Rescued "Happy Feet" Penguin Returning To Health

Good news! The emperor penguin who strayed 3,000 miles from its home on Antarctica, to New Zealand — where he/she ate six-and-a-half pounds of wet sand, thinking it was snow — is reportedly doing much better. After we watched last week's bleak video of the lost penguin barely able to move during his rescue from the… »6/28/11 10:10am6/28/11 10:10am

10 Crappy Facts About Heaven From The One Person Who Was Actually Raptured Yesterday

Turns out, God loves premature cynicism, absurdity, crippling insecurity masked in mostly bad jokes, and 12 year old boy humor, and thus yesterday at 6 pm, I was sucked by God's Hoover to heaven, just like that radio charlatan predicted. What he didn't predict, however, is how it really is up here. »5/22/11 11:52am5/22/11 11:52am