun]
• Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, with Regis Philbin, will be revived this summer on ABC. [AP]
• Rob Lowe will be in TV movie on Lifetime, set your DVR. [UPI]
• Blind item: "Which hunky A-lister checks himself into swanky hotels under the alias 'King Kong'?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I was so incensed, so passionate about having a Democrat in the White House, I was insane. I was just crazed. I trust this administration. I trust Barack Obama and his intelligence and have faith that he'll do the right thing. So I've been able to relax the last few months." — Barbra Streisand. [Yahoo News via Reuters]
• "This issue is important to me. I didn't know too much about it before becoming a parent but whooping cough is on the rise. There have been a significant increase in reported cases over the past decade. Parents don't realize that they can get pertussis and transmit the disease to their babies." — Jennifer Lopez, the spokesperson for Sounds Of Pertussis. [UPI]
• "I had kind of a binge eating disorder where instead of dealing with my emotions, I would stuff them down with food. I actually went into a treatment center for it. It was definitely that excess eating to kind of just stuff all the emotions down ... I really was a creative kid who didn't know she was creative and didn't have those outlets because I was always afraid to join the theater group and not perform. The moment I started doing music, the moment I did what I loved to do in my life and committed to it, I don't have those problems anymore ... I have my outlet. I have that form of expression. I can go to the studio and talk about my feelings." — American Idol judge Kara DioGuardi. [People]
• "The most dynamic and sophisticated comedy to hit television in the last 10 years, if you like, and here it is, they're calling me. It's a great, great feeling. And as quickly as it came, I was on the set. It really felt like an out-of-body experience. 'I watch this show; what am I doing here? What is Steve Carell doing, improvising and trying to make me laugh?' They all do that. John [Krasinski] especially. He said to me the other day, 'My character hates your character so much, it makes me want to hate you in real life. Is that OK?' They're great guys, I love working on that show." — Idris Elba on his stint on The Office. [LA Times]
• "I wouldn't want to change myself too much because that would really make things a bit false. I want to receive people as the real me, a real person." — Susan Boyle. [NY Daily News]
• "You just leave them with enough food and water to survive. No, first of all, you have an amazing wife, and she gets it and handles all the craziness. And you just try to make the time you got really cool. When you're there, you're totally present, and you just bounce back and forth. At least I'm not in the military with people shooting at me. I have friends who are in Iraq. At least when we're gone, I'm in a hotel room. Maybe, I may lose my life to this really bad room service. That's the threat."— Taylor Hanson on how he handles going on tour and leaving four kids at home. [People]
• "It's none of my business, but you know what I say about that? I understand the situation. I understand passion with young kids. My personal opinion about that is, he's just a baby. He's just a little baby that don't know how to handle his emotions when it comes to a woman. And he probably hears this and thinks, 'I know how to handle my emotions'; we all think we do. But the fact [is], you look at this person and you might be crazy in love, but we don't know how to handle those feelings." — Mike Tyson on Chris Brown. [MTV]
• "I just put his foot in my mouth. There was no sucking. It was a spontaneous moment, too — it wasn't in the script. I just went for it. I still don't even know how Zac felt about me cramming his foot into my mouth. It's not like we're e-mail buddies." — Saturday Night Live's Jason Sudeikis, on his skit with Zac Efron. [Gatecrasher]

• Reports of LeAnn Rimes cheating on her husband, Dean Sheremet, just got juicier: Sheremet's family members called in to a radio show this morning to announce that he is gay. [Perez Hilton]

• Originally a spokesperson for the ski resort where Natasha Richardson was fatally injured said she was walking around and laughing after the fall and went to the hospital an hour later. Paramedics say they saw her sitting on a stretcher and were sent away. She was taken to the hospital three hours later. [TMZ]
• You can watch Lindsay Lohan's new Fornarina commercial here. For some reason it reminds us of Barbie and the Rockers. [Just Jared]
• Lindsay says of Britney Spears: "She's marketed as an entertainer, which is what she is. Not necessarily as, like, an artist. And I respect that about her, cause she doesn't want to pretend." [Jossip]
• Lindsay is having a hard time trying to rustle up work these days. "It's scary when you realise, 'Oh my God, I'm not working'. And have a house to pay for now," she says. Lindsay added: "I'm talking to (lots of people). One is Sean Penn - I spoke to him the other day. We're trying to get Seth Rogen for this project, but Seth won't call us back." [The Mirror]
• Lindsay may not have a job but she just bought a new Maserati. [Perez Hilton]
• A source claims that model Natasha Ellie is the woman who sent Chris Brown a text message the night of the assault, not his manager. Supposedly lyrics to Rihanna's song "Emergency Room" is about Rihanna discovering Chris was cheating on her with Natasha. [Hollywood Rag]
• Doug Reinhardt has asked Paris Hilton's father Rick for her hand in marriage and will presumably propose soon. The couple have been dating since last month. [Hollywood Rag]
• Fred Durst is still talking about his brief relationship with Britney Spears. He says: "I just guess at the time it was taboo for a guy like me to be associated with a gal like her." [People]
• Kelly Osbourne just left rehab a few weeks ago and says this is the first time she's been clean since she was a teenager. "I had my tonsils taken out [at age 13], and they gave me liquid Vicodin," said Osbourne. "I found, when I take this, people like me. I'm having fun, I'm not getting picked on. It became a confidence thing." [Just Jared]
• Vanessa Hudgens is "clearly the man in the relationship" because she pumped gas while Zac Efron sat in the car. [The Superficial]
• Ellen DeGeneres is going to be on the cover of O Magazine. Putting different people on the cover of a magazine? What's Oprah thinking? [Perez Hilton]
• In this video Ellen DeGeneres and Katy Perry sing "I Kissed A Girl." [Perez Hilton]
• Charlie Sheen can't tell his twins apart. "They're not identical, but at this stage, they're similar enough," says Charlie. He says he and his wife picked the names Max and Bob because they "are very short and simple - easy to spell and remember ... Bob is the same frontward and backward. I'm a fan of a short and simple name." [The Star]
• Gwyneth Paltrow says she's feeling "mother guilt" because she has to take her kids out of their London home for her Iron Man 2 shoot. She says: "I barely ever do films, I'm with them almost all the time. But in a way it makes the transition harder. I feel like if I worked all the time, then they would be used to it. But when I'm always there and always doing the school runs and I'm always around and then I just disappear for 14 hours a day to film, it's hard." [The Daily Express]
• It's pretty clear where Suze Orman wants the profits from George W. Bush's book to go. She said she wants to tell the former president: "You blew up every single financial vessel we had and if you think you aren't personally responsible, well, the blame starts at the top. There is no higher top than you, SIR! If I were you, I would feel so absolutely horrific that I would take every penny I had and distribute it to anybody and everybody to help them in whatever way I could. You owe the American people every penny of your fortune and your family's fortune." [Perez Hilton]
• Years ago, James Toback directed the film Black and White, in which Robert Downey, Jr. hits on Mike Tyson. Before the shoot, which took place soon after Downey got out of rehab, RDJ found out Toback hadn't told Tyson about the scene. Toback recalls: "Downey said, 'What if he gets angry? I said, 'I would assume he would.' He said, 'How far do you want me to take it?' I said, 'Take it until he responds in the extreme.' Downey responded, 'What if he kills me?' I said, 'Well, I haven't thought about that. I think it's unlikely-no better than a 5% chance.' But, at the rate you're going, you're going to end up dying in the parking lot of a motel in Culver City. So what would be better ... that or dying like this?"" [Black Book]

The Good:
Eva Amurri shows why the little black dress is what it is. Wow.


Emile Hirsch is definitely underdressed compared to his co-stars. But I'm a sucker for a stripey anything.


Llittle Paulie Litt is sorta my hero.


Susan Sarandon's leather coat is really ugly. But son Miles Robbins is so damn cute and clearly loves his mom so damn much that I forgive and forget all.


Could Stephen Colbert and his family be any cuter?! See, they all look smart in jeans. Emile Hirsch, take note.


Same goes for Vincent D'Onofrio and his wife and kid.


I think this is my favorite of Christina Ricci's premiere dresses to date. Smart and fun.


The Bad:
Grace Hightower, per usual, is always a class act. But Robert DeNiro looks like a total schlump. Would it kill him to wear pants that fit?


The Ugly:
I'm sorry: Why was Fred Durst there?

[Images via Bauer-Griffin and Getty.]

The Good:
Christine Lahti looks classy in her red shift, albeit somewhat stiff.


Danica Patrick's dress is exactly what "flirty and feminine" should be.


Faye Dunaway is still rocking her Bonnie and Clyde look. But whatever: It works for her.


Fred Durst's ladyfriend has a pretty dress.


Is it weird that I would like Holland Taylor's dress? It's so old-school cool.


I'll take Maggie Grace's Audrey Hepburn-esque dress too, thanks.


What a relief to see a starlet not in a boob-flaunting dress. Thanks, Kristen Bell.


Please God let these be Lorne Michaels' daughters.


Molly Shannon's mod-styled dress and cutie-pie husband are both winners in my book.


Rachel Dratch once helped me hide when the Arctic Monkeys' publicist attempted to throw me out of a Saturday Night Live after-party. Her sweet dress is clearly a representation of her sweet-as-can-be disposition.


Tina Fey is like an old-fashioned glamor girl in this dress. (So why can't she seem to relax and enjoy it?)


The Bad:
Honestly, Amy Poehler's dress could be indeed hiding a bump.


Annabella Sciorra is bordering on caricature in the vampy dress and tousled bedroom waves.


Though I love Padma, I do not approve of her styled-by-Lauren-Conrad-esque look.


Sigourney Weaver: The elementary school art teacher you never knew you had.


The Ugly:
Dear Alice Kremelberg: Your moccasin booties sure do look comfy. But why are you wearing them outside of your house?

[Images via Getty.]